rinzsu

[rinzsu]

important news

hi lovelies, it‘s been a while since i last posted something like this. I have decided to quit writing for blue lock and jujutsu kaisen, as well as move blogs again. I have learned from my previous mistakes of deactivating my accounts, which leads to this blog simply being archived. I have made great memories on here and i just cannot bear to throw them all away, and i just know that i will regret loosing all my works on here haha. The reason why i decided to switch fandoms is because I recently fell out of love with the guy that inspired all of my works for the blue lock fandom. With that I also lost my Ideas and Passion to write for the bllk boys.

Something most people probably don‘t know is that I started out writing for the haikyuu fandom. Recently I regained my interest for the series and with that I have found my new inspiration. So you could say I‘m „returning to my roots“ (?). I will continue the event I started during Christmas so everyone who requested something still receives their matchup, as well as post on here once in a while. From now on, I will mainly post on my new blog @tsumiyas and I hope you will accompany me on this new journey.

loads of love, leni <3

originally pinned

[rinzsu]

important news

hi lovelies, it‘s been a while since i last posted something like this. I have decided to quit writing for blue lock and jujutsu kaisen, as well as move blogs again. I have learned from my previous mistakes of deactivating my accounts, which leads to this blog simply being archived. I have made great memories on here and i just cannot bear to throw them all away, and i just know that i will regret loosing all my works on here haha. The reason why i decided to switch fandoms is because I recently fell out of love with the guy that inspired all of my works for the blue lock fandom. With that I also lost my Ideas and Passion to write for the bllk boys.

Something most people probably don‘t know is that I started out writing for the haikyuu fandom. Recently I regained my interest for the series and with that I have found my new inspiration. So you could say I‘m „returning to my roots“ (?). I will continue the event I started during Christmas so everyone who requested something still receives their matchup, as well as post on here once in a while. From now on, I will mainly post on my new blog @tsumiyas and I hope you will accompany me on this new journey.

loads of love, leni <3

originally pinned

[rinzsu]

important news

hi lovelies, it‘s been a while since i last posted something like this. I have decided to quit writing for blue lock and jujutsu kaisen, as well as move blogs again. I have learned from my previous mistakes of deactivating my accounts, which leads to this blog simply being archived. I have made great memories on here and i just cannot bear to throw them all away, and i just know that i will regret loosing all my works on here haha. The reason why i decided to switch fandoms is because I recently fell out of love with the guy that inspired all of my works for the blue lock fandom. With that I also lost my Ideas and Passion to write for the bllk boys.

Something most people probably don‘t know is that I started out writing for the haikyuu fandom. Recently I regained my interest for the series and with that I have found my new inspiration. So you could say I‘m „returning to my roots“ (?). I will continue the event I started during Christmas so everyone who requested something still receives their matchup, as well as post on here once in a while. From now on, I will mainly post on my new blog @tsumiyas and I hope you will accompany me on this new journey.

loads of love, leni <3

originally pinned

[rinzsu]

important news

hi lovelies, it‘s been a while since i last posted something like this. I have decided to quit writing for blue lock and jujutsu kaisen, as well as move blogs again. I have learned from my previous mistakes of deactivating my accounts, which leads to this blog simply being archived. I have made great memories on here and i just cannot bear to throw them all away, and i just know that i will regret loosing all my works on here haha. The reason why i decided to switch fandoms is because I recently fell out of love with the guy that inspired all of my works for the blue lock fandom. With that I also lost my Ideas and Passion to write for the bllk boys.

