ritztower-apt151

[ritztower-apt151]

Colin: We're being attacked by a shared fantasy?!

Colchester: Yes.

Colin: Why couldn't it be Gorka from Strictly...

[ritztower-apt151]

do you think Jack got cheeky for a while after the whole body swap thing?

bc i bet he did

subtly but he did tease Colchester sometimes

well, right up until he once asked smth along the lines of why they still use the shower if they have a hot tub

and you could hear a pin drop in the Hub for about .5 secs before Colchester had him on the floor with a gun to his forehead asking how he knew

and he had to babble a defense out real quick in fear of getting shot (several times in different parts likely) for sex he for once actually didn’t have

he stopped teasing after that

[ritztower-apt151]

..........................

i have a very very very cursed thought right now

i’ll give you 3 guesses

[they were a gift from Jack]

booty shorts that say “god won’t let me die” on the ass

[ritztower-apt151]

it will never cease to absolutely delight me how TINY Ramon Tikaram is compared to how big & burly Colin is canonically 😂😂👌🙌

ANYWAY I live for pictures like these obviously so !!!!!!!

[ritztower-apt151]

*looks at fictional character* nobody loves u more than me

[ritztower-apt151]

[ritztower-apt151]

Colchester @ Colin, anyone???

[ritztower-apt151]

wAIT FUCK THIS BLOG TURNED 1 LAST SUNDAY???

time fucking flies oh my god

[ritztower-apt151]

today: *lots of TW news* my dumb ass: ...wait...

Mr. Colchester once tried scamming Dorian Gray out of his body?????? i’m???? i need approximately one (1) lifetime to process this omfg  😂 😂 😂

[ritztower-apt151]

guess who totally doesn’t plan on reviewing on twitter much more often from now on

nooooooooo not me

[ritztower-apt151]

relistening to AKTAV like

Colchester: It's perfect. No one will guess what it means.

Me, yelling at my computer screen: YEAH BECAUSE YOU NEVER TELL ANYBODY YOUR BLOODY NAME

[ritztower-apt151]

can we just take one (1) minute to appreciate how well done the killswitch-setup was in Escape Room

i mean like, duh it was

but think about it: it literally wouldn’t have been 200% uglier any other way, or possibly wouldn’t’ve worked at all

for example, if Rhys had been with Colchester on one side

I *think* he would still have pulled the lever, but that would’ve totally painted him a monster and not a martyr (esp in Colin’s eyes...)

also Gwen/Ng would’ve been in Trouble trying to at the same time tell him not to (in order not to blow her cover) and... let it happen, *somehow*, bc ofc she wants to survive

or if, somehow (bear with me here), Colin would’ve been alone on his side (Rhys with Colchester or not)

would he not at least try to pull the lever for himself? ofc Colchester would not (/ would try not to) let him but :///

also who would ultimately kill the other side in that setup?? no one that’s who, Colin would *never* and Colchester... i’d like to say ‘never’ as well, but there’s that niggling 0.001% of doubt remaining that would have been made necessary *somehow* and he would’ve been traumatized forever and beyond, possibly (probably?) not surviving for much longer bc he simply... wouldn’t care to, anymore (bc i refuse to believe BF would just have him Go On Somehow like Jack [who literally only does so bc he has exactly 0 other options], i mean come the fuck on)

and i’m not even gonna mention how the *teams* wouldn’t’ve worked any other way bc that’s even more DUH than anything i’ve just said

thank you for your time and attention

[ritztower-apt151]

Colchester: The first time I met Colin's parents, I called Brahm's "Fünf Gesänge" opus 106 when it is, obviously, opus 104. They haven't spoken to me since.

Ng: Really? Just for that?

Colchester: Yes also because they're huge homophobes who think that I made Colin gay with my magic genitalia.

[ritztower-apt151]

Tyler: *teasing* Are you the big spoon or the little spoon?

Colchester: I‘m not a spoon, I‘m a knife.

Colin: He‘s the little spoon.

[ritztower-apt151]

Tyler: I know I'm a real asset.

Colchester: You're only off by two letters.

[ritztower-apt151]

Jack: You've beaten me at my own game.

Yvonne: Don't flatter yourself. You were never even a player.

[ritztower-apt151]

Colchester: I've prepared a safety briefing for you to entirely ignore.

Jack: Which I will.