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right4you · 1 month ago

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Only in the Dark - DBF!Joel Miller x Reader

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Pairing: dbf!Joel Miller x f!Reader

Summary: Your dad’s best friend has been sneaking around with you for months. But secrets don’t stay buried forever.

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI. Age gap. Secret relationship. Unprotected pi/v. Praise & light degradation. Breeding kink. Sneaky sex. Overstimulation. Soft choking. Oral (f receiving, from behind). Rough sex. Conflicted feelings. Emotional tension. Guilt. Possessiveness. Slight angst.

Word count: 15.2k

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It starts like it always does.

You look too long. And he looks back.

Joel’s standing by the grill with your dad, one hand wrapped around a sweating beer bottle, the other resting on his hip like he’s already sick of standing still. The sun’s high, heavy on his back, catching on the salt-slick sweat at the base of his neck. His shirt—an old gray one with the Miller’s Construction logo faded across the chest—sticks damp to his shoulders, clinging in places your eyes have no business landing.

He talks like he’s distracted. Answers half-asked questions. Grunts through conversation. And every time you glance his way, there’s tension in the set of his mouth—like his jaw is wired shut, like every syllable tastes wrong.

You’re across the yard, curled into one of those plastic lawn chairs that sinks in the middle, one leg tucked under you. Your dress rides up a little more every time you shift. It’s nothing obscene. Nothing anyone would notice.

Except Joel.

You take a slow sip from your drink. Run your thumb along the rim of the cup. Pretend not to notice the way his eyes track the movement. You cross your legs, careless, slow. The hem slides up again—just a touch. Not enough for anyone else to care.

But enough for him to clench the bottle tighter in his hand.

He doesn’t say a word. Doesn’t even glance at you directly.

But his fingers twitch when he sets the beer down. His brows pull in when he thinks no one’s looking. And when he shifts his weight, the fabric of his jeans pulls tight across his thighs—and you catch yourself looking just a second too long.

That’s when his eyes find you.

Direct. Steady. Loaded.

You freeze, your glass halfway to your mouth.

The air pulls tight.

It’s not innocent. Not casual. Not a glance that glances and forgets.

He looks at you like he knows. Like he’s already punishing himself for wanting to look.

And still—he doesn’t look away.

Not for a long second. Not until your stomach flips and your skin burns and your thighs press tight together under your dress.

You’re the one who looks away. You always are.

You shift again in your chair. Run your fingers through your hair. Let it fall back behind your shoulder in a soft sweep that feels just a little too performative.

You laugh when someone calls your name from across the yard. Smile. Sip again.

And all the while, you can feel him watching.

Even when you don’t dare look up.

Joel is careful. He always has been. That’s what makes it worse—how quiet he is about the way he looks at you. How long he holds back before finally giving in. Like his restraint is some kind of mercy. Like not touching you is the best he can offer.

He talks to your dad. Drinks another beer—then a third. Paces around the grill like something’s burning under his skin and there’s no fire he can put out. You see the way his hand curls tight around the neck of the bottle, how his gaze keeps drifting your way only to snap back, like it betrays him every time.

You’re crouched beside the cooler now, fingers digging through the ice as you pretend to search for something buried deep. The hem of your dress rides up against the backs of your thighs, and for a moment, you don’t fix it. You let your back arch just a little. Let your fingers linger.

There are voices nearby. Your cousin. Maybe your dad–Michael, again. You’re surrounded on all sides. But still—you feel him.

Before he even steps onto the patio, before the wood creaks beneath his boots—you feel the air shift. Heavy. Loaded.

His shadow stretches across the cooler. You don’t turn.

“I told myself I wasn’t gonna come over here,” he mutters.

You straighten slowly, your fingers brushing water from your wrist, letting your movements stay slow. Intentional. You smooth your dress down like you don’t know he’s watching your every motion.

“You always say that,” you murmur into your glass.

His voice stays low. Measured. Already strained, like he’s been losing this argument with himself all day.

“You always make it hard.”

You glance at him over your shoulder, lashes low. Your voice soft. Sweet. Dangerous. “Me? I haven’t said a word to you all day.”

“Didn’t need to.”

He’s closer now. Not touching you, but close enough that the heat radiates off him, thick and unmistakable. Close enough that if someone rounded the corner, you’d have to step back. Laugh. Pretend this was nothing. That it’s always been nothing.

Joel lowers his voice, just for you. “That dress. No bra. Nothin’ under it, is there?”

You turn—slow and deliberate. Let your gaze drag up his body, past his chest, his throat, until your eyes find his.

You smile. Sweet. Sharp. Like a blade in honey.

“No.”

His expression cracks—just for a moment. Like it hurts. Like he wasn’t ready to hear it said aloud.

But he doesn’t move. Doesn’t touch you. He never does—not out here. Not with your family buzzing behind the hedges. Not with your father three yards away, beer in hand and none the wiser.

Still, you can feel the weight of his want. Pressing. Building.

“This is gonna kill me,” he says softly.

Your dad calls out from the patio then, voice casual but loud enough to carry.

“Hey, Joel—you mind givin’ her a hand with that old cabinet upstairs? Damn thing’s been wobblin’ again.”

Joel blinks. You watch his throat work as he swallows something down.

He hesitates. Just for a second.

You can see it—the flicker in his expression. That split second of panic, of restraint, of God, not now, but your dad’s already waving him off like it’s no big deal.

“She’s been complainin’ about it all week,” he adds, tipping his beer toward the house. “Should only take a minute.”

Joel shifts his weight, eyes skating toward you like it hurts. “Yeah,” he says, quiet. “Course.”

You smirk. Sweet as honey.

“Thanks,” you chirp. “It’s just the knob on the top drawer—it keeps sticking. Come on, I’ll show ya.” Your voice is softer than it needs to be. Your smile just a little too wide. Joel clocks it immediately. His jaw ticks.

And maybe your dad doesn’t notice, but you do.

Joel scratches the back of his neck. Doesn’t meet your eyes. Doesn’t say anything else as you lead the way into the house, your bare feet padding softly across the tile.

You don’t look back.

Not until the door clicks shut behind you—and the silence wraps tight around the two of you like a secret.

The house is cooler than it was outside, the air humming with the low whir of an old ceiling fan and the muffled sound of laughter spilling in from the patio. You lead him through the kitchen without a word, every step deliberate, measured. He trails a few feet behind you—just far enough to keep himself honest.

You open the door to the hallway and gesture toward your bedroom. “It’s just in here.”

Joel exhales slow, like he already regrets this. “Don’t know why your dad doesn’t just buy new furniture.”

You glance at him over your shoulder, your smile coy. “Maybe he likes things that are broken.”

Joel huffs. Doesn’t answer.

You walk ahead, hips swaying gently beneath the soft cotton of your dress. You can feel him behind you—feel the weight of his gaze pressed against your back like a brand.

The room smells like your lotion and the faint trace of summer air drifting through a cracked window. Joel steps in behind you and pauses, hands on his hips, eyes scanning everything but you. You point toward the old cabinet tucked beside the window.

“There,” you say lightly. “Top drawer sticks. Thought maybe it just needed tightening or something.”

He walks over to it. Crouches down. Pulls the drawer halfway out, just to see how bad it really is.

And you?

You step in behind him–too close. Close enough that the hem of your dress brushes his shoulder. Close enough that he can smell your shampoo—feel the warmth of your bare legs, the hum of your breath when you lean just slightly over his shoulder to peek at the drawer.

“Think you can fix it?” You ask, voice soft. Sweet. Barely above a whisper.

Joel stiffens. His fingers pause on the handle. You can see the tension in his arms, the way his shoulders rise just slightly—like every inch of him is screaming don’t.

“Maybe,” he mutters. “Maybe not.”

You hum. “Guess I’ll owe you either way.”

He pulls the drawer out farther than he needs to. Not really looking at it now. Not really seeing anything at all. He’s gone still, like something inside him is locking up. Holding him back.

Your chest brushes his arm when you shift your weight. You lay your hand on the top of the dresser like it’s nothing, fingers splayed, pink polished nails catching the light. Joel’s eyes drop to them for half a second before he jerks his gaze away.

“You’re not making this easy,” he says, low. Rough. Almost like it hurts.

You blink, feigning innocence. “What do you mean?”

He rises slowly to his full height. Not touching you—but close enough to tower.

You tilt your head and smile. “I haven’t done anything.”

Joel’s jaw clenches. His hands flex at his sides.

You turn back toward the dresser like you’re going to give him space, give him a chance to breathe—and that’s when he moves.

His hand wraps around your wrist, gentle but firm. “You really gonna keep pretendin’ this ain’t killin’ you too?”

His gaze drags over you slowly. Not like he’s trying to intimidate you—more like he’s trying to survive it. His eyes trace the outline of your parted lips, linger on the delicate curve of your chest, then fall to your thighs, pressed a little too tightly together in anticipation.

There’s a flicker of something in his expression. Like amusement. Like disbelief that you’re really here—doing this to him again.

“You know what your problem is?” He murmurs, voice low and hoarse.

You swallow hard. Try to speak, but nothing comes.

Joel steps in close, his breath warm against your ear. “You look at me like that,” he says, a half-laugh tucked in behind the words. “Bat those fuckin’ eyes… all soft, all sweet. Like I don’t know what you’re doin’.”

You feel heat rise up your spine. Your stomach clenches.

“And this dress?” He goes on, mouth brushing just beneath your jaw. “No bra. No shame. Bein’ real generous with your thighs all afternoon. In front of everybody.”

It’s not cruel. It’s not harsh. He says it like he’s teasing you for getting away with it. Like he’s impressed. Like it’s killing him and he doesn’t even want you to stop.

You shift your weight, unsure if you’re trying to get away or lean into him.

He doesn’t let you do either.

Your lips part. You want to play innocent. Want to tease him back. But your voice catches somewhere behind your tongue.

Joel sees it—sees the flicker of doubt, of want, of that same ache carved between your ribs that’s been digging into his all damn day. He smiles then. Not smug. Not cruel. Just tired. Like he’s been carrying this weight for too long and finally stopped pretending he can.

He doesn’t rush.

One hand slips to your hip, the other flattening against your lower back, guiding you—not roughly, but firmly—until your thighs brush the edge of the bathroom counter. His touch is steady. Certain. The kind of sure that says this has been a long time coming.

Then he turns you.

You don’t realize you’re holding your breath until his hand splays wide across your belly—warm and heavy, grounding you to the bathroom counter. Joel’s behind you, chest brushing your back, his mouth hovering over your shoulder like he can’t decide whether to kiss it or bite.

In the mirror, his eyes drag down your reflection—your parted lips, the tight grip you’ve got on the edge of the sink, the way your thighs press together like you’re trying to keep something in.

“Look at you,” he mutters, breath warm against your skin. “All worked up and I haven’t even fuckin’ touched you yet.”

You swallow hard. You’re soaked already. You know he can feel it—your heat bleeding through the thin cotton of your dress, your pulse fluttering just beneath his palm.

Joel’s hand slides up, slow and deliberate, over the slope of your ribs, the curve of your breast. He doesn't grope. He just holds—firm and steady, like he wants to feel the beat of your heart against his fingers.

You lean back into him, needy, aching.

He laughs—quiet, wrecked. “Knew this dress was gonna kill me. Knew the second I saw you sittin’ out there like you wanted to be dragged in here.”

You whimper, and he dips his head, nose brushing your jaw.

“Didn’t say a word all afternoon. Just sat there lettin’ that little thing ride up higher and higher—knowin’ damn well I was watchin’.”

His other hand slips lower—beneath the hem, over your thigh. His touch is light, maddening, fingers skimming until they brush the bare, soaking heat of you.

He hisses, teeth clenched. “Fuckin’ hell.”

“Joel—” you whisper, but it’s nothing. A sound. A breath.

His fingers slide between your folds, slow and obscene, slick spreading across your skin. His palm cups you from behind, fitting against your body like he was made for it.

“So wet,” he groans, pressing in just enough to make your knees buckle. “You like this that much? Me watchin’? Bein’ this fuckin’ filthy with your whole family sittin’ twenty feet away?”

You don’t answer. Can’t.

His hand slides up your chest again—this time to your throat. Just resting. Not squeezing. But it makes your breath stutter anyway. Makes your knees tremble.

You nod—barely—and he smirks at your reflection.

“That’s what I thought.”

And then—

He drops to his knees behind you.

You gasp, hands tightening on the counter, heart pounding.

Joel grips your hips, pushes your thighs apart, and then presses a kiss—hot and open-mouthed—to the curve just beneath your ass.

“You’re drippin’,” he mutters, voice muffled by skin. “Fuck me.”

You whimper, try to look back, but he tugs your hips gently and says, “Eyes on the mirror. You watch what I do to you.”

You do.

You watch as he spreads you open with both hands, thumbs parting you gently, reverently. His breath hits your folds and you jerk, moaning into the air.

And then his mouth is on you.

His tongue licks a thick, wet stripe from your entrance to your clit, then circles back—slow and messy and devoted. Like he’s trying to memorize the way you taste. The way you shake. The way your body reacts to every drag of his tongue.

He groans against you, the sound low and guttural, like he’s the one losing control.

Your thighs quake. “Joel—oh my god—”

He sucks your clit into his mouth and your vision blacks out for a second. Your hands scrabble for purchase on the counter.

“Fuckfuckfuck—” you cry, biting your lip so hard you taste blood.

“Yeah,” he pants against you. “That’s it, baby. Let me hear it.”

He eats like a man starved. Sloppy, relentless, nose buried in you, fingers digging into your thighs to keep you right where he wants you.

You’re shaking. Your knees nearly give out.

Joel notices.

He pulls back just long enough to rasp, “Don’t fall on me now—ain’t even fucked you yet.”

Then he’s back at it. This time with fingers.

He slides two inside you without warning—thick and rough, knuckles brushing your walls while his mouth stays on your clit.

You choke on a moan. “Joel—please—I’m gonna—”

He groans. “Come for me. Right now.”

You fall apart.

You come hard, gasping, legs trembling, one hand slapping against the mirror as your whole body locks up, your muscles clenching around his fingers.

Joel curses into your cunt. Keeps licking through it.

“Shh—it’s okay. Let me have it. Just like that. So fuckin’ good for me.”

You sob. Actually sob.

And he doesn't stop.

He lets you ride it out, lets you shake and pant, and then—he slides his fingers back in.

You jolt. “Too much—Joel—”

He hums. “I know. S’why I’m doin’ it.”

You cry out, forehead pressed to the mirror.

His free hand comes to the back of your calf—gentle again, grounding, petting, almost—and he nuzzles into the back of your thigh, licking soft and slow while he works you open all over again.

“You wanted this,” he breathes. “Wanted me wreckin’ you in your daddy’s house. Don’t go shy on me now.”

You moan. Loud. Messy.

“You’re mine, ain’t you?” His voice is a rasp now. Wrecked.

You nod.

He presses a kiss to your ass. “Say it.”

“I’m yours,” you whisper.

He stands then. Fast. Pulls you back into him.

You can feel how hard he is—straining in his jeans. He fumbles with his zipper, breath ragged.

And when he pushes inside—

It’s blinding.

You both gasp. He grips your hips, steadying himself.

“Fuck—always so tight,” he growls. “So fuckin’ perfect for me.”

He thrusts slow at first. Long, deep strokes that make your eyes roll back. That make the mirror fog up.

Then faster. Rougher. Hands gripping you hard. Like he wants to leave bruises. Like he needs proof this happened.

Your cries are high-pitched now, desperate.

Joel leans in, mouth against your ear. “That’s it, baby. Take it. So fuckin’ pretty like this—face all flushed, eyes tearin’ up.”

He thrusts deeper. “You’re gonna make a mess, ain’t you? Gonna come all over my cock like a good girl.”

You nod, mouth open, moaning.

“I’ve got you,” he whispers. “Mine. All mine.”

And when you come again—when your whole body shakes and you scream his name against your own wrist—Joel fuckin’ loses it.

He groans your name, spills inside you, buries his face in your neck with a guttural curse that sounds like regret and worship tangled together.

And still, he doesn’t let go. Not right away.

His arms wrap around you, holding you close, hips still pressed to yours, his breath slowing against your skin.

The mirror’s fogged. Your thighs are soaked. The counter’s cold beneath your palms.

And Joel’s mouth is at your ear again, soft and real.

“You okay?” He whispers.

You nod. “Yeah,” you breathe. “Fuck. Yeah.”

He kisses your shoulder.

And you smile—wrecked and ruined and still so full of him.

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You show up just after lunch rush, a brown paper bag folded neatly in your arms, still warm against your chest. You’re wearing jeans and a loose shirt—something casual, safe. Your hair’s pulled back in a clip. No makeup. Nothing intentionally done to catch attention.

And still—he looks.

The construction site stretches out like a skeleton of something half-born. Steel bones. Exposed wood. Sawdust clings to the air like fog, and the sky above is sharp, cloudless, cruel.

You walk past the truck bays and toward the break area, boots crunching over gravel. A few guys nod as you pass. Most don’t.

You’re not here for them.

You spot your dad’s hard hat first—bright white with a strip of flaking duct tape across the front. He’s crouched beside a scaffolding rig, barking something at a worker below.

Joel’s standing a few feet off, one hand braced against the frame of the trailer office, his other wrapped tight around a water bottle like he’s trying to remember what it’s for. His shirt is stained at the collar. Dusty. Clings to his chest in places it shouldn’t. His pants hang low on his hips, a smear of something dark across his thigh.

He sees you before you call out. Sees you before you even mean to be seen.

The way his jaw locks—quick and brutal—tells you everything.

You wave at your dad. Lift the bag a little. “Brought lunch!”

He grins. “Jesus, you’re a lifesaver. That sandwich place?”

“Your usual.” You pass it to him and he gives your shoulder a quick squeeze before digging in like he hasn’t eaten in days. His attention shifts immediately back to the site, already barking out instructions between bites.

Joel still hasn’t moved.

You turn toward him slowly. Tilt your head. Smile like you don’t know what you’re doing.

He shakes his head once. A warning. A plea.

You ignore it.

“You eat yet?” You ask softly.

He glances around—quick, sharp, like he’s expecting eyes.

“Don’t,” he mutters under his breath. “Not here. Not—fuck, not now.”

But you’re already crossing the distance. Not enough to touch. Just enough for the scent of your shampoo to reach him.

Your voice stays low. “You looked hungry.”

His jaw twitches. He steps back. Barely. Like it physically hurts to put space between you.

“Your dad’s right there,” he hisses.

“And?”

Joel’s eyes darken. His throat works.

“And I just spent the last two hours tryin’ not to think about what I did to you in that fuckin’ bathroom.”

You smile.

Then—quietly, sweetly, so softly it barely counts as a sin: “You wanna do it again?”

His eyes snap to yours. He looks at you like you just spit holy water on him.

And still—he doesn’t say no.

He doesn’t answer.

Not with words, anyway.

Joel’s hand shoots out—rough, calloused, certain—and wraps around your wrist. He doesn’t pull hard. Doesn’t have to. You stumble forward easily, chest brushing his as he backs you toward the side of the trailer, behind the stacks of lumber and plywood. The break room door creaks open just as you disappear from sight.

Someone calls out a joke. You barely register it.

Joel slams the trailer door shut behind you and locks it without thinking.

Then he turns to you.

His chest rises hard under the fabric of his shirt. There’s sweat at his temples, clinging to the curls behind his ears. His fingers flex at his sides like he doesn’t trust them not to grab you again.

“You got no fuckin’ clue what you’re doin’ to me,” he mutters, stepping in so close you can feel the heat radiating off him. “Showin’ up like that. Smilin’ like you ain’t already got me on my knees.”

“I think you like it,” you whisper.

His eyes drop to your lips. His voice dips lower. Rougher.

“I think you like pushin’ me.”

You smile—barely—and Joel’s already moving.

He backs you against the trailer wall, one hand cupping your jaw, the other already sliding down your side, dragging over the curve of your ass with a low groan.

“This is so fuckin’ stupid,” he says, but his mouth is on yours before the sentence even finishes.

It’s not gentle. It never is with him.

His tongue sweeps into your mouth with a hunger that steals your breath, and he presses his hips hard against yours until you feel him—already thick and heavy through his jeans. You whimper into the kiss, fingers fisting the front of his shirt.

Outside, footsteps crunch over gravel. Laughter. Your dad’s voice, faint.

Joel curses and breaks the kiss, panting, forehead pressed against yours.

“We don’t have time,” he says.

“So don’t waste it,” you whisper.

That’s all it takes.

His hands are under your shirt in seconds—palms rough against your stomach as he drags the fabric up, exposing bare skin inch by inch. You reach for his belt, fumble with the buckle, but your hands are shaking too hard.

Joel growls low in his throat and does it for you.

He frees himself just as you tug your panties down, not bothering with anything else. The moment they hit your knees, Joel’s hands grip your hips and lift you—just enough to set you back on the edge of the supply table behind you, your ass barely balancing there.

The surface is cold. His body is hot. The air between you, electric.

You spread your thighs instinctively and Joel groans—deep and broken.

“Fuck, baby—already wet for me?” He runs two fingers through your slick, slow and deliberate, like he’s dragging it out on purpose. “You need me that bad?”

You nod, biting your lip. “Joel—please—”

That’s all he needs.

He lines himself up, grips your thighs hard, and pushes in—a slow, thick stretch that knocks the breath right out of your lungs. You gasp, fingernails digging into his shoulders.

Joel swears, low and dangerous.

“Every time,” he growls, bottoming out. “Every fuckin’ time you feel better than I remembered.”

He doesn’t give you a chance to adjust—he starts moving, thrusting into you with sharp, desperate rolls of his hips, the table creaking beneath your weight.

You wrap your arms around his shoulders, legs locking around his waist.

“Gonna get us caught,” he mutters, teeth grazing your jaw. “You that needy for me, baby? Can’t even wait till I get off work?”

“You didn’t stop me,” you pant.

He laughs—wrecked, breathless. “Didn’t fuckin’ want to.”

His rhythm picks up—fast, brutal, unforgiving. His hands grip your thighs, your hips, your waist—like he can’t decide which part of you he needs more.

Your back arches. The table groans again.

Joel leans in, mouth against your ear.

“Y’know what I was thinkin’ about all mornin’? That mirror. That look on your face when you came all over my fuckin’ tongue. Thought about it till I was fuckin’ hard in the damn truck.”

You moan, loud.

He clamps a hand over your mouth. “Shhh—don’t you dare.”

Your eyes flutter. He slams into you again.

“You wanna get caught? You want your daddy to come lookin’ for you and see me buried in his little fuckin’ girl like this?”

You whimper against his palm.

He growls.

“God, you do.”

He lets go of your mouth just long enough for you to moan his name.

Then he grabs your throat.

Gentle. Steady. But enough to make you whine.

“Mine,” he whispers. “Say it.”

You’re barely holding on. “Yours. I’m yours.”

Joel loses it.

He fucks you hard, fast, reckless—his breath ragged, forehead against yours. You come with a cry, clenching around him so tight it nearly brings him to his knees.

“Ah, god damnit—” he gasps, thrusting deep once, twice—

And then he comes.

It’s raw. Guttural. He groans into your neck like he’s falling apart.

You stay like that for a second—just breathing. Just shaking. Just trying to remember where you are.

Then—

“Hey!” Your dad’s voice cuts through the open air like a gunshot. “You see my daughter? She wander off again?”

Joel jerks back, eyes wide.

“Shit—”

He pulls out, tucks himself away fast, grabbing for a rag off the table to clean you up with. You’re still gasping when he yanks your panties back into place, helps straighten your shirt.

Footsteps. Closer.

Joel grabs your jaw, kisses you once—fast and rough.

“Act normal.”

Then he’s out the door.

You follow a second later, cheeks flushed, fingers shaking as you tuck your hair behind your ear. You can’t help the grin that threatens to pull at your lips, still feeling Joel’s.

Your dad’s already turning the corner.

“Where the hell’d you go?”

You smile. “Bathroom,” you lie. “You good?”

He nods, takes another bite of his sandwich.

Joel doesn’t look at you.

But you can feel him still.

Burning through every inch of your skin.

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It’s already dark when you grab your keys.

Not late—not quite—but the kind of dusk that hums with quiet. The heat’s still clinging to the windows, thick and sticky, and every room in the house feels like it’s holding its breath.

You check the mirror again.

One last time.

Hair loose, brushed soft over your shoulders. A sundress—low-cut, thin-strapped, clinging in the summer heat. You told yourself it was nothing special. Just enough to keep cool. But the way you keep tugging at the hem, the neckline, the way you keep glancing at your reflection like it might betray you—

Yeah. You know who you’re dressing for.

You slide on a light sweater anyway, just to be safe. Something to keep things modest enough for your dad to glance at you and not look twice.

He’s still on the couch when you step into the living room, one hand nursing a half-empty beer, eyes glazed from the TV. He doesn’t look up right away.

“Where you headed?” He asks, voice rough from too many years and not enough sleep.

You slip your keys into your pocket. “Lisa’s. Just for a bit. Movie night.”

He grunts. “You drivin’?”

“Yeah,” you say quickly. “Her place is further out now. New apartment.”

He doesn’t question it. Just nods, eyes still on the screen. “Be smart. Don’t drive back too late.”

“I won’t.”

Your voice is sweet. Normal. The way it always is.

“Alright. Love you, kid.”

You give him a smile—one that doesn’t tremble—and head for the door. “Love you too.” You call out over your shoulder, willing your voice to stay neutral.

The porch creaks under your feet. The air outside is cooler than inside, but not by much. You walk fast across the gravel, sweater tight around your waist now, already feeling the sweat bloom at the nape of your neck.

Your car sits in the driveway. Engine still warm from earlier.

You slide in, shut the door soft and start the ignition.

And when you pull away, your fingers are already shaking on the wheel.

Not from nerves. Not exactly.

From want. From anticipation. From knowing exactly where you’re headed.

There’s no Lisa. No movie night.

Just a field about fifteen minutes out past the highway, where Joel’s waiting in the back of his pickup, cooler packed, blankets laid out in the bed, headlights off.

No one for miles.

Just stars.

You park a little ways down the road from the pickup, engine ticking as it cools beneath the hood. Lights off. Windows cracked. The air outside hums with cicadas and the faint rush of night wind, warm against your bare skin where the hem of your sundress brushes your knees. You tug the cardigan tighter around your shoulders, heart beating too loud in your chest.

He’s already there.

You see the outline of his truck up ahead—just beyond the bend where the woods break open into a patch of field, stars spilling wide across the sky like they’ve been waiting all day just for this.

You sit for a second. Breathing.

It’s been weeks.

Too many hours spent pretending not to care. Dodging glances at family dinners. Playing dumb every time your dad mentioned him in passing. And now—you’re here. Heart caught in your throat. Thighs already pressed a little too tight together.

You grab your bag from the passenger seat. Slam the door quieter than you mean to.

Your sandals kick up dust along the roadside, gravel whispering beneath your steps. The sweater hangs off one shoulder. The sundress sways with every movement. And even though you’re alone, even though there’s no one to see—you feel watched.

Anticipated.

The moment you round the front of his truck, the door swings open.

And there he is.

Joel stands just behind it, leaning one shoulder against the frame. T-shirt stretched across his chest. Jeans slung low on his hips. Hair a little messy, like he ran his hands through it too many times waiting for you. His eyes catch the light from the dash and flash warm. Familiar. Wanting.

His mouth curves slow.

“Hi, darlin’.”

Your stomach drops. That voice. That look. That fucking pet name. It never fails—it gets you every time.

