quotes-from-cybertron - Tumblr blog

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Fire in the Sky physical copies!

I made it a campaign so it'll be easier to collect your address for shipping. There needs to be at least 25 people who buy one for this to work since that's the minimum amount of copies that can be printed.

If you have any questions please message me or send an ask!

You will be sent an email asking for your address if the project does get funded. Thank you so much for your interest!

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HOUND: Mirage. Did you seriously just abandon Bumblebee at the outskirts of the grazing area? You KNOW that he's at increased risk of predation as one of the weaker, sicklier members of the herd.

MIRAGE: (whispering) If only.

BUMBLEBEE: I don't think I like this conversation.

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RODIMUS: It's actually okay to break traffic laws if you think about them for awhile and decide they are stupid.

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STARSCREAM: Wait, you like me for my personality?

SKYFIRE: I'm as surprised as you are.

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STARSCREAM: Having another cheat day I see.

RODIMUS: (stops eating his cake) Getting cheated on by your boyfriend, I see.

STARSCREAM: Excuse me?!

RODIMUS: Yeah, you're worried about the wrong person eating cake right now. 'Cause your man's out there eating someone else's cake!

STARSCREAM: OH MY PRIMUS!

RODIMUS: YEAH!

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MEGATRON: Yeah, sex is great, if you're into that sort of thing, but have you ever considered blasphemy or moderate-to-severe heresy directed at the tyrant who calls himself "Primus"?

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SCENE - RATCHET & FIRST AID talking as they work together to reattach RODIMUS'S arm

FIRST AID: I mean how many mechs can a grumpy overworked medic have dated?

RATCHET: 56.

FIRST AID: What.

RATCHET: I had about 56 lovers. Of course that was before the war. I probably would have had more but once I started running the clinic and got promoted to Head Medic I had bigger concerns.

FIRST AID: 56? 56?

RODIMUS: Oh, Primus. This is amazing. I have never been so glad to be injured.

FIRST AID: What do you mean you had 56 lovers?! You told me you hadn't ever fully interfaced until Drift! He was your first serious relationship!

RATCHET: You can see someone without going straight to swapping cables, popping panels, or flashing you Spark, kid.

FIRST AID: No you can't!

RATCHET & FIRST AID: (stare at each other)

FIRST AID: If that were true Ratchet–that would–that would mean you were a slut.

RODIMUS: (exaggerated gasp) Aid!

RODIMUS: How can you say that! So RATCHET had 56 lovers in a single orn. He isn’t a slut.

RATCHET: (eyes him distrustfully)

RODIMUS: (catches his gaze and grins) He is THE Slut. He is the Prime of all Sluts. The Party Ambulance that always rides at the end of the night. He is the easiest mech in this room.

FIRST AID: You take that back.

RODIMUS: THE SLUTS (gestures to himself and FIRST AID, grinning widely) ARE DEAD LONG LIVE THE PARTY AMBULANCE!

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SCENE - Swerve's, NAUTICA sitting alone, approached by SKIDS

SKIDS: (winks) So what's a bot need to do to get a drink around here?

NAUTICA: You ask at the bar for one and then exchange it for shanix.

[THREE DAYS LATER]

NAUTICA: (showering) Wait a second-

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RODIMUS: Before I realized I have ADHD I just thought it was normal to get absolutely nothing done the entire day for no good reason and then complete 90% of my tasks from 4:51 PM to 4:58 PM.

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RUNG: Alright, so we typically call these things a "traumatic event", not a "bruh moment" or "major L".

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RODIMUS: Yeah, I got the big weepy baby disease on top of the stupid bitch disease and it sucks. LMAO.

RATCHET: Please just call them depression and anxiety.

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STARSCREAM: You're going to hit me, Onslaught? Better make it count, better make it hurt, better kill me in one shot. Megatron can tell you exactly what happens to those who don't.

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DAMUS: 'Most likely to start a cu-'. Skywarp.

SKYWARP: (chokes, giggles, and coughs)

SKIDS: (elbows DAMUS)

DAMUS: (huffs but turns away) What did you guys get in your year book?

THUNDERCRACKER: 'Prettiest Smile'.

TRAILBREAKER: 'Nicest Personality'.

SKYWARP: 'Most likely to start a bar fight'.

SKIDS: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one'.

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SCENE - RUMBLE and FRENZY sneak into an Autobot Base.

-

RUMBLE: Don't worry buddy we're from the union.

SUNSTREAKER: (leans forward, whispers) We don't even have dental.

FRENZY: They don't even have dental.

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SENTINEL PRIME: "Comrade in arms"? Yeah, I bet he was in your arms. Every night. Fruit.

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Quotes from; https://at.tumblr.com/boudicca/comrade-in-arms-yeah-i-bet-he-was-in-your-arms/0hnz7vnyje6y

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SCENE - FIRST POST-WAR SCIENCE CONFERENCE

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PERCEPTOR: (drunk) Decepticon scientists all think they're hot slag for their "Cybertronian experimentation" or whatever BUT look at those fucking sample sizes! n=6? Frag you. Get like two hundred petrorats and achieve statistical significance, you cowards.

SHOCKWAVE: Illogical, I did the power calculations, I can get significance with ten subjects.

TARANTULAS: Oh nice. I just kidnapped a whole town and used everyone there.

SHOCKWAVE: Wasteful. A whole town? For one experiment?

BRAINSTORM & NAUTICA: ...

SKYFIRE: What the fuck?

SCORPONOK: (cooing at the abomination in his chest)

BOMBSHELL: What the hell are statistics?

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STARSCREAM: (waking up after concussion) Where are we?

MEGATRON: (sarcastic) The Well of All Sparks.

STARSCREAM: Really? Didn't think I'd make it here.

STARSCREAM: (looks over Megatron) Definitely didn't think you would.

STARSCREAM: I don't know whether to be relieved or disappointed at Primus being distinctly less picky than everyone said.