piercethelenn - Tumblr blog

[piercethelenn]

idk if anyone will see this, but this is a goodbye for now💞

[piercethelenn]

🌛❝Even When I'm Not With You.❞

ㅤ

Lee Heeseung

Based on the song by Pierce The Veil

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ㅤ► Pairing: Idol! Heeseung x Fem! reader.

ㅤ► Genre: Fluff without plot and a lil angst, just thoughts. Established relationship.

ㅤ► Synopsis:

There are no rules for love, and at the end of the day, you and Heeseung are the ones to decide what happiness means for both of you.

ㅤ► Warnings: Mentions of exhaustion and overworking.

ㅤ► Word count: 1,2k.

ㅤ

What is love besides

two souls trying to heal each other?

Your ears perk up at the sound of the door opening, making you jump off your seat and head downstairs with excitement.

You give Heeseung no time to react as your arms engulf his neck in a tight hug, making him drop the plastic bag he was carrying to reciprocate your overwhelming display of affection, holding you by the waist and resting his head on your shoulder, visibly more relaxed after taking in the scent of your shampoo.

This was the first time in two weeks where you could feel his warm skin in contact with yours, and there was no time to waste for you to have him close.

“I missed you so much” he whispers, tightening his hold even more to let you know how much he means every word.

“I missed you too, but you’re finally here!” you whisper back, feeling his hands softly grip the fabric of your clothes and a loving kiss being placed on your cheek.

There was a point, way back when your relationship had just timidly blossomed against all odds, where your boyfriend had started to develop this habit of making everything in his life have to do something with you; He could see your face in every mirror, hear your voice hidden in every song, find himself thinking about how you would react after seeing him practice… He had truly missed you so much.

You would laugh it off every time he told you about this embarrassing side of himself, reassuring him that he was still getting used to your barely four-month-old relationship when in reality you felt the same.

It is not as if Heeseung and you were novices in the mysterious arts of dating, but even if it seems like a cheap cliche, he feels so much different from the rest; he was the first person to ever make your cold and empty house feel like a proper home, a sensation you had long forgotten after moving out of your parent’s house.

Your hands were now resting on the sides of his face, holding him dearly and examining his features under the dim light of the living room; he looked just as exhausted as you were, it had been like this every single day from the very moment you saw him for the first time, but the glow in his eyes that appeared every time you were in his line of sight had never faded.

Given his line of work, and your duties as a college student, both of you spent almost three-quarters of the day focused on your respective responsibilities, making it difficult to spend time together before the clock hit midnight; And yes, in all these months of dating, the bitter truth was that you had barely done any proper couple activities, like those pictured in movies and books were romance is over-produced, and the main characters must go through certain, pre-determined steps before people around them start acknowledging their relationship as a real one, because people are just nosy like that.

The reality is that neither Heeseung nor you felt the need to rush things, because the lack of time made slow and steady steps feel way more comfortable for both of you. There was no need to follow rules set by a society with a messed-up conception of love to feel like your relationship was worth the last drops of energy left in both of you after hours of hard work.

The last thing you needed was to feel regret for “wasting your youth”, not enjoying your relationship the way others wanted you to, and on Heeseung’s end, he had enough of listening to people scold him for not being the Perfect Boyfriend, when in your eyes, he was more than enough to make you feel like the luckiest girl alive; Love is not a competition, as those people want to make it seem to be, but even if it was, you think that you had finally won after becoming his girlfriend on that spring evening when you had mustered up your courage to ask him out.

You did not need him to buy you expensive gifts or take you to romcom-like dates, all you wanted from him was his unwavering warmth, expressed through his good morning texts, his good night kisses, his shoulder that was always there for you to lean on, and the food he always brought home for dinner; like the one that rested on the floor right at this moment.

You freed yourself from his embrace to pick up the plastic bag and made your way to the kitchen followed close behind by your tired boyfriend, who yawned before lazily taking two sets of plates and utensils from the small cabinet, and then heading back to the living room to place them on the table.

Heeseung was also content with the current state of your relationship since both of you were career-oriented people who perfectly understood each other’s priorities and concerns; neither of you would ever complain to the other for not receiving enough attention or time, because you knew that both of you were just trying your best to make your dreams a reality. He did not need you to be the cheerleader girlfriend type that would visit him every practice session to encourage him, he was more than satisfied with having you listen to his three-in-the-morning-rants and massaging his scalp to help him relax after a day of exhausting training.

