rhysand-is-daddy

[rhysand-is-daddy]

feyre: good morning

rhysand: good morning

azriel: good morning

cassian: you all sound like robots saying the same thing spice it up a little

morrigan: *dramatic entrance* MORNING SLUTS

[rhysand-is-daddy]

lorcan: elide told me to be more in touch with my feminine side. so i crashed the car

[rhysand-is-daddy]

cassian: rhys just called me and told me that they might but his and feyres daughter in special ed classes because of her homework.

cassian: i’ve been doing her homework.

[rhysand-is-daddy]

fenrys: you know what they say when life gives you lemons you...

fenrys: throw them at small children.

fenrys: i have six felonies.

[rhysand-is-daddy]

dorian: chaol just texted me back “lmfao” from the other room.

doran: i hear no laughing.

dorian: i’m friends with a laugh liar.

[rhysand-is-daddy]

aelin: i sometimes look at rowan and think bullying is okay

rowan: i love you too...

[rhysand-is-daddy]

percy: last night i almost got mugged by a ballerina. she tried to make me pass away. then the bitch spun away

[rhysand-is-daddy]

dorian: aw babe you’re so romantic lighting candles for me

manon: *drawing a pentagram* bitch i’m about to sacrifice you

[rhysand-is-daddy]

kilorn: i just inhaled a whole can of fabreeze

kilorn: i’m totally trippin balls right now

mare: uh- are you okay?

kilorn: better question is, how am i still alive?

[rhysand-is-daddy]

aelin: lorcan truth or dare?

lorcan: god... um dare.

aelin: i dare you to go home.

[rhysand-is-daddy]

cassian: i’ve got a dick and a knife and one of them is gonna be inside of you

nesta: i prefer the knife because then i’d actually feel it

[rhysand-is-daddy]

aelin: i’m the best person you’re going to have a relationship with. fuck the signs. i am the sign. i’m from god bitch

[rhysand-is-daddy]

aelin: i’ve started swearing in ice cream flavors two days ago and i cant stop

dorian: ..how do you swear in ice cream flavors?

aelin: what the mint chocolate chip did you say to me punk? i’ll kick your rocky road and beat the vanilla out of you

lysandra: beautiful

[rhysand-is-daddy]

cassian: come home with me

nesta: i can’t i have too much homework

cassian: i heard your grades were bad anyways, this d won’t hurt you

[rhysand-is-daddy]

cassian: when was the first time you realized you loved me?

nesta: still waiting for it

[rhysand-is-daddy]

rowan: i love you

aelin: as you should you fucking bitch

[rhysand-is-daddy]

fenrys: so people like yellow beads. some people like green beads. personally, i like anal beads.