okaytokay369

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Kinich: okay, but at least this is a funny glitch, i don't have to fix it. if a glitch is funny enough, it's a feature, that's how game dev works. it's why they let Gandhi nuke everyone

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elden ring lore explained

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state of the fandom right now

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WE hired this Dreepy to stare at you.

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You're fresh out of college and looking for a job. Everyone is hiring. Nobody who's "hiring" is actually hiring. You finally get a call back from somewhere you barely remember applying to (though the voice on the other end sounds synthesized). You pull up the job listing again real quick. The company name and the fact that the listing is for "Minion" are kind of concerning, but you know what, you've interviewed with enough evil corporations by now, you can handle one wearing its true colors on its sleeve. At this point it's a matter of making rent or moving back in with your parents, and as much as you love your family, you can't imagine spending another summer dealing with your brothers' antics. You agree to the interview.

The man who greets you is an enthusiastic older German(?) man who's either way too into cosplay or just that committed to the bit, judging by the lab coat. He made cookies. The tray of cookies is proffered to you by a ten-foot-tall robotic caricature of a 50s businessman. You take a deep breath to calm yourself. You bite into one of the cookies. It's delicious.

You ask the boss about his business model. "Oh you know, a little of this, a little of that, I bounce from project to project a lot." He mentions that his end goal is becoming the undisputed ruler of the surrounding counties. "Really? Not the whole world?" you ask. "I like to set realistic goals," he replies.

As he gives you the tour of his "evil lair," ingrained instincts are screaming at you to report this guy to some kind of authority figure. You remember the salary. You decide that you can always bust him after getting your first paycheck.

The boss asks when you can start. Caught off guard, you say "tomorrow?". Your boss(?) says he'll see you then.

On the way out, you bump into your stepbrother's girlfriend. Your boss introduces her as his daughter. You both silently agree to sidestep the subject for now and act like this is your first time meeting.

You show up to your first day of work. Your boss is putting the finishing touches on a giant machine that was definitely not there yesterday. You are nonplussed. You ask him what it's for and he launches into a convoluted explanation involving his parents always forcing him to put his shirts on backwards so the tag was in front. You think he should probably talk to a therapist.

Your brothers' exotic pet breaks down the wall. You stare at him. He stares at you. Incredulously, you say his name. "Oh, good, you two already know each other!" your boss says. You mention that you used to live with him. "What? Perry the Platypus, you never mentioned having a roommate."

This is what I like to imagine Candace Flynn's life is like, post P&F.

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monster con is a game of all time

Kaveh: how did i get the ending where i formed a parasocial relationship with an egg

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we heard Ingo & Emmet are popular on tumblr so here's a high res image of the Battle Subway Bosses

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are we not feeling very pious today, brother lionel

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amaranthine once again...

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Current mood

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Childe, baffled: how the fuck am i salvaging this

Scaramouche, disgusted: you need to be put down

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yeah your ship is cool and all but do they have officially released matching wedding rings? did the official twitter account tweet that your ship name tops? did one of them canonically call the other one daddy? is one of them saddled with unnecessary feelings, namely unease and uncertainty thanks to the other? hmm?

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the tactica dlc trailer for context

this edition of my stupid tweets brought to you by p5r and sumi yoshizawa

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THERE IS NO DELTARUNE

THERE IS NO SILKSONG

AND THERE IS NO QUEEN OF ENGLAND

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Reblog to give your followers each their own sword.