After dinner was set and a chapter of the show you had left the night prior was playing on the tv, Heeseung and you were enjoying your Couple Time in a comforting silence, as you had done so for the past months, and as you planned to do so for as long as time would allow it.

It did not matter if you could only spend a few hours together and had to sacrifice your sleep schedules for a few more minutes of company.

You didn't mind not being able to see Heeseung for days because of his promotions and overseas schedules, even if it meant you would have to sleep alone through plenty of nights and fill the silent room with your cries when life feels too overwhelming, but he is not there to caress your hair and sing you a lullaby.

He didn't mind not living the perfect, Disney-like romance that he had pictured when he was younger, even if it meant he would have to endure a lot of pressure all alone and blame himself for not being perfect when you are not by his side to remind him how loved he is.

Your relationship was not ideal, simply because there is no such thing, but regardless of that, both of you were happy with what you had, because…

Even when you can’t see him, you still feel him

Even when he can’t touch you, he pretends to

Even when you think you hate him, you still love him

Even when he can’t kiss you, he still waits to

Even when you’re not with him, you’re still with him

And even when he’s not with you, he’s still with you.

ㅤ

EnVeil series🌛Main masterlist

A/N: This song came out like three days ago and I haven't stopped thinking about it ever since, so yeah... this happened😎

[piercethelenn]

thinking about the occult club rn

[piercethelenn]

♕ Tres: Wrong smau, donkey.

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♔Synopsis:

Stalemate, also known as the last resort for the losing player in a chess match; if performed correctly, can lead the game to end in a draw instead of succumbing to your opponent. This was the most valuable lesson Jake had learned from his girlfriend, Y/N, and never in his life had he imagined how her words could take a totally different meaning.

Previous ♕ Masterlist ♕ Next

A/N: I have no clue what the last three panels are🧍‍♀️

[piercethelenn]

my acc is fixed im crying

[piercethelenn]

happy new year<3

[piercethelenn]

this blog got shadowbanned a few weeks ago and i sill haven't been able to fix it so im thinking of moving to a new one🥲

[piercethelenn]

🎄Celebrating Christmas in Summer with Enhypen!

❥ Pairing: Non idol! Enhypen ot7 x Fem! Reader

❥ Genre: A shit ton of fluff and a poor attempt at comedy. Established relationship.

❥ Contents: Just my thoughts about the boys celebrating Christmas in the southern hemisphere<3 Made in bulleted list format.

❥ Word count: tba

❥ Warnings: Light swearing, kissing😙 Not proofread

Jungwon has always wanted to go to a themed waterpark-hotel

And what's better than a christmas themed waterpark to spend the holidays?

The place was decorated with adorned palm trees, and there was this cool poster of santa claus surfing at the entrance

You had barely crossed the door but both of you were full of excitement already!!

You decided to stay for the night since the reception lady told you there was going to be a surprise after the clock hit midnight

As soon as you left your bags in the room, with no time to unpack, both of you made your way to the pool

Holding hands amidst the hot weather because Jungwon is a clingy baby😣

You take turns to apply sunscreen on each other and you're ready to go!

The place is surrounded by a lively atmosphere, it's full of kids and not-so-kids having fun equally

Jungwon is drawn to this particularly high slide and drags you there by the hand

"Y/N!! Let's go to that one first!"

"I'm not sure..."

"Don't worry, I'll go first, and you can see then if it still scares you!"

You watch as he skillfully climbs to the top and then back down, the wind making his hair look like Jimmy Neutron's

But he's so cute

"Fine, I'll do it!!"

You muster up your courage and go to the scary slide!!

When you dive into the pool, Jungwon is close to meet you

"Wasn't it fun?"

You nod and he smiles at you, a clear hint of pride in his eyes

You both raid the entire waterpark and soon enough it's almost nighttime

Dinner time it's getting close, and your stomachs know it🙏

You decide it's time to get out of the water and buy some snacks!!

