recalledrobot

[recalledrobot]

my body hurts in lots of different ways

12x16 in. acrylic on canvas. 2023.

[recalledrobot]

poor memory is a huge deal and i wish people wouldn't diminish it by saying "oh yeah i can't remember what i had for breakfast lol."

i can't remember the first 10 years of my life. i can't remember entire days, weeks, months at a time. i can't remember entire people, i can't remember names or faces. i can't remember when things are scheduled for, my calendar app on my phone is booked to the max with reminders and task checklists. i can't remember when i moved into what home when, i can't remember important milestone dates like when i got or lost certain jobs, or when i started a new hobby.

that's what i mean when i say i have poor memory. poor memory is so scary for the person who has it. it's not a quirky thing, everyone forgets small details. memory problems are scary because you can go through entire events or days with no memory, or plan for things in the future that you can't recall ever even looking into or scheduling. it's not a funny haha kind of thing, it's serious, and it affects a lot of people in very unavoidable ways.

not being able to plan for appointments or work schedules, not being able to remember people's names or faces, not being able to recall whether or not you were present for something or whether or not you met someone, not being able to keep track of what's happening on what dates and losing track of items because you can't remember where you put them are all very real problems, and anyone dealing with them deserves to be taken seriously, and not diminished when they choose to speak up about it.

[recalledrobot]

I think some of us ambulatory wheelchair users are getting pretty close to (or already are) throwing full time users and higher support needs disableds under the bus. And that shit needs to be shut down NOW.

It's the problem of: "how dare they treat us like those people!"

The problem with ableists isn't that they assume we can't walk The problem is they assume we don't need our wheelchairs if we can. That we don't need our handicapped placards or transport vehicles. That we are taking advantage of other "actually" disabled people, that the ableists also don't give a shit about unless they're using them as an excuse to be ableist.

The problem with ableists isn't that they assume we are intellectually and/or developmentally disabled. The problem is they assume that every intellectually/developmentally disabled person needs to be treated with baby talk, dismissal, and ignorance. That they don't see them as people and refuse to listen to intellectually and developmentally disabled voices without making fun of them.

Stop throwing people with higher support needs under the bus. Stop doing what the abled neurodivergent community did to all physically disabled people. Us cripples gotta stick together and fight for one another, not push one down to make ourselves somehow look better to ableist fucks.

[recalledrobot]

Things my body can’t tolerate:

- Heat - Cold - Humidity - Rain - Extreme Dryness - Over exertion - Mild exercise - No exercise - Standing up - Sitting down - Lying flat - Lying on my side - Lying on my back - Lying on my stomach - Sleep - No sleep - Eating - Not eating

[recalledrobot]

If there’s one thing I feel I can unambiguously brag about, it’s that I’m great with patients who are in pain crises. I’m tenacious and stubborn about lowering 10/10 pain to something more manageable. I got a patient in “25 out of 10” pain at start of shift down to a 4 by midnight and it only took opioids, Tylenol, muscle relaxants, ice packs, warm blankets, fresh coffee, repositioning, an abdominal binder I scrounged up, a phone call to the surgeon to get lidocaine patches ordered, and some serious chit chatting with the patient while we waited for all that to kick in. We didn’t end up needing IV medication, we didn’t have to increase opioids, we didn’t need to add any medication that would potentially delay discharge, and the majority of what I did is all stuff she can also do at home so it’s a sustainable pain management plan. This is my absolute favorite thing with nursing, I love love love managing pain, I know I talk about it a lot but it’s the most satisfying thing in the world. I love watching someone emerge from a horrendous haze of pain until they feel like a person again. Also I’m scheduling this to post well after my shift is done so that I don’t jinx anything, also while I was writing this post I had to take a quick break for two hours half way through because someone started having a seizure. My job is wild. I used to be a barista.

[recalledrobot]

shout out to people with unclear or unknown prognoses.

For people whose condition is under researched. For people whose condition is rare. For people whose condition doesn’t react to typical treatment. For people whose condition interacts with other comorbidities in unpredictable ways. For people without access to specialists.

It can be exhausting not knowing how your future (weeks or decades) will look. And it can be exhausting trying to explain to people that you don’t have the answers, that you don’t know if you’ll get better or when. It can be scary not knowing how to move forward, and what treatments to seek.

