qzawhateverilike

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Tommy: Why are you following me? Buck: Because we’re dating now. Tommy: Okay… what about Eddie? Eddie: We’re a package deal. Buck: Buy one idiot, get one free.

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Bobby: Eddie, you'll be working with Buck and Tommy, stabilizing the victim during the helicopter ride while we wait for you here on land.

Eddie: Alright! My fantasy threesome!

Buck: *smirking at Tommy*

Tommy: *rolling his eyes at Buck*

Rest of the 118: *staring at Eddie*

Eddie, blushing: You know... of people on a team.

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*It's 3 am during a 24-hour shift at the 118 with no calls*

Ravi: How does one even do cpr on a giraffe?

Eddie: Ravi, why? Babe, don't listen to him, just get back to bed.

Buck, already on his phone: Hyperfixation, here I go.

Ravi: If they choke on something is that the end for them?

Hen: You got me texting my veterinarian friend at 3 am, I hope you're happy.

Chim: Now I need to know too. Ravi, you're grounded.

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Eddie: Ok, so pretend I'm interviewing you for the captain position. Tell me, what are your strengths? Buck: I fall in love too quickly. Eddie: And what are your weaknesses, then? Buck: Your beautiful eyes and that ass of yours. Eddie: Request denied! But see me after I'm done, and maybe you can show me how much you love this ass.

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Captain Chim: Hen where is your partner?

Hen: Eddie wasn't feeling well this morning.

Captain Chim: We need someone to fill in for Eddie.

Ravi: Well Buck isn't here either so I think he's already filling Eddie.

Hen, high-fiving him: Oh, you're bad.

Captain Chim: Wait, Buck is also absent? At the same time as Eddie? Gay people can be so annoying.

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Buck, watching thirst traps of Eddie on his phone: That ass of yours should be illegal. Bobby: Language! Buck, still scrolling: Y no muerde ese perro culazo que te cargas? Hen: Now, he learns another language. Chim: I respect his commitment. Bobby: That's not what I meant! Eddie, making bedroom eyes at Buck: Are you thirsting over me in spanish? Suddenly I'm ovulating and you need to do something about it. Ravi: This doesn't feel like a safe space anymore.

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Buck: Those eye bags look awful. You had a bad sleep?

Eddie: I woke up way too many times during the night.

Buck: Was it my snoring? I'm sorry babe, I-

Eddie: Buck, your snoring is the literal white noise that calms me down when I want to fall asleep again, you're fine.

Buck: Well, you're having problems maintaining sleep and I read this study that says that having an orgasm before bed helps you relax so...

Eddie: Are you seriously offering your dick as a sleeping aid?

Buck: Hey, don't knock it until you ride it.

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Hen: How was your 1st official Father's day, Buck?

Ravi: Why official? Wait, did you get Eddie pregnant?

Eddie: Ravi, a month of sewer rescues are calling your name right now.

Buck: Official because Chris asked me to adopt him, and honestly Hen it was a lot of crying.

Chim: And a lot of food, I saw those bbq pics. You went all out.

Eddie: Buck wanted to recreate the Diaz parrillada, and he did it perfectly.

Buck: Also, I can finally use this old clipboard full of dad jokes on Chris that I got from Bobby. I get to make dad jokes now and make him cringe 24/7. Life is great.

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Buck, on his phone: Now that's the life.

Eddie: Are you watching the desensitizing horses video again?

Hen: You wanna be a professional horse botherer? I guess you can't completely take the Buckaroo out of the farm.

Ravi: Imagine emoting around a horse all day for work.

Buck: Spooked horses are dangerous to themselves and those around them, so desensitizing them is very important.

Hen: Isn't that what Bobby did with Buck when Eddie started working here?

Ravi: Did Bobby pick up Eddie and swung him around like a ferret in front of Buck?

Chim, laughing: That's an image I'll never forget now. Rav, you're relieved from latrine duty for being hilarious.

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*The 118 at LA's 2025 pride parade*

Chim: I think your shirt is missing a word.

Eddie: No, it was always supposed to be like this.

Hen: So it really is "save a horse, ride a " with a blank at the end?

Ravi: How is that in theme with pride again?

Eddie: It will make sense, just wait a minute.

Buck, in a white shirt with only "cowboy" on it: Hey babe, sorry for being late.

Eddie: I hate to leave you guys, but my ride is here.

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Chim: Guys come on, Bobby's gone, and we have to choose a new captain. Eddie: Propaganda I'm not falling for. Chim: Me being captain? Eddie: Bobby being dead. Buck: Can't we all take turns being interim captain until he comes back? Hen: Now that's propaganda I'm falling for. Chim: None of you know what propaganda is, do you? Buck: I think it’s when a British person takes a good look at something.

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Eddie, Facetiming Buck: Hey babe, I'm watching the kids, and they asked for fried dinosaur for breakfast? Please help.

Buck: I think they're asking for empanadasauruses. I made it for them the other day.

Mara & Jee in the background: Hi uncle Buck!

Eddie: They say hi. So, dinosaur shaped empanadas?

Buck: Yeah, think of a stegosaurus and you'll get it.

Eddie: Would you help me shape them?

Buck: You know I love it when you're my sous chef, and I get to order you around.

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Jee: Uncle Buck, you better eat fast before all the food is gone. Daddy and uncle Eddie are already eating desert!

Buck: Just let me get to a stopping point first.

Jee: Ok, but I heard that if you read too much, you turn into a yucky bug.

Buck, smiling: What kind of bug would that be Jee? A jumping spider, a dung beetle, maybe an atlas moth?

Jee: No, uncle Buck, you turn into a bookworm!

Buck, laughing: Oh, I'll make sure to not read too much then.

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Chim: So what did you guys do in that super romantic and secret date you got planed Buck?

Buck: We had a picnic at the beach, and after that we tried to find rocks that looked like each other's eyes.

Ravi: That sounds fire. Did you manage to find them?

Eddie: It took us a while, but we did. We even found Christopher's.

Hen: You were always such a romantic at heart, Buckaroo.

Chim: Not gonna lie that sounds amazing, sorry for doubting you.

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Buck: I hate it when someone makes me be mean.

Eddie: What happened now?

Chim: I think someone *cough* Ravi *cough* put an aluminum container in the microwave and broke it.

Hen: Again? That's the 2nd one this year.

Buck: Like I was a pocketful of sunshine until you did that.

Ravi: I didn't do anything!

Buck: Yet I'm a pocketful of chainsaws now and you better start running.

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Hen: Remember guys, for every other month of the year you had to say "let me get this straight" but that's over now.

Eddie: Do we say "let me get this gay" now?

Ravi: I always liked saying "let's get one thing straight and two things gay" during pride.

Buck: Good choices but for this pride month, you have to say "just so we're queer"

Chim: The A-shift- Sorry, the gAy-shift will comply with this request.

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Isabel: Oh, is it time for Los Jibbities already? I must have missed it on my calendar.

Buck: Are we celebrating something?

Isabel: Of course we should all be celebrating, shouldn't we?

Buck: Ok, so "los jibbities" is a happy thing? It's not like something's giving you the heebie-jeebies?

Eddie: Which would've been my one and only guess.

Isabel: Los heebie-jeebies? Now you're making things up.

Eddie: No, you're right, the time for los jibbities is coming up. Is this a season?

Isabel: Yes, the season for love, the season for pride.

Buck: Ok, so los jibbities...

Isabel: Yeah, sound it out.

Eddie: Los. Jibbities. LGBTs!

Isabel: Si, mira because you're gay.

Eddie, laughing: You couldn't just say pride season?

Buck: Happy los jibbities month to you too, abuela.