oneirocartographer

[oneirocartographer]

absolutely fucking insane that grinder wants you to pay $24 a week to see who is looking at your account and sending taps. literally i just wanna know who's looking at the evil wizard

[oneirocartographer]

as promised, Shadow wears a cutesy dress: the comic :3

(Don't pay too much attention to the dialogue or story here, this comic was just an excuse to draw Shadow in a dress LOL)

up next is. uhhh... what did Sonic do now? who knows!

[oneirocartographer]

attention this is your captain speaking chag sameach pesach to all celebrating and a reminder do not open the airlock to greet elijah the vulcan rabbinic council ruled that opening the door to the room where the seder is occurring is sufficient elijah can get on a starship just fine himself he just likes to be personally invited in to your seder we dont need another incident like last year thank you

[oneirocartographer]

started reading dream of the red chamber

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cracking myself up thinking about the movement towards simplified forms in cave paintings

[oneirocartographer]

[oneirocartographer]

don't you love the thrill of the chase?

[oneirocartographer]

[AU where Jon Bois is in Universal Century]

"Zeon calls a meeting, and while the meeting was behind closed doors and the minutes are classified, but I'm pretty sure even if we had them, they'd just read the word "GUNDAM' underlined a couple times for emphasis."

"I mean, what do you even do about this thing? You can't just shoot him, that suit moves faster than anything you've got. And even if you land a hit, that armor means you basically did nothing. You might as well be writing Amuro a letter and hoping he gives himself a paper cut.

"Well, what about tactics? Well, we tried that. Turns out [Camera moves to graph used earlier in the video.] the kid's the kind of person who uses his shield as a projectile weapon. Can't plan around that.

[camera zooms out slowly, starts spinning.]

"So, the greatest military minds of Zeon are all sitting at a conference table. And one by one they're all realizing that this 14 year old has... basically made their military strategy devolve into, making a wish and hoping it comes true.

"Well, if that's all you've got, then... I think I might know where to find a shooting star."

[Jazziest synth you've ever heard in your life]

[picture of Char appears onscreen]

[Alex Rubenstein voiceover kicks in]

"Char Aznable needs no introduction. Better known as The Red Comet, which is a nickname so good, you always kinda thought that he couldn't live up to it. But live up he did."

[oneirocartographer]

ID: a star trek screenshot of data saying, "the irish unification of 2024," with the words "there is still time, never give up" edited over it. /end ID

[oneirocartographer]

My conduct this year landed me on Santa Claus's fabled and controversial "Kill-at-all-Costs" List. Turns out the reason the big man and his people don't exercise that option more often is that they really aren't good at following through on it. Well outside their core competency. He's delegated to the elves, and they've got this ingrained assembly-line mindset that doesn't translate at all to the adaptable and fluid mindset needed for siege breaking. They just haven't adjusted their playbook at all from when they're doing rote deliveries. Armed Elves have been rappelling down my chimney one at a time into the roaring fire I've kept going nonstop for the last week. They haven't even thought to try my front door yet. Whole house smells like peppermint, which it turns out is what burnt elf meat smells like. Thought I was being super clever putting cyanide-laced almond milk out with the cookies as a last line of defense, but none of them have made it even the scant few feet to the side table where that's sitting. At the rate things are going the real danger is that I'm gonna forget what I did with that and accidentally drink it myself while I'm watching the show

[oneirocartographer]

and don’t you ever forget it

[oneirocartographer]

SHAPE HELL

Yup.

[oneirocartographer]

i think if i were a musical artist who made indie rock music and spotify accused me of being "goblincore banjo folk punk" i would start a class action lawsuit

[oneirocartographer]

you probably thought today was a normal Monday. nooooope. strong as fuck ice mummy again, sorry.

[oneirocartographer]

i walk into the literature convention wearing a shirt that says ask me about the uniquely complex conditions of live improvisation, limitation of expression by narrative and physical constraints, meta-awareness of a specific audience, video editing/framing choices, and amateur enthusiast storytelling that contribute to virtual improv roleplay* being a fascinating nascent artform that is uniquely suited to telling stories that cannot be told in any other format and everyone cheers & claps & whoops & hollers and then they read the smaller text saying *especially within Minecraft builds, maps, servers, streams, and videos and then everyone boos & yells & shoots me with lasers and guns & blows me up with grenades & hits me with 2x4s

[oneirocartographer]

honestly yeah, fiber arts is magic. you cast spell of warm gloves, spell of nice hat, spell of stuffed animal.

material component: yarn

wand: single hooked wand or double pointed wands, depending on caster's preference

mechanical component: specific motions repeated in a particular pattern

time component: a while

look seriously the first step in a knitting recipe is "cast on", and then it's a bunch of letters and numbers incomprehensible to anyone not versed in the arcane art. that's a spellbook. yes it's a book of knitting patterns but also. it's a spell book.

[oneirocartographer]

happy october