professorwolfjunkie-blog

[professorwolfjunkie-blog]

September 25, 2017

Friday was our first day of fall but it sure doesn’t feel like it here in Kansas. This week I need to refocus. I allowed myself to feel the way I felt, but refused to use my tools that keep me stable & sober. I understand it’s okay to feel sad, but that will never be a good enough excuse to skip out on AA. In fact, it’s the perfect reason to show up.

I lost a good friend on Saturday. Her name was Erica & I’d met her in treatment. We had stayed in contact after we departed. She’d relapsed when she got home & ended up going back to the same treatment facility. I was so proud of her for going back. She had posted on Facebook that she would be headed back home to Washington. I was excited to hear about her journey so I had gone to her page to ask her all about it only to find out that she had overdosed. I’d gotten the news pretty early so I had to be the one to tell my fellow recovery friends the gut wrenching news. My heart felt heavy. This was a girl that had held me when I cried. A girl I admired. A beautiful soul inside & out.

There are people that go to rehab & want nothing to do with it. No intentions of changing. The people that were sent by their families in hopes it would cause a spark. When I hear about those people relapsing it comes as no surprise. Erica was positive. She was outgoing, never scared to speak in group. One night her, Stone Lady & I all sat on the curb talking about awareness, energy, 3rd eye. I was fresh into it (still am) & had lots of questions to ask & they understood it without having to explain myself. I felt a special connection with her from that point on. She was always showing me love. She did everything she was supposed to do & then some. I always gave her props for walking laps around the building in the heat of Las Vegas, certainly something I didn’t make much effort to do. I truly believed in her success. She was someone I believed was going to thrive in this life form. A part of me doesn’t want to accept that that opportunity is no longer. She’d told Stone Lady & I about how her grandfather always told her he could see purple around her. Stone Lady explained that she was enlightened & could possibly have the gift to heal others. I remember the chills I got, seeing the hope, the eager curiosity in her eyes. I could feel it was planted inside of her to do such things.

Erica, I will look for you in all things purple. I will honor you with my sobriety & continue to educate others. I will remember you with the fingerprints you’ve left, during the beautiful moments of peace.. surrounded by purple. May your sweet soul Rest In Peace with your God. Until we meet again. I love you.

[professorwolfjunkie-blog]

Very excited to be on this all natural journey! As some of you have already noticed I no longer include shaving as part of my hygiene routine. I've given up on facial cleansers because they make my breakouts worse & dry my skin out. I'll be using extra virgin olive oil & coconut oil as my new regular nightly cleanser. Then mixing up honey, cinnamon & ground nutmeg twice a week for a face mask. (Pray for me!) I've also ordered my Himalayan salt rock as my new alternative for deodorant. I love Old Spice but recently it's been drying my skin out so bad to the point where lotion doesn't soothe it. Plus deodorants have some very harmful chemicals in them that can cause serious health issues. I've also taken part of the no-poo movement! In treatment I was diagnosed with hypothyroid disease & I assumed that had something to do with my hair not feeling as thick as usual along with the fact that I shampoo my hair every single day. My hair has always been long & wavy & I'm all for taking good care of it because my hair is something I take pride in. My hair gets very oily very quickly so it's most likely going to take some time for my hair to adjust to no shampoo. If I decide the no-poo movement isn't for me then I'll have to do some searching for more natural shampoos! I'll keep you guys updated on my journey. Love love.