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[prongsfish]

ideal careers for barty crouch jr besides being a domestic terrorist:

line cook

heretic

slutty eurotrash dj

eccentric, dexterous 1890s safecracker enlisted in a high-stakes heist to steal the queen’s diamonds

the guy that people mean when they say “i know a guy” in mafia movies

STUNT MAN

2000s pop-punk emo band frontman with pictures of his crotch on myspace

manipulative high society victorian-era celebrity hypnotist famous for “causing” somnambulism at his “shows”

electrician (thanks lune)

engineer, but specifically the one behind the infrastructure used in risky motorcycle stunts

slutty eurotrash club promoter

the sound-effects foley guy for b-roll action movies who is always walking around w/ headphones and holding one of those skinny boom mics

house husband

ideal careers for regulus black besides being a failed domestic terrorist:

the sullen, withholding renaissance-era muse of a tortured artist, posing in place of the angels, his enigmatic yet eerily beautiful portrait immortalized forever on the ceiling of a cathedral

critic of any kind (professional hater)

surgeon at a hospital for stuffed animals

a broken man, unfixable. a fool, hated by all, exploited till death. only in this way will he be redeemed

cunty benedictine monk

[prongsfish]

hEY HEY

question of the day for my fish!!!

would you rather turn into the jersey devil

OR

become a siren?

what the fuck is the jersey devil. i have never heard of that in my life and i looked it up but was just left with more questions. i’ll stick with siren i think. that thing is a freak

[prongsfish]

sunday snippet

thank you for the tags @fromagony @ninety-two-bees @sixlane <33 your snippets were all incredible

here's a little bartylily which once again may or may not leave my drafts

Lily was sprawled out beside him, heads close together but bodies angled away. Barty wondered that if someone were to look down on them if they’d look like one strange creature. Lily held up her hand to the sky, fingers spread like she was trying to catch the starlight. “Sometimes I wish I could just stop time and catch my breath for a moment. All the time actually," Lily said to the night sky. “I'm tired of being perceived.” Barty let the words settle between them for a moment. In the end, his curiosity won out. “Even right now?” he asked. Lily dropped her hand next to his so that their pinkies brushed. “No. Not right now.”

np tags: @ecstarry @starchaserwrites @soreddieforit @bellaxisworld @theicarusconstellation @regscupid @siriusblackfamilytrauma @prongsfish and anyone else who wants to share

[prongsfish]

who are these guys

[prongsfish]

The lyrics in Slipknot's "Custer": "CUT/CUT/CUT ME UP AND FUCK/FUCK/FUCK ME UP", describe exactly what happens in Evan and Barty's bedroom

those and the first few opening lines of disasterpiece too... poor evan is not beating the necrophiliac allegations

[prongsfish]

tsn is my favourite movie in the world but maybe i'm just a hater i do not want a sequel 😭😭 just saw people getting excited for it but i was horrified when i first heard about the idea. tsn wasn't good because it was about facebook, but because it was about the interpersonal relationships behind facebook. there cannot be a sequel about that because they're real people. aaron sorkin said he wants to make it because he thinks social media was responsible for the jan 6 riots and yeah i don't disagree with that but. make a different movie. i cannot imagine a way to make a real sequel of tsn. you can't just make a movie about facebook and call it a sequel?? idkkkk lol!

[prongsfish]

huge fan of reading and learning, but also an even bigger fan of sleeping and being unconscious.

[prongsfish]

Sometimes I see a respected mutual in my notes and remember they follow me and I'm like. Should I apologize for what I'm doing here. But they did choose to be in my house

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I DIDNT ASK A QUESTION TODAY UGH

im losing my touch tsk tsk

the fates give you a choice, you must pick:

tragic hero

or

unsatisfied villain

CLICHE I KNOW BUT I GENUINELY THINK ABOUT THIS DAILY AND I MUST KNOW!!!

HAHAHAHA OOOHHHH UHHH

it's easy to say unsatisfied villain bc villains can be soo interesting but honestly tragic hero... ughhh it can be so good. and hero can mean so many things... they wanted to be good but in whatever way the world won't let them and fuck :( that gets me :((

[prongsfish]

just watched a fincher movie and my life wasn't dramatically and irrevocably changed. don't hmu :/

[prongsfish]

how did you decide what you wanted to do with your hair???

I'm too indecisive for that shit

a loooot of thinking about it lmao. though i also do go with by the motto of "it'll grow back!" so...

usually i just wait until i can't stand what it looks like anymore HAHA. i definitely ride trends and i'm not ashamed of it, i steal haircuts from guys on tiktok i'm attracted to and it's just a whole lot of fun. i'm also somewhat involved in my local alternative scene and i like that no matter what i'm wearing, i am visibly queer and/or alt. solidarity! <3

i think my biggest advice is to just have fun with it and don't worry too much. sure, i've had some atrocious hair cuts before, but they grew back eventually. if anything, ask friends for their advice, god knows i do all the time lmao. just have some fun with it!!

[prongsfish]

been thinking abt demon james a lot

[prongsfish]

You said you were gonna grow up,

then you were gonna come find me.

[prongsfish]

i dont care what yall say barty is either a thief, a murderer, a money launderer, HE’S A FELON OK or he’s a fucking electrician. hell, he’s probably both. never paid for a tool or working material in his Life yet he has all the best stuff. barty probably steals shit from all electrician companies his manic sewer rat fingers can manage to google and them Sells that across the border to another country, in exchange getting their cheaper material and making a cut off that for himself, THEN installs everything in his clients’ homes and demands double the price. he’s so smart barty didnt even have to learn the fucking job, he leafed through a book once and that’s that. the amount of times he’s been shocked is Concerning and he probably has burn scars all over his body from him. his eyes have lost color over the few years he’s been doing it and the thing with his tongue is a tick result of biting at a cable he perfectly well Knew the electricity wasnt shut off on

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James yelled at his dogs

"stop chewing plastic, you fucking twat"

what an icon

LMAO that's so real honestly. i love the word twat

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every post i ever make should devolve into homosexuality and the eroticism surrounding catholic priests, thanks you two <3

finally got the mullet i’ve been wanting… i have become barty crouch jr. this is my final form

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MULLET GANGG!!!!!!! i've had a pseudo mullet grown out mod cut thing for a while now but i've been too pussy to go short on the sides until now... so glad i finally did

finally got the mullet i’ve been wanting… i have become barty crouch jr. this is my final form