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                          YOU’RE SOFT, SOFT LIKE SPRING FLOWERS AND                           SUNSETS AND THE WHITE FEATHERS INSIDE YOUR                            PILLOW. 

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sentence meme ft. shit from my group chat

‘ well i mean KILL HER WITH DICK. ’

‘ mhm got me seven shades of shook. ’

‘ i wanna throat punch ______ so fucking hard his damn adams apple forms a third nut and then i’ll proceed to cut them all off and make him the bitch he truly is. ’

‘ well it’s a journal entry…  about gonorrhea. ’

‘ fuck me up swamp daddy. ’

‘ I’M GONNA PUT MA DICK IN THE OWL. ’

‘ 50 shades of mehoy nehoy. ’

‘ _____ is about to be Super Extra right now. ’

‘ it just means you have a golden vagina,  be proud. ’

‘ wiener dogs weird me out sometimes.  too wiener-y. ’

‘ i wanna see _____ get his lil bitch ass eaten by great doggos. ’

‘ YOU FUCKED UP SO BAD. ’

‘ WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR POTATO DAD. ’

‘ it’s not ogre…  it’s never ogre…. ’

‘ just oompa loompas filled with rage. ’

‘ pop your pussy for satan. ’

‘ no i’m dead inside let’s brutally murder them. ’

‘ got what i came for,  yeet bitches. ’

‘ ______  CAN EAT MY ENTIRE DICK. ’

‘ — vampire stds. ’

‘ MEHOY NEHOY. ’

‘ suck his dick and gain all knowledge. ’

‘ my brother is a loser that plays with minecraft swords and is a furry. ’

‘ yeah here,  remember shrek is love shrek is life. ’

‘ nipple man. ’

‘ dong-brush.  cock-cushion. ’

‘ wow look at me being a fucking failure. ’

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iconic vines sentence meme .

​❛ suck a motherfucking dick . ❜

​❛ i thought you were bae , turns out you were just fam . ❜

​❛ i thought you were american . ❜

​❛ is that a weed !? ❜

​❛ i won’t hesitate bitch ! ❜

​❛ chipotle is my life . ❜

​❛ turn off the flash you fucking moron ! ❜

​❛ kiss my ass bitch motherfucker ! ❜

​❛ is that a police !? ❜

​❛ i’m calling the weed ! ❜

​❛ done & done , let me pull the table out of my ass . ❜

​❛ merry crisis ! ❜

​❛ i don’t have enough money for chicken nugget . ❜

​❛ i’m ready to die anytime , any place , for any reason . ❜

​❛ hey guys , we’re unboxing this cheese stick today . ❜

​❛ i aint never gonna stop loving you , bitch .  ❜

​❛ this is the comedy police ! that joke’s too funny ! ❜

​❛ i’m not going back to jail ! ❜

​❛ what the fuck ? $599 for a fucking playground ? that looks like a piece of shit . ❜

​❛ FUCK YOUR TEA ! ❜

​❛ the feminists are taking over ! ❜

​❛ I GOT TWO FREE TACOS ! ❜

​❛ and they were roommates ! ❜

​❛ i’m not your friend ! ❜

​❛ there’s no saving this sweet piece of ass . ❜

​❛ hi welcome to chili’s ! ❜

​❛ yeah tip of the penis to you too . ❜

​❛ this is why mom doesn’t FUCKING love you ! ❜

​❛ welcome to bible study , we’re all children of jesus . ❜

​❛ aw fuck , i can’t believe you’ve done this . ❜

​❛ YO HOLY SHIT HE DEAD ! ❜

​❛ this is the dollar store , how good can it be ? ❜

​❛ step back , i think i’m gonna vomit ! ❜

​❛ oh sorry , i didn’t see ya there , i was too busy blocking out the haters . ❜

​❛ shut up ! your mother buys you mega blocks instead of legos ! ❜

​❛ I’LL TAKE A NAP HERE ! ❜

​❛ i hate to do this but i specifically asked for no mustard and you just brought me a bottle of mustard on a plate . ❜

​❛ how are we gonna win if we fucking die ? ❜

​❛ why the fuck would i say printer ? ❜

​❛ the benefits of killing him would be that i’d be pushed way less . ❜

​❛ but it pays off, because i dont even have time to think about dying . ❜

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✰   —  —  —  BUZZFEED UNSOLVED SENTENCE STARTERS

