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Ineffa is a robot maid.

Alright, stop. You've gone too far.

In case you didn't know, this character will be Genshin Impact's new 5-Star in version 5.8 about five and a half weeks from now, and she supposedly hails from Nod-Krai, a sub-region of Snezhnaya. Where do I even begin with this?

Well, like I said, she's a robot maid. Literally. Her outfit description says she's "a young lady's housekeeping robot." While I appreciate the opportunity to use the Peter Griffin housekeeping meme, this character design is just too "out there." It's not that I'm opposed to Genshin Impact having a robot character; I think that's something that could be worth exploring. It's more the way that she's presented.

Her design is way too space-age and she looks more like a superhero than, well... a Genshin Impact character. That's really the only problem with her design. She's also meant to be our introduction to Lunar reactions, which are essentially variants of the currently existing reactions with different properties. That also ostensibly means she's connected with the Moon Goddess in some way, or at least uses the Moon Goddess' power. Really not what I was expecting from a "forgotten" goddess in Genshin lore.

Added to that, she's almost the exact same character as Poppi from Xenoblade Chronicles 2. She's even got the same hair color for shit's sake. They're practically identical in concept.

This design must be a nightmare for anyone who wasn't feeling Natlan's character designs, which I happily defended. This is just stupid. I kid, of course, as I mean no offense to anyone who likes Ineffa's design. But I also want to say, "what the fuck, HoYo?" When I talked about Varesa, I said that Snezhnaya needed to be a return to form for Genshin Impact. It does not bode well that our first real exposure to the region looks like this.

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Let's talk about Skirk (and Escoffier).

As some of you may know, Skirk is fast-approaching as a playable character in Genshin Impact. She has not been drip-marketed yet, as for whatever reason HoYo has been very slow about that for a while now. But as always, there are leaks.

And it's those leaks that I want to talk about, because I have growing concerns with the way Genshin Impact's balance is headed. Skirk looks like she's going to be very strong, but that strength is somewhat dependent on another character that was recently released. That being Escoffier, of course.

The general consensus among theorycrafters is that Escoffier is perhaps the most unbalanced character that's ever been released, aside from maybe Bennett. Mavuika and Neuvillette are baby shit compared to her. And looking at the leaks for Skirk, it's abundantly clear that Escoffier was made to support her.

This results in Escoffier being the de facto best support for Skirk, and an essential part of her best teams. No other Cryo support comes even remotely close to what Escoffier provides. And this seems to be HoYo's new money-making strategy: instead of releasing dedicated 4-Star supports for new DPS characters, make them 5-Stars instead.

Skirk is probably going to be very popular, so they're cashing in on that by pushing people to build a super premium team for her. I don't know how strong the Skirk/Escoffier/Yelan/Furina team will be exactly, but if it's stronger than Mavuika teams (which isn't out of the question), the game balance is looking pretty fucked. Coupled with the fact that the Abyssal Spire has been getting a lot more difficult lately and you can probably see why I'm so concerned about this.

The barrier to entry for newer players to start participating in Genshin's endgame is higher than it's ever been, and I fear it will become higher still. In some ways I think Escoffier is a good thing for the game, because her sheer power can wheelchair some older Cryo and Hydro characters that are less competitive. It's Skirk's synergy with and semi-reliance on her that bothers me.

I've secured my ability to run Skirk's strongest team thanks to a 50/50 win on Escoffier, but other players might not be so lucky or have the same amount of resources. It's especially difficult for aspiring Skirk mains, who've been saving for their favorite character and might not have enough to justify getting what it takes to make her the best.

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Well I got her.

Wasn't expecting it to actually happen, I just kinda lucked out. Best part is, I still have Xilonen funds since I started at a 29 pity counter and only had to sink in 50 wishes to get Varesa.

And, to my surprise, they didn't go the route I expected them to with her characterization. Her animations and visual style are a lot more palatable now since they're not paired with "uguuu clumsy, embarrassment," and she doesn't have a comedic personality shift when she goes ham in battle. Ironically, making her a not-so-hammy character. Makes me like her more.

Also can I just...

Oh my.

Yeah, I think I'll just leave it there.