You smile, soft and breathless. “Hi.”

Joel watches you walk the last few steps like he’s soaking it in. Like you’re something he’s starved for. His gaze drags down over the dress, the sweater sliding off your shoulder, the bare stretch of thigh, the faint pink polish on your toes.

“You look…” he trails off, shaking his head. Doesn’t finish the thought.

You stop in front of him. Close enough to feel the heat radiating off his chest.

“What?” You murmur, tipping your head.

He just looks at you.

And then—he sighs, stepping forward to wrap both arms around your waist, dragging you in against him like he doesn’t trust himself not to fall apart.

“Missed you,” he says into your hair. Quiet. Hoarse.

Your hands slide up his chest. You nod into his shoulder. “I missed you too.”

Joel pulls back just enough to look at you. His fingers trail down your arms, over the sides of your waist, grounding himself.

Then he gestures toward the back of the truck. “Come on. Brought a blanket.”

You climb into the bed of the truck with him, the old metal groaning beneath your weight. It’s already spread out—a thick old quilt, fraying at the edges, familiar from a dozen other nights you weren’t supposed to share.

You sit cross-legged, facing the field. He sits beside you, knee brushing yours.

There’s no rush.

The stars stretch wide overhead, sharp and endless. The wind moves through the tall grass like it’s whispering secrets you’re not meant to hear. Everything smells like earth and woodsmoke and a hint of his aftershave.

He reaches for your hand.

You give it to him.

His thumb rubs slow along your knuckles, rough calluses dragging over soft skin. He doesn’t say anything for a while—just looks out at the dark. Like the silence is safer than whatever he’s feeling.

You lean your head on his shoulder.

He lets you. Presses a kiss into your hair.

Then—quiet, steady, honest—

“I think about you all the time.”

Your breath hitches. You sit up, just enough to look at him.

His jaw is tight. His brows pulled. Like it hurt to say. Like it hurts more to mean it. “I know it’s fucked up,” he says. “But I can’t stop.”

Your heart breaks a little.

Because it is fucked up. And neither of you have ever pretended otherwise. But this—this moment, this night, this feeling—it’s real. It’s been real.

“I think about you too,” you whisper.

He turns toward you then. Cupping your cheek with one hand, thumb brushing your jaw. His eyes search your face, like he’s looking for something he lost.

And then—barely audible, barely real— “I love you.”

You freeze.

Not from fear. Not from regret. But from how deeply it lands. How fast it settles into your bones.

Your lips part. You blink.

And you say it back.

Not loud. Not sure. But true.

“I love you too.”

Joel closes his eyes like he’s in pain. Pulls you in. Kisses you.

Slow. Reverent. Like he’s praying.

And when he lays you down on the blanket beneath the stars—he takes his time.

The quilt scratches softly beneath your spine, the summer air curling around your skin, and Joel’s body hovering above yours feels too heavy and too perfect all at once. His palm braces beside your head, the other smoothing along your thigh, pushing the fabric of your sundress higher until it bunches at your waist.

He’s already looking at you like he’s trying to memorize everything. Like the moment’s too big, too fragile to rush.

You reach for him—one hand curling around his wrist, the other brushing along the side of his neck, feeling the soft bristle of his beard beneath your palm.

Joel bends down slowly and kisses you again.

It’s different now.

Not just slow. Not just sweet. But intentional. Like every touch is something he means. Something he’s been waiting to give you.

When he pulls back, your lips are kiss-wet and parted, your breath catching as his fingers slide up beneath the hem of your dress, dragging the cotton-soft fabric higher until it’s no longer in the way. His touch lingers on the inside of your thigh—just enough to make you whimper.

“You sure?” He asks softly, voice low and rasping.

You nod, eyes wide.

But he doesn’t move—not until you say it.

“Please,” you whisper, so soft it barely makes it past your lips. “I want you.”

Joel exhales like he’s been holding that breath for days.

His hand shifts, fingertips brushing between your legs, finding you already soaked. He groans low in his throat, almost reverent.

“Goddamn.”

He sinks two fingers into you, slow and careful, watching your face. You gasp, your back arching, thighs twitching. His thumb brushes your clit once—light as a whisper—and you nearly come undone already.

“You’re so wet for me, baby,” he murmurs, leaning in to press kisses down the side of your neck. “Didn’t even have to work for it, did I?”

You shake your head, panting. “Wanted you all day.”

He fucks you with his fingers slow and deep, curling them just right. “Yeah?” His voice is lower now. Tighter. “Thought about me?”

“All the time,” you breathe. “Joel—please—”

“Alright,” he says, kissing your cheek, your temple, your jaw. “Okay. I got you.”

He pulls his hand away just long enough to unbutton his jeans, shove them down past his hips. His cock springs free—thick, flushed, already dripping for you. You watch him stroke himself once, twice, his eyes still locked on your face.

“You look so fuckin’ pretty like this,” he murmurs. “Laid out for me. Dress bunched up, legs spread, beggin’ for it.”

“Joel,” you gasp, squirming. “Please. I want you—”

“I know, baby,” he breathes. “I know. Gonna give it to you.”

He lines himself up, the head of his cock slipping through your slick folds, and he groans when he feels how wet you are—how ready.

Then—slowly—he pushes in.

You gasp, legs instinctively wrapping around his waist as he sinks deeper. It’s overwhelming—the stretch, the fullness, the intimacy of it.

Joel’s head drops to your shoulder. “Fuck—you’re so perfect—”

He doesn’t thrust. Not yet. Just stays there, buried to the hilt, his chest pressed to yours, your breaths syncing in the heavy silence.

“Feels so good,” you whisper, your hands clinging to his shoulders, nails digging in.

Joel moves then.

Slow. Deep.

His hips roll into yours like waves—long, dragging strokes that have you gasping into the night air. Every thrust knocks the breath from your lungs, every movement laced with something tender and breaking.

You whimper, arching into him. “Don’t stop—don’t stop—”

“Not gonna,” he pants, pressing a kiss to your collarbone. “Not stoppin’—not ever.”

You come with a sob.

It builds like a storm, low and tight and aching—and then it snaps. Your body seizes around him, thighs squeezing, fingers clawing at his back. You cry out his name, helpless and wrecked, trembling beneath him.

Joel curses, barely holding on. “That’s it, baby. Just like that. Fuck—so good for me—so fuckin’ good—”

And then he’s chasing his own release, hips stuttering, breath hitching in your ear.

You feel it when he comes.

The way his whole body tenses. The way his arms tighten around you like he’s afraid to let go. The soft, broken sounds he makes into your hair—like he’s praying and falling apart all at once.

When it’s over, he doesn’t move. Just stays pressed against you, his cock still inside, one hand cradling the back of your neck.

You can feel his heart pounding against your chest.

You kiss his shoulder. Whisper against his skin.

“I love you.”

Joel’s eyes are closed, his face tucked into your hair. “I love you too, baby.”

The stars stretch quiet and endless above you, the warm breeze rustling the grass around the truck bed.

And for once, neither of you say anything else.

Because you don’t need to.

You lie on your side, one leg slung over his, the weight of your body still settling from what just happened.

Joel’s hand rests on your thigh. His thumb moves slow, back and forth, the barest touch, like if he lets go you might vanish.

Neither of you have spoken in minutes.

Not since you curled into him, still trembling, breath catching from the last wave that rolled through you. Not since his lips brushed your hairline and stayed there, unmoving, like maybe he was afraid of what would slip out if he opened his mouth.

The night stretches wide above you—quiet, open, endless. The stars are the only witnesses.

You draw in a slow breath. The truck smells like him. Sweat and soap and heat.

“I hate this part,” you whisper finally.

Joel doesn’t ask what you mean. He knows.

“This is the part where everything starts to feel too real,” you murmur. “And then it gets quiet. And then I start thinking.”

He hums low in his throat, almost like a warning. “Don’t do that.”

“I have to,” you say. “One of us has to.”

Joel shifts beside you, the mattress rustling under his weight. He’s still not looking at you. “We’ve already talked about it.”

You blink up at the stars, throat tightening. “We said we’d wait. We never said when.”

“Back then it was still a maybe,” he says quietly. “Now it’s not.”

There’s a pause. Long. Heavy.

His hand is still moving on your thigh.

You swallow. “I don’t know how to tell him.”

Joel’s voice comes quieter than before. “You think I do?”

“I’m scared,” you admit.

He nods. Not mocking. Just… understanding. “Me too.”

You press your face into his shoulder for a second. Breathe him in. Let your fingers drift across the inside of his forearm, the soft patch of skin that always feels too intimate to touch.

“I keep thinking about how it’ll sound,” you whisper. “Like—‘Hey, Dad, you remember your best friend? The one you’ve worked with for twenty years? Yeah, I’ve been sneaking around with him for months. He makes me scream his name and then drives me home like nothing happened.’”

Joel flinches. Not visibly—but you feel it, in the way his stomach tightens beneath your hand.

“I don’t feel proud of it,” you murmur. “Even though I… I care about you.”

Joel finally turns toward you then. Really turns. His hand stills on your leg.

“I never wanted you to feel ashamed of me.”

“I’m not ashamed,” you say quickly. Too quickly. “I just—this isn’t what I expected.”

His brow pulls. “You mean us?”

You shake your head. “I mean how much it hurts.”

Joel doesn’t respond. He just watches you. Quiet. Intense. Like he’s trying to memorize every word without letting it show.

You trace a small circle against his arm. “You were supposed to be the one I couldn’t have. You know that?”

He exhales through his nose. “I was the one you couldn’t have.”

“And now I do,” you say softly.

Joel shifts. His hand slides from your thigh to your waist, curling there. Holding. Steady. He leans in until his forehead brushes yours.

“You don’t just have me,” he says quietly. “I’m yours.”

━━━✵━━━━━━✵━━━━━━✵━━━━━━✵━

It’s been a few weeks since that night in the truck.

Since the stars and the slow touches and the whispered I love yous that neither of you could take back—even if you wanted to.

And you don’t. Not even a little.

Things haven’t cooled off since then. If anything, they’ve deepened—evolved into something even more dangerous. Even more fragile. You see him more now. More than ever. Little excuses. Stolen afternoons. Late-night drives that last until morning. Joel’s been sweet, too—so much sweeter than anyone would guess. Like saying it out loud cracked something open in him. Something he’d been holding back for a long, long time.

It’s made the hiding worse.

Harder.

And tonight… tonight will be the last time.

You’re standing in the doorway, sweater slung over one arm, keys dangling from your fingers. The sun’s dipping low, the light slanting soft through the living room windows. Your dad’s on the couch, half-watching a ballgame, a soda sweating in his hand.

“Hey, I’m headed out,” you say, casual.

He turns his head. “Another night with the girls?”

“Yeah,” you lie smoothly. “We’re doing that stupid wine and paint thing. Someone’s gonna end up crying over a sunflower again.”

Your dad huffs a laugh. “Sounds tragic.”

You grin. Shrug your sweater on.

But his gaze lingers a little longer than usual. Not suspicious—just soft. Curious. Thoughtful.

“You’ve been out a lot lately,” he says. “Smilin’ more, too.”

You pause in the act of tucking your phone into your bag. “That a bad thing?”

“No,” he says quickly. “Hell no. It’s a good thing. Just…” He tips his head a little. “What’s got you so happy these days?”

You freeze.

Just for a second.

He doesn’t notice—or at least he pretends not to. He takes another drink, smiles around the rim of the can.

“It a boy?” He teases gently. “Someone new?”

You laugh. It sounds almost normal. “What makes you think that?”

He shrugs. “You’ve got that look. That… light. Whoever he is, he must be a good one if he’s put it there.”

Your chest aches.

Your fingers tighten around your keys.

He doesn’t know. Not yet.

You step toward the door and force a smile over your shoulder. “Yeah. He’s a good one.”

You wave once before slipping into the driver’s seat, shutting the door quick, before he can see your hands shaking.

You sit for a second. Just breathe.

Then you pull out of the driveway and head down the road, stomach fluttering like it always does when you’re about to see him.

It’s not the first time you’ve pulled into Joel’s driveway.

The gravel crunches beneath your tires the same way it always does. The porch light glows soft and golden in the fading dusk, casting long shadows over the steps you’ve memorized by heart. You park behind his truck, cut the engine, and sit for just a moment—fingers loose on the steering wheel, stomach fluttering.

You’ve been here before. Countless times now. But tonight feels different.

Because it’s the last time you get to come here like this—sneaking away under a lie, knowing he’s waiting behind the door with that look in his eyes and his shoulders already easing the moment he sees you.

You step out, the hem of your sundress catching on the breeze, the sweater sleeves bunched at your elbows. Your shoes scuff against the walk as you make your way to the porch, and before your hand can even reach the door—

It opens.

“Hi, darlin’.”

He says it soft. Like a prayer. Like the sound of you on the gravel was enough to pull him out of the living room.

Your breath catches. Joel’s leaning in the doorway, one hand braced against the frame. He looks like he’s been pacing. His hair’s a little tousled, like he’s been running his hand through it. There’s a crease in his brow that only softens when his eyes land on you.

He doesn’t smile—not fully—but there’s something close to it. Something warm. His eyes flick over you, quick and reverent. Sweater. Dress. Bare legs. Familiar.

But the way he looks at you? That part still makes your chest ache.

“Hey,” you say, breathless.

He steps back without a word, just enough to let you inside.

The door clicks softly behind you. The quiet of his house wraps around you like a blanket—low hum of the fridge, scent of laundry and sawdust and the faintest trace of his cologne still lingering in the air.

You drop your keys into the little dish by the door. Joel’s watching you like he always does—silent, heavy-lidded, like he’s drinking you in. Like he’s already wondering how he’s supposed to let this part go.

“You nervous?” You ask.

He huffs a breath, steps closer. “A little.”

You nod. “Me too.”

He doesn’t say anything at first. Just reaches for your hand, his fingers curling around yours like they’re meant to be there. His grip is warm. Steady.

Then finally, he murmurs, “Feels like this might be the last time it’s just us.”

You look up at him. “It won’t be.”

But even as you say it, your voice wavers.

Joel exhales through his nose. His thumb drags across your knuckles.

“I’ve been thinkin’ about what your dad’s gonna say,” he mutters. “What he’s gonna do.”

You nod. “I know.”

His eyes find yours again—tired, worried, but still so soft.

“You still wanna tell him?” He asks.

You hesitate. Not because the answer isn’t yes. But because yes is terrifying.

And you both know it.

You nod.

“Yeah,” you say, voice quiet. “I do.”

Joel pulls you in slowly, arms sliding around your waist, his chin resting against the top of your head. The beat of his heart is steady beneath your cheek. Familiar. Safe.

“We’ll tell him together,” he says.

You close your eyes.

And hold on tight.

⁂

Joel makes dinner.

You offer to help—more than once—but he waves you off with a quiet go sit down, sweetheart, and the kind of stern look that makes your heart flutter in your chest. So you perch at his kitchen table instead, sweater sleeves tugged over your hands, watching him move around the small space like he’s done it a thousand times.

He’s good at it. Fast. Focused. Efficient without being rushed.

He cooks the same way he does everything else—with purpose. With care.

Chicken and vegetables. Roasted potatoes. Garlic bread that fills the kitchen with the warm, buttery smell of something that feels suspiciously close to home. He doesn’t talk much while he works, but you can tell he’s nervous by the way he wipes his hands on the same dishtowel over and over again, the way he keeps glancing at you like he’s checking to make sure you’re still there.

When he finally sets the plate down in front of you, you laugh under your breath.

“What?” He grunts.

“This looks incredible,” you murmur. “You didn’t have to do all this.”

Joel shrugs. “Wanted to.”

You both eat quietly for a while. There’s music playing softly from the old speaker in the corner—something with strings, low and meandering. Every now and then your knees bump under the table, and neither of you pulls away.

He watches you when you take your last bite. Quiet and full of something like pride. Or awe. Like he still can’t quite believe you’re here.

And when he clears the plates and turns back toward you, his expression shifts.

It’s subtle. But you know that look–you know what comes next.

The shower is steam and skin and whispered promises.

You laugh when he pulls you in, still half-dressed, your sweater hitting the floor before the bathroom door even clicks shut. His hands are slow on your skin, warm beneath the spray, and everything feels both too fast and too soft—like you’re holding onto something fleeting. Like the world might shift the moment you step out of this room.

His mouth finds your shoulder. Your neck. Lower.

You gasp.

He groans.

But this time—it doesn’t go further. It stays slow. Gentle. The kind of touch that says I love you without needing to say anything at all.

Later, when you’re curled beneath the sheets, your head tucked against his chest and his arm slung heavy over your waist, you feel the weight of it settle in your chest.

Hope.

Fear.

Everything in between.

Joel kisses your hair and doesn’t say a word.

You fall asleep with your fingers curled in his shirt and the sound of his heartbeat in your ear.

⁂

The sun is barely up when you wake.

Your clothes are folded at the foot of the bed. Joel’s already up, padding around the kitchen in quiet half-steps, trying not to make too much noise. You sit on the edge of the mattress, staring down at your hands. Everything in your body feels slow. Floaty. Like you’re walking through someone else’s dream.

This is it.

You dress in silence. Joel helps you with your sweater like it’s a ceremony. And then you both stand in the doorway, keys in hand, looking at each other like there’s too much left unsaid.

“You sure?” he asks softly.

You nod. “Yeah. I’m sure.”

Joel reaches for your hand. Holds it just long enough to make your chest ache.

Then you both step outside.

Together.

The walk to the house is slow.

You’d driven separately, like always. Parked down the street like always. But this morning—there’s no space between you. Joel walks close. His hand brushes yours once, then again, until you finally lace your fingers through his and hold tight.

You both know you shouldn’t be touching.

Not here. Not now.

But it’s your last chance to do this before everything changes, and you can’t let go. Not when your chest is aching. Not when your palms are sweating. Not when every step feels heavier than the one before it.

Joel’s quiet beside you.

His face is set. Determined. But the muscle in his jaw ticks, and he keeps flexing his free hand like he can’t stop fidgeting. Like if he doesn’t move, he’ll explode.

When you reach the porch, you both pause.

The house is still. Quiet. You hear the creak of a chair on the back deck, the faint clink of a mug being set down. Your dad’s up. Probably halfway through his first coffee. Probably has no idea his entire world is about to tilt sideways.

You glance up at Joel.

He’s looking straight ahead. His jaw clenches.

You squeeze his hand. “You sure?”

His eyes drop to yours—warm, steady, terrified.

“Yeah,” he says. “I’m sure.”

You nod. Swallow hard. And knock.

Your dad answers the door with a smile already forming—slow and a little tired, like it’s too early for anything heavy. He’s barefoot, still in his T-shirt and sleep pants, a mug of coffee in one hand and a newspaper tucked under his arm.

His eyes flick between you and Joel. The smile falters, just a hair.

“Joel?” He says, blinking. Then back to you. “You’re with her?”

Joel nods once. Quiet. “Hey, Mike.”

Your dad hesitates—but only for a breath. Then he steps back slowly, still watching the two of you like he’s trying to solve a puzzle with only half the pieces. He waves you in anyway.

“Come on in. Coffee’s fresh.”

The door clicks shut behind you with a final-sounding thud.

You follow him inside, every footstep sounding louder than it should. Joel stays close behind, his hand brushing yours like he can’t help it—even now, even here. You don’t look at him. Not yet.

You step into the living room like it’s the last time you’ll ever see it exactly this way—unchanged, safe, familiar. The couch you grew up on. The crooked photos in the hall. The faint scent of laundry detergent and leftover coffee and something warmer you can’t name.

Joel hovers behind you, quiet. Not fidgeting, not nervous—but held still by something heavier. He hasn’t said a word.

Your dad moves into the kitchen, setting his mug down with a clink before turning slightly, watching the two of you over his shoulder.

“You two carpoolin’ now or somethin’?” he asks, trying for light, but there’s a thread of confusion woven through it.

You can’t lie. Not today.

You shake your head once. “We came to talk.”

That gets his attention.

He straightens, blinking at you both like he’s waiting for the punchline. “Everything okay?”

Joel’s voice is quiet. Steady. “We just need a few minutes of your time.”

Your dad narrows his eyes—not angry, not yet. Just… off-balance. Guarded. “Alright…” He jerks his chin toward the living room. “Let’s sit.”

He walks first. You follow second. Joel follows last.

Already, you feel it—that subtle shift in the air. Like the house knows something you haven’t said yet. Like the walls are listening.

He shuffles toward the kitchen again, calling over his shoulder as he moves, “You guys eat yet?”

You glance at Joel—at the man who still hasn’t said a word since you stepped inside—and then call out, “We’re good, Dad. Thanks.”

“Suit yourselves.”

He’s humming now. Something soft and tuneless. You hear the cabinet open, the scrape of his mug being set down again, the clink of the coffee pot. Everything is so normal. So painfully, dreadfully normal.

Joel shifts beside you, leans close enough to murmur, “You wanna wait, or…?”

Your stomach flips.

“No,” you whisper. “We tell him. Just… let him sit down first.”

Joel gives a tight nod, his fingers brushing yours again, quick and fleeting.

Your dad returns a minute later, fresh coffee in hand, newspaper folded beneath his arm. He sinks into his usual chair—the one that groans under his weight, the one no one else dares sit in—and leans back with a sigh.

He looks at you first.

Then Joel.

Then back again.

“What’s got you both lookin’ like you just ran over somebody’s dog?”

You try to laugh. It comes out too sharp, too thin.

He raises an eyebrow. “What’s goin’ on?”

Then his face hardens—not with understanding, but with something more hesitant. More off.

“Didn’t think you two spent much time together,” he says slowly. His voice is still casual, but there’s something behind it now—something cautious. “Figured it was one of your friends makin’ you sneak out all the time.”

He chuckles once. It’s dry. Strained. “Sure as hell didn’t think it was Joel.”

Silence.

Thick. Heavy. Choking.

Your dad’s eyes narrow just slightly. He looks at Joel now—really looks at him. And you can see the pieces beginning to shift behind his eyes. One by one. Every memory. Every absence. Every little thing he didn’t question before.

He laughs again. But it’s empty this time.

“No,” he says flatly. “No, I don’t wanna hear it.”

“Dad—”

“No.” His voice is louder now. Sharper. “You’re tellin’ me this’s been goin’ on behind my back? You and him?”

You flinch. Joel stays still. Tense. Silent.

Your father stands, coffee forgotten on the side table, paper sliding off his lap.

“You’ve been lyin’ to me. Both of you.” He looks at Joel, betrayal breaking clean across his face. “You were supposed to be my friend.”

You open your mouth. Try to speak.

But Joel steps in first—just a little. Not enough to crowd. Not enough to scare.

But enough to stand beside you. Steady. Certain. “Mike,” he says, low and careful. “Let us explain.”

Your dad stares at Joel like he doesn’t recognize him. Like the man standing in front of him—the one he’s known for years, trusted with goddamn everything—is a stranger wearing Joel’s face.

“Explain?” He repeats, voice low and tight. “You want to explain?”

Joel doesn’t flinch. “We didn’t plan it this way.”

“Plan it?” Your dad’s voice breaks, somewhere between disbelief and rising anger. “Jesus Christ, Joel, she’s my daughter. You think that justifies it? That you didn’t plan it?”

You step forward, heart pounding. “It’s not what you think—”

He cuts his hand through the air, eyes blazing. “Don’t. Don’t tell me this is anything but betrayal. From both of you.”

Joel’s jaw tightens. “It wasn’t like that.”

Your dad rounds on him. “Then how was it? Huh?” His voice is raw now, sharp. “You just woke up one day and thought, yeah, let me fuck around with Mike’s daughter behind his back? Sneak around like some goddamn teenager?”

“Hey.” Joel’s voice finally cracks through, firmer. “That’s not what this is. I care about her. You know I do.”

Your dad laughs once. Bitter. Disbelieving. “You care? That’s what you’re going with?”

You can barely breathe. You feel the shame hot on your skin, the panic twisting deep in your chest.

“Dad, please—”

“Don’t,” he snaps. “You think this doesn’t gut me? You think I don’t sit here feelin’ like an idiot? My best friend and my kid—”

Joel steps forward, tone even. “I would never hurt her, and I sure as hell don’t wanna hurt you.”

“That’s the fuckin’ point, Joel!” Your dad yells. “You already did! You both did.”

Silence falls—heavy and vibrating with tension.

Your dad turns his back. Paces. Runs a hand through his hair. And then, quieter, voice cracking: “I trusted you. Both of you.”

Joel doesn’t speak. Doesn’t move.

You do.

You step forward, voice soft but steady. “It wasn’t meant to happen like this. But it’s not a fling. It’s not a mistake. I love him.”

Your dad’s shoulders tighten.

Joel breathes in deep, like the words settle in his bones.

And when your dad turns again, there’s no disbelief left—just hurt. Real and bare. “I need some time,” he says finally. “I need you both to go.”

The words hang in the air like smoke.

I need you both to go.

You freeze, mouth half open. “Dad—”

“Go.”

He doesn’t yell this time. Doesn’t bark or snap. But it’s worse that way. Worse because it’s flat. Final. Said with the kind of hollow certainty that doesn’t need to be loud to be devastating.

Joel shifts beside you. “Mike…”

Your dad doesn’t look at him. Doesn’t look at either of you.

He stares at a spot just left of the couch, like if he keeps his eyes on anything else—anything but you—he might be able to keep from breaking.

“Don’t make me say it again.”

And for a second—just a breath—you almost fight. Almost tell him that you’re not a child anymore, that you don’t need permission to feel the way you do. That you’re happy, maybe for the first time in your life.

But you don’t.

Because he’s still your dad.

Because he’s right.

You lied to him. Both of you did.

Joel’s voice is quiet when he says, “Come on.”

You don’t look back as you follow him to the door. Your feet feel numb. Your heart feels worse.

The silence stretches behind you like a wound.

You step onto the porch. Joel shuts the door gently behind you, like closing it soft might make it hurt less.

But it doesn’t.

Not even close.

The morning air is too bright, too clean. The world feels wrong in the way it keeps moving—birds singing, cars passing on the street, nothing stopping just because your chest feels split wide open.

Joel walks you to the truck, but he doesn’t touch you. Not yet.

Once you’re inside, seatbelt fastened with shaking hands, he exhales slowly—like he’s been holding his breath since the moment your dad opened the door.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper. Your voice is small. Barely there. “I shouldn’t have—”

Joel cuts you off, not harsh, just firm.

“No,” he says. “Don’t.”

You look at him. Really look at him.

He’s pale. Sweating. His hand trembles faintly against the steering wheel like it hurts to keep still. But his jaw is set. His eyes are dark with something deeper than guilt.

“He’ll come around,” Joel murmurs, though you can’t tell if he believes it or if he just needs you to.

You nod. Because you have to.

Because the only thing worse than what just happened… is the thought that it could undo all of this.

━━━✵━━━━━━✵━━━━━━✵━━━━━━✵━

The first two weeks were good.

Not perfect. Not easy. But good in a way that made you start to believe maybe it could last.

You stayed with Joel. Slept in his bed, wore his old shirts, woke up with his hand already on your waist like his body didn’t know how to let go. He made you coffee every morning, cooked dinner every night—real meals, too. Not just quick shit. The man slow-roasted vegetables. Seared steak like he’d been born doing it. He kissed your shoulder while you washed your hair. Held your hand on the couch. Smiled more.

It wasn’t always soft—sometimes it was messy, sometimes quiet—but he tried. Harder than he ever had before. Like he was making up for all the time you’d spent hiding. All the guilt. All the fear. You could feel him working at it, even when he didn’t say much.

