quaremorito

[quaremorito]

About Me ⚜

Hi there! My name is Cee, I'm 26 and I'm starting a digital garden here, or more, a place where I can be a little pretentious but also hopefully helpful compared to my main, which is mostly for shitposting and having a good old time. I think it is helpful to have a place where I can switch into a more focused mind rather than just scrolling aimlessly.

This will be a place where I am intentioned with my relationship to the internet. Everything will have a slightly wizards-flavor, because I'm obsessed with M*hoyaku but I hope it will also be a place where we can ask more of ourselves and other. To focus on improving indefinitely.

[quaremorito]

Free Your Brain - #01: Alternative Search Engines

This is the first in a series of posts dedicated to helping you free yourself from the ways corporations are using internet users for profit to the user's detriment. I want to encourage exploration and the joy of the internet of my youth - of exploring and finding new pathways. This list is not comprehensive and it may grow to be outdated. Regardless, this was pretty successful on bsky, so I'm porting it over here! 1. Qwant - A very good replacement for Google. It is the most similar search engine on this list to Google's heyday. I get precise results compared to similar searches made on Google.

2. Wiby - Discover smaller sites that are typically made by hobbists or academics. This search engine focuses on sites that are older or lightweight (as in, less bloated by scripts that many modern sites rely on). Good for falling down a rabbit hole and finding blogs or personal websites!

3. Newgle - Search engine for sites that don't use certain generic top-level domains (that is what is the .com in tumblr.com). The disincluded domains include .com, .net and .org. I don't use this very often, and right now it seems to have a problem where it is indexing bsky.social (which is maybe not the kinds of things that someone would want to find while searching it) but nice to keep in mind.

4. Marginalia - Really good search engine for deep-diving and discovery. It's focus is on independence and on traditional information retrieval, rather than the natural-language search that google has oriented itself towards. It is meant as a compliment to other search engines.

5. Search my Site - Independent user-submitted site, great for personal web sites, but does not crawl the internet itself, so it is limited to what is sent in.

These are the one's that I use most and discover much on, but its far from the /only/ search engines out there. Here is a more complete list of search engines for your own perusal.

The internet is a wide place. Don't let corporations fool you into thinking it has been tamed. Instead, think of the corporate internet as a city, paved down and developed highly, but it cannot overtake the abundant wilds of the world.

[quaremorito]

[quaremorito]

VELVET GOLDMINE (1998) dir. Todd Haynes

[quaremorito]

Jenny Holzer, Protect Me From What I Want, date unknown

[quaremorito]

hi hiii, i saw you complaining about bad owen takes and i wanna ask about your owen takes! What are the biggest misconceptions you see people have about him? What are some things that more casual fans tend to miss/not notice? What do you think of the normal owen and kizu owen split?

feel free to make this as detailed or as simplified as you wish ~☆ i just like seeing people talk about their favorite wizards!

OMG IVE been thinking about how to answer this for days IM SO EXCITED TO YAP!

I will start though that I don't have a lot about Kizu atm, because there's a LOT there but we really don't see Kizu!Owen very often. I know we're a tad behind on event translations, but.... I don't think he's been in an event or card story since Main Story 2 wrapped up, other than Owen's Walpurgis 4koma.... can we have a moment of silence for Kizu!Owen likers? I miss our sweetie. And more.. hi this is Cee after writing all of the below I got really inspired to start working on a handful of character essays so expect those in the tag at some point..

