obsoletecarelessness

[obsoletecarelessness]

As of Wednesday, April 22, 1:21 am, 2020 this blog is inactive.

You’ll be given my new URL if I want you there.

To anyone else, you don’t need to look here anymore. You’ll be better off not knowing. Thank you for everything.

- Kai

[obsoletecarelessness]

“You can't make people care about you; they either do or they don't.”

[obsoletecarelessness]

Either way, I’m alone.

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[obsoletecarelessness]

[obsoletecarelessness]

snow

a princess of the snow, when i hit the slopes i hit the slopes hard

i love her too much, i must never let down my guard

the lady in white spins me in a dance

the subject already has me in a trance

my hppd got my eyes fucked up

psychedelic vision, what else is up

a line here a dab here i’ll survive the night

for the month of 4/20 is a symbolic sight

lady in white, you won’t control me this time

i left you in the past, bittersweet like a shot of tequila with lime

an old friend for special days

i’m looking through a smoky haze

another one another one my mind chants

slow down, this isn’t my kind of dance

not anymore, i’ve left that ball and chain long ago

a bad seed that i had reaped as well as sew

it’ll be okay, for i have changed

and never again will i be deranged

by the princess of snow, a snow angel on my heart

for at the end of the day, consciousness i will depart

[obsoletecarelessness]

Today’s prompt was “shadow.” Quoth the raven, never more.

[obsoletecarelessness]

Edgar Allan Poe,Alone (1875)

[obsoletecarelessness]

alone

i’ve been feeling more alone than usual. i know i really am, but it just sucks. it really sucks not feeling wanted, just generally. it’s okay though. it’s lonely but it’s okay. maybe it’ll be easier this way eventually

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Who cares about me anyway

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I’m passively suicidal

I think about suicide on a daily basis

And I have a feeling in my body that just screams “I want do die”

But I just never do it

I’m passively suicidal

[obsoletecarelessness]

I don’t care about myself. I know how hard life is. I want to be there for you..

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I’m not good enough.

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I’m sad as fuck again and these tears just won’t come out. So there’s this huge void inside of me.

[obsoletecarelessness]

Depression is not just sadness. Depression is weight that keeps you in bed. Depression can feel empty, like nothing at all. Depression can be unexplainable. Depression keeps yout stuck. Fun can’t fix it. Instead it isolates you from what you love. Depression is an overwhelming numbness.