pinkywildflower

[pinkywildflower]

decisions | katsuki bakugou

pro-hero! bakugou x pro-hero! reader

word count: 2.6k

tw: cursing, severe injuries/mentions of injuries, hurt/no comfort, trauma, blood, guilt, self-hatred, this is just pure angst and pain

a/n: reader's quirk is not specified

-

“what are you doing here, bakugou?”

bakugou. he knew it was his name and that it shouldn’t feel weird for someone to call him by it, but it felt weird coming from you. it felt foreign, wrong coming out of your mouth. he never imagined that once you became intimate enough to use his first name that you’d ever go back to calling him so formally. it felt like you were speaking to him like you were strangers, and it hurt him a lot more than he’d like to admit. not just because you were treating him this way, but because you were right in doing so.

you were strangers, and it was all his fault. 

he still remembered the day everything changed, when he gave into his fears and left like a coward. he left without consulting you or even trying to figure anything out. he was too blinded by his own self-hatred for failing you the way he did, or at least in the way he thought he did. 

you had just come back from your first physical therapy appointment a few days after you were discharged from the hospital for your spine injury. as a pro-hero, it wasn’t out of the ordinary for you to be injured on the job. it was a regular part of your life and, thanks to the hero-specialized doctors available to heroes nowadays, injuries were rarely a cause for too much concern. however, this injury in particular was an injury that changed the trajectory of your life in the five seconds it took for you to get injured in the first place. 

bystanders claimed that the impact was fast enough to miss if someone wasn’t paying attention, but to you and katsuki, it felt like it would never end, as if the world had slowed down time to purposefully taunt the both of you. 

he should’ve listened when you told him to wait for reinforcements. he should’ve known that this particular mission wasn’t that simple. he should’ve been suspicious of how easy it was to find the targets. he’d been a pro for years at this point, with UA as a distant memory. he couldn’t use his inexperience for justify his actions anymore (not that he would’ve anyway, even as a rookie). he’d made the wrong call despite your best efforts to dissuade him from his decision. he’d led you into a trap that cost you everything you worked so hard to accomplish, and he hated himself for it. 

surrounded by an ambush and trying not to lose to any of the villains, katsuki hadn’t noticed one of the building’s beams collapsing behind him. he also hadn’t noticed you running towards him and pushing him out of the way, only for yourself to be crushed by the falling beam instead of him. in the same way you’ll never forget the look on his face when he saw your crushed form under the beam, he knew in that moment that he’d never forget the terrible crushing sound when it fell on your back. 

thankfully, the reinforcements you’d called earlier showed up and helped put a stop to the villains, but even at the scene of the injury, everyone knew that this hit wasn’t something you’d come back from. the damage had already been done, and, although the impact hadn’t killed you, you doubted you’d ever be able to walk again, much less continue being a hero.

these fears had been confirmed when they rushed you to the hospital for emergency surgery. thankfully, due to the advanced medicine you’d had access to in this new age of quirks and heroes, the damage done to your spine was fixable enough to make sure you wouldn’t lose complete mobility in your legs. with enough time, and a good amount of physical therapy, you’d probably be able to walk with no issues. however, even with all the technology, it wasn’t enough to save your hero career. as it was, combat and intense movement would be too much for your body, and could even cause further damage. 

after only a few years in the field, you retired before your career even had a chance to take off, and katsuki couldn’t help but blame himself for it. 

it was only a matter of time, you supposed, until his guilt and self-hatred would consume him. when you woke up in the hospital after the surgery, katsuki looked utterly terrible. 

it was obvious that he hadn’t gone home since you were admitted the day before, still in his torn and dirty hero costume. he hadn’t slept either, the bags under his eyes being a dead giveaway. he was a mess, and his state only worsened after he’d heard the doctor tell you that you couldn’t do hero work anymore. 

even after the doctors assured that you were going to be ok and that you’d eventually recover mobility in your legs, he still refused to leave. it wasn’t until kirishima came to visit that you convinced him to drag katsuki home to at least shower and eat something that he left your side. even then, his absence wasn’t for long, and he returned only after about 2 hours.

katsuki wasn’t exactly known for being overly talkative (unless when he’s angry of course), but, despite his overprotectiveness and refusal to leave, he was almost completely silent the entire time. sure, he’d ask you if you needed anything or if you were in any pain of some sort, but, other than that, he kept conversation to a minimum. 

he wanted desperately tell you how sorry he was for being stubborn. he wanted to tell you that everything was going to be ok and that he’d support you during your recovery. he wanted to tell you that he’d do anything to make up for what he did, but how? 

how could he make it up to you? he’d taken away your future, your career, your dreams. it didn’t matter what he did or said, he’d never be able to take back his actions. he’d never be able to give you your dream back. 

it’s not that he didn’t want to talk to you, it’s that he didn’t feel that he deserved to. as far as he was concerned, he ruined your life, and it was eating him up from the inside. it was only the selfish part of him that wanted to be around you that kept him from leaving you in the that hospital room alone. 

he was fighting with himself, and it’s the only reason why you accepted his silence. you remembered his UA days and how he blamed himself for all might’s retirement. you could only imagine the guilt he was feeling at your retirement.

you’d been one of the only people he could open up to, and the only person he trusted and loved enough to pursue a relationship with. you’d known him since high school, and you’d watched him grow into a man who could communicate more openly and make himself vulnerable. he’d made so much progress and, yet, here he was: back in his first year fighting midoriya in the training zone. except this time, it was himself who he wanted to punch. 

it went on like this, the silence, until you were finally cleared to go home. in fact, the only proper conversation you had with him was when you were setting up your physical therapy treatment and he spoke up just to tell you that he’d be going with you once he noticed your discomfort at the thought of having to go. it wasn’t a long conversation by any means, but it was the only time he’d showed even a tiny bit of life since the accident. you hadn’t argued with him either. truth be told, his presence was a comfort you desperately needed. 

once you got to your shared home, you could instantly tell that he felt a lot better, although not drastically. there were moments where he seemed to go back to normal, but, you could still tell that he was feeling guilty. you’d tried talking to him about on multiple occasions, but he’d only change the subject. it was obvious that he just wanted to forget the entire thing happened, but that was almost impossible considering how he was the one helping you move around and adjust to your wheelchair. you tried to assure him that it was temporary and that you’d be walking again in no time, but just the sight of it made your words meaningless to him. 

