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'amoeba' etho...... * ᵃᵏᵃ ᵐʸ ᶠʳᶦᵉⁿᵈ ˢᵃᶦᵈ ᵗʰᵉ ᵇᵘᶦˡᵈ ˡᵒᵒᵏᵉᵈ ˡᶦᵏᵉ ᵃⁿ ᵃᵐᵒᵉᵇᵃ ᶦᵐ ˡᵒᵒˢᶦⁿᵍ ᵐʸ ᵐᶦⁿᵈ

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K商店街にて

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desmond does the roll thing

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AMAZING.

ETHO IS SO GOOD AND FUNNY AND COOL

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PERMITS!!!!!

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Everyone is all up in arms about what kind of energy source will power the cities of tomorrow. Is it natural gas, the invisible menace that leaks out of shitty welds? Could it be nuclear energy, the thing that makes cool-looking cooling towers and rocks you're not allowed to touch? Or could it be simply harnessing the power of the sun and sticking them into a bank of batteries?

If you ask my local recycling depot, which is stuffed to the absolute gills with scrapped solar panels, the answer is "however many of these things you can carry." And since the power had been cut off at my place ever since my landlord didn't come back from that vacation, it's my answer, too.

Solar companies have been going out of business in my area, claiming that there are unforeseen problems to be solved in the "actually installing solar panels on customer homes" challenge. The venture capitalists who control them have basically decided that any obstacle at all is too many obstacles, and shut the companies down rather than spend five minutes trying to think of a solution, as you do when you have no useful value to society.

It didn't take me long to put these things on top of my house. Turns out that the bolts you need to mount them with are basically the same as the ones I'd been smuggling out of the Pick N Pull in my pockets for the last few years. Something new called "met-ric." A couple spritzes of shoplifted Windex later to clean up the cells, and we were making enough electricity to cook any squirrel that was stupid enough to climb onto my roof.

At first, everything was going great. I could now microwave burritos, and probably other kinds of things if you labour under the pointless delusion that there are any other things to eat that are better than a burrito. Then the sun went down, because it was night. Now having been cruelly denied the thing I only just recently became accustomed to, I began to freak out.

That's when it hit me. Batteries were the answer. Energy storage.

Thanks to the local Wal-Mart and their incredibly lax loss-prevention department, I now have electricity 24 hours a day. All I had to do was shoplift enough flashlights, AA batteries, and duct tape to make it through the night. Sure, it's a pain crawling up there every evening to tape the flashlights onto the panels and make sure they have fresh batteries, but to be honest I would be up here every night trying to knock all the charred wildlife off the wires anyway. Don't you rodent bastards know that I'm trying to save the environment up here?

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why is it every time I’m in a revolving door with a man they’re fucking GUNNING IT like we get it man you’re super duper strong I have small legs tho and am gonna get run over by the door chill

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she laughed, and seemed almost surprised by it. he briefly wondered if maybe she hadn't laughed in a long time - if maybe she'd believed she'd forgotten how to.

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omg so good

Ahhh dhngeon.... Posting

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Hehehe

more irl etho lore from cleo’s stream on 01/04/24

he eats one exact same meal every single day

it’s a sandwich that takes him ten minutes to prepare

it’s a foot-long baguette,

with provolone cheese,

hungarian salami (not imported),

lettuce, tomatoes,

salt and pepper,

and vinegar-based dressing (balsamic)

he washes it down with coffee. when questioned he says it’s the regular kind

none of the above info might be true and he’s just making it up

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THIS EXPLAINS EVERYTHING

I HAVE REALIZED SOMETHING.

So. For people who are not Ethoslab watchers, in his most recent episode he showed off these beautiful statues Joel supposedly made of Etho in front of his house.

I figured Joel built them, and it seems Etho did too, because he sent Joel a message via mail about them.

This note... honestly surprised me a bit? I didn't think much of it at first, but the tone of it felt out of place. Obviously these two have this ongoing bit of being obsessed with each other, and they've done nothing recently but yes-and to the sun about it. This note seems to almost shut this bit down, saying "this bit hasn't gone too far yet, because I'm showing this on camera, but it's getting there." Which is a possible explanation for this note! But considering all they've done recently it feels very sudden.

And then. Joel claimed to not have built the statues. "Oh," I thought. "Joel is claiming not to have built the statues because he doesn't want to seem obsessed." Makes sense. Or maybe he *didn't* build the statues and someone is pranking them. That also makes sense.

But it was only when watching Joel talk about it on Impulse's stream, when I heard Joel say "honestly, I think Etho might have done it," that it clicked.

Oh.

This motherfucker.

He 100% did. That's why the message is so weird. Ethoslab built statues of himself outside Joel's base, messaged him via mail saying "that's kinda weird bro" and then DIDN'T EVER REVEAL THAT HE BUILT THEM. Oh my god THIS MAN...

From Etho's audience's perspective it just looks like Joel was continuing being obsessed with Etho, as usual, just another example in a long list. But *Joel* knows he didn't do that and *Etho* knows Joel will figure out who did. This mischievous motherfucker. Oh my godddd I hate them. Listening to him read back the note with that little smile in his voice. I am unwell. Why are they LIKE this

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I love being an ethogirl and a gemboy! Gemstie hehehe

so I heard somewhere that we're calling the geminitay fans gemboys now?

...gemboy kinda sounds like-*gunshot*

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AAAAAAA THATS SO GOOD

I feel like Stress would be so cute in ur style :D

i'm not super familiar with her content (yet) but she seems so lovely and i love her energy and her minecraft skin so gkfjdkgj here's my attempt :D

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It's my 6 year anniversary on Tumblr... Somehow ..

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I want to give u a hug, u look so squishy and so nice and positive! May I gib hug?

hi i super love hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!