pirates-and-candles

[pirates-and-candles]

Fresh off the market this ->🐕 little dog now only $4.99! Get in quick!

[pirates-and-candles]

Hey im gana leave my dog here can you keep her safe?🐕

yes yes of course i will keep your dog safe

[pirates-and-candles]

Tshirt idea I had

[pirates-and-candles]

my great-grandfather had to leave italy in the 20′s because he hit a fascist with a tuba, so if you think I am going to take this sitting down you are going to have to catch these hands and also this tuba

[pirates-and-candles]

Sorry I Spent all mY spoons this week already and it's fucking Tuesday. We're heading to the knives

[pirates-and-candles]

Theodule lives the garrison life... Montreuil-Sur-Mer is a garrison town... I'm connecting the two dots

[pirates-and-candles]

I was teaching kids today and they got fixated on the usual ‘are they dead now?’ question when I was talking about historical figures. So I was just like ‘Yes, they’re dead now, everyone who was alive in the 1800s is dead now.’ and then one kid was like ‘Except for you’.

[pirates-and-candles]

Good morning Mr. Jigsaw I noticed that this trap has a time limit of 60 minutes but as per my accommodations through the school Center of Disability Resources I get time and a half on exams and quizzes is that still something I can apply to this game right now? Thank you for understanding have a nice day

[pirates-and-candles]

the difference between cats and dogs is that dogs' front paws are Extra Feet For Running Faster And More And Better, while cats' front paws are Hands For Committing Mischief And Investigating

[pirates-and-candles]

i'm trying to flirt with this noblewoman but she keeps asking me to demonstrate my flawless sword technique and i don't think she realizes how much effort i'm putting in to make my tits bounce while doing so

[pirates-and-candles]

convincing this wandering swordmaster (loser, woman) to keep demonstrating her flawless technique to cleave a man from his life for me because her tits bounce really lewdly whenever she does it and she hasn't noticed yet

[pirates-and-candles]

they need to start making clothes out of material that can clean glasses well again

[pirates-and-candles]

+ screencap redraw

[pirates-and-candles]

I'm kind of obsessed with the way sheep are handled. So efficiently. It always looks kind of unpleasant at first and then you notice the sheep are fine with it. They're always being flipped upside down and rolled down a chute or some shit. A shepherd will be tossing that thang in the air and spinning it like pizza dough & the sheep just lets it happen

[pirates-and-candles]

me when i have to put proper citations: ugh this is so annoying who even cares what i do in the footnotes

me when i can't find a source because it hasn't been quoted correctly: i am going to track down the authors and they will answer to me. i will find out who caused this suffering. there will be blood.