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[professorspork]

if i were a woman, i would tweet “ginger snapped so jennifer could body”, but i’m not a woman, and i don’t use twitter, and i haven’t seen jennifer’s body, and i don’t make a lot of money or have a car or look nice

[professorspork]

option 1: tai’s guarding the crown of choice.

pros:

a legitimately important task that recontextualizes his ongoing decision to remain on patch as a personal sacrifice he makes for the greater good.

ozpin would pick the guy named for the god of light to be the gatekeeper of choice, huh.

if any parent in this story is meant to die, it’s him, and narratively this is the most intuitive way to do it.

cons:

realistically, what can tai do to prevent salem / cinder / summer from accessing the vault if they find it? if he’s the gatekeeper, staying on patch alone after everyone else evacuates achieves nothing except, ah, signaling to the enemy that the real vault is under signal academy. bad plan.

it means oz is breaking his promise to be honest and forthcoming, undermining his character growth for the sake of ‘surprising’ the audience with the most obvious answer.

means qrow has either been kept in the dark (see prev point) or he’s also deliberately hiding this information from his nieces after they asked him outright if he knew where tai is; this is so far afield for his character as to border on character assassination, and likewise undermines his positive growth since v7.

honestly makes both yang and ruby seem kind of stupid. they know the crown is hidden somewhere near beacon, that ozpin did something to protect it differently from the others, and that their father hasn’t left patch. ruby was sharp enough to guess that long memory might be a relic hidden in plain sight; yang is just as smart, and she knows tai had “some things” to look after on patch. are we expected to believe that “hey, is dad guarding the relic?” somehow hasn’t occurred to either of them?

tai harbors a whole lot of resentment toward ozpin, and based on qrow kicking him out of ruby’s bedroom to drip-feed her hints on where to go next, he seems to have been on the outer perimeter of the inner circle. why would oz entrust him with the relic’s safety?

glynda—ozpin’s scrupulously loyal second-in-command whose emblem is a crown and whose semblance puts her on par with a maiden—is a far more narratively plausible vault-guardian than tai, and the “sun dragon” makes a damn good red herring.

if he’s guarding the vault, he dies. sorry. but the point of putting the father of 2/4 protagonists in between the two main villains and the thing they want most (choice) is so they can kill him to get it, increasing tension and raising the emotional stakes of negotiating peace. to be clear, rwby is willing to Go There, but i think it’s an unsatisfactory way to close out the rose xiao long family arc.

option 2: survivors trapped under mountain glenn, and tai is taking point.

pros:

a genuinely important, worthwhile thing for him to be doing—even more so than guarding the crown. likely sets up a resolution for him in the vein of “you can be a good huntsman or a good father, and tai picked being a huntsman,” which is an elegant way to balance his contradictions.

gives him meaningful stuff to do in v10; for example, one stealthy huntsman with a bullhead could slip in and out of mountain glenn to get a few dozen people out at a time, and/or run supplies and messages between the kingdoms.

we get to see zwei back in action around mountain glenn :)

introduces a natural segue from playing defense in vacuo to mounting a counteroffensive against beacon as tai’s work clarifies the situation in vale.

easily the most 'heroic' direction for him without contorting the story to arbitrarily lionize tai: he’s a scout preparing the stage for the heroes to take the fight to salem, making him the good counterpart to watts.

cons:

makes no sense to keep it a secret. the emotional beats of B4 can still happen if the girls know this is what tai’s doing: instead of “do you… wonder why he’s not here? i know qrow said he’s on assignment, but what’s more important than here?” yang says “do you… wish he were here? with us? i know qrow said he’s looking for survivors, but how many of them can there really be by now? we need all the help we can get,” and ruby says “maybe we don’t have the full picture” as in maybe dad knows something we don’t and that’s why he hasn’t given up yet. the emotion is the same, and the big "they’re hiding in mountain glenn" reveal is hinted without spoiling.

leaves hanging the narrative thread of what tai has been doing since the fall of beacon, because the “some things” he was dealing with in v4 obviously wasn’t this.

option 3: tai is dead.

pros:

explains the apparent secrecy; qrow knows tai was away “on assignment” (i.e., had taken a huntsman contract that brought him out of the kingdom) at the time salem attacked vale, so he is missing but not yet presumed dead.

might reopen the mystery box of summer’s last mission through the real-deal “left on a mission and never came back” echo.

cons:

raven would know.

