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Twinkling Watermelon Headcanons for the Soul

This is my very self-indulgent offering to the deprived Yichan/Cheongah yearners, because two years is long enough to finally get me to write, not a full-length piece, but something.

Aftermath

After the confession/performance, Yichan didn't want to be away from Cheongah. Instead, he gave Eungyeol a leave-before-she-sees-you look (which, Eungyeol gave an "okay" sign to before dashing out of the band room) and basked in the feeling of being in Cheongah's hold.

His heart was attempting to break out of his rib cage, but he tried to play it cool. When Cheongah finally leaves the hug—much to his dismay—he saw her face for the first time again and.. oh. Oh, she's smiling. His knees? Weak.

He did not get to finish the song anymore, but he somehow managed to sign: I'll walk you home.

The journey home was awkward, but sweet. Two teenagers, happy and in love, walking or sitting side-by-side, unsure of what to say. Yichan couldn't really stand the silence, so he asked her about the camping trip. She said yes.

Oh, and they kept insisting on watching each other either to go inside the house (Yichan) or go on their way home (Cheongah). They agreed to partways at the same time.

But Yichan didn't. He stayed to watch Cheongah get inside her home before skipping or tornado-ing his way back to his grandmother's place.

Holding Hands

Yichan is big on physical touch. When he's proud of his bandmates, he gives them a pat on the back. When Eungyeol cries, he hugs him like a father. When Sekyeong (Eunyu) successfully "rage-baits" Eungyeol, he gives her a hi-five.

With Cheongah, however, it's a little different, because apparently, it was easier to hold Cheongah's hand when he didn't have all these big, overwhelming feelings for her.

One time, Cheongah guided his hands to correct a particular sign, then he froze. His hands started tingling. His ears turned red, and he struggled to form words both verbally and physically. Cheongah was oblivious to all of this, and found Yichan's stuttering funny. Seeing Cheongah laugh was the last thing he needed to see when his heart was beating like a drum that time, yet he wouldn't trade it for the world.

So, Yichan just.. doubletakes before initiating contact. Cheongah is the opposite. She doesn't hesitate at all. She fixes his hair, holds his arm, and hugs him when the moment begs it.

To be fair, hand-holding is not really their thing! Before touch, their hands are primarily used for communication. So, Yichan once experienced trying to reach for Cheongah's hand only to miss, because Cheongah had to tell him about a certain artwork she's been working on.

Still, Yichan likes to play with her fingers when they're in the band room, and Cheongah's too busy observing the sit-com tendencies of Yichan's bandmates.

Who Asked Who?

Also after the confession/performance, Yichan broke down on his knees when he realized that he did not ask Cheongah to be his girlfriend. Now, he's overthinking if he missed the chance or not, because his boarder hyungs teased him that "she would've brought it up" if she wanted him to be her boyfriend. (They're all single college boys paying Eungyeol to do their homework—I don't know why Yichan fell for it.)

Yichan knew that Cheongah likes him, but she literally just told him to fuck off a few days ago. What can a young foolish adolescent boy do but be scared?

The suffering ended immediately though, because the day after, Yichan saw Cheongah walking out her campus gates, smiling. He asked her if Eungyeol was around with her chauffeur, and she said: "I told Eungyeol that I wanted to see my boyfriend first."

Yichan went silent. Then he proceeded to fall to the ground.

Yichan remains.. Yichan

Yichan is a balance of being extremely uncritically fond of Cheongah, and being Cheongah's biggest tease. Despite being deaf her whole life, Cheongah kept discovering new things with Yichan's childish antics.

For one, she wasn't aware that when your tummy grumbles, it makes a sound. She used to be so fascinated when Yichan catches on with her hunger, until Yichan told her that he "heard" it. The magic's gone, but Yichan said that he finds it really, really, really, really cute.

Next, when they once argued about a stupid balance game, Yichan deliberately closed his eyes as soon as he finished explaining his argument. Cheongah was dumbfounded, but it was the funniest thing she's ever witnessed.

Also, Cheongah was unaware that laughing does not only shorten your breath, but also makes a sound. So, when they were playing hide-and-seek with Watermelon Sugar, Yichan found her first, because she couldn't stop laughing from her hiding spot.

Yichan is so Yichan, yet his band members insisted that he's incredibly different around his girlfriend. It's because their loud, obnoxious, energetic frontman turns into the most gentle, quiet, careful lovesick boy in front of her.

