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"I told you this homework made no sense." Severus said, smirk in place. "At least the interpretations are in letters: I've heard horror stories from the Ancient Runes class." He said, letting her copy in peace. Thankfully due to how many interpretations there were Divination was an easy class to cut corners with. It gave him time to study for his real classes while he was at it. With that he pulled out his old book and started eyeing over it again to kill the boredom.

"What about your friends?" He asked, still set out to figure out why she seemed so worried all the time. "Have they said what they're doing after they're done studying?" For all that was worth the question was for her, but asking about all her friends in general tended to make that sound less like he was about to start stalking her like a madman for his future plans; he best avoid doing that if it was in any way possible. Currently it didn't seem so, but things could change.

Severus simply nodded, keeping his skepticism to himself too. If she didn’t want to tell him now she wouldn’t, but he would eventually figure it out. “The professor wants us to light up a candle and interpret wax within a proper trance. So naturally we looked up the signs and made something up.” He said, grabbing a book and handing it over. “Just open it, pick one, make up a story and stick to it. Easy O” he said, obviously quite proud of their hard work- or lack thereof.

The homework would be easy, it was figuring out how to get Lily to stop worrying about everyone and everything that was going to be tricky. That is, aside from Severus’ obvious resort: To distract her as much as he physically could. Be it homework or hanging out, or even just talking about nothing of importance: Eventually she should be able to relax, but no better way to do it than to reach the root of the problem and eradicate it, if possible.

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“What’s the difference? You show me a guideline to properly divinate something and I’ll do it. Tell me to stare at a candle for five minutes as it melts and then write a foot of parchment about it and I’ll make it up.”  He protested, letting her steer him away from the Great Hall to, presumably, waste time. “What I can’t believe is that you actually do it.” he said, showing her his own foot of parchment and putting the interpretations on the table so she could, at least, have the option of copying it.

Severus leaned over, if anything to coax her not to be so loud about this. “They mentioned Rockwood is officially in, I think that’s load.” He said. Mention it? They talked about it in the dorms mostly and followed it carefully. They were convinced the teachers were not letting them as in on it as they should and that there was an agenda to keep students from choosing: So yes, they talked about it. “I know Black’s up to her eyes in it, but nobody talks about that.” He looked up to Madam Prince’s general direction then leaned closer to Lily. “If you ask me, nobody needs to talk about her to know.” He added; she was practically pedaling it.

“But this is all theory and grapevine.” He finished; she was a Gryffindor and a prefect: Both which made it an extraordinarily bad idea to go into detail about illicit school activities. It definitely wasn’t in his best interest to say more than that.

Severus simply nodded, keeping his skepticism to himself too. If she didn’t want to tell him now she wouldn’t, but he would eventually figure it out. “The professor wants us to light up a candle and interpret wax within a proper trance. So naturally we looked up the signs and made something up.” He said, grabbing a book and handing it over. “Just open it, pick one, make up a story and stick to it. Easy O” he said, obviously quite proud of their hard work- or lack thereof.

The homework would be easy, it was figuring out how to get Lily to stop worrying about everyone and everything that was going to be tricky. That is, aside from Severus’ obvious resort: To distract her as much as he physically could. Be it homework or hanging out, or even just talking about nothing of importance: Eventually she should be able to relax, but no better way to do it than to reach the root of the problem and eradicate it, if possible.

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Severus simply nodded, keeping his skepticism to himself too. If she didn’t want to tell him now she wouldn’t, but he would eventually figure it out. “The professor wants us to light up a candle and interpret wax within a proper trance. So naturally we looked up the signs and made something up.” He said, grabbing a book and handing it over. “Just open it, pick one, make up a story and stick to it. Easy O” he said, obviously quite proud of their hard work- or lack thereof.

The homework would be easy, it was figuring out how to get Lily to stop worrying about everyone and everything that was going to be tricky. That is, aside from Severus’ obvious resort: To distract her as much as he physically could. Be it homework or hanging out, or even just talking about nothing of importance: Eventually she should be able to relax, but no better way to do it than to reach the root of the problem and eradicate it, if possible.