Something most people probably don‘t know is that I started out writing for the haikyuu fandom. Recently I regained my interest for the series and with that I have found my new inspiration. So you could say I‘m „returning to my roots“ (?). I will continue the event I started during Christmas so everyone who requested something still receives their matchup, as well as post on here once in a while. From now on, I will mainly post on my new blog @tsumiyas and I hope you will accompany me on this new journey.

loads of love, leni <3

originally pinned

[rinzsu]

important news

hi lovelies, it‘s been a while since i last posted something like this. I have decided to quit writing for blue lock and jujutsu kaisen, as well as move blogs again. I have learned from my previous mistakes of deactivating my accounts, which leads to this blog simply being archived. I have made great memories on here and i just cannot bear to throw them all away, and i just know that i will regret loosing all my works on here haha. The reason why i decided to switch fandoms is because I recently fell out of love with the guy that inspired all of my works for the blue lock fandom. With that I also lost my Ideas and Passion to write for the bllk boys.

Something most people probably don‘t know is that I started out writing for the haikyuu fandom. Recently I regained my interest for the series and with that I have found my new inspiration. So you could say I‘m „returning to my roots“ (?). I will continue the event I started during Christmas so everyone who requested something still receives their matchup, as well as post on here once in a while. From now on, I will mainly post on my new blog @tsumiyas and I hope you will accompany me on this new journey.

loads of love, leni <3

originally pinned

[rinzsu]

hihi leni, just saw ur christmas event and omg i would love to join <3 so here is my submission for it 😽:

my name is saki, and my favourite character in blue lock is mikage reo („ᵕᴗᵕ„) !!

genres of music that i like include pop, kpop, r&b and sometimes classical. i don't rly like rap, rock, country and heavy metal—anything that is like loud and messy

my favourite artists include taylor swift, cigarettes after sex, wave to earth, beabadoobee, niki, ive and enhypen !

hehe i hope that's everything i need to include <3 thanks for holding this cute event 🤍🫂

the sound of our love .ᐟ - request no. 3 @yoisami

message from len! hi pookie <3 it’s been,, a while since I last updated this event but here you go. I hope you’re doing well sweets and that the long wait was worth it🤍

now playing..

Beautiful Stranger by Laufey!

why did I choose this song? I picked this song, because when I listened to it, I immediately had a vision in mind haha.

It was a chance encounter, really. You met Reo Mikage on the Subway Train home after an exhausting day at school. That’s when you saw him: eye catching lavender mop of hair, radiant smile and gorgeous eyes. You didn’t recognize his uniform and when you had build up the courage to approach him, you heard the doors open, realizing you had come to your stop. You thought you’d never see him again, that beautiful stranger from the subway train. Well jokes on you, for when Reo Mikage takes a liking to something, or rather someone, he’d do anything to hold it in his grasp. And so, he goes out of his way to take the train home a whole hour later just to see you again.

your playlist!

© rinzsu 2023. plagiarism, translation and distribution of my works out- and inside of tumblr is not permitted.

[rinzsu]

haaa exam 3 out of 4 is finally out of the way! important news and the next "sound of our love"-eventpost scheduled for this sunday!

[rinzsu]

GIRL IM FALLING IN LOVE WITH UR UNIQUE THEME + UR WRITING STYLE I CAN'T, ANYWAYS HAVE GOOD DAY/AFTERNOON/NIGHT!

thank you sweetheart :(( you're so lovely i cannot!! hope you have a great day/night as well and loads of love your way

[rinzsu]

excuse while i take a look at your beautiful theme 🧎🏻‍♀️ IM ON MY KNEES AHHHH NEWJEANS ATE SO BAD

thank you sweets <3 love lovee loveee newjeans!! your illit theme tho ahh it's soo cute i wanna chomp on it!!

[rinzsu]

HI LENI !!! UR THEME !!! I LOVE NEWJEANS !!!

hi bby!! thank youu<3 your theme is so poetic i’m in love!!

[rinzsu]

misalignment (n).

/ˌmɪsəˈlʌɪnm(ə)nt/

the incorrect arrangement or position of something in relation to something else. "in which, mikage reo finds himself both asphyxiated and confined within the unfortunate circumstances of his first love."

contents. mikage reo x gn!reader, unrequited feelings, no happy ending, right person wrong time (i think), reader and reo borderline drunk / wasted, unproofread misery, tiny implication at gaslighting but nothing like that happens, never written unrequited love nor experienced it (can't get rejected if i never confess !!)

