polkadotzavala

[polkadotzavala]

debbie downer and negative nancy should lez out

[polkadotzavala]

rudyard funn character of all time. he has a persecution complex. everyone is actually out to get him. those two facts are not related. hes like 5"2. he threw his rival off a waterfall and gave him grapes afterwards. he likes spreadsheets. his best friend is a mouse. his first response to any situation is to scream and cry. he fell down a well. hes asexual. he posed in a naked calendar to preserve his work schedule. one of his enemies is a parrot. hes good with kids. he brought cooked rice to a wedding. he builds furniture for mice. hes shit at acting. his first friend used him to try and blow up the town. he got kicked out of boy scouts. he got framed as a serial killer. he broke instagram. his kettle is stolen from the council. he dissolved a corpse by accident. he hates corpses. he owns a funeral home. hes 35.

[polkadotzavala]

The real reason why you need to be social is the best chinese place within 10 miles is an unknown hole in the wall with a yearly marketing budget of $15 dollars and you will never, ever find it unless someone tells you about it.

[polkadotzavala]

(cant remember the expression "bit off more than i could chew") guess i really sucked off more than i could swallow huh

[polkadotzavala]

I wish they could invent a medical device that temporarily transfers your symptoms and pain to the doctor treating you and it worked like a shock collar. “I think light exercise would-.” and then bam they’re rolling around the floor clutching their stomach in agony and dry heaving.

[polkadotzavala]

i am saved by the healing power of stairway to heaven live at madison square gardens july 27 1973

[polkadotzavala]

save me sports yuri save me

[polkadotzavala]

they should invent an apartment that has huge windows but is never too hot and is near everything i like and all my friends but is also quiet when i want it to be and costs zero dollars or perhaps they pay me to live in. and they save it just for me so i dont have to look for it :)

[polkadotzavala]

i listen to the cure and have an autism to autism direct mind link with robert smith

[polkadotzavala]

the character

[polkadotzavala]

i love carly rae jepson's hit 2015 album emotion as much as the next music gay BUT you guys gotta start putting crj songs that arent on emotion on your character playlists

[polkadotzavala]

fandom is really cool actually sometimes you meet people that just fuckin rule and it's because you both want the same two fictional women to kiss on the mouth

[polkadotzavala]

a part of being proactive about how you communicate with all types of people is having the ability to realize when the person or people across from you don’t understand what you are telling them, and then having the ability to explain it differently, explain the wider cultural context they might be missing, or use simpler vocabulary

[polkadotzavala]

some of you aren’t even perverts you just have normal sexual desires that you are ashamed of

[polkadotzavala]

wobub wubba hirl

[polkadotzavala]

so it turns out that time actually does go by faster as you get older. just like how adults told me it would when i was younger. pisses me off

[polkadotzavala]

my first favorite hobby is yapping. second is being extremely quiet and not talking ever at all ever.