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Like to charge reblog to cast

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tgis is so fucking funny to me. they accidentally Rock Lee'd a retired racehorse

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being anti ai is making me feel like in going insane. "you asked for thoughts about your characters backstory and i put it into chat gpt for ideas". studies have proven its making people dumber. "i asked ai to generate this meal plan". its causing water shortages where its data centers are built. "ill generate some pictures for the dnd campaign". its spreading misinformation. "meta, generate an image of this guy doing something stupid". its trained off stolen images, writing, video, audio. "i was talking with my snapchat ai-" theres no way to verify what its doing with the information it collects. "youtube is impletmenting ai based age verification". my work has an entire graphics media department and has still put ai generated motivational posters up everywhere. ai playlists. ai facial verification. google ai microsoft ai meta ai snapchat ai. everyone treats it as a novelty. every treats it as a mandatory part of life. am i the only one who sees it? am i paranoid? am i going insane? jesus fucking christ. if i have to hear one more "well at least-" "but it does-" "but you can-" im about to lose it. i shouldnt have to jump through hoops to avoid the evil machine. have you no principles? no goddamn spine? am i the weird one here?

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"Toddler Weatherman: The Reign of Y/N Wolff" 🌧️🏎️

F1 Grid x Toddler!Reader (Platonic)

Genre: Platonic | Humor | Chaos | Soft Family Vibes

Warnings: None, unless you count F1 drivers getting owned by a toddler

Word Count: 1,041

[SCENE 1: PADDOCK MORNINGS]

The 2025 season had seen a lot of bizarre things: a raccoon in the Ferrari garage, Logan Sargeant accidentally sending a drone into a Red Bull hospitality tent, and Pierre Gasly's spontaneous opera performance in the pit lane.

But nothing — nothing — matched the absolute phenomenon that was Toto Wolff's three-year-old daughter, Y/N Wolff.

She was everywhere. Mercedes garage? She had her own little chair labeled “Mini Boss.” FIA meetings? Someone had given her a mic, and she had opinions. Team principal briefings? She once corrected a strategy and was right.

But her real claim to fame?

Y/N Wolff was the unofficial, entirely accurate weatherman of the Formula 1 paddock.

“Papa,” she said one morning, tugging on Toto's sleeve while chewing on the end of a pen she’d stolen from the engineers.

Toto, half-listening while reviewing tire strategy, hummed, “Yes, liebe?”

“Clouds are mad. They gonna cry. We need green tires.”

James Allison looked up from the briefing. “You mean inters?”

She nodded sagely. “Green. Wet. Zoom safe.”

Toto blinked. “It’s 25°C with no clouds.”

Y/N turned her tiny face toward the garage opening and narrowed her eyes at the sky. “I feel it in my eyebrows.”

The grid laughed at the idea when Lewis Hamilton posted it to his story: “Y/N Wolff: weather forecaster by eyebrow tingles 🫠”

But then? It rained.

Exactly 11 minutes later. Out of nowhere. Right during FP1.

Mercedes was on inters. Everyone else scrambled.

Toto didn’t even celebrate. He just handed Y/N a cookie and said, “Thank you, mein little barometer.”

[SCENE 2: THE LEGEND GROWS]

By Silverstone, people weren’t even checking Accuweather.

They were checking Y/N Wolff.

Max Verstappen casually leaned into the Mercedes motorhome, looked around, spotted her coloring a diagram of the pit lane with crayons, and asked, “Is it gonna rain today?”

She didn't even look up. “No. Just mean sun. Make helmets spicy.”

He nodded. “Got it.”

Esteban Ocon brought her a fruit pouch in exchange for the next weekend’s forecast.

Carlos Sainz bribed her with stickers.

Lando made a whole vlog segment titled: “Consulting Baby Wolff: Weather or Not?”

Her track record? Flawless.

Y/N Wolff became the paddock's most trusted weather source.

[SCENE 3: SINGAPORE CHAOS]

It was the Singapore Grand Prix.

And every weather app said: Clear. Dry. Hot.

Ferrari was starting on softs. Red Bull too. Even Mercedes was leaning toward a two-stop dry strategy.

Until Y/N marched into the strategy room (wearing sunglasses and a headset she definitely wasn't using correctly), plopped a juice box on the table like a threat, and declared:

“Papa. Wet zooms.”

Toto blinked. “Again?”

She nodded. “Sky got that tummy ache look.”

George Russell, suppressing a laugh, tilted his head. “What kind of tummy ache?”

“The throw-up one.”

Everyone stared.

Toto sighed. “Put the inters on standby.”

People thought Mercedes had lost it. The other teams snickered.

Then, five minutes into the race, monsoon.

Everyone spun.

Except Mercedes.

Camera footage caught Y/N sitting on her dad’s lap in the pit wall chair, sipping apple juice like a villain.

[SCENE 4: FIA ACKNOWLEDGES]

At one point, someone from the FIA actually tried to question Toto about the use of a toddler as a forecasting tool.

“She’s not a tool,” he said dryly. “She’s an asset.”

Lewis stood behind them and added, “Honestly? I trust her more than our sensors.”

Someone printed shirts that said: “Y/N WOLFF SAID IT'D RAIN. IT DID.”

They sold out.

[SCENE 5: DRIVER GROUP CHAT - LEAKED]

F1 Driver GC: “MUST BOX FOR MEMES”

Max: ok who has the weather report from Y/N

Charles: i tried to get it but she told me i smell like old tires and to go away

Oscar: that’s because you stepped on her coloring page last week

Lando: she told me it would rain on saturday

Carlos: did she say how long??