“Lily why is it I think you’re worrying yourself to death again?” Severus asked, eyeing her once before giving Avery and Mulciber a skeptical look. Somehow he doubted she would simply explain the reasons she fretted the way she did to him, much less do so in few simple words he wouldn’t discard as unnecessary, but at least when she did he could mostly tell she was doing it.

“I don’t expect you to have more control over your friends as you do mine, Lily, if that’s what messing with you” He said. “And I actually finished the homework for Divination, so that I can help you out with.” He added, very willing to put his friend’s effort into a card he could play as a means to hang out, why ever not? “Now eat something before you make yourself sick to boot.”

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“Lily why is it I think you’re worrying yourself to death again?” Severus asked, eyeing her once before giving Avery and Mulciber a skeptical look. Somehow he doubted she would simply explain the reasons she fretted the way she did to him, much less do so in few simple words he wouldn’t discard as unnecessary, but at least when she did he could mostly tell she was doing it.

“I don’t expect you to have more control over your friends as you do mine, Lily, if that’s what messing with you” He said. “And I actually finished the homework for Divination, so that I can help you out with.” He added, very willing to put his friend’s effort into a card he could play as a means to hang out, why ever not? “Now eat something before you make yourself sick to boot.”

“No, I’ll catch up with them later” He dismissed, raising a hand to gesture a dismissive greeting to them, only to catch Mulciber’s confused expression as he muttered a slow ‘Okay’ at Avery as they gestured once and started talking between them: No doubt figuring out how to stage a proper intervention to rescue him. “I’m going to be honest to you, Lily.” He said, calm enough now that she was, at least, talking to him. “I’ll be nice; but McKinnon needs to keep off.” He leveled, not about to be trampled by another problem like Potter.

He already had days to figure out how to not antagonize his room-mates, how to not antagonize Potter and how to not antagonize Lily; all in a balance, while keeping a semblance of peace: He was not about to deal with McKinnon on top of it all. She would not be a problem as long as Lily employed the magic words of please, thank you and step off. Potter wouldn’t be a concern as long as he dominated the art of walking in public a lot and his room-mates would have to be dealt with as they approached.

All in all, this would be easy.

“Will you be alright?” He asked, in all seriousness. He hadn’t just pulled her hair next to that tree; he’d called her something horrible and he didn’t want her to internalize it as anywhere near true.

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“No, I’ll catch up with them later” He dismissed, raising a hand to gesture a dismissive greeting to them, only to catch Mulciber’s confused expression as he muttered a slow ‘Okay’ at Avery as they gestured once and started talking between them: No doubt figuring out how to stage a proper intervention to rescue him. “I’m going to be honest to you, Lily.” He said, calm enough now that she was, at least, talking to him. “I’ll be nice; but McKinnon needs to keep off.” He leveled, not about to be trampled by another problem like Potter.

He already had days to figure out how to not antagonize his room-mates, how to not antagonize Potter and how to not antagonize Lily; all in a balance, while keeping a semblance of peace: He was not about to deal with McKinnon on top of it all. She would not be a problem as long as Lily employed the magic words of please, thank you and step off. Potter wouldn’t be a concern as long as he dominated the art of walking in public a lot and his room-mates would have to be dealt with as they approached.

All in all, this would be easy.

“Will you be alright?” He asked, in all seriousness. He hadn’t just pulled her hair next to that tree; he’d called her something horrible and he didn’t want her to internalize it as anywhere near true.

Now that he had half his foot in, Severus realized the many ways he could screw this up. Given the restrictions there were many ways this could go wrong: Way too many, especially when she involved Potter in the conversation. He told himself that this wasn’t about him but all he could think was that Potter was much closer to her than he was and it was enough to make this part of the agreement a difficult one. Difficult but not impossible and he wasn’t about to let Potter outdo him for such a simple advantage.

