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[raphieeee]

Just realised that my self-insert fic where I’m the brothers younger sibling just reached 15,000 words… there’s not even a plot anymore

[raphieeee]

Leo would like star wars both because Han is basically a space cowboy and because Luke kissed his sister so at least he’s not that bad right guys? Guys? Please…?

[raphieeee]

CW: fighting, betting, graphic depictions of violence

For a long time, Raph felt a itch in under his skin. It wasn’t painful or something terminal, just uncomfortable. It was one of those subtle things that drove a person slightly mental, like the hum or leaky pipe no one could find.

Training helped better than anything, especially meditation which just made him pissy and aggravated. It truely started to get better when they went to the surface, when he was able to fight without having to be careful of breaking his siblings bodies. He could be rough and mean, could run for hours and let his knuckles crack and bleed without getting yelled at. He wasn’t told to hold back to be careful, or at least if he managed to sneak away from his brothers.

It wasn’t really a surprise of how it developed, but more so how it did for him specifically. Anyone else, it would make sense, but a Mutant Turtle joining a underground fight club with one of the most egregious betting system he had ever seen? That was surprising.

Raph found it on accident and was only able to get in because of his ninja training. It was a large space under an old apartment complex that was once a two layered carpark that had the middle floor gutted. It had a whole bar built in as well as several rows of seats on the lower floor. The higher floor was for the VIP’s and where the biggest bets were made.

Raph joined on accident, being bumped around until one of the organises spotted him and offered him a round if he removed his weapons.

Not a single question was asked about his physical body, not even when he won the round with a bruise blooming on his jaw that showed it was real.

Raph would like to say it was just the thrill of the fight, of beating the guy bloody as the man twice his size had jeered at him, that it was just how it got his itch to fade and made his body feel bearable. But in reality, it was two very different things.

First was the money handed to him afterwards, two hundred dollars which was the lowest he would ever get because no one though the freak in a animal suit would win, but still more than he had ever had before.

The second was the more powerful of the two, and that was the loud and almost deafening cheers he was rewarded with.

The whole place was screaming when they saw him move, unique skills they had never seen as every other fighter were some kind of boxer or wrestler. Raph brought in more than ninjitsu but also Muay Thai and Ju-jitsu. It was enough to make them love him, insults spit at him with grins and teasing notes that showed they saw him as some kind of mad legend.

Raph quickly became addicted.

He went back there three or four times a week, fighting with cheers and bets thrown at him, people shouting out ‘Red Snapper!’ Over and over despite him not even being a snapper turtle. It had been coined when he bit a guy in his second fight, something totally accepted and that earns him a free beer.

He hated the taste of beer but fuck if it didn’t help with the bruises and wounds he’d get, so he took it every-time.

Red Snapper was as famous as some of the other fighters like ‘Rabid Randy’ and ‘Princess Knuckles’. All the names were stupid but he kind of liked that.

It lasted years, literally six! In fact even after they lost Splinter and he went more, his brothers didn’t figure it out. They knew he was fighting, but not about the money or the club, and seen as he pretty much always won until other mutants started to show up and he had more of a challenge, one thing he was good at was not getting too badly hurt.

Raph was grinning, arm lifted up as he shouted in victory as he just beat down a Cougar mutant in a fight that took six and half minutes and earns him a solid twenty thousand as it was the biggest fight of the month. He was standing tall and bloodied with the other mutant being taken to medical but six guys, looking around at the audience that loved him and his violence when he saw it.

He had leaned his head back, exhausted from the long fight as well as the two he had done before then, when he looked up at one of the many holes in the top floor.

There were three disappointed and almost heartbroken looking faces, one looking like he would cry, one like he was going to be sick at the sight of such depraved violence, one looking full of shame.

Mikey turned away first as soon as Raph caught his eye, tears falling so obvious even though he was so far away.

Donnie gagged, seemingly focused on the sight of the Cougar still holding onto his side from where Raph nearly gutted him with his nails. He ran away, probably following Mikey.