it’s a cheap, narratively unsatisfying twist that fails to deliver on the bread crumbs set up in v2-3 (tai starts going on missions again) and v4 (“some things”), and also undermines any serious emotional resolution with regard to yang and ruby’s complex relationships with tai.

option 4: summer’s working with salem, and tai is trying to convince her to come back.

pros:

“some things” being his presumed-dead wife who left him to join the enemy and with whom tai is now having an affair or otherwise hoping to coax back to the heroic side through the power of love whilst also keeping his mouth shut about her being a) still alive and b) a traitor is OBJECTIVELY the funniest answer.

brings forward and interrogates the way tai’s romantic grief informs the choices he makes as a parent: from hiding raven and then refusing to talk about her with yang, to shutting down when he lost summer and letting his five-year-old pick up the pieces, to discovering and then keeping summer’s secrets for the sake of some faint hope that she might finally come back to him.

cogent with the Dead (Absent) Mother / Neglectful Father / Evil Stepmother fairytale paradigm rwby deconstructs with raven, tai, and summer; the father chooses the stepmother over his children.

raises the emotional stakes of the war for summer through direct confrontation with the life she left behind, creating narrative opportunities to develop her character (is she still in love with tai? how does she feel about being his first priority, over their children? does she resent that he has her on this pedestal even now?) and apply pressure to her relationships with salem and cinder (do they know? is summer keeping her communication with him a secret, too? or is he an “asset” she’s using for salem’s benefit?).

consequently, raises the momentum of the narrative toward negotiation with salem; tai still has the coalition’s trust, however strained his personal relationships may be. summer is the obvious ambassador for salem’s side of the war, but she’s also the traitor who needs someone to vouch for her good intentions.

the secrecy needs no explanation: just as summer’s last mission was a summer secret, tai’s "assignment" is a taiyang secret and the girls know everything that oz and qrow do, because all of them have been left in the dark. raven might know, and she has the means to find if she doesn’t, but tai’s whereabouts are entangled with what raven knows about summer, so she can’t explain where tai is or why until she reveals her deep dark secrets about what happened between her and summer that night.

foreshadowing is solid: tai starts to go on "missions" again in v2, after the inner circle becomes aware that salem has infiltrated beacon and just before the breach downtown. when ruby visits summer’s grave in v3, she says "[dad] told me he’s going to be on some mission soon! i think he misses adventuring with you." he’s got to "look after some things" (but he isn’t talking about yang, because he stays home after she leaves). and then with B4 we have ruby echoing what the blacksmith taught her about summer in relation to tai, "maybe we don’t have the full picture?"

juicy

cons:

???

dependent on the unconfirmed theory that summer is working for salem as herself, not some unrecognizable enslaved monster, but i am as confident in that as i was about salem going to vale next and we all know how that turned out :)

taking their mom was not enough salem had to go for the full set APPARENTLY

option 5: secret fifth thing

pros:

???

cons:

???

[professorspork]

I didnt look up what a saint andrews cross is until after reading your fic and I was totally imagining Sun getting crucified while reading. i just accepted that this was probably something people do in sex dungeons

asfkas;fjas/lgkjal incredible

and to be fair it's not... THAT far off...

[professorspork]

im loving the decision to post the new au on sundays bc im now knowingly reading your delicious work at a time where my parents would like me to be at church LOL

very happy to do my part

[professorspork]

Chapters: 1/17 Fandom: RWBY Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long, Blake Belladonna & Sun Wukong, Neptune Vasilias/Sun Wukong Characters: Blake Belladonna, Yang Xiao Long, Sun Wukong (RWBY), Neptune Vasilias Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Semblances (RWBY), Alternate Universe - No Faunus (RWBY), Dom Blake Belladonna, Sub Yang Xiao Long, Dom/sub, Trans Yang Xiao Long, Trans Sun Wukong (RWBY), Trans Female Character, Bisexual Blake Belladonna, Past Blake Belladonna/Adam Taurus, Past Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Recreational Drug Use, Non-Consensual Drug Use, BDSM, Platonic BDSM, Kink Negotiation, Consensual Kink, Bondage, Consensual Sex, Explicit Consent, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Queer Themes, ethical non-monogamy, Open Relationships, Sex Is Fun, Strangers to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Blake Belladonna Needs a Hug, Sex Club, Sex Toys, Happy Ending, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Exhibitionism Summary:

“I’m fine,” Blake insists, the statement instantly belied by the way her teeth chatter as she says it.

