psychedaleka

[psychedaleka]

i have a youtube video about the use of jumpscares in horror games playing in the background while I work, and it reminded me of the single worst jumpscare i've ever experienced, which happened while I was playing a little game I like to call... Google Maps. (you play Google Maps by turning on street view, zooming in to somewhere that looks interesting, and clicking on any 360 photo views that people might have uploaded. i have spent many hours of my life playing Google Maps)

Anyway, spin this guy around to see something that legitimately made me jump so hard that I damn near threw my drink across the room

(more info under the cut if you're worried about what you'll see)

there's a fish very close to the camera

[psychedaleka]

fake relationship but its a king and his concubine that was once an amazing soldier but he couldn’t go up the ranks for whatever reason so the king was like listen. hear me out. you can be my strategy dude. u just gotta be okay w walking around shirtless a lot. and soldier dude is like man that’s an UPSIDE and yknow they end up falling in love

[psychedaleka]

My lord I need you to make up your mind, where the fuck are we going

[psychedaleka]

someone on twitter is trying to claim that use of an em-dash is an indication of AI-generated writing because it’s “relatively rare” for actual humans to use it. skill issue

[psychedaleka]

Count reprints, later editions of the same book, etc. If you have a copy that includes multiple books in one volume, you can count that, but do not count sequels/etc on their own. You can count ebooks and audiobooks if you possess the files in a permanent way (borrowed and streamed don't count).

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We ask your questions anonymously so you don’t have to! Submissions are open on the 1st and 15th of the month.

[psychedaleka]

Comedy series about an evil wizard where in every episode they discover some Ancient Secret of Magic that will allow them to surpass their rivals and bring the world to its knees, and every episode they learn the hard way why modern wizards don't do it that way anymore.

[psychedaleka]

ever engage with a media you really really liked and thought you were going to become obsessed with but it doesn’t quite lodge itself into your brain at the correct angle and you can just brush fingertips with the version of yourself from the alternate reality where it completely corrupted your every waking thought

[psychedaleka]

There's a labyrinth. In the middle of it, a minotaur is making waffles.

[psychedaleka]

[psychedaleka]

Original post

Poem @chucktaylorupset

[psychedaleka]

"came back wrong" but it's from work

[psychedaleka]

Fuck personality tests. Who comes to your mind when I say “Michael”

[psychedaleka]

i went to "mad at me" island expecting to find people i knew, something i understood. but when my boat landed, standing upon the shore were a million empty husks wearing my own face. every foot of the island was occupied, and everywhere i went, they watched me with contempt. they never spoke, never breathed. they simply watched. no matter how i grovelled and begged, snarled and cursed, tried to hide or kicked and hit, they simply stared. the hatred in their gaze was inescapable, but i could hardly return it, knowing that their doomed existence was of my own creation. knowing that the hatred was nobody's but my own. in the end i just wept, unable to stand the relentless gaze of my own infinite glare.

the guy who i accidentally cut off in traffic last week was there also

[psychedaleka]

Throwback to Yesterday

I was tagged by the wonderful @prackspoor to hit the rewind button and share something from the past. Rather than subject you all to angsty pre-teen Percy Jackson fanfiction, I figured I'd share a blast from the past for Sauron as well.

Rewind - by psychedaleka

---

Mairon holds the mote in his hand, in its self consuming turmoil of anger and hate and fear and malice.

“This is what we become.”

Dead silence.

“Was it worth it?” Mairon asks. “Yes, we’ve achieved so much, we’ve reached heights never before imaginable but we’ve fallen, harder and faster and further than any before us.

“This is what we’ve become.

“Was it worth it?

"Was this what you wanted?

“Are you happy?”

"I had no choice—" Sauron, this time.

"No," Gorthaur says. "We chose. Don't you dare diminish that."

---

Tagging (only if you want to do it!) @lemurious @crackinthecup @eveningalchemist and anyone else who wants to participate!

[psychedaleka]

Throwback to Yesterday

Tagged by @annarobots to share something from the days of yore. In my case, "yore" would be the year 2016, which was just after (checks notes) I began publishing fic on AO3.

In the spirit of the challenge, I decided to share one of my first forays into the Silm fandom, back when I didn't yet know my Finwës from each other. Perhaps interestingly, these first forays (which were not published) were not about two certain Ringsmiths. I think it is a little known fact that the thing that brought me to the fandom was not in fact, the Second Age. Instead, the culprits were Years Before The Years. Oh, and two certain dark lords.

In this vein... (hits rewind):

...................................................................

The feast that followed was opulent. Fruit and vegetables of all kinds, dipped in fine spices, cooked and diced, nectar of flowers and honeycombs with cinnamon.

Mairon didn’t touch any of it. Aulë kept to his side for some part of the evening, but when he went to talk to his brethren and sisters that were mingling in Varda's airy high halls, Mairon was left alone at the long table.

He poured himself some wine and watched it swiveling in its silvery goblet. Even the crockery was ice cold, here in this frigid mansion at the top of Oiolossë. He shuddered and retreated to a quieter, lonelier corner of the hall where a cushioned marble bench was sequestered away. There he sat, staring at the mosaic beneath his too-narrow boots while the cold of the wall seeped through his thin tunic.

“Do you enjoy your day of honour so little?”

Mairon lifted his head, but he could see no one near him and no one had passed by him in the meantime. The other corners of the hall suddenly seemed far removed; the hustle and bustle of voices dimmed, the smell of the food had evaporated and the music was coming from far away, as if it had to cross a mountain range before reaching his ears.

“If you want to talk, come out where I can see you,” he replied, his tone just an edge away from menacing.

He looked everywhere, but although his eyes were sharp, he could see no one. He regarded the shadows in the corner to his right where a little plant stood in a vase. The shadows seemed off. Were they falling in the wrong direction or were they too dark? He was unable to say for sure. Frowning, he turned his head and flinched when he suddenly perceived someone out of the corner of his left eye.

A tall dark figure stood next to him and darkness gathered around his shoulders and ankles like black mist and raven’s feathers. The figure was tall, taller than Varda, taller than Aulë even—they might have been of a height with Manwë, the Eagle King.

Mairon frowned. The Eagle King?

He looked the figure up and down, clad in darkness and black feathers, a none-too-subtle mockery of the Lord of Arda. There was no one in Arda Mairon knew who would dare to ridicule the king so obviously. Safe for—

He wanted to jump to his feet and walk away, but found he couldn’t. His boots were frozen to the floor and his tongue was tied.

“It is impolite to walk away from someone who just greeted you,” the dark twin of Manwë said. “They call you Mairon, do they not?”

Mairon gripped the edge of the bench and at last his tongue sprang free. “Who are you?”

The dark figure stood before the bench and looked down at him. Mist and the backlight of the feast hid his features from view. “You would not have tried to run if you did not already know.”

..............................................................................

Oh man, that sure felt like pulling out ancient records from dusty shelves. I liked it!

@cycas, @potatoobsessed999, @naamah-beherit, @radiantanor, @psychedaleka, @thearrogantemu, do you want to give this a go?

[psychedaleka]

the locked tomb is a comedy

[psychedaleka]

Drunk fremen walking back from the bar in a straight line