Then you spend the following hours at the park's arcade, waiting for midnight

Jungwon is honestly so bad at games😭 but he tries his best so it's okay

He makes all these tiny cat noises while playing🤧

Five minutes before christmas, you go outside to wait for the surprise

A countdown soon starts, and a display of fireworks goes off to welcome the 25th

Jungwon’s eyes are glowing with a mix of colors when you face him under the painted sky

He kisses you in a way that makes you think clichés are not that bad<3

You get lost in the feeling of his lips until a particularly loud firework makes you flinch🤕

There are dumb smiles plastered in both your faces as you continue watching the show

It's your first time celebrating christmas after moving together!!

You're currently at the supermarket with your hyper boyfriend, walking through the aisle full of decorations

He picked a little of everything, even some ice cream

"Look at this one! It looks like you!"

"Y/N, you said the same about all the reindeer decorations already"

"But look at its eyes🥺"

You insisted on buying matching reindeer headbands

And of course, he would never say no to you!!

After checking off, you guys need to rush back home so that the ice cream won't melt

Once arrived, Heeseung starts working on the tree while you hang lights

Since you have trouble reaching the highest places, you soon switch tasks though🤕

You and Heeseung sing along to your favorite christmas songs<3

The tree is a little small since the apartment is so too

But it’s so pretty!!

You place the letters you and Heeseung made for each other on its branches

"Can you give me a spoiler"

"We agreed to wait until midnight!!"

You help heeseung put a cute reindeer on the front door and the decorations are ready!

After having dinner, you are at the couch sharing chocolate ice cream and watching tv

Because neither of you is eager to go out tonight

It might be because it's the first time, but spending the night like this in the comfort of your shared place feels more comfortable than going out!

You take peeks at the letters the whole time because you saw your boyfriend working so hard on it earlier:((

As soon as the clock hits midnight, you and Heeseung rush to the little tree and pick your respective letters!!

"Please don't laugh at mine:(("

He's so embarrassed🤧

You take him by the hand and go back to the couch

Reading each other's letters in a comforting silence, giggling every now and then

Heeseung’s letter mentions so many tiny details about your relationship, that you start getting emotional

And it seems like you had the same effect on him

When both of you finish with your letters, there are tears forming in your eyes🥲

"I'm so in love with you"

Heeseung leans in for a short kiss, sweetly running his fingers through your hair

And he promises to make all the holidays you spend together better than the last one<3

This is the first year both of your families are celebrating together

He was super confident before when he decided to invite everyone

But now that there are barely a few hours left for the people to arrive, he's nervous as hell👎

He cooked the entire day and still hasn't finished

He put so much effort into finding cold Christmas dishes

You were busy decorating the dining room

And you decided to check on him because it had been way too long since the last time he had complained about how difficult is to take the grapes' seeds off

You entered the kitchen and he was still making the fruit salad for dessert

He was mindlessly cutting some pineapple slices into tiny cubes as he went over his mental to-do list

Too absorbed in his own thoughts to notice how you were slowly approaching him from behind

You surprised him with a back hug<3

But the temperature in the room was so high that both of you felt like boiling just from the contact💀

So, you opted to rest your head on his shoulder

You were watching him do his thing

Until a bowl of fresh strawberries caught your attention

You wanted to eat a well-deserved snack because you had been working on preparations for hours now

But you barely touched the fruit before Jay smacked your hand away🤕

You whined in protest, but he told you to wait until dinner

"Nice, there'll be three moms at the table tonight"

His dramatic ass gasped in disbelief

"You know what? I'll give you one just to prove you wrong!"

You were a little confused by that, but it didn’t matter if it meant that you would finally have a strawberry😋

Jay held a fruit up and gestured for you to open your mouth

You didn't question him, as you were used to him feeding you

He looked at you in the eyes as he ate the strawberry instead of giving it to you🥲

Before you could complain, he was already kissing you, letting you taste the sweet flavor from his lips

"That's all you will get for now, be a good girl and wait for tonight, yeah?"

I always write Jake as a party monster and today is no exception🙏

You guys were going to this party hosted by a club located at the beach

Baby was already hyped long before arriving, singing along to the songs in your shared playlist while driving<3

The first thing that catches his attention after you guys make it to the club, is couples sharing piñas coladas with two straws

And because he's an actual romantic (trust🤞) he wants one too!!

