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“i’m not the same as who i was before [x] thing happened to me” does it help to know that you would not have stayed that person regardless

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damn people rly hate type 2 diabetics don't they

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i was at an event last night in california and i went to the bar to order wine bc wine was like, a thing, and i looked at the menu and saw i was completely out of my depth bc idk any wine names, so i turned to my right and there was a man in a gorgeous suit standing at the bar beside me and i said “do you know anything about wine?” and he said “a little, yes!” i told him i liked white and dry wines and asked if he’d order for me. he asked the server for two glasses and had one poured for each of us and then he clinked his glass on mine but he didn’t take a sip, he just watched me taste mine and then he asked what i thought and i said “it’s pretty good, but like i said, i wouldn’t know.” he laughed and told me to have a good time & i walked away. fifteen minutes later i found out he’s the winemaker.

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Michael Banning, Light at the Top of the Stairs, 2024, Oil on canvas over panel

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streamer & youtuber RPF: this makes sense, most streamers are a subset of comedian and acting gay with your friends as a joke is very popular with straight men, leading to a lot of fuel for the fire.

kpop RPF: prettyboys that are usually contractually obligated to avoid public relationships, which renders them very available for shipping. i can see how we got here.

men's hockey & wrestling RPF: contact sports.

beatles RPF: insert paul mccartney group jerk off session story.

formula 1 RPF: yeah im still trying to figure this one out. no clue lads. good for them though.

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playing undertale at last after somehow unintentionally avoiding all major spoilers for my entire online life (UT came out two years before I first used social media) and oh my god. this game is crazycool. lifechanging. I kind of want that gay robot

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I wouldn't need pronouns if bitches weren't talking about me behind my back

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unreliable narrator but it's just an aromantic writing romance

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I've been doing a lot of thinking about my family and how I was treated as a child, and honestly, my father has never seemed more amazing in my eyes.

I used to love Luigi(Mario's brother) when I was little. Like, he was my favorite character ever, and I had multiple plushies of him. Didn't give a fuck about Mario, vaguely tolerated Peach, but I loved Luigi.

On my first day of kindergarten, my dad gave me the number for his work phone and said it was Luigi's phone number. "If anything happens at school, call Luigi."And not even twenty minutes into my first day, I was having a panic attack. So I went down to the principal's office and called "Luigi."

Now, at the time, my father was in a meeting with his manager and his supervisor, along with most of his coworkers. And when I called, he picked up before he even left the room.

And he put on a very awful Italian accent and said, "Itsa me, Luigi! Whatsa the matter?"In front of his boss and coworkers. Without telling them what was going on. So they were absolutely bewildered, and he carried on like they didn't even exist. He only explained what was happening after I had calmed down and hung up, to which most of them responded with "Aww, cute."

I continued to call him whenever I got upset at school, and eventually his coworkers got in on it. I distinctly remember one of them impersonating Toad. I don't know why I'm telling you this, I just thought it might make you smile :)

this is so delightful I love your Luigi dad

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its fascinating when shows go "this character does not have sex" and you can just watch the fans minds just start going "well he doesnt have sex, therefore hes asexual, and as we all know, asexuality is a spectrum, and some asexuals actualy do have sex, and therefore he is probably having tons of crazy sex literaly every time he isnt on screen"

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Being an adult in this recession and being like wow I am totally "splurging" on 3 new sets of cotton underwear and 3 pairs of socks like whoaaaaa hold your horses duke of the land where's all this money gonna come from

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observation: among a certain subset of tumblr users, the term “blorbo” has become unchic, but the concept it describes is still important; and so it has been replaced with “The Character”

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Spin this wheel first and then this wheel second to generate the title of a YA fantasy novel!

(If the second wheel lands on an option ending with a plus sign, spin it again)

Share what you got!

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mold pisses me off so much

oh you have to eat your produce the moment it leaves the store or the fuckin Hungering Dust will get it. and. poison your food