Look after yourself best you can with the uncertainty. You’re not alone.

[recalledrobot]

I don't think people understand how much energy it takes every day to be mentally and physically ill and just… keep everything on track.

Every day, several times a day, I work to make sure I am drinking enough water. If I don't. It will affect my chronic illness. I will feel ill and everything will be harder.

Everyday I try to make sure I eat two to three meals. Sometimes it's hard because I feel ill, sometimes it's hard because, mentally, food is repulsive. If I don't eat I will end up feeling more ill.

When I am standing I have to make sure I don't stand for too long. If I don't I will feel faint.

When I am sitting I have to make sure I am not sitting the wrong way. If I don't I will strain my joints, I might pull them out of place. I will be in pain for days.

Sometimes a change in the weather will make me feel ill.

Sometimes a change in the air quality will make me feel ill.

I have to check the ingredients of everything I eat or I will be ill. I'm not just looking for one thing. It's dozens of things. Some things only become a problem depending on the amount. Some things only become a problem depending on how they are processed. It's a constant struggle to remember everything. If I make one mistake I will have digestive issues.

But if I get too stressed or am having other chronic problems flare up I might have digestive issues anyways.

When I am stressed I try not to tense up my muscles. If I do, I will be sore for days. It might affect my joints.

But it's easy for me to be stressed. Small changes to my routine are painful. I get overwhelmed by people, by noise, by unexpected change. I work hard to manage it but it's hard.

Sometimes something very normal happens but I have trauma so it feels incredibly not normal for me. It might take days to figure out what exactly happened and how to dig myself out of my emotions.

My memory is poor. There is so much I have to remember to stay mentally and physically okay. Not even good. Just okay. It's so hard to remember everything. There is almost always something falling through the cracks.

I get tired easily. Even just maintaining my mental and physical health is exhausting. But if I don't do it it is even MORE exhausting.

And it starts all over every day.

[recalledrobot]

[ID: A raven perched atop an accessible parking sign. It appears to be pointing to the sign with one toe.]

I think Tumblr will enjoy this image

[recalledrobot]

i started doing things scared and doing things alone years ago the real challenge is doing things tired

[recalledrobot]

$75 to go!! Thanks to everyone who has shared and supported this far! 💖

Wow I meant to post this so many hours ago but, urgent mutual aid request:

Us folks behind Sad Clown Club have to pay our rent TODAY to avoid late fees, and we're $105 short. If you have a lil something to spare, please consider directly supporting us. You can send tips to AzikaVirus or Glowbot on Venmo or Cashapp, or hit up our Ko-Fi!

Please share to help us reach our goal <3 love u

[recalledrobot]

have you joined the chronic pain club today? it's not too late!

[recalledrobot]

happy disability pride month to people with visible differences

happy disability pride month to people for whom being "visibly disabled" or "obviously ill" doesn't make people believe you or doctors diagnose and treat you and then you have to see people saying otherwise, constantly, forever

happy disability pride month to people who are afraid to take and post selfies and to people who are afraid to dress up and to people who are afraid to go out (and to people who fucking can't anymore) and to people who are afraid to date because of their visible differences

happy disability pride to people who are having to watch their illnesses and disabilities become worse because it is a change they can see

happy disability pride month to people whose illness or disability affects how their face looks and moves especially

happy disability pride month to people who only ever see their disability represented as a joke

happy disability pride month to people who have become visibly different but weren't before

and happy disability pride month to people who are visibly different and visibly i/dd, cognitively disabled, or severely mentally ill because i know people treat you worse when you're both

[recalledrobot]

ID: Drawing of a green triceratops on a light blue background. The triceratops is sweating profusely and looks displeased and unamused. “I do not like the summer weather” is handwritten in black capital letters beside it.

sweaty

[recalledrobot]

wailing because of. The fucking difficulty

[recalledrobot]

Hey I’m back again! Still on my main blog @glowbot if you like pretty pictures and mcr! Might still post here too.

I will say there’s unfortunately not really described content on my main yet. I need to find folks that post/reblog stuff I like with IDs still.

[recalledrobot]

7:21am kitchen eats

[recalledrobot]

Let me in the lobster hotbox