‘  strap in ‘cause this one is rough.  ’ ‘  it’s– it’s yucky.  ’ ‘  i’m aware of some details of this and it’s– it’s yucky.  ’ ‘  i’m not a gambling man, but i don’t really like those odds.  ’ ‘  we could conceivably run into this guy taking a dump in the woods or something.  ’ ‘  are you fucking out of your mind?  ’ ‘  i’m starting to think you want to die.  ’ ‘  you turned a corner on that one pretty quick.  ’ ‘  oh my god, it’s fucking horrifying.  ’ ‘  there’s an elk, though. there’s a deer over there.  ’ ‘  here’s the remains and rubble of one of the greatest unsolved mysteries of all time and you’re looking at the fucking deer in the forrest.  ’ ‘  maybe they were in there telling ghost stories.  ’ ‘  that’s not what pillow talk is, i don’t think.  ’ ‘  pillow talk could either mean something you do after sex or it could mean what’s like sleepover talk.  ’ ‘  do you tell ghost stories after sex?  ’ ‘  all very effective for– for murder.  ’ ‘  they stabbed him so hard that the knife bent.  ’ ‘  you would think that there’d be at least one witness.  ’ ‘  you see someone running through the forrest covered in blood, you’re probably not gonna bat an eye.  ’ ‘  that’s not how the forrest works.  ’ ‘  excuse me, sir. why are you covered in blood?  ’ ‘  i’m glad to know that you would be the worst crime scene witness of all time.  ’ ‘  oh, you were phrasing it in a dramatic way.  ’ ‘  what is it about killers– that they want to be caught so badly… or like they want to get as close to being caught without being caught?  ’ ‘  i can’t put my mind into the mind of a criminal.  ’ ‘  i can put my mind into the mind of a criminal.  ’ ‘  some of them must be friends, others would like to plunge knives into each other.  ’ ‘  i can imagine one friend of yours murdering you.  ’ ‘  i’m pretty sure there was a coverup by the police department.  ’ ‘  70′s and 80′s police were always just like, ‘oh, you murdered someone? you got forty bucks?’  ’ ‘  great! what else do you want?! i murdered people for you! and now… what?  ’ ‘  oh, so i’m the psycho cause i murdered for you!?  ’ ‘  what, the police were just writing fan fiction?  ’ ‘  this is just baffling to me.  ’ ‘  i guess that’s their job, but can you imagine how much goddamn paperwork is involved in that? so much!  ’ ‘  i’m pretty sure we’re being watched, so i kind of wanna leave, to be honest.  ’ ‘  i’ve had enough of this place and i haven’t even been here that long. i hate this place.  ’ ‘  this boogeyman is very thorough.  ’ ‘  i guess we’re lucky he got lazy.  ’ ‘  the greatest safety precautions of our time are written in blood.  ’ ‘  i think they’re tired of this ongoing saga that never ends.  ’ ‘  you know, i actually disagree with that last sentiment.  ’ ‘  this is like straight-up end of days shit going on.  ’ ‘  this could’ve been the beginning of the zombie apocalypse, in my mind.  ’ ‘  i’ve daydreamed about having an amazing bunker that has satellite tv.   ’ ‘  ‘bad advil’ sounds like a shitty indie band.  ’ ‘  the wild west was the 80′s.  ’ ‘  in the 80′s you could walk in a store, pocket a soda, punch a guy in the face, and then be like ‘see ya later. fuck you!’ cops wouldn’t get to your door for weeks.  ’ ‘  he had books that were just titled ‘how to crime’? if he had a book called ‘how to crime’ then there’s your guy.  ’ ‘  oh, yeah… nah, i’m good. eh, bit of a reach.  ’ ‘  some old lady in florida bought the unabomber’s typewriter?  ’ ‘  maybe this guy was really in the dog house and was just desperate for any kind of turn of affection from her so he thought, ‘i know that i’ll do! i’ll write the fbi!’  ’ ‘  no, i didn’t– what, is there anything to suggest that i would chase my mom with an axe?  ’ ‘  i think you wear a mask sometimes.  ’ ‘  maybe you should keep digging and see what happens.  ’ ‘  these are two messed up weirdos who have found each other and it’s almost a shockingly beautiful love story.  ’ ‘  i don’t get it. i just wanna talk about my work and everyone just keeps seeming to bring up all my past of all the shitty stuff i’ve done.  ’ ‘  ugh, this guy’s gross.  ’ ‘  it must’ve been fun to be a criminal in the 80′s.  ’ ‘  everything before the 80′s – just lawless.  ’ ‘  get your sunglasses ready because this one is packed full of bright stars.  ’ ‘  i’m good to go. i’m always ready, baby!  ’ ‘  it came true so she was actually warranted in all these fears.  ’ ‘  this would be like if you were eaten by a shark.  ’ ‘  i thought for a second we were talking about things that are actually scary.  ’ ‘  i’m gonna let this slide because i know you’re just trying to get a rise out of me.  ’ ‘  does that man have a magical penis or something?  ’ ‘  you think the only reason someone would go back to someone is because they have a magical penis?  ’ ‘  i feel like divorce is probably a lot of work.  ’ ‘  do you not know how love works?  ’ ‘  maybe i don’t know how love works.  ’ ‘  i have a hard time imagining someone going gaga over christopher walken.  ’ ‘  i bet when you get in a room with christopher walken, he commands the space.  ’ ‘  i brought some cocktail weenies.  ’ ‘  one of my greatest fears is that someone will trick me into doing heroin.  ’ ‘  that’s the dumbest fear i’ve ever heard in my life.  ’ ‘  how many situations can you be in that would put you up to that potential danger?  ’ ‘  how many parties are you going to where heroin’s involved? it seems like a lot.  ’ ‘  it’s the fear that someone would come up to me on the street and put heroin in me and then i’m hooked forever.  ’ ‘  here’s what must’ve happened… these forty things, in succession.  ’ ‘  what are you trying to do, fuck my wife?  ’ ‘  why would he make this up?  ’ ‘  he– he was just trying to fuck someones wife.  ’ ‘  i can’t imagine murdering someone even when drunk.  ’ ‘  when you drink you can imagine murdering someone?!  ’ ‘  i ate a pumpkin once when i was drunk… i just took a bite out of a pumpkin.  ’ ‘  that’s a rational fear!  ’ ‘  that is not a rational fear!  ’ ‘  these are the musings of a paranoid man.  ’