Despite the intelligence and academic prowess he had maintained throughout his entire lifetime, Mikage Reo is fundamentally a fool; one who unwisely but desperately deludes himself as a means to remain blind to the truth.

The 'wanna hang out tonight?' text was the flame to his moth, effortlessly attracting him whilst having the full capability to incinerate his very existence, to destroy every part of him.

If years of friendship accompanied by unreciprocated feelings could teach him anything, it was that, to spend time with you, lining up was a prerequisite for Reo.

Free time for you was defined by work's leniency (which seldom seems to happen, but at least you enjoyed it), and the occasional period where you weren't obsessing over a drama or book series.

After that section of the queue, was quite literally everyone else. An invitation from you meant that Yukimiya was too preoccupied with modelling, Rin's overseas, Nagi was too lazy to respond and left you on read, Isagi's busy training, Kunigami's at the gym, and Hiori didn't have the time to travel that far.

Finally there was Reo, back up plan Reo, the friend that you could go to when no one was available; the friend you liked enough to spend time with but not enough to prioritise.

He steals a glance at you as you keenly sip from your glass. Self-hatred chews at his conscience, but the livid, and tired part of him shoos it away.

It's not a very nice thing to accuse one of thinking of another so lowly, especially a close friend, however the explicit signs of him holding little significance in comparison to others seemed to validate it. You and he have been drinking for a while now, without much word other than the 'hello's and quiet greetings when you first saw each other.

It's normal, the silence. It's just how things worked between you and Reo. Neither of you were particularly social, words weren't necessary to enjoy time together, that was one of Reo's favourite things about you.

He's always tired of speaking, having to maintain flawless image, that included appearing as someone sociable and eager to speak with others.

But with you, that expectation was nowhere to be seen.

You're now adults, but this is nothing different from the quiet walks to the bus stop back in high school. The ones where he'd do his best to steal a glance of how you look, soaked within the sunlight while smiling.

Chatter permeates the bar's atmosphere gently a few clinks of glasses can be heard which followed hearty laughter and the occasional cheer.

You're first to talk. "How's university been?"

"Good." Was the workload horrendous? Yes, and so was adulthood in general. Reo knows he has it easy; he can afford it easily and could still live comfortably without working a day in his life. But he still yearns for the same feeling high school had. "Hakuho was fun though."

You place your drink down, swallowing. "I know right? Never thought I'd say this, but I miss high school. It sucked most of the time. But you and the others made it so much better.”

Reo nods, as he gulps down more alcohol. “I miss it too. How has studying been for you?”

You huff. “It’s a lot. I feel like I spend more time studying than doing anything else. But it’s good. I don’t mind since I’m actually studying something I’m passionate about, you know?”

“I’m glad, then.” Reo stares at his whisky, swirling the amber in his glass. “Proud of you. I really am. You’ve come so far, and I just know you’re going to do well.”

Growing from a clueless high schooler to a driven, impassioned, medical student. A lot has changed, years pass yet he remains unloved by you.

God there he goes again, lamenting on his paltriness. It must be a relative of masochism; he could be safe and secure at home with a good book and cup of tea, yet he’s here drinking with the source of his pain, while tethering on the border of being intoxicated with alcohol instead of heartbreak.

With each drink, a wave of euphoria swallows him up, licking up his misery as if it were sand on the shore. Rationality and emotion bicker like seagulls quarrelling over food.

You laugh at his sweet words. “You drunk? Thanks though.”

“Drunk or not, I mean it. Seriously.” Reo knows his limits, but doesn’t bother correcting you. His face feels hot, not because of the soju, but because of you.