They definitely tease Yichan about Cheongah.

When Yichan Got Into an Accident

Yichan never told Cheongah about it. He never called, never sent her a fax, never spoke about her, nor did he ask about her. He was at his lowest. He barely moved at all. He would shut his eyes when the doctors come. He would open the television, only to close it again, because he's constantly reminded that he lost his hearing.

Cheongah was set to leave with her father in a few days.. until Majoo. Majoo who refused to sit still and let Yichan's will deteriorate before him. Majoo who knocked on Cheongah's door, holding a notebook with words he carefully wrote over and over again. Majoo who broke the news, and saw Cheongah's face drop instantly.

There were so many things running in her mind: What happened? Who did this? How is Yichan? How can I make it better? How could this happen?

Cheongah somehow found the strings that connected the accident to her family, and that only made everything worse.

Still, Cheongah ran to see Yichan immediately and witnessed the helpless state he's in. It was as if some force sucked all the light in Yichan's eyes, yet he still smiled (a little) when he saw her.

Yichan refused to sign—answers reduced to nods when Cheongah sat by his side. It was a symbol of protest, because signing would only make everything seem more real.

"I'm here. I love you," Cheongah said, and the front that Yichan built since the accident crumbled to dust.

Yichan didn't know how much he needed Cheongah until he's in her arms, safe from everything outside of it.

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Let Him Cook. Literally.

I love obnoxiously written metaphors. I love it when it's so obvious that I can visualize the writers huddling in a room going: "That's it! That's the one!"

Because Babe didn't just offer to add the noodles—he's offering to be part of Charlie's life again. This is Babe's attempt to include himself back into Charlie's routines and activities, no matter how mundane they are. He doesn't ask if he should add the noodles, he asserts. Even before Charlie says anything, he adds the noodles anyway.

But Charlie is stubborn. His resolve is strong. He believes that what he's doing is the best for Babe (and everyone else), and so, he must handle the cooking on his own.

He wants Babe to let him cook—let him handle the things about Tony, Willy, and the world. Charlie wants Babe to wait, be taken care of/fed, and to be safe in his home. Which is so painful to watch, because Babe can cook. He can feed himself and Charlie. Charlie is completely disregarding Babe's capabilities and choices, all because Charlie thinks that the best thing in this situation is for him to finish the cooking.

When will they ever learn that it's so much better if they just cook together?

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i'm the pit babe watcher with no theories, no fan arts, no edits, not fanfics, no analysis, and some. i literally watch an episode and just beg for my comfort characters (kim and kenta) comfort FOR ONCE.

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He could barely hold his breath.

He knew about the vast distance between him and the lights his lover enjoys to watch. Ever stretching, never ending; that no amount of researchers or rockets can ever answer all the questions about them when there's so much more. So much more to learn about.

He wonders if he is like that—if he's a contribution to enthralling mysteries that no amount of effort can suffice to solve. 

And if he will ever discover what lies beyond a man who's fond of the stars by crossing the width of the universe in a single breath.

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There are so many things to talk about Kim and Mon in this episode, but I want to appreciate every little thing about these scenes in Dream World.

The way they are absolutely smitten with each other leaves me in awe.

Mon just attached himself to Kim, and he looks so beautiful (glowing) in Kim's presence, even when Kim is not exactly at his best. He sticks to Kim even though it's a school tour and his friends are probably around. It's like he tunnel visions into only seeing Kim, because he literally only bought 2 cotton candies when there's 4 of them together.

And then there's Kim. Oh, Kim.

The fact that he was equally sick as his friends after the ride, and still volunteered to play with Mon was so sweet and thoughtful. We actually see him collect himself—taking a deep breath and all—before smiling so wide, because it's Mon. Because it's what will make Mon happy. Mon's happiness ultimately extends to his own at this point.

We already unpacked that these two share a love language of doing things for each other, recognizing each other's needs without making things complicated, and being so upfront about what they feel that it doesn't take a genius to know that they're so gone for each other.

I usually hate fast pacing shows, but it only made sense for Kim and Mon to share their silly, awkward, and adorable confessions at this point of the story. They're just so simple. It makes them so beautiful together.

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The past year must have been crazy for all of them, but I think it's especially crazy for Babe.

He literally saw his boyfriend die before his eyes, got him back, watched his best friend die in his arms, and then reconnected with his father who used a halfbaked serum on his boyfriend (which ultimately, "killed" said boyfriend). Not long after, Charlie started racing again, went back to his old routine, and started participating in this research/experiment that basically treat him as a voluntary lab rat.