“You know I can hardly control what these morons do, Lily.” He pressed, knowing he was pushing his luck. Watching over his steps was one thing, telling the guys what to do was another animal altogether. Especially at a time when most of their class was talking about changes in loyalties and the ‘old ways’ to be defended and all that rubbish he just knew Lily ‘loved’ with all her hatred. It only made stabbing them in the back in one single step all the easier for him in order to obtain what he wanted. “As for me, I can control what I do, though. Isn’t that enough?”

Which was how easily it came down to that: He wanted Lily and there was very little he wouldn’t do to accomplish his ends.

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Now that he had half his foot in, Severus realized the many ways he could screw this up. Given the restrictions there were many ways this could go wrong: Way too many, especially when she involved Potter in the conversation. He told himself that this wasn’t about him but all he could think was that Potter was much closer to her than he was and it was enough to make this part of the agreement a difficult one. Difficult but not impossible and he wasn’t about to let Potter outdo him for such a simple advantage.

“You know I can hardly control what these morons do, Lily.” He pressed, knowing he was pushing his luck. Watching over his steps was one thing, telling the guys what to do was another animal altogether. Especially at a time when most of their class was talking about changes in loyalties and the ‘old ways’ to be defended and all that rubbish he just knew Lily ‘loved’ with all her hatred. It only made stabbing them in the back in one single step all the easier for him in order to obtain what he wanted. “As for me, I can control what I do, though. Isn’t that enough?”

Which was how easily it came down to that: He wanted Lily and there was very little he wouldn’t do to accomplish his ends.

“Again, I can only try” he frowned, what were they telling her in that common room? He could only imagine, seeing how well-informed her good friend was right now. His anger decided to return again, after she’d drained the fight out of him so completely and he would at least get a point across if he was going down “It’s not like I’m wearing the Dark Mark and have killed muggles left and right, Lily” He reasoned. “But if you think I’m that hopeless then maybe you know that better than I do.” He added. The last thing he wanted was to argue but if she was that convinced then there was little other he could do.

“And that’s what it comes down to, isn’t it? Tell me, Lily, how far did I have to fall before I no longer deserved another chance?” He needed to tone it down, a part of him was saying. He needed to be patient and not adopt a tone with her, but it wasn’t easy and he wasn’t perfect; as she did so well to remind him. “Sure I’m not proud of what I told you, but has it really come to the point where you won’t hear it from me?” He added, finally reigning that not-so-gentle opinion on that.

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“Again, I can only try” he frowned, what were they telling her in that common room? He could only imagine, seeing how well-informed her good friend was right now. His anger decided to return again, after she’d drained the fight out of him so completely and he would at least get a point across if he was going down “It’s not like I’m wearing the Dark Mark and have killed muggles left and right, Lily” He reasoned. “But if you think I’m that hopeless then maybe you know that better than I do.” He added. The last thing he wanted was to argue but if she was that convinced then there was little other he could do.

“And that’s what it comes down to, isn’t it? Tell me, Lily, how far did I have to fall before I no longer deserved another chance?” He needed to tone it down, a part of him was saying. He needed to be patient and not adopt a tone with her, but it wasn’t easy and he wasn’t perfect; as she did so well to remind him. “Sure I’m not proud of what I told you, but has it really come to the point where you won’t hear it from me?” He added, finally reigning that not-so-gentle opinion on that.

The pain that invaded him from that confirmation that it was over with Lily managed it’s way to his face for a good few seconds until Marlene opened her mouth at him. She seemed to be who dragged Lily to see him, probably in the mood to torment him now that she could freely do it. His delusions that his day could not, possibly, get any worse were destroyed the second Lily confirmed that for all his plotting and scheming and all he could do any later, he was still not getting her friendship back.

‘I was addressing the ringleader, not the animals’ was not likely to go over well, but the look Severus was giving him was likely having the same effect anyway. What wasn’t likely to go according to plan was that Lily would leave thinking that he was going to conform with that silence she was feeding him. “I don’t owe you any explanations for who I talk to, McKinnon” He snapped at her, anger clear on his expression. The warning was well placed too, he was not in the mood for her to come between a conversation that had nothing to do with her.