You’ve always been pretty, to a ridiculous extent. But absurd how a few years changes you so much. Reo can’t even identify the changes, he just knows you’ve gotten prettier; that his heart races faster whenever he sees you.

“Seriously.” You echo, and nod, and smile. “I miss seeing you every day. School was so much fun with you around.”

Another hasty gulp of soju. Reo can’t stand hearing those words.

I hate you.

Is it directed to you, or himself? Not even Reo’s quite sure. He does his best to ignore your kindness, if it were true then he would’ve been addressed you with a smile in the same way you’d speak to anyone else; he would know how his name sounds off your tongue. He would mean more than a last option, and all those texts wouldn’t be left on read, viewed out of genuine care rather than basic manners.

Even though he can go on about unfair this feels, it’s ultimately his fault for still spending so much time with you. You’re supposed to cut off the people who don’t value you. You’re supposed to only care for the ones who’d do the same for you. Reo should’ve cut ties with you long ago, yet he clings onto your relationship as if it meant more than anything else.

I miss seeing you at school everyday. Your words echo, and he does his best not to choke on his drink.

Formalities, not affection. It's not love, it's your way of manners. If you truly did care you'd be spewing those sorts of words out constantly, like when you're with Chigiri, or Anri.

"Reo? You good?"

"Yeah. 'm fine." It's a reflex, he barely had time to register the words leaving his mouth. "Are you?"

"Yah. I'm not the drunk one here am I?" You chuckle to yourself, bringing the glass back to your lips, averting your gaze elsewhere. "Were you always a lightweight? Your face is so red."

"And yours is so pretty."

There he goes, ruining your night with something stupid.

"Yup. Definitely drunk. You're saying weird things now."

And with that, Reo commands, requests, pleads himself not to cry.

"You know." Another shot of soju is swallowed down by you, punctuated with a refreshed gasp. "The me a couple of years ago would've been overjoyed to hear that."

It feels as though every interaction with you accentuates his one-sided love and it stings; time with you is mere salt to the wound.

Neither of you say anything for a bit.

Reo can recall your confession, an awkward text sent after a couple of months the two of you actually spoke. There's an unspoken boundary between you two, to not being up the topic of each other's crushes or of your confession.

A fair rule, but it's harboured questions. Reo hasn't got a clue on your love life and crushes. He knows of your obsession with romantic dramas, always binging whatever's trending, screaming on social media about having to wait a full seven days for the next episode.

If only the two of you were a part of one. But even fiction would probably destine him for solitude woven of heartbreak.

"I think you're the drunk one. Why bring that up now?"

You've finally halted on drinking. "Dunno. That was my first confession."

And you're my first love—he wants to say it, it's at the tip of his tongue yet he can't muster it to say it aloud to himself or even to Nagi; let alone you.

"Well, it was an honour."

It wasn't. Because the thought always intrudes into his mind. What if you had confessed a couple of years later, or even at least two?

Or what if Reo hadn't taken his sweet time to fall in love with you, if he had told you he wanted to get to know you first instead of a simple rejection, would you be in his arms?

"Shut up. I was a stupid kid back then. I promise you, I have absolutely no feelings for you. Not anymore."

Reo scoffs, he can't even fantasise of the potential between you two. You liked Mikage you'd see in the hallways; rich and top of the school; not clingy old Reo who feels ever so slightly too much for everyone he cares for.

Whereas Reo couldn't care less about l/n that just transferred to his class, but would die for the y/n he discovered throughout the years.

"Yeah yeah, I know. Never thought you did." He knew you didn't.

It wouldn't've saved him from his doom of unrequited love, but the timing was terrible. The heavens should've made your infatuation and his adoration align, at the very least. Even if it meant Reo remaining unloved.

A hiccup follows a breathless giggle. "Who did you like in highschool? There had to be someone. Why didn't you ever tell me though? You had so many fans, you must've liked one of them."

Because it's you. "Because you never asked." Reo shrugs, almost impressed at his own feigned composure.

