ofcruelties

[ofcruelties]

girls against god florence + the machine / six sleeping at last / o'sister city and colour / almost (sweet music) hozier / anti-curse boygenius / clocks coldplay / falling behind laufey / never grow up taylor swift / stay soft mitski / you're on your own kid taylor swift / francis forever mitski / western wind carly rae jepsen / happiness taylor swift

listen.

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sunset the midnight / boyfriend dove cameron / i didn't just come here to dance carly rae jepsen / that don't impress me much haim / $20 boygenius / clothes off jake shears / fuck up the friendship leah kate / found my friends hayley kiyoko / daddy af slayyyter / how to be a heartbreaker marina and the diamonds / cool girl tove lo / she's so nice pink guy / casanova allie x / i don't want it at all kim petras / this is why i'm hot kailee morgue / pink panther scene queen / blondes peach prc / let's be friends carly rae jepsen / no roots alice merton / number one fan muna

listen.

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kissing lessons lucy dacus / brando lucy dacus / i know the end phoebe bridgers / everywhere, everything noah kahan / phantom rina sawayama / mirrorball taylor swift / not strong enough boygenius / this is me trying taylor swift / the view between villages noah kahan / silk chiffon (electric lady studios) muna / abstract (psychopomp) hozier / snow angel reneé rapp

listen.

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it felt like there was nowhere left to run to, nothing beyond the gates but danger and the remnants of lives they’ll never go back to, but even that knowledge never fully quelled the urge to travel, to skip town and never look back. she’d done it before, escaped the new york qz and gotten this far, but all she’d ended up with were four dead friends and an empty backpack to show for it. so she stayed put, despite the burning in her chest, the tingling in her muscles. she usually made her restlessness someone else’s problem, seeking out someone to irritate or have a bit of fun with, whatever they were receptive too. if she were lucky, often she found both in the same person, and nowadays that tended to be quinn. they were often easy to find and even easier to annoy, a dangerous combination when rowan was bored and actively looking for problems. and so she was delighted to find them perched on the stairs, immediately making herself comfortable a few steps lower, leaning back so she can aim a cocky grin in their direction, ❝ not trying to hide from me, are you ?? cause i’m sure there are much more comfortable spots. ❞

CLOSED STARTER | @ofcruelties + rowan ! where: outside of the motel

before the world went to shit, it was fairly easy to avoid a decision you might regret making. you could go anywhere you wanted— you could hide in your house, skip town if need be. quinn had perfected the art of avoidance as if it were a life skill and not completely irresponsible, and when the dead started rising, this was something they used to help them survive when they flew through qz's and different small communities. this was not something they could use in novac, not when you share a motel with nearly the entire town and you're practically breathing down each others' necks. yes, rowan was a bad decision; quinn clocked her almost the moment they were somewhat settled in this town. like calls to like, mess calls to mess, however the saying goes— and if they were smart, they'd keep it at that one mistake and continue with their life. except, they've never claimed to be smart.

and everytime they claim they will keep their distance, quinn either breaks their resolve or she somehow manages to be behind every corner. tonight, it's the latter— they aren't sure what they expected, sitting on the steps of the motel that leads to the second floor, it was guaranteed someone was going to show up. it just happened to be bad luck that it turned out to be rowan— story of quinn's goddamn life. they move out of the way, hoping that maybe they can keep their head down and she'll just walk right by them, leave them to their own devices. though we've already established their awful track record regarding luck.

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it was hard not to feel tense whenever she left novac, the threat of danger lurking around every corner. especially now that she was paired with a scavenger instead of one of her fellow scouts, not knowing if she could trust the other to fully have her back if they came across any infected. but she’d walked this route herself just a few days prior, so she’d agreed to go out based on the promise of an easy patrol. ❝ nah, nothing that spontaneous, unfortunately. there’s a schedule we follow, making sure to rotate the routes so we cover ground consistently and nowhere gets missed off. ❞ she crouched down to rifle through a cupboard, finding nothing but crockery, ❝ there’s nothing useful in here, let’s head down a floor ?? ❞

status. closed. ( @ofcruelties / rowan ) location. outside of novac.

the surface is cold, the cool metal of the table giving the scavenger a moment of reprieve from the hot weather outside. berlin seemed relaxed, with their arm sliding behind them to catch some of their weight whilst they leaned back: but the scavenger was far from. they'd agreed to pair up with rowan for a brief look around, coming in case the people before them had missed anything. it was unlikely, the path having been walked again and again, but she was hardly what one would call acclimated to the life behind walls. she'd take the chance to leave whenever she could. " so how do you guys decide where to go to next? do you spin a bottle and just go in whatever direction it points to? "