Leo… Leo just stared at him. He didn’t even shake his head like Splinter would have done, instead just staring at Raph like he was trying to figure out how someone could be such a shameful burden, a disappointment to him and everyone he knew.

Raph look down after Leo turned and left, staring at the screaming crowed and blood over his hands and the floor for the ring and for the first time since he found the club, he wished he was somewhere else.

[raphieeee]

AHHH THIS MADE ME SO HAPPY OMG

This is the most beautiful Raph X Casey fic I’ve ever seen, it’s heartbreaking and sweet and cheesy and I love it! It’s kind of a retelling if the show but with Raph and Casey becoming a couple along the way but be warned there are a lot of spoilers in it!!

If you like it please leave a Kudos because this author deserves it!!!!!

[raphieeee]

I genuinely believe that April in 2012 could have been an amazing character and her and Donnie could have been so cute together if she wasn’t written so poorly. In saying that….

I want Raph to get angry at her. I really want there to be a moment where April has just led Donnie on yet again, giving him another cheek kiss then just a day later telling him to leave her alone and going out on a totally not-a date with Casey. Raph is the only one who sees the tear brimming in his little brothers eyes and he’s had enough, no one hurts his brothers, especially not like that.

April has just left the lair and Raph follows her, waiting until she turns around to ask whose there to bring his Sai up to her throat while shoving her against the wall.

She protest, a brief look of fear in her eyes before she clearly gets annoyed, “Raph, what the hell are yo-“

“shut it. You’re going to listen to be because you only get one chance and I ain’t repeating myself. My brother is an idiot, he’s a mad genius but he’s still a person and he loves you. I don’t give a shit if you don’t love him back, you don’t have to, but if you play him one more time for whatever pathetic reason you have, wether it’s you want attention or your just a soulless freak, I will kill you. It won’t be quick, it won’t be painless, and they’ll never find you to give your dad solace. My brother deserve better than anything you could give him, so either accept him as he is, mutant and nerd and all, or back the fuck off. Got it?”

April is shaking by that point, a small cut already appearing on the front of her neck as well as a smaller one on the side where the smaller prong of his weapon digs in. She looks close to crying but she’s still a brave person and keeps it.

She nods rapidly.

Raph leaves, letting her slump to the floor while gasping for breath and he doesn’t look back. They ask what happened to her neck the next day and she says nothing, though Mikey notices her being tense around Raph who looks eerily calm.

Mikey says nothing about it.

[raphieeee]

TW: parental neglect

Raph runs away.

It was when he and his brothers just turned fourteen and he had a big, big argument with his father. It started as it always did, Raph had woken up too late and got in trouble for not being at training on time, which meant he didn’t have a chance to eat, which meant he didn’t have a chance to feed Spike which stressed him out, so he was on edge. All it took after that was his father asking him to clean up after Mikey spilt something and Raph immediately protested, hating how unfair it was and how his little brother said nothing in his defence and just giggled.

Raph was never really angry at his brothers, frustrated and scared for them sure, but never angry. His father though? Raph was always angry at him.

Since the beginning of their training Splinter had pointed out how Raph was over emotional and prone to outburst and took it upon himself to make sure Raph was able to combat this and ‘be better’.

This meant praise was few and far between because Raph never learned to control his anger with things like Katas and punishments like no TV or extra training, the latter he actually enjoyed. Instead most praise was given to his brothers, who were already doing better at Raph in all the traits of a Ninja outside of strength and combat skis, but comapred to Raph’s inability to mediate and stay calm, his aggression and lust for winning, they practically glowed. It was so easy to compliment his brothers work when a bad example was right there next to them and unfortunately, Splinters desire for his son to be better than his brother of the past made it so he didn’t stop there.

Raph’s room was always scrutinised, his attachment to his toys and comics was criticised despite all his brothers being the same, his lack of manners was eating pointed out every night despite the fact that he was usually the only one to eat at the shitty little table int he kitchen.

