nozomiii-b - Tumblr blog

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Why am I so trashyyyyyyyy

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From xhs

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虚伪 😡

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对有些人有一点点失望 😢

为什么每个人都不够真诚 😢

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爱到妥协

到后来还是无解

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3am and wide awake watching The Tale of Rose while H is sound asleep next to me.

Recently I’ve been experiencing intense waves of emotions … passion, dispassion. I’ve also been having many epiphanies. Still in the process of figuring out what everything means.

不知道自己要的是什么， 也不够了解自己。

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A million things to process

I don't have time to describe this in greater detail although I really should, but our time in Stockholm and Copenhagen was perfect (Stockholm slightly more perfect, H would add haha). Stockholm - an elegant middle aged lady; Copenhagen - it's gritter, spunkier, younger cousin (yet more expensive)

Need to claim my insurance for the many flight delays

I am experiencing a lethal combination now of mild reflux (almost cured during hols though strangely) + period + terrible eczema flare + low moods

What is my low mood a result of I don't know??? Possibly a combination of the physical pain I'm living through + a sinking emptiness

Just sort of got over my fear of flying (conquered that small plane journey from Frankfurt to Stockholm + survived 2 13=hour long flights), all these headlines about airline turbulences causing death and injuries is making me kinda nervous

Don't know if I'm chasing highs just to avoid a deep sinking sense of aimlessness and emptiness / my wants keep shifting

What do I love and what keeps me inspired if it is not travelling????????????? I love travelling, but it almost seems like I've forgotten how to be happy without it

Suddenly a little bit out of love with Japanese. I go through these phases it's so cray be cray. Now that I've invested in Japanese class I need to fall back in love with it. But I'm in a post-europe-trip europe-mood

Mental health not doing great lately, glad I can get honest with myself about this

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Good morning from Frankfurt Airport!

Supposed to arrive at Frankfurt at 6pm yesterday and then get on the flight to Stockholm at 730pm but due to the delay at Changi Airport we only reached Frankfurt at 9pm and our Stockholm flight was pushed back to 10:30am today.

It was quite chaotic when we landed last night. The whole group of us who missed our various flights ended up drifting around the airport in search of a service staff who could assist us. Took us 30min. The whole airport was surprisingly quite dead … almost felt like a L4D2 map.

Anyway we eventually found a service staff who put us on a shuttle to a hotel near the airport. It was an ok hotel but they gave us an odd number of pillows (3 pillows for 2 ppl) and didn’t provide us with toothbrush :-( We didnt bother to bathe or wash up — too tired after a 13h long flight and just went to sleep.

I slept till 5am Europe time which is great cos I’m feeling quite energetic now but H only slept till 2am (9am Singapore time) because of his body clock. We then had a buffet breakfast at the hotel — great croissants btw — before catching the shuttle back to the airport (where we are now).

2 hours till our flight and I’m feeling all nervous because I have abit of aerophobia especially when it comes to small planes and this will be the first small plane (3x3) I’m sitting on in 8 years!!!! Praying that this will not be a traumatic experience.

We’re currently walking around the airport now and yes I’m blogging while walking around …... maybe this can be a new thing I do while travelling (just don’t mind the unpolished writing).

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Our SQ flight to Frankfurt is delayed ……….. bored.

By now we should already be in the air.

Long day ahead! 12h50m then a connecting flight from Frankfurt to Arlanda that is 2h5m. My whole bag is actually an entertainment pack (switch, kindle, iPad, headphones, even my jap practice book) just in case KrisFlyer entertainment system fails me.

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Dyeing my hair now! Had black hair for too long so it’s time to go brown again! Trying out an organic dye salon near my parent’s house!

Kinda incurring a sleep debt lately. Need to make up for it!!!!! On Friday night, I hung out with the girls till 1+am and only got to bed at 3/4am. Then had Mich over for breakfast at 9am the next morning (ie ytd morning). Planned to sleep early but was hit by terrible stomachache at 2am which lasted till 4am :-(((((((((( as aptly put by H, “poor rah”.

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Lalalalala

I have serious pre-flight issues. My brain sends anxiety signals to my body and it always reacts by making me fall sick in some way before a flight. WHY. STRESS. My acid reflux is kind of gone (PRAISE GOD) but I'm healing from a stiff neck, stomachache and diarrhea bleh (Dear God, please take away these ailments)!

Anyway, here to record that last week I had quite a few social gatherings! I enjoyed myself though sometimes I feel like I fill my brain with so much fluff and useless stuff that it's a bit challenging for me to be in the moment and connect with others fully about real world stuff (but I really try)! Maybe I've just been chillin' in my own world wayyyy too much.

Honestly, I just want to watch cute videos, listen to nice songs and indulge in good plotlines .......... AM I EVEN 30 lol. Who cares though, who says there's only one way to embrace our thirties!

Random thought to download Maplestory with my colleague YAY.

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It's official, I have GERD

I gave up trying to "live with it" and go au naturale in healing my acid reflux .... so I went to see a doctor this afternoon and was proven right about my suspicions that I have GERD. Dr Pang was very scientific in explaining to me what that means ...... in short, it's pretty common, highly curable, and requires a diet and lifestyle change. Came home and took some Gaviscon (liquid) that was prescribed and it's so yucky gosh. If in two days' time, my symptoms persist, it'll be time for me to try some proton pump inhibitors.

In other news, today is day 7 of no coffee and no milk. Yesterday, I had matcha oat latte at Hattendo and it's so freaking good YUMS (I think I found my alternative to coffeeeeeee).

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First thing I did this morning was watch Sakura

I woke up with a super ok feeling but that was short lived because immediately after breakfast (apple + honey), a weird feeling came back ..... man.

That said, felt a little comforted/understood when Sherms said she had this acid reflux two years ago too .....

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Things I would love to be doing (instead of working)

watching movies/films/series/anime

playing cozy games

reading books

shopping

massage

making music

drawing and painting

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Although the globus sensation is gone, I still feel pretty uncomfortable due to acid reflux :( help.

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My Lord knows the way through the wilderness.

All I have to do is follow.

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Sometimes I wonder if this society just wants to kill off our ambitions.