George: she said it would be “puddle big.” make of that what you will

Lewis: translation: full wets, probably

Pierre: who gave her my sunglasses. she’s holding them hostage

Alex: she traded them for the forecast. classic toddler extortion

Yuki: I RESPECT HER

[SCENE 6: TODDLER FORECAST FAME]

One weekend, she held an impromptu press conference.

Y/N was sitting on a folding chair, legs swinging, surrounded by microphones. Someone had made her a tiny Mercedes polo.

“Today is big wet. Big. Like bathtub. No dry zooms.”

A journalist raised their hand. “And wind conditions?”

“Wind go whooosh!”

The video hit 50 million views in two days.

[SCENE 7: FINAL RACE - ABU DHABI]

Final race of the season. Everything was on the line. Championship-deciding.

Teams were staring at conflicting forecasts.

Sky: dry. FIA: drizzle maybe? Pirelli: no rain.

Y/N Wolff, now sitting in her custom throne (a modified race seat on the pit wall), raised a finger.

“Rain. In twenty-three minutes. Left side only.”

People laughed.

Until the radar confirmed it.

She had predicted not just the time, but the part of the track where the rain would hit.

Mercedes won the championship. With the right tires. Right time. Right call.

After the cooldown lap, Lewis dedicated his win to her.

“To the tiniest strategist with the biggest weather brain.”

[EPILOGUE: POST-SEASON]

A Netflix documentary episode was dedicated to her:

Formula Forecast: The Rise of Weather Baby Wolff

Clips included her scolding Max for knocking over her juice, telling Charles he wasn’t allowed to wear yellow near her ("Too bright! My eyes say ow!"), and sneakily sticking cloud stickers on the side of the McLaren garage when she thought rain was coming.

The final scene showed Toto hugging her post-race, lifting her up.

“Do you want to be team principal when you grow up?” he asked.

She shook her head. “Nope. I wanna be the sky boss.”

[COMMENTS SECTION - F1 YOUTUBE CHANNEL]

@tifosicharles55: not me checking her forecast before planning my wedding

@landozsmile: i would trust her with my taxes

@skyiscrying: NOT THE EYEBROW TINGLE ACCURACY

@mercedesbossbaby: she’s not the weather girl she’s the weather god

@maxispinning: the fact that she took down 10 strategists with a crayon and a vibe is insane

And somewhere, in the off-season quiet, Y/N Wolff looked out a window, squinted, and whispered:

“Clouds mad again.”

The paddock braced.

End.

Taglist: @moonlightphilosopher, @karinari1, @jessk23, @bunnisplayground, @thisdoesntexsist-cherry, @bookworm-weirdofor-life, @skzlover24, @lottie810, @josephinel83, @hades-favourite-daughter, @princess3055

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And they said Lando would crumble under the pressure of so many fans screaming his name. He said he felt supported and raced to make them proud.

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like that’s bride and groom fr

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lando & oscar at the mtc debrief

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Lando winning always provides a good block list on social media. He deserved that win, it was not gifted.

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Hiiii gentle reminder that Lando’s strategy was not in McLaren’s plans and was actually a consequence of his mistake in the first lap.

He was the one who “faked” having his tyres cooked (he then proceeded to keep the fastest lap for at least five or six laps after saying those exact words) and McLaren literally took a gamble on him by saying ‘well, we are already back (at that time he was still running in P4) it can’t go worse than this’

Again, a gamble, it turned out in his favour or, at the very least, if there had been more laps than that it probably wouldn’t have been the case given that he was running on 38 laps old tyres.

Which also makes his last stint even more impressing, thank you.

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Lando Norris has finished either first or second in all but three races this season just FYI

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Bernie Collins said she'd rather be Oscar's race engineer than Lando's because Oscar would study the data and pay attention in meetings, only to then also admit she doesn't actually know either of them, Nico has gone full on mentality warrior and taken digs at Lando left and right for the last couple months, and I'm supposed to believe Sky has an overwhelming Lando bias. Ok sure.

Meanwhile Lando is known as one of the first drivers to arrive and last to leave the paddock on Saturdays and Sundays, has been repeatedly hailed for his feedback, was named by Gabriel Bortoleto as the driver he learned from in McLaren based on how he provides feedback, etc.

It's honestly disgusting at this point. Everyone around him hails his work ethic and then some asshole who doesn't know him at all has a platform and takes a completely uneducated and unnecessary swipe.

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really excited to see how people twist this win into being something lando lucked into or didn’t deserve

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lando ‘can’t handle pressure’ norris just won on a sub-optimal strategy with his teammate on his gearbox for the last 10 laps on much fresher tyres… how are sky sports going to cope

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Because I know what happens when Lando wins.

1 - Oscar had to pit to cover off Charles therefore Oscar could not have done the one stop.

2 - Even on 39 lap old tires Lando managed to stay ahead of Oscar.

3 -On the final lap when the team radioed Oscar and reminded him of how they race at McLaren. Andrea Stella said on the post race show the two rules are don’t move under breaking and don’t aggressively dive on the inside.

4 - If Lando had come out of lap 1 in third I don’t think they would’ve necessarily gone for a one stop. But ultimately Lando was put in the position where the only way to win was to do a one stop. Before the race, a lot of the simulations said that it two stop would be best. It’s not that McLaren gave Lando the preferred strategy. It’s that it ended up being the preferred strategy.

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I CAN’T BELIEVE LANDO ACTUALLY DID IT!!

lando dropping to P5, clawing back, THEN fighting off oscar and dodging traffic in the last laps??

he deserves every bit of this win and then some 🧡

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landoscamily just all happy for each others wins 😭❤️

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landoscar waffle-decorating moments 🧇🇧🇪

i always look at my homies like that, part 2

when their voices go all soft speaking a different language

whatever this is

oscar asks a question and gets distracted by lando's cuteness. what else is new

yeah, i won't say it