And for a while, it worked.

You laughed. Ate better. Stopped checking your phone every time it buzzed, afraid it was your dad, saying the worst had finally come.

But then Joel started to pull away.

It was subtle at first. Long pauses between conversations. Nights where he’d sit out on the porch too long with a beer, staring at nothing. You’d touch his arm and he’d flinch—not away from you, but like he was startled. Like he’d forgotten you were there. Like he’d been somewhere else entirely.

When you asked what was wrong, he said nothing.

When you asked again, he kissed you too hard and pressed you into the mattress like he could convince you with his body instead of his words.

You should’ve known.

He picked the fight the next morning.

Over something small—something about the dishes, maybe, or you staying past the weekend. Something dumb enough that you almost laughed. But Joel didn’t laugh. He didn’t even look at you. Just stood by the kitchen counter with his jaw clenched, arms crossed, saying words that didn’t sound like his.

He said maybe you should take a break.

Said maybe you needed time to patch things up with your dad.

Said maybe he’d made a mistake.

But you saw it—clear as day. In his face. In the way he stood like he was bracing for something awful. He was lying. Not about how he felt—but about why. He thought pushing you away would fix it. That if you hated him, maybe your dad would forgive you. Maybe things could go back to normal.

So you left.

Packed what little you had, still crying, too angry to speak. Joel didn’t stop you. Didn’t follow you. Just stood there with his hands in his pockets, watching the door like it was some punishment he deserved.

You went home.

Your dad didn’t ask questions when he opened the door. Didn’t yell, didn’t gloat. Just stepped aside and let you in. You walked past him, dropped your bag in the hallway, and shut yourself in your room without a word.

He didn’t come in. Not that night. Not the next one either.

He let you stay.

That was all.

⁂

Time passed.

Not quickly. Not gently. But it passed.

You stopped texting Joel. Stopped checking to see if he had texted you back. At first out of pride. Then out of pain. Then because you couldn’t bring yourself to open the thread. Couldn’t stand to see his name sitting there, untouched, like a bruise you kept pressing just to prove it still hurt.

Your dad didn’t bring him up. Not once. Not even when you passed each other in the hallway. Not when he made dinner for two but only ate one plate. Not when you sat beside him on the couch but didn’t speak, didn’t laugh, didn’t look like the daughter he knew.

He didn’t ask if you were okay, but he also didn’t ignore it.

Not really.

He started to notice things.

The way you didn’t go out anymore. Didn’t see your friends. The way you pushed food around on your plate and took your dishes to the sink half-full. How you stayed curled up on the couch long after the TV had gone dark, long after he’d gone to bed.

He noticed the crying, too.

You tried to be quiet. Covered your mouth, turned your face into the pillow. But the walls weren’t that thick. And the silence between you had become a living thing—heavy, breathing, always listening.

One night, he stopped in the hallway. You didn’t hear him at first—just felt the way the floorboards creaked under his weight, how the air shifted near your door. He didn’t knock. Didn’t open it.

But he stood there for a long time.

Just stood there, while you bit your lip and let the tears roll silently down your cheek, hoping the weight of him outside the room meant something was still left between you. That he still cared. That maybe he just didn’t know how to fix it.

Neither did you.

⁂

It starts small, deliberate.

A mug set down beside yours at the table. A fork pushed toward you with a quiet, “Eat.”

He doesn’t say much at first. Doesn’t press.

You pick at your food like always—slow, mechanical, dragging your fork through syrup that’s already gone cold. He watches you across the table, hands wrapped around his own mug like it’s the only thing tethering him to the moment.

“I was thinkin’ about takin’ the boat out this weekend,” he says casually, eyes on his coffee. “Could use the company. Not as fun drinkin’ beer alone on the water.”

You don’t look up. “Maybe.”

He doesn’t push–just nods. Swallows it down.

The silence stretches. Long and uncomfortable. You stare at your plate like it might swallow you back if you sit still long enough.

Then he tries again. “You sleep okay?”

You nod.

“Yeah.”

He doesn’t believe you. You both know it. But he nods anyway, pretending to accept it—pretending he didn’t hear you crying last night. Or the night before that. Or every night since.

“You been talkin’ to anyone?” He asks gently. “Your friends? That girl with the red Jeep—what’s her name?”

“Jess.”

“Yeah. Jess.”

You shake your head. “Haven’t really felt like it.”

Your dad shifts in his chair. Rubs a hand over his jaw. Looks older today. Tired. “You know you can talk to me, right?”

You finally glance up.

The look in his eyes nearly breaks you. Not angry. Not disappointed.

Just… lost.

“I’m fine,” you say. It comes out flat. Unconvincing, but he nods anyway.

“Alright.”

He doesn’t believe you. He’s trying not to let it show. Trying to reach you without making you run.

But when he stands to clear the plates, you see the weight in his shoulders. The way he pauses at the sink—quiet, thoughtful—like he’s already halfway to making a decision he hasn’t told you about yet.

⁂

You’re outside when it happens.

Wrapped in a sweatshirt too big for you—one that still smells like sawdust and cedar and Joel’s damn soap. You shouldn’t be wearing it. Should’ve stuffed it in the bottom of your drawer the moment he left. But it’s the only thing that’s felt warm these past few weeks, the only thing that hasn’t asked you to explain.

You’re curled up in the corner of the porch swing, knees tucked into your chest, eyes unfocused as the late afternoon light drapes gold across the yard.

You don’t hear the truck. Don’t notice the front door open, or the footsteps across the porch boards. Not until—

“Hi, darlin’.”

Your heart stutters.

You look up too fast.

He’s standing a few feet away, hands in the pockets of his jeans, boots scuffed like he never stopped moving after that night. There’s a hollow behind his eyes. His face is drawn, unshaven. He looks like he hasn’t been sleeping either.

Like he hasn’t been breathing right without you.

You don’t speak.

The porch swing groans beneath your weight, the night air thick with humidity and the distant hum of crickets. You keep your legs pulled to your chest, arms wrapped tight around your knees, drowning in the oversized, faded navy sweatshirt that was soft from too many washes.

Joel sits beside you. Not too close. Not far either. Elbows on his knees, hands clenched, head bowed like he’s waiting for a verdict.

Neither of you says anything.

The silence stretches. Long. Awkward. Familiar in the worst kind of way.

You keep your eyes forward. On the edge of the yard. On the dark tree line beyond it. On anything but him.

He doesn’t look at you either.

And still—you feel him. The weight of him next to you. The guilt rolling off his shoulders like smoke.

You break first.

“You didn’t even fight me on it.”

Your voice is quiet. Flat.

Joel’s jaw flexes.

“You made me think you didn’t care.”

Still, he doesn’t look at you.

Didn’t have to. You can feel the ache moving through him, the same ache that’s been living in your chest since that night. The one that cracked open when he raised his voice. When he said maybe you should go. When he didn’t come after you once you turned your back.

Joel’s voice is low when he finally speaks. Rough. Like it costs him.

“I thought it’d be better for you.”

You laugh. Bitter and tired. “You thought pushing me out would help?”

“I thought maybe if I was the one to break it,” he says, eyes still on the floorboards, “maybe you and your dad could put it back together.”

That’s what shatters you.

Not the fight. Not even the silence after.

But that.

Because even now—even now—he’s still trying to save you from the mess he made.

You blink hard.

“Joel—”

He cuts you off gently. Finally meets your eyes. “I’m sorry, darlin’.”

The words aren’t pretty. Not dressed up. Just true.

And they ruin you.

⁂

Your dad doesn’t say much at first.

Not after Joel showed up that night, standing on the porch like the weight of the world had finally broken him down. Not after you folded the second he said “Hi, darlin’”—barely more than a whisper—and collapsed into his arms right there on the steps. Not after he sat beside you without speaking, just staying, like that was the only way he knew how to ask for forgiveness.

And not after your dad let him.

Because he didn’t say much then, either.

Now, days later, the worst of it has passed—but only in the way a storm moves through. There’s still water pooled in the aftermath. Still wreckage in the corners.

You’re already on the porch when your dad steps outside. The sun’s low, brushing amber against the grass, and the old hoodie hanging from your frame is one of Joel’s—left behind in a moment of weakness or maybe given on purpose. You haven’t taken it off.

He settles next to you with a quiet groan, the boards creaking under his weight. There’s a pause. He doesn’t speak, just exhales hard through his nose, like he’s been carrying something for too long and still doesn’t know how to set it down.

Then he says, not looking at you, not even really to you—just out into the yard:

“Y’know I was gonna ask him to help with that busted drawer again this week.”

Your heart jumps.

He doesn’t need to say Joel’s name. Doesn’t need to explain who him is. The meaning is already in the silence between his words.

He taps his thumb against his coffee mug. “Could still use the help.”

You don’t answer right away. Don’t even know if he’s really saying it to you. But your hands are clenched around your knees, and you can feel the pulse rising to your throat.

So you just nod. Barely.

Your dad shifts beside you, takes a sip, then mutters, “He looked like shit when he showed up.”

You let out a breath. Almost a laugh. “He wasn’t the only one.”

“Yeah,” he says, almost softer than the breeze. “I know.”

For a while, you just sit there. No big resolution. No sweeping, emotional reunion. But something loosens in your chest, anyway. Something tired and hopeful and trying.

It’s not forgiveness.

But it’s a start.

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right4you · 1 month ago

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strangers masterlist

pairing: dark!serial killer!joel x f!reader

summary: after you run away from home, you meet a handsome stranger who offers you a ride, a meal, and a bed. but you know what they say—don’t talk to strangers, or you might fall in love. and this particular stranger has a very dark secret, one you might not be able to escape the consequences of discovering.

overall warnings (please also see individual chapter warnings): 18+, smut, DDDNE, age gap (reader is college-aged, joel is mid-50s), no outbreak au, no use of y/n, graphic talk of death/murder and blood, mommy & daddy issues, brief talk of domestic violence, lying, gaslighting, coercion, manipulation, f-receiving non-con groping/breathplay/fingering/sex, being held captive, degrading language toward victims/victim blaming, joel is implied to fantasize that you're dead while fucking you, development of stockholm syndrome, pet names (baby, darlin', sweetheart, babydoll, etc), some joel pov, no ellie/sarah but tommy has an unnamed daughter, somewhat inspired by "preacher's daughter" by ethel cain, vaguely set in the 70s/80s

read it on ao3

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

part 5

EXTRAS

babydoll's letter

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right4you · 1 month ago

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My eternal love.

From pascal.pedrito on instagram

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right4you · 1 month ago

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this is what waking up to JOEL MILLER looks like btw he freaks out if u get up before him until only time & vulnerable reassurance convinces him ur never leaving him..theyre putting me back in my padded cell bye

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right4you · 1 month ago

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The right side of my neck

pairing: Joel Miller x F!reader

summary: You never meant to end up alone with the patroller, but two nights, snowed in between silence and shared space, leave you both with a bond too fragile to name and very dangerous to keep.

tags: age gap (30-56), grief, death, mention of suicide, alcohol.

w/c: 3.1k

notes: you'll hate me for this, i know

edit: part 2!

“So, by protocol, we’re gonna start sending a nurse on every patrol” María says from behind her desk, her momma-warm voice filling the silent office… smelling like incense and baby powder for some reason.

“I don’t carry guns.”

Silence. María moves some stuff through the desk, rummage through some papers with names.

“Ain’t necessary you use one” she assures you. “Might wanna keep a knife on you, just in case, but if you don’t wanna use firearms, we won’t force you. You can when you’re ready, but for now it ain’t needed.” She writes your name on the patrol roster, stamps it, and hands you a slip of paper.

“This here’s your assigned partner for tomorrow morning. You’ll find him at the stable” she says as you read: Joel Miller. Rancher St. “Here’s his address if you wanna stop by and meet him beforehand.”

You slip the paper into your scrub pocket and look at her.

“What if someone tries to hurt me out there?” you ask.

“That ain’t gonna happen. Joel’s…” María trails off for a second, thinking through her words. “He’s alert. Real alert. Before anything touches you, it’s gotta get through him first. But you know, if you wanna feel safer you can—”

“I’m not carrying a gun” you cut in.

“Good.” She nods. Not tired, you can feel the understanding in her voice. “Pack yourself a bag with food, warm clothes, a lighter, first-aid kit, water, etc.” She stands and opens the door.

“Good luck tomorrow. Let me know how it goes.”

Walking out of City Hall, you head straight home. Doesn’t strike you to go meet your new partner. Why bother? Just to stare at each other?

The thought of stepping outside again after so long makes every inch of you tremble. Freezes your marrow. Once, you were a wild creature and the outdoors was your playground… but those instincts got lost. Now, you feel like the world outside will eat you alive.

And maybe it will.

The new patrol policy is kinda rough, but it means more supplies and maybe a few privileges.

“Hey, I’m the one keeping your ass safe! Give me that last bag of coffee!” Sounds good.

Your bag’s a bit heavy. Maybe because you rolled around in bed more than you slept. Still, you reach the stable and see him. Joel’s brushing his horse like it’s showtime, whispering to it as he strokes its neck—tender.

“Hey” you say, no frills, standing on the other side of the fence. “You Joel?”

He turns, looks at you for a second, then glances away.

“Roll out in fifteen. Grab a horse and sign in” he says, returning to the horse and stuffing a few things into his bag and adjusting the girth.

His demeanor irks you at first: no hello, no eye contact. You shrug and head to the end of the stable, find the sign-in sheet with a pencil dangling on a string. You jot your name beneath his.

“Which one’re you taking?” Joel asks, leading the horse out by its reins.

“This one’s available…” you read off the board: “Shimmer.”

“No, leave that one in.”

“But I need—”

“You ride mine. Easier that way. If I gotta wait on you, we ain’t gettin’ back.”

A silence settles. You watch him settle the last few things on his horse. The jab stings. He turns his head and meets your eyes.

“Get on the horse.” He gestures you to the animal. You glance at it and then back at him. Joel closes his eyes, massages the bridge of his nose and sighs heavy. “Come ‘ere”

He makes you stand fancing the side of the horse and suddenly you're in the air. A small sound blurt past your lips but you keep it in by clamping your lips shut. Your hands go to the horn of the saddle, his strong and large hand grasp you by the hips over your jeans, when you set your foot inside the stirrup, his hands go unannounced straight to your ass, pushing you up.

Once you're sat, your eyes go briefly to his. Not staring much. You're probably beet red.

The ride’s quiet. Like you’ve both silently agreed you don’t wanna know much about each other. Your arms around his waist over his coat, it’s alright. The landscape stuns you, the sun reflecting off the snow like in a dream. Jackson’s mountains look even more intimidating close-up.

“Ain’t we going too far?” you ask over the wind.

He glances back. Doesn’t answer right away.

“You never been assigned a long route before? You think they’d send a nurse on a thirty-minute patrol? They only send someone if it’s risky.” He speaks as he guides the horse across a little stone bridge over a frozen river.

“I’ve never done a route.”

Silence.

“Well. This will be your first.”

The blizzard bites your skin, snow flicking your cheeks. You close your eyes, lean into his back, taking refuge from the wind’s assault.

A grunt rumbles in his chest.

“We gotta stop. Storm’s comin’ in,” Joel says, voice louder to fight the storm’s howl.

Soon you’re standing in front of a worn sign: “Jackson Hole Golf & Tennis Club.” Following a trail, you find a small cabin. He helps you down with a tug so abrupt it nearly throws you off balance. You give him a sharp look he doesn’t notice as he hands you the bags and gestures toward the door. After a moment, he steps inside after you.

“Where’d you leave it?” you ask as he sets his rifle on a desk and pulls a flashlight from his bag.

“What?” He’s matter-of-fact, not looking your way.

“The horse.”

“He’s got a back room. I’ve spent nights here before in the same kinda mess” he says, handing you the flashlight. Through the windows, nothing but white, daylight storm in full force.

“How long we stay here?” you ask, stammering as you turn toward the window.

“Could be two hours. Could be a day.” He draws the curtains and closes them. “Unpredictable.”

You nod, sinking into one of the chairs in the small living area.

“I brought water, some cans of food, extra matches…” You plop your backpack on your knees and start unpacking.

“Yeah, what everyone should carry when they patrol,” he mutters, pulling a small single-burner stove from his bag and lighting it on the floor. “Next time, bring a lighter, not matches. Snow melts and ruins ‘em.”

You nod again. Accept wisdom from someone who’s been around.

Afternoon rolls in silence. The cabin creaks as wind tosses around it. Joel fiddles with the radio, scanning through static. No signal, storm’s blocked it.

“I’m gonna check the horse” he whispers, getting up with a tired groan. He tries the cabin door. It won’t budge. He peers through the peephole. Only darkness. “Dammit, the snow… Shit.” He clicks his radio on his belt.

“Jackson, do you copy? Amy, do you copy?” he repeats, voice tense all afternoon.

“It’s almost six PM. They can answer, but we ain’t goin’ no place tonight. Rescue teams roll out at six AM.” Joel sets the radio on the desk and sinks into a chair, rubbing his forehead.

“We could cook something” you say, knees brushing the floor as you grab a can of chickpeas in tomato sauce and set it on the burner. “Something hot in the belly, the night’ll pass easy.” He’s staring at the cans now.

“How we divide the night watch?” you ask.

“I got it. You ain’t got a gun, and I’m sure you don’t know how to handle one” he says, lifting the rifle from the wall, then grabs a cloth from his pocket and wipes the barrel.

“Aren’t you gonna sleep?” you ask, arching your brow. “The door’s buried in snow, ain’t nothing getting in.”

He stares for a long beat, raises both eyebrows.

“All right. Fine.” You turn away and focus on the cans. “Just saying, if infected came calling, you ain’t doin’ much.”

“Infected? There’s things out there way worse than a bite. Worse for folk like you.” He studies you, wondering if you’re naive, or stupid. Maybe both. Or maybe you just prefer ignoring danger.

“How long since you haven't been out there?” he asks after a long look. Your hands, your sweater, your tired braid.

“Couple years” you murmur. “Been in Jackson for three years. Since I walked through Jackson’s gate, I never went back outside. I told María I ain’t goin’. I got good at everything inside, became indispensable.”

“You saying patrollers are disposable?” he frowns.

You meet his gaze, steeled a bit.

“No. I mean everyone’s indispensable for somethin’. You’re indispensable on patrols. I’m indispensable at the clinic.”

“Apparently not that indispensable, ‘cause they still sent you out here without a gun.”

Silence.

Your eyes go back to the open cans.

He swallows hard. He knows he stepped on a nerve.

“But they sent you with me. Means they knew you’re safe with me.” he remarks, setting the rifle aside.

You take a can with a rag around it, careful not to burn yourself, and hand it to him. He takes it. Doesn’t say thanks. Just nods.

You eat in silence.

Night comes, and you start nodding off, arms crossed, knees to your chest, coat over your legs. He watches you from his spot, stares at your form that expects nothing. Never does, never asks for anything.

There's a poor drop of sweat falling down your temple. Gladly you got to make some warmth in that little corner, Joel's wonders if you have layers and layers of other clothes beneath the one's he can see. Why is he so cold? Why aren't you?

The idea is erased by the memory of what he did this morning. He meant to push you up by thighs, not by your fucking ass but he slipped. He still has the feeling impregnated in his hands. He swears he felt the warmth of your skin seep through the denim that he squeezed.

Joel closes his eyes taking a slow deep breath.

He saw you before. At the clinic, strolling around, staying beside the ill. Going home, sometimes crying because you've lost somebody, sometimes with a neutral expression.

You're another townfolk. Another someone. Everyone has been for years to him. No one more than his family lights that protective side in his chest.

But you're slowly moving something in him. And he can't let it happen.

Joel rises and gently touches your shoulder.

“Help me move that cot from the bedroom. You’ll be more comfortable” he says softly, not wanting to interrupt your drifting rest by alarming you.

You follow him down the narrow hallway and into a cold, dark room. He takes one end of the cot and you the other, carrying it back into the living room. Then he fetches the mattress.

“I got some blankets. You got more, right?” he grabs two rolled-up blankets from his bag.

“I’m here with mine. Keep yours, you’ll freeze on that chair otherwise.”

Joel watches you crawl into the cot, curling around yourself under both blankets. After a few minutes, he hears your soft breathing, you’re asleep.

Static crackles from the radio and wakes you in the morning. You turn and see him, collapsed on the sofa, forehead against the radio, thumb gripping the volume as he naps. Rifle resting on his lap. He snores softly, almost hidden.

You notice two blankets draped over you. You sigh and rise quietly. That's why you're sweating then, you think. You move over and cover his back and legs with them. After a couple hours, Joel wakes.

“What’re you doin’?” Joel asks, confused, squinting at the clear morning light as you warm a chickpea can on the stove.

“Warming up food” you mumble, tilting your head, unable to hide the soft rhythm in your voice.

“No. Why the hell didn’t you wake me?” he grumbles, pulling the blankets off and suddenly looking at you. “You wanna get us killed?”

“...They didn’t kill us” you chirp, narrowing your eyes a bit, regretting that response.

“I’m aware. But anything could’ve gone down in a millisecond and you wouldn’t’ve woken me. Got that little survival instinct? Did nobody teach you? How’d you survive before Jackson?” he snaps.

Silence.

“I just wanted you to sleep. You looked worn out.”

Joel breathes heavily. Rubs his hands over his face and shakes his head.

“I don’t need sleep. I need us to stay alive.”

“Sorry” you murmur.

Joel blinks, surprised at your words. “Don’t apologize. Just say you get it.”

“Got it. I’ll wake you next time.” You meet his gaze and sound steady, and he notices. A flicker of fear. It makes his stomach turn water.

Afternoon finds the storm raging still. Door won’t budge, radio’s out again. You’re rationing water and gas like it’s the last on Earth. Joel’s in the spare bedroom where you moved the cot, breaking up old furniture into firewood for the chimney you both sort of cleaned in the living room.

While you’re sniffing through drawers in the cabin, you find an old photo album, pictures of a family. You settle at the desk and flip through, imagining the story behind each.

“When Tommy and I found this spot, there was some guy dead in here—gunshot to the head. Lost everything, gave up,” Joel says from behind your chair. “This shit can drive you nuts.”

He tosses the sticks into the chimney.

“I don’t think it drives you nuts” your eyes stay on the photos: a baby on a woman’s lap, a man smiling wide. “One day you got it all, and then... boom, the universe yanks it away. Not everyone can live with that memory flash in their head. Some follow those eyes anywhere they go.”

He’s quiet. Takes a seat across from you, arms crossed, watching the chimney. Reaches for a sip of whisky from his flask, splashes wood with it, lights the fire, closes the cap from the flask.

“I tried following those eyes,” he whispers. “But I couldn’t. She was fourteen that night… she died in my arms.”

Silence.

No “I’m sorry”, you know he’s sick of hearing it.

“It’s a pain that never quits.” You close the album, set it on the desk. “It’s… cruel, right? Something so familiar just disappears.”

Joel watches you.

“You don’t know where to look. You get mad at everything… The sun, the wind, anything. And then you feel a burst of happiness you think means you’ve accepted it. Then you wake up and remember. They’re gone.” You shrug, and meet him. His eyes hold that same familiar, recognized grief.

“It comes in waves” he says.

“Yeah. Never really goes away.”

Silence.

“Who?” he asks. It is understood.

“A lot of people.”

He gets it, even if it’s vague. Feels resentful for asking. Doesn’t want to show his own bottomed-out softness.

The radio clicks.

“Miller, do you copy?” Amy’s voice crackles.

“Miller here. We’re stuck in the cabin at Cottonwood St., the Golf Club” he replies.

“Copy that. Security station north. Rescue crew’ll be sent first thing tomorrow. Hold tight."

With luck, this’ll be the last night.

As the sun sets, the temperature drops lower than the night before. Both of you sit by the fire, on the cot, warming your hands.

“It’s funny,” you murmur, chin resting on your knees, eyes fixed on the fire “how quick a person can get used to comfort after livin’ so long like this, huh?” You glance over at him. His profile, that hawkish nose, his graying hair, eyes reflecting the flames.

“Never got used to it, to be honest. Feels like if I start takin’ it for granted, it’s all gonna fall to shit” he says low, arms crossed, shoulders hunched.

You look at him for another moment, then turn back to the fire.

“I think I spent so long just runnin’ that the only goal I had was makin’ it here. A safe place. The... sort of silence.” You shrug. “I think if somethin’ happened to me after this, I wouldn’t mind much."

He finally looks at you.

“It’d just mean I got somethin’ good to tell those eyes when I see ’em again” you whisper. When you turn your head again, you see it… a flicker in those tired eyes, the shimmer of tears he won’t let fall.

Joel stands and heads into the other room, the same one you both got the cot from. You don’t hear him for a couple of hours. You stop feeding the fire because the wood’s gone.

You crawl under the blankets, arms wrapped around yourself, backpack tucked under your head like a pillow. After a while, you hear him come back.

“Mind if I lie down? I’m real tired. Don’t think I got it in me tonight,” he says and it doesn’t sound like he’s just talking about sleep. Feels like he’s saying he wants to stop everything. The world. Life.

You nod, lift the blanket, and he climbs in beside you. Face to face. He exhales, the cold seeping into him, his hands clenched tight to his chest.

Your hands reach for his, guide them around your body. He doesn’t pull away. His eyes search yours in the low light, barely lit by the dying embers.

“Could we actually freeze to death in here?” you ask softly, like a secret.

“Probably... if we hadn’t gone through the wood like it was endless.”

You let out a quiet laugh, tucking yourself into the crook of his shoulder. A few minutes pass. Then you feel it, the damp of a tear soaking the neck of your shirt, your skin. Then a quiet sniff. His body trembles. His arms tighten around you. He clings to you. Your hands run over his nape, scratching gently, running your fingers through his hair, holding him close.

In the morning, they finally manage to clear the door. Jesse smiles at Joel once he pushes the door open, shovel in hand. Tommy gives Joel that usual brother-hug, then Jesse walks over to you and kindly takes your backpack.

Outside, two more patrollers are tending to the horse they pulled from the garage.

“Shall we? I’ll take you back. Tommy’s stayin’ with the rest, they gotta deal with the horse and a few other things.” Jesse looks at you as he ties your bag to the saddle. Your eyes drift past his shoulder. Joel, talkin’ to Tommy, arms crossed, face unreadable.

“You alright?” Jesse asks, frowning a little at how far away your gaze has gone. You snap back to him.

“Yeah. Let’s go.”

Jesse climbs on his horse, then reaches out to help you up. Once you’re settled, you glance back as Jesse starts the ride toward Jackson.

And Joel doesn’t look back.

hey! so this was inspired in a tweet i saw a while ago:

it's kind of short and i made it my way. it hurt me a bit to write this, idk why, I'm kind of sensitive today. anyway. I have a smut version in drafts soooo if you'd like me to also post that one, leave a comment!

thanks again for every repost, like and comment. it makes a writer really really happy on this side of the screen.

kisses!

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right4you · 2 months ago

Text

soft comfort

pairings joel miller x sunshine!reader

summary joel never liked his name until he heard it from your lips.

“that’s how i know i’m home—hear you sayin’ my name. say it again tomorrow… and the day after that… every day, baby. for the rest of my life.”

content established relationship, unspecified age gap, fluff, emotional intimacy, soft romance, quiet domestic moments, joel being soft, protective, and tender. slight angst & emotional vulnerability, gentle comfort after emotional weight, themes of healing and safety in love.

masterlist

you say his name different than everyone else. softer. safer.

he never tells you that but every time you say it, he answers like he’s hearing it for the first time.

that night, it’s late when you finally climb into bed.

joel’s already there, one arm behind his head, eyes half-lidded and heavy. the window’s cracked, letting in the hush of wind.

the room is warm. so is he.

you slide beneath the covers, nestle into the space where his body’s already sunk into the mattress. he turns toward you instantly with his one arm wraps around your waist, pulling you in without a word.

your cheek finds his chest. his hand finds the curve of your spine.

neither of you speaks for a while.

