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For anyone wondering, the context of this post was me reading Homestuck in quarantine rather than in middle school, which was ironically a time where I was invested in choose-your-own-adventure stories

It’s like craving a ham sandwich for years but forcing yourself to eat salad because everyone else around you is eating salad and all of the stores only sell salads. But then, you move out of town and you have to go to the store. And there’s so much more than some shitty salads. There’s a wholeass variety of foods you never saw because you were stuck in fucking Saladtown. So of course you rush straight to the ham section of the store because you’re craving it, remember???? But you learn that the entire pig factory burned down last week and all that’s left is the bacon remains. And you’re just like fuck it some pig is better to hog than none. So you just. Fucking forget buying salad and eat the shitty ass bacon. And the shitty bacon is shitty but you still eat it and enjoy it because it’s Fucking. Bacon. But the entire time you’re eating it, you can’t help but think that if you had come to the store just last week. Or if you had ever gone to any fucking store outside of Saladtown. You could’ve had that delicious ham meat but instead you spent fucking yeARS EATING SHITTY SALAD YOU NEVER EVEN LIKED.

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Well, at least I was right about the chaos...

Your ten most recent emojis describe how the 2020s will go for you

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It’s like craving a ham sandwich for years but forcing yourself to eat salad because everyone else around you is eating salad and all of the stores only sell salads. But then, you move out of town and you have to go to the store. And there’s so much more than some shitty salads. There’s a wholeass variety of foods you never saw because you were stuck in fucking Saladtown. So of course you rush straight to the ham section of the store because you’re craving it, remember???? But you learn that the entire pig factory burned down last week and all that’s left is the bacon remains. And you’re just like fuck it some pig is better to hog than none. So you just. Fucking forget buying salad and eat the shitty ass bacon. And the shitty bacon is shitty but you still eat it and enjoy it because it’s Fucking. Bacon. But the entire time you’re eating it, you can’t help but think that if you had come to the store just last week. Or if you had ever gone to any fucking store outside of Saladtown. You could’ve had that delicious ham meat but instead you spent fucking yeARS EATING SHITTY SALAD YOU NEVER EVEN LIKED.

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You know how people “reverted back to their cringey middle school phase” during quarantine?

Homestuck has been like that for me. Except I never even knew Homestuck existed until a year ago. And even then, I forgot about it until two weeks ago.

Anyway, reading Homestuck has made me a fucking mess because it’s like I’m getting emotional/mental validation 5+ years too late

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Has anyone made an Ouran High School Host Club AU where it’s wlw????? My gay little ass yearns for that more than I yearn for Haruhi

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It’s times like these I really want to ask what the fuck goes down in JJBA

The lines between being a monster fucker, a casual furry and a touch-starved idiot have really began to blur for me.

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A BoTW Mafia AU

Tw: violence? The way the Champions fall is not pretty

There were 2 gangs: Hylia and Yiga. They fought over the possession of 4 main business investments notoriously known as the Divine Beasts.

Four upcoming prodigies of the Hylian gang were tasked to lead an attack against the Yiga. Revali was chosen for his long-range combat, Daruk was chosen for his defense, Urbosa was chosen for close-range combat and Mipha was chosen for her medical prowess. A fifth prodigy—Rhoam’s daughter, Zelda—insisted to be included as well. She was accepted on the condition that she must have the family bodyguard, Link, around her at all times during the operation. All six were collectively called The Champions; their families were confident that they would be the ones to defeat the Yiga gang.

The Champions opted to wait until the Yiga attacked first, but that proved to be a dire mistake. The Yiga had elected a champion of their own, Ganon, and under his supervision, they managed to take down the Divine Beasts and the prodigies through brute force.

Revali lost his eyesight along with his pride. Daruk got beaten within an inch of his life protecting Mipha and is now bedridden, unable to act as shield of defense. Urbosa had her all her hands/fingers broken; she may never be able to clench her firsts again. Mipha was fatally shot, which led to her being in a coma. Zelda was taken hostage by Ganon; when Link tried to protect her, the front of his head was bashed in to the point of causing amnesia and losing his mouth’s motor skills. Weakened by the loss of the Divine Beasts and their Champions, the Hylia gang split into 5 smaller gangs according to their respective neighborhoods.

It’s been 3 months now since Ganon has taken over Hyrule and someone has to take him and the clan down. Nobody says it out loud, but they all know that the original Champions are in no real condition to fight. But that doesn’t stop Link from rallying the gangs together again, rescuing Zelda and taking the Divine Beasts.

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The lines between being a monster fucker, a casual furry and a touch-starved idiot have really began to blur for me.

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If Sidon had sex with cis Link, he’d be terrified because Link doesn’t have two dicks

If Sidon had sex with trans Link, he’d be terrified because Link doesn’t have a cloaca

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Okay so a viravos au where Aaravos is the demon Viren sees during sleep paralysis

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I’m enjoying The Dragon Prince so far…

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I don’t care how inactive I’ve been; I HAVE an obsession with Viravos right now and y’all HAVE to see what’s made me cackle for the last hour

Aaravos: Is clearly Not Good™. Fully ready to fuck shit up. Actual manipulater.

Tumblr: Soft boi. Lil starry baby. Will fuck for freedom.

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✨🥺☹️🌹🖕👏🏼🥴🤪😎👀

Oh god I’m gonna be chaotic as fuck for the latter half of the decade....

Your ten most recent emojis describe how the 2020s will go for you

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FREE PADS AND TAMPONS

Hey all you lovely people who have periods, the world is starting to look a little bit brighter now that certain tampon/pad companies have started to allow people to receive small kits and samples of pads, maxi pads, liner, and tampons for free. And I mean 100% free and discreet. You just have to give them your address and name, and bam! You’ve got all the menstrual cycle products you could ever need for no cost. Links below!

U by Kotex

Always

Playtex

Poise

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PLEASE SHARE THIS USEFUL INFORMATION IT COULD SAVE LIVES

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bi and pan people!!!!! are neat!!!!!!!!

reblogging this is not mandatory but it is highly recommended!