Sun rolls his eyes. “Don’t be stupid,” he says, opening the sliding door and rummaging around until he finds a gray zip-up hoodie and tosses it to her. (And… this is the other reason. The reason she needs it, the reason the club keeps luring her back. Because anywhere other than Anesidora? She’s a mess. She’s got no control at all.)

[Or: the sex dungeon AU, an Olympic Rings-shaped polycule in which Yang is in crushes with Blake who queerplatonically doms Sun who is married to Neptune.]

[Or: As a professional librarian and hobbyist dominatrix, Blake values routine, safety, comfort, rules. Why date and risk getting hurt when she can have her needs satisfied without messy strings attached? Enter Yang… a professional mechanic and hobbyist kitten foster who maybe knows a thing or two about repairing things and socializing strays.]

-

CHAPTER 1: THURSDAY

The excitement never truly hits Blake until she gets in the car.

Everything which precedes that moment—making and eating a light dinner; changing her clothes and putting on her makeup; even picking out toys—is calming. Routine. She can pack what she’ll need into her gym bag and carry everything down to the street with a pleasantly detached sort of distance, without falling into daydreams about what any of it means for the rest of her night. It’s all still theoretical. Neatly compartmentalized.

The second she actually slips into the driver’s seat of her old beater of a sedan, though, and the inner pocket of her underwear-style harness brushes just right against her core—the seam and additional fabric deliciously present, even empty of the vibrator it was designed to hold—her blood rushes south, and her head starts to fill with warm static. Here we go. It’s time. Not even the engine taking three sputtering tries to start can ruin her mood; not when she can squeeze her thighs together languidly and picture what’s waiting for her on the other end of this fifteen minute car ride.

It’s Thursday. And while she enjoys every night she manages to get away and spend time at the club, well—

—she particularly enjoys Thursdays. What with her standing date, and all.

KEEP READING

[professorspork]

thinking two characters have had sex does not equal shipping at all… i dont have to like it i just know it happened

[professorspork]

do u have a vibrator in ur pants or is ur penis just so scared

[professorspork]

milf blake au returns with a bang ;)

[professorspork]

Blake's fondly indulgent eye rolls

[professorspork]

OKAY series of polls about sock preferences because i'm a curious autistic fuck:

(if you don't wear socks don't answer any of the other questions)

[professorspork]

Chapters: 1/17 Fandom: RWBY Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long, Blake Belladonna & Sun Wukong, Neptune Vasilias/Sun Wukong Characters: Blake Belladonna, Yang Xiao Long, Sun Wukong (RWBY), Neptune Vasilias Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Semblances (RWBY), Alternate Universe - No Faunus (RWBY), Dom Blake Belladonna, Sub Yang Xiao Long, Dom/sub, Trans Yang Xiao Long, Trans Sun Wukong (RWBY), Trans Female Character, Bisexual Blake Belladonna, Past Blake Belladonna/Adam Taurus, Past Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Recreational Drug Use, Non-Consensual Drug Use, BDSM, Platonic BDSM, Kink Negotiation, Consensual Kink, Bondage, Consensual Sex, Explicit Consent, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Queer Themes, ethical non-monogamy, Open Relationships, Sex Is Fun, Strangers to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Blake Belladonna Needs a Hug, Sex Club, Sex Toys, Happy Ending, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Exhibitionism Summary:

“I’m fine,” Blake insists, the statement instantly belied by the way her teeth chatter as she says it.

Sun rolls his eyes. “Don’t be stupid,” he says, opening the sliding door and rummaging around until he finds a gray zip-up hoodie and tosses it to her. (And… this is the other reason. The reason she needs it, the reason the club keeps luring her back. Because anywhere other than Anesidora? She’s a mess. She’s got no control at all.)

[Or: the sex dungeon AU, an Olympic Rings-shaped polycule in which Yang is in crushes with Blake who queerplatonically doms Sun who is married to Neptune.]

[Or: As a professional librarian and hobbyist dominatrix, Blake values routine, safety, comfort, rules. Why date and risk getting hurt when she can have her needs satisfied without messy strings attached? Enter Yang… a professional mechanic and hobbyist kitten foster who maybe knows a thing or two about repairing things and socializing strays.]

-

CHAPTER 1: THURSDAY

The excitement never truly hits Blake until she gets in the car.

Everything which precedes that moment—making and eating a light dinner; changing her clothes and putting on her makeup; even picking out toys—is calming. Routine. She can pack what she’ll need into her gym bag and carry everything down to the street with a pleasantly detached sort of distance, without falling into daydreams about what any of it means for the rest of her night. It’s all still theoretical. Neatly compartmentalized.