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                          YOU’RE SOFT, SOFT LIKE SPRING FLOWERS AND                           SUNSETS AND THE WHITE FEATHERS INSIDE YOUR                            PILLOW. 

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NOELA GARNER    ——    MOODBOARD.

@puresttangel !    *don’t reblog unless tagged!

[puresttangel-blog]

                          YOU’RE SOFT, SOFT LIKE SPRING FLOWERS AND                           SUNSETS AND THE WHITE FEATHERS INSIDE YOUR                            PILLOW. 

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“ ever kiss in the rain? ” ( ADAM )

           SHE  HASN’T,   but  he  should  know  that.     he  should  also  know  that  noela  has  always  found  kissing  in  the  rain  to  be  the  CUTEST  THING  she  has  ever  seen  in  the  movies  she  has  watched   (   there’s  no  telling  how  many  times  she  SQUEALED  over  those  scenes   ).    THE  RAIN  FALLS  AROUND  THEM  and  she  can  slowly  start  to  feel  the  butterflies  in  her  stomach,  her  heart  faintly  beginning  to  race  as  she  looks  up  at  adam.     ❛   no,  i  haven’t.   but  i  have  always  found  it  to  be  REALLY  ROMANTIC.  ❜     if  she  was  going  to  play  out  one  of  her  dreams  –  SHE’S  HAPPY  IT’S  WITH  HIM.

                                                       ——–——-  MEME  //  ACCEPTING.

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kissy sentence starters.

“ is it bad i really want to kiss you right now? ” “ do me a favor, kiss my ass. ” “ they can all just kiss my ass. ” “ i kissed someone today. ” “ i kissed a girl/boy and i liked it. ” “ kissing burns calories you know. ” “ my lips really want to meet yours. ” “ so are we going to kiss or not? ” “ i sent you a bunch of kiss emojis. ” “ don’t talk, just kiss me. ” “ i really enjoyed our kiss last night. ” “ you make me want to kiss you. ” “ you owe me a kiss. ” “ pucker up. ” “ read my lips, no. ” “ your eyes say no but your lips say yes. ” “ i just want to kiss you. ” “ i miss your lips. ” “ give me a kiss. ” “ blow a kiss my way for good luck. ” “ ever kiss in the rain? ” “ ever kiss under water? ” “ it was just a kiss, that’s all. ” “ a kiss doesn’t mean anything. ” “ i love when our lips meet. ” “ where do you want me to kiss you? ” “ i want to either kiss you or kill you right now. ” “ did you really just kiss him/her? ” “ friends aren’t allowed to kiss one another. ” “ kiss me one more time. ” “ want to make out? ” “ you’re a terrible kisser. ” “ teach me how to kiss? ” “ i remember our first kiss. ” “ your lips are calling my name. ” “ let’s just kiss already. ”

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            SHE’S  SLOW  TO  APPROACH  HIM,   eyes  closely  examining  this  rather..  LARGE  MAN  in  front  of  her.    noela  still  isn’t  quite  sure  how  she  feels  about  demetri,   though  if  his  presence  is  making  heidi  happy,   then  surely  she  should  have  no  reason  to  DISTRUST  HIM.      ❛   demetri...  ❜    her  voice  falls  quiet,   her  small  hands  fumbling  gently  with  what  she  holds.   in  true  NOELA  STYLE,   she  has  made  him  a  flower  crown..  her  version  of  welcoming  him  into  their  home.    oh,  she  HOPES  HE  LIKES  IT.     ❛   i  ---   i  made  this  for  you..   well,  mary  helped  me  gather  the  flowers  to  make  it..  we  hope  you  like  it. ❜ 

                         -------  @storybookishh   didn’t  ask  for  this  either  but  you’re  getting  it.