“joel?”

your voice is quiet, breath brushing the fabric of his sleep shirt, warm over his heart.

he answers like he always does.

“yeah, baby?”

just hearing that melts something inside you. that little rasp in his voice, that southern drag that softens only for you. it’s not exhaustion. it’s trust. you know how hard that was for him.

you don’t follow it with a question. you just needed to say his name.

you like the way he sounds when he says yours back.

joel shifts a little, burying his face into your hair. “everything alright?”

“mhm,” you murmur. “just… like sayin’ it sometimes.”

that makes him go still for a moment. the kind of still that means his heart’s doing something complicated he doesn’t quite have the words for.

you hear him swallow.

“never liked my name 'til you said it.”

you smile.

“you’re serious?”

“dead serious,” he replies. “always thought it sounded too rough. too… hard.” he exhales through his nose, almost like a laugh.

“but when you say it… it sounds like somethin’ worth answerin’ to.”

the quiet wraps around you like a blanket.

you lift your head slightly, looking at him. he’s watching you with that expression like he’s still not used to being looked at like this. like he doesn’t understand how someone so beautiful like you can look at him that way.

so you say it again, soft and sweet.

“joel.”

his hand tightens on your waist.

you lean in, press a kiss just over his lips. “that name sounds like home to me.”

his chest rises sharply.

and then he whispers your name.

just once. like it’s the first time. like he’s tasting it. like he’s holding onto it.

it sounds different from anyone else saying it. not just because it’s deeper, or raspier, or coated in sleep but because it’s him. because it’s joel. and he says it like it’s sacred. like it belongs to him now, too.

you feel your eyes sting.

joel tucks his chin down to look at you better. “what’s wrong?”

you shake your head. “nothing. i just…”

you pause.

“i like the way you say my name.”

his smile is barely there, but it’s real. he kisses your forehead, lips lingering.

“i only ever wanna say it like this,” he says. “soft. close. where no one else gets to hear it.”

you don’t speak after that.

there’s nothing else to say. you and joel just lay there, breathing in sync, and in the quiet, in the dark, in the space between sleep and dreaming you whisper his name once more.

and joel answers like he’s hearing it for the first time.

“that’s how i know i’m home—hear you sayin’ my name. say it again tomorrow… and the day after that… every day, baby. for the rest of my life.”

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right4you · 2 months ago

Note

hii first off, i just wanted to say i love all of ur fics, u r honestly so talented with the way u put so much little details and emotion into ur work.

secondly, i would like to request something with no outbreak joel and reader just had a fun night with her friends that involved some drinking and joel always picks her up from wherever she is and take her home and takes her makeup off and and reader is really clingy and he’s just trying to get her ready for bed.

Drunken nights

Pairing: no-outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader Summary: After a fun night out, you’re tipsy and clingy—and Joel, as always, takes you home and gently takes care of you. Warnings: established relationship, fluff, Joel is being very caring, clingy reader

The night air is warm when you push the door open, laughter still tucked in your chest from the goodbyes you just said. You wobble slightly on the sidewalk, a half-drunken smile playing on your lips as your heels click unevenly against the pavement.

The moment you spot Joel’s truck idling under the dull orange glow of the streetlight, your whole body seems to sigh with relief — like it knows the night isn’t really over until you’re folded into him. He’s always there, always the one to come get you no matter the hour, no matter how tired he is, and even now, as you approach the passenger door, you can see the soft, amused shake of his head when he sees your goofy grin.

You slide into the seat with more enthusiasm than grace, tugging the door shut behind you and immediately leaning across the console. He smells like soap and cedar and the faint ghost of motor oil, and you bury your face into his shoulder like you’ve been missing him for weeks instead of hours.

“You’re so warm,” you murmur into his flannel, your voice slurred at the edges, sticky with wine and exhaustion. Joel hums quietly, one hand resting on your thigh as he begins the short drive home, thumb moving in slow, steady circles over your bare skin.

“Have fun?” he asks, though you’re already halfway through a contented sigh, nodding against him, fingers curling into the soft fabric of his sleeve like you might fall out of the truck if you let go.

“Mmhmm. Missed you, though,” you whisper.

Joel glances at you from the corner of his eye, the edges of his mouth lifting. “You just saw me this morning.”

“I know,” you say, stretching the syllables out dramatically. “It’s been forever.”

He doesn’t argue, just reaches over to tuck your hand into his and squeezes once. You’re quiet the rest of the way home, except for the occasional soft hum of whatever song’s playing low on the radio and your fingers playing gently with his calloused knuckles like it soothes you.

By the time you make it to the house, you’ve melted into something boneless and lazy in your seat, your head rolling toward the window while Joel comes around to open the door for you. He always does that, too — opens doors, holds your coat, walks on the side closest to traffic like it’s instinct. You giggle when he wraps his arm around your waist to steady you, your feet clumsy on the walkway. “You’re strong,” you tell him with a grin, laying your head on his shoulder as you walk.

“Damn right I am,” he mutters, unlocking the front door one-handed while keeping you upright with the other. “And you’re clingy as hell when you’re tipsy.”

You gasp — theatrically — pressing a hand to your chest as he guides you inside. “Am not. I’m just affectionate.”

Joel snorts, kicking the door shut behind him and steering you toward the bedroom. “Sweetheart, you’re hangin’ off me like a koala.”

You don’t deny it. In fact, you lean harder into him, hands sneaking under the hem of his shirt just to feel the warmth of his skin, the soft give of his belly. He grunts softly, but doesn’t stop you — just murmurs something about needing to get you ready for bed and reaches for the zipper on your dress.

The room smells faintly like lavender and laundry detergent, dim and quiet except for the sound of crickets chirping through the open window. Joel’s fingers are gentle as he undresses you, his touch reverent even as you swat playfully at his hands and insist you can do it yourself.

“You’re gonna fall over if I let go,” he says, and you pout but don’t argue, lifting your arms so he can ease the dress over your head.

He disappears into the bathroom for a moment and comes back with a warm washcloth, cupping your chin and tilting your face up toward him. “C’mon,” he says softly. “Let’s get this gunk off you.”

You close your eyes as he wipes away your makeup with careful, unhurried strokes, the rough pads of his thumbs cradling your cheekbones. There’s something sacred in the way he does it — not rushed or distracted, but like it matters to him, like taking care of you is the most natural thing in the world. He knows your face like it’s a map he’s studied for years, eyes tracing over every feature with quiet affection. When he’s done, he presses a kiss to the corner of your mouth, then another to your forehead.

You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him down with a whimpering sound. “Don’t go,” you murmur. “Wanna sleep on you.”

Joel huffs a soft laugh, scooping you up with practiced ease and setting you gently on the bed. He grabs one of his old t-shirts — the one you always steal — and helps you into it while you cling to his wrists like he might vanish if you let go.

“Joel,” you whisper as he tucks the blankets around you, his broad hands smoothing over your hips. “Stay right here. Please.”

“I’m not goin’ anywhere, baby,” he murmurs, toeing off his boots before crawling in beside you. “Just needed to turn the light off.”

You latch onto him the second he settles beside you, arms tight around his middle, legs tangling with his. He’s warm and solid beneath you, his chest rising in slow, steady breaths that lull you deeper into sleep. One of his hands rubs slow circles over your back while the other strokes your hair, over and over until your drunken fog starts to blur into dreams.

“You always take care of me,” you murmur sleepily against his collarbone, your breath soft and damp on his skin.

Joel’s voice is quiet, almost lost in the hush of the room. “Yeah, I do. Always will.”

And with your face tucked into his chest and his heart beating steady beneath your cheek, the world falls away — just the two of you wrapped in the kind of warmth that has nothing to do with temperature. Only love.

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right4you · 2 months ago

Text

“Home sweet home”

No Outbreak!Joel x f!Reader

Joel’s Masterlist

Based on this request

Summary: After losing your home, you have no choice but to move in with your college best friend Sarah… and her ridiculously attractive dad, Joel Miller.

He does his best to keep his feelings at bay—until he catches his brother Tommy flirting with you, jealousy ignites something he can’t suppress anymore.

WC: 10k

Warning/Tags: smut, minors DNI, age gap (joel is 40ish, reader is 21), unprotected piv, oral (f!receiving), masturbation, dirty talk, creampie, aftercare, jealous joel, touch starved joel.

The message from your landlord came while you were scrubbing toothpaste out of your bathroom sink.

Building is getting sold. You have 30 days.

You stared at the screen, heart dropping. It wasn’t a prank. You called him in a panic, and he confirmed it—just as casually cruel as you remembered him being the day you signed the lease.

“You’ll get the paperwork this week. Nothing personal, sweetheart. Just business.”

It felt personal, even if it wasn’t. You’d worked your ass off to afford that shitty little studio near campus. And now? With finals looming and no savings to speak of, you were out of options.

Until Sarah Miller—your best friend, together in every class—called you ten minutes later with a plan.

“Move in with me and my dad.”

“Wait, what?”

“We’ve got space. You’ve seen the house. You’ll have your own room. Come on. It’s perfect.”

“I can’t do that.”

“Oh, come on, why not?”

“Did you even ask your dad first?”

“He won’t say no. Trust me.”

It was a nice house. You’d gone over for Thanksgiving last year when you couldn’t afford the plane ticket home. Suburban, warm, homey. The kind of place that smelled like cedar and lemon wood polish and fresh cornbread in the oven.

And Joel? Well. You didn’t know him well. But you remembered that deep Southern drawl and how he always seemed kind of quiet, brooding in a way that made it hard to tell if he hated having guests or just didn’t know what to say to twenty-year-old girls. Still, he’d pulled your chair out at the table, handed you a full plate, and insisted you take leftovers home.

He was the typical tough Texan dad with an arsenal of dad jokes, a garage full of tools, and arms like he’d never stopped working construction a day in his life. He’d raised her alone since she was little. He was protective. Gruff. A good man, by all accounts. But also a man. A very attractive, older man. And you didn’t trust yourself not to notice that.

You’d tried not to think about it too much at Thanksgiving—the way his voice dipped when he asked if you were warm enough, the way his hand brushed your lower back when he passed behind you at the sink.

You move in on a rainy Thursday, just after your last final. Your life packed in four boxes, two garbage bags, a battered backpack.

Sarah came bounding out the front door before you even reached the sidewalk.

“You made it! Jesus, you really packed light,” she said, grabbing the smallest box from your arms.

You shrugged. “Didn’t have much left after storage and panic donations. Thanks again for this, seriously.”

“Please. Dad’s thrilled. I mean, he grumbled at first, but he always grumbles. That’s how you know he cares.”

She carries one box up the porch steps, then kicks the door open like she owns the place. “Dad? You home?”

Joel appears in the hallway wearing a fitted Henley and jeans that fit too well for a man pushing fifty. His beard was speckled with gray, and the laugh lines around his eyes only made his scowl somehow more handsome. His sleeves are rolled up, dust on his hands like he’s been fixing something. He wipes them on a rag tucked into his back pocket and gives you a once-over, expression unreadable.

There’s a moment where time slows—not because anything dramatic happens, but because something in your chest clenches, tight and hot, when his eyes meet yours.

His gaze lingered on you for a second—just long enough to make your heart do something entirely inappropriate—and then he nodded.

“Thank you for letting me stay, Mr. Miller. I’m terribly sorry for the inconvenience, I’ll try my best not to disturb your routine.”

Joel, in his Texas attitude: “Ain’t no trouble at all, darlin’. Stay as long as you’d like.”

“It won’t be much, I promise. Just until I can get back on my feet and find a place.”

Joel nods. “No rush, darlin’. Got plenty of room here.” He glances at the boxes in your arms. “That all you got?”

You nod. “Uh-huh.”

“Alright. Sarah, show her the guest room. I’ll heat up some chili.”

You blink. “You don’t have to—”

He’s already walking toward the kitchen. “’Course I do. Can’t have y’all movin’ boxes on an empty stomach.”

Sarah grins at you like told you so and starts up the stairs.

The guest room is bigger than your entire studio apartment. Wood floors, clean sheets, a window seat overlooking the yard. It smells like cedar and laundry detergent and a hint of tobacco smoke that clings to Joel like an afterthought. A stack of neatly folded towels waits at the foot of the bed. It’s not fancy—but it feels intentional. Like someone actually cared about making the space comfortable.

You shower, change into soft cotton shorts and a shirt, and pad downstairs, still a little unsure of your place in all this.

Joel’s in the kitchen, ladling chili into bowls, his flannel sleeves rolled again to the elbows. His forearms are dusted with dark hair, corded with strength, and you swallow hard before looking away.

He moves like he’s always half-ready to lift something heavy, the quiet confidence of a man who’s used to being relied on. You wonder what his hands would feel like—not on you, not like that, just… in your hair. On your back. Tucking a blanket around your shoulders.

He doesn’t say much over dinner. Just listens while Sarah fills the silence, talking about professors and internships and how excited she is that you’re staying. He asks you a few questions, soft and low: how your finals went, if you need help finding work over the summer, whether you prefer coffee or tea in the morning.

Simple things. Domestic things.

But every time he speaks directly to you, your skin gets hot. It’s not what he says—it’s how. That quiet, steady drawl. The way he looks at you when you answer, really looks, like your words matter. Like you matter.

And it still makes something flutter low in your stomach, the way his eyes linger on you just a second too long when you talk.

You wonder if he notices the way you sit a little straighter when he enters the room. If he sees the way you steal glances at him when you think no one’s looking.

What you don’t know is—he does.

You settled in quickly. Joel wasn’t a talker—at least not in the mornings—but he wasn’t cold either. He made good coffee, offered rides if your class schedule lined up, and grunted his approval when you loaded the dishwasher “the right way.”

He moved around the kitchen in a way that was easy to fall into rhythm with. No unnecessary chatter, just the rustle of the newspaper, the soft clink of ceramic mugs, the smell of fresh coffee and toast. It was domestic in a way that caught you off guard—familiar, intimate, comforting.

You’d only been there three weeks, and already it felt like home. Which was dangerous. Because you were starting to look forward to seeing him more than you should.

It started small—the sound of his boots in the hallway, the low hum of him talking to himself as he worked in the garage, the way his T-shirts stretched over broad shoulders that definitely didn’t belong to a man his age. A glance too long. A laugh too soft. The way your stomach fluttered when Joel passed behind you at the kitchen counter and his hand brushed the small of your back—not even meaning to.

You’d feel the warmth of that touch long after it happened, seeping into your skin like heat from the sun. And even though you told yourself not to overthink it, that it didn’t mean anything, your body reacted all the same—tense, aware, expectant.

He was always polite. Courteous. A little gruff, sure, but that just made the softness underneath hit harder. You’d hear him in the mornings, humming low and tuneless while making coffee. You caught him once, reading a paperback novel on the porch, dog-eared and sun-bleached, his thumb absently rubbing the edge of the page. You wanted to sit down next to him. You didn’t.

He looked peaceful like that—legs stretched out, glasses slipping a little down his nose, the kind of man who lived in his own silence like it was armor. You hovered in the doorway too long that day, wondering what would happen if you broke it.

Joel wasn’t nosy.

Not in the way some folks were, at least. He minded his own damn business, kept to himself, didn’t ask questions unless he needed to. But lately—ever since you moved in—it was like the house had changed its shape.

It was the little things.

The way your laughter lilted through the hallways when Sarah showed you some dumb video. The smell of your shampoo curling out from the bathroom door in warm, steamy waves. Your shoes kicked off at the front door—small, scuffed, feminine—and your toothbrush next to his in the cup like it belonged there.

You weren’t doing anything inappropriate. You were polite, helpful, respectful. You always said thank you, always rinsed your dishes before putting them in the washer, always asked him how his day was. Hell, Sarah had brought home other friends before—ones who left dishes in the sink and hair in the drain. He hadn’t batted an eye.

But you?

You looked at him like he was something else entirely.

You didn’t mean to, he could tell. You didn’t flirt. You didn’t push boundaries. But sometimes, when you thought he wasn’t looking, your eyes lingered. Slid over his shoulders when he stretched his arms above his head. Dipped down to his hands when he was working in the yard. Stuck on his mouth when he took a sip of his beer after dinner.

And Joel noticed. God help him, he noticed.

But he didn’t do a damn thing.

Not even when you laughed at something Sarah said and threw your head back, that golden line of your throat catching the light. Not even when you wore those little cotton shorts that barely qualified as sleepwear, and brushed past him like you didn’t know what you were doing. Maybe you didn’t. Maybe you did.

He saw things. Not always directly, but enough to piece together the truth.

Like the way your eyes lingered when he handed you a plate, or how your voice got quieter when he came into the room. He’d catch your gaze in the reflection of the kitchen window, see the way you looked at him when you thought he wasn’t paying attention—not like a girl looking at her best friend’s dad, but like a woman looking at a man.

He tried not to think about it too much. It wasn’t right. Too many years, too many lines he shouldn’t cross. But Joel was still a man. And some things were hard to ignore.

He was older. Wiser. Should’ve been above even thinking about it. He didn’t entertain things that didn’t have roots. And this? This thing that simmered silently between you? It didn’t have roots. It was delicate, new, fleeting. Probably one-sided. Just a girl feeling grateful and safe under a roof that wasn’t falling apart.

Still.

He noticed.

Especially when he went out to hang laundry in the sun one Saturday, and there—damn near dead center of the clothesline—was a little scrap of fabric that stopped him cold.

Pink. Lacy. Your thong.

It swayed gently in the breeze like a whisper, like a secret only he was meant to see. The kind of thing no man in his position should be looking at—but God, it was hard not to. He felt the heat rise behind his ears, that deep, low ache settling behind his ribs like a warning bell.

He swallowed hard and looked away.

But not before he saw the way it fluttered lightly in the breeze, a tiny, taunting flag of temptation in the middle of his goddamn backyard.

He didn’t touch it. Didn’t move it. Just hung his own clean shirt a few pegs down and muttered to himself.

“Not your business, Miller.”

He knew he was in trouble when he couldn’t stop picturing it—you—folding those same little things in the laundry room, humming softly to yourself, maybe biting your lip while you read a text. Oblivious to the way you bent at the waist, the way your hair fell over your face, the way his eyes always found you no matter what room you were in.

He didn’t mean to stare. Didn’t want to.

But goddammit.

You were young. Smart. Kind. The kind of girl who brought home little bags of groceries without being asked, who laughed at his dumb jokes and called him “Mr. Miller” even though he told you not to. The kind of girl who still had the whole world ahead of her.

And Joel?

Joel was just a man trying to keep his eyes to himself.

Trying.

Trying not to picture things he had no right picturing. Not to wonder what you’d do if he ever reached out, just once, and touched your waist again on purpose. Not to imagine the taste of your laugh on his mouth or the feel of your thighs in his hands. But it was getting harder. Every day, it got harder.

One night, Sarah had gone out to the movies with some childhood friends — you decided to stay home. The house had grown still as you padded into the kitchen, wearing a pair of shorts so small they should have been illegal, and an oversized shirt.

He was nursing a beer at the table.

“Couldn’t sleep?” he asked, voice low.

You nodded, opening the fridge. “Too quiet.”

He watched you pull out a water bottle, the fridge light glowing against your skin. He tried not to let his eyes drift, but they did—bare legs, the edge of that damn thong visible beneath your waistband, like it was teasing him.

You caught him looking—but only for a second.

Neither of you said a word about it.

But the air felt thick. Too heavy for casual silence.

He cleared his throat. “That shirt’s a little big on you.”

You looked down, smiling faintly. “Didn’t have any clean ones left.”

There was a lull, quieter now. Comfortable, almost. Then he asked, “Sarah… she seein’ anybody?”

You blinked. “Like dating?”

He shrugged. “Just wonderin’. She doesn’t tell me much these days. Figured you’d know.”

You shook your head, setting your water down. “Not seriously, no. Some guy in one of her econ classes was trying to flirt with her, but she said he chewed with his mouth open and that was a dealbreaker.”

Joel snorted. “Good girl.”

You smiled. “Girl knows her worth.”

He nodded, eyes still fixed on the label of his beer bottle, turning it slowly between his fingers. “You got anybody back at school?”

The question landed softer than it should’ve. You watched him carefully, the way his shoulders stayed loose, but his voice had dropped just enough to make your heart beat a little faster.

You shook your head. “No one worth talking about.”

Joel looked up at you. Held your gaze.

“No one good enough?” he asked.

You shrugged. “They’re… I don’t know. Loud. Kind of cocky. They talk a big game and can barely hold a conversation. Or your attention.”

His jaw shifted like he was biting back a thought. “Boys your age are idiots,” he said finally. “They don’t know how to treat a woman right. Not yet.”

You let out a soft laugh. “That sounds like personal experience.”

His eyes flicked back to yours, steady, unreadable. “Somethin’ like that.”

The silence settled again—thicker now. Not awkward. Not quite.

You leaned against the counter, sipping your water, eyes flicking to his, soft and a little unsure.

“I’m not bothering you being here, am I, Mr. Miller?” you asked suddenly.

His brow furrowed. “Joel, please. And no, course not. Why would you think that?”

You shrugged, looking down. “You’ve been kinda… quiet lately.”

He hesitated.

Tell her the truth, or don’t?

That the silence was the only thing keeping him from saying something he shouldn’t. That he didn’t trust the way his voice might sound if he told you how pretty you looked when you were tired. That if he let himself talk too much, he might never stop.

“I’m just tired,” he said instead, and the lie sat heavy in the space between you.

You nodded slowly, but your expression didn’t quite believe him.

Joel watched you disappear back down the hallway, and when he heard your bedroom door click shut, he let out a long, quiet breath.

This was a bad idea.

All of it.

Letting you stay. Letting himself look. Letting himself feel. He’d kept his head down for years—just work, just routine, just doing right by Sarah. But now? Now, every second you were in the house chipped away at his resolve.

But when he closed his eyes, all he could see was pink lace swaying in the sun.

The spare room was cozy in a mismatched, homey way. The walls were painted a soft blue, the bedspread faded but clean, and an old acoustic guitar leaned in the corner like it had stories of its own. You were sitting cross-legged on the bed, while Sarah sprawled out in the doorway with a soda and a bag of chips, already halfway through her second story about her high school boyfriend getting chased off by Joel.

“I swear to God,” she said between crunches, “Dad answered the door holding a wrench. Like, deliberately. Just stood there cleaning it like he was in a mob movie. And Dustin? Gone. Out the driveway, full sprint. Never texted me again.”

You snorted. “Honestly, good for him. Sounds like your dad was just doing the Lord’s work.”

“Please. He was so dramatic. He didn’t even like Dustin. Said he looked like a ‘wet Q-tip with a bad attitude.’”

You laughed so hard you nearly choked.

Sarah grinned, then tilted her head, studying you. “I can’t believe you’re actually living here. Like, in my house. This is so weird.”

“Is it?”

“Kinda. You’re like, my person. And now you’re crashing with me and my dad. It’s like a weird sitcom. ‘Two girls, one grumpy Texan dad, chili every night.’”

You grinned, tossing a pair of socks into a drawer. “He’s not that grumpy.”

“Give it a week,” she said. “You haven’t seen him in lawn mode. Or ‘someone parked wrong in the street’ mode.”

“Still,” you said, casually — way too casually — “your dad’s kind of… hot.”

Sarah choked mid-sip and immediately started coughing.

You froze. Then winced. “…Oh my God.”

She held up a hand, wheezing and sputtering. “What. Did you just say?”

You covered your face with both hands. “Forget it. Forget I said anything. I—God, that slipped out. Jesus.”

She stared at you, open-mouthed, like you’d just confessed to a war crime.

“You think my dad is hot?”

You peeked at her through your fingers. “I said kind of!”

“That’s not better!”

You flopped back on the bed, groaning into the comforter. “I didn’t mean to say it out loud.”

“You meant it, though,” she accused, pointing the neck of her soda bottle at you. “That was some ‘I’ve-thought-about-this-in-the-shower’ kind of confession.”

You dragged a pillow over your face. “He’s just… rugged, okay? That whole strong, quiet, Southern thing? It’s a thing.”

“I really didnt want to know that you wanted to bang my dad!”

“I didn’t say I wanted to—”

“You didn’t not say it!”

You bit your lip to keep from laughing. “I’m just saying. The flannel. The beard. The arms. Your dad’s hot. Objectively.”

She blinked at you. “You cannot say that to me.”

You covered your face with both hands, half-laughing, half-dying inside. “I’m sorry. It just slipped out. Like verbal diarrhea.”

Sarah threw a pillow at you, but she was laughing now, loud and open-mouthed.

“You can’t say things like that while living under his roof!”

“I won’t!” you insisted. “It’s just between us. Totally harmless. I’ll keep it locked away.”

Sarah rolled her eyes. “You better. One slip and I’m kicking your ass out so fast your socks’ll still be inside.”

Saturdays were for repairs.

Joel had the garage door rolled halfway up, sunlight slanting in dusty golden lines across the concrete, sawdust clinging to the curl of his beard, oil on his jeans, and a socket wrench in his hand. His old Ford truck sat like a patient in surgery, hood propped open, the guts of the engine laid bare.

He didn’t hear the approaching footsteps until—

“Damn, big brother. Thought I’d find you inside, makin’ breakfast for your little college girl.”

Joel grunted and turned just enough to see Tommy leaning against the frame of the garage, arms crossed, sunglasses pushed up into that ever-confident smirk.

“Don’t start,” Joel muttered.

“Oh, I’m startin’,” Tommy said, pushing off the frame and strolling in. His boots scuffed the floor like he owned it, like he always did. “Sarah told me. Said you got some cute little roommate now. Friend from school. Needed a place to stay. All innocent and temporary-like.”

Joel wiped his hands on a rag, knuckles scraped raw, jaw tight.

“She’s Sarah’s friend. That’s it.”

Tommy raised an eyebrow. “Uh-huh.”

Joel shot him a look—sharp enough to cut, the kind that used to end bar fights before they began.

Tommy held up his hands in mock surrender, laughing. “Hey now, I ain’t judgin’.If I were you, I’d be prayin’ to God she accidentally walked in on me in the shower.”

Joel exhaled hard through his nose, tossing the rag aside. A muscle in his jaw ticked. “She’s twenty, Tommy. I’m not prayin’ for anythin’.”

“Bullshit,” Tommy said, circling the truck and leaning close. His voice dropped, grin turning wolfish. “You think I don’t know that look? That tight-shouldered, jaw-clenched, eyes-averted ‘I’m definitely not starin’ at her tits’ look?”

Joel didn’t answer. Just picked up another wrench and bent back under the hood.

“Man, this is perfect. This is like every guy’s fantasy—having a sweet little thing livin’ under your roof.”

“Shut the hell up,” he muttered.

Tommy slapped his back. “C’mon. You’re not dead, man.”

Joel shot him a flat look. Deadpan, dangerous. “I ain’t touchin’ that, alright? She’s a goddamn kid. And a good one.”

“You do you, man. But let me know if Sarah has more college friends lookin’ for a place to stay. Got plenty of empty space in my bed.”

Joel gave him a warning glare that could’ve curdled milk. A low, guttural sound barely restrained in his throat.

Tommy held up both hands, grinning. “Can’t blame a guy for tryin’.”