it was a few days after you’d gone home that you had your scheduled physical therapy appointment, and, true to his word, katsuki had tagged along. truth is, he demanded a month-long leave of absence from his agency, both because he wanted to be able to attend your first few appointments and because he still couldn’t put on his hero costume without thinking about the accident. he felt like it was needed, and honestly, you felt like he deserved a break too. 

much like with most things done for the first time, your first appointment was a mess. after your consultation with the therapist and after setting up your treatment, you’d been hopeful, maybe even a little too hopeful. you’d assumed that your hero training would make the process a bit easier, but you’d been wrong. of course, you knew it was going to be hard, and even painful, at first, but you’d left that first appointment feeling as hopeless as katsuki looked, which didn’t go unnoticed by him in the slightest. 

he’d watched you fall. he’d watched you struggle. he’d watched your spirit break, and it was all his fault. he couldn’t take it anymore. after almost a week of trying to hold it together and move past this with you, he’d reached his limit. he had to do something about it, even if it hurt you in the process. 

the ride home was silent, neither of you wanting to talk about what had just happened. it had been a rough day, but, unbeknownst to you, it was about to get a lot worse. 

he’d settled you down onto the couch in the living room when you got home. you assumed he wanted to cheer you up by watching a movie with you like he usually does, but you were caught off guard when he sat down on the coffee table in front of you instead of next to you on the couch. nothing could’ve prepared you for what came out of his mouth.

“I ruined you.”

his voice was quiet, too quiet, but you heard it as if he’d yelled it for the entire town to hear. it made your heart shatter, he’d sounded so defeated, broken. 

you opened your mouth, about to say something in protest but he immediately cut you off, standing up in the process. 

“don’t you dare try and tell me otherwise, you know damn well that it’s true. just look at you! you had your entire life ahead of you. you’re a retired hero and you’re not even 25! we were supposed to start an agency, remember? you and me, together! and now… now you have to learn how to walk again, and all because I didn’t listen to you… 

“katsuki, this isn’t —“

“don’t give me that shit! it is my fault! I should’ve listened to you. I should’ve waited for the reinforcements like you said. or I at least should’ve been paying attention to my surroundings. if it’d done my job properly, I would’ve been able to avoid that beam from falling. hell, if anything, it was me that pillar was supposed to fall on, not you!”

“don’t say that! pushing you out of the way was my choice, not yours. and don’t you dare tell me that you wouldn’t have done the same in that situation. we’re supposed to protect each other! we’re partners. it’s not just your responsibility to protect me. I need to protect you too!” 

“bullshit! protecting each other? well, it’s obvious that I did a shit job at it! I—.”

his voice broke off, his emotions getting the best of him. his actions were frantic and he refused to look at you, looking at at the ceiling while raking his hand through his hair. he took a few moments to compose himself (or at least as much as he could), and sat back down on the coffee table, looking down at the ground.

“I— I can’t do this… if I couldn’t protect you when it mattered the most so… what’s the point? who am I to keep you like this? how do I have any right to be in your life? i thought this would work, that it would get better but… damn it! it hurts to even look at you!”

“katsuki! I—"

“—I called the hero commission while you were filing out the check-out paperwork after the appointment. they’re sending someone to come help you until you start moving around on your own again. i’ve set it all up. you don’t need to worry about the money, i’m taking care of it. they’ll be here in a few minutes.” 

if your heart hadn’t already shattered at his guilt, this last statement surely did the job. you wanted to scream at him, tell him he was being cruel. you wanted to beg him to stay, that it would get better, that you would both move past this, but all you could do was sit in silence as he went over the logistics and started to pack up his things. 

you saw the way the accident affected him. he was a shell of his former self, his eyes were hollow and full of pain. you figured it was cruel of you to force him to stay when he blamed himself for everything. your very existence was a sign of his failure. you didn’t protest when your nurse showed up, nor did you stop him when he left. you were going to get better, and even if katsuki’s absence made it feel almost impossible, it was something you needed to do for yourself. 

and, by all accounts you did. it looks months of painful and tedious recovery and physical therapy, but, you had reached a point where you could walk without much assistance. you’d sent the nurse the hero commission sent a few weeks ago despite the protests of your friends, but after everything that happened with katsuki, you needed time alone. you didn’t want to be unreasonable, hence waiting until only a few weeks ago, but their presence was only a reminder of your heartbreak. 

he hadn’t reached out to you since the day he left. you’d heard about him from your shared high school friends, and he apparently wasn’t doing too well either, but, other than that, you tried not to think about it. you’d thought that, after a while, you’d start to blame him for what happened, resent him for your injuries and forced retirement. part of you wanted to, perhaps it would make you feel better about the entire situation, maybe hating him would give you the fuel to finally move on from all of this. it was something that often crossed your mind but could never decide on. 

as fate would have it, however, it seemed that the universe wouldn’t let you leave that thought unanswered, not when a certain blond haired pro-hero showed up knocking at your door at 2am with his hair disheveled and his costume a bloody mess. you couldn’t help but ask just what he was doing at your door when he’d left without giving you so much as a choice in the matter. you also couldn’t help but call him by his last name, reminding him of his cruel decision and what that meant for the two of you. you took note of his bothered expression, flinching at the unfamiliarity of your words. 

it seemed like tonight was the night you’d have to make a decision, but even you weren’t sure which one was right. 

[pinkywildflower]

head-first | katsuki bakugou

katsuki bakugou x gn! reader

word count: 3.4k

tw: cursing, slight injuries/mentions of injuries, insecurities, jealousy

a/n: reader has a healing quirk

-

you couldn’t help but smile whenever you recounted your first kiss with katsuki, not just because it was a sweet memory, but also because of how much of a mess it truly was.

now, to both you and katsuki’s defense, your shared inexperience certainly didn’t help the situation. doing anything for the first time is bound to result in some awkwardness. however, you also had to admit that katsuki’s rough nature and tendency to charge at things head-first didn’t make it any easier either, especially since he took the whole “head-first” thing quite literally. 

you were both in your third year when it happened. you’d been “something-close-to-friends” since your first year at UA and “something-more-than-friends” for a few months, with neither one of you actually having the guts to address the growing feelings and tension between the two of you. 

being the genius he was, you’d occasionally ask him to study with you in hopes that he’d notice how lost you were and help you while telling you how much of a dumbass you were for not understanding something so simple. 