He ends up drinking it himself💀

He got carried away because it was his first time and boy was amazed

One thing leads to another, and he ends up buying almost every drink on the menu (inspired by his wine testing vlog, lol)

A few caipirinhas in and he's already tipsy, dragging you to the dance floor

You can't stop laughing at his sloppy dance moves, but he's having so much fun that you don't give it much thought and dance with him

A slow song starts playing and suddenly he gets so clingy

His cheeks are flushed red because of all the alcohol, but it only makes him look cute as hell

Also, the dazed look in his eyes as he hugs you is so attractive😣 holding your hand and your waist as the song reaches the climax

A part of you wants to pull away because it's literally summer and both of you are a little sweaty from all the dancing

But his arms feel so comfortable around you

He doesn't know if the daiquiri is starting to hit or what

But nothing feels real anymore, except for you in his embrace

He's so lost in the moment that he misses the cheers when the clock hits midnight

So, you take initiative and lean in for a kiss

Jake swears this is the best night of his life

Our ice prince here hates hot weather so much

So, you squish both your brains to plan things to do inside, where the ac is

You come up with the revolutionary idea of making gingerbread houses🙏

He's so excited to bake the cookies, but you persuade him to let you do it

Because Sunghoon can't be trusted when it comes to cooking, and you fear for your safety every time he gets close to the oven

Cookies get done in no time while he was out buying candy to decorate the houses

He almost brought the entire store💀

Your mouth was hanging open as you watched him dragging two gigantic bags full of jellies, chocolates and various other candies

"Is this enough??"

"Are you opening your own store soon or..."

It's finally decorating time‼️

You were so immersed in your own house that you didn't notice how Sunghoon had messed up the structure and was currently building an abstract house

He glares at you when you laugh at him

But gives up and asks for your help anyway🤥

You use meringue as concrete to stick the walls together

He watches with so much fascination as you effortlessly bring the little house to life

You smeared leftover meringue from your finger on the tip of his nose

"Make it look pretty, as if we were moving there to live together"

"I don't know if I wanna live with someone who uses meringue as makeup base"

"Fine, I'll let you get your revenge"

You say and close your eyes, waiting for the sugary substance to paint your nose as well

He's tempted to stick a jelly worm up your nose as revenge

But kisses you instead<3

"Someday we'll celebrate together in a house even prettier than this one, I promise"

Baby was so excited to wear a cute hat🤧

But even if the party was going to be celebrated at night, it was like 40 degrees outside

Being as stubborn as he is, Sunoo decides to use it anyway, to match the Christmas vibe yk

A few minutes after arriving, his brain is already melting like an ice cube under the red cloth

"Sunoo, your forehead is dripping with sweat are you okay??"

"Beauty is pain, Y/N, you wouldn't get it🙄"

You already knew this was coming so you had prepared beforehand two red caps with a white pompom on the top for both of you

He thinks it looks stupid (it does💀)

Rejects it saying something about the cap not complimenting the rest of his outfit

"Your brain can get fried then idc"

You put your cap on and he laughs at you

Somehow finds it cute because it's you💞

Ends up wearing the matching cap, his 💫aesthetic💫 long forgotten

Both of you look ridiculous, but it only takes one look at your big smile for Sunoo to go along with it

Y'all take millions of pictures to laugh at in the future

Some of them are without the hats because he needs some insta-worthy shots (the silly ones are uploaded to his stories though)

When the clock hits midnight, he tries to kiss you

His cap somehow hits yours as he leans closer😭

You guys are a laughing mess as he takes both hats off and finally kisses you<3

"Did a drop of your sweat just fall into my face"

"I'm blessing you with my holy water"

"Please never say that again"

You guys had no actual plans for christmas eve, it was more like a freestyle

Like going shopping and to get some ice-cream

After Riki asked you for the millionth time, you finally accepted his idea to go to the beach

This boy has So Much energy

You guys played in the water for like three hours straight

Splashing each other and later agreeing on a truce that lasted a few minutes before one of you betrayed the other and attacked from the back

But you were getting tired, so you went back to the shore and sat on a towel in the sand

Of course, he took the chance to laugh at you for acting like a grandma

One thing led to another, and you fell asleep

You woke up feeling disoriented, not realizing you had slept for at least half an hour

"Y/N! Stop moving, you're ruining my art!"

