Hello! I am too tired to come up with anything clever here. She/her. icon by the amazing cheasegary
Last active 60 minutes ago
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Text
why does the "pour milk on your eyes for tear gas exposure" myth pop up like clockwork every time...please do not do that please only do eye flushes with water. please please please
14K notes
·
View notes
Text
#my lockscreen is my baby daughter so like - pretty good#ADVOCATE FOR YOURSELF#your problems are everybody’s problems!#don’t know what to do? try your best with your full ability and then run to mama or dada to fix it#all good#her daddy tells her she’s perfect 15 times a day her advice will be insane
43K notes
·
View notes
Text
“i asked chatgpt—”
well i asked the kind old friar and he told me to fake my death. immediately
276 notes
·
View notes
Text
Shoutout to Dick Van Dyke for being a cis dude whose parents gave him a drag king name for some reason
146K notes
·
View notes
Text
it was a stroke of genius to give James T Kirk a bitchy flip phone in the 60's, truly amazing to watch him slam it shut like a pissed off socialite girl in 2000's teen shows
58K notes
·
View notes
Text
native queers I love you 2Spirit fags and dykes I love you indigenous genderqueer people I love you third gender people I love you māhū I love you ahhhhhhhh
17K notes
·
View notes
Text
me, eating a pile of nuts, cheese, and apple: mmmm tasty
the medieval peasant in my head watching me eat: thou knowst what would MAKETH this meal? dried fruits.
me, getting out the raisins: god damn, etheldred, you are SO right
the medieval peasant in my head: yet thou art still not heeding mine words regarding the blasphemy
76K notes
·
View notes
Text
it’s 2028. trump is dead. elon is dead. zuckerberg is dead bezos is dead they’re all dead
106K notes
·
View notes
Text
british towns will be called Fuckmouth or whatever and people will just go with it
74K notes
·
View notes
Text
Average 2020s movie being "too political": girl power! quick background kiss between two gay extras! one single black guy!
Average "non-political" 70s movie: the government is hiding a global conspiracy that is warming the planet and will kill us all and also the cops are evil
29K notes
·
View notes
Text
I’m at my dog sitting job in a pretty old countryside farm and the lady who does the cleaning up here told me this morning that there are old tunnels (now closed up) running from the house to the church (1km) and I did not want to know that
290K notes
·
View notes