odviing - Tumblr blog

[odviing]

My muse has hypothermia!! Send ♨️ for their reaction to waking up naked, cuddling your muse for warmth.

Alternatively, send ♨️+ for your muse to have hypothermia, and wake up naked cuddling my muse for warmth.

[odviing]

[odviing]

Send 💥 for your muse to take a serious blow meant for mine.

[odviing]

Quotes from My DND Campaign Sentence Meme (kinda NSFW) Pt. 3

"I'm out of character here, but OH MY GOD BEANS."

"He is bald of head and fat of ass."

"He's legit got a neckbeard."

"What is this, goat piss?" "Yes."

"They bend under his girth."

"I magically play with myself."

"DO THE THING, [name]!"

"That's the fastest I've ever seen someone go from zero to untrusting."

"You feel fairly stealthy."

"I've been fucked by the elements."

"I hit the jello with my magic stick."

"You look into the hole and see John Cena."

"Does your mage hand have a name?" "Cletus."

"Cletus is a little hesitant."

"QUIT YER BELLYACHIN'."

"I found something magic, y'all."

"Burninate it."

"Cletus is holding this stone and my character is just jizzing himself."

"Is your character a southern man?"

"He is whatever my heart desires."

"Oh hell yeah. I want power, like, yeah."

"I say okay to the orb."

"The hand is human. -oid."

"Am I about to become a warlock?"

"If you trick me, I'm chucking you down a well." "...Fair."

"I like this orb."

"The halfling looks at you like, 'aw poor baby'."

"I CARE SO MUCH ABOUT EVERYONE AND IT HURTS."

"You're my favorite."

"I love what you've done with your hair!"

"You're not cute apparently."

"Cletus is making the jack-off motion."

"Just imagine a demon boy ribbiting at a frog."

"We're excellent dude-killing dudes."

"GUNTHER."

[odviing]

Quotes From My DND Campaign Sentence Meme (definitely a bit NSFW) Pt. 2

"I kick you in the dick." "I'm wearing plate armor." "...It hurts."

"You swahp him in the testicles."

"Roll to see if you can still have kids."

"Roll for fertilization."

"I start singing ocean man."

"You and your dick have a +2 armor rating."

"You made me use my spell slot on a magic condom, I hope you're happy."

"Roll for handjob."

"It's a brojob."

"I have bagpipes." "I don't see how that helps."

"Deeper into the caverns you all proceed, narrowly avoiding mold."

"At least my dick works."

"My dick is the tank of this party."

"You do not want to lick my sock."

"I'm Tim, the wizard from Accounts Payable."

"My daughter is at the mall, I gave her my credit card."

"Fuck me, I assumed the king was a man."

"Well apparently [name] are lovers."

"Apparently I've kidnapped Mr Roberts."

"This is not canon."

"My daughter doesn't exist."

"Come on baby, let us go forth." "You're not my real dad."

"Crows. IN SPACE."

"I stand like a dad." "It hits."

"My toupee man bun goes flying."

"I'm gonna beat him to death with my spear."

"DO YOU SPEAK COMMON NOW, MOTHERFUCKER?"

"What would dad do?"

"I heal bloody feather boy."

"What is all this shenanigans."

[odviing]

Random Shit My Theatre Director Has Said -- Sentence Meme

"Once again, [name], you've crystallized my thoughts precisely."

"THAT'S right!"

"Mormons can give blowjobs. It's true."

"My booty is mine and it belongs to me."

"We're all pimples."

(British accent) "Can we take it from 'she got donk'?"

"And that's why I can afford sushi whenever I want it."

"I've never interrupted someone in the middle of washing their hands before, I'm so sorry."

"I think he's intimidated by your ass." (To his own wife)

"FUCK, that's great."

"I had to learn how to give blowjobs."

[Picks up writing desk and just holds it out of excitement]

"You're so tiny but your ferocity makes me fear for my life."

"What did we learn?"

"My wife doesn't like it when I say 'fuck', I've gotta watch my mouth around you guys. But you make it so hard."

"You're not dumb, I'M dumb."

[odviing]

Quotes From My DND Campaign Sentence Meme (may be NSFW)

"That song was shit."

"Try not to pee on anything else."

"I don't tell you where to pee, sister/brother/friend."

"WELCOME MORTAL FOOLS."

"PREPARE TO DIE." "Finally."

"It's really good sperm, it's in my bio."

"Who is this sassy, lost child?"

"You're grounded." "YOu'Re grOuNDed."

"I'm the Arkansas paladin. I say 'yee-haw' when I smite evil."

"Calling it now, that's a cursed coat."

"I'm hoping it's more of a Doctor Strange coat, where it's my friend."

(softly) "Oh no, my lad."

"I've never been more attracted to you."

"Don't make me replace my foot with my rapier."

"Beneath my armor is, like, 15 doberman puppies."

"Can you get your foot off my dick?"

"How big is the gap?" "About seven feet." "And how big is my shield?"

(sadly) "They killed Bobert!"

"Six inches makes all the difference. -Jesus, 1965"

"I'll take it. And I do."

"You died of dysentery."

"Change your alignment to chaotic evil."

"I smack his tushy."

"I wanna play them a lullaby with my tuba."

"I lap up the blood."

(long silence) "I'm inspired."

"I take the ham."

"I feel like cutting off faces is pretty chaotic."

"You're sauntering by with your long coat and piss-covered stilettos."

(to skeletons) "THOSE AREN'T EVEN REAL BONERS."

"Your character is a weird level of kinkiness that I was not prepared for."

(to skeletons) "YOU SHOULD'VE DRANK MORE MILK."

(Waluigi voice) "WAAAHHHH"

"I lap up the bone meal."

"You have a small penis!" "...Okay, it has to make a wisdom save."

"Can I Voltron this situation?"

"There's no kill like overkill."

"Oof ouch bone hurting juice."

"The two cornering you are going to try to turn you into pudding." -dice roll- -sigh- "They both miss."

"You bellyflop the skeleton."

"Your butthole's kinda weird."

"My catchphrase is BUTTMEAT."

[odviing]

Rollin with Olan Sentence Meme

Change pronouns as you see fit!!:

"Welcome to a show about anything and everything, but mainly nothing."

"You can't keep all of the length and get a haircut. That's the point of a haircut."

"That's depressing."

"I would trade you."

"I don't want to trade right now!"

"There's nothing wrong with doing [activity]. It's just the fact that I have to. It's that I don't have a choice."

"He's a freakin' sex icon!"

"He is a gentle giant, but he just has that grimace."

"Dude, heck yeah, man."

"I'm so authentic."

"Cilantro's great. I freaking love cilantro."

"When do you ever see Liam Neeson going to the bathroom?"

"My daughter is missing! I gotta find my keys!"

"I'm just assuming that as a mom, she knows what she's doing."

"What kind of Quasimodo characters are they making these pants for?"

"If you've killed a man, you've given up your right to popcorn."

"Nobody died, but people everywhere were mildly annoyed."

"The ice tastes like butt."

"All orcs gotta have chapped lips."

"I wanted three croutons gently floating on my ranch!!"

"I AM THE OWNER OF MY HOUSE."

"If only all stomachs were that entertaining."

"I seem to be liking married women lately."

"Is this that building with those weird freak people?"

"I think she's eating the face of the person across from her."

"I'm a jewel thief."

"You're like a drool vampire."

"What's it about-- what's about-- what's-- what's it all about?"

"I don't think they make seedless watermelons."

"It's essentially a license to almost kill somebody."

"Is she saying 'pissing the night away'?"

[odviing]

;; let’s fuckin do this