That night Joel’d waited until he heard your door close. Waited until the house settled again. He stayed up late on purpose—he always did when the thoughts got bad. Tried to wear himself out with TV and whiskey and reruns of shows he wasn’t even watching.

But it didn’t help.

Not tonight.

His bedroom was dim, just moonlight through the blinds striping the bed in pale, prison-bar lines. He lay there in just his boxers, one arm behind his head, the other resting on his stomach.

He hadn’t touched himself in months. Maybe longer. Not seriously. Not like this.

He closed his eyes.

Usually he thought of nothing. Just the feeling. Just friction. Just need.

But tonight…

Tonight, without warning, he pictured you.

You—laughing in the kitchen, sleeves pushed up, water dripping off your wrists as you scrubbed a plate. You—bent over the dryer in those little shorts, stretching on your toes to reach the fabric softener. You—curled up on the couch in his flannel, bare thighs and sleepy eyes, so soft and unaware.

Joel’s breath hitched.

No.

He shouldn’t.

He shifted on the mattress, hand dragging lower—slow, hesitant, full of guilt. His palm pressed flat over the growing heat beneath his waistband, and he exhaled like it hurt. Because in some ways, it did.

This wasn’t a fantasy. Not really.

It was memory.

Real moments. Real sounds. The way you said his name when you asked for help reaching the tall shelves. The innocent way you’d smiled that first night when he offered you coffee and your fingers brushed his.

You weren’t trying to tempt him. You weren’t doing anything wrong.

And still—God help him—he was getting hard thinking about you.

He grunted softly, frustrated, but his hand was already slipping beneath the waistband of his boxers, fingers curling around his cock with a low, guttural sound he couldn’t bite back. Hard and heavy in his fist, the heat of it made him wince, like it shamed him to want this badly.

Eyes screwed shut, he tried to keep it vague—faceless, nameless. Just friction. Just relief. But his mind betrayed him.

He saw the way your panties peeked above your waistband when you bent over. The damp outline they sometimes left on your shorts. The little, unconscious noise you’d made that day you tripped and he caught you—his hands curling too tight around your waist, the soft give of your body against his. How your breath hitched when you looked up at him, close enough to kiss.

He was already too far gone.

He bit down hard on the inside of his cheek, groaning under his breath as his hand stroked again—long, slow, dragging his palm over the tip where precum slicked his skin. Not rough. Not fast. Just aching. Like he was trying to hold on to something he had no right to want. Like he wanted it to hurt a little.

Goddamn, he could almost hear it—your voice breaking as you moaned his name, breathy and begging. Could feel your thighs squeezing around him, back arching beneath him, nails raking down his shoulders. Your pussy clenching around him so tight he couldn’t breathe.

His fist moved faster now, hips flexing up into it, lost in it, drowning in the image of your face beneath him, mouth open, eyes glazed, whispering please, please, Joel

Don’t do this. Don’t think about her like that.

But he couldn’t stop.

Because when was the last time someone touched him? When was the last time someone looked at him the way you did, like he was more than a tired man with a worn-down heart and calloused hands?

He couldn’t stop thinking about your hand instead of his—smaller, softer, fingers wrapping around him with purpose. Curious, hungry. The way you’d look up at him while you did it, those eyes wide and dark, lips parted, so goddamn pretty.

But then his mind wandered lower, your mouth around him, soft and wet and warm, the plush slide of your lips over the tip. He imagined you licking up the precum first, sweet and teasing, just to watch him squirm. He imagined the sound you’d make when he hit the back of your throat, your fingers digging into his thighs as he groaned for you.

His hips lifted without him meaning to. The sheets bunched under his thighs, breath growing louder, faster, the pressure building.

And then—

From the hallway—a creak.

Joel froze. His pulse slammed in his throat. He held his breath.

Nothing followed. Just the house settling. Just pipes groaning. Just his own heartbeat, pounding loud in his ears.

He let go of himself, panting, hand still slick and shaking.

He hadn’t even finished.

But it felt like a confession anyway.

He rolled onto his side, ashamed and aching, like his skin didn’t quite fit right anymore. Jaw clenched so tight it hurt.

You deserved better than this. Better than a man who couldn’t stop thinking about you in the dark.

But Joel didn’t sleep that night.

Because now he’d let the thought in.

And it wasn’t going anywhere.

The backyard smelled like mesquite smoke and beer. Laughter floated up with the dusk, low and warm, curling into the branches of the old oak tree Joel had been meaning to trim.

The kind of laugh that hummed through the air like music, folding into the rustle of leaves overhead, the slow creak of porch steps under shifting weight. The sun had just dipped below the horizon, leaving behind a smear of gold and lavender in the sky, and the scent of meat on the grill mixed with citronella and cut grass.

It was one of those rare Texas evenings that made you forget the heat ever existed. The kind where neighbors came out of hiding, kids darted between legs, and old men leaned against porch railings, sipping cheap whiskey like it was the good stuff.

Joel had dragged out the grill, lit the citronella candles, and let Sarah handle the music. He wasn’t a party guy—but he’d hosted enough barbecues over the years to make it seem like second nature. Burgers. Beer. Music.

You were sitting near the edge of the porch in one of those fold-up chairs with the mesh cupholders, cradling a drink and laughing at something Sarah said.

The porch light hit your shoulders just right, casting a soft glow over your skin, catching the glint of your earrings as you tipped your head back to laugh. One foot tucked under your knee, the other tapping gently to the beat of the old country song Sarah had queued up.

And you looked good.

Too good. It hit him like a sucker punch every time he let his eyes linger too long. The way your hair was twisted up off your neck, leaving your throat bare. The delicate dip of your collarbone. The curve of your lips wrapped around the rim of your beer bottle, glossy and a little smudged. You didn’t look like you belonged on his porch—you looked like you belonged in a dream.

Joel had noticed the minute you walked out of the house, dress catching the breeze and clinging in the right places. Your legs crossed and bare, that little tilt of your head when you listened too closely.

You wore that white dress like it had been made for you. Thin straps. Tied at the waist. Flowing just enough to look innocent, but short enough to make his thoughts stray. Your skin was sun-kissed from the last weekend trip with Sarah, and Joel’s eyes kept betraying him—dragging down your thighs, your knees, the hem that danced along your mid-thigh every time the wind kicked up.

Then Tommy showed up.

Joel clocked the change immediately. Tommy didn’t even hide it. The way his smile lit up when he saw you, the way he pulled up a chair right next to yours without asking, cracking a fresh beer like he belonged there.

The bastard didn’t even pause. Just waltzed in like he’d been invited to flirt. Elbows out, grin wide, voice pitched just loud enough to draw you in. Joel saw the way you smiled back, polite, curious. The way you angled your body, legs still crossed but turned just enough to make room for Tommy. It lit a fire low in his chest. One he didn’t want to name.

Joel tried to ignore it.

He manned the grill like he was supposed to. Kept his head down. Tended to the burgers and ribs, tongs in hand, beer sweating beside him.

But every time he glanced up—

There was Tommy. Leaning close. Laughing louder. His knee brushing yours, his arm slung casually behind your chair. He was telling a story, waving his hands for emphasis, and you were looking at him like he was interesting. Like he was funny.

You were in that white dress with the tie at the waist—pretty, light, a little too short. Your hair was up. You were holding a beer bottle like you didn’t know what to do with it.

And Tommy was eating it up.

Soaking in your laugh like sunlight, leaning in every time you shifted, letting his knee stay pressed to yours like it was nothing. Like he could.

Joel’s jaw was grinding so tight he could feel it in his molars. He wasn’t your boyfriend. You were Sarah’s friend. A guest in his home. A girl in her twenties.

He had no claim on you.

But watching Tommy try to take his place? Watching his younger brother flash that same damn smile he used in high school to steal Joel’s crushes?

He stabbed the burger too hard, juice hissing into the flames. The smoke rose too fast, stinging his eyes. Or maybe that was the heat building behind them. Either way, he didn’t look up again until he heard you laugh. That sound again. Soft and sharp all at once. Right into Tommy’s chest.

“Easy there, cowboy,” Bill, his neighbor, muttered from beside him, nursing a beer. “Grill didn’t cheat on you.”

Joel didn’t respond.

Didn’t trust himself to speak. Could feel the words backing up in his throat like fire behind a dam. He swallowed them with a long pull of beer, jaw clenched so hard it hurt.

He couldn’t stop watching Tommy.

The way he smiled like it cost him nothing. Like there wasn’t a line between charm and audacity. Joel had always drawn that line. Tommy had never cared where it was.

His younger, easier, unmarried brother. Tan from too much sun. Smiling like he didn’t know the weight of anything. Carefree in a way Joel had never been—not even when he was Tommy’s age. Throwing out compliments like they cost him nothing, like you weren’t standing in Joel’s backyard with Joel’s beer in your hand, wearing that dress that already had his goddamn head spinning.

“You ever model before?” Tommy asked you, loud enough that Joel caught it even over the sizzle of meat on the grill. “Swear I’ve seen you in a magazine or somethin’.”

You laughed, ducked your head. “You’re ridiculous.”

That sound—your laugh—it landed like a punch to Joel’s ribs. Not because it was loud. Because it was real. Because it wasn’t the laugh you gave Joel when he muttered something dry and self-deprecating.

Joel didn’t realize how hard he was gripping the tongs until Bill nudged him again.

“Jesus, Joel. You’re gonna bend steel.”

He eased his fingers off the metal with effort, joints tight, jaw tighter. Didn’t like the way Tommy was looking at you. Didn’t like the way you were looking back.

And what scared him most—what twisted sharp in his gut—was how much he wanted to interrupt.

To go over there and say something. Anything. Put a hand on your hip. Call you sweetheart. Wrap an arm around you just to remind his brother that this wasn’t some neighborhood barbecue with a bunch of single girls. This was his house. And you were—

He didn’t even let the thought finish.

“…So I told the guy,” Tommy was saying, beer in hand, leaning one forearm on the porch post like he was settling in for the long haul, “if you’re gonna lie about catchin’ the fish, at least make it sound like you were in the same state. Ain’t nobody pulling a hundred-pound catfish outta Lake Travis.”

You laughed again—and Joel felt that one down to his goddamn bones.

“You’re full of it,” you said, grinning like Tommy was the funniest man you’d ever met.

“Nah,” Tommy shot back, flashing that boyish smile, the one Joel used to see melt girls in high school. “I’m full of charm. You’re just not used to Texas boys with real stories.”

“I don’t think you qualify as a boy anymore.”

“Oh?” His brows lifted. “But I qualify for something, right?”

Joel’s grip on the tongs tightened again. He wasn’t even looking at the grill anymore. Just standing there, motionless, trying not to glare at the way Tommy had turned a little more toward you—his body angled in that cocky stance, like he thought he was already winning you over. Like Joel wasn’t three feet away, feeling like his whole body was coiled with something ugly and hot.

He cleared his throat. Loudly.

Tommy glanced his way, casual as hell. “You good over there, big brother? Smoke ain’t gettin’ to your eyes, is it?”

Joel muttered, “Fine,” and flipped a burger that wasn’t ready.

You turned to Joel with a soft smile. “Smells amazing, by the way.”

He nodded, short. “Thanks.”

Just that. Two syllables. Because anything more and he was gonna say something he shouldn’t.

But Tommy didn’t let up.

“So, you ever go dancin’?” he asked, voice lower now, the kind of tone meant for secrets and flirtation. “You strike me as the kind that likes to lead.”

You raised a brow. “That a bad thing?”

“Oh, not at all,” Tommy said, leaning in like the rest of the world didn’t exist. “I like a girl who knows what she wants.”

Joel snapped the grill lid shut with enough force to rattle the tongs, then turned, voice sharp:

“Burgers’re done.”

Tommy didn’t flinch. Just grinned and tossed a wink your way. “See? The man’s got timin’.”

You took a step toward the food table, brushing past Joel with a polite “thank you,” your fingers grazing his—just a blink of contact, but it seared straight through him like a live wire.

Tommy stayed glued to your side as you both stepped away from the grill.

“So,” he said, tilting his beer toward you, “you been livin’ with my big brother long?”

Joel pretended not to listen. But his ears were trained on every word.

“A couple months,” you said, lifting your burger. “Sarah let me crash at her place when my lease got pulled.”

Tommy let out a low whistle. “Damn. Brave girl. Didn’t think Joel was good company for anyone under fifty.”

Joel turned slowly, voice dry. “Still right here.”

Tommy smirked, undeterred. “Relax, brother. I’m just saying—she deserves a little fun. I mean, you lettin’ her go out? See the town? Or you keepin’ her locked up like a princess in a tower?”

You laughed. And Joel could practically feel the heat climbing his neck.

“I go out,” you said, eyes bright, lips curved. “I just haven’t had a tour around the city yet.”

Tommy stepped in closer. “Well, lucky you. I’m available.”

Joel’s hand tightened around his beer bottle until the glass creaked. He took a long, slow sip, hoping the cold would cool the fire behind his ribs.

“Tommy,” he said at last, voice low and controlled, “you ever think of not flirtin’ with every woman who makes eye contact?”

You flushed—not embarrassed. Flattered. And Joel saw it. In the curve of your smile. The flicker of lashes. The little spark you didn’t even try to hide.

He was going to lose it.

Tommy leaned in one last time, voice dropping to a low hum, like a fucking dare:

“If you ever get tired of hangin’ around grumpy old men, sweetheart, you let me know. I’ll take real good care of you.”

Joel didn’t let you answer.

“Tommy,” he barked, “go grab more ice. Cooler’s low.”

Tommy blinked, then looked at Joel—and just for a second, the cocky routine slipped. That grin turned sharp. Knowing. Like he’d seen right through him.

He clapped Joel on the shoulder. “Sure thing, big brother.”

Joel watched him walk off, shoulders tense, pulse drumming, until he heard your voice beside him.

“You alright?” you asked, soft.

Joel exhaled through his nose. No. Not even a little.

But all he said was, “You hungry or what?”

You lifted your plate. “Starving.”

He nodded once, his eyes flicking down to the hem of your dress, the curve of your hip. Your hand resting there like it belonged. Like it wouldn’t kill him to touch it.

“Eat up,” he muttered. “Party’s just getting started.”

But in his head, Joel was already ending it. Because if he had to hear Tommy call you sweetheart one more time, he was gonna do something real stupid.

He found Tommy in the kitchen, dumping ice from the freezer into the cooler.

“The hell are you doin’?” Joel asked, voice already rough.

Tommy laughed. “Jesus, Joel. You’re wound tighter than barbed wire. You scared I’m gonna take her off your hands?”

Joel stepped in, slow. Controlled. Dangerous.

“I’m tellin’ you,” he said quietly, “cut it out.”

Tommy raised both hands. “Why? She’s grown. If she’s not interested, she can tell me herself.”

“That ain’t the point.”

Tommy leaned on the counter, smirking. “Jesus, Joel. She ain’t yours.”

Joel’s jaw clenched. “I didn’t say she was.”

“But you sure act like it.”

Silence. Long. Heavy. Joel looked past him, to the dark yard, like he could find calm in the quiet.

“You don’t know what you’re doin’. She ain’t—”

“Ain’t what? Old enough? Legal?” Tommy scoffed. “She’s grown, Joel. More than capable of flirtin’ back, far as I can tell.”

“She ain’t some girl for you to mess around with.��

Tommy narrowed his eyes. “But she’s okay for you, right? That what this is?”

Joel’s fists were clenched so tight now it hurt. Shoulders drawn up. Holding back everything.

“You’re losin’ your goddamn mind,” Tommy said softly. “And for what? You ain’t gonna touch her. You’d never let yourself. So why’re you actin’ like she’s yours?”

Joel turned away, dragging a hand down his face.

“She don’t want you.”

Tommy smirked. “Yeah? And what makes you so sure?”

Joel looked up, dead cold. “’Cause if she did, you wouldn’t be standin’ here right now.”

Tommy’s brows lifted. But his voice was calmer now.

“Look, I was just talkin’. She’s sweet. Pretty. Grown. Not seein’ anyone. What’s the harm?”

“The harm,” Joel hissed, “is that she’s Sarah’s friend. She’s stayin’ under my roof. And you’re out there talkin’ to her like she’s some bar girl you’re tryin’ to take home for the night.”

Tommy tilted his head. “She didn’t seem to mind.”

Joel’s hands curled into fists again. And that’s when Tommy saw it. Saw the heat under the surface. The tension. The want.

“…Shit,” he said slowly. “You like her.”

Joel didn’t answer.

Tommy laughed, low and stunned. “Damn. Joel.”

“Don’t start,” Joel warned, voice gravel.

“She’s young.”

“I know.”

“She’s Sarah’s age.”

“I know.”

“And she’s livin’ with you—”

“I ain’t doin’ anything.”

Tommy’s voice dropped. “But you want to.”

That silence was louder than anything.

Tommy let out a soft whistle. “Jesus Christ.”

Joel’s hands were shaking.

“It ain’t like that,” he said, but even he didn’t believe it.

“You sure?” Tommy asked. “’Cause the way you were lookin’ tonight? If I’d put a hand on her leg, I think you would’ve taken my head off.”

Joel’s jaw worked.

“Don’t.”

Tommy held up a hand. “Alright. I get it. You got your reasons. But if you don’t want anyone sniffin’ around her, Joel, you better figure out what the hell you’re doin’. ‘Cause she’s not gonna sit in your house forever waitin’ for you to stop starin’ and say somethin’.”

Joel said nothing. Just stood there, heart hammering, blood pounding behind his ribs.

Tommy’s voice softened as he turned toward the door.

“…She looked at you, too, you know.”

Joel’s head snapped up.

Tommy shrugged. “When she thought you weren’t lookin’. Girl’s not blind. And you sure as hell aren’t either.”

He walked out, whistling again, low and tuneless.

Joel stayed in the kitchen, fists still clenched, the sound of your laugh still echoing in his ears.

And he knew then—if he didn’t act soon, someone else would.

The last guest had left an hour ago.

The grill was cold, the lights on the back porch dimmed. The backyard—once buzzing with laughter and clinking bottles—was quiet now, save for the low chirp of cicadas and the hum of a box fan in the window.

Sarah had fallen asleep hours ago, tucked under her comforter with one of those tween magazines half-open on her chest.

But sleep didn’t come easy for you—not after the way the night had unraveled.

Not after the way Joel had watched you all evening like you were something he couldn’t touch—but wanted to. Badly.

You padded downstairs barefoot, drawn by the low glow seeping from the lounge and the sound of the TV murmuring softly. The wooden floor creaked under your feet as you turned the corner.

Joel was there.

Sitting on the couch, one arm slung along the backrest, half a beer still in his hand. The light from the TV flickered across his face, painting his features in silver and shadow. He looked tired—but not in a way that meant sleep. More like he was carrying the kind of weight sleep couldn’t shake loose.

He noticed you right away, his eyes flicking toward you and holding there.

“Can’t sleep?” he asked, voice low and rough.

You shook your head. “Too much in my head.”

He nodded, slow, like he understood exactly what you meant.

Joel reached down to the small cooler next to the couch, cracked it open, and pulled out another beer. He held it up to you.

You hesitated.

Then crossed the room and took it from his hand.

“Thanks,” you said, sinking into the opposite end of the couch. The beer was cold against your palm. “You okay?”

Joel’s jaw flexed. “Fine.”

“You don’t seem fine.”

He finally looked at you—and it hit him like a punch to the chest, how close you were. How pretty you looked in that damn dress. How warm your eyes were when they looked only at him.

“I’m just tired,” he said. But it came out too clipped, too tight.

His voice came quiet, a little rough. “Tommy’s just a flirt. He don’t mean half of what he says.”

You raised an eyebrow, taking a slow sip of your beer. “Huh. That sounded an awful lot like jealousy.”

Joel gave a short breath of a laugh—no humor in it. “Ain’t jealous.”

“You sure?” you teased. “’Cause you looked like you wanted to put him through the grill when he offered to show me his motorcycle.”

Joel’s gaze snapped to yours. “That bike’s a piece of shit.”

You smirked. “You didn’t say that earlier.”

“Didn’t feel like gettin’ into it.”

You tilted your head. “But you were mad?”

“No,” Joel muttered, voice low. “Not mad.”

You hesitated. “At me?”

His eyes met yours—dark, unreadable, like storm clouds heavy with something about to break.

“No,” he said. “Not at you.”

But the way he said it—low, rough, like gravel under bare feet—made your heart stutter.

You stepped closer.

“You didn’t like Tommy flirting with me.”

Joel’s eyes flicked to yours. He didn’t answer.

You didn’t push, not really—but you stood your ground. “You could’ve said something.”

He shook his head. “Didn’t have a right to.”

Your voice was quiet. “Do you want one?”

The silence stretched.

Joel didn’t move.

Didn’t speak.

Didn’t blink.

And you could feel the way the air between you changed—thickened, weighted, humming. Like the moment you speak too loud in a chapel. Like the moment before lightning splits the sky.

Then—

“You shouldn’t let Tommy flirt with you.”

That surprised you. “Why not?”

He looked at you now, really looked. Eyes dark and steady. “…Because he doesn’t know what to do with someone like you.”

The air stilled.

You couldn’t breathe for a second.

You licked your lips, your voice barely above a whisper. “And you do?”

Joel looked away. Tense. Like he was angry with himself for even letting that slip.

“It’s late,” he muttered. “You should get some sleep.”

“No.” You said firmly. “You don’t get to end the conversation like this.”

You asked again, voice softer now. “Do you know what to do with someone like me, Joel?”

His eyes were heavy on your face. Searching. Dark. And something burned behind them that he could barely hold back anymore.

“…Yeah. I do.”

Your breath caught.

“And what would you do?”

“I’d treat you so nice, darlin’,” he said, his voice like molasses, thick and warm and dangerous. “Like nobody had treated you before. A guy like Tommy likes easy, likes girls who want a good time. He’d just… touch you like he didn’t know what he was holdin’. That ain’t right.”

Joel stepped closer—just an inch. You felt the heat from him.

“But I shouldn’t,” he added, voice hoarse. “I shouldn’t want to. You’re young. You’re Sarah’s friend. You deserve someone who’s—who’s not me.”

You looked up at him, heart pounding. “I don’t want someone else.”

Joel exhaled hard. Like the words hit him in the chest.

“You’re not gonna be able to take it back if we cross this line,” he murmured. “You understand that?”

You nodded. “I’m not trying to take anything back.”

“I’m tryin’ to be a good man here,” he said, voice strained. “I’ve been real patient with you, baby. Real careful. And you—you keep lookin’ at me like that, sayin’ shit like that—and you don’t know what that’s doin’ to me.”

You leaned in just enough that your knee brushed his. “Then tell me,” you murmured. “Or better yet—show me.”

That was it.

The last thread snapped.

Joel grunted low in his throat—frustration, need, pure hunger—and then he had you.

His mouth crashed onto yours, rough and desperate and messy, like a man who’d been dreaming about this with his hand wrapped around himself for too damn long.

His kiss was all heat and punishment, his hands gripping your hips like he didn’t trust his own restraint.

He kissed like he wanted to crawl inside you, drink you down, fix something that had been broken for years.

You gasped into him. His hand tangled in your hair, another at your hip, gripping too tight, like he couldn’t believe you were real.

You could feel how hard he was already, how badly he wanted this, how long he’d been holding it back. All that restraint—gone.

He broke the kiss with a growl, pressed his forehead against yours, breathing hard.

“This is so fuckin’ wrong,” he panted.

“Feels right to me.”

Joel stared at you.

Then he kissed you again—harder. Dirtier. Tongue sliding into your mouth, hands gripping your waist like he was afraid you’d disappear if he didn’t hold tight.

This time, there was no hesitation. No pause. Just want. All of it.

The kiss slowed. His mouth dragging along your jaw, your neck, breathing you in, reverent and desperate all at once.

“I’ve been so fuckin’ lonely,” he muttered. “You don’t know what it’s like—wakin’ up and you’re here, walkin’ around in those little shorts, your panties hangin’ on the line like it ain’t nothin’—and I can’t touch you. Can’t even look at you the way I want to.”

You gasped as he pressed closer. His lips brushing the shell of your ear.

Joel growled again. Low. Possessive.

“Christ.”

And just like that, he scooped you up—thick arms banded tight around you like steel, lifting you like you weighed nothing—and carried you to his room.

The room was dim, lit only by the bedside lamp. Your body stretched out on his sheets—bare legs parted slightly, skin flushed and begging, eyes glassy and wide like you were already half-drunk on him. You looked like a dream. A wet dream. Like a fantasy he’d kept locked in his chest for too long.

Joel stood at the edge of the bed for a moment, just drinking you in.

“You have no idea,” he muttered, voice cracked, “how many fuckin’ nights I’ve pictured this.”

You smiled, soft and knowing. “Then stop picturing.”

His jaw clenched. That crooked smirk flickered across his face—but there was hunger underneath it. Hunger and something darker.

His hands went to his shirt, yanking it off in one swift movement.

Your breath hitched.

Joel wasn’t perfect—he was raw, rough-edged, built like he was carved from something older than the room you lay in. Wide chest, solid arms, scars that caught the light. Real. Male. Fucking beautiful.

His eyes dragged down your body like they couldn’t help themselves. Lingering on every inch. Your breasts. The curve of your thighs. He looked like he wanted to crawl inside you.

He was on you in a second.

Mouth hot and greedy against your throat. His stubble scraped and burned in the best way—trailing fire over your collarbone, down your chest, each kiss wetter than the last, lips dragging like he needed your taste to survive.

His hand slid up your thigh—slow, reverent, rough palm against soft skin—and when his fingers caught the hem of your dress, he froze.

“I ever tell you how fuckin’ beautiful you are?” he murmured.

You shook your head, breath shaky.

He smiled—just barely. A tiny curve, crooked, a little sad, like he couldn’t believe he got to say it out loud.

“You are,” he said, brushing his nose along your cheek. “Prettiest thing I’ve ever seen. Gonna ruin you for anyone else.”

He kissed you soft this time. Gentle. Like he didn’t want to rush a single second of this.

And then he wasn’t soft anymore.

He groaned low in his throat, that deep, broken sound like he was barely holding it together, hands dragging down the neckline of your dress until the fabric gave, slipping under his rough palms.

Then your tits bounced free—and he froze, like he’d just been knocked clean out of his body.

His eyes locked on them, dark and hungry, jaw slack with awe.

“Jesus,” he murmured, reverent and wrecked all at once. Like the sight of you was something holy and obscene.

He reached out, cupped your breast in one big, calloused hand, and you gasped at the heat of it. His thumb brushed over your nipple—slow, deliberate, circling until it peaked, hard and aching—and he groaned again, this time deeper, rougher, like he felt it in his spine.

“You’re so fuckin’ perfect,” he rasped, voice thick. “How the hell are you even real?”

Then his mouth was on you—hot, open, wet. He sucked your nipple into his mouth, tongue flicking over it, slow and filthy, while his other hand kneaded your other breast, squeezing just hard enough to make you gasp.

He sucked deep, then pulled off with a wet pop. Your nipple glistened, swollen from his mouth, and he just stared for a second—watching it twitch in the air like he couldn’t decide if he wanted to suck it again or bite.

“You don’t know what you do to me, baby,” he murmured, dragging his mouth down to the soft underside of your breast. “These fuckin’ tits—made for me. Gonna fuckin’ live here.”

Then he pressed them together, tongue darting between them, mouthing at your skin like he was claiming you with every lick.

His hand slipped under your dress—and when he felt how wet you were, he groaned deep in his chest.

“Baby…” he rasped. “You’re soaked.”