“And for your information me and my friends apologize to whomever we want”. He added, clearly not about to take her crap. He would, however, do well on that threat as another plan occurred to him: If he didn’t want to take it from McKinnon and if she wasn’t going to let Lily talk then he would have to pull Lily away from her to do it. With that he made his way past Lily’s friend and addressed her, seeing as Marlene was clearly below his attention. “If you have to tell me something, tell me, I don’t have patience for this grapevine thing, and you know it.” He said, gesturing at her to follow him, then glaring at Marlene for good measure.

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“What do you want me to tell you, Lily?” He said, tone clearly indicating that he didn’t know what she wanted from him. “I meant it, if that’s what you need to hear. I meant to apologize, I regret what I said, I would have taken it back and I can’t. What else could I offer you?”He asked, legitimately asked, though he doubted he could do any better than that. He was willing to do it, though, and he was already plotting on how to take actions to do so; but for that to happen Lily had to forgive him, or at least let him get close enough again so that he could do it.

That wasn’t likely to happen. Instead he resigned himself to the idea that he was likely to have to watch what he could fix but wasn’t allowed to try and simply backseat James Potter, whom he didn’t think he even had the mental strength to allow himself to envision right then. He’d have time to obsess over James as he likely approached Lily later, not now, not while he could help thinking about him.

“If it’s any consolation; I’m willing to try.” He added, at risk of seeming all the more an idiot standing there in front of her when he had nothing useful or truly constructive to say.

The pain that invaded him from that confirmation that it was over with Lily managed it’s way to his face for a good few seconds until Marlene opened her mouth at him. She seemed to be who dragged Lily to see him, probably in the mood to torment him now that she could freely do it. His delusions that his day could not, possibly, get any worse were destroyed the second Lily confirmed that for all his plotting and scheming and all he could do any later, he was still not getting her friendship back.

‘I was addressing the ringleader, not the animals’ was not likely to go over well, but the look Severus was giving him was likely having the same effect anyway. What wasn’t likely to go according to plan was that Lily would leave thinking that he was going to conform with that silence she was feeding him. “I don’t owe you any explanations for who I talk to, McKinnon” He snapped at her, anger clear on his expression. The warning was well placed too, he was not in the mood for her to come between a conversation that had nothing to do with her.

“And for your information me and my friends apologize to whomever we want”. He added, clearly not about to take her crap. He would, however, do well on that threat as another plan occurred to him: If he didn’t want to take it from McKinnon and if she wasn’t going to let Lily talk then he would have to pull Lily away from her to do it. With that he made his way past Lily’s friend and addressed her, seeing as Marlene was clearly below his attention. “If you have to tell me something, tell me, I don’t have patience for this grapevine thing, and you know it.” He said, gesturing at her to follow him, then glaring at Marlene for good measure.

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The pain that invaded him from that confirmation that it was over with Lily managed it's way to his face for a good few seconds until Marlene opened her mouth at him. She seemed to be who dragged Lily to see him, probably in the mood to torment him now that she could freely do it. His delusions that his day could not, possibly, get any worse were destroyed the second Lily confirmed that for all his plotting and scheming and all he could do any later, he was still not getting her friendship back.

'I was addressing the ringleader, not the animals' was not likely to go over well, but the look Severus was giving him was likely having the same effect anyway. What wasn't likely to go according to plan was that Lily would leave thinking that he was going to conform with that silence she was feeding him. “I don't owe you any explanations for who I talk to, McKinnon” He snapped at her, anger clear on his expression. The warning was well placed too, he was not in the mood for her to come between a conversation that had nothing to do with her.

“And for your information me and my friends apologize to whomever we want”. He added, clearly not about to take her crap. He would, however, do well on that threat as another plan occurred to him: If he didn't want to take it from McKinnon and if she wasn't going to let Lily talk then he would have to pull Lily away from her to do it. With that he made his way past Lily's friend and addressed her, seeing as Marlene was clearly below his attention. “If you have to tell me something, tell me, I don't have patience for this grapevine thing, and you know it.” He said, gesturing at her to follow him, then glaring at Marlene for good measure.