(the term “dumbass” eventually turned into “dummy” once he started to notice how cute you looked when you concentrated really hard while trying to solve a math problem.)

regardless, that day was no different, with you and katsuki studying together in his dorm room. he’d just explained to you how to use a formula to solve a problem you were having trouble with and it was quiet. the only sounds heard in the room were the combined sounds of your pencils scribbling on paper and your combined breaths. by all means, on a normal day, this would be calming for both you and katsuki, being together in comforting silence. however, a certain conversation katsuki had earlier that day with kaminari made the ongoing silence deafening. 

it was no secret that you and katsuki had a complicated dynamic, with neither of you able to hide your awkward and intense feelings from the rest of your classmates. this meant a fair share of teasing from your classmates, with kaminari being the main source of those teases. however, this time was different. usually kaminari’s remarks would go without proper acknowledgment due to their frequency, but this time even katsuki couldn’t ignore it. 

it was earlier that day during your regularly scheduled school mandated training and, much to katsuki’s displeasure, you’d been paired up with none other than midoriya. sure, his relationship with the green-haired boy had greatly improved throughout the years, however, his competitive nature and inferiority complex still made him quite irrational at times, especially if his feelings were involved. 

it was no secret that midoriya was far better at both expressing his feelings and showing kindness to those he cared about, a skill that katsuki struggled at even as a third year. it also certainly didn’t help that your healing quirk paired well with midoryia’s brute strength and fighting ability. training with him meant practicing both your combat and healing abilities, which also meant that he was able to further exert himself and his abilities as well. by all means, it was a good match, a great match even, and it pissed off katsuki to no end. 

he envied the way you’d smile and laugh with midoriya during your breaks, talking about who-knows-what with him while patching him up. it almost maddened him the way you’d gently touch his arms, finding small injuries and engulfing them with warm light, your light. 

katsuki must’ve been openly glaring (or at least a lot more than usual) because he was promptly taken out of his angry thoughts by kaminari’s usual teasing tone.

“what’s wrong, kacchan? mad midoriya beat you to the punch?”

this made katsuki pause for longer than he would’ve liked. anger and confusion flashed across his face. kaminari had managed to provoke one of his biggest insecurities: his inability to express himself. 

“the fuck are you going on about, dunce-face?” 

kaminari grinned, not hiding his satisfaction at having succeeded in getting a reaction out of his grumpy friend. 

“come on, you can’t seriously believe that you’re the only one with eyes on y/n, right?”

katsuki stayed silent at that while kaminari grinned wider at katsuki’s silent confirmation. he’d never actually admitted his feelings to anyone before. 

“look, all i’m saying is that it’s been like 2 years of nothing but private study sessions and silent glances when you don’t think anyone’s looking. doesn’t exactly scream ‘official’ or anything.” 

that earned kaminari a glare of his own, but regardless, he kept going, more serious this time. 

“it’s only going to get worse once we graduate, you know. once we’re finally pros and out in the real world. the attention they’re going to receive.”

that seriousness was short lived, with kaminari’s grin coming back in full force for one final remark.

“but you already know that, don’t you,  kacchan? i mean, considering you know everything, you probably also already know that a certain green-haired classmate of ours is planning to confess to a certain healer tonight after they finish studying, right? hmm, but, considering that you still haven’t done anything about it, i’m assuming you’re probably cool with it. huh, how uncharacteristically mature of you” 

with that, aizawa’s voice brought everyone back to attention with the announcement that training was done for the day. with katsuki distracted, kaminari took it as an opportunity to leave. not that katsuki would’ve gone after him anyway, he was far too busy lost in his own thoughts, a feeling that would persist the rest of that afternoon, even extending to your scheduled study session with him. 

that nerd is confessing to y/n tonight, he thought to himself while looking at your sitting form, far too absorbed in your math homework to realize that he was staring. it wasn’t a question, it was a fact, and, although he was top of his class and could even be considered a genius, katsuki was, for once, completely dumbfounded, but not for the reasons one would think. the solution was right in front of him: you were right in front of him. all he needed to do was do something now and beat midoriya’s own confession while he still had the chance. 

unfortunately for katsuki, coming up with a solution isn’t what’s difficult for him, it’s actually carrying out the solution that stumps him. he’s not exactly good with his words (he can’t count the amount of times he’s accidentally made civilians cry while trying to save them) and his even his actions tend to come out awkward and rougher than intended. he needs to do something simple yet effective enough to convey his feelings, something even he can’t mess up, something like… a kiss? 

snap

“bakugou?! what was that for? did you hurt yourself? let me see.”

confused as to what you were talking about, katsuki looked down to see he’d broken his pencil, a metal mechanical pencil he’d gotten a few weeks back. he then looked up at your face, full of concern and confusion. 

oh, so that’s what that sound was, he thought to himself.

before he could answer, you pushed aside your homework in favor of getting closer to him and grabbing his hand, scanning for any injuries him breaking his metallic pencil in half could’ve caused. unsurprisingly, as strong as katsuki was, even he couldn’t avoid getting a cut or two when being as reckless as he usually was. you found a small cut in the palm of his hand and began to activate your quirk, the warm glow of it radiating from you hand. however, before doing anything, you stopped yourself.

“is this ok?” 

you’d always been told to get consent from anyone before healing them unless they physically couldn’t or it was life threatening. however, katsuki couldn’t help but remember how you’d healed midoriya earlier that day, seeing the warmth of your quirk touch that shitty nerd when his stupid quirk was too powerful for his body to handle. it was a warmth he didn’t get to experience due to his own stubbornness. he didn’t want your help if it meant admitting that something was wrong. you’d grown used to his rejections and were fully prepared for him to push you off and get a first-aid kit to deal with it himself. that, however, isn’t what happened.