It was no surprise that he ran. He had left letters to each of his brothers telling them he was running away but will always text them every night so they knew he was okay.

He hated not saying it in person and ignored their hundreds of text for the first day, messaging that he was okay at sunrise.

From there he was actually alright, he found a simple disguise, cut up a back back to out over his shell so it looked like he just had a full pack. He stole money, some food, but then found an old apartment that was empty that he could live in. He was close to the middle of the city, not close enough to his old home that he could be found, or far enough away to where he knew they would assume he would go. He got a job at his young age of fourteen purely cause his mutation made him look built like a grown teenager, and working in a garbage sorting place wasn’t that bad when you knew some of worst smells of mankind. No one asked about his preference to be concealed when he explained he had a deformity and the one guy who tried it warned others against it once his arm healed.

He started crime fighting after a week, saving lives and protecting innocents while still snagging a couple bucks from ATMs.

He started knitting, finding big needles and thick wool to work with. He sold some of his makes online, big fluffy blankets and pillow cases. He got a cat, googled how to care for them and got it vaccinated and cared for. Her name was Silk, reminding him bitterly of how he had left Spike behind in his rage to leave.

And every night he messaged his brothers, told them what he was doing. Eventually they stoped asking him to come home and instead asked about his cat who he’d sent a photo of. They talked about it, realised in their phone call how much happier Raphael sounded and relented. They called often, Donnie helping boost his online shop after he found out about it and ordering custom blankets in their four colours.

When the three decided to go out a fight crime, Raph became their guide. He didn’t lead, nor did he want to now that he realised how much he enjoyed helping people, but he navigated often and at times was able to call shots if Leo was in a good mood.

When his brothers got upset, they’d come stay with him. He didn’t like hearing about Splinter, but he could tell by the way the others talked about him that his father was living in regret and wanted to try fox their relationship, but Raph wasn’t ready for that.

At least, not at first. It’s when he turns eighteen and his best mate Casey tells him his own father was once like that but became better when Casey run away with his little sister for a week.

He’s not ready to forgive his father for his neglect and favouritism, not by a lot shot, yet he feels stronger in his mind and maybe, just maybe, his father is able to do it right he second time.

[raphieeee]

I need a R18 tmnt so bad where it’s just pure violence and brutal ninja work against a warlord and like super horrific mutation scenes

(No sexual stuff though)

[raphieeee]

CW: talking about scars and trauma, burns, Pyrophobia (I think that’s what it’s called…?)

For as long as any of them knew him, Casey Jones always wore big and baggy clothing. Not one of his paint stained hoodies ever went past his wrist or were rolled up, nor were his tacky denims jeans ever left with rips as he always stitched them together with messy black cotton.

None of them thought anything of this, even when they all realised at various moments. It was just one of the many things that made Casey Jones so, well… Casey Jones.

But then the tar incident happened.

It was a simple mission, stop some purple dragons from messing around at a construction site that they were using as a cover for their latest batch of weapons. Leo was even relaxed enough to make a few genuine jokes, something that always made them feel safe even if it had the side effect of a little cringing.

Casey and Mikey had been chasing after these two goons who had been caught with their pants literally down and were fumbling over the place. One of them knocked over a heated container that had tar in it, which ended up getting on Casey’s arm but thankfully he had enough layers to be safe.

Instinct still took over when the threat of burns settled into his mind and he ripped his hoodie of as the heat started to get to his skin, flailing a bit as the sleeve caught slightly on his shirt and he ended up ripping that off two in his panic.

He was cursing up a storm about loosing his second favourite hoodie, trying to focus on that and not the feel of heat, when he realised that Mikey was staring at him with a slack jaw and wide eyes that were quickly gathering tears. Confused, Casey had walked over to him before stopping suddenly as realisation settled in. Right as it did, Mikey’s lip started to wobble as he held back tears.

Casey couldn’t stop the growing panic attack even if he was at home alone with his favourite show and a dozen teddies around him and four air coolers on max.

Mikey had seen it, and he one thing he wanted to hide for all eternity.