In terms of misconceptions, I think the biggest ones I see are that Owen is incapable of knowingly doing a positive thing. Or that he isn't capable of being kind, compassionate or merciful. (dodges rocks). I get why people who aren't total Owenheads come to this conclusion. It's easy to take what is said about Owen (and the Northies as a whole) as gospel, in fact, I think the Northerner's serve a really interesting role in the thematic relevance of prejudice against wizards. After all, in MS1, the reader gets one small look at Owen after the Calamity battle where he is with the other Northies plus Oz as an introduction, four lines of dialogue and then he is gone for forty-thousand words. While he is off-screen, we only ever hear negative things about him - Heathcliff says he's scary, Cain tells Akira about his eye and to not listen to a thing Owen says, the Previous Sage calls him maddening and creepy and basically every other character who talk about the Northies calling them the Worst Ever. Not a great first impression, and there is a lot of time for that perception to sink in and go unchallenged. And I'll admit, even after they officially make their debut at the party, the Northies don't go out of their way to challenge that perception obviously - why would they? after all, words are a curse and titles a burden; they've all carried the title of Northerner for so very long, can someone please write something about Oz's Balcony speech I think there are a lot of reasons for why Owen's role in the party was so fraught (and I go into them a little here although that post is more part-vent part-summary of an event card spurred by an ex-oomfs twt vague than proper analysis)

But it's not just how long that we are only told of the Northies vices or their lack of defense; even after their introduction and all throughout the stories, trusted figures, like the Twins (which trusting them is dubious...) and Oz, reinforce the idea of Owen being entirely malevolent and insane. Owen is evil because Owen is the Northern Wizard Owen. He seeks to twist your heart into a withering husk. But does he really?

I think the biggest misconception is that Owen's one and true goal in life is to cause chaos and misery, to reap untold amounts of violence. That's a goal he would never deny having, but he didn't deny killing Nicholas either, did he? This perception about what Owen wants (when he doesn't even really know it himself) puts on blinders, where the times that he is benign or even kind or compassionate get overlooked, over explained and twisted into wickedness by other wizards. Those words might be slightly too warm for him, but I know for a fact there is a case to be made for him being merciful and having a more nuanced relationship with killing and death than others would believe. I think there are many events which showcase the nicer parts of his personality (one of my faves is Winter 2022; his part in it is relatively small but it showcases a unique facet of his relationship with lies/truths as well as the gap between him causing misery versus, but we've seriously had so many banger events.)

But luckily, even if one doesn't want to scour through the backlog of miscellaneous events to see these traits on display (or are one of the people who only take Bunta's writing as law of the world), we see Owen act in contrary ways to the ideal of a wicked Northern wizard all throughout the main stories and anniversaries, in big and small ways.

In particular, I think in all of the excitement of the final showdown in the second Anniversary, the details that Bunta had written in regarding Owen's involvement is overlooked. They are, after all, small things compared to the great feats of magic that Akira is witnessing.

Spoilers below for anni2 for any anime-onlys or fandom newcomers, welcome and I hope dearly we get to see that animated one day.

First, and this is so important to me, throughout the fight, Akira states that Owen is keeping one hand on his hat to prevent himself from losing it. At this point, they have already made the transformation into their event outfits. As in most events, Anni2's clothes were tailored by our dear Chloe. Owen does have a bit of a fashionista streak (that's something I think can be missed too, that he has a genuine interest in style) but not to the extent that he is typically that cautious with his outfits. There have definitely been times he's allowed clothes to get ripped, torn or otherwise ruined. So him going to the effort to make sure he doesn't lose this accessory is noteworthy. After all, he does have other hats. While Owen is stated to be using a rapier in this fight, typically the stance used for it has the other arm lowered; as I understand it, that aids balance and power. Owen isn't using the rapier as a channeling tool, he is actively slashing at Oz with it. So, he is putting himself at a disadvantage by keeping his arm in that position. That is - Owen cares more about keeping the hat that was given to him by Chloe than he cares about giving 100% to a fight against the strongest wizard in the world, when he comes from a place where strength is the defining characteristic.

