playertwx-blog - Tumblr blog

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Important -Going On Hiatus-

Hey everyone! It’s Vagabond, and I have a few things I need to let you know. Currently, I’m going through what might be the biggest writing block I’ve ever experienced in my entire life. It’s almost painful to me as an aspiring author and lover of roleplaying, but when I sit down to write lately it has become very, very difficult. You may know me on a lot of different blogs and are wondering if I’m putting all of them on hiatus, and the answer is almost, but not quite all. Key:  Hiatus (only coming on to look at dash and like posts, maybe send and reblog memes to answer much later, but not roleplaying for the time being) Semi-Hiatus (not replying to a whole lot, but doing some easier stuff for me to do) No Hiatus (self explanatory) Here’s a list: @namelessxsamurai  : Hiatus @bxrning-trees: Semi-Hiatus @auraisms: Hiatus @playertwx: Semi-Hiatus @bonemarrowoflife: No Hiatus @princess-unikitti: Hiatus wilt (cant @): Hiatus @thepumpkin-king: No Hiatus @affaxnatta: No Hiatus @deadlegacy: Semi-hiatus I hope you all understand that I’m going through a lot right now, trying to get through summer school to retrieve missing credit and dealing with an exceedingly toxic home environment and aren’t too upset by my decision. Thank you, so much for being patient with me !

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Hi! I'm still here. I've been busy!

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badsciencebanner:

Do me a favor. Reblog this if you welcome the use of ask memes as icebreakers between characters that have never, or rarely, interacted before.

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*sitting down, having a normal ass day* ............................................................................ *gAAAAAAAAAAASP* I COULD MAKE A NEIL PERRY FROM DEAD POET’S SOCIETY

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me: dont make every interaction with a jeremy be gay also me: ................................................sounds fake

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           ❛ mhm, mhm, just as I suspected. jake, bro...welcome to the pining for an oblivious boy club. it is...not always easy, but i can show you the ropes. ❜ a pause.             ❛ ooooor you can tell him as soon as possible to avoid the pining part altogether. ❜

MICHAEL.

            ❛ oh I see where this is going. who is it, dude? ❜

            ❛ uh … ❜ there was a short pause as he tried to find a way to describe the boy without giving it away immediately.  ❛ . . .small rooster. ❜

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            ❛ oh I see where this is going. who is it, dude? ❜

                        — (  @playertwx  |  sc  ) —

             ❛ say there’s this person you pass in the hall EVERYDAY ; you’ve known him since 7th grade… ❜

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♪

         ❛ sittin’ pretty in the prime of life. ❜

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Send me '♪' and I'll put my iTunes on shuffle and take a random line from the song and make a starter.

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           ❛ waaaaaaaaaaaterrrrrrr, heck yeah. water sounds like god damn heaven right now. yo, yo, yo, yo...     i should like...              call jeremy.  ❜

“Why is the room spinning?”

          ❝  maybe because you drak too much at that damn party. here, you need to lie down. i’ll get you water. ❞

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      » » » ‣   The banging was gone now. There was no clanging noise in his head...it wasn’t loud. The only sound was Jeremy...and Jeremy was so soft, and so kind sounding in comparison. A few more slow, deep breaths are taken and he’s in a much better place than he was when he called...but he was still...shaken. He knew that it was a lot for Jeremy to come all the way over, walking, just for him...but...he knew he needed it. ❛ T-That would be...really...That would really help. I’m sorry, man, I hate...I hate asking this of you... ❜                                He hated that he was making Jeremy go through so much effort just to stop him from being such a sensitive prick. Sometimes, Michael was confident...but other times, he hated himself over everything else. Seriously, he really did...and it made him miserable. God, he wished that all that joking and all that happy attitude and all that optimism was always there and it was all that he was but Jesus, he had this layer of self-doubt and anger and misery that was always rotting underneath. It made that God-Forsaken lump in his throat grow twice as big and suffocating when he thought about it. ❛ God, I’m such a loser... ❜                         The words are muttered, like he didn’t even realize he’d said it out loud. He’s got one hand on the phone and the other is up, covering his eyes now as a fresh brand of tears begin to form and fall from his eyes. Why couldn’t his breakdowns be quicker?   