Well, yeah, he's not going to agree willingly. But Charlie is Charlie. He may act like a doormat, but he's passionate about doing whatever it takes to help Babe and other Special Alphas by extension. Babe obviously has issues accepting that, and I wonder if it'll fester into something worse in the near future.

After all, the worst that can happen is Charlie experiencing side-effects, his body rejecting the serum, or dying. None of those are easy to sit with, I think.

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The Eclipse and Boys in Love being filmed in the same school is so freakin' poetic. The World Remembers gang spent the entirety of The Eclipse fighting for the freedom to express themselves through their clothing and now, three years later in Boys in Love, uniforms have finally been abolished. The students are still just as queer as they were in The Eclipse, but now they're more comfortable in their queerness. I know the school in Boys in Love isn't meant to be Suppalo, but I kind of like to imagine that it is—that all of the pain Akk and Aye went through helped to make life just a little bit better for the queer people who came after them.

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Romance peaked here, I'm afraid.

There is something so sickenly romantic about Mon showing great interest on Doraemon after Kim's "recommendation".

Although my research might be off, I found that in the few hours they've been apart since the club meeting, Mon read over 46 chapters of the manga. Maybe even more, because the specific chapter they're talking about—Goodbye, Doraemon or Doraemon is Leaving?—is part of The Complete Works of Fujiko F. Fujio, a special edition that include never before published manga chapters.

Sure, it's not a lot to the standards of an average manga reader, but this might just be Mon's first manga ever. I'm also a gnarly reader who devours books after books in one sitting, so I know that changing mediums is difficult. (Or maybe that's just me, because I'm dyslexic, and takes days to finish a volume.)

Yet, Mon gave Kim's favorite book so much importance and care that he even called Kim to appreciate both the chapter and his analysis.

And that's really important when Kim felt incredibly inferior and insecure after the club meeting:

The thing is, Mon must've figured out by now that I'm just superficial and shallow. Mon reads Shakespeare's works, but I read Doraemon.

Mon buying so much manga in a single purchase, reading over 50 chapters in one sitting, and immediately calling Kim to gush about it was exactly what Kim needed. To be loved is to be seen.

I love stupid lovely boys completely smitten over each other.

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Punlee and Ghlaijia's miniscule screentime is a treat for book readers:

Yes, Ghlai likes the moon. Yes, Punlee was not subtle about his crush. Yes, Ghlai picks up on Punlee's flirting. Yes, they are a little awkward. Yes, Punlee seeks Ghlai out every single time. Yes, yes, yes.

I just wish they had Ghlai say, "I know" —when Punlee said his name.

My name is Sasin. It also means the moon.

It would have explained that Ghlai started liking the moon mainly because Punlee is "Sasin" (moon), not the other way around. Eitherway, I love the ambiguity of Punlee and Ghlaijia in this show.

— My Moon

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kim graduated from tinn's loser downbadism course

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[ inhale & exhale. ]

— after getting together, duang and qin have their first major fight.

Duang’s resignation from the conversation and from Qin’s presence alone must have been the tipping point. Not long after he gathered new blankets for the couch, Qin held the cuffs of his sweater, demanding the attention Duang refused to give. “Are you seriously going to keep acting this way? I’m trying here, Duang, but if you won’t let me, how am I supposed to make it right?”

pairing: duang x qin

genre: angst with a happy ending, hurt/comfort, making up, established relationship, couch cuddles, ambiguous arguments

read here!

[ 📝 NOTE ! i can't find anyone talking about duang with you, so i wrote my own fanfic about them. loosely based on the novel, because i read it! hope you enjoy. ]

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My favorite part about Your Sky of Us is definitely the Sustainable Development Goals earning ample screentime in almost all 3 episodes.

There's also the found family, but that only comes second.

No seriously, I adored and equally complained about this show from its exposition, but it did everything right with the characters and their dynamic.

Thank you, Your Sky, for giving us supportive and tight-knit friendships between kind-hearted, silly people. Everyone literally genuinely cared about each other, and it's beautiful to see friends involved and present in several aspects of Muenfah and Teerak's lives.

I'm sure they made college tolerable together.

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Brutally Honest Thoughts About Every DMD Friendship the Reality (It Takes Two) Pairing

It took me 6 months to finally watch this totally-not-dating-show, and I come bearing brutally honest thoughts about each couple.

