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Let’s be clear about one thing: this is fucking @Madonna.

She’s the best selling female recording artist of all time, the greatest solo touring artist in history, the most photographed woman ever, the most successful female artist in the American charts, UK charts, and the female recording artist with the most #1 hits around the world. She also is the richest self-made female recording artist of all time and, to this day, she is described as “the star to the stars” (a quick look on who comments, “fan-girls,” and “stans” her on Instagram confirms that).

Madonna just released a new single, #Medellin, which quickly went to the #1 position in several countries around the world (being #1 in Europe, #2 worldwide, and peaking at #6 in the American iTunes)—a feat that has never been accomplished by a female singer at her age.

For those entitled fans who love to complain, I make a suggestion: be grateful she’s still around. She’s definitely not making music for fame or money (she has plenty of both), she is making the music she wants to make. She’s having fun. She’s being creative.

Everyone seems to know what is best for Madonna (and I too, sometimes, fall into that trap), but we do not. Let the woman have her fun and give us what SHE wants to give us.

Stop acting like she HAS to give us another “Like a Prayer,” or “Ray of Light,” or even “Confessions on a Dance Floor.” Unlike all her contemporaries, Madonna is neither artistically nor physically dead. She’s not trying to recreate her past hits by producing the same kind of music. She’s not a Vegas act resting on her laurels. These are commendable qualities, not defects.

And one more thing: please, stop acting like you know what she has in store for us. We have heard ONE song from an album being described as a “global futuristic” and “the first of its kind.”

I am so happy she’s back and that she’s already rehearsing for a series of performances.

Love her or leave her, she’s never going to stop.

Now, fast-forward to 2019 and one, two, cha, cha, cha.

Do not slow down, mami.

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On this day, July 27, 1983, the #QueenOfPop released her first album, the homonymous and cool “Madonna.”

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Not many people Know this, but initially, @Madonna’s debut album was supposed to be named “Lucky Star.” In fact, #LuckyStar had already been pressed/printed and was going in a very different visual direction than the final project.

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Even though both artworks look great, “Lucky Star” visually introduced the singer to the world as a #stunning and #sweet girl, whereas #Madonna was instantly #iconic, #edgy, and #cool - which IMO translated her personality and vibe as an artist more accurately.

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Initially considered a “dance album,” the songs in “Madonna” had so much influence in pop culture that, today, we listen to it and call it pure and brilliant pop music. In other words: Madonna defined our notion of #PopMusic since the very beginning of her career.

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In September 1985, the album was reissued under the name “Madonna: The First Album” and gained a different art work again.

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Master Class

Let’s start by stating the obvious: Beyonce is NOT an underdog. Beyonce is NOT an oppressed member of society. In fact, Beyonce does not share with other African Americans the same struggles they do. So pretending she is “one of them” culturally or represents them culturally, or that she has the same place in society as other African Americans is pure ignorance.

It is also ignorance when black people see offense when and where there is none. Case in point, Madonna’s cheeky instagram post about Beyonce and her husband learning from her. The avalanche of criticism Madonna got is ridiculous and disproportional with what she actually intended to express. Are people going to deny Madonna’s influence in pop culture now?

Madonna, as a matter of fact, should be the first name in mind when anyone thinks of popular music being regarded as an art form. The woman created the landscape for contemporary musicians to express themselves and be regarded as “real artists.”

But then, Madonna is white and “old,” and bashing her for whatever reason is now in. But what these haters have forgotten (or are trying to forget) is that only Madonna can teach a master class on this subject. No other pop artist alive has done it better than Madonna. Acknowledging it does not hurt. Beyonce herself has admitted to being inspired by Madonna in several occasions. And even if she hadn’t acknowledged it, anyone with half a working brain would be able to see it by looking at their work. Without Madonna, Beyonce’s shows would not be the same, Beyonce’s videos would not be the same, Beyonce’s performances would not be the same. Madonna, literally, invented the modern age pop artist model. A lot of the criticism Madonna got attacked her for using the word “master” and people accused her of being racist. The first thing I have to say about this: do people REALLY think Madonna was being racist? One Beyonce fan told me “everyone knows the word ‘master’ refers to when slaves had to call their white owner ‘master’.” Mmmm... not really. Everyone will THINK that if you claim that’s what Madonna intended to say.

What everyone actually knows, is that the word “master” refers to someone with an advanced degree of knowledge and expertise in an area -- and no one in sound mind can say Madonna is not a master in pop culture. The interesting thing about Madonna’s post is that is actually refers to a famous saying “ the student becomes the master,” which should be taken as a compliment. Those students were learning from the master to one day become the masters. It’s simple, it’s cheeky, it’s endearing.