“y-yeah,” he cleared his throat. “that’s fine.”

stunned at his response but not wanting him to backtrack and change his mind with your prying, you worked quickly and, soon enough, not even a mark was left from the cut he’d received. you smiled down at his hand, pleased with yourself and how good of a job you’d done. however, just as you were about to pull away and question katsuki on why he’d broken his pencil in the first place, it was his turn to grab your hand. 

his grip was firm but not painful, showing a great amount of restraint on his part. looking back up at his face, you could tell that he was focused, his gaze intense and unyielding. it made you feel both uneasy and flustered at the same time. neither of you said anything for a while, just opting to stare at each other for what felt like an eternity. 

meanwhile, katsuki was in an internal battle with himself. a kiss? yeah, right. i’m insane for even thinking of that possibility. hell, what’s my next crazy idea? professing my love on the school rooftop like the losers in the manga I read? or… like that shitty nerd will after they leave. to say that katsuki was conflicted would be an understatement. in this situation where the odds were in his favor and your feelings for each other were undeniable, katsuki was his own worst enemy, and it was starting to take a toll on him.

unbeknownst to him, in the middle of the battle going on inside his head and trying to decide if he was actually going to kiss you, his gaze traveled down from your eyes to your lips, which didn’t go unnoticed by you in the least. 

as much as he hated when others pointed it out, katsuki often wore his emotions on his face. whether it be displeasure, annoyance, or even the rare sight of pure unbridled joy, it didn’t take a genius to figure out what he was feeling. to those that may not know him well, it may just seem like he’s just constantly wearing a permanent scowl on his face, but it was quite the opposite. slight changes in his eyes, creases in his eyebrows, or even a twitch of his lips were a sign of something deeper than just anger, and, right in that moment, his eyes were telling you all the things he was too scared to say out loud. he was scared. 

truthfully, you were scared too. if you were the kind of person that could just be open with your feelings and say things outright, you wouldn’t be in this situation. you would’ve told him how you felt the second you realized it. instead, it’s been a few months since you realized you liked katsuki enough to want to pursue a romantic relationship with him yet you’d made little to no progress. right now he was trying his best to move forward despite his own fears and insecurities, and now it was your turn to reciprocate. 

with his hand still holding yours, you adjusted your grip so that your hands were intertwined instead of the awkward hold it was in. at this, katsuki flinched at the sudden movement but didn’t let go. eyes that were fixated on your lips moved to your eyes for a split second before moving back to your lips. you figured this was his way of asking the same question you’d asked him earlier when you wanted to heal him: is this ok? 

you nodded slightly, not trusting yourself to speak in this moment. your heart was beating out of your chest and you could feel yourself shaking with both nerves and excitement. 

now having your consent, katsuki’s grip tightened slightly before moving closer to you. to help save yourselves from the nervousness of the moment, you decided to close your eyes while he leaned in slowly, trying to close the gap between the two of you. with your eyes closed, you were hyperaware of his movements, his presence, his warmth. it was almost overwhelming how much you wanted this. 

however, as lovely as the moment was, you failed to remember one thing: katsuki is hardly one to take things slow or gentle, especially when emotions are involved. just as you could feel his breath against your lips, you could only assume that he panicked at the last second because— 

“ow! what the fuck?! 

—instead of making contact with your lips, katsuki’s forehead apparently had other ideas, mainly crashing into your forehead. 

soon enough, while you were too busy being stunned by what had just happened and processing the oncoming pain of having katsuki’s head bump into yours at full force, katsuki was busying himself by letting out all kinds of curses and obscenities, mostly at himself for being “stupid enough to mess up his first kiss with you this badly.” 

not being able to help yourself given the absurdity of the current situation, you did the one thing that could’ve possibly made the already bad situation worse: laugh, and you laughed hard. 

maybe it was the excess adrenaline or just how funny the situation actually was despite how much it failed, but you broke into a fit of laughter so great it was becoming hard to breathe, all while katsuki looked at you in utter disbelief. 

are they… laughing at me? of course they’re laughing at me, genius, i can already see the bruise starting to form on their forehead from my failed attempt at kissing them. so stupid, maybe they would be better off with the shitty nerd. at least he wouldn’t fuck it up this bad.

after letting out the last of your laughter and beginning to calm down and breathe properly again, you took notice of katsuki’s expression, and it wasn’t good. he’d dropped your hand soon after your foreheads made contact, and he was starting to get up, seemingly trying escape from the situation. you, however, had different plans.

before he could manage to stand up, you grabbed his hand again, pulling him towards you and making him sit down next to you. 

“hey— what are you doing? i thought—“ 

“sit still, dummy, you want to kiss me, right?”

shocked both at your bluntness and seeming willingness to try again despite the train wreck of the first attempt, all he could do is nod and wait for you to make a move.

instead of staying seated next to him, you get on your knees, attempting to become level with his face while he remains seated in front of you. for safe measure, you then decide to reach out both your hands, placing them on both sides of his face, effectively holding him in place to avoid another incident. at this, katsuki’s face turns red, due to both his embarrassment and the closeness of the action. 

with his face in your hands, you begin to lean in, closing the gap between the two of you in the same way that he did before. at this, he closes his eyes, waiting in eager anticipation to finally feel your lips on his. thankfully for the both of you, this time the only impacts made between the both of you are an awkward bump of your noses at the very beginning before finally ending with your lips against his. 

the kiss itself was clumsy, which was to be expected, but otherwise perfect. your soft lips were a nice contrast to his slightly chapped ones, and katsuki felt like he was going to go insane at having you this close to him. with both of your eyes closed, everything was amplified. you’d always smelled nice, but in this moment it was almost intoxicating how much he enjoyed your scent, your warmth, you. 

at some point, he became comfortable enough to move his hands to your waist, pulling you closer to him. despite your own hands holding him in place, you could still feel an awkward roughness in his movements. it was hard for him to give you full control, but he felt that it was needed in this moment. he couldn’t have done this without your help, and while his failure still stung, he was right to fall for you. who else would be able to put up with my bullshit?

after what feels like not nearly enough time, you finally pull away from each other, with the placement of his hands still keeping you close to him. his eyes are still intense, yet somehow somewhat dazed, as he looks at you, still not fully believing what just happened. despite the disaster that was his first try, his first kiss with you was better than anything he could’ve imagined, as cliché and sappy it sounded to admit it. 

after a moment of silence and with katsuki’s stare starting to become a little too intense for your heart to handle, you let your head fall forward onto his chest and place you hands on his shoulders for support. this seems to stun him for a bit, but he soon removes a hand from your waist and places it on the back of your head, patting a few times before letting it rest there.

“so… are you glad i didn’t let you run away?”  you ask, slightly muffled by his chest. 