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I have achieved the impossible

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Varesa drip marketing finally

And now that it's been posted (not Iansan yet though, things are evidently quite disorganized over there at HoYo HQ), I'm actually gonna take a moment to defend her design a little bit here.

Varesa has rightly been criticized for just being a fat joke, essentially. Because fat peoples' only defining character trait is a love of food, right? Not to mention, it's laughable to even say Varesa is chubby, even more so to say she's fat. Some have pointed out that her physique is only achievable through bulking and a metric tonne of squats, but... that's literally what she's doing?

The people of the Collective of Plenty, according to HoYoverse, are known for their fitness. Varesa's kicks are said to be monstrously powerful, and she was personally trained by Iansan, so... yeah. Her legs strong as hell.

Adding to that, the assertion that she's supposed to be chubby is more something assumed by the community rather than something directly stated by HoYo. So, surprisingly enough, her physique actually makes sense and has some justification behind it.

The whole "UwU so clumsy" girlypop with butt stuff attached is still stupid and going too far, if you ask me. But I guess I'm feeling a little more positive about Varesa's characterization, now that we have more to go on than just visuals. It was also a little unfair of me to point out how cool Mualani is when the reason I think she's cool has to do with her role in the story. If you just went by her visuals, you would assume she was just as goofy as Varesa, though still considerably less absurd.

Not saying I have faith that HoYo will exceed my expectations as they did with Mualani. Just that I'm more willing to give Varesa a chance now. Instead of being 100% meme, I'm guessing about... 80%.

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Varesa and Genshin Impact's Identity Crisis

I'd heard things about Varesa's animations, but now that I've seen the leaks myself, it's even more ridiculous than I could have imagined.

Look, I have a pretty high tolerance for this kind of thing. My attitude towards sex and sexuality is more liberal than most. I think censorship is bullshit and I hate how much Puritanism is ingrained in our culture, especially American culture. But even I think HoYo might have gone too far with this one.

I say that somewhat jokingly, because I still like Varesa a lot in spite of what I've seen. It's just that I'm finally starting to feel the complete tonal whiplash of Genshin Impact over the past year. How did we go from characters like Navia, Furina, Arlecchino, and Chiori to... a girl in a crop top and miniskirt clumsily running about, smashing enemies with her ass?

I'd just like to point out as well that this is what Iansan meant when she said the situation at the Collective of Plenty was under control during the Abyss invasion... dear god.

The most charitable way you could interpret Varesa is as a "crouching moron, hidden badass" type of character; someone who deliberately acts stupid and clumsy but is actually really strong. That's not all bad. But previous characters were mostly cool and badass with silly/cute quirks here and there, or they had really interesting/compelling stories that got you to empathize with them and like them even more. Even Mualani is a really cool person in spite of how goofy she can be. She's a combat veteran and an "older sister" to a lot of people, with a bit of a mischievous streak.

Varesa on the other hand is 100% meme. There's always a chance that could change with the Tribal Chronicle or if she has a role in an upcoming Archon Quest. But in this case I'm not at all confident that will happen. She seems very much like a one-off gag character designed to sell exclusively on sex appeal. She's not just gooner bait, she's straight up coomer bait.

Natlan now very much seems like it's being used as an excuse for HoYoverse to try out a bunch of experimental character designs that didn't fit anywhere else, which I don't explicitly hate, but it's clear that they're pushing the boat out as far as they can with Varesa here. It kinda feels like they just wanted to design characters that don't fit in with Genshin's usual style, but still with Genshin gameplay.

As long as this kind of thing stays in Natlan, it's probably fine in the long run. Snezhnaya needs to be a return to form, though, because Genshin sometimes doesn't feel like Genshin anymore when it comes to Natlan. Especially since we've been building up to it for nearly five years. If the conclusion to the Fatui arc and the reveal of why the Tsaritsa needs the seven Gnoses is anything short of spectacular, this game is cooked.

I'm still probably going for Varesa, because honestly she looks fun as hell and like I said, I have a high tolerance for this kind of thing. I still think it's super funny how blatant they were with this character, it just feels like she belongs in a Senran Kagura game or some shit. And to HoYo's credit, they did make her considerably bigger than other characters of her model type, although her hip-to-waist ratio is still outrageous.