He wasn’t going to stay there looking at that fat painting like that, not after what was said and much less when it wasn’t going to do anything, he was sixteen, there was not sitting that still. What it did, however, was degrade into a terrible mood that sort of leaked…

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Little after finishing his divination assignment which supposedly predicted perseverance and hard work, something he was hoping his professor overlooked as she always did, Severus simply started making his way to the great hall. That he happened to find Lily as he was doing this was a mere testament to his usually bad fortune. That he did so when she was flanked by her friends was a testament to an unusually unfortunate streak he was displaying since recently.

Were it not for that flanking of friends and allies Severus could have even tried apologizing to her again. As it was, he knew that not only was she not going to believe him; but he was probably going to be eviscerated for his sins.

They approached him and he simply let them, forming a plan in his mind; most of it involved him remaining silent and letting them speak; best to know what the others had to say before he even tried to make a defense against the same group of girls who oftentimes would tell Lily all they thought of him with little to no mercy on him or what chances others would give him for redemption by now.

“Lily” he greeted distantly, if anything for her not to yell at him for greeting her as if nothing had happened. Then again with girls nobody knew what would set them off.

He wasn’t going to stay there looking at that fat painting like that, not after what was said and much less when it wasn’t going to do anything, he was sixteen, there was not sitting that still. What it did, however, was degrade into a terrible mood that sort of leaked...

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Sort of an opening

He wasn’t going to stay there looking at that fat painting like that, not after what was said and much less when it wasn’t going to do anything, he was sixteen, there was not sitting that still. What it did, however, was degrade into a terrible mood that sort of leaked off him by the time he was in his own common room the way only teenagers knew how. It was a strange mix of sadness and, oddly enough, anger. The last thing he needed was to face the mutts, the rat and the idiot at this point, he wasn’t sure they’d survive that. No, he was sure of something, that was the worry some part. When he sat on the sofa to pull that tome to him and do anything that didn’t have to do with homework, thank you very much, one of ‘the guys’ was actually there, and judging the way he looked at him he also knew what was going on and why. Obviously they talked about everything and anything that didn’t have to do with a girl; it was some sort of unspoken rule between guys when things like these happened. Sort of in the ‘code’ to ‘not mention it’, and between them they even knew instinctively that the rule of ‘don’t mention it’ was in place. “Did you do that thing for divination?” He asked in feigned boredom, ready to pounce on a potential opportunity to not do it himself. But alas he could almost smell the knowing look and knew his classmate had other plans for him. “Nope, come on, we’ll make something up.” It was obvious he thought it would be a perfect chance now that Severus showed a weakness in the homework department. Which worked for Severus; he wasn’t dragging Lily to finish this homework with him. He wasn’t going to think too much about her either, guys didn’t and wouldn’t do that. They needed to light some candle or other, but that wasn’t really going to happen so they pulled a parchment and since Lily took half his ink bottle as refill for/ damn it! “Well are you going to put something down?” Severus looked up from this parchment and wrote the first thing that came to mind. “Badger, I don’t know, you know the teacher can’t possibly really read these.” He said, giving in to the idea that he wasn’t going to sit this one out. He was going to do the only thing he knew how; plot and scheme. ((a little note on this: Oddly enough I had an actual man revise these ideas and had a long discussion about how the sixteen year old mind worked... The strangest thing was learning that boys and girls were not very different from one another at that age... they pretend to be, though.)) 

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the-absolute-best-gifs:

Only a sick bastard wouldn’t reblog this.

Click to follow this blog, you will be so glad you did!

This. Better make all the tumblr and back.

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hpmaraudersera:

A man realised all the mistakes he had made when he lost the love of his life. And from that night forward, he was a changed man, and risked his life to protect Lily Potter’s young son, Harry. 

30 years, never forget. 

On this night, 30 years ago..

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hpmaraudersera:

A young woman sacrificed herself so her son could live. When Lord Voldemort offered to spare her, Lily Potter stood in front of her boy and bravely protected him, and it cost her her life. She had been selfless in life and death, and even when the lights left her bright green eyes, she was still beautiful. 

30 years, never forget. 

On this night, 30 years ago..

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