The art in question was a mermaid tail that Riki had made over your legs

You ignored his whines and got up to see what he was working on now

"Whatever, I already took pictures... You drooled a lot, by the way"

Your face flushed as your fingers traveled unconsciously to the corner of your mouth, effectively feeling the dried-up saliva

He laughed and you glared at him

"At least I don't snore like you!"

Riki ignored you and showed you his work: a snowman, but like, without the snow

A sandman🙏

You helped him pick pretty rocks and shells for decoration

Riki gives you a particularly big seashell, tinted pink and purple inside and makes you promise to keep it!!

The sand dude is finally finished after some more work

"He looks like Jay"

You snorted at the comment, admiring the final product

You and Riki took turns to take pictures with park sandseong

The sun was already setting, so you had to bid goodbye to your new friend

"Can't we take him home?:("

"Are you going to clean it if my cat decides to use him as a giant sandbox?"

"Nevermind"

After ordering something to eat, you sat on the couch to watch a christmas movie

Of course, Riki choose Home Alone

"We watched this one like seven times already"

"But it's so good!!"

"Seven times in the last month, Riki"

He shows you his puppy eyes and you sigh, signaling him to play the movie

Five minutes in and he's already knocked out on the couch with his head on your shoulder

It was like exhaustion hit him with a delay

You smile fondly at him and run a hand through his hair, turning down the volume

The alarm on your phone goes off, signaling the beginning of christmas

You take a look at the boy beside you and place a loving kiss on his cheek

"Merry christmas, Riki"

He answers with a snore😭

Enhypen masterlist

A/N: Feliz navidad<3 thank u for reading!

[piercethelenn]

doctor jungwon...

[piercethelenn]

happy two months to this one🙏

[piercethelenn]

fuck it -makes a pink christmas banner-

[piercethelenn]

♕Dos: Freak on a leash.

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♔Synopsis:

Stalemate, also known as the last resort for the losing player in a chess match; if performed correctly, can lead the game to end in a draw instead of succumbing to your opponent. This was the most valuable lesson Jake had learned from his girlfriend, Y/N, and never in his life had he imagined how her words could take a totally different meaning.

Previous ♕ Masterlist ♕ Next

[piercethelenn]

🍦Playing Cupid.

Kim Sunoo

Based on my Jungwon smau, 💫The Occult Club.

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Pairing:Numerologist! Matchmaker! Sunoo x Fem! Reader.

Genre: Fluff, strangers to lovers, High School AU, fantasy themes.

Synopsis: The city’s resident numerologist, Kim Sunoo, also known for being a member of the Occult Club and one of the most popular students at school, recently opened his brand-new business that offers matchmaking services and relationship counseling. Some of his clients had already become regulars, but there is a particular girl who keeps visiting him to ask for advice on how to win the heart of an incompatible match… But why is she so persistent?

Warnings: None!

Word count: 5,7k.

Keep reading

[piercethelenn]

♡ ꒱ enhypen as words instead of ❛ I love you ❜

pairing: enhypen x afab!reader

genre: fluff, established relationship

warnings: none!

a/n: hellaur, I'm back on this blog ♡ my schedule is hectic lately so please excuse my lack of activity 😔 I hope you enjoy this, let me know what you think please ♡

𝖧𝖤𝖤𝖲𝖤𝖴𝖭𝖦 — ❛ let's watch the sunrise together ❜

Being the night owl he is, Heeseung would love spending his nights with you, whether you're having deep talks or randomly just chilling in each other's arms. He would be laying on your lap and have you stroke his hair softly, because that's how he relaxes. Everything about doing an all nighter with him would be so perfect that you wouldn't even realize how the time passed, and when he notices it's almost the time for sun to rise, the romantic in him will wake up and offer you to watch the sunrise together, with his doe eyes blinking cutely and his pretty lips curled up into the most adorable grin you've ever seen.

𝖩𝖠𝖸 — ❛ I told my parents about you ❜

Jay has a really close relationship with his parents, he is almost like friends with them. He calls his mom daily to chat about most random things, which often includes the events that happens in his life. There's no doubt that if Jay likes you likes you, he's gonna tell it to his mom/dad first, smiling shyly at the phone as he talks about how amazing and outstanding you are, telling them that he can't wait to introduce you with them. But the same way he shares everything with them, he shares with you too, so when he comes to tell you that he mentioned you to his parents, he is dying out of excitement on the inside while trying to look cool on the outside.