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Varesa is a character that exists

And oh boy, is she making waves already. For pretty obvious reasons.

In the words of a friend, "What in the fresh fucking vtuber model goonerbait tho?"

Apparently she's a... wrestler? Can't say for sure since HoYo seems incapable of marketing drip on time these days, but it's in her leaked ability descriptions. Seems consistent with how she's presented, at least... well, kinda. She's not exactly what comes to mind when I think "wrestler," but the joke is obviously that she likes to eat (she's eating a goddamn taco in her official artwork for shit's sake) which makes her chubby and therefore good at wrestling. And I mean... sure. She's got the thighs, but she doesn't have the belly fat. Not that I expect HoYoverse to properly model heavier ladies or design them in the first place; this is a gacha game after all, and they're cowards.

That being said, I do like her design. She may be the most obvious gooner bait this side of Booba Sword, but sometimes that's okay. Also... might just be me, but is she in trans flag colors? The "light blue" in her design is really more of an aqua, but... maybe HoYoverse is trying to tell us something here. They'd never say it outright because again: they're cowards, but the color choice is so close that it might just be intentional with plausible deniability. Either way, I'm going to headcanon that Varesa is trans. She is absolutely primed to spark gender envy in any case.

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So Hu Tao is getting a new outfit and of course it's fucking god-tier

Just Hu Tao things

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I have no idea what I'm doing.

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From what I've been able to gather, Mualani uses a Catalyst, which means that HoYo has once again failed to put a frickin' Hydro Claymore in the game.

She has a signature weapon, so obviously 5-Star rarity if you couldn't already tell by her design. It boosts her HP and Normal Attack DMG, but the damage bonus decreases with every attack, unless that attack Vaporizes. If it does, the damage bonus increases instead, up to a set amount.

So even without knowing any of the details of her kit, we know she's meant to be an on-field Hydro vape DPS. That's something kinda new. How well this will actually work in practice remains to be seen, as it’s a lot easier to vaporize Pyro hits than Hydro ones. But maybe HoYoverse plans to change that by giving us a Pyro Xingqiu or something similar.

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Mualani, Kinich, and Kachina

Well now. I don't think any of us were prepared for Genshin Impact's latest round of drip marketing. This is the first time I find myself interested in all three of the revealed characters.

First up is Mualani, and uh... What can I say? She's hot. Hoping for her to finally be the Hydro Claymore we've been waiting so long for, but I guess we'll find out soon enough. Chances are there are leaks to look at already.

Kinich looks like one badass dude. Love his style. The pixel theme is an... interesting choice. It seems like Natlan characters follow an aesthetic that's pretty different from what we're used to, much like the layout of the drip marketing itself. Almost looks like they're from a completely different game.

Finally, there's Kachina. I'm excited for this one just because she's another Geo character, which is something we need more of. We especially need more/better construct users, given how unreliable Geo constructs tend to be. It would be really cringe if HoYo never released another construct user, especially after they released a character who benefits from the use of constructs just a few updates ago.

Anyway, the one I'm most interested in is definitely Mualani (yes, I am a simp). But these are all fantastic character designs, and I'd say HoYoverse has really outdone themselves here.

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Emilie

Pretty wild character design. Nice to see something with some spice, something flashy, after the blandness that is Clorinde. Let's hope she's got a personality to match.

What sticks out the most to me here are her glasses. Genshin has surprisingly few bespectacled playable characters. In fact, as of right now, Sucrose, Baizhu, and Xianyun are the only ones (Dori doesn't really count, Charlotte only half counts). I think because of that, I find Emilie's design to be quite appealing.

It's also one of those ridiculously intricate designs that I assume would take you an hour to get dressed in every morning. But I prefer to suspend my disbelief and revel in the absurdity of it.

The weapon she uses is anyone's guess. My first thought was that she could be Claymore, but that's probably just because she's somewhat similar to Navia. Most likely, I think, is that she's a Catalyst user. Makes sense with the perfume aspect, no?

Though she doesn't hit me the same as Chiori, I am interested in Emilie. We'll see if she impresses. I'm planning to finally get Alhaitham this next patch, but if I lose the 50/50 on him, I'll most likely go for Emilie.

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The Chiori Wishing Saga

It's time.