"Now I ammm." Now your words are beginning to slur. "Whooo?"

It's you. And still you. Reo could say it right here and now. You're essentially wasted and probably won't remember it. And if you did, he wouldn't mind crossing an ethical line and fibbing if it meant concealing his pathetic vulnerabilities.

Perhaps one day he'll tell you, if the uninterrupted storm ends, and the skies clear, if Mikage Reo's heart will one day stop aching for you.

"I'll tell ya some day. When I feel like it."

"What?! You're not allowed to add that much suspense—and not tell me in the end."

And perhaps in another universe, he and you can be of the same constellation, instead of being galaxies apart.

taglist (send ask to be added) : @yuzurins , @pokkomi , @chigirizzz

© kitorin : do not repost, plagiarize, change, or translate

[rinzsu]

[rinzsu]

# THE STUDY GETAWAY - isagi yoichi

your doting boyfriend thinks it’s time for a coffee date.. at midnight.

You can't exactly recall when the chestnut wooden tiles of your bedroom floor turned into wet cement, yellowish streetlights reflecting on the pavement in a subtle, glossy glimmer.

Or when the reverberating ticks and tocks of the great grandfather-clock on the wall by your desk transitioned into the soft pitter-patter of early morning april-sereine, the intoxicating sandalwood scent and flickering brilliance of the candle by your bedside replaced by the petrichor smell of midnight deluge, the lingering redolence of caffeine and the milky gleam of tonights crescent.

There's a catch to it tough. For no matter how many scenery changes your environment must endure, it won't take away that unsettling feeling rooted deeply within your gut. It's discomposing, the absence of your ball pen weighing down upon your palm, soar Fingers twitching around the coffee cup clutched in your hand, like they're itching to grasp it's cool, shimmering metal texture instead of the paper grain of your partially emptied mug.

The need to repeat certain steps of variating formulas until flawless magnificence gnaws at your very core as you take shaky steps through the deserted streets of your hometown.

You feel the brush of Isagi's shoulder against your own, followed by a shallow breath before he gently grasps your palm, softly interlacing your fingers with his own.

"Look up. ", he mutters, and you do, catching the radiance of the moons luminosity in his azure orbs as he grins your way. "Not at me. At the sky", he chuckles.

You comply, absentmindedly glimpsing into the inky night sky as the stars twinkle like dousens of tiny pin drops spilled into the midnight sea.

"See the stars? Tonight's constellations might as well look a little different from yesterday’s, but they're the same stars nonetheless.”, he chuckles before he continues.

“What I mean is, failing that exam won't ruin your life. And to be honest, you flocking in that class is nearly impossible now.”

“My point is, that you've definitely did everything you could, but don't let your fear to fail get the best of you. Gosh you're so smart as is, so stop worrying about something so trivial like the midterm exams, which, by the way, are still two weeks away. You'll do great."

You smile at him, before turning your gaze down towards your feet, busying yourself by counting the crossovers of your shoelaces in order to dismiss your gradually increasing heartbeat.

“Thanks Yoichi. I guess I really needed this right now. "you chuckle, gesturing to him as you raise the cup to take another sip.

"But you got something wrong just now." you continue, snickering to yourself as you add, "it's not the constellations that change, but the earths position within the Milky Way, hence why our night sky changes with every passing day.”

His ears flush ever so slightly as you comment on his lacking diligence during Mr. Parks Astronomie class.

You smile at him, appreciating the subtle warmth provided by his cheesy words and frivolous comparisons.

It's silly, how easily his mere presence shuns all your worries away, his hand replacing the weight of your long forgotten ball pen as his carefree chuckles echoe through the streets.

© rinzsu 2024. plagiarism, translation and distribution of my works out- and inside of tumblr is not permitted.

feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

[rinzsu]

You watched the rain lash out its fury against the window. At an extent, it felt almost like looking at a mirror — from how an inner turmoil brewed inside of you reflected a rhythmic counterpoint to the storm outside. 