“shut it,” he responds with no real malice in his voice. 

deciding that you wouldn’t be able to be truly productive after what had just happened between the two of you and what that now meant for your relationship, you instead decided to spend the rest of the planned study session talking about where you two would go from here on out. unfortunately for you both, the kiss didn’t make things much less awkward between the two of you, but at the very least you two had plans to go out on a date by the end of it, and that more than was enough for katsuki at the time. it was a start, and he was looking forward to it. 

in fact, katsuki was so pleased with himself and how well that evening ended up going that he completely forgot about what kaminari had told him earlier that day— about midoriya’s confession. 

it wasn’t until he heard commotion in the dorms the next day about a new couple holding hands that he remembered kaminari’s words: “you can’t seriously believe that you’re the only one with eyes on y/n, right?”

he froze for a second. what the fuck is going on? he thought to himself. did last night not mean anything to them? 

before katsuki’s thoughts could spiral any further, he felt something poke his shoulder, snapping him out of it.

“bakugou? what’s everyone talking about?” 

katsuki turned to you immediately after hearing your voice. you were looking up at him, clearly interested in the current situation and hoping that he had answers. as relieved, and somewhat disappointed in himself for assuming the worst, as he was at the situation, katsuki was beyond confused. wasn’t deku supposed to confess to them last night? who’s holding hands with the nerd in the common area? 

“bakugou? what’s wrong?” you asked, confused as to why katsuki would be upset at the news of the new couple. 

not answering you, he instead opted to grab your hand, pulling you into the common area to see who midoriya was holding hands with. truthfully, it’s not that he really cared, he was content as long as it wasn’t you, and with you standing next to him while midoriya was holding hands with one of his other classmates, he didn’t need to press on the issue anymore. really, he cared more about finding a certain dunce-faced classmate of his and forcing him to explain himself, keyword being: force. 

now, katsuki had grabbed your hand without thinking about the consequences of others seeing the both of you in that state. it wasn’t until he heard the girl’s squeals and saw your flustered face, which also contained your matching forehead bruises, that he realized what he had done. well, shit. so much for keeping it under wraps. 

regardless, he managed to ignore the questions and commotion that was now directed at the both of you once he saw his target. 

“dunce-face,” he ground out in anger.

“oh, kacchan! what’s up? you seem surprised. didn’t i tell you that midoriya was confessing to a certain brunette yesterday during training? oh, wait— i did say brunette right? whoops— hey! calm down kacchan— ” 

“i’m going to kill you!” 

a/n: i purposefully left midoriya's s/o unclear so do with that what you will ;)

[pinkywildflower]

pro-hero! katsuki bakugou x gn! reader

word count: 850~

tw: cursing, angst, reader is sad and katsuki has self-doubts

-

katsuki noticed that you got home later than usual. 

he also noticed that you didn’t announce your presence when you did get home. as much as he pretended that you cheerfully calling out “i’m home!” and attacking him with hugs and kisses annoyed him, it was actually the favorite part of his day, and its absence bothered him a lot more than he’d like to admit. 

being with you made him feel emotions and sensations he never thought himself possible of feeling back in high school. he never thought he’d be so attentive and aware of his own feelings, much less anyone else’s. you managed to bring out the best in him without coddling or pressuring him. you weren’t there to be his therapist nor to be a savior, you were patient with him and gave him the support he needed. in turn, he gradually opened up to be who he is today. sure, he still has his moments and his old stubbornness will die with him, however, he wouldn’t be katsuki without his grumpy nature. 

back in high school, and even now, people often thought that katsuki was too selfish and self absorbed to care about others. his brashness and harsh behavior towards his classmates made people think the worst of him. it wasn’t until you got to know katsuki that you realized that it wasn’t that he didn’t care about anything or anyone, it’s that he cared too much, something that even katsuki wasn’t aware about. 

you watched as he would take note of kaminari struggling during training, just so he can later yell at him for being an idiot while aggressively giving him advice so that he can be “significantly less shitty.” you also watched as he called kirishima a dumbass for failing his math exam, only to then later give him specialized notes covering material that he was struggling with. he swore that they were the notes he himself used for the exam, but the different colored notebook proved otherwise. 

katsuki has always taken care of those he cares about, even if it took him a long time to realize it. his stubbornness and inability to manage his emotions wouldn’t allow it. but that was then, and things are a lot different now, so when you walked into your shared home emotionally overwhelmed and on the verge of tears he noticed. hell, he could feel your feelings of despair from all the way in the kitchen where he was waiting to eat the dinner he prepared with you (he always waited unless he knew you wouldn’t be able to eat with him that night). 

however, even with all of the growth he’s exhibited in the past few years, katsuki wasn’t exactly an expert on dealing with sensitive situations, especially when it comes to you. it’s not that he didn’t know how to handle and support you during your moments of vulnerability, he keeps your favorite treats in stock and he’s learned your preferences when your upset, it’s more so that he’s scared that he’ll somehow make it worse. katsuki isn’t exactly known to be gentle or calming in nature and he’s very much aware of it.

what if his attempts to comfort you come off as too aggressive? what if he says something insensitive on accident? what if he makes you uncomfortable? worst of all, what if he can’t help you at all? what if his attempts are useless and all he can do is watch you fall apart? 

he knows that you love him, gruffness and all. you remind him every day with your words and actions. he couldn’t believe it at first, that someone could actually love him for who he was, that there was someone who could love his flaws. he knows, yet he can’t help but doubt himself at moments like these, moments where he feels like his ability to love and care is needed the most. you need him and he wonders if there will ever be a day where it doesn’t completely bewilder him. he never knew how much he needed to be needed, the feeling of warmth it gave him, but now he couldn’t go back even if he tried. 

even so, even if the thought of you needing him brings him both warmth and doubtful thoughts, none of that truly matters once he sees your sad eyes. they’re welled with tears and looking straight at him, begging silently for the comfort you desperately need. 

“katsuki” 

he doesn’t realize that he’s gotten up and started walking towards you until he feels the warmth of your body against him, clinging and shaking as you finally let out the tears you’ve been trying to hold for the hours of time you spent at work. the sound of your broken voice calling out his name making him act before he could think and all the previous doubts leaving his mind in favor of taking care of you. 

“i’m here, baby. i’ve got you” 

katsuki was aware that he wasn’t perfect, but he wouldn’t be katsuki if he didn’t damn well try. 

[pinkywildflower]

manga thief | katsuki bakugou

pro hero! katsuki bakugou x gn! reader

word count: 1.4k

tw: cursing, mentions of social anxiety 

a/n: pro-hero dynamight stealing manga?! 