31,022 Primogems. 1,860 Genesis Crystals. 41 Masterless Starglitter. And 42 Intertwined Fates. All combined: 255 wishes for Chiori. Current pity counter is 5. Let's do this.

Just for fun: I'm playing a wishing game as well. I roll two d10, and if the result is 94 or higher, I make a batch of 10 wishes. If not, I only wish once. Why? Well, hypothetically the odds of getting a 5-Star in any given 10 pulls is 6%.

Alright, first Chiori at 23 pity. Rolled a 95 and instantly got her. Off to a great start here, maybe I'm onto something with my dice shenanigans.

Weapon banner: Uraku Misugiri at 16 pity. Easy game, wow.

Second Chiori at 58 pity. Oh, we're eating good.

74 pity: Jean'd. C9, by the way. Unfortunate, but this means I now have C2 Chiori guaranteed with just my freemogems. Speaking of which, I got her at 77 pity. 51 Intertwined Fates left at this point.

Ran out of free wishes, so now I'm buying my remaining double top-ups to restock. Unfortunately I get Mona'd at 78, then it takes me until 75 pity to get Chiori again. Pretty average RNG so far, except for the first few wishes, which were quite lucky.

83 to get Tignari'd, oof. Not winning a lot of 50/50s here, which is unfortunately the key to saving money, since you can rarely expect it to take fewer than 75 to 80 wishes to get a 5-Star. Well, I still have plenty of spare cash, so I'll keep on keeping on. It takes me 82 more wishes to get to C4, so even my soft pity luck is looking pretty rough right now.

C5 Chiori at 76! That's more like it. Coming into the final stretch here. Just one more 50/50 to pass and we're golden... except I get Diluc'd at 46 pity. Y'know what, I'll take that. At least it wasn't 80+ again.

So, in the end I get C6 Chiori in 80 more wishes, having made 768 total. A bit worse than average, but better than expected; the statistical average is 650 wishes for a C6 5-Star. But for a small sample size like mine, that's fairly unlikely. You'd actually expect a lot more in that case. All things considered, wishing for C6 Chiori and her weapon went very well, especially early on.

I am never doing this again though, lol. Chiori is the sole character to break the mold here. Of course, it's always possible that HoYo manages to create a character who appeals even more to me than Chiori, but I'm going to be much more hesitant to pull for them for a lot of reasons.

Now, I'm going to live life to the fullest with my Geo goddess. It's been fun writing about Chiori a whole bunch, but I need some time to relax and focus on other things.

Like Arlecchino. Just kidding, Arlecchino is mid.

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T-minus one week until Genshin Impact Version 4.5, and Chiori's Event Wish.

It's been quite the agonizing wait this time around as I'm obviously really excited for this character. Not to mention I've been putting in an obscene amount of effort to get my funds up in preparation for her arrival.

I've got about 27,000 Primogems ready to go, and I'll probably get up to around 30,000 by the time of the update. Way more than I thought I was going to get, plus I've got some spare starglitter, Genesis Crystals, and more than 40 Intertwined Fates. All things considered I have the ability to make 240-250 wishes.

But I want C6. Which means I'll still have to spend an exorbitant amount of money most likely. Or do nothing but save for Chiori while I wait for her inevitable rerun.

Either way, C6 Chiori is something I'm committed to getting. R5... less so. Any refinement on Chiori's weapon is complete overkill at that point, but I suppose I'll consider it. Actually, if I wait long enough it'll eventually be on that new Chronicled Wish, which will make refining the weapon a lot easier. That seems to be the smartest way of going about it, since I doubt my enjoyment will be significantly affected by not having that extra 15% damage.

I'm curious how Chiori will be received by the playerbase as a whole once she's officially in the game, and how successful her Event Wish will be. She's not beating the sales of powerhouse characters like Kazuha, but I wonder how positive community perception of her will be in the end. She might just catch us off guard.

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At last, we have info on Chiori's final beta update. Or, lack of an update, rather, because there were no changes lol

(Beta was delayed from Monday for unknown reasons)

This is good though. I think Chiori is fine where she's at right now, which might sound strange if you read my last post. Truth is, I've changed my mind about a couple things after engaging in a bit of theorycrafting. And the math is quite interesting...