Nature sure does have impeccable timing, and the worst sense of humor — or could it be a cruel, mocking sympathy? You don’t know anymore, you have never been good at knowing intentions, after all.

But you had it coming, you admit.

You knew this day would come. Yet, the thing about anticipating the worst before it knocks on your door, is that it will never truly prepare you for what's waiting on the other side of that door. It never eases the dread, nor does it make fear felt less at the expense of gradual awareness. If anything, it made you restlessly on edge.

Thoughts of anguish and gloom halt at a key rattling in the lock. The door creaked open, and even with your back turned away, you knew there was only one living soul who had the rights to your home and, dare you say, your heart.

And there he was— Itoshi Rin stood there, like a ghost in his own town. He looked like a stranger in a familiar place. How could someone who lived in this place feel so foreign and appear so out of place?

You didn’t turn to greet him like you always do. The silence stretched, thick and suffocating, making you clench your jaw. You heard him call you, but his words drifted across the room— lost at the deafening simmer of your anger.

He called your name once more. This time, you turned your rigid back to the kitchen, ignoring his calls. You busied yourself at the abandoned dinner at the table, poking at the now-cold food with a detached air. Physically, the clinking of silverware was the only sound besides the belligerent drumming of rain. Internally, your shattering heart was louder than the two combined. 

The clinking grew frantic as Rin approached you, each chime a hammer blow to your heart.

He stopped beside the table you aimlessly fiddled. He was so close you had a whiff of his perfume– the warm scent of wood and spices serving you a bittersweet reminder of happier evenings.

“Y/N,” he snapped, his voice sharp. Marching forward, he reached for your wrist. His grip tight, halting your movement.

The clinking stopped. Slowly, you turned to look at him by the eye. Rin almost lost his facade of indifference at the sight. Your face was a mask of controlled anger, but the storm in your eyes mirrored the one outside.

“Let go of me,” you commanded, your voice low yet firm. 

Immediately, he paid heed to your request. The hand formerly holding your wrist found its place in his hair, aggressively combing it out of frustration.

“Look,” he starts, “I said I’m sorry. What more do you want from me?”

“For you to fucking care!”

A beat of silence follows your outburst. You felt your throat burning at the whirlwind of suppressed emotions that revealed itself. You were trembling— may it be from hurt or anger, you didn’t care. At that moment, you were immersed in his insolent audacity.

More?  How dare he say more? 

“You’re sorry? That’s it? We haven’t had a decent conversation in weeks, Rin. And this,” you gestured at the table with a bitter laugh, “I spent all afternoon making it. Because today was…” you choked on the word, your voice cracking and rogue tears finally falling.

“Our anniversary,” he whispered in response, finishing your sentence.

More tears welled in your eyes, blurring the image of the colorful icing of the cake you ceased to dispose of. 

He knew what day it was. He remembered. He damn remembered. 

And yet… Oh, dear god, how could your love be so cruelly disregarded?

He had no excuse, had no shame. The abandoned dinner, the cake, it was all for him. And he’d trampled all over it. 

“I don’t want another sorry, Rin. I don’t want anything more,” you hung your head low, “All I want is my Rin. Give him back to me, please.”

Breathing heavily, you closed the distance between you two. You reached for his cheek, carefully and slowly, letting your longing take its final time. Your gaze wandered across his face — from his forehead, down to his nose, to his lips, and back to his teal orbs — you tried to search for the man who once loved you as warm and golden as the sun.

But the spark you were searching for, the warmth that once ignited in his eyes, remained absent.

You knew it then. You really had it coming. But denial was just as comfortable as your well-worn sweater. It’s warm and familiar, even if it’s riddled with holes.

But that sweater— it was time to throw it out.

And it was already time to go.

Because when you pulled him tighter, he kept drifting away; and when you whispered confessions of love, all you heard was a hollow silence.