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rowan had never been a particularly patient person. and though she thought this might have gotten worse with the apocalypse, with time feeling more precious and fleeting, she was surprised that the opposite had happened; she learned to approach situations and infected with more stealth and precision, her time in novac mellowing her even further, now she has a roof over her head and the time for yoga and meditation. ❝ that’s your best bet, always have someone to cover your back. ❞ it caused a pang in her chest, to remember the family she’d found in the circus and watched die one by one until she was the only one left, riding into texas alone. ❝ you should try one, i can sign you one out for a bit. i think you might do well with it, you can maintain your distance and stay in stealth. only get close if you have to. ❞

her head continuously nodded, soaking up each and every syllable. maiya was no fool, but her technique certainly needed tightening. if only she could switch her emotional dial down, fight as though it wasn't herself in her body. those flashes of her sisters hit her whenever the battle grew thickest. "i can do that. move quickly, silently, keep myself hidden... it's never a good idea moving on your own, either." she wished mina could be as gentle as rowan was. tough love was welcomed, but her roommate seemed to give for the throat and shake. the raised scar on her bicep was testament to the roughness of her training partner. "i can't say i have. used a bow before. they seem clunky." fingers flexed, savouring the filigree patterning of her knife hilt. she wanted to feel the ooze of their blood, hear the hiss of spores as they fell; in maiya's mind, vengeance took precedence over survival. "but i could try it as a backup, at least. i know i'm good with knives, but i could do with a little more range. some momentum."

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a single eyebrow raised, ❝ how come you’re after a charger then, if you’re so sure you can make a solar powered one ?? ❞ rowan had never been particularly handy, she got by on wit and cunning more than she did actual survival skills, but she was sure it couldn’t be as easy as he was making it sound. ❝ but they’re also pretty abundant. unless we’re talking crystals, i’ve lost interest. ❞

"maybe not. could always make solar powered chargers, if you had the right materials." something his dad taught -- could charge pretty much anything with the sun, given the right conditions and having the right stuff. the idea is near futile, but there's still hope. "dunno. rocks can be pretty useful." mostly for attacking enemies with, but useful all the same. teagan just likes the way they look. the different types and all that. "i mean. not really?" shrugs. "don't think girls would like rocks, much."

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❝ finders keepers though, right ?? ❞ she turned the ipod over in her hands, wondering for a moment who might have left it behind, ❝ maybe i improved their chances, wouldn’t be able to hear anything coming with headphones in. ❞ rowan slipped it back into her back pocket, holding out for a better offer, ❝ ah well, maybe you’ll find something on your next trip out, if i haven’t shifted it yet. bet you’ll head out the same way ?? ❞

“jeez, the poor bastard. i wouldn’t even want to imagine realising i’d left something like that behind.” but, of course, it was finders keepers, especially in times like this, and if some fool was unfortunate enough to leave a working ipod and a functioning charger behind, they deserved to have it be gone by the time they got back for it, if they chose to venture back at all, which most wouldn’t. “nothing worth an ipod and a charger. a few wallets, not with much in - and money’s worth nothing now anyway.”

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rowan groaned, ❝ considering anything to be ‘slightly worn’ this far into the fucking apocalypse seems … generous, at best. ❞ a lot of rowan’s own clothes had been patched up so many times she wasn’t even sure how much of the original material remained. she had never been one for material possessions, but she missed the bright colours she’d once worn, the gaudy sweaters and fun earrings she’d left behind. ❝ have you ever seen him work ?? ‘cause if i’d known drinking all day was an option here i think i’d have way fewer scars. probably sleep better at night too. ❞ she glanced back over her shoulder at him, any pity she might have felt for him completely overshadowed by disgust, ❝ at least a skeleton would be cool. like a fully articulated pigeon ?? i’d love that, it’d have pride of place on my windowsill. but nah, it looked like some sort of roadkill. i know animals don’t get infected, but that thing looked ready to start a whole new outbreak. ❞

Bellamy pursed her lips and . "Oh yeah. I've had everything from 'only slightly worn' underwear - his words not mine - to promises of fresh meat. Fresh raccoon meat, I should say." Following the direction of Rowan's gesture, Bellamy's eyes fell on said man and instantly winced. "Yep, I know blue cheese Bill. He's in here every day." Bellamy sort of felt sorry for him, especially because she was pretty sure his name was Rick. Blue cheese Bill just happened to be what everyone in the bar called him and it had kind of stuck. "Are we talking decaying or full on skeletal pigeon? I'm not sure what's worse."

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rowan stepped further into the stables, reaching to pat the neck of her horse affectionately. she had never really been one for animals, she’d never begged her parents for a pet when she was younger, always considered them more hassle and work than they were worth, but she respected and admired her horse enough that it had become something akin to fondness, or at least as close as she figured she could get. ❝ you’re grand, it’s always been a day around here. ❞ she purposely didn’t ask, never wanting to have to think too deeply about the shit they’d all been through, but most importantly never wanting to take on anyone else’s trauma when she was so busy trying not to process her own. ❝ oh, torin here ?? yeah, he and i go way back. ❞ a rare bought of homesickness had inspired her to give him a strong irish name, ironic when she had so pointedly dropped her own. ❝ i’m glad he gives you no trouble. do you get hazard pay for getting kicked in the face ?? ❞

kaleo  blinks,  his  brain  belatedly  putting  two-and-two  together  as  he  realizes  who  exactly  has  come  to  bother  him.  he  deflates  a  little,  then,  lips  pressing  into  a  tight  line  as  he  looks  back  at  the  horse,  who's  clearly  happier  to  see  her  than  him.   "  got  it,  "    he  mutters  under  his  breath,  setting  his  tools  down  &  tossing  the  rag  in  his  hand  onto  his  workbench.   "  sorry.  i  —  it's  been  a  day. "    he  waves  a  hand  dismissively,  unwilling  to  get  into  the  grit  of  it,  before  moving  to  untether  the  horse  from  his  post.   "  he  yours,  then?  "    he  asks  over  his  shoulder.   "  he's  a  gem,  y'know.  least  fussy  horse  i've  ever  worked  on.  takes  new  shoes  like  a  champ. "