But, no, we live in an era where black people are allowed to victimize themselves in every circumstance. So another Beyonce fan told me on Instagram that no white person should ever use the word “master” near a black person. Tell that to all the black people who will gladly be in Master Chef!

Now-a-days, we focus more on the perception of things than on what they actually mean, and because of that, anyone who wants to play the victim card, gets ahead. Evidently, Madonna did not mean to offend anyone, yet, people felt offended by it, so it is Madonna’s fault. The logic behind it (and you will see many comments like this on Madonna’s Instagram) is: “I know you didn’t mean to offend anyone, but I felt offended anyway. So, please, apologize.” The problem is, this kind of rationale is only accepted if you are pulling the race card. “I am black and I felt offended, so you must apologize.” Well, I am deeply offended when people use their race to take advantage of others and the Madonna bashing in this case is deeply offensive. All these people must apologize then, because they made me feel offended, regardless of their intentions. Oh, I get it. This “me” offended is only valid if "me” equals black.

If this is not an example of racism, I do not know what is.

African Americans struggle with real issues every single day. But as long as they continue picking fights with everyone for no reason, no one will actually pay attention to the REAL issues at hand. We do not live in a day and age where the old school media controls pop culture. In fact, it is the other way around. Self-made content for social media is what dictates the zeitgeist now. If black community leaders focused their attention to producing AND consuming content that benefits their agenda and celebrated their culture, they wouldn’t need to pick fights with people who actually celebrate black culture (like Madonna has always done).

I cannot stand Kanye West, but he was absolutely right when he talked about “cultural slavery” (not physical slavery). We actually live in an era where we have the absolute power to empower who we want to. Minority groups do not have to watch “white made” TV or films anymore. There is content being made by every walks of life everywhere - why don't they support them then? Madonna could have easily stayed in her “white” lane like most female white artists do. But no, she decided to give a voice to minorities (gay, black, latinos) in an era when they did not have the same access to the mainstream media as today. Madonna’s work with minorities have always been respectful and appreciative; she has always shown apperception of the gay, latino and black communities. When she did Vogue, she pulled out members of the voguing scene, hired them as choreographers and stars of her video and tour. Today, it’s “cool” to call it “appropriation,” even though it clearly was appreciation and apperception. Differently from Madonna, when Beyonce copied Bob Fosse’s choreography for “Single Ladies,” she put other black dancers by her side and presented it as an original idea to the black community. On the same note, no one dares accuse “half breed” Cher of doing the same with Native American communities. 

Finally, here is what makes this whole thing even more ridiculous: African Americans and the music created by them have been the main force in mainstream music since the 90s.  The music business in the USA has been run by black artists for about 20 years now. In that sense, Beyonce is the oppressor. In that sense, she is culturally appropriating white people’s culture and presenting it to the black community as her own. 

And for those members of her fan base who told me “a white woman never taught Beyonce anything” in response to Madonna’s instagram post, here are some of examples of Beyonce, the “Queen B,” learning a thing or two from white people:

Here, Beyonce (not an underdog, and not being forced by white men to create this video) copies three white ladies doing a choreography created by whiter-than-white choreographer Bob Fosse. 

Here, Beyonce (who is not an oppressed underdog), copies Kylie Minogue’s fembot in one of her performances. But hey, Beyonce fans still claim she was “never inspired by a white artist.” 

Here, stills from Beyonce’s “Haunted” video which is stylistically the same as Madonna’s Justify My Love. Even the narrative is the same (except that good, old, boring Beyonce did not create any controversy with her video).  “Haunted” also borrow’s from Madonna’s Guy Bourdin-inspired video for Hollywood. Guy Bourdin was also white. So for those still claiming “no white artist ever inspired Beyonce...” try a new one. 

I mean, let’s be honest... Beyonce even copied Madonna’s promotional posters for the Re-Invention Tour to promote her Mrs. Carter Tour... she even photoshopped herself to look as white as Madonna. And the “beyhive” claims Madonna and no other “white artist” inspired her? Come on, folks... you can’t erase history.  

And to sum it up:

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No one else in pop culture has created as many #iconic moments as Madonna has consistently done for 35 years. Since 1983, #Madonna has shocked, entertained, and pushed the boundaries of popular culture with talent, beauty, and originality. Last night, at the Met Gala 2018, Madonna showed the world why she is the biggest star in music. It only took her about seven minutes to wow a star-studded crowd with a beautiful musical performance and remind the world that no one does it better than Madonna. Back in the 1980s, Madonna was already dubbed “the star to the stars,” and last night was another evidence of that. The Queen of Pop will soon release a new album. She will soon turn 60. A lot has changed in this world and in her life in the past 35 years, but one thing: Madonna still is the biggest pop artist to ever walk this Earth. Long live the Queen.

