rkiny

[rkiny]

     nayeon’s mind has been thrumming with energy from the very moment she and all the rest of her fellow trainees stepped into the venue, the days signature pink tracksuit donned on her frame in a way all too complimentary to the flush of excitement she can’t seem to get to go away. there’s so much going on, so much to do as the day progresses, but she’s happy to work hard through it all. it’s with determination that she works, all too focused on making sure the lunchboxes she’d signed on to help prepare look at nice as they can while still trying not to take too long during the process— maybe that’s why, when ian’s voice breaks through the veil of concentration she’d put up, nayeon feels herself startle slightly.

     her shock fades almost as quickly as it had come, wide eyes closing as she gives a wide and inviting smile. while nayeon has managed to form pleasant ties practically every other trainee signed under kt, ian is someone she’s quickly come to care for in a way a little more personal. maybe it’s because jaehyun has long since left, hard at work to forge a life as an idol, or because jungkook, while open to her care and almost motherly affections, is very independent, but nayeon felt herself endeared towards the younger from their very first conversation.

     there was also the added bonus of common interests, ones she’s not had the pleasure of sharing with anyone else in a very long time.

     the sight of lunchboxes stacked so carefully in his arms makes nayeon want to reach out and help, divide the load just in case he needs the extra hand, but then she remembers the smaller stack she’s got waiting for her to deliver as well. “ah, i can come with you! i just finished up this one, and i don’t want to keep the rest just waiting here for too long.”

     she opens her mouth to protest as he reaches to take even more boxes with him, even with how much stronger than her he must be, reaching over to take some for herself as well. “oh gosh, have they already? that was so fast— i’m curious to see what it is.” his enthusiasm is infectious, nayeon unable to hold back her growing grin as she waits for him to settle the boxes in his arms.

♥//ribbon

isac 2020 w/ @rkiny

there is no denying the electricity in the atmosphere, with the way the stands are buzzing with excited fans, all sorted distinctly by fanclub colors and flourescent signs, some lit up and blinking, others shiny and huge and spread out across multiple rows of seats. with every new trainee experience, ian catches another kpop bug, gaining yet another level of understanding and contagious interest. where his world of ballet is known for being poised and serious, serene and velveteen, this is a world that is cheerful and boisterous, colorful and loudly expressive. and somehow he’s found himself completely and happily caught up in it.

it’s probably a bit of a ridiculous sight, ian, six feet tall and in a pastel pink company t-shirt that might be a half-size too small, hunched over meticulously crafted portable meals to carefully place each sticker, note, photocard, ribbon, in its proper spot for each box. when his latest stack feels properly decorated, he takes the extra minute or two to carefully, albeit precariously, stack all ten of his boxes and gather them in the crook of his elbow, using gravity, and his chest, to keep them upright. 

“noona,” he utters warmly as he moves from his spot and approaches nayeon’s end of the table with a grin, “do you have any finished lunches? i’m gonna run this batch up to the second level.”

it was a pleasant surprise to discover nayeon had selected the lunchbox station as well; she was one of the (growing) handful of kt trainees he’d warmed up to rather quickly, having discovered early on that they shared a love of classical dance and a basic knowledge of the french language, which was plenty enough to establish an almost instant bond of camaraderie between them. 

he lifts a knee to prop up his stack as he frees one hand to reach for any other boxes on the table that look aptly decorated and ready to serve, “do you want to come with me? i want to go see the nsg fans with the matching scarves. i think they made up fanchants already!”

[rkiny]

♡ ₊˚ what to do?

( w. @yejirk​ ).

     on any normal occasion, nayeon wouldn’t find it hard for herself to make such a simple decision, especially when the options being presented didn’t seem overly difficult in comparison to one another. really, she was always a fan of choice— who wasn’t? now, however, she finds herself at a stalemate with her own wants. everything seemed like it would be a great deal of fun!

     relief comes in the form of yeji, a friendly face she hasn’t been able to see in over a month now, and nayeon finds herself bouncing her way towards the younger girl with a pleasant smile and a brightening demeanor. “long time no see, stranger!” her voice is light, giggles under toning her words, no hesitation holding her back from grasping yejis hand in her own to catch more of her attention. while it may be surprising despite having been able to meet up for a little around a month ago, nayeon hopes its a happy surprise. “have an idea of what you’ll do today?”

[rkiny]

rkyeri​:

♡ ₊˚ break the internet.

she can only imagine what they would have said to her if she had accidentally revealed nayeon as a kt trainee. when she was going over captions ( probably for hours, because that’s how these things usually seem to go for her ), she’s pretty sure she had considered saying something about kt too, so it’s a good thing she kept her mouth shut and just posted something simple about her being pretty ( which is still true! ). getting an sns ban isn’t part of her plan right now, especially if it’s for something like this and not even for something fun like a lovestagram.

which wouldn’t be fun either — not when she gets caught and scolded and is labeled a bad seed in the eyes of the management. but it’s more fun to think about.