I have to say that this season is less about finding a partner, and more about making it work. Although I enjoyed the "will they, won't they" aspect of last season, I admit that I have an appreciation for this one more. Most of the participants already have lined up works with a partner, so the show basically gives them what they need to build rapport: friendship time.

The structure of the show barely changed at all, except maybe the fact that there's significantly more people in this one than the last. Inevitability, there's gonna be a lot more "couples" this season, too.

So, here's my unsolicited thoughts on each one, because there's nothing more enjoyable for me than to perceive celebrities unprovoked.

NetJJ - The "Where Have You Been All My Life?"

I can barely formulate anything to think about these two. Obviously, they're ending up as partners one way or another, but the way they constantly seek each other out in the entire show does something magical to me.

Watching Net and JJ feels like watching a couple that has full confidence and faith in one another. They're not scared to be vulnerable and honest, because they know how difficult the path was to get to where they are today, and they accept all the difficulties that will meet them together eventually. It's a wonderful trade of support and assurance that they have each other's back.

Plus, the chemistry. Oh goodness, the chemistry.

While I honestly did not see how they could end up working at first, they solidified NetJJ after the zombie play. Net, especially, did a great job at making me believe that there is no way for him to live without JJ in the apocalypse, which is to be expected when he has quite an experience under his belt, but JJ... Oh, JJ. He keeps saying that he doesn't want to drag Net down, but he's literally so good. He provides a contrast to Net's soft, pleading eyes with his stern, determined expression. His character in the zombie play almost felt a little toxic, and I'm here for it!

They are both so good, individually and together. I can't wait to see what they have in store.

JimmyOhm - The "Just Married"

"It has the same vibe as a wedding ceremony," is an insane thing to say, by the way!

Jimmy could have worn something better, but I digress. He's literally all about Ohm the moment he arrived, and I love him for it. Compared to all the other couples, these two seem to have their own world every single time. I almost see hearts floating around when they're together! It's that bad.

They might just have the best chemistry in the show. No joke. They also have the most comfortable vibe together, because they don't shy away from any form of skinship. Jimmy literally laid on top of Ohm's chest for a cuddle one time, and Ohm instantly wrapped his arms around him like clockwork. They also won in the acting department, because that zombie play absolutely dominated. At this point, JimmyOhm and NetJJ should star in a dystopian film.

I don't know who made Jimmy believe that Ohm would hesitate to choose him as a partner, because they're obviously lying! Ohm literally starts glowing the moment he sees Jimmy in the show. They are so smitten. Parents.

PorTeetee - The "Right Person, Right Time"

If you know me, you should know by now that I absolutely love Teetee. So, I was ecstatic when he joined the show!

But nobody told me that Teetee and Por will carry this show for me. They give me the sugar of young, giggly love, and I caught myself losing my mind over these two to no avail. Teetee literally went "Hello, P'Por!" when they just entered the show, and I cried.

Wow, let me backtrack, because I forgot that DMD Friendship the Reality is, in fact, not DMD Dating Show.

Teetee and Por have the dynamic of a rom-com duo. They are so awkward that it makes them so charming—this is literally what the judges said about their robot play. Teetee gets so shy easily, and Por looks at him with adoring eyes every time. They are what good first dates look like—if that makes sense. Por keeps saying that they barely talked, and yet he's fixed with the decision to choose Teetee anyway. They work together, clicked, connected, or whatever it may be.

Also, their robot play was my favorite.

LatteKim - The "Will They or Won't They"

I have complex feelings about these two, because they reminded me of EP 1 KengNamping from the first season.

Kim has a special place in my heart, so it pisses me off when he's treated as unwanted. Work is work, I know, but damn, can Latte at least pretend to be a little happy to have Kim around? This unrequited love dynamic is not for the weak—me.

But then they spend friendship time together, and I start questioning everything that I feel about them.

So, Latte. He's a totally different person outside of a group setting. I should have known, because the way he acts with Kim in the hotel reminds me of how he was with FirstOne in that one special dinner. He's playful, flirty, and sweeter one-on-one. Him saying "I won't hesitate" before entering the canopy is probably the best representation of who he is. Latte is certain of who he's choosing upon entering the show, and his lack of gusto to grow closer to Kim probably stems from the fact that he doesn't have to do that anymore. Latte doesn't owe us—me—anything, and I should respect that.

They really need to work on the acting chemistry though.