[ofcruelties]

rowan loved lying. not always in a harmful way, but she loved embellishing the truth ( or twisting it entirely ) for the sake of making a story more interesting. it was hard to do so, however, with someone who would easily be able to see through it, another scout who regularly had to trust rowan with her life and vice versa. ❝ maybe it was, i’ve always been the more observant one, ❞ she said with a wink, matching the teasing tone that rian spoke with. it was broken immediately with a laugh, ❝ nah, it was when i went out west this morning, had to fend three runners off to get to it. ❞ rowan considered the proposition; reaching into her pocket for the device so that she could turn it on, ❝ as romantic as it would be to share earbuds, whoever left this behind has shit taste, ❞ she tilted the screen so that rian could see it, ❝ it’s all white american dad music, even by pre-apocalypse standards. we’re better palming it off on someone else for something we’ll actually enjoy. ❞

amusement is clear in every line of rian's expression, head shaking at rowan's words. "on what run was that? if you say it was on one with me, i will have to call it bullshit." a tease that gets offered with a smirk, eyebrow quirking up as dark eyes meet the other scout's. "though, how about you don't trade it and we can both use it? seems like a deal."

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❝ basic rules are all you need to get started. ❞ rowan pulled the pack of cards out of her back pocket, tapping the box against her palm. the corners were worn, even slightly charred, but they were perfectly useable besides. ❝ it's been a while since i've played anyway, i'll be rusty. ❞ card games had been a staple of evenings with the circus troupe, decks borrowed from magicians once they’d been checked over for any trickery. it made her nostalgic for simpler, more hopeful times, though she tried never to dwell on that too much. ❝ homeschooled ?? ❞ rowan winced, ❝ luckily my mam always wanted us out the house as much as possible, so i dodged that bullet. ❞ her head tilted, curiosity piqued, ❝ what kind of science ?? ❞

frigg furrowed her brows at rowan's comment. she wasn't answering her, but frigg did know how to play poker-- based off the numerous books she's read about it. has she actually played? no, no she hasn't. her mother used to say that her dad had a bad poker face. she wasn't sure really what that meant to be quite honest. "i know the basic rules." she admits with a shrug as she shoves her hands in her pockets "i don't think i've ever actually played." she hums as she turns her head towards the table to settle down at. "yeah, i'm boring to be quite honest, i've never really made friends easily growing up, i was homeschooled. it was quite boring. but, i'm excited to play a game of poker, my parents were strange, they were too invested in their science to let me play these types of games. does playing poker count as something you've been wanting to do lately?" she asks oddly mindlessly not even thinking about her original question. this is what happens when frigg speaks too fast for her mind to keep up with.

[ofcruelties]

JODIE COMER Noble Panacea, September 2023

[ofcruelties]

@painendured

— Vladimir Nabokov, Letters to Véra

[ofcruelties]

ayo edebiri & she+they / non binary⸻ i saw astrid akintola coming through the trees. the 26 year old was fleeing from bridgetown, barbados when they came across novac, and have sought salvation within the motel of purgatory. astrid has been in town for four years and has been assigned as a stablehand to keep society running smoothly. no matter what, they will find something to fight for. ⸻ em, she/they, 26, gmt.

ᴄʟɪᴄᴋ ʜᴇʀᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴀsᴛʀɪᴅ's ʙɪᴏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ᴄᴏɴɴᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴs !!

TL;DR : nervous shaky dog in a human form, musician with no survival skills whatsoever, eldest daughter disease, inexplicably afraid of birds.

[ofcruelties]

zion.moreno: 🖤

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❝ ah, but see, if i give you the charger no one will want the ipod. no fuckin' use if they can't charge it. ❞ her eyes go wide, offended, ❝ ...rocks. what am i to you, a crow ?? ❞ sure, she had an emotional attachment to her collection of crystals, but that was different, those served a purpose. ❝ you try that with all the girls ?? ❞ she joked, already over her brief indignation.

oh, now they're talking. finally, something that isn't made solely for survival. "i don't really care 'bout the ipod itself. it's the charger, mostly." shrugs. hands dig into his hoodie pocket to figure out what exactly he has to trade. the only really valuable thing he has is his camera, but that's over his dead body. "i got ---- a rock," pulls one out from his pocket to show. not a bad looking one. "and --- a rock." well, maybe rock collecting is good for something. "if it was possible, you could tumble 'em and polish 'em to make them prettier."