Then, ironically, this hat then serves as a way for Owen to shield his heart from the western wizard once the fight is over. As the fighters are recollecting themselves and going off to lick their wounds, Owen stumbles in pain. To everyone's surprise, Chloe catches him. This is a moment of kindness, but it is also a direct acknowledgement of Owen's current weakness. Yet, despite such a thing being a direct jab to any Northerner's pride, Owen barely lashes out at him at all. Even though he was irritated from the results of the battle, he simply stares, likely just as surprised as everyone else that someone would support him, then tells Chloe to leave him alone. Akira says an expression of hurt crosses Chloe's face and, seeing that, Owen pulls the hat over his eyes and looks away before disappearing.

Owen would have the entire world believe he loves misery of all kinds, loves being the cause of it. These negative emotions are the driving point of his magic and he certainly just used a lot of mana in the fight against Oz. So, why would he just walk away - not just walk away, look away - from a chance to not just push back against Chloe's kindness, but a way for him to generate negativity and "refuel"? An argument could be made that his lack of his typical wordy rejection, laden with insults, is just a consequence of the fight - he's tired, humiliated, not even desserts can lift his mood. Owen just wants to go and sulk.

I think if that was the case, this would be an isolated incident. But we see him look away from or react similarly to other's true multiple other times. He looks similarly irritated (or even guilty) in his affection story after he told Akira he hated them.

This post is getting pretty long so I'm going to wrap up quickly, but another incident happens during the fight that I think should be focused on more:

When faced with the opportunity to kill Arthur, and deal a horrible wound to Oz's heart by doing so, Owen hesitates. The wizard who doesn't care about anyone or anything, who is alone completely, who loves violence and bloodshed, who wants to see nothing more than Oz's face twist in agony has a chance to inflict utter despair upon many of the wizards in the manor

and he hesitates.

What a crazy good character. I could make an essay off of a single line of Owen's dialogue if needed, he's so seriously rich in layers.

Other things I think can get missed: his sentimentality (see: his efforts to keep his hat, but also how he has reacted when handed certain gifts (also talked about that above), the multiple times he's exorcised or otherwise helped souls move on (unfortunately one of my favorite examples is a now-deleted card story if anyone backed up his 2nd mahopa or would be interested in translating it..), the multiple times he acts as an impromptu teacher for the younger wizards. There's definitely more and I can expand on all of these but I'm getting sleepy... thank you for the question and feel free to let me know if i should clarify something or if im forgetting something major. THANK YOU FOR THE QUESTION!

[quaremorito]

[INDEX] Sonatina of the Perverse and Intoxicating Service (Completed)

"Even if I'm laughed at and ridiculed, I like living freely as I please, however I feel like it. If I can't do that, it’s better for me to just turn to stones."

Characters: Shylock, Owen, Oz, Mitile, Akira.

I don't know what I'm reading 80% of the time I translate this because it sounds like a fanfiction but apparently, it's not.

Also, should I warn that there is collar and chain involved....

Episode 1 Episode 2 Episode 3 Episode 4 Episode 5 Episode 6 Episode 7 Episode 8 Episode 9 Episode 10

This Sonatina is actually a really interesting read because honestly, we rarely see these two interact. Although I feel the "similarity" between them is a bit forceful (as individuality is something all wizards have anw and not just them), the portrayal of Shylock in this event is well done. I always like his crazy side more than the gentle, polite side because we all know he is not just your local friendly bartender. So, seeing him bet his life just to make an "according to keikaku" moment at the end, is pretty awesome.

Wish they could dig more deeply into Shylock's loneliness tho.

[quaremorito]

[quaremorito]

I like his lil cartoon network ass smile

[quaremorito]

my girl wronged by the narrative, my girl haunting her own story, my girl dead in the first act, my girl the blank in between the lines, my girl the phantom of the past the apparition of the future

[quaremorito]

[quaremorito]

they hate me for finding romance in the violent & violence in the romantic. also for the killing

[quaremorito]

[quaremorito]

BITE THE HAND

[quaremorito]

Kuromi 🦇💜

[quaremorito]

"Wolf in a Village"

Drawn by me in 2017 Software: Paint Tool SAI