AuauSave - The "One That (Almost) Got Away"

Absolutely nobody can write something like this.

Auau and Save are the most surprising bunch I've seen in this show. They might as well write a book about the emotional roller coaster they took us in, because it was peak "hurt/comfort" if you think about it.

AuauSave are the PorTeetee and LatteKim combined. The best of both worlds, except it means that they both have the quality of being awkward and having the one-sided love dynamic in the clutch.

It was difficult for me to watch them navigate their relationship in early episodes, because Save has the biggest heart and the smallest self-esteem. He thinks he's never good enough for anything in the show, and that includes Auau—god, Save is going to be the end of me. Then, we get Auau. Auau who literally cries about being a failure, because he has battles to deal with within him. It's so devastating to watch the mess that they are when you see how talented and good they are already.

It's unfortunate that we don't see them act together during the challenge, but the canopy moment totally makes up for it. I don't even know where to begin!

First of all, Save is so evil for making Auau think that he's alone in this, because he literally looks like he's about to cry. But I don't blame him at all.

This is the first time Save admits to feeling this way about Auau's actions, and I stand by whatever choices he makes after this. Supporting gay rights and wrongs.

Auau's reaction to finally seeing Save is absolutely magical. He's speechless, he's smiling, he's grateful, he's heartbroken, he's happy, he's everything all at once. It's cute to see the both of them so upfront about what they feel, and I kid you not that nothing can replicate this moment in reality show history!

If you catch me rewatching Your Sky, it's definitely because of them. They are literally RealHia in real life.

Anyway, go check out all the episodes of DMD Friendship the Reality (It Takes Two)! It's a treat to see subversions of traditional male friendships every single time.

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[ come home with me. ]

— faifa breaks down.

After a painstaking year of not understanding Yotha, Wine taught him all the ways to love like a savior. Suddenly, every stupid thing about Yotha and Gun made sense, because Wine can run him over twice with a monster truck and he’ll forgive him in a heartbeat. Oh god, he’s crazy about Wine.

home. a dwelling.

pairings: faifa x wine

genre: post-canon, established relationships, established faifa/wine (perfect 10 liners), tooth-rotting fluff, light angst, moving in together, misunderstandings, boys in love, boys kissing

read here!

[ 📝 NOTE ! english is not my first language, and i stopped writing for awhile, so this is gonna be a little bit wonky. i honestly don't know what this is, but enjoy! ]

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I Don't Like Mother (But I Understand Faifa)

Are we surprised? Apparently, Dir. Siwaj has a reputation of wrapping up complex traumas after one conversation over dinner.

I personally think Perfect 10 Liners introduced a compelling family conflict. Bad mothers are no new concept—both in cinema and reality, unfortunately—but putting the focus on how siblings experience "bad mother" is an interesting multifaceted take. We don't experience people the same way, and Perfect 10 Liners, with Yotha and Faifa, are perfect examples of this.

It's just that.. it could have been handled so much better.

Years of trauma is not something you can resolve overnight, especially not over one dinner. It's unfair for Faifa to constantly feel unwanted, unloved, and uncared for by his mother all his life only to forgive her because she apologized once or twice. Apologizing is a start, but she's done that before, during Yotha's arc. Right after that, she still made him wait at the airport for 5 hours anyway.

I always called Faifa a doormat. He's kind, helpful, and is so scared of letting people down. There is nothing wrong with that, until he's obviously compromising his well-being and happiness for the benefit of others. While he's changing slowly; the tendencies remain with his mother, even if the show refuses to acknowledge that that is what's happening.

Faifa makes sense of what she said. Faifa makes do with it. I'm probably projecting, but as a child with strained relationships with their parents, I resonate with Faifa's unsatisfying resolve. Overtime, parents who wronged you will start to treat you kindly, much more lovingly, and you will just have to deal with the fact that you no longer have a place to put down all of the baggage they left you when they were still figuring things out.

Parents can have issues—they are not perfect—but nobody can tell me that Faifa was rightfully separated from his brothers, raised in a foreign country, and thrown back once he's no longer needed.

Faifa makes do with what his mother said, because he will not get anything better. This is the closest he can get to the apology and explanation he deserves, even if it's not even half of what he's entitled to.

At least there's Wine. Thank god there's Wine.

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Just how often was Faifa on that rooftop during YothaGun's story. How much pain did we not get to see because he wasn't the focus of the story? How often was he suffering alone before Wine showed up?