𝖩𝖠𝖪𝖤 — ❛ you're my world ❜

Jake is really good with his words, he knows how to melt your heart everytime he opens his mouth. But as much as he loves the cliché "I love you so much", sometimes he feels like that's not enough to describe his feelings, so he goes with the variations of it that sounds much cooler to the ears. And his favorite is "You're my world" because, to him, you're literally everything he has. He can't imagine a life without you, nor he wants it, he can not imagine another home to go to besides you, nor he wishes for it. He adores you so much that you feel like the sun of his planet and without you, there's no light, there's no warmth in his heart.

𝖲𝖴𝖭𝖦𝖧𝖮𝖮𝖭 — ❛ I got you something on my way here ❜

Sunghoon is the shy boyfriend who's a complete marshmallow on the inside. But the problem is, he melts uncontrollably when he meets the warmth of your love, so he often chooses to express just how badly he is in love with you in other ways. Since his speed of blushing doesn't help him being a romantic poet, he often goes for buying you small gifts whenever you plan to meet. He carefully picks the items that he thinks you will find cute, because he loves seeing your face light up with the most beautiful smile he's ever seen whenever he gifts you something. He falls in love with you all over again, falling deeper and deeper each time.

𝖲𝖴𝖭𝖮𝖮 — ❛ this song reminded me of you ❜

Sunoo is your cliché yet very endearing type of boyfriend. He's the type to make you spotify mixes out of the most romantic love songs you've ever heard, and randomly link it to you because he doesn't hold back from showing his love. He would even record himself singing the particular parts of the songs you seem to like and send it to you whenever he feels that you're a little down. He's the type to draw little doodles around the lyrics he likes and show it you while saying "hey, this reminded me of you" , also the type to serenade you on video calls or face to face meetings.

𝖩𝖴𝖭𝖦𝖶𝖮𝖭 — ❛ good morning/good night ❜

Jungwon never misses a day of sending you his very timid good morning/good night texts. He wakes up before you and the first thing he does is to greet you with a cute good morning message along with an adorable bed selfie attachment. He does the same thing before going bed, always sends you a video/voice note/picture of him wishing you a good night, even on the most hectic days of his schedule. He says that the reason he pays attention to do it is because as your boyfriend, he wants to cherish you every time of the day, at least in the mornings and the nights. He thinks that you deserve to be reminded of how much you're loved.

𝖭𝖨𝖪𝖨 — ❛ can't you stay a little longer ❜

Even though Niki is the type to bicker, to tease his love interest, as much as he loves pranking you, he loves to spoil you with unexpected shower of love from time to time. His love language is to spend time together, no matter what you're doing and he hates it when it's time for you to separate. He'd purposefully try to distract you from leaving, definitely would pout and whine while asking you to stay a little longer with him. He's the type to use his own body as a barricade to keep you from going away, and if that won't work, he's gonna hold you hostage with tight hugs, until you agree to stay a little more by his side.

ᓚᘏᗢ 𓂃 𝗍𝖺𝗀𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍 ⌗

@gegeetime @animeepedia @jak-ey @hanienie @quokkasunggie @yjjungwon @heeswifeyy @02dreamerz

[piercethelenn]

♕Uno: You were adopted from the zoo.

ㅤ

♔Synopsis:

Stalemate, also known as the last resort for the losing player in a chess match; if performed correctly, can lead the game to end in a draw instead of succumbing to your opponent. This was the most valuable lesson Jake had learned from his girlfriend, Y/N, and never in his life had he imagined how her words could take a totally different meaning.

Previous ♕ Masterlist ♕ Next

[piercethelenn]

⚔️Kingslayer masterlist.

Nishimura Riki

Based on the song by BMTH

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Pairing Prince! Riki x Princess! fem reader.

Genre: Fanfiction, strangers to lovers, fantasy, angst, fluff in the middle.

Synopsis:

Rumor has it that there is an evil, destructive force wandering the streets of all the nearby kingdoms that took away the lives of two powerful kings known for being merciless tyrants. Regardless, your fearless and ambitious father is too obsessed with the idea of arranging your future marriage with the heir of the Nishimura house to care about gossip.

Warnings: Death, explicit violence, mentions of blood and weapons, swearing.