And that’s enough to know that the love you once had— the laughter and shared dreams, were now ashes in the grave of a cold frozen wasteland.

“I love you, Rin. I love you so so much,” you whispered between his lips, a tear trailing down your cheek, “It’s ruining my life.”

note. filed under the unfinished business files xD btw, it's ttpd listening party!

[rinzsu]

You watched the rain lash out its fury against the window. At an extent, it felt almost like looking at a mirror — from how an inner turmoil brewed inside of you reflected a rhythmic counterpoint to the storm outside. 

Nature sure does have impeccable timing, and the worst sense of humor — or could it be a cruel, mocking sympathy? You don’t know anymore, you have never been good at knowing intentions, after all.

But you had it coming, you admit.

You knew this day would come. Yet, the thing about anticipating the worst before it knocks on your door, is that it will never truly prepare you for what's waiting on the other side of that door. It never eases the dread, nor does it make fear felt less at the expense of gradual awareness. If anything, it made you restlessly on edge.

Thoughts of anguish and gloom halt at a key rattling in the lock. The door creaked open, and even with your back turned away, you knew there was only one living soul who had the rights to your home and, dare you say, your heart.

And there he was— Itoshi Rin stood there, like a ghost in his own town. He looked like a stranger in a familiar place. How could someone who lived in this place feel so foreign and appear so out of place?

You didn’t turn to greet him like you always do. The silence stretched, thick and suffocating, making you clench your jaw. You heard him call you, but his words drifted across the room— lost at the deafening simmer of your anger.

He called your name once more. This time, you turned your rigid back to the kitchen, ignoring his calls. You busied yourself at the abandoned dinner at the table, poking at the now-cold food with a detached air. Physically, the clinking of silverware was the only sound besides the belligerent drumming of rain. Internally, your shattering heart was louder than the two combined. 

The clinking grew frantic as Rin approached you, each chime a hammer blow to your heart.

He stopped beside the table you aimlessly fiddled. He was so close you had a whiff of his perfume– the warm scent of wood and spices serving you a bittersweet reminder of happier evenings.

“Y/N,” he snapped, his voice sharp. Marching forward, he reached for your wrist. His grip tight, halting your movement.

The clinking stopped. Slowly, you turned to look at him by the eye. Rin almost lost his facade of indifference at the sight. Your face was a mask of controlled anger, but the storm in your eyes mirrored the one outside.

“Let go of me,” you commanded, your voice low yet firm. 

Immediately, he paid heed to your request. The hand formerly holding your wrist found its place in his hair, aggressively combing it out of frustration.

“Look,” he starts, “I said I’m sorry. What more do you want from me?”

“For you to fucking care!”

A beat of silence follows your outburst. You felt your throat burning at the whirlwind of suppressed emotions that revealed itself. You were trembling— may it be from hurt or anger, you didn’t care. At that moment, you were immersed in his insolent audacity.

More?  How dare he say more? 

“You’re sorry? That’s it? We haven’t had a decent conversation in weeks, Rin. And this,” you gestured at the table with a bitter laugh, “I spent all afternoon making it. Because today was…” you choked on the word, your voice cracking and rogue tears finally falling.

“Our anniversary,” he whispered in response, finishing your sentence.

More tears welled in your eyes, blurring the image of the colorful icing of the cake you ceased to dispose of. 

He knew what day it was. He remembered. He damn remembered. 

And yet… Oh, dear god, how could your love be so cruelly disregarded?

He had no excuse, had no shame. The abandoned dinner, the cake, it was all for him. And he’d trampled all over it. 

“I don’t want another sorry, Rin. I don’t want anything more,” you hung your head low, “All I want is my Rin. Give him back to me, please.”

Breathing heavily, you closed the distance between you two. You reached for his cheek, carefully and slowly, letting your longing take its final time. Your gaze wandered across his face — from his forehead, down to his nose, to his lips, and back to his teal orbs — you tried to search for the man who once loved you as warm and golden as the sun.