- 

maybe you should say something, preferably to one of the various workers wandering around the store. you should, however, your fear of confrontation and authority figures outweighed any kind of “heroic” intentions. 

you’d been excited to finally take a day for yourself and visit your local bookstore for a day of browsing. you’d always loved reading and even simply being in the presence of books made you feel warm and fuzzy. however, the warm and fuzzy feeling was quickly dampened upon seeing someone in the same section that you were dead set on browsing: the manga section.

a normal person would’ve just asked them to move over a bit so they could get what their looking for, but, once again, you guessed it: fear of confrontation. so, you instead decided to go into the next section over and pretend to care about some new fantasy series while you waited it out, hoping that they’d get what they were looking for quickly so you could go in right after. unfortunately for you, that hope was quickly diminished 10 minutes in. that was 5 minutes ago and yet, they still didn’t show any signs of moving anytime soon.  

on further inspection, you could determine that the mystery person was a man, and a tall one at that. he was wearing sweatpants, a black hoodie, and some athletic shoes. his hood was up, but even even then, you could still see some blond strands sticking out. not to mention he looked to be quite fit, even with the baggy clothes. you couldn’t help but sneak glances at him, he was attractive and you could’ve sworn you’ve seen him before, but where?

unbeknownst to you, the mystery man in question felt more panicked as the minutes went by. he should’ve ordered online like he usually does, but no, he just had to get them today. his impatience is the reason why he was in this situation in the first place. it was his first day off in months and he couldn’t wait the 3 days it would take for the volumes to be shipped. he’d figured that the bookstore would be empty at this time of day and no one would catch him buying the latest volume of “horimiya,” but someone had been watching him for the past 10 minutes. why won’t they just fucking leave already? have i been recognized? bakugou’s mind was whirling and to say he was panicking was an understatement. he did not need a picture of him buying shoujo romance manga on the front page of some shitty tabloid. he would never hear the end of it. 

fortunately for him, you were too busy working up the nerve to ask him to move over so that you could look at the romance manga section to realize that he was pro-hero dynamight. it was normally hard for you to confront others and stand up for yourself, especially if the person in question could crush you in a heartbeat, which you figured he not only could, but would. ugh, why is social anxiety so annoying? 

just as you were about to give up and return to the store another day for your precious manga, you noticed the mystery man shove a few manga volumes in his hoodie. he’s stealing?, you think to yourself. suddenly, you see him make a move towards the exit, the manga still in his hoodie pockets. oh no, he really is stealing!  why else would he stand in front of the manga section for 15 minutes without doing anything? someone needs to stop him— I need to stop him. 

maybe it’s the mixed adrenaline and panic of witnessing a crime, or maybe it’s because you’re already irritated from having your peaceful day off ruined, but, before you can process whether this is a good idea or not you’ve already moved to action. 

“hey, stop!”, you shout at him, making him only speed up on his way to the exit. I can’t let him get away!

already committing to this and the possible consequences, you also speed up. he’s nearing the checkout counter when you manage to grab his arm, making him turn around to face you, but when he does you’re panicked for a completely different reason. you recognize him instantly— 

“pro-hero dynamight?!” 

“it’s— it’s not what you’re thinking!”, bakugou shouts noticeably embarrassed, hiding the manga deeper into his hoodie pockets. 

“oh really? because it looks pretty obvious to me!”, you pause for a second, a bit confused by the outrageousness of the situation. “does being a pro-hero not pay well? is that why you resorted to stealing?” 

“these aren’t even for me they’re— wait, stealing? i am not stealing!” he answers back, visibly offended at the thought of being accused being a petty thief. 

you narrow your eyes at him, not convinced. 

“why would I steal? i’m not like those pathetic villains who go around shoplifting. hell, I could buy this entire store if I wanted to.” 

“ok then, big guy, why’d you shove the manga in your pockets and make a break for the exit, huh? explain that”, you push, still not believing him, even if he is the number 2 hero. 

“I was ‘making a break’ for the checkout counter, and as for the manga, I— that’s none of your business!” 

“ok then, i’ll just go get store security and make it their business”, you threaten. this causes bakugou to grab your arm, stopping you. 

damn it, he thinks to himself. it’s already enough that i’m in this shitty situation, I don’t need to cause a bigger misunderstanding by involving security. he sighs. fuck it. 

he finally decides to take out the manga from his pockets, showing you what he was really hiding: multiple volumes of various romance manga. 

“listen, i’m not stealing, I just— I thought i got caught buying these by a fan or something“, he looks away, his face red from embarrassment, but then changes his tone into one of frustration. “i wouldn’t have hidden them if you weren’t staring at me like a stalker!” 

it was your turn to be embarrassed. you didn’t realize you were hovering around him while waiting for him to leave. once again, you think to yourself, I hate my anxiety.  

“oh, um, about that…”, you say looking down, finding it hard to meet his intense red eyes now that your burst of confidence had completely fizzled out. “believe me when I say that I was not staring at you, or at least not intentionally. I was waiting for you to leave the manga section. i’m sorry if it seemed like i was stalking you, I didn’t mean to come off that way.” you pause. “you’re just really big and intimidating and I didn’t want to bother you while you were browsing. i really am sorry for causing this much trouble.” you confess, your face now burning after admitting that out loud. 

your confession only makes bakugou even more flustered, but now for a completely different reason, his face and ears burning red. big and intimidating? shit, I’m supposed to be improving my image. looking at you now, he can see that he towers over your short frame. the same short frame that’s fidgeting, obviously uncomfortable with this situation. your eyes are averting his even after being so bold a few moments ago. cute, he suddenly thinks. he sighs in frustration, both from the awkwardness this situation has turned into and the annoying thought that just popped into his head. he rubs the back of his neck, now feeling a bit guilty. 

“here,” you say reaching out for the manga in his hands. “let me pay for the manga. it’s the least I can do after accusing you of stealing and causing a scene.” 

like hell I’m letting you do that, he thinks to himself pulling away, not letting you grab the manga he’s carrying, much to your confusion. 

“you think paying for my manga is enough? you could’ve caused a scandal by involving security, I’m not letting you off that easily.” he reaches out, hand open, words not matching his true feelings. “give me your phone”, he demands gruffly, and you comply. what the fuck am I doing?, the rational part of him wonders. 

fuck it, he resolves with himself, throwing away his rationality as he unlocks your phone and proceeds to type something into it before giving it back to you. 

you look down at your phone to see a new contact added:

“manga thief”

0XX-XXX-XXXX

huh? 

you can’t do anything but stare down in disbelief at your phone. did he—pro-hero dynamight— just give me his number? 

you look up slightly, hoping for an explanation of sorts, but he doesn’t give any indication of intending to explain himself, instead pulling out his own phone and typing into it too. you assume he’s saving your number too, considering he texted himself from your phone. 