He slid his fingers through your slit—just barely—and when he felt how slick you were, his whole body jerked.

You bit your lip, hips shifting toward his touch.

“Joel,” you whined. “Please.”

He looked up at you. Smirked.

“So damn impatient,” he murmured, dragging his mouth along your jaw, “these kids nowadays, always in a rush. Don’t know how to slow down and savor it.” His voice dropped, thick and dark with heat. “But you—you want it so bad you’re practically shakin’, huh, baby? Can’t wait to be full, can you?”

You nodded, breath catching.

Joel swore again—his voice cracked when he did it, like he just couldn’t believe it.

“You don’t fuckin’ know what that does to me.”

His fingers found your clit, rubbing slow but firm, just enough to make you arch and gasp, your thighs twitching as your eyes closed in pleasure.

“Uh-uh. Look at me,” he growled, low and commanding, fingers tightening just enough to keep your eyes on his. “Wanna see every damn second of you comin’ apart for me.”

You met his eyes—and the look he gave you nearly ruined you. Like he was drowning in you. Like he’d waited years to feel this, touch this, taste this.

His voice was thick and raw. “That’s right. You’re mine tonight, baby. Gonna fuckin’ show you what it means.”

You gasped as his fingers stroked slow and filthy over your clit, teasing, circling, just enough to make you arch up into his hand.

“Gonna take care of you,” he murmured. “Wanna make you feel good, darlin’. You deserve that.”

Then he slid down the bed—hands firm on your hips, tugging your dress up. Eyes locked to the flash of your panties. His hand skimmed the waistband, thumb dragging across the soft cotton.

“These the ones I saw hangin’ outside?” he rasped.

Your lips curled. “Maybe.”

Joel exhaled hard. His eyes darkened, jaw flexed.

He pulled them down, dragged them off your legs like he was unwrapping something precious—

And when he saw you—saw you—he just stopped.

Stared.

“Fuckin’ hell,” he muttered. “You’re perfect. You—you can’t be real.”

You tried to close your legs—suddenly shy—but his hands kept them open.

“No, baby,” Joel said. “You let me see.”

Then he leaned in and licked a slow, deliberate stripe up your cunt. His tongue was broad, hot, dragging through your folds like he wanted to taste every inch of you. And when it hit your clit, he groaned like it knocked the wind out of him.

He groaned like it knocked the wind out of him.

You cried out—hips jerking—but he held you firm.

“Sweetest fuckin’ pussy,” he breathed. He pressed his mouth there again, tongue flicking slow and filthy. “You taste like sin.”

And then he devoured you.

Sloppy, greedy, wet—sucking your clit like he meant to pull the soul out of you.

He moaned into your pussy like he was drunk on it — messy, loud, absolutely gone for the taste of you. He licked like a man possessed, mouth wet and greedy, groaning like he couldn’t get deep enough. His beard scratched your thighs raw, his tongue dragging through your slick like he’d been starved for days and finally got fed. He spit on you just to lap it back up, filthy and shameless, fucking you open with his tongue until your hips jerked and your thighs shook.

And when he wrapped his lips around your clit, sucking hard and slow, it was obscene — the sound, the pressure, the way he palmed his aching cock through his pants, he needed it just as bad. He didn’t care how sloppy it got. Didn’t care how ruined he looked. He was addicted, obsessed, devouring you like your pussy was the only thing that ever made him feel alive.

“Sweet little pussy,” he muttered, almost to himself. “Mine now, yeah?”

You nodded, head rolling back, eyes fluttering.

“All yours,” you moaned. “Please, Joel, more—”

He shoved his face between your legs like he was gonna drown there and be grateful for it. His tongue pushed deep inside you, slow and filthy, fucking you with slick, deliberate strokes that made your whole body twitch. He groaned like he could taste every second of how wet you were, how wrecked you were getting just for him.

His thumb pressed tight to your clit, rubbing hard, tight little circles that made your back arch off the bed. And when your hips tried to jerk away, overstimulated and desperate, his other hand gripped your thigh like a vice — fingers bruising, holding you right there, locked in place so he could keep devouring you, mess and all, like you were his favorite sin and he had no intention of stopping.

“You gonna cum for me, darlin’?” he murmured. “Gonna cum on my tongue like a good girl?”

You sobbed out a yes—high, desperate, helpless—and he didn’t stop ‘til you fell apart.

You shattered—back arching, legs locking around his head, hips rolling up into his mouth like your body wasn’t yours anymore.

You came hard—too hard—crying his name, grinding into his face as his tongue worked you through it, lapping up everything you gave him, humming like it was the best thing he’d ever tasted.

When he finally crawled back up over you, his lips were wet, beard sticky with your slick, eyes dark, wild, feral.

“You’re killin’ me,” he said, kissing your cheek. “Never wanted anyone like I want you.”

You reached for him. Pulled at his waistband. “Please.”

Joel hesitated.

“You sure?” he asked, voice rough.

You nodded. “Please. Joel.”

“You’re not… you ain’t a…” he rasped, breath shaky, eyes searching yours.

“A virgin?” you finished for him, a low, breathless laugh slipping past your lips. “God, no.”

“I, uh…” he swallowed hard. “I don’t have any condoms. You on the pill?”

“Yes,” you said simply, dragging your mouth along his jaw. Then you pulled back just enough to look him in the eye, your voice dropping. “It’s okay, Joel. I want to feel all of you.”

And that did it.

He shoved his pants down in a hurry, and his cock sprang free—thick, hard, flushed dark with need, glistening at the tip with precum. Your breath caught in your throat, mouth parting as your eyes dragged down over him.

“Fuck,” you whispered, pulse thudding in your ears. “You’re…”

Joel looked down at you, cheeks tinged pink, a crooked little smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Yeah,” he rasped. “I know.”

Your gaze stayed locked on his cock, hunger written all over your face. “Huge,” you breathed, awe and arousal tangled in your voice.

Joel’s brow lifted, just a little smug. “You think you can take it?”

You nodded eagerly. He stroked himself once, twice, guiding the head against your entrance.

“You ready, baby?” he asked, voice soft now. “I’ll go slow. I swear. Wanna feel all of you.”

You nodded, legs parting wider, arms around his shoulders.

He pushed in slow—thick cock stretching you inch by inch, dragging a long, guttural moan from both your throats—and his head dropped to your shoulder, jaw clenched like he was in pain.

“Oh my god,” he rasped. “You feel like heaven, baby. How the fuck—how do you feel this good?”

You gasped, eyes flying wide as he pushed in—slow but relentless—stretching you open inch by inch. Your nails dug into his back, clutching at the thick muscle there, searching for something to hold onto as your body struggled to adjust around the sheer size of him.

He stopped. Gave you time. Pressed kisses to your throat.

“You okay?” he whispered.

You nodded, breathless. “Move.”

And he did.

He rocked into you slow, deep—every inch dragging against your walls, stretching you again and again—like he was trying to memorize the shape of you from the inside out. His breath came out in soft, filthy huffs as he dropped his mouth to your ear, kissed the shell of it, then began whispering the filthiest things he’d never dared say until tonight:

“How long you been wantin’ this?”

“You think about me when you’re alone, baby? Think about my hands?”

“Don’t hold back now. Wanna hear you.”

“God, you’re tight. So fuckin’ tight around me—feels like heaven.”

He pulled out almost all the way—just the head still inside, glistening, stretching you open—then slammed back in, slow but deep, right into that spot that made your breath stutter.

“Fuck,” he gasped. “You feel too good, baby. Can’t believe I waited this long…”

Your nails curled into the sheets, head thrown back. You were panting now, sweating, legs trembling from the effort of holding yourself open for him.

“Joel—please—”

That did something to him. The way you begged. His name, all soft and wrecked on your lips.

He gritted his teeth.

Then he grabbed you by the backs of your thighs and pushed your legs up, folding you open for him, pressing your knees back toward your chest.

“Hold ’em up,” he ordered, voice ragged and dark with need. “Yeah—that’s it. Just like that. Wanna see how deep I can get.”

And then he started to fuck you for real.

Deeper. Harder. Filthy. Relentless—each thrust punching a gasping moan from your throat. The angle had him hitting places that made your vision blur. The slap of his balls against your ass was wet and obscene, the bed groaning loud under the force of him, the headboard rattling against the wall.

He groaned low in his throat, watching the way your tits bounced with every thrust, the way your eyes glazed over as you took it, dripping around his cock, clenching so tight he could barely breathe.

“Been so long, baby.” he growled, “So goddamn long.”

You moaned under him, dizzy with it all—his voice, his body, the weight of him pressing you into the mattress, the way his cock hit so deep now you swore he could feel your heartbeat.

“And now I got you,” he grunted, snapping his hips into you. “Can’t believe I’m inside you,” he panted. “So goddamn pretty, so young, and I get to fuck you? You’re gonna ruin me.”

Your legs were shaking, arms weak, and Joel took over, gripping your thighs himself, holding them up so he could go deeper, grind into you harder, angle just right to wreck you from the inside out.

“Fuck,” he groaned, lips dragging over your jaw, your mouth, your ear. “Pussy so good, baby—swear to God, I’ll never want anyone else again. This is it. This is fuckin’ it.”

You were already close again—the pressure building fast, his name tumbling out of your mouth over and over.

He felt it — the way your walls fluttered around him, the way your breath hitched, that telltale tremble in your thighs. He growled low, deep in his chest, pressing in deeper, grinding his hips just right.

“Come on, baby. Wanna feel you cum on my cock. You can do it for me, yeah?”

And the way he said it, the weight in his voice, the thick pressure of him inside you, the heat rolling off his body, it unraveled you completely. You came so hard it shook you—cried out, clung to him, and he cursed, hips stuttering, fucking you through it, chasing his own release now.

His thrusts turned messy, erratic, like he was losing control—because he was. You whimpered, nails digging into his shoulders as he picked up the pace again, sweat slicking both of you as your bodies collided over and over.

“Where do you want it?” he panted. “Tell me, darlin’—can I cum inside you?”

“Please—please, yes—”

“Yeah? Gonna let me give you every drop?” His pace stuttered, breath catching. “Fuck—I’m gonna—shit—I’m—”

He slammed in deep—one final thrust, all the way to the hilt, hips grinding into yours, body shaking

And he came.

Hard.

Hot, thick spurts of cum filling you, spilling inside, leaking out around his cock as he groaned into your neck like it gutted him.

You were still trembling underneath him—boneless, ruined, thoroughly fucked, every nerve singing. Your body was flushed and filled and glowing, warmth blooming in your limbs, still pulsing in your core where he remained, thick and hot and buried deep. Joel hadn’t moved much. He was still inside you, still hovering above you like he was afraid you’d vanish if he let go.

And then, so gently it made your throat ache, he pressed a kiss to your forehead. Another to your cheek. Then your mouth—slow, soft, lingering, like a man drinking in salvation.

“Y’alright, baby?” he murmured, voice rough with gravel and sweetened with something like awe.

You nodded, your lashes fluttering as your eyes found his. “More than alright.”

Joel let out a quiet laugh, low and breathless. His shoulders finally softened, tension bleeding from his frame. He leaned down again and pressed a kiss to your collarbone—reverent, like worship, like the delicate skin there meant everything.

Then he pulled out—slowly, carefully, his eyes never leaving your face. You both gasped at the loss, a shared shiver rippling through you. He moved quickly after that, tugging the comforter up and over you, tucking you in like something breakable, his hand smoothing over your hip, then your belly, then back again—like he didn’t know how to stop touching you now that he’d started.

“Didn’t mean to go so hard,” he said quietly, his voice rasping. “Just… it’s been a long time. Felt so good. You felt so good.”

You turned your head, a sleepy smile tugging at your lips. “Joel, I wanted it. Wanted you.”

Something in his eyes shifted—like a storm easing, like guilt loosening its grip. He believed you. But still, he moved like a man trying to earn that belief, trying to prove he deserved the gift of you.

“Stay right there, darlin’,” he whispered, brushing his thumb over your cheek. “I’ll get a towel.”

You watched him go—bare, flushed, a little unsteady, walking into the bathroom with that wide, solid back and those scarred shoulders that you ached to trace again. A little older, a little weathered. But real. Solid. Yours.

Not like college boys. Not like the ones who never stayed, who’d fuck you and leave you sore and cold and wondering what you did wrong. Joel didn’t disappear. He didn’t roll over or reach for his phone or toss your underwear at you like a hint.

He took care of you.

He came back with a warm, damp cloth in one hand and a glass of water on the other. He cleaned you up with careful, practiced hands—gentle in a way that undid you, so quiet and focused it made your throat burn.

You parted your legs instinctively, and he didn’t stare, didn’t leer—just pressed a kiss to your knee as he carefully cleaned between your thighs, murmuring soft apologies when you flinched from the sensitivity.

“Sorry, baby. I know. Just a little more…”

He wiped you gently, reverently, then set the cloth aside and helped you sit up to drink.

“There we go,” he said softly, holding the glass to your lips. “Slow, now. Don’t gulp.”

When you finished, he set the glass down and climbed back into bed behind you, pulling you into his chest like he couldn’t wait another second.

“C’mere sweet girl,” he breathed, pulling you in tight.

You curled into him, soft and spent, your leg thrown over his hip, face tucked under his chin. His hands were slow, moving in lazy circles along your spine, sometimes dipping to cup your ass, then coming back up to your shoulder blades—like he was mapping you, remembering you with touch alone. When you sighed, he smiled against your hair.

“What about Sarah?”

“I’ll wake you up in the morning before she gets up,” He said. “You need anythin’? More water? A bath?”

You shook your head. “I’m good.”

Silence settled like fog—thick, warm, peaceful. His hand never stopped moving. He kept you close, kept touching you like a man afraid you’d disappear. Like a man who’d gone without softness for far too long.

“You always like this after?” you asked quietly, teasing.

“Like what?”

“So…gentle.”

He chuckled, rough and low in your ear. “Only with someone who deserves it.”

You smiled, eyes fluttering shut. “Glad you’re not twenty and selfish.”

“Yeah,” he said, voice full of amusement and something fonder. “Glad I’m not, too.”

He didn’t fall asleep. You felt it—the way his chest stayed tense under your cheek, the way his breathing was deep but too controlled. His mind was running, somewhere distant, somewhere dark.

But still, he stayed holding you. Arms tight. Body wrapped around yours like armor.

And then, when he thought you were asleep, you heard him whisper it:

“Mine now. God help me.”

You smiled into his skin.

Because you were.

So completely his.

A/N: Thank you so much for this request!! I loved the idea and I hope you liked the ending result🩷🫶🏻

Thank you as well to everyone reading this for your constant support to my fics, your kind words mean the world to me. You’re the best!!

dividers by @/saradika-graphics

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right4you · 2 months ago

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right4you · 2 months ago

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off the table

pairings joel miller x reader

summary joel discovers your hidden vibrator and turns his birthday celebration into a teasing, intimate game with a heated quickie in the bathroom.

content warnings 18+ nsfw, mature themes and language, explicit sexual content, established relationship, unspecified agegap, consensual intimacy, mild exhibitionism, teasing, sexual teasing with a vibrator, power play, and strong sexual tension. f receiving. kinda dom!joel.

masterlist

you hadn’t expected joel to find the damn thing. it had been stuffed deep in your drawer under socks and old shirts, only taken out in the rare times when joel was gone on patrol longer than usual.

but fate had other plans.

he came home three days ago with it in his hand, amusement written all over his smug face.

"what's this?" he asked, voice low, like he already knew. which he did, of course.

you had frozen, heat rushing up your neck.

you tried, grabbing for it, but he held it out of reach like he was holding a winning card.

joel cocked his head, that lazy smirk tugging at his lips.

“seems like my business if you’re usin’ it when i ain’t around.”

he didn’t scold you. didn’t tease you much either. not until the next day, when he leaned in close at breakfast, breath warm by your ear, and whispered.

"think i figured out what i want for my birthday.”

you blinked at him, fork halfway to your mouth.

“you want… the vibrator?”

he grinned. “i want you usin’ it.”

before you could reply, he added, “at the party.”

you choked on your coffee.

joel’s birthday party was not small.

everyone in jackson turned up. it was the kind of thing maria insisted on throwing. a big communal dinner in the mess hall with even a makeshift banner that said "happy birthday, joel!"

you’d hoped joel would forget. you’d hoped he was just teasing you, that his little fantasy had stayed a fantasy.

but that morning, while you were getting dressed, he tossed the vibrator onto the bed.

he didn’t say a word. just raised an eyebrow, then turned back to the mirror to button up his shirt like he hadn’t just thrown a live grenade onto the bed.

you stared at it, your stomach flipping. “you’re serious?”

joel’s reflection caught yours in the mirror. “dead serious.”

he crossed the room, slow and steady, brushing his hand along your lower back as he passed. his voice was rough silk against your neck.

“it’s my birthday,” he murmured, lips barely grazing your skin.

your breath caught. heat bloomed low in your belly.

and then he just walked out like he hadn’t just upended your entire day with a single sentence.

you and joel arrived at the mess hall together, just as the sun was dipping behind the mountains, casting jackson in golden light.

he walked with his hand resting at the small of your back, warm and steady, like a casual claim.

when you stepped inside, the room lit up with cheers and laughter.

“happy birthday, old man!” someone called out seth, probably.

joel just shook his head with a quiet chuckle, but didn’t let go of you. ellie was the first to rush up, cupcake already half-eaten in her hand and frosting on her cheek.

“told you they’d make a banner,” she said proudly, jabbing a thumb toward the crooked letters above the buffet table. “i did the ‘j.’”

joel snorted. “figured. it’s backwards.”

“shut up,” she laughed, then threw her arms around him.

"happiest birthday, joel."

tommy and maria were next tommy clapping joel on the shoulder.

“happy birthday, big bro. lookin' handsome has always.”

joel shrugged. “guess i do what i can.”

more greetings followed slaps on the back and jokes about his age.

joel took it all with his usual gruff charm, a rare softness in his eyes, especially when he glanced your way.

finally, the two of you made it to your seats him at the head of the long table, you just to his left. he pulled out your chair and you sat like nothing was different.

like you hadn’t just slipped something small and sinful between your thighs twenty minutes ago.

joel clocked you immediately. his gaze dropped to your hips for a second too long, then met your eyes with a spark of something dark and knowing.

you smiled at ellie when she handed you a cupcake. your hands were steady. your face, calm.

then joel clicked the remote under the table.

the first buzz was low and it almost didn’t register. you sat straighter, legs clenching together on instinct.

joel didn’t look at you. just lifted his glass and clinked it with tommy’s.

the second buzz made your breath hitch.

you turned to glare at him. he finally looked at you smirking, eyes full of heat and mouthed, “happy birthday to me.”

you were going to kill him.

right after you survived the night.

just as you reached for your water, tommy stood up at the far end of the table and clinked his glass loudly with a spoon.

tommy reached over to the cake sitting on the side table and lit the candles one by one, their tiny flames flickering eagerly. he handed the glowing cake to you with a mischievous grin.

“alright, everybody!” tommy shouted over the chatter. “you know what time it is! stand up, birthday boy!”

joel sighed and stood. as soon as he did, the rest of the room followed with some chairs scraping back and some where already standing, chatting, or dancing.

you held the cake close to joel, the warm candlelight flickering softly against his face.

and just as everyone stood…

click.

the vibrator jumped to its highest setting.

the jolt tore through you, sudden and sharp, stealing the breath from your lungs. your thighs clamped together. your hand gripped the thin cardboard from the cake like it could anchor you to this world.

“happy birthday to you…”

joel didn’t sing. he stood with a hand on his back, thumb on the button. like he wasn’t currently unraveling you from the inside out.

“happy birthday to you…”

you blinked rapidly, trying to remember how to breathe. every pulse of the vibrator ricocheted through your spine, low and hot and unrelenting. you kept your face neutral. mostly.

thank god the lights are out. nobody can see your flushed cheeks or how your hands are trembling as the vibrator keeps buzzing beneath the table.

“happy birthday dear joooeel…”

“feelin’ good, darlin’?”

“i’m going to end you.” you whispered back, smiling with murderous intent.

“happy birthday to you!”

the mess hall burst into applause and cheers. joel gave a modest wave, soaked in attention and affection. you sat perfectly still, pretending your legs weren’t trembling under the table.

the room grew quiet as you brought the cake closer to joel’s face again, the candle flames dancing in his eyes.

you leaned in, your voice low and sweet. “make a wish, baby.”

joel’s gaze locked onto yours, intense and warm. he inhaled slowly and blew out the candles, his eyes never leaving yours.

the lights snapped back on, and everyone cheered louder than before.

he sat down beside you and mercifully turned the vibrator back down to low.

you didn’t dare look at him.

not when you knew that smug, satisfied smirk would be waiting. not when the night was only just getting started.

you were trying to act normal.

which was a hell of a task, considering the steady buzz between your thighs was anything but.

you shifted in your seat again, pretending to reach for your water as your body tensed. across the table, joel didn’t so much as glance at you.

his focus was on his drink, on tommy’s story, on acting like he wasn’t orchestrating your slow descent into madness with the remote hidden.

ellie, of course, noticed.

“you okay?” she asked, blinking at you. “you look kinda weird.”

you stiffened. “weird?”

she squinted. “yeah. you look like… i don’t know. like you ran here.”

you forced a smile, even as a fresh wave of sensation curled heat through your belly. “it’s warm in here.”

ellie kept staring. “you’re all red. like your face is actually red. is that a fever? or a stroke?”

joel finally spoke, voice calm and smooth as honey. “she’s fine, ellie.”

you threw him a glance. he didn’t meet your eye just sipped his drink like he hadn’t just cranked the vibrator up a notch mid-conversation.

ellie, still frowning, “if she throws up, i’m not cleaning it.”

you choked on a laugh and stood quickly. “i’m just gonna—bathroom. be right back.”

you made it out of the room with your dignity barely intact.

the hall hallway was quiet, lit by soft overhead bulbs. you stumbled into the bathroom and shut the door, bracing your hands on the sink.

your breath came fast, your thighs trembling. the vibrator was still going, relentless now, and your pulse was fluttering somewhere in your throat.

you didn’t even have time to pull yourself together before the door clicked quietly open behind you.

you turned sharply already knowing who it was.

joel.

he slipped in and shut the door behind him, locking it with a soft snick. “you ran off awful quick.”

your eyes narrowed. “you’re enjoying this way too much.”

he crossed the short space between you slowly, his gaze dropping once to your hips before dragging up to meet yours.

“can you blame me? you sittin’ there all flushed and squirmy, pretendin’ nothin’s wrong…” his voice was low, teasing. “you got no idea what that’s doin’ to me.”

you opened your mouth to respond, but then his hand was on your waist, his mouth already pressing against yours.

the kiss was hungry, a little rough his fingers curling into your side, thumb grazing under the hem of your shirt. you gasped into it, his beard scraping your skin as he moved to mouth along your jaw.

“think i earned this,” he murmured. “it is my birthday.”

you huffed a breath, half a laugh and half a moan. “you’re such a bastard.”

joel grinned, his hand trailing lower. “maybe. but you’re the one who put that pretty little thing in for me.”

you whimpered when his fingers pressed against you light, teasing, making you arch toward him without thinking.

“i could turn it off,” he offered, kissing down your neck.

you nodded quickly.

“but where’s the fun in that?”

you groaned, gripping the edge of the sink as his mouth found that spot just under your ear.

“you better be glad this door locks,” you breathed.

he chuckled. “don’t need long, sweetheart.”

you didn’t need long either.

you didn’t get a chance to fully brace yourself before joel spun you around and backed you into the counter, hands already bunching your skirt up around your hips.

“i—joel—someone might hear—”

“then be quiet for me,” he murmured, already sinking to his knees.

your breath caught.

“joel—”

his hands gripped the backs of your thighs, dragging them apart just enough before hooking one of your legs over his shoulder.

the angle pressed your hips against the edge of the counter, kept you wide and open for him.

he looked up at you from under his lashes, beard already brushing your inner thigh.

“you came in here so wound up,” he rasped, voice thick. “i’m just helpin’ you relax.”

then he licked you.

long and slow, from base to clit, groaning like he was getting a taste of something he’d been craving all night.

you gasped, one hand shooting to the edge of the sink to steady yourself, the other fisting in his hair.

“fuck, joel—”

he didn’t answer. his mouth warm and wet and relentless, tongue circling your clit before sucking it between his lips.

no teasing now, no mercy. you could hear the obscene sound of it all.

wet and slick and filthy and it only made your knees wobble harder.

you bit your wrist to stay quiet, your other hand anchoring in his hair as he devoured you like a man possessed.

your orgasm hit fast. mouth parting in a desperate gasp as your thighs clamped down around his head. joel held you through it, growling into your cunt like he wanted every last drop.

only when you started to twitch did he finally pull back, licking his lips like he hadn’t just ruined you in under a minute.

“still with me?” he rasped, standing and grabbing your hips.

you stared at him, dazed, panting. “you’re a menace.”

he smirked. “and i ain’t even started yet.”

then he turned you around, bent you over the sink.

“hold on,” joel said, voice low, dark, almost reverent as he went and removed the vibrator from inside you with no shame.

then he slid into you in one deep, slick thrust.

you gasped, clutching the edge of the counter as he bottomed out.

he didn’t give you time to adjust. just started moving, hips snapping into yours in short, brutal strokes that had you biting your fist to stay quiet.

“fuck,” he hissed behind you. “still so tight—goddamn.”

you could barely breathe, the sound of your bodies echoing in the small space.

joel kept one hand braced on your hip, the other sliding under your shirt, palming your breast through your bra. his mouth pressed hot against your shoulder, teeth scraping skin before sucking hard, leaving a mark only you’d see later in the mirror.

“this what you wanted?” he growled against your skin. “walkin’ around with that little thing buzzin’ in you, gettin’ me all riled up?”

you moaned and he laughed, low and breathless, thrusts getting rougher.

“all fuckin’ night,” he gritted. “you had me hard the second you walked in that hall. knew exactly what you were doin’.”

“joel—” you gasped, voice cracking.

“i know, baby. i know.” his fingers slid between your thighs again, rubbing your clit in fast, tight circles.

“come again for me. c’mon. you can do that for me, can’t you? one more.”

you didn’t last five seconds.

your orgasm tore through you, legs buckling, cry muffled in your own sleeve as joel kept fucking you through it—deep and punishing and so fucking good. you clenched around him so hard he nearly lost it right then.

“shit—gonna come—” joel choked, pulling your hips back to meet every sharp thrust.

then he groaned, burying himself deep as he spilled into you.

the room went still. just breathing. just the heavy beat of your heart pounding in your ears.

joel stayed close, one hand rubbing your back, the other smoothing down your thigh as you both steadied yourselves.

“happy birthday,” you breathed, voice hoarse, cheeks flushed.

joel kissed your shoulder, still catching his breath. “best fuckin’ gift i ever got.”

you laughed softly, fixing your clothes while he grabbed paper towels, cleaning you up with more tenderness than you deserved after what you’d just done in a public bathroom.

he kissed your temple before unlocking the door.

ellie was standing right outside, mid-step, holding a cupcake.

she froze.

you froze.

joel didn’t freeze.

ellie blinked, looked between the two of you.

“okay…”

she cleared her throat. “i was just… uh… looking for you guys. it’s time to open presents.”

her eyes narrowed slightly. you could feel her putting it together. and then just as quickly, she turned on her heel, muttering something that sounded like, “nope. not my business.”

joel slipped an arm around your waist like he hadn’t just fucked you up against a bathroom sink. “let’s go, sweetheart.”

you followed on shaky legs, cheeks blazing.

as you reached the table, joel bent close and whispered something againsts your ear.