But the spark you were searching for, the warmth that once ignited in his eyes, remained absent.

You knew it then. You really had it coming. But denial was just as comfortable as your well-worn sweater. It’s warm and familiar, even if it’s riddled with holes.

But that sweater— it was time to throw it out.

And it was already time to go.

Because when you pulled him tighter, he kept drifting away; and when you whispered confessions of love, all you heard was a hollow silence.

And that’s enough to know that the love you once had— the laughter and shared dreams, were now ashes in the grave of a cold frozen wasteland.

“I love you, Rin. I love you so so much,” you whispered between his lips, a tear trailing down your cheek, “It’s ruining my life.”

note. filed under the unfinished business files xD btw, it's ttpd listening party!

[rinzsu]

# THE STUDY GETAWAY - isagi yoichi

your doting boyfriend thinks it’s time for a coffee date.. at midnight.

You can't exactly recall when the chestnut wooden tiles of your bedroom floor turned into wet cement, yellowish streetlights reflecting on the pavement in a subtle, glossy glimmer.

Or when the reverberating ticks and tocks of the great grandfather-clock on the wall by your desk transitioned into the soft pitter-patter of early morning april-sereine, the intoxicating sandalwood scent and flickering brilliance of the candle by your bedside replaced by the petrichor smell of midnight deluge, the lingering redolence of caffeine and the milky gleam of tonights crescent.

There's a catch to it tough. For no matter how many scenery changes your environment must endure, it won't take away that unsettling feeling rooted deeply within your gut. It's discomposing, the absence of your ball pen weighing down upon your palm, soar Fingers twitching around the coffee cup clutched in your hand, like they're itching to grasp it's cool, shimmering metal texture instead of the paper grain of your partially emptied mug.

The need to repeat certain steps of variating formulas until flawless magnificence gnaws at your very core as you take shaky steps through the deserted streets of your hometown.

You feel the brush of Isagi's shoulder against your own, followed by a shallow breath before he gently grasps your palm, softly interlacing your fingers with his own.

"Look up. ", he mutters, and you do, catching the radiance of the moons luminosity in his azure orbs as he grins your way. "Not at me. At the sky", he chuckles.

You comply, absentmindedly glimpsing into the inky night sky as the stars twinkle like dousens of tiny pin drops spilled into the midnight sea.

"See the stars? Tonight's constellations might as well look a little different from yesterday’s, but they're the same stars nonetheless.”, he chuckles before he continues.

“What I mean is, failing that exam won't ruin your life. And to be honest, you flocking in that class is nearly impossible now.”

“My point is, that you've definitely did everything you could, but don't let your fear to fail get the best of you. Gosh you're so smart as is, so stop worrying about something so trivial like the midterm exams, which, by the way, are still two weeks away. You'll do great."

You smile at him, before turning your gaze down towards your feet, busying yourself by counting the crossovers of your shoelaces in order to dismiss your gradually increasing heartbeat.

“Thanks Yoichi. I guess I really needed this right now. "you chuckle, gesturing to him as you raise the cup to take another sip.

"But you got something wrong just now." you continue, snickering to yourself as you add, "it's not the constellations that change, but the earths position within the Milky Way, hence why our night sky changes with every passing day.”

His ears flush ever so slightly as you comment on his lacking diligence during Mr. Parks Astronomie class.

You smile at him, appreciating the subtle warmth provided by his cheesy words and frivolous comparisons.

It's silly, how easily his mere presence shuns all your worries away, his hand replacing the weight of your long forgotten ball pen as his carefree chuckles echoe through the streets.

© rinzsu 2024. plagiarism, translation and distribution of my works out- and inside of tumblr is not permitted.

feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

[rinzsu]

moots who are in a relationship/had one!! I need your help regarding my next fic! What are things that used to be icks for you in a guy that turned out to be attractive/cute?