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might relapse sh tonight <33
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i hope what you’ve done to me fucking haunts you for the rest of your life.
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you treat me like actual shit and i still want to worship you. i fucking hate you and what you do to me. how you treat me.
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i want to be angry and destructive and say horrible fucking things but i cant.
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want to kill him want to kill him want to kill him
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really wanting to slice into my thighs rn idk :/
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oh my god. oh my god. i need to lose weight if i don’t i’m going to die
#not to be ed :3 but holy fucking shit#i gained like 50 pounds in 3 months somehow and this is the heaviest i’ve literally ever been#and i think it’s bc of my meds but JESUS#it makes me feel SICK#i hate the way i look#tempted to reignite my old ed to lose weight but ughhhhh#i was so snatchable when i was like 110….#pvppygutz#pvppy speaks
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i can’t do anything without thinking of you
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i hope you think i’m dead. i hope it haunts you. i hope you think it’s your fault :3
#hehe i don’t care what anyone else thinks#fuck you i hope i haunt you forever the way you haunt me#pvppy speaks#pvppygutz#actually bpd#actually mentally ill
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think i’ve built a tolerance to alcohol which sucks bc now it’s all just gonna be more expensive :/
#i guess drinking everyday will do that to you but like#come on#i just want to not feel everything i’m feeling so intensely if at all#i already have a major one for weed#and it’s either alcohol and weed or hard drugs#and i want to stay away from hard drugs if i can help it i guess#pvppy speaks#pvppygutz
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i love eating pills like candy :3
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microdosing killing myself by bleeding out in my room every night until i fall asleep
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knowing they’re together today makes me want to kill myself more than usual
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thinkin bout cvtting some hearts into my thigh for valentines day idk
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