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why does he always have to look so fucking pretty though

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Honestly think this has to be the greatest tribute fanedit I've seen in my life. If this doesn't make any OFMD crewmember happy cry and jump up and down with joy, I don't know what will. Massive props to the mindblowingly talented editor of this beaut.

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Reuploading this drawing on this blog because these pirates are very dear to me and I want them here

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I know the joke about Izzy is “human dropped into a muppets movie” but the tragedy is that he’s a queer-coded character from some 1940s or 50s popcorn flick dropped into a pride parade in a floating gayborhood & he flat out has no idea how to deal with it. We learn he’s a great swordsman in the most homoerotic way possible when he uses his skills to cut open a man’s shirt. We see him react more openly and with less inner conflict when Ed slaps him on the back and says “I need you here” than when Ed implies to him, a minute earlier, that he could be a captain. When he’s part of an overtly queer scene where other characters get the romance & he just gets the subtext, Con O'Neill’s body language stands out even more—go back to the scene where Izzy tells Stede that Ed adores him, the way he strokes his fingers down the curtain dividing him from Stede. There is literally no straight explanation for this choice, but there is also no explicit acknowledgement that the character is queer; in a different, older show or movie, that body language would be the acknowledgment. He imbues the character with the looks and pauses that you would see in, like, Ben-Hur or something, where everyone knew a character was gay but nobody could say it out loud. Keep in mind that in the comedies where these characters would exist, the subtextually gay man would sometimes be best friends with a Strong Leading Man who got the girl in the end.

We hear him say outright that there’s no retirement for people like Izzy & Ed, only death, which is itself a hugely loaded analogy next to the title statement “our flag means death” when you consider our history & our use of flags throughout. And Izzy’s so focused on pure survival that he ends up nasty, manipulative, violent—the only way men like him can survive in his mind, or in the genre he’s from, if they don’t have a Strong Leading Man best friend like, say, a Blackbeard to protect him from the narrative. When Ed starts to live in Stede’s world, Izzy is both losing his subtextual boyfriend and also acting as though Ed’s going to get himself (and Izzy) killed if he keeps going down this path.

I will never be sane over this. Izzy is a Celluloid Closet case study who’s been dropped into a Logo TV original, and so much of the conflict of his character comes from his trying to use the coping techniques from that world (including techniques used by queer coded villains! He’s not healthy!) in a world where these techniques are actively harmful rather than a way to survive.

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The thing I am fucking feral about today: this shit.

Look. Look at this.

Stede, by and large, is not a Toucher. (That’s a whole separate essay.) He’s hesitant as fuck about it, and tends to initiate contact, if at all, through some intermediary: clothing, air, etc. Later, with Ed, he’ll do incidental touches, little things that could be explained away like the brush of arms together, etc.

(THIS IS NOT THAT ESSAY.)

But look at this shit. “May I?” Stede asks, and he gives it a moment but Ed doesn’t actually hand it over. He doesn’t even answer.

And Stede just reaches out, takes an end of the silk, and

slowly

drags it

through Ed’s fingers as Ed fucking tilts his eyes upwards in complete silence, his gaze clicking from spot to spot as his heart gets unwound from his lax – but not relaxed – grip.

And while I like the meta where Stede has NO FUCKING CLUE ABOUT HOW SEDUCTIVE HE’S BEING, I also like the idea that for the first time in his life, because this is a Queer Situation, Stede has the glimmerings of Game. Because, my god, the forwardness of it. He didn’t wait for Ed to give it to him. He just reached out and took, but in such a syrup-slow manner that Ed could’ve said no, could’ve just tightened his fingers if he didn’t want to let Stede take this precious thing– and Stede’s giving him that time while simultaneously also making some pretty great allusions, intentional or not, to how exactly he’d make his move, if a move he ever made.

Like, “May I?“ Stede would ask, and Ed (Blackbeard) wouldn’t move, wouldn’t say a word, but he wouldn’t step away either, would just watch Stede with a clicking gaze as Stede stepped forward, raised his hands, and drew Ed syrup-slow toward him, every moment one where Ed could turn away and every moment clear that Stede was here, wanting this, wanting him, and deliberate in his want.

So my god, the pure queer seduction of this scene: the intermediary object as a stand-in for themselves; the plausible deniability; the silent consent (a subgenre of plausible deniability); coded language; “innocent” touch as protective camouflage…

(It’s a little distressing to consider how much queer romantic context comes from trying to be both Open to a possibility while simultaneously trying not to get the shit beaten out of us for being wrong. It’s a powerful language. It’s a tragic one. It’s what makes it feel so special if it goes right.)

Anyway. Stede may have no idea the levels he’s playing at here, but he’s a man who was explicitly and in canon abused for displaying a particular flavor of non-masculine behavior. Even if he doesn’t know he’s queer, he knows the need for the language of safety; he’s been learning it since childhood. So he speaks it– and Ed, who engages in at least “when at sea” levels of queer living, picks up on it like the Stede-radio he’s been tuning for ages now to find a signal that explains him has suddenly gone from static to the crystal-clear notes of Gnossienne No. 5.