“after i unwrap these presents, i’m gonna unwrap you at home.”

back at the table, no one seemed to notice your slightly-too-fast heartbeat or joel’s smug silence.

“long line,” you muttered to no one in particular, grabbing your drink just to have something to do with your hands.

joel just smirked, settled back in his seat and under the table, his hand found your thigh.

and squeezed.

you nearly knocked your glass over.

then, his eyes dipped to your collarbone. his smile grew.

“didn’t cover that up too well,” he murmured, voice low enough only you could hear. “right there.”

his fingers brushed your neck to point it out.

your hand flew to your throat and you yanked your hair over the mark.

joel chuckled softly, leaning in just enough for his words to curl like smoke against your skin.

“gonna leave another one to match.”

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right4you · 2 months ago

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You belong with me. 💚💛💜❤️🩵🖤

Letter on my site :)

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right4you · 2 months ago

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getting Joel's name tattooed

warnings: big age gap (unspecified), dom!Joel, Joel likes the idea of everyone seeing his name on you, oral (fem!receiving), praise kink, claim kink (?), Joel calls reader “kid”/“kiddo”

note: Here's just a quick something to distract you all from the fact that I haven't posted a oneshot in two months. Enjoy! (Also, don't get people's names tattooed on your body without asking them first, this could seriously backfire. Or do what you want, I'm not your mother.)

Joel doesn’t dislike tattoos, but he never really cared for them either — he’s not one to make a fuss about his looks and likes you best just the way you are (or so he thinks)

It’s been rough, convincing your parents Joel isn’t a pervert for being with you (he is a pervert, but they don’t have to know about that), and you know Joel finds it hard to just walk down the street with you, thinking he’s ruining your life with his age and the hateful looks it attracts

It never bothered you much, which you tell him again and again, and though he let’s it go after a while, there’s still the occasional You sure you want me pickin’ you up from that? when you have a work event or something else Joel deems himself unworthy of attending

It’s unlike you to do something this drastic, this permanent, but in a way, that’s what your relationship to Joel is — drastic and permanent. There’s no going back from it, you don’t think you’ll ever want anything else

So you make the appointment, send the artist the design you want, tell Joel you’re going for brunch with your friends, let him kiss you gently and wonder if he’d stop you walking out the door if he knew what you’re about to do

You choose the placement on your hip, because it’s inconspicuous enough not to fuel Joel’s guilt, because other people would rarely be able to see it, and because you know how much Joel likes having you in his lap, his wide palms caressing that very spot

When you get home, he’s in his workshop, glasses low on his nose, carving away at yet another farm animal — he says he does it because it’s soothing, but you have the suspicion he’s hoping one of these days his load will take, and there’ll be a child to play with those animals sooner than later

I’ve got a surprise for you, you tell him, your hands massaging his powerful shoulders, and he puts down his tool and glasses, giving you his full attention. You gotta promise not to get mad, though.

Better not be one of those sour candies you gave me last time, because my tongue hasn’t been the same since, Joel answers, but when he sees you chewing on your bottom lip, the amusement seeps out of his voice. Won’t get mad, kid, I promise.

You believe him — there hasn’t been an angry man in your home since you moved out of your childhood home — so you pop open the button of your skirt, staring down at Joel. He clears his throat. Definitely not gettin’ mad, he mumbles, watching your hands pulling down the fabric. It slides of easily, you were supposed to wear something lose, so as not to irritate your healing skin

Joel’s eyes go wide when he sees the tattoo, the small, artful letters right above the waistband of your panties: Joel. You watch him swallow, his hands coming up to your hips, not touching the tattoo, but holding you as if to examine you more closely

Fucking Christ, he swears, his thumb drawing absentminded circles on your skin, you can’t be serious, angel. You’re fuckin’ with me.

You tell him you aren’t, that you’re serious about this, about him and his claim on you.

But…people will see, he mutters, eyes still glued to your skin, the top of his head all salt n pepper from your perspective. I want them to, you answer, and Joel looks up. You can see he's starting to believe you when you tell him you're his forever.

Joel spreads his big hand over your hips, tugs you closer, so that his nose is almost brushing your skin, and before he can kiss it, you thread your fingers through his hair and pull his head away.

It's got to heal, you explain, and Joel seems like he doesn't care for a moment, like he wants to ravage you anyway and risk an infection, but then his expression softens, and he slips his thick fingers under the waistband of your cotton panties

Well, I'm gonna touch my girl anyway, he growls, and tugs your panties down, his mouth latching onto your skin almost immediately. His beard scratches over your tummy, as he kisses you all over, mouth hot and wet, and so insistent

His hands grip your flesh hard, as if to keep you from moving away, but he's careful not to touch the little artwork on your hip

When he finally grazes your clit with his teeth, carefully, softly, your hips buck and your knees almost give out, but he holds you up

You stay right where you are, kiddo, I'm not done with you, Joel says into the skin right above your mound, and this more than anything sets your tummy on fire. He knows you'll do whatever he says, treats you like you're his, because you are – branded proof of it is healing on your hip.

So you let him move a hand to your folds, two fingers gathering the slick mess that's beginning to pool there, his touch almost playful.

He sucks on your clit as he sinks two thick fingers into your heat, curling them and forcing you to stay upright, when you almost sink down onto his lap. He could touch you like this easily without you standing in front of him, the muscles in your thighs quivering, but when you look down, his eyes are glued to his name right next to his hand.

The pleasure he gives you is merciless, and you can't help whimpers from escaping your mouth as he curls his fingers repeatedly, more than he moves them in and out of you

Go on, sweetheart, but tell me who you belong to first, he drawls softly, making your stomach flutter and clench.

You, Joel, you moan, and with another practiced movement of his fingers, you're coming on Joel's hand, unravelling while standing up, your legs shaking but unable to give in with how tightly Joel is gripping you and holding you up

Good girl, he praises, and you flutter around him again, as he drags his fingers out of you slowly, eyes on your new tattoo

How long does that take to heal? I gotta coat it in my cum, baby

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right4you · 3 months ago

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HOLY SHIT

HOPEFULLY GRANDPA JOEL IS COMING (on me)

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right4you · 3 months ago

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DESPERATE CRY FOR HELP!!!

UPDATE - someone found it for me 😛 creep it real on Ao3 by swiftispunk13

(Linked in the comments)

I’m looking for a fic I read back in October. It’s a Joel Miller x reader. I believe it’s set during Halloween, her dad throws a party and she’s in costume. Joel is attracted to her and they hook up but her identity gets revealed and he’s like we shouldn’t do this but they do it anyway.

Does it sound familiar I went through my likes and reposts and I can’t find it😭

#joel miller #joel the last of us #joel x reader #joel tlou #the last of us #joel miller dbf #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller one shot #pedro pascal

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right4you · 3 months ago

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I Like it, I Love It

I want some more of it

I try so hard, I can't rise above it

I don't know what it is 'bout that little girl's lovin'

But I like it, I love it, I want some more of it

Summary: Joel Miller knew he was going to hell. And if he wasn't sure before, he knew it for certain now. Especially when he picked you up and you were wearing that tiny denim skirt and your cowgirl boots. You’re half his age, and he’s old enough to know better. But with your fingers laced through his and that bright, infectious smile, he finally starts to forget the guilt and the shame. He might even let himself have fun. || smut MDNI 18+, also fluff, girthy (but legal!) age gap, rodeo / fair date, summer romance, no outbreak, Joel POV, shy!joel, soft!joel, new relationship, reader isn't a virgin but its her first time with joel, reader is afab, smallchested!reader, reader is a lil insecure of her body, slightly angsty!joel, he's feelin' guilty, joel miller is down bad, older!bf, car sex, pinv, praise kink, nipple play, nipple orgasm 👀, fingering, grinding, riding, a lot of kissing (like a lot), picture whichever joel you prefer, 'daddy' mentioned but no daddy kink, size difference || all my love to @littlcdarlin for our filthy discussions of tiny titties and joel miller loving you in a mini skirt. also of course @cavillscurls who has also helped me with ideas for this! y'all are filthy pervs just like me :)

Joel Miller had made peace with the idea of going to hell a long time ago.

The air smelled like fried dough and horses as you scampered ahead, all bounce and bright energy, the summer heat curling around your shoulders. There was a hum of excitement in the fairgrounds even from a distance, something charged and electric that settled deep in his chest, though he knew it had less to do with the lights and music and more to do with you.

You made your way in a tiny denim skirt, cowgirl boots kicking up dust, legs long and golden in the sun. All smooth, soft skin begging to be touched. And Joel figured, yeah, his seat in the fiery pit was reserved and waiting.

And touched you he had, just a little, just a polite hand on your knee during the ride over. He caught the way you glanced at him, the way your fingers twitched like you were tempted to take his hand and move it up your thigh yourself. You wanted more, and he did too. But he hadn’t crossed that line. Not yet.

Because Joel was a gentleman, or at least trying hard to be one. You were only a couple of months into… whatever this was. Dating? Seeing each other? Going steady? You hadn’t defined it and Joel hadn’t asked, partly because he was terrified if he put a name to it, it might fall apart, and partly because he still couldn’t quite believe you were even here with him. That a girl like you had looked his way in the first place. Most days, he felt like a man trying to catch lightning in a bottle, grateful but always expecting it to slip out of his hands.

Still, the guilt sat just behind the thrill. You were young. Young enough that he should know better. He could see it in the way people looked at you, the way they looked at him when you were together. Sometimes he felt himself spiraling a little, late at night when he was alone, wondering what the hell he was doing letting a girl like you anywhere near him.

Up ahead, you grabbed a spot in the ticket line and turned back to him with that familiar light in your eyes, the kind that made it impossible not to smile back. Joel caught up, slow and steady behind you, hands in his pockets, already fighting the urge to touch you again.

“Before I get too distracted, we need a plan,” you said as you moved up a step. You glanced at the handful of people still ahead in line, then turned to face him fully, eyes bright and serious in that teasing way of yours. “What do you wanna see?”

Joel shrugged, more interested in the way your lips curved up than in any of the rides or games. “What do you wanna see?”

You held up a hand, ticking off your demands. “Spray and Race game. I will be kicking your ass at that, by the way.”

Joel nodded, amused.

“And then we have to see the barrel racing, obviously. Can’t come to the fair and not watch a bunch of cowboys do their thing. That would be criminal. Oh, and if I don’t get either funnel cake or kettle corn by the time we leave, I will riot.”

“Can’t have that,” Joel said, letting a chuckle slip out as he rested his hand on the small of your back, guiding you gently forward with the line.

You looked up at him again, smiling like you couldn’t help yourself. “Okay, but seriously, what do you wanna do?”

Joel shrugged, easy. “I’m happy doin’ whatever makes you happy, baby.”

You rolled your eyes, grinning despite yourself. “Cornball.”

He kissed your hairline gently and you stepped up as the ticket booth opened.

“Two, please,” you said, cheerful as anything, leaning your elbows on the wooden counter.

The woman behind the plexiglass had a kind face, her cheeks round and flushed, oversized glasses magnifying her eyes making them look cartoonish. She gave you a warm, buttery smile as she slid the tickets toward you.

“Here you go, dear,” she said sweetly. “Y’all enjoy the fair now.”

Joel reached into his pocket to pay and slid a couple bills across the counter. Before he could tuck his wallet away, you turned, leaned up, and kissed him on the corner of his mouth in quiet thanks. It was just a soft, grateful thing, casual and comfortable. Nothing out of the ordinary for two people dating.

But Joel saw the woman’s energy shift in real time from sweet to surprised. Her smile faltered like it had hit a pothole, and her eyes went sharp.

Joel flushed to the tips of his ears, but you were already thanking her, plucking the tickets from her hand like nothing had happened.

And just like that, you were off again, sunlight on your shoulders, tickets in hand, skirt swaying as you moved toward the fairgrounds. Joel smiled politely at the woman who was now fully glaring daggers into him, and he turned to follow you.

“This thing is rigged!” you huffed, letting go of the water gun with an exaggerated sigh.

The plastic clown stared back at you with its chipped paint and smug little smirk, like it knew exactly how badly you’d missed the mark. You crossed your arms, glaring at it as Joel laughed behind you, the sound low and warm in his chest.

He wasn’t laughing at you, not really. There was too much affection in it. He was caught somewhere between loving the look of focused frustration scrunched between your brows and fighting off the sudden urge to win you the biggest stuffed animal at the booth, just to see your face light up again.

So he stepped forward, doubts flaring in his gut for half a second before he shoved them down and moved in close behind you.

Slowly, carefully, he leaned forward.

His chest met your back first, solid and warm, and you stayed still as you let him fit behind you like a puzzle piece, with his legs bracketing yours, close enough that his knees brushed the backs of your thighs. When he bent over you, the hem of your skirt shifted just enough for the soft curve of you to press against the front of his jeans. He clenched his jaw, eyes locked on the clown’s face, trying like hell not to focus on how good you felt against him.

He raised his hands, letting them hover a moment before easing them down, covering your smaller ones with his own. His palms were wide and rough, fingers slipping into the empty spaces between yours until you were surrounded by him, snug in his arms, your hands now steadied on the plastic grip of the water gun.

Your next breath was sharp and audible. He felt it echo in his ribs.

He adjusted your grip on the plastic gun, his hands never leaving yours, “Let me show you how it’s done,” he murmured, voice low near your ear, and he felt the reaction ripple through you.

Your arms tensed at first, then softened, and he could see the goosebumps rising along your skin, catching the light.

He probably shouldn’t have enjoyed that as much as he did. Probably shouldn’t have let his lips graze the shell of your ear. But he was already in it now, already pressed against you, mind foggy as the smell of your vanilla perfume invaded his senses.

“Deep breath in,” he said, quieter this time, watching the way your lips parted as you listened, your chest rising beneath his. “Slow breath out.”

He swallowed hard, trying not to think about how natural this felt. How right. He focused on the target instead. The clown, the ridiculous game.

“Gotta squeeze the trigger like you love it.” he murmured.

You let out a quiet, breathless laugh, but you didn’t pull away. If anything, you moved back into him, and he felt the swell of your ass push into his lap even more.

But before he could react to the feeling of your warm body pushing into his, the starting bell rang, loud and shrill, snapping both of you into motion. Joel pressed his finger over yours on the trigger, guiding the plastic gun with a steady grip. Water sprayed clean and fast, hitting the target right in the center.

You gasped softly, maybe surprised it was working, maybe still recovering from how close he was. Joel kept his focus, eyes on the game, though it was damn near impossible with the way you felt against him.

“Gentle, steady now,” he said when he felt your aim start to slip, adjusting your elbow with a nudge.

The buzzer went off a second later, a shrill little chime of victory as the clown’s mouth filled and your light blinked bright red at the top of the board. You’d won–first place, of course.

Joel eased back, slower than necessary. His hands lingered a second too long on your waist before he finally stepped away, the heat of you still clinging to him even as you turned with wide eyes and a grin that could’ve leveled him.

“I won?” you said, eyes lit up, like you couldn’t quite believe it.

He nodded, watching you, unable to look away. “You won.”

You picked out a prize without hesitation, grabbing the biggest, fluffiest looking stuffed animal on the rack and hugging it tight to your chest. Joel didn’t even care what it was. All he saw was your face, still flushed from the game, eyes shining, mouth curved in that soft, teasing way you got when you were proud of yourself.

The day stretched long in that golden, syrupy way only Texas summers could manage. The kind that made the day feel like it went too fast and too slow all at once. Joel let you lead him from one booth to the next, happy to be tugged along whether you were forcing a cowboy hat onto his head or pressing cotton candy to his lips. It was far too sweet for him, but he still smiled and shared bites with you, watching the sugar dissolve on your tongue. But it wasn’t the thought of his teeth rotting that did him in that day. No, it was the taste of your lips when you leaned into him, sticky-sweet and warm as you kissed him again and again, always grateful for buying you whatever you asked for.

Later, at the rodeo arena, you led him up into the metal bleachers with a half-finished bag of kettle corn tucked under one arm and your stuffed bear you won in the other. The crowd buzzed around you, cheering and stomping as the barrel racers burst out into the dirt, all speed and muscle. Bulls followed, snorting and kicking against the reins, the announcer’s voice booming over the speakers like thunder rolling through a canyon.

At some point, you shifted. Instead of sitting beside him with your legs stretched out straight like everyone else, you turned and draped them across his lap. Your thighs settled on him, warm and bare, boots dangling off the other side of his legs. You leaned back on your palms, smiling up at him like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Joel rested his hand on your knee without thinking, like it was second nature now. But something in his chest shifted, slow and deep. Watching you watch the riders, your body relaxed and fully at ease in his, he felt it settle into place like a quiet truth.

You wanted this. Not just the fair or the games or the sugar highs. This. Him. His hand on your knee. Your legs over his lap. Your lips on his in front of a crowd that might judge the way you looked at him—an older man, years and miles ahead of you. But you didn’t care. You wanted people to see. Wanted them to know he was yours.

And Joel wasn’t sure what the hell to do with that. With the quiet, aching certainty that you didn’t give a damn what anyone thought. That you wanted him, plain and simple. Because the truth, the part he couldn’t shake no matter how sweet this all felt, was that he wasn’t sure he deserved it.

He was too old. Not just in birthdays, but in body and mind. Every morning he woke up sore in places he didn’t used to notice. He needed two cups of coffee before his brain even came online. He’d lived more lives than he wanted to admit, made more mistakes than he knew how to name.

And still, here you were. Laid up across him like it was the only place you belonged. Smiling up at him like he hung the damn moon.

He swallowed hard and looked down at your knee beneath his hand. Your skin warm, your body settled into his like you’d been doing it for years.

You were real. This was real.

And maybe… just maybe, he was allowed to want it, too. Even if he was still trying to believe he had a right to.

By the time the sun finally dipped beneath the horizon, the fairgrounds glowed with soft light, strung bulbs swaying between posts and tents, flickering like lightning bugs trapped in glass. The air had cooled, but instead of slowing down, you pulled Joel into a wooden building near the edge of the fairgrounds with a painted sign outside on the windows that said:

Swing Dancing Tonight: Live Band!

Joel followed you inside, the bar buzzing with life as people line danced on the floor, women and men alike to an old honky tonk song. The band was lively and energizing as he ordered you drinks at the bar. But before he could even hand you yours, you were already in the middle of the dance floor. So he sipped his beer, watching you sway and stomp to the song. He could watch you like this for hours, thumbs in your belt loops, hips swaying to the rhythm as the drums beat through his chest. He watched how your legs moved, long and shining in the bar light, the way your skirt hugged your hips so perfectly as you turned, giving him the perfect view of you. You were all confidence and charm, laughter rising over the music as you spun yourself in a circle or stepped just slightly out of time.

Then, the song ended, and another started. One he actually recognized.

Spent 48 dollars last night at the county fair

I throwed out my shoulder, but I won her that teddy bear…

“Joel,” you said, breathless and bright, pointing at him with one hand and waving him over with the other. “You know this one, don’t you?”

She's got me sayin' "Sugar Pie", "Honey", "Darlin'", and "Dear"

I ain't seen the Braves play a game all year

He felt a grin twitch at the edge of his mouth but didn’t move. Just shook his head slightly and kept his arms folded over his chest.

Your face scrunched into the kind of pout that always worked on him. “Aw, come on,” you pleaded, stepping closer. “Come dance. Please?”

Joel glanced around. The room was full of couples—young people, mostly, folks your age with their arms around each other, moving with an easy rhythm. There were a few older couples too, clinging close, still smiling like they remembered falling in love every time the music hit them just right. Joel didn’t see anyone else who looked like you and him. The difference in age stuck out like a sore thumb. He knew how it looked. He always knew.

But then he looked back at you.

The way you were beaming at him, not caring who was watching. Not ashamed or holding back. You wanted him, wanted to dance with him, here, now, in front of all these strangers, like none of it mattered.

I'm gonna get fired if I don't get some sleep

My long lost buddies say I'm getting in too deep

He exhaled slowly, then dropped his arms and nodded. “Alright.”

You lit up, grabbing his hands and leading him to the floor, smiling wide as you pulled him into place. His hand found your waist and your hand curled into his, small and warm. You were already moving before he had a chance to think. He stumbled through the first few beats, stepping left when he should have gone right, but you didn’t mind. You were giggling, swinging your hips and mouthing the words to the song like it was written just for you.

But I like it, I love it, I want some more of it

I try so hard, I can’t rise above it…

Joel watched you, half focused on the dance, half lost in the way your smile grew wider each time he got it right. And he did get it right, eventually. Something about the rhythm caught him. Something about your fingers tightening just slightly in his hand each time the music swelled.

Don't know what it is 'bout that little girl's lovin'

But I like it, I love it, I want some more of it

He spun you around, and when you landed back in his arms, you pressed in a little closer, looking up at him with flushed cheeks and something soft in your eyes. Joel felt the guilt unravel a little more. It didn’t disappear, but for the first time that day, he stopped listening to the nagging voice in his head that told him he was no good for you.

Then a tap on your shoulder pulled him out of it.

“Excuse me,” a voice said.

Joel turned, keeping one arm around your waist. You paused too, breath catching in your chest from the last spin. A man stood just beside the two of you. Tall, dressed in boots too clean for real ranch work, and smiling a little too confidently.

“Can I help you?” you asked politely, eyebrows lifting.

The man looked between you and Joel, then nodded toward you.

“I was wonderin’ if I might steal you from your daddy for a dance.”

Joel felt your spine straighten where his hand laid across it. His jaw tightened, but he said nothing. He waited for your reaction. Because, after all, this young man was closer to your age and seemed like someone you should be dancing with if it wasn’t for him.

“No thanks,” you said, sweet as anything. “I’m perfectly happy to keep dancin’ with my daddy.”

And when you turned to Joel smiling, it was with a wink. Surely not very subtle, and not in the least bit shy. His stomach flipped. He might’ve choked on the word if he hadn’t been too focused on keeping his mouth shut and his hands respectful.

The man blinked, frowned, then gave a quick nod before turning back toward the crowd.

Once he was gone, you turned back into Joel, your hands finding his chest again, your grin sharp.

“So rude.” you shook your head with a little grin.

Joel chuckled low in his throat. “Poor kid’s probably off pouting after bein’ turned down by a pretty thing like you.”

You laughed, eyes bright. “Well, maybe next time he’ll think twice before trying to cut in.”

Joel raised an eyebrow. “Next time?”

You leaned in, “You think I’m lettin’ anyone else dance with me tonight?”

He didn’t get the chance to answer before you moved in even closer, lips just shy of his.

“Why don’t we make sure everyone in this place knows exactly how much I like my daddy, huh?”

And then your mouth was on his.

Your hands slipped into the hair at the nape of his neck, nails grazing skin, tugging just enough to make his knees want to give. Your lips were hot, certain, hungry, certainly not the casual kind of kiss you gave him earlier in the day, out on the fairgrounds, sweet and easy in thanks.

No, this was all for him, a kiss with weight behind it. With purpose and damn near possession.

Joel’s hands slid around your waist, fingers pressing into the small of your back. He pulled you close, pressed his mouth harder against yours like he was drowning and you were the only air he had left. The music thumped somewhere in the background, but he barely registered it. You were all he could taste. Sugar and sweat and something warm that settled heavy in his chest.

You broke the kiss eventually, barely, breath brushing over his lips as you smiled.

“Think they got the message?” you asked, smug and breathless.

Joel gave a low laugh. “Not sure. Might need to run it by ‘em again.”

And then he was kissing you all over again.

Eventually, the music wound down and the last of the dancers trickled out. Voices quieted, boots scuffed across the old floorboards toward the exit, and the warm hum of the fair outside dimmed to a gentle hush. The tents had started closing down, lights blinking off one by one, vendors packing up what was left of the night. It was quieter now, the energy settling like dust in the air, and Joel walked beside you back toward the parking lot, your fingers looped loosely in his.

The moon was high and clear, silver light stretching over the dirt and gravel. The air had cooled just enough to feel like relief after a day of heat and sun, and the scent of fried dough and hay still hung faint on the breeze.

He opened the passenger door for you, helping you up with a hand at your waist before closing it gently behind you. Then he circled around, climbed into the driver’s seat with a low groan in his knees, and exhaled hard as the silence wrapped around the two of you.

“I had a lot of fun today,” you said, voice soft in the quiet, eyes turned toward him as you set your teddy bear in the back seat.

Joel looked over with a slow, tired smile curling on his mouth. “Me too, baby.”

He leaned across the console and tipped his chin up slightly, looking down at your mouth, just to invite you in. He meant for it to be a quick kiss. A thank you. Something simple.

But the moment your lips touched his, it was anything but a simple kiss goodnight.

You lingered, lips warm and sweet, your mouth soft against his, your hand rising to his jaw, nails grazing over the rough edge of his beard, and Joel shivered, a quiet sound catching in his throat.

He didn’t dare move, not when you deepened the kiss like that, the press of your lips firmer, the way you breathed into him like you were trying to get as close as you could. Your tongue slipped forward, slow and teasing, and Joel swore his heart damn near stopped.

He lifted his hand to cup your cheek, fingers spread along your smooth jaw, and tilted your face to kiss you fuller. Your lips parted for him, welcoming, and when his tongue met yours, you gave the softest little gasp, like it startled something in you.

Then you shifted closer and he barely had time to register it before your hand braced against his chest and you pushed, guiding him back into his seat. His breath caught, pulse thudding in his neck as you climbed into his lap, straddling him like you’d done it a hundred times. Your knees pressed into the leather on either side of him, the denim of your skirt hiking up just enough to make him dizzy.

“Baby, what’re—” he started, voice rough, but the question never made it past his mouth. Because then you were kissing him, really kissing him, and everything else seemed to disappear.

Your hands slid up into his hair, fingers tugging gently, grounding yourself as your mouth moved over his with something between hunger and certainty. You were warm and pliant against him, chest brushing his, thighs squeezing around his hips. His head spun with the closeness, the heat, the soft weight of you in his lap.

You’d done this before, though it was all you’d done together, all the kissing and heavy petting to last a lifetime. Joel was content with it, never wanting to push for more. His hands found your waist, steadying you there, not to stop you, but partially to feel you, partially to anchor himself. You moved with a slow rhythm, your body pressing in, every little shift setting him further on edge. You kissed him deeper and hungrier with each passing moment.

His fingers flexed against your sides. You were already breathing hard, your mouth dragging over his, then down to his jaw, where you pressed a few kisses there too, so soft and addictive. Joel tipped his head back against the seat, eyes half-lidded, and let himself feel it.

The truck windows were already fogging up from the heat between you. Sweat prickled at the base of his neck and your thighs were warm around him, your hands still tangled in his hair, and when you whispered his name against his lips between kisses, he felt the restraint in him begin to fray.

But when you pulled away to press your forehead into his, he saw the furrow in your brows, the pained look across your face as you spoke for the first time.

“Please, Joel,” you breathed into his mouth, lips wet against his, soft and trembling with want. “I’m ready. I want you.”

The words cut through the haze in his skull like a hot knife. He pulled back just enough to look at you, hands rising to cradle your face, his thumbs resting beneath your jaw. His calloused fingers tilted your head gently, angling you toward the windshield where the streetlamp's glow filtered through the dusty glass. He needed to see your face, to find your gaze and to know you were sure. Your eyes were half-lidded, pupils blown wide, lips parted and swollen from his kiss. You looked like sin incarnate, lit up in the dim streetlamps, and it made something deep inside him curl and twist and clench.