The second she actually slips into the driver’s seat of her old beater of a sedan, though, and the inner pocket of her underwear-style harness brushes just right against her core—the seam and additional fabric deliciously present, even empty of the vibrator it was designed to hold—her blood rushes south, and her head starts to fill with warm static. Here we go. It’s time. Not even the engine taking three sputtering tries to start can ruin her mood; not when she can squeeze her thighs together languidly and picture what’s waiting for her on the other end of this fifteen minute car ride.

It’s Thursday. And while she enjoys every night she manages to get away and spend time at the club, well—

—she particularly enjoys Thursdays. What with her standing date, and all.

KEEP READING

[professorspork]

being an adult is just saying to yourself “this is the weekend i’ll clean my [x]” and then proceeding to not do that because it’s the weekend and you deserve to relax, goddamnit

[professorspork]

its called the D: drive because you look at how much space is left on it and you go "D:"

[professorspork]

Chapters: 1/17 Fandom: RWBY Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long, Blake Belladonna & Sun Wukong, Neptune Vasilias/Sun Wukong Characters: Blake Belladonna, Yang Xiao Long, Sun Wukong (RWBY), Neptune Vasilias Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Semblances (RWBY), Alternate Universe - No Faunus (RWBY), Dom Blake Belladonna, Sub Yang Xiao Long, Dom/sub, Trans Yang Xiao Long, Trans Sun Wukong (RWBY), Trans Female Character, Bisexual Blake Belladonna, Past Blake Belladonna/Adam Taurus, Past Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Recreational Drug Use, Non-Consensual Drug Use, BDSM, Platonic BDSM, Kink Negotiation, Consensual Kink, Bondage, Consensual Sex, Explicit Consent, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Queer Themes, ethical non-monogamy, Open Relationships, Sex Is Fun, Strangers to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Blake Belladonna Needs a Hug, Sex Club, Sex Toys, Happy Ending, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Exhibitionism Summary:

“I’m fine,” Blake insists, the statement instantly belied by the way her teeth chatter as she says it.

Sun rolls his eyes. “Don’t be stupid,” he says, opening the sliding door and rummaging around until he finds a gray zip-up hoodie and tosses it to her. (And… this is the other reason. The reason she needs it, the reason the club keeps luring her back. Because anywhere other than Anesidora? She’s a mess. She’s got no control at all.)

[Or: the sex dungeon AU, an Olympic Rings-shaped polycule in which Yang is in crushes with Blake who queerplatonically doms Sun who is married to Neptune.]

[Or: As a professional librarian and hobbyist dominatrix, Blake values routine, safety, comfort, rules. Why date and risk getting hurt when she can have her needs satisfied without messy strings attached? Enter Yang... a professional mechanic and hobbyist kitten foster who maybe knows a thing or two about repairing things and socializing strays.]

-

CHAPTER 1: THURSDAY

The excitement never truly hits Blake until she gets in the car.

Everything which precedes that moment—making and eating a light dinner; changing her clothes and putting on her makeup; even picking out toys—is calming. Routine. She can pack what she’ll need into her gym bag and carry everything down to the street with a pleasantly detached sort of distance, without falling into daydreams about what any of it means for the rest of her night. It’s all still theoretical. Neatly compartmentalized.

The second she actually slips into the driver’s seat of her old beater of a sedan, though, and the inner pocket of her underwear-style harness brushes just right against her core—the seam and additional fabric deliciously present, even empty of the vibrator it was designed to hold—her blood rushes south, and her head starts to fill with warm static. Here we go. It’s time. Not even the engine taking three sputtering tries to start can ruin her mood; not when she can squeeze her thighs together languidly and picture what’s waiting for her on the other end of this fifteen minute car ride.

It’s Thursday. And while she enjoys every night she manages to get away and spend time at the club, well—

—she particularly enjoys Thursdays. What with her standing date, and all.

KEEP READING

[professorspork]

Hello friends, the first chapter of sdau goes live tomorrow! This time around, instead of playing two truths and a lie we're going to do something a little more straightforward as the teaser. The first is the "thumbnail drop," just like RWBY does-- every weekend the day before the chapter goes live, the title will be revealed.

Tomorrow's chapter is:

Chapter 1: Thursday

We're also gonna keep doing polls, but I think I'll switch up the format every week. This week's poll:

Bonus points for telling me in the chat what you think they'll be up to.

See you tomorrow!

[professorspork]

[professorspork]

My cat sounding like Marge Simpson