Chapters! (total wc: 18,4k)

Teaser

Prince from the south.

The forbidden meeting.

Just practicing.

The caged pigeon.

Reconnaissance.

Warranty.

Strawberry jam lips.

[piercethelenn]

❝🩹The Balcony Scene.❞

ㅤPark Sunghoon

ㅤㅤㅤBased on the song by Pierce The Veil

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Genre: Angst with a good ending, trainee! skater! Sunghoon.

Synopsis:

There is a limit to how much pressure a person can endure, and it takes courage to let go, move on, and most importantly, heal from the pain that passion has inflicted on the heart.

Warnings: Negative thoughts, overwork and mental exhaustion.

Word count: 1,6k.

ㅤ

Have you ever really danced on the edge?

Is something still scaring you?

There was nothing more embarrassing in this world than getting beaten in his own game, walking out the rink with his head hanging low, and a sorrowful expression accompanied by a deep, defeated sigh.

Sunghoon was not perfect, that was a given, but regardless of his young age he had to meet the highest expectations and excel at everything he does; in the end, however, he was just a little kid trying to reach the cookie jar from the tallest shelf.

A bothersome, burning pain could be felt in his hands and knees after his blood pressure started increasing in response to his fall, taking away the cold sensation of the ice surface. He was totally aware of the piercing stares coming from his peers and he could hear the words of concern from the coach, but everything felt so blurry, so distant.

He mumbled something about wanting to leave early and started packing his belongings, no one stopped him. The knot on his skates wouldn't budge, his hands were shaky and his mind racing with the darkest thoughts as he fought with the laces; why do the simplest of things seem to always morph into formidable challenges when he is in a sensitive mood? was it so hard for the universe to spare him, only this time, and leave him alone?

He just wanted to run away and dig a hole in the ground to hide until danger, and all the stressful situations he wanted to avoid had passed by, but because fate was never on his side, he was now waiting at a crowded stop to get into an even more packed bus; on top of that, his only privacy upon arriving to the shared dorms would be under his blankets.

His headphones were not enough to block the sound, the engine was too loud, a baby was crying their lungs out, an old lady talked on the phone, and a group of teenagers yelled and laughed in the back; he turned up the volume, it was no use, everything was so nosy, so suffocating, why can't everyone just shut up? he couldn't rest his head on the window, the seat was too uncomfortable, and his bag was bothering him, why is everything so unbearable?

He stepped out of the bus with a knot forming in his throat and headed with heavy steps to the building door and upstairs to the shared dorm, his heart almost skipped a beat when he thought the key was missing, but he found it at the bottom of his bag after searching frantically a good ten minutes; he must have looked incredibly stupid to the people that passed by on the hallway.

A few trainees greeted him, he was barely able to respond with a nod of his head. Sunghoon scanned the room, but Jay was nowhere to be seen, fantastic, the only person he wanted to see was not there. The other boys present were getting ready to leave for night practice, but the skater had to finish his school assignments first.

He sat on the only chair in the small room and opened the book where he last left off, about seven chapters behind his classmates, but he could not focus on whatever was written. His eyes were sore from exhaustion, a yawn left his lips, there was not enough time to wash up, he had to hurry before joining the other trainees.

His head was spinning, the characters were floating on the page, and the images were blurry; that's when he noticed the book was upside-down, he sighed again, already losing count of how many times he had done so throughout the day. He used his last drop of mental strength to interpret the text before him, the characters were now readable, but the words had no meaning to him; why was he trying so hard to study? he was failing all of his classes anyways.

He had tried countless times to convince himself that there was no reason for him to have outstanding grades since he was planning to commit his whole life to either ice skating or an idol career, but at times like these, where he could not even comprehend the title of the chapter, he felt so brainless, so useless, so worthless.

Why was he trying so hard to get academic validation when no one ever paid attention to his victories? His teachers, his parents, his classmates, everyone ignores his progress, they only care about pointing fingers at his mistakes.

It was the same when skating, and also when attending his dancing and singing lessons. He had no motivation to go tonight just to get yelled at by the coach, he had been embarrassed enough for the day and now just wished to take a shower and sleep, but he had at least three hours of practice ahead; he was not yet done dropping sweat and getting humiliated in front of everyone for not being good enough.