“Baby…” he murmured in warning, his voice barely holding together. He wasn’t sure how long he could keep telling you no.

But you didn’t look uncertain. Not even close. Your fingers dug into the front of his shirt, clinging to the fabric like it might disappear if you let go, and then your hips rolled forward, grinding into the hard, aching shape of him beneath his jeans. He swallowed hard, trying to hold on to reason, but the friction sent a jolt through him that scrambled every logical thought.

“I mean it,” you said, voice cracking open with need. “I need it so badly. Need you.”

He studied your face, silent, trying like hell to slow the blood roaring in his ears. There was a flicker of hesitation—one that made his heart stutter—but it wasn’t yours. It was his. Because deep down, Joel knew he should stop this. Knew he should say something responsible, something like let’s wait, this ain’t the place, I don’t wanna rush you. We should wait til we get you home. Something that would make him a better man than the one currently hard and straining beneath your thighs.

He couldn’t stop the wriggling worm in the back of his head that kept telling him you were younger. Too young for him. But you were looking at him like he was the answer to every ache in your body, like you had no idea what you were getting yourself into. That look alone was almost enough to make him want to stop this entirely. Almost.

But then your mouth found his again, and you moaned into the kiss, and whatever was left of his restraint dissolved under the heat of your breath. You sounded like you were made to fall apart for him. You felt like a fever in his arms, your skin hot and soft and flushed. And he wasn’t strong enough to let go.

“Christ,” he muttered, and his hands slid down from your face back to your waist, pulling you tighter into his lap. The denim of your skirt had already hiked up too far, bunched high on your hips as you straddled him. He hadn’t been able to stop looking at you all day. Your legs, the way that skirt clung to your curves, the fucking sway of your hips when you walked away from him. Now, with you on top of him, split open around his thighs, skin warm and trembling, it was like every filthy thought he’d buried was clawing to the surface.

And God, the way you moved against him, slow and teasing, your skirt nearly around your waist, the bare stretch of your skin beneath his hands, the greed built up in him even more than ever before. Not just to have, but to see.

He pulled back, just an inch, his voice low and rough. “Can I… see more of you?”

Your breath hitched as you pulled away, and you didn’t answer, not at first. You sat there, cheeks flushed, pupils blown wide, and he was nervous he crossed a line, that this wasn’t what you meant when you said you wanted him. He held his breath, but then, sighing, you nodded, maybe a little too quickly. Reaching for the hem of your top with shaky fingers, you paused as you brought the fabric up halfway, like something caught in your throat.

Joel noticed. “Hey,” he said gently, brushing your wrist with his thumb. “What is it?”

You didn’t meet his eyes when your voice got quiet, “I just… I know I’m not—I mean, I don’t have very big… you know.”

The words barely made it out, and Joel felt something in his chest pull tight. You were still holding your shirt, halfway lifted, frozen.

It was odd, seeing you lose that confidence that you held earlier. He watched you all day, playful and devilish in your flirtations with him. But now, now that it was just you two in the cab of his truck, he was seeing between the lines.

He sat up straighter, his hands steady as he helped you lift it the rest of the way, slow and careful, like peeling back something sacred. He tossed it into the footwell without looking. His focus stayed on the soft curve of your chest rising with each breath, the barest quiver in your chin as you tried not to read his expression too hard.

Joel didn’t say anything right away. He just leaned in and pressed a kiss to your collarbone, then another just beneath it. Gentle, slow, barely-there pecks, all warm and wet and worshipful. He moved along the slope of your neck, your shoulder, tasting skin, breathing you in.

Then he looked up at you, voice quiet but thick.

“What, these?” he said, quiet and low, barely more than a breath. His hands came up, big and warm, palms open as they slid gently to cup you. He wasn’t grabbing or groping, but feeling. Mapping you out. The most beautiful thing he’d ever seen as he let the pads of his fingers learn you one soft inch at a time.

“But look,” Joel cooed, eyes flitting between your eyes and where his hands swallowed you, thumbs brushing lightly along the curves of your breasts. “Look how perfectly they fit in my hands.”

And they did. God, they did. His hands were weathered, rough in a way that made him almost hesitate, but you didn’t flinch or tense under his touch. You watched him, wide-eyed and flushed, your lips parted, chest rising fast beneath his broad hands. He couldn’t stop staring. His big, work-worn hands looked even larger against you, rough knuckles against smooth skin, thumbs grazing tender flesh. The contrast made his pulse spike, his brain full of static.

His hands flexed without thinking, fingers cradling you a little firmer. The weight of you in his palms, the way your body gave under his touch lit something in him that had nothing to do with lust and everything to do with awe. Like this wasn’t just about wanting you. It was about having you trust him enough to let him look at you like this. There was a moment, maybe two, where Joel seemed to freeze in it, torn between restraint and reverence, like he wasn’t sure if he should keep going or just stay like this, memorizing the way you felt in his hands.

You made a soft noise in the back of your throat, a breathy, barely-there whimper when his thumbs grazed your sensitive nipples again, and he felt it like a bolt down his spine.

“You feel that?” he asked, voice thick. “You feel how perfect you are?”

You hesitated at first, fingers fisting into his shirt at the shoulders, then nodded, slow and shaky, and he could tell you were trying to say yes, but the words wouldn’t come. Your hands slid down his arms instead, fingers curling around his biceps as you leaned in closer, your back arching into his touch. Joel could feel the way your hips shifted, how you melted into him inch by inch.

He kissed your neck again, slower this time, then your collarbone, trailing heat with every little peck. Then lower, just a little, until he was brushing his mouth across the swell of your chest. Not hungry or greedy, just gentle, open-mouthed kisses that made you shiver against him.

“Tell me if you want me to stop,” he murmured into your skin, his voice gone hoarse.

You shook your head quickly, and he felt your hands tighten around his arms.

“Not stoppin’,” you whispered, barely audible.

Joel smiled against your skin, and one hand lifted to brush a thumb across your nipple, slow and light, just enough to make your breath catch.

You arched into him then, eyes fluttering shut, your whole body moving without thought, and Joel felt something in his chest crack wide open.

This wasn’t just about convincing you you were beautiful. This was about showing you with every kiss, every touch, every look until you never doubted it again.

He didn’t wait long after you gave him permission, just enough time to kiss his way back up to your jaw, watching the way your mouth stayed slack, your eyes heavy-lidded, drunk on him already. He liked you like this, pliant and sweet and soft. He wanted you out of your head and into your body, melting into his hands and mouth and all the ways he knew how to love someone without saying a word.

Joel dipped his head again, this time without restraint, and took one of your nipples into his mouth. His lips closed around you slow and warm, tongue flicking over the sensitive peak in quick, flat strokes. You gasped, your hands shooting up to grip his hair, hips stuttering forward into his lap as your body twitched under the sudden wave of sensation.

He groaned against your skin, the sound rough and real, because fuck, the way you reacted to him from such a simple touch would damn near ruin him for good.

His hands gripped your waist, steadying you, keeping you anchored as he licked and sucked, teeth just barely grazing before his tongue smoothed over the bite. Your thighs trembled around his hips. You were panting now, your body moving without hesitation, instinct driving you to grind down onto him in slow, desperate rolls.

“Joel,” you breathed, high and quiet, your voice caught between pleasure and disbelief. Your back arched hard, head falling back, spine pulling tight like a bow. “Oh my God—”

He didn’t stop. He moved to your other breast, lavishing just as much attention, his hands sliding up your back to hold you steady while your whole body writhed in his lap. Your hips rolled down again, this time firmer, needier. Joel could feel how soaked you were through your panties, and the friction making his head spin.

You were panting harder now, moaning freely, completely gone, and Joel had no fucking clue how he was keeping his own composure. All he knew was he didn’t want this to stop. He didn’t want to do anything but keep you falling apart right there in his arms. He closed his lips around your nipple again, sucking harder this time, tongue dragging over the sensitive peak before he gave it a sharp, deliberate nip. The sound you made had every ounce of his blood roaring to his cock.

And then he felt you shuddering against him. A full-body, violent, uncontrollable shaking of your limbs as your thighs clamped around his hips, your back arched so hard it looked like it might snap. Your mouth fell open in a silent cry as your whole body seized against him.

And then you collapsed forward, burying your face in his neck, breathing fast, chest heaving.

Joel pulled away and blinked, stunned, his hands still holding you gently in place, too afraid to move.

“…Did you just—?”

You nodded against his neck, laughing, breathless and wide-eyed as you pulled back to look at him.

“I think I did,” you whispered, grinning in awe. “I’ve never… I didn’t know I could do that.”

Joel stared at you like you were the most miraculous thing he’d ever laid eyes on.

His heart was thudding like a drum. His whole body was vibrating with adrenaline and want, but more than that—God, more than that—he was absolutely done for. Completely head-over-heels wrecked by the way you smiled at him, still shaking, still glowing, sitting there on top of him like you belonged nowhere else.

He let out a low laugh, forehead resting against yours, the both of you sweaty and flushed and grinning like idiots.

“That was the most amazin’ thing I think I might’ve ever seen.”

You giggled, brushing your fingers through his sweat damp hair, gaze dipping down to his lips, swollen and wet from everything you’d just shared. Your thumb dragged along his jaw, soft and slow.

“I was serious, you know,” you said, quieter now. The words felt heavier, more deliberate. “I’m ready. If you are.”

The smile tugging at his mouth faded gently, not with worry, but with something more careful, something reverent. He lifted his hand, fingertips tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. His eyes searched yours, wanting to be absolutely sure he’d heard you right.

“You sure?” he asked, voice barely above a whisper. “Here?”

You nodded, biting your lip, and he saw it in your face—you meant it. You weren’t offering it out of heat or thrill or to prove a point. You were giving it because you wanted him. Because this was where you felt safe.

Joel exhaled, slow and shaky, and let his hands drift down to your thighs. He started at your knees, broad palms dragging up the delicate skin, every inch of contact slow and unhurried. When he reached the edge of your skirt, his fingers slipped beneath it, warm and steady, thumbs sweeping along the crease where your legs met your hips.

You were soft and warm. His fingers slid further up, curling around the backs of your thighs, then higher, gripping your ass with both hands and pulling you closer into his lap, only your pair of panties and his denim between the two of you. You gasped into his mouth at the sudden pressure, your hips grinding down against him in a way that nearly made him lose his composure right then and there.

“You looked so damn good today,” he said, pecking you on the lips before breaking away just long enough to speak against your jaw. His voice was thick, hoarse, full of the ache he’d been carrying since the moment he picked you up. “All day, walkin’ around like that, in this little thing... you knew exactly what you were doin’, didn’t you?”

He nipped at your skin, lips brushing over your jaw, the curve of your neck. Your breath caught again, your nails scratching lightly over his chest as you rolled your hips, and he swore under his breath.

“Joel,” you whispered, his name cracked open on your tongue, a whine that made his stomach clench. You were so soft over him, so willing, like you belonged there, like you knew he wouldn’t say no.

“I got you,” he whispered, kissing the underside of your chin, then lower, pressing his mouth to the hollow of your throat. “I got you, baby. Just… tell me what you need.”

“Touch me,” you begged, voice breaking into pieces, desperate and trembling. “Please. More. Just—more.”

He should’ve stopped. Even now. He knew that. This wasn’t some clean-cut moment, some perfect night. You were in the front seat of his truck, in some nowhere parking lot, and he was hard as stone beneath you, pulse hammering behind his ribs like a war drum. But the way you said please, as if asking for something as important as the air in your lungs, shattered the last of his resolve.

His hands moved even further up the back of your thighs, kneading your ass in his thick fingers, pulling you closer to him. His fingertips were nearly touching as they brushed the sides of your lace panties and found the heat of you, the fabric clinging to your pussy as your arousal stuck to the cotton. Every one of his rational thoughts disintegrated. A deep, guttural sound tore from his chest, something raw and entirely outside himself, and his mouth found your collarbone, teeth dragging over the skin, tongue smoothing it over.

You whimpered, the sound muffled as you buried your face in his shoulder, and his hands tightened on your ass, holding you steady as his fingers traced over the damp cotton. He could feel everything through it—every ridge and dip, the soft, swollen lips beneath the fabric, the way you pressed into his touch like your body was trying to pull him inside.

“Jesus,” he muttered, breath stuttering, eyes fluttering closed for a second like the weight of it was too much. “Baby... this all for me?”

You whimpered, burying your face further against his neck, your arms wound around his shoulders now, trying to hold on as his fingers moved with slow pressure over the damp cotton, mapping the shape of you.

With a little more pressure, he dragged his middle finger along the center of the panties, right where he knew you needed it. Your hips jolted, a sharp breath punching out of you, and he kissed and bit gently at your shoulder, trying to stay steady while you ground down on him again.

He slid his fingers beneath the lace from behind, his knuckles grazing your ass, and slipped two fingers through your folds, the heat and slick coating them immediately. The angle was tight, but it didn’t matter. He pushed in slow, groaning deep in his chest as you clenched around him, your whole body going taut.

You gasped, your thighs shaking on either side of his, your hips rocking back to meet the thrust of his fingers. He fucked you slow, steady, letting his palm grind against you with each pass, his other hand still holding you tightly, keeping you flush to him. The sound of your breath, the soft, broken moans, the wet slick of your pussy around his fingers was all too much.

“You make the prettiest little noises, baby girl,” he breathed against your neck, voice low and rough. His tongue dragged along the damp skin there, catching the salt as you moaned under him. “Pussy’s so wet for me, huh?”

You nodded fast, breath hitching as you turned your head, finding his mouth and dragging him into another kiss. It was messy, open, all tongue and teeth. You were already shaking, and then he pushed in a third finger.

You whined, body jerking in his lap, fingers clutching at the front of his shirt like you needed something to hang onto. Your mouth fell open against his, panting into the kiss as he fucked you slow and deep, the stretch overwhelming but perfect.

“Gotta open ‘er up for me,” he murmured against your lips, curling his fingers just right. “Gotta get her ready, alright?”

Your hips rocked harder into him, back arching as you ground your clit into the thick seam of his jeans, chasing friction. The pressure made your thighs tremble. His fingers were thick and relentless, and you were soaked, dripping around him with every push.

“Feels—s-so good,” you mewled, breath broken, voice small and high.

“Yeah, baby?” he smiled, lips brushing your cheek, his free hand gripping your hip tighter to hold you steady. “Tell me.”

“Your fingers are so—god,” you gasped, blinking up at him, tears catching at the corners of your eyes, “so thick, Joel, fuck—filling me up, f-feels so good.”

He groaned, dragging his mouth over your jaw, licking into the curve of your throat as his fingers thrust deeper, curling to stroke that perfect spongey spot. Your entire body tensed in his lap, thighs shaking, your moans getting louder, needier, your hands everywhere now—his neck, his hair, tugging, pulling, clinging.

But then your rhythm shifted. You started grinding harder, faster, hips snapping down against his palm in stuttering, frustrated motions.

Joel felt it the second it changed. The edge in your breath, the heat in your voice.

You whined again, a little sharper now. “Need more.”

His brow lifted, but his fingers didn’t stop. “You got more, baby. Right here. Let me—”

“No,” you cut him off, hips jerking back harder onto his hand. “Not your fingers. I need your cock, Joel.”

His eyes blinked widely at your filthy mouth, but all he could muster was a wrecked groan, low and rough, his jaw locking as he tried to keep himself together. His fingers didn’t stop right away, but they slowed, drawing out the tension just enough to leave you gasping. Your walls clenched around the retreat, your body chasing it even as he pulled away.

“Such a greedy little girl, ain’t ya?” he muttered, voice rougher than he meant, more strained.

He dragged his fingers from you with a wet sound, both of you shivering at the loss. His hands moved to your hips again, gripping tight, dragging you forward until you were pressed flush to him. The thick line of his cock was unmistakable beneath the denim, rock hard and hot through the layers. You gasped as he pulled you against your bare thighs, your panties soaked and clinging.

Even through the denim, it was too much. Your heat, the damp of your panties, the softness of your thighs around him, it all short-circuited whatever thread of self control he was still hanging on to.

Joel’s head tipped back slightly, breath ragged. “Feel that? What you do to me?”

You nodded, a little amused glint back in your eye, though your mouth was still parted and heaving in breaths. You reached down, and he watched as your hands fumbled with his belt, the metal clinking loudly in the truck cab. His fingers dug into the flesh of your hips, just below where your mini skirt bunched up and he could see the pink of your panties, with white lace trim around them. His mind felt like it was buzzing with static.

Joel felt the tug of his belt give, then the pop of the button, the slow scrape of the zipper. He hissed through his teeth as your hand slipped inside, dainty little fingers wrapping around him. So warm and firm, but your grip wasn’t shy, and neither was the way you stroked him once, slow, before pulling him free.

He let out a low, broken sound, his head tipping back against the seat as his hips twitched into your palm. Jesus Christ, he was already leaking, hard as hell, and your soft hand felt like heaven.

He looked down just in time to see your thumb swipe through the wet at the tip, smearing it along the ridge. Your eyes flicked up, lashes heavy, lips parted, and then your tongue slipped out to wet your bottom lip. His eyes narrowed on the sight.

“It’s so… big,” you said, half breathless, caught somewhere between awe and nerves.

He couldn’t help the twitch of a grin, pride low and warm in his gut, but it faded fast when you licked your fingers and brought them back down to him. Joel’s mouth went dry as he watched, wide-eyed, his cock jumping in your grip as you used that spit-slick hand to spread the moisture, dragging it over the head and down the shaft with slow, deliberate strokes. His head hit the backrest again, a low moan escaping him as your hand wrapped fully around him. He was pulsing under your touch, every vein thick and straining, and all he could do was grip the seat with one hand and brace his other on your thigh.

His breath caught as you lined him up, the swollen head of his cock notched against your entrance, slick heat already soaking him. His hands flew up to your hips, fingers curling into your skin tight. He looked up at you, chest rising hard beneath his shirt.

“Fuck,” he managed, voice shredded. “Baby, take it slow. Alright?”

You nodded, teeth sunk into your bottom lip, and began to lower yourself down on him.

It was hell and heaven all at once.

He’d never felt bliss like this before. You were so tight, so velvety and wet and welcoming to his cock. He forced himself to keep his eyes open even as they drooped heavily, needing to see you. He watched your jaw slacken, your eyes roll back and your lashes flutter shut, the way your neck arched back at the feeling of him filling you completely.

If you didn’t take this slow, he was going to embarrass himself. Two pumps, and it’d be over.

“You okay?” he rasped, voice hoarse and frayed, trying to keep his focus on your face, not the overwhelming squeeze of your walls around his cock.

You nodded, still dazed, still adjusting to the stretch. He watched your hands slide up his chest for balance, fingers fisting the fabric of his shirt.

“So… so full,” you whispered.

Joel groaned, his eyes squeezing shut for just a second. “You feel like heaven, baby. Fuck. Can’t—can’t move just yet.”

He breathed through his nose, short and hard, jaw clenched tight as he fought to stay still. Your walls kept fluttering around him, tightening every time you shifted. He could feel every tiny twitch, every squeeze, and it was sending his brain sideways.

You shifted your hips once, just a little roll of them, and his body jerked.

“Jesus Christ,” he bit out, thumbs digging into the soft flesh above your hips. “You’re gonna kill me.”

You grinned, a soft chuckle escaping, voice high and breathless, and gave another little roll, just enough to make him groan again.

“Not trying to,” you said sweetly, rocking just once more, a little deeper this time, “but you feel so good, Joel. So deep.”

Your hips rolled again, slower this time, deeper, and Joel’s whole body tensed under you like a live wire. He hissed through his teeth, hands sliding down to grip the plush curve of your ass, thumbs digging in as he tried to ground himself, to breathe, but Jesus, it was like you were made to ruin him.

“Fuck, that’s it,” he gritted, watching the way your body moved over his, the way your thighs flexed as you lifted up and sank back down, taking him in inch by inch. “Just like that, baby. You’re doin’ so good.”

You moaned, a soft, desperate sound that made his head spin, and then you started to move in earnest, just slow at first, a grind that let you feel every ridge of him, every twitch and pulse as your slick walls dragged along his cock. His jaw clenched, hips rising to meet yours on every stroke, and then you found your rhythm.

Up, down, harder, faster. Until the sound of skin of skin filled the cab of the truck, your breathless moans and his gritted grunts, all a symphony of the sweetest sounds he’d ever heard.

Joel could barely think. All he could do was feel—your heat, your slick, the way you clenched around him tighter with every bounce. His hands never stopped moving, guiding you, holding you open for him, sliding up your back, your waist, gripping anywhere he could find.

“That’s it, baby girl,” he said, mouth hot against your throat. “Look at you, pretty little thing, ridin’ me so good,”

You whined, nails digging into his shoulders as you bounced harder, grinding down between strokes, chasing it now. Joel felt you start to shake, the rhythm turning erratic, frantic, your breath coming faster as your thighs quivered on either side of him.

“My good girl,” he rasped, barely able to get the words out, his lips brushing your jaw, his voice thick with everything you were pulling out of him. “Takin’ your old man’s cock like it was made for ya, huh?”

You cried out, the sound catching in your throat as your head fell forward onto his shoulder.

“That’s it, atta girl,” he growled, hands locking down on your hips now, helping you ride him, thrusting up to meet you with punishing force.

You were trembling in his lap, gasping his name again and again, every breath broken, every moan more high-pitched than the last. He felt the change in the way your walls fluttered around him, the way your legs started to give out, and he knew you were close.

“Gonna come for me again, hm?” he whispered, lips finding your chest as you pushed back up, a look of bliss and agony on your face when his tongue lapped at your nipple before taking it in his mouth, teeth scraping until he let it go with a pop as he said, “Come on, baby girl. Let me feel it. Wanna feel your sweet pussy squeeze the life outta me,”

Your body tensed hard as he took your other nipple between his teeth. Your back arched, your mouth dropped open as you cried out his name.

Joel felt it in the way you clamped around him, how your whole body seized and shook, how the heat of you spread and pulsed around his cock. He didn’t stop his tongue on your chest or his heavy thrusts into you. He couldn’t. He chased you through it, fucking you through your orgasm, his rhythm relentless now.

“Good girl,” he groaned, releasing your breast, head tipping back as you convulsed around him. “That’s my girl.”

It’s all he could say, all he could muster up as his blood roared. He knew he was going to leave bruises on your hips with the way he was holding you, his fingers digging deep, guiding you down onto his cock again and again as he fucked up into you, chasing the tight pull in his gut, the pressure building so fast it burned.

Your body was limp against him, boneless and spent, your forehead pressed to the side of his neck, still clenching around him in aftershocks that made his vision blur. He could feel the way you twitched as he pumped into you, cock filling you to the hilt every thrust. He could hear the wet sounds of your slick coating him, and it was pushing him right to the edge.

Maybe it was the sound of his breath, ragged and uneven in your ear, or maybe it was the way his thrusts had started to lose rhythm, hips stuttering beneath the weight of everything building inside him. Whatever it was, you knew.

You shifted, lifting your chest off his and sitting upright in his lap. His eyes opened, dazed and half-lidded, just in time to see you reach for his hands, pulling them from your hips and guiding them up to your chest. You pressed his palms back against your breasts, dragging a soft gasp from him as his fingers curled instinctively around you, thumbs brushing over your nipples.

And then you started to move.

Your hips rocked in a slow, devastating rhythm. Grinding forward, rolling back, twisting just enough to make him feel every flex and clench of your body around his cock. The new angle let him feel you in full, the grip of your pussy tighter than anything he’d ever known, slick and pulsing and dragging him deeper with every shift of your weight.

His eyes locked on you, chest rising hard, muscles taut, and he could barely keep up. He could hardly even breathe.

“Gonna come for me, Joel?” you asked, your voice breathless, raw, and almost sweet in its teasing.

He groaned, hands tightening around your breasts, his fingers twitching as you ground down harder. Your pace picked up just enough to wreck him, every movement drawing him closer to the edge.

“Come on, handsome,” you whispered, leaning in, your breath hot against his cheek. “Know you can. Know you wanna come inside me, don’t you?”

Joel’s whole body seized, the words hitting him like a punch to the gut. He could feel you squeeze around him as you said it. The flutter of your pussy gripping him like you were trying to pull every last bit out of him.

“F-fuck,” he gritted out, “Are y–are you sure, baby?”

He didn’t think he could take any more. But then you reached for one of his hands, lifted it gently, and brought his fingers to your mouth.

“Come for me, Joel,” you whispered, and then you slipped one of his digits into your mouth and hollowed out your cheeks to suck, soft and slow, tongue warm and wet.

And Joel saws stars as he came.

He groaned from deep in his chest, hips bucking up into you as his cock throbbed inside you. His release hit him hard. His hands scrambled for something to hold, one sliding across your waist and thighs, squeezing hard as his vision blurred. The one in your mouth stayed, his other fingers tightening around your jaw and cheeks. Heat coiled through his spine, thick and hot, pouring into you as every muscle in his body tensed and shook.

As he came down, he pulled his hand from your mouth, bringing your body to him, your chest against his and held you close. His forehead pressed to your shoulder, the soft rise and fall of your breathing the only sound between you for a long moment. You stayed wrapped around him, warm and wet and still twitching with aftershocks.

His breath came slow and heavy, chest rising beneath yours as his eyes slipped closed.

“My god,” he muttered, voice worn raw, scraped down to gravel.

You didn’t say anything right away. Just smiled, fingers combing gently through his hair, your body soft and loose in his arms. He felt your lips brush his temple, then his ear, warm and light, and when you shifted, you kissed the tip of his nose.

“That was…” you murmured, smiling against his skin, your fingers still tangled in his hair.

He hummed, a small sound low in his throat, eyes half-lidded, lips curved with something lazy and content.

You leaned down and kissed him again, soft and slow, and his felt cock stirring faintly inside you, twitching in the warmth he hadn’t pulled out of yet.

“Amazing,” you finished, lips brushing his.

Joel could’ve stayed in that moment forever.

His hands were still resting low on your back, fingers splayed wide, thumbs brushing along your spine. He blinked slowly, gaze flicking between your eyes and your mouth, still a little swollen from kissing him stupid.

You tilted your head, smiling like you knew something he didn’t.

“What?” you asked softly, your voice still a little breathless, lips brushing his again.

Joel wasn’t sure where it came from. His mind was fogged with desire, those damn post coitus hormones and having the prettiest girl he’d ever seen his arms. He hadn’t meant to say it out loud. But it echoed from the cavern on his mind until it was screaming to be let out.

“Be my girlfriend?”

You blinked, surprised, but your smile didn’t falter. If anything, it grew, soft and wide and toothy. Your cheeks warmed, and not just from the heat of the truck cab.

“Joel Miller,” you said, sweet and teasing as you pushed a bit of damp hair from his forehead, “are you asking me to be your girlfriend right after blowing my mind in your truck?”

He huffed a laugh, eyes narrowing in mock offense, his grip on you tightening like he didn’t want to let you squirm away from it.

“Well, yeah, suppose I am,” he said, a little more grounded this time, the words settling deeper in his chest. “I mean it.”

You stared at him for a beat longer, still grinning.

“Okay,” you said finally, soft and sure, like it wasn’t even a question. “Yeah. I’m your girl.”

Joel let out a slow breath through his nose, every part of him relaxing under the weight of those simple little words.

I’m your girl.

The smile that broke across his face was unguarded, wide and real, his hand lifting to cup your cheek as your eyes stayed locked on his. You were both grinning now as you brought your forehead to his, lost in it for a long, quiet moment.

Then he pulled you back in, kissing you again slow and deep, like there was nowhere else he’d rather be.

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