Across the left side of his body, from his thigh up to his back and over both shoulders, were his burns. The skin was marred and twisted, both looking thin and so tough as it’s shaped wobbled and twisted, some pale while others seemed stuck on a pink like hue. His left side was the most visible to Mikey, and was also the worst, as it was where the skin of his armpit struggled to keep its flexibility and shape as scar tissue took over it. It was where you could see that he he fire touched his arm and dripped down and down, the source of over ten years of pain, physical and mental.

Casey sobbed as he tried and failed to cover himself, almost screaming when Mikey stopped him from putting the still tar covered hoodie on. Casey only allowed him to as he realised that the threat of more heat was bad enough.

It could have been minutes or hours, most likely mere seconds, but soon the others were rushing around the corner at the sound of the commotion.

Casey would forever be grateful to his leader for his quick thinking. While the others stared in shock, Leo ripped off part of a tarp and wrapped it over his body, careful to not actually put pressure on his body.

Him and Raph took Casey home, both of them letting him sob and whine like a child as memories and sensations took for this mind all while the feeling of being stuck in a pedestal with a hundred lights and millions of eyes watched him and whom sick.

Raph cleaned up the vomit, Leo ran a cold bath.

Casey Jones felt like his world was falling apart yet at the same time he felt a relief like no other when his best friend and his most trusted teacher didn’t bat a single eye. They stayed by him as he sobbed and even as his skin was visible.

Casey was scared, but he was also safe. Safe from fire, safe from tar, safe from judgement.

Safe with his ninja turtles.

[raphieeee]

[raphieeee]

“Leo, I feel sick.”

To Donnie and Mikey it’s obviously an excuse to not listen to Leo’s rants and rambles about proper strategy and team coordination. They both find it annoying but more so when Leo falls for it every single time. Raph isn’t honest with how he feels pretty much ever, even when he says he’s angry he’s shally feeling something else, so clearly Leo isn’t going to ignore it when he does actually talk. It’s kind of manipulative in the others eyes, but they’ve all had moments where they’ve wanted to just be left to rest (and doted on by Mama Hen Leo). So, they never say anything, they just roll their eyes and watch as Leo pushes Raph out of the dojo or lab or wherever to god knows where.

It doesn’t happen often, maybe once or twice a year, so who really cares?

Leo knows that it’s an excuse, just not to get out of something he doesn’t want to do. He knows it’s his little brothers way of asking for help without bringing attention to himself. Raph will say he feels sick and Leo will take him to either of their rooms and just let his brother be. Wether that’s upset, scared, tired, frustrated or anything. Every single time Raph will cry, sometimes only a little bit and other times he will sob for hours on end. Leo will brush his shell and tell him it’s okay, not asking any questions and just letting his baby brother tell him about his nightmares and worries.

Raph doesn’t like talking about it afterwards, but he accepts that Leo will want to check in on him. So, he lets his brother ask him if he still feels sick or if he wants another day away from training and know that his answer will really mean how stable he feels he is.

Neither of them can honestly remember when it started. Raph hates being open, it’s too vulnerable and his brother shouldn’t have to deal with it when he has his own stuff as well as everyone else, but sometimes he just needs Leo. He needs his big brother, his leader and his best friend. And sometimes…

“Raph, I feel sick.”

[raphieeee]

《Stress》

Based on my headcanon on how the turtles would react to stress because IM A FUCKING SUCKER FOR THIS KINDA COMFORT COMICS OKAY!!! SUE ME!!!