“hey!—“ he snaps, getting you to fully look up at him. “do me a favor and pick up when I call, got it?” he says, a mix of both aggressive and bashful before turning away and heading for the checkout counter, leaving you in a state of complete shock. 

what the fuck just happened? well…  there are worse things than aggressively receiving a certain grumpy pro-hero’s number, I guess, even at the cost of a peaceful day off. 

[pinkywildflower]

selfish | izuku midoriya

villain!izuku midoriya x gn!reader

word count: 1.2k

tw: angst, mentions of violence and death

a/n: villain izuku because i love pain

-

“stand down”

his voice mocked you. the very same voice that had comforted you, made you feel warm, and gave you hope. now it was nothing short of painful. it gave you a sick feeling in your stomach. you wanted to cry, scream out to the world for being so cruel, but you wouldn’t cry, not now. not for him, not for anyone, you’d worked too damn hard to let these lingering feelings get in the way. you would most certainly not stand down.

after what seemed like hours of fighting both the green haired man in front you and the initial rush of emotions that came with seeing him again, you finally willed yourself to really look at him.

his green curls were still as wild as ever, if not a little more unruly. his face was more defined, having lost the fullness in his cheeks. his eyes unsettled you the most. they were the same emerald green you remembered, but they were cold and severe, as if they were looking right through you. the only thing unchanged were the freckles on his face and his suit, which he’d slightly upgraded since high school.

you hadn’t realized you were in a daze until you heard a pained groan from beside you. your eyes snapped from izuku to your injured teammate. they’d gone down, along with the rest of the reinforcements, a while back, leaving you to deal with him alone.

you’d managed to zone out the bodies and destruction surrounding you at first, it was the only way you could think to keep yourself sane. sure, you were a pro hero and violence was part of the job, but it wasn’t the carnage that bothered you. it was the fact that he’d caused it.

he wasn’t the same dorky boy you’d known, and adored, back in high school. that boy was selfless, if not a little reckless, and dreamed of being a hero for the people. he’d been so sweet and caring towards everyone, making them feel like they belonged. it was that same warm nature that made you fall for him way back when, and you’d be lying if you said that you were completely over him.

but this man in front of you was not warm, or sweet, or anything that you’d known in high school. he was-

“dead, you’re supposed to be dead,” you finally manage out, keeping your guard up.

his stare didn’t falter, nor did his stance. he didn’t seem to be at all surprised by your statement, if anything you could see a flash of annoyance in his features, but that was gone as soon as it came.

finally, after a few moments of stillness, he let out a sigh, raking his hand through his hair.

“right, that was the story that they told the public, that I died that day. but as you can see,” he motioned to himself, “I’m still here.”

still here? what a funny way to put it.

“funny? how so?”

oh, you’d said that out loud.

not trusting yourself to keep your cool, you stayed silent. you hated that part of you that was relieved to see him here, alive. that part that just wants to run into his arms and feel him after years of mourning his death.

but you couldn’t, not after what he’d done. he was a villain for fucks sake. he killed and destroyed and you were supposed to take him down, not dwell of what was and what could’ve been.

when you didn’t say anything, he spoke up instead.

“well, I guess you were right at first. I did die that day, I died the moment the heroes decided that their image was far more important than doing what was right.”

this made you speak up.

“yes, because you have a much better idea of what’s right and wrong in this world. at least the heroes aren’t going around killing people. how many innocent lives have suffered because of your so called righteousness?”

“i’ll whatever it takes to achieve my goals, even if you don’t understand them,” he fired back.

he paused.

“although, i’d thought that you of all people would’ve,” he said softly. the look in his eyes changed, they weren’t filled with anger, they were sad, disappointed even.

he started to approached you and, for some odd reason, you let him. everything in your very being screamed at you to fight, to finish what your fallen fellow heroes had started, but izuku was right in front of you. he was right there and he wasn’t as insane as everyone made him out to be.

sure, he was still wrong, but his intentions were there. maybe you could talk to him, maybe-

your thoughts were cut off as he finally stood in front of you, only inches apart. you could feel the warmth coming off his body, his breath, his stare. the sad look in his eyes was still there, but for another reason, one you couldn’t quite place.

as if sensing your confusion, izuku raised a hand, bringing it to your face. you could feel the rough yet warm hand gently caressing your cheek, as if you’d break at any wrong movement. you leaned into his hand, not caring anymore. this was izuku, your izuku.

“you’re wrong,” he broke the silence. “I know what you’re thinking, but you’re wrong. i’m not backing down on this. this is something I have to do. nothing can change that, even you,” he hesitated, “but, just let me be selfish, just this once.”

you didn’t know what he meant, but you didn’t have the time to dwell on it before he leaned down, his lips touching yours softly. the kiss was slow but you could feel the longing, the hunger behind it. as if he’d been waiting for this exact moment, and as far as you were concerned, the feeling was mutual.

however, the kiss ended far too soon for your liking and you already missed the feeling of his lips against yours.

just as you were about to complain, he smiled down at you, a slight chuckle in his voice.

“i’ve been plenty selfish already, this is enough,” you looked up at him, his smile didn’t match his eyes. he seemed pained. “i’m sorry that I have to do this, but I can’t ruin you any more than I already have.”

“huh? what are you-“ you didn’t get to finish you sentence. you suddenly felt dizzy and you had a feeling izuku was responsible. in your few moments of consciousness, you cursed yourself for being so stupid.

as sleep overtook you, izuku took hold of your body, preventing you from falling to the hard ground. he then laid you down next to the other fallen heroes, making it seem like he’d taken you out too.

after a few moments of admiring your sleeping form, he quickly left the scene, leaving you behind once more. only now, with a lot more hesitance. he’d kissed you. he couldn’t ignore his feelings anymore, couldn’t save you from them, from him.

one day, once he’d finally reached his goals, once he finally achieved his justice, he’d go back for you. for now, however, he’d remember the feeling of your warmth and it would be enough.

or would it?

