parlorjokes

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ᴅᴀᴘᴘᴇʀ ᴅᴡᴀʀғs

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freshman to junior year

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Reblog Fat Spell

Your fate is sealed. With each reblog you will grow fatter. There is no reversal. Caution to those who are unsure. DO YOU WANT TO BECOME A SUPERCHUB HOG….well then reblog to cast and never go back.

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Reblog this to gain 100 pounds

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Reblog if I can leave you a sexually uncomfortable message.

If you can’t post it, I win.

May as well? I’ll post anything I get sent so xD

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Moment of silence for all of the kids that will be reaped for this year’s Hunger Games.

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I CAN'T

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Good Parenting: Exhibit 1 (overheard at work today)

6-year old: Mommy, why is that man dressed like a lady?

Mother: That is a lady. She was just born with the wrong body.

6-year old: How did that happen?

Mother: Nobody really knows. But she's working to fix it, and that's what's important.

6-year old: Okay! *runs up to obviously self-conscious woman*

6-year old: Hey! Miss!

Lady: ...yes?

6-year old: You look really pretty in your skirt!

Lady: Thank you!

*Kid skips back to her mom, and literally everyone in the vicinity smiles*

While cute, I doubt this happened.

Sorry, internet

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Minimalist Pokemon Starters

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flaming slow motion tennis

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you don’t even have to name the movie. everyone already knows.

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Hot Fuss singles (2004 - 2005)