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             NOELA’S  RELATIONSHIP  WITH  HILDA  AND  MARY;    as  a  human,  noela’s  own  mother  was  very  cold  and  distant  with  her  daughter.    she  wasn’t  MISTREATED,   at  least  not  to  the  degree  of  her  new  family,   but  she  lacked  the  connection  to  her  mother  that  she  desperately  wished  she  had.      her  father  was  the  complete  opposite  though,  always  showering  noela  with  love  and  affection  and  bringing  her  little  gifts  every  now  and  again  to  BRIGHTEN  HER  DAY   (  truthfully  she  takes  after  her  father  the  most  ).     it  wasn’t   until  HILDA  FOUND  HER  on  the  streets,  begging  for  food  and  shivering  quite  terribly  from  the  cold,   that  noela  got  what  she  wished  for.   it  didn’t  take  long  for  noela  to  latch  on  to  hilda,   and  the  two  have  developed  a  very  close  bond  with  one  another  --  NOELA  AND  MARY,  given  their  very  childlike  behavior  and  pure  souls,  are  the  most  like  hilda’s  legitimate  adopted  children  than  the  rest  of  the  girls  in  the  coven.  

                  MARY  IS  NOELA’S  VERY  BEST  FRIEND  AND  SISTER.    the  two  girls  are  almost  inseparable,  it  isn’t  likely  that  you  will  find  one  without  the  other.    again,  like  hilda,  noela  was  quick  to  latch  on  to  mary  given  their  VERY  SIMILAR  personalities  and  interests.   often  times  you  will  find  them  hidden  away  in  the  forest  somewhere  searching  for  the  perfect  FIELD  OF  FLOWERS  or  pretty  stones  to  make  gifts  for  their  family,  and  it  is  likely  that  you  won’t  see  them  for  HOURS  UPON  HOURS  until  they  return  with  a  million  different  flower  crowns.    ----   MARY  AND  HILDA   are  the  two  most  important  people  in  noela’s  life   (   don’t  get  me  wrong,  she  adores  everyone  in  her  family  but  she’s  the  closest  to  mary  and  hilda  )   and  she  would  do  ABSOLUTELY  ANYTHING  for  them.

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              HUNTING  AND  KILLING  HUMANS  has  never  been  something  that  noela  enjoys  doing.   even  though  hilda’s  coven  tends  to  target  THE  SCUM  of  the  earth,  it  has  never  made  noela  feel  any  better  about  taking  someone’s  life.   it  just  isn’t  in  her  nature,  and  it  brings  her  a  great  deal  of  pain   --  ESPECIALLY  when  she  was  first  brought  into  the  coven.    had  she  survived  longer  than  a  year  before  the  VOLTURI  INCIDENT  took  place;   it  is  a  HIGH  POSSIBILITY  that  noela  would  have  switched  to  feeding  on  animals  instead.

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BREE:

       it makes her flinch,    the door smacking against the wall so suddenly,    but she’s quick to  relax  once she sees who it is.    of all the girls,    it’s certainly noela    (    and by extension,    mary    )    who makes bree the most  comfortable.    it’s unexpected,    their personalities being so..    much  for someone like bree,    but they’re quite simple beings.    no possibility of ulterior motives in girls who once spent nearly  two days straight  on the search for a perfect flower bouquet for their ‘mother’.    “oh,    uh.    sure.”    she tucks her book off to the side and stands to follow the girl,    brows raised.    “this isn’t another rock for your collection,    is it?”

           a  giggle  falls  from  the  girl’s  lips,  head  shaking  at  the  question  she’s  asked.     ❛   oh  no,   NOT  THIS  TIME!!  i  promise  it’s  something  much  better!!  ❜      there’s  a  HIGH  POSSIBILITY  that  bree  won’t  be  as  excited  about  it  as  noela  and  mary,   but  maybe  she’ll  find  some  enjoyment  from  their  reactions.    the  tiny  female  continues  for  a  while  until  they  have  both  reached  a  small  clearing  in  the  middle of  the  forest  surrounding  their  home,   and  a  BRIGHT  SMILE  appears  across  her  face  when  she  looks  upon  the...  surprise.   it’s  a  small  baby  deer  left  in  the  care  of  noela’s  dear  sister  mary,   and  for  some  ODD  REASON  it  doesn’t  seem  to  fear  either  of  them   (  perhaps  it  can  sense  that  the  girls  are  GENTLE  CREATURES  --   as  much  as  a  vampire  could  be,  at  least  ).       ❛   do  you  think  hilda  will  let  us  KEEP  HIM??  ❜

[puresttangel-blog]

                          YOU’RE SOFT, SOFT LIKE SPRING FLOWERS AND                           SUNSETS AND THE WHITE FEATHERS INSIDE YOUR                            PILLOW.