“for the record, i think getting revealed on instagram like that would be great. whenever trainees get accidentally revealed by senior artists they always get a lot of buzz online. and especially for a company like kt. especially because you’re so pretty. you probably have pretty high school pictures, don’t you? no dark past or anything?” she laughs, looking at the pictures on her phone and sighing. “we’ll just have to wait to post these then, or maybe i’ll make a fake account, but i’m kind of scared?” netizens are too smart these days, and she swears they can find just about anything. “tell katie lee to hurry up! i can’t believe they’re keeping a gem like you hidden in the basement.

     “that’s true— anytime i’ve seen senior artists reference unknown trainees from their companies in pretty much any way, netizens seem to get to work really quickly,” she agrees, nodding her head as she thought. “honestly, i wouldn’t be surprised if people have already tried digging up some information about me even with nothing really to go off of— i’m your friend, after all.” it’s a joke, maybe only partially, but there’s a hint of amusement in nayeons voice nonetheless.

     it makes her think, however— when would nayeon finally be revealed to the public, if ever? it’s already been a year now since she began her training, and with the majority of male trainees gearing up for debuts of their own, she can’t deny the chance she’ll have to wait for a while longer. it’s not necessarily something that bothers her, but she can’t help the curiosity she feels.

     “honestly, i’m not sure if i’m happy or not to still be unknown. it for sure makes living still feel normal since i’m not someone for others to recognize.” she weighs the pros and cons. “the lack of major attention online is also nice— i really don’t know how you handle it, but i guess you’ve gotten used to it now, miss superstar.” she laughs, reaching out to give the younger girl a gentle pinch on the cheek.

[rkiny]

jkookrk​:

♡ ₊˚ to lean on.

he knows she means well but all it does is make him more angry. “don’t you think that’s fucked up though,” he counters, genuinely challenging her point of view. “how messed up is it that they play these mindgames on us, making us believe like we’re worth nothing. like we have no talent and we have nothing to our name or nothing that makes us special or valuable?” extinguishing his vape, he snarls his tongue. at this point no amount of vaping will sedate his urge to rebel and fuck shit up.

“there is always something you can do better, something you can learn- of course there is. but that doesn’t mean you’re completely talentless or that you haven’t already achieved something. no matter how much you work in this god damn company- you still get told you’re nothing. like all this time you spend improving, developing your skills, polishing your talents is worthless because you suck and you will always suck until they deem you don’t suck as much anymore that they can debut you,” he goes on, brows furrowing angrily.

“and even then they keep telling you you suck so you won’t ever stop neglecting your health and slaving away any hour worrying about how you have to work harder, train longer, do more just to meet some stupid expectations you’re never supposed to meet anyway.” the male snarls, kicking the railing in frustration. “that’s their mindset and I don’t care how cool katie lee makes herself out to be, the fact she supports this is sick and drop down wrong!”

     she understands his anger, the pain and frustrations laced in every word he spits out, negativity she can only imagine has been brewing for quiet some time now with how intensely it comes out. it’s scary, but not in a way that makes her want to cower away from him— no, his irritation is thick on her skin, firm in the open air, but she knows it’s not directed towards her. that’s why, despite the way it makes her stomach drop, she can withstand it ( she’d rather bare the wave she knows he needs to expel than risk letting him bottle it all up even more, letting him allow it to fester until all he knows is its bitter taste ).

     she can’t speak, refrains from doing so, wanting him to allow his thoughts to run freely without interruption— nayeon feels like a pause is the last thing he needs right now. through it all, she can’t help but think she agrees with him. it is unfair to be made to think you’re not worth what you really are, to be talked down to as a way of being kept in check, and maybe if she was stronger, she’d allow herself to speak up not just for herself, but for others. she wouldn’t be so lenient with any sparse negative treatment she gets, she’d be more outspoken, less conforming, but that’s the thing— nayeon isn’t as strong as she’d like to believe she was. she doesn’t think she’d ever have the strength to stand up in that way, not when she finds it easy to conform, but maybe that was simply her own weakness to bare.

     jungkooka was strong. jungkook had fire. if she can’t be strong, she’s happy that he can.

     “it is wrong, i’ll never disagree with you on that— i’ve pushed myself too hard plenty of times, withstood hours of work while sick and shivering, and it doesn’t feel good but...maybe, for me at least, it’s barrable because there aren’t always other options,” she admits, gaze cast down, fingers wringing together. “we can dislike it all we want...but we’re still here, right? feeding into it?” she’s silent, unsure of her own voice. “maybe that’s just how things are for now...”

