nullnobodynothing

[nullnobodynothing]

Don't feel too good

[nullnobodynothing]

Not really doing too good I'm sorry

[nullnobodynothing]

I want to fucking cut so bad holy shit

[nullnobodynothing]

It's good that I'm not going to this film festival event because I'm kidding myself by thinking I'm not the fucking ugliest most disgusting person in the world and would just be embarrassing myself by showing my fucking face at an event with respectable adults

[nullnobodynothing]

Listen: sorry

[nullnobodynothing]

idont wanna cry i feel like ive cried enough for a lifetime

[nullnobodynothing]

i just want to rot in here i dont want to move i dont want to gget up i dont want to keep breathing i just want to melt into the rotting pile of flesh that already festers in my insides

[nullnobodynothing]

he was sofucking mad at me

[nullnobodynothing]

i just want the screaming in my fucking brain to stop

[nullnobodynothing]

idk if ive ever wanted xanax as badly as i do rn

or trams

or oxy

or any fucking pill that will make me feel differe nt

[nullnobodynothing]

blood

sex

drugs

[nullnobodynothing]

its a tossup between if theyd actually let me go home if i was bleeding out or if they wouldnt even notice

[nullnobodynothing]

i dont want to be this sad anymore im so tired im so tired of feeling like im already dead im so tired of looking at my life like im a ghost im tired of reaching out and not being able to hold onto anything

i feel like im phasing back and forth through myself. i dont feel lucid

[nullnobodynothing]

i just want to be done now . so bad.

[nullnobodynothing]

i really really really really dont want to exist anymore

[nullnobodynothing]

but it really doesnt matter

[nullnobodynothing]

if i killed myself right now Right Now my mom would find me instead of either of them