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20th anniversary.

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20 years of RAY OF LIGHT.

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Did you know that Academy Award nominee Timothée Chalamet, star of CALL ME BY YOUR NAME, used to date Lola Leon when they were in high school together?

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This underrated album was released today, October 25th, 23 years ago. #BedtimeStories is one of #Madonna’s best albums, in my opinion; it is eclectic and versatile, yet coherent and well put together. In fact, despite all the hits the queen created in the 80s, I believe her studio albums from the 90s (all of them) showcase her brilliance as a songwriter and producer like no other decade in her career. Long live the #QueenOfPop!

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Madonna’s trendsetting TRUTH OR DARE (IN BED WITH MADONNA in some countries) came out nine years after her debut. It became the highest grossing documentary film in history at that point in time. Interestingly enough, her wannabe, Lady Gaga, waited nine years to release her documentary. Coincidence? Nah! Bish is always copying Madonna’s career moves. The difference is that M was at the peak of her career, whereas the wannabe is at her lowest point so far.

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We have been saying this FOR MONTHS:

Lady Gaga’s European tour has thousands and thousands of tickets available.

What does she do then?

Claims to be sick to postpone ONLY the European dates until next year (2018).

Meanwhile, the second leg of her US tour will continue as planned for the rest of this year. Interesting, right?

Well, it makes sense: when you need more time to sell more tickets, you just postpone those shows, right? Not the entire tour.

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GAGA LIED TO BRAZILIAN FANS

Yesterday, Lady Gaga canceled her show in Brazil, ONE DAY BEFORE her performance. 

You would think that it was a great disappointment not only to her fans but also to her crew (technicians, band, road assistants, etc.), after all, 9 hours on a plane, setting up a stage and all the work involved in getting ready for an artist’s  perfor... oh wait! That never happened. The disappointment here is only on the “fan” part. 

Lady Gaga’s crew flew to Europe yesterday (the day she canceled her Brazilian show) from the USA to get ready for the European leg of the FlopAnne tour. And worse: THEY KNEW IT SINCE LAST WEEK!

This image was taken from the Facebook account of a member of the #JoanneWorldTour crew (interestingly enough, this person also worked on the #MDNATour):

Yesterday, September 14, this crew member was flying from New York to Amsterdam saying "Time for the European leg. See you again in 7 weeks America." You would think her crew would be in Brazil already (the show was scheduled for today, September 15). You don’t think they would just show up on the day of the show, build her stage on the day of the show, and move on with the tour, do you?

But it gets worse: THE SAME CREW MEMBER stated, last week, on September 7th, that they had "two more shows after [Toronto]. Then off to Europe." This went unnoticed until Gaga canceled her show in Brazil one day before her performance. Now it was all clear: they all knew the Brazilian show was never going to happened since LAST WEEK. So why did Gaga wait until last minute to cancel the show? The fact that no one from her crew was in Brazil is proof that it is all a scam. 

Needless to say, Joanne's show in Brazil would be THE ONLY ONE in South America, Gaga would be losing money flying her crew and stage down there for just one concert. So they made the executive decision to cancel the one show in South America to get ready for the European leg instead.

[Fans crying outside the venue after the cancelation of the show]

I'm sure they hoped to add more shows, but there was no demand for Joanne there, so mother monster canceled it the day before and sent cookies (really) to the fans who had been camping in line for her show in Rock in Rio for a month. I hope they tasted good.

Click here to see videos and pictures of desperate little monsters crying over a singer who just doesn’t give a shit about them. It’s in Portuguese, but images are worth a thousand words.

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HAS BEEN MENTIONS MADONNA AGAIN

Another day, another desperate has been using Madonna for promotion. Quick reminder: the ONLY (few) times the Queen of Pop ever mentioned Gaga in the media, she was ASKED about her and her undeniable, blatant copying of her work! But when will this bish, Lady Garbage, stop riding on Madonna's coattails? 

When Lady "Joanne" Gaga isn't copying Madonna's music, or videos, or fashion, or career moves, she is talking about her and using it as promo. By the way, what disease is she claiming she has now? She's at her doctor's getting facial injections for "pains on" her face. I guess it hurts being this ugly.

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In need of FREE TICKETS to Lady Gaga's JOKEanne show? Verizon is giving away thousands of them!

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How old does this THING claim IT is again?

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FLOPPING IN SAN FRANCISCO

“If you’re going to San Francisco…" Well Gaga did, but nobody else went, though.

Notice how, while Lady Joanne was ON stage, you can see an ample green turf behind those guys:

And what about the big empty space next to her stage? 

Bish thinks she can pull off stadium shows in the US… wake up Lady Gaga, you’re no Taylor Swift or Beyonce! You’re a flop!