He only became aware of his steaming, warm tears when a wet patch was visible on the unread page before him. Sunghoon was not the type to cry, on the contrary, he barely did so, always opting to endure his pain and sadness, as he had no time to waste on something he considered to be so impractical; however, he had found himself spilling tears with a concerningly increased frequency as of late, and this time, it was too late to hide from his roommates.

One of the trainees approached him and asked if he was okay, but he didn’t answer, he could not do so as the knot in his throat had tightened and impeded any words from coming out. He just stayed there, looking at the wet pages, the other trainees said something about leaving first and now he was finally alone, but he stayed in place. His mind was so loud, enough to make the neighbors hear how he was tormenting himself with yet another avalanche of thoughts.

He was so tired. Tired of not being enough, tired of running restlessly without moving forward in the slightest, tired of being criticized, mocked at, stared at, pitied at. He wanted to be alone but did not want to feel left out or abandoned, he wanted to do great things but was dying to take a rest. Keeping up with school, skating, and trainee life was slowly taking all the vitality and energy left in him; he was told by many people to choose a single path, but how could he give up any of the two? How could he let go of a sport he practiced almost every single day for the past ten years, or send farewell to the friends he made while training to become an idol?

Sunghoon got up from the chair with difficulty, his legs felt like melting butter and a persistent headache was killing him. He slowly made his way to the balcony to get some fresh air to cool his racing mind; the street below was packed, as usual, there were many people taking leisure walks, using their phones, or walking their dogs, some of them seemed busier than others, but everyone looked so small, so insignificant from up where the skater was watching. He took a deep breath, filling his lungs with the cold autumn breeze.

After tuning down his anxiety, he realized that there was no way he could continue living the way he had been doing so for the past years, he had to let go of some of the pressure before he collapsed under the weight of his responsibilities. He looked up and gazed at the stars that adorned the night sky, spreading limitlessly; if only he could hide between them, just for a few hours, it would feel so nice to not feel anything, just until he is ready to come back down and face life with a newfound energy.

If only he could fly away, things would have been so much easier, but raising his hand was the highest he could go, the closest to freedom he could reach. His eyes were gleaming with tears again as he looked at his extended hand, helplessly coming down after failing to steal one of the twinkling stars to keep inside his heart, and without much thought, he started dancing.

He danced, because that is everything he knows, he danced because his body feels light when doing so as if he could lift his feet off the ground and meet the clouds. The breeze flowed around him, his movements were impregnated with sorrow, confusion, and helplessness. The people walking on the street below did not see him, nor did the other trainees, his family, and his friends; right at this moment, it was only dance and him, and for the first time in his life, he felt understood, encouraged, at peace.

The answer was so clear, he wanted to dance, to spend the rest of his life speaking the language he was the most fluent in. Sunghoon was a quiet person, bad at expressing his feelings to the point where he had to seal all of his worries inside his heart, not being able to express them, but his chest could no longer keep up with the weight and simply exploded, letting out everything that he had kept for himself.

Through his dance, he talked about all the hardships he had gone through at a young age, complained about all the things that bothered him, and thanked all the people who stuck beside him even at his lowest.

Tears were no longer falling, and all he could do now was to push forward, toward a new dream.

ㅤ

A/N: This is my first time writing a birthday special, and also my first work with Sunghoon as the protagonist, so it had to be special somehow. I cried so hard while making this, I hope all the emotions that I wanted to converge are well delivered.

As a former athlete myself (I'll never regret leaving though, the environment is toxic af), I've always related to Sunghoon a lot, also having similar personalities makes me kinda see myself in him, in a way(?), so I was naturally drawn to him, and even have the pleasure to call him my role model; I admire him so much.

Sunghoon is one of the bravest people ever, and everytime we get to see him develop and grow makes me so happy🥺 I can't wait to see what the future has prepared for him!

Also, I needed to include dancing here because I genuinely think that he's one of the best dancers in Enhypen, he totally devoured all his dance solos and definitely deserves more praise!

And yeah, this is not even half the things I wanted to say, but I have no idea how to put into words how lucky I feel to have someone like Sunghoon to look up to :] so this is the end of my rant(?)

To our Sunghoon, Engene's pride and the bestest boy ever, I wish you the happiest birthday, you deserve nothing but happiness, I love you :(💞