To recap the stress response headcanon briefly:

Donnie stress stims (scratching his arm, they give him fidget toys so he doesnt hurt himself)

Mikey hides in his shell, away from harm. You know, turtle istincts and all haha

Leo gets nausea and gags a lot (any strong emotion does that really)

Raph has a delayed panic/anxiety spike later on, because he wants to always make sure his brothers are safe first. THEN he'll crumble

[raphieeee]

Need more Raph and Tyler like from the 2003 one because my baby was made to be a PAPA TURTLE

[raphieeee]

How I think rise and 2012 would get along:

- Rise!Raph would defiantly be so defensive of 2012!Mikey, always making people apologise for being mean to him and giving him an actual chance to speak

- BUT! He would also be willing to try explain to the others where their faults are with the help of Dr Feelings

- Rise!Leo would be OBSESSED annoying the hell out of 2012!Raph, teasing yet also he would help build up his confidence? I feel like he could recognise Raph’s insecurity

- I think rise!donnie would like 2012!Loe ya first because he’s more serious and quiet but then end up missing his twins noise too much

- alternatively, I think he would also be the second (mikey being first) to realise that 2012!Leo is just putting up a front and is just as silly and goofy as his brothers

- 2012!Donnie would feel so small compared to his counter part, and Rise!Donnie wouldn’t pick up that his excited rambling on his ache im eyes was making the other upset, until Rise!Leo explains it in a kind way to BOTH of them

- cue Rise!Donnie explains to 2012!Donnie that he’s so confident because he knows his brothers trust him and that, being totally serious, if he has the power to create a fully working robot from scrap, he can do literally anything. (After a while he also explains that he too feels small, but when compared to the mighty power of magic)

- Rise!Mikey is going insane, they’re all so emotionally constipated and he’s getting a migraine from switching between Dr Delicate Touch and Dr Feelings

- Rise!April is so worried for her country part “are you eating enough?” “Can you really fight with just a fan?” “You dad WHAT?!”

- 2012!April feels like she just gained a big sister, even if she rather politely tells her not to speak about her crush on Donnie

- 2012!Raph shyly coming up to Rise!Raph after him and 2012!Mikey show each other their teddy collection, finally having the courage to join his little brother

- if it’s medic!rise!leo then he 100% pesters 2012!donnie about being more careful about overworking himself and managing his stress after his own Donnie got sick from it and had to be in bed rest for almost a whole month

- I love the whole rise!Raph helping 2012!leo with leadership but the main thing I see happening is him explaining the difference between leading a team and guiding a family.

- I also see rise!Raph helping 2012!splinter understand that he’s allowed to grieve the life his lost, not just his love, but also everything that came with being human. I think he learnt that that was what caused his own fathers shortcomings at the start and wants to help the other before it’s too late by helping him know that he’s allowed to want things to be different and that it doesn’t make him a bad father.

- 2012!mikey getting embarrassed about how bad his cooking is, genuinely ashamed when he sees how his counter part is, but rise!mikey loved a challenge and is determined to help him learn!

- 12!leo: “hey where did you get *super rare science thing*?” Rise!Donnie: “Oh I took it from the Foot Clan.” 12!turtles: “YOU WHAT?!”

-

I’ll add more as I think of them!

[raphieeee]

No one talks enough about how traumatic it must have been for Raph when Mona betrayed them. Not only did the first person he fell in love with betray him, she also sacrificed his family. Not only that, but it ended up being for nothing as her and her Commander were lied to anyway and their planet wasn’t safe. And to add to that? On a planet filled with Raph’s biggest fear, insects.

[raphieeee]

NO TCEST NAH UH STAY AWAY NO THANK YOU

I wrote this a while ago but I edited it so it’s a lot better now!

Please read the tags first because there’s a lot of heavy topics in this!

Summary:

Raphael is different to his brothers, that has always been obvious. He is shorter, wider, more emotional and more protective than any of them. Never have they paid mind to this, but as Raph turns sixteen he starts to get sick and sore all over. having no doctors or even a vet, they must figure out what is going on by themselves. Splinter realises the cause and must have a discussion with his son he never thought he would ever need to have.

Or

Raphael is actually a female turtle and can reproduce asexually

[raphieeee]

Trans Casey who chose his/her name after Cassandra Jones, his/her mother whose either dead, absent or whatever!

[raphieeee]

Still wondering if we were ever gonna get a Utrom in Rise!tmnt and what it would be like cause, you know, trauma.