I believe I've mentioned before that Chiori's damage output is quite high, or implied it at least. But how high, exactly? Well, if you pair her with Zhongli, you're looking at upwards of 400,000 damage per rotation, or about 20,000 DPS if you're using a 20s rotation. And that's just a conservative estimate. My personal build for Chiori gets about 527k DPR.

Because of this, I don't think Chiori is locked to mono Geo as much as people think she is. Yes, mono Geo is still her best team, but it's far from the only good one. If you like Chiori, you can use her in a double Geo core and still have a good team.

I think people are far too hung up on what the absolute best team is for every character. Which is essentially like asking Chiori to be Furina, or Nahida, and I don't think I have to tell you that's a bit unreasonable. Not every character is going to be an upgrade in a bunch of different teams, and not every character has to be.

So yeah, go nuts. If you don't want to use Chiori in mono Geo, you don't have to. Force her in whatever team you want. After all, isn't that what you should do, if you call yourself a Chiori main?

As a side note, I also calculated C6 Chiori, and she solos the entire game. No, that's not a joke. She cranks out about 70k DPS on my build, which is more than enough to crush even the hardest endgame content. That's solo Chiori. No teammates, no second doll, and she still does that much.

Now all that's left is to wait until she's finally in the game, with newfound confidence that she will demolish everything.

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Have another post from this Chiori-obsessed blog:

I've been looking into some of the criticisms people have of this character, since I'd been hearing things and I wanted to know if those concerns were really valid. Long story short: they are.

People are understandably upset about the nerfs she's been receiving. It's pretty frustrating when we get characters like Neuvillette who are insane monsters, but then the devs turn around and relentlessly scrutinize and tweak others, like Chiori.

Chiori was nowhere near as strong as Neuvillette is currently and she's seemingly getting hit with nerf after nerf. It really makes you wonder if HoYo is even trying to balance the game, or if they're just playing favorites. Which, needless to say, would be incredibly unfair. Or maybe they really are just that stupid and have no idea what they're doing. Hard to say.

Anyway, this is not a doompost; rather, it's an attempt at a rational analysis of what Chiori's shortcomings are and what they mean for her success as a unit. As I said, I find most criticisms of her kit to be valid, but that doesn't mean Chiori is weak. Far from it.

The general consensus is that Chiori is a stronger version of Albedo. She has pretty much the exact same role, but she deals more damage than Albedo does, and doesn't have to deal with the cringe of her primary source of damage being killed by bosses all the time. In this sense, Chiori is a perfectly good unit who has a place in the meta.

The primary complaint isn't Chiori's power level, it's her lack of flexibility and the fact that she's essentially a rehash of an existing character. People dislike that Albedo is being powercrept, and that Chiori wasn't given a more unique design that doesn't limit her to mono Geo teams. That's all very understandable.

Now for the actual nerfs: removal of DEF snapshotting for Chiori's dolls, and of course the decrease in the burst multiplier. Plus the changes made to her Constellation in earlier beta versions. Personally I don't think these nerfs change much, although removing Chiori's ability to snapshot was cringe and the burst damage nerf seems unwarranted. 30% reduction in damage dealt is a bit much if all they wanted to do was reduce her Energy needs and make C2 better.

HoYo going out of their way to nerf the output of Chiori, when her only real strength is being able to deal a lot of damage, feels a bit like a slap in the face. Especially when they're doing that instead of addressing some of Chiori's key issues, like the lack of AoE on her dolls' attacks, or the fact that she can't reposition them because of her skill's relatively long cooldown. Not to mention, once again, her team restrictions.

What this all means is that Chiori is not a particularly good pull if you're looking to add value to your account or just trying to 36-star the Abyssal Spire for the first time. She can be pretty strong for new players, due to her raw damage that will help you breeze through early-game content, but for the average invested F2P, she's not great.

But also: if you're willing to do what it takes to make her good, Chiori will be good. It's a matter of playing her in the right team and giving her enough investment to put in work for you. If, like me, you're undeterred by Chiori's blandness and limitations, don't worry about all the doomposting. You'll be able to make her work, she's not a bad character by any means.

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Sometimes you just have to take justice into your own hands (Comm for my friend Neffi!)