[pinkywildflower]

clingy | katsuki bakugou

katsuki bakugou x gn!reader

word count: 552

tw: none, just pure fluff

some clingy katsuki because i said so

a/n: for my book readers, i left a small reference hidden in there ;)

-

you were going to kill him

you’d been waiting for this book to come out for over a year now, even going as far as waking up super early to get it the second the book store opened. you’d lost sleep over this book and how the previous in the series ended on such a painful cliffhanger. hell, you couldn’t shut up about it and had ranted about it to katsuki to a point where he knew just as much as you did. which is why your current situation gives you have more reason to be pissed.

this man had the audacity to take your book from your hands? right as it was getting to the good part? not only that, he’d thrown it across the room and plopped right onto you afterwards, his bulky form preventing you from getting up to get it.

sure, it wasn’t uncomfortable or anything, as this was a common occurrence and you wouldn’t be complaining in any other situation, however, now he was in between you and your precious book.

“would you stop moving around so much?” you felt him grumble into your neck. his grip tightened around you.

“well, i want my book back, so I guess we’re both out of luck,” you fired back at him. he truly was a big baby sometimes.

this got him to sigh.

wait, what? where was his usual jab in retaliation?

“hey,” you softened your voice and brought your hands up to his hair, raking through his blond strands. “tough patrol?”

you felt him relax at the gesture as he grunted in agreement. ah, so that’s why he was being so clingy.

“you wanna talk about it?” he shook his head. yeah, he’s always preferred to ‘cuddle out’ his feelings, as you like to call it.

you’d been too caught up in your own world to notice something had been off today and he was too proud to say anything without you initiating the conversation. he’s well in his late 20s and yet he hasn’t changed much since high school.

yeah, he’s become a lot more open and affectionate, but he was still katsuki, and katsuki was an emotionally dense grump.

he was your emotionally dense grump.

“how about we go to our room? it’s a bit cramped on the couch,” he didn’t make any move to get up but he didn’t protest, a good sign.

finally, after a few long seconds, he lifted his head. his red eyes looking up at you. he looked tired.

“you can take your shitty book if you want,” he paused, looking away. “but i want to know what happened to june and day after the time-skip.”

before you could say anything, he’d already gotten up towards your shared room, leaving you stunned. you’d known that he had somewhat of an idea of the plot, but you hadn’t expected him to actually be invested.

you smiled to yourself. maybe he isn’t as dense as he makes himself out to be.

“would you hurry up? don’t make me come get you myself!” his voice sounded from upstairs.

tempting.

“yeah, yeah, stop rushing me!”

[pinkywildflower]

izuku meeting his photographer intern! s/o

izuku midoriya x short!reader

a/n: this was meant for a friend but it was too long so i had to post.

ok so you would be an intern at some big time studio working with some big time photographer who’s main job is to work with pro-heroes.

this was a once in a lifetime opportunity so you are very excited to say the least.

anyway, on this day in particular, you were tasked with assisting with yet another pro-hero’s promotional shoot but not just any hero, it was for pro-hero Deku.

he ended up being late because (unsurprisingly), he got caught up helping someone on the way.

other than that, he was an absolute sweetheart and treated everyone with respect, however, he had one problem: he was an awkward mess.

this man is not at all used to any kind of attention, especially when there are bright lights and cameras all in his direction.

not to mention the people constantly making sure his costume and face looks ok.

for him, this is more challenging than fighting any kind of villain.

because of this, the people in charge decide to take a short break in hopes that he can calm down enough to actually get things done.

that’s where you come in.

plot twist: you were the person he helped on the way to the studio.

you were fine but while you were on a coffee run some creep kept messing with you and he just so happened to be around to help you.

or at least that’s what he intended.

being a smaller person compared to the average population, creepy men who loved to take advantage of that were very common.

so before he could do anything you’d already spilled the coffee you were holding all over the guy in question (it was iced though, you weren’t trying to get a lawsuit for giving someone third degree burns)

you’d also given him a piece of your mind while you were at it.

Izuku was stunned to say the least (if not a bit amused)

the creep, however, was very pissed and was not afraid to show it.

he lunged at you the first chance he got, but Izuku didn’t give him a chance.

Izuku quickly apprehended the creep and called for someone to arrest him

he would’ve done so himself but he was already running late so he settled for making sure you were ok and handing off the creep to another pro in the area.

which brings us back to now, with you standing in the front entrance of the studio holding two drink carriers full of coffee (that you had to reorder since you’d spilled it the first time)

Izuku visibly perked up at the sight of you, not expecting to see you again.

however, he didn’t have the time to approach you since the 10 minute break had ended upon your arrival.

he instead went back to being the subject of dozens of cameras, except this time his smile didn’t seem so forced anymore.

if anything, the man was full on grinning, all while looking directly at you.

just the memory of you spilling coffee and cursing out a man half your size was truly a sight to behold.

hell, he’d had a hard time not bursting into laughter back at the coffee shop.

meanwhile, you were freaking out.

was he making fun of you?

was he just seriously amazing at modeling?

you couldn’t stop yourself from thinking of hundreds of self deprecating and anxious thoughts.

you knew who he was back at the coffeeshop and you knew that you’d be working with him today (you’d purposely taken your time on the way to the studio out of sheer embarrassment)

regardless, after an agonizingly long shoot, it was finally over and Izuku had done an amazing job compared to before.

such a good job in fact that the main photographer was very curious as to what had changed in such a short time.

“oh, nothing really, I just thought of something funny,” he’d answered while rubbing the back of his head.

oh

OH

funny?

he thought that was funny?

however, before your inner thoughts could go any further, Izuku had already made his way towards you.

god he truly was beautiful

“i didn’t get to make sure were fully ok back at the coffee shop.”

“as you can see, I’m fine. i hope me defending myself was enough entertainment for you,” you’d said quite annoyed.

that made him panic.

“no, wait, that’s not what I meant. I mean yes it was funny, but you were really brave and cool and-,” he started to ramble.

this made you laugh

he was beautiful and cute.

“it’s ok, it’s ok, really. I get comments about my height all the time and I guess that spilling a drink on some creep is funny.”

he seemed relieved but you could tell he still felt bad.

“well, since you seem so concerned about making sure I’m ok, how about we get some drinks? I can’t promise I won’t spill though,” you said teasing him.

This made him smile.

“I’d love that. And don’t worry-“ he leaned close to your ear, “that won’t be necessary.”

rip