Is it any wonder that Ed’s oh no moment is fucking palpable here? Is it any wonder that Stede comes away from this scene a little more certain of himself around Ed, able to argue him into staying, pull him into a treasure hunt, touch his bare arm against Ed’s when they become co-captains?

GAH these fuckheads, look at them.

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feeling so completely and utterly normal about this 👍

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You’d save me a seat, wouldn’t you?

You’re cordially invited to dine at Blackbeard’s Bar & Grill & Other Delicacies & Delights… and Fishing Equipment.

Try our renowned specialty dishes such as:

The Sailor’s Sizzlin’ Snake

The Gentleman “Pie”-rate

…and the delectable 40 Orange Glaze Cake

You’ll be sure to check out the gift shop afterwards!

A poster for AX! You can find me at table E21. If you’re not attending, it’ll be up for preorder on my Etsy!

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saw a twitter post where the crew places a bet to see who can seduce izzy the fastest, i’m obssessed

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the prophecy has been fulfilled etc etc

edit: since con deleted his tweet (rip), here's a link to the art!!

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hello everyone have y'all seen vico ortiz showcasing their knife skills:

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(Eta: there was an addition to this post that adds a bit more.)

I know the joke about Izzy is "human dropped into a muppets movie" but the tragedy is that he's a queer-coded character from some 1940s or 50s popcorn flick dropped into a pride parade in a floating gayborhood & he flat out has no idea how to deal with it. We learn he's a great swordsman in the most homoerotic way possible when he uses his skills to cut open a man's shirt. We see him react more openly and with less inner conflict when Ed slaps him on the back and says "I need you here" than when Ed implies to him, a minute earlier, that he could be a captain. When he's part of an overtly queer scene where other characters get the romance & he just gets the subtext, Con O'Neill's body language stands out even more—go back to the scene where Izzy tells Stede that Ed adores him, the way he strokes his fingers down the curtain dividing him from Stede. There is literally no straight explanation for this choice, but there is also no explicit acknowledgement that the character is queer; in a different, older show or movie, that body language would be the acknowledgment. He imbues the character with the looks and pauses that you would see in, like, Ben-Hur or something, where everyone knew a character was gay but nobody could say it out loud. Keep in mind that in the comedies where these characters would exist, the subtextually gay man would sometimes be best friends with a Strong Leading Man who got the girl in the end.

We hear him say outright that there's no retirement for people like Izzy & Ed, only death, which is itself a hugely loaded analogy next to the title statement "our flag means death" when you consider our history & our use of flags throughout. And Izzy's so focused on pure survival that he ends up nasty, manipulative, violent—the only way men like him can survive in his mind, or in the genre he's from, if they don't have a Strong Leading Man best friend like, say, a Blackbeard to protect him from the narrative. When Ed starts to live in Stede's world, Izzy is both losing his subtextual boyfriend and also acting as though Ed's going to get himself (and Izzy) killed if he keeps going down this path.

I will never be sane over this. Izzy is a Celluloid Closet case study who's been dropped into a Logo TV original, and so much of the conflict of his character comes from his trying to use the coping techniques from that world (including techniques used by queer coded villains! He's not healthy!) in a world where these techniques are actively harmful rather than a way to survive.

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While we like to joke about Izzy being in the wrong genre, I would argue that there are in fact at least five distinct genre universes in the world of Our Flag Means Death, and all of them have different rules.

Stede Bonnet, and his crew when they’re around him, live in a Muppet movie. I didn’t come up with this analogy but it’s so accurate. Insane physical comedy and comedy-action where no one really gets hurt. Mild peril but you know everything is gonna work out. Terrible puns and sight gags, but room for sweet, genuine emotional moments too. The rules of time, space, probability and logic will bend for a good joke.

Izzy Hands is in a grimdark action/drama where if someone gets stabbed in the gut they will behave normally and fucking die. (Probably slowly and painfully, of sepsis.) Crucially I think Izzy also lives in a genre where you can only be subtextually queer, and violence (done for or with or to each other) is the only acceptable form of intimacy between men. This is why being forcibly dragged into Stede’s world, where everyone is busy having silly low-stakes misadventures and being gay and emotionally available all over the main text–and seeing his Subtextual Boyfriend go into this world and love it–sends him round the twist.

The British, Spanish and other imperialist militaries are in a Master and Commander-style naval adventure where they’re the heroes. This is why they all take it completely seriously when Stede (unintentionally) kills Badminton and takes hostages, even though we can see that he bumbled his way into it ass-backwards. This is also why Stede is so shocked to get actually for real stabbed aboard the Spanish ship. (“Did you mean to do that?”) He didn’t realize until that moment that he’d stepped into a different genre. The stabbing is one of the first Surprise Genre Switch moments we get and in retrospect it’s very important for setting up that in this world, the threat of getting hurt or killed is very real–which we need to understand to know that there are real stakes much later, when Stede almost gets executed by the British.

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