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       » » » ‣   He felt eerily vulnerable, right now. In the middle of the night, talking to someone close to him…It made him feel vulnerable, really. He was letting someone who he saw every day see a side to him he hated showing. He knew that truthfully, Jeremy cared and gave a shit and that’s why he had called in the first place, but…God, he still felt like a huge sensitive baby for this. The moment Jeremy told him he didn’t need to apologize, tears had finally escaped his eyes and begun rolling down his cheeks. ❛ Y-yeah, okay, okay…I’m…deep breaths, listen to your voice. I can…I can do this… ❜                                He took a few, oddly silent deep breaths, starting kind of quick and hasty but as he listened to Jeremy trying to talk him through this, his breathing slowed and his heart wasn’t pounding so damn hard anymore. It wasn’t until he’d calmed down, that his crying became audible, surprisingly. Instead of breathing and whimpering, he was…softly sobbing on the other end of the phone. He let himself do so for a few minutes, before he took in another shaky, louder breath. He had to remind himself…he wasn’t Michael In The Bathroom, anymore. He wasn’t Michael Flying Solo. He was Michael, Jeremy’s Best Friend.  ❛ In my dream, I… ❜                         He paused again. Should he say this? He knew it wasn’t really about what was going on in the dream…more the feelings it gave him…but he had to tell Jeremy. He wanted someone to know what he was seeing that was keeping him up so often and keeping him so broken.   ❛ I was alone. And…and you weren’t there, and nobody was there, and…there was this sound and… It was like…knocking… But it was loud, and it was mixed with banging and clanging and it kept getting louder and louder and louder And nothing could drown it out, not my headphones or anything… It was so loud, Jeremy. It was so…It was so loud… And it was in my head. It was like….b…bouncing around in my head and it made my t-..teeth vibrate and- God, Jeremy, It’s terrifying !! ❜    

“You can do this. Deep breaths. You’re okay.” 

Muttered in repetition, acutely aware of his friend’s voice from the other line, listening for any shift in tone– be it for better or worse. Sound is the only clue Jeremy has as to Michael’s current state, and while he’s confident in his knowledge of his best friend, it’s still difficult to pick up on vocal cues when overcome by worry. Only when he hears the slowed breathing does his frame relax, shoulders dropping as he lets out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. 

He’s silent as Michael speaks up once more, letting him take a moment to gather his thoughts. If it would make him feel better to talk about what had him so worked up, Jeremy was more than happy to listen, but he also wasn’t going to rush him into speaking. Whatever Michael needed, he was there for him. 

Oh– his chest aches as Michael explains. Normally so vivacious, so utterly helpless. 

“H-hey, Michael, it’s okay. The banging, it’s– it’s gone now.   You’re– you’re okay, you’re not alone anymore. I’m here,    I’m not gonna leave you alone.” 

The word ‘again’ is left unspoken, his throat feels tight. Some best friend you are, Jeremy.

“Would it– would it help if I came over? I could walk, stay on   the phone until I get there.” 

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❛ I HAVE MADE A MISTAAAAAAAAAAAKE. ❜

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☆ did you ever think about getting your own squip?

❛ Of course I did. Especially that party...stuck in that bathroom, by myself. I thought maybe I could just...be cooler and get Jeremy to stay with me...But I didn’t. You know what kills me, still, to this day? I didn’t stop because I realized it was dangerous...I stopped because I chickened out. I’m still awful. ❜

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⭐ are you in love with Jeremy? (Can't get the right symbol)

     » » » ‣  ...Fuck.                  Michael took a deep breath, looking at the ground and back up, before he seemed to get kinda shaky. This was a risk that he took, agreeing to tell the truth about things.                   Briefly, he thought about Jeremy...and he knew he couldn’t dance around it.❛ Yeah. Yeah, I am. ❜

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☆ + if you could change one thing about jeremy, not things hes done but him himself, what would you change?

❛ To be honest, dude...I wish Jeremy didn’t think so little of himself. I would change the way he views himself and the way he stresses so hard over what other people say about him. He’s really, really cool and I just wish he could see that.  ❜            

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☆ + how do you feel about christine? knowing how jeremy feels about her, i mean.

❛ I mean...she’s pretty and all, but I’m not like...into her, if that’s what you’re wondering?But just as a person...she seems passionate about a lot of stuff, and I can get that !! I tend to get kinda excited about stuff, too. I think maybe we could be good friends, but sometimes I get a little...I don’t know. Weird- when Jeremy obsesses over her. ❜