[rkiny]

     birthdays have always been something precious to nayeon.

     she likes to think that fact is pretty obvious for people who knows her well enough to see— even if she can’t always go above and beyond for others, she does her best to at least she do something to let others know she cares, that people feel loved and celebrated on their birthdays, and in return, all she asks for is maybe a smile or two. that’s the sort of kindness her mother and grandparents gave to her growing up, so naturally, that’s the sort of kindness she loves to show others.

     yet, when it comes to her own birthday, receiving anything grander than a simple happy birthday or small gift always leaves her incredibly thankful and maybe a little more emotional than she feels she should be. being as open and emotional as she already is, nayeon knows she’ll always cry at least once on her birthday, and this year is no exception, especially considering this is her first birthday being spent with sia as her girlfriend.

     she’d been giddy since she’d made her way back home that night, eyes slightly red still from the small tears she’d shed throughout a day of well wishes, and she was happy to know she’d be getting to spend the rest of it with sia. she has no idea what they’ll do, what sia might have planned, but nayeon knows that even if it was simply lounging together, maybe with a movie, she’d love it regardless. the image she walks in to stops any cute little scenarios she’s got playing in her mind the moment she shuts their front door behind her.

     sia is beautiful— she always has been no matter what she’s doing or how she looks, but something about seeing the younger in something so thin, leaving very little to an imagination that already knows pretty much everything, nayeon still feels her heart begin to hammer. “b...birthday?” she’s almost embarrassed by how flustered she suddenly is, eyes wide and unable to look away. “for...me?”

⋆ party for two. ･ﾟ*

their birthdays seem to come one after the other.  considering that hers is in august and nayeon’s is in september, the fact is almost true.

after last month’s gift of waking up in the morning for something sweet and a date later that weekend that lasted hours, sia is determined to make her girlfriend’s day just as special as the effort that nayeon spent on her own.  she wonders if nayeon’s excited for it.  sia wonders if nayeon even thinks that she’ll be getting just as much, if not more in return  -  a showcase of her love showered in gifts, in kisses, and maybe just a little more.

she snuck out of training that day before senior monitoring  -  vowing to make up the hours on the weekend, but today is special.  she needed to do some setup, and sia’s absolutely sure that nayeon is distracted enough by all the texts she sent throughout the day or the oddly innocent fleeting touches to really guess at what she planned on.

by now though, nayeon should be coming home to see the setup that sia spent a few hours on.  and just at the right time, she hears the familiar tone of the keypad buzzing in the tone to let her girlfriend into their apartment  -  sia brushes down the wrinkles of her nightie and takes a look around the room, smiling as nayeon walks in.  “ hi, baby.” she says softly, not shy about the thin nightgown she’s wearing or the over the top state of their apartment right now with balloons all over the floor and flowers everywhere.  nayeon deserves the best, and tonight she’s going to have it.  “ happy birthday.”

*･ﾟ (   @rkiny   )  ･ﾟ*

[rkiny]

( 💌 ) IMRINNAS UPLOADED A NEW POST!

another year, another birthday! 24 years and i couldn’t be more happy with life 🎂 ( 📸: @/seesia ) / ( @rksihyeon )

[rkiny]

☉ 1 DAY AGO   ♥  ㅁ ⇛                                  :

1.2K likes JKookTM returning the favour ♥ took mum out on a nice lunch for her bday. happy birthday mum! : D @imrinna ( @rkiny ) • #ecetra #shenanigans #corinna #imnayeon

[rkiny]

rkgray​:

// producer drop

luckily enough, she didn’t seem to mind him coming up to her that late, even though they were basically just acquaintances within the same company. he mirrored her small smile, as he gestured towards the open door of the producing cabin he was using until now. whenever he started to work on a song, he forgot about the time, so he was rather hesitant to ask her for a little piece of advice, when all that she probably wanted right now, was to return home from an exhausting day of training. the older male felt a little guilty to hold her back, when she was clearly on her way out of the building, but he assured her that things wouldn’t take too long. it was really just that tiny detail that he needed to work out for the song to be completed. and he knew himself too well, that he wouldn’t be able to let it go til tomorrow morning until he was satisfied.

“that would actually help me a lot!” he beamed at her, before pulling out the chair for her to sit down and handing her the headphones for her to have a listen to said song. chuckling, he nodded at her question. “yeah… I’ve been trying to decide for the last thirty minutes. it’s just that i think that the beginning is really important to get people hooked on the song right from the start. like, i want them to listen to the song and knowing straight away, that the song is going to be lit. does that make sense to you?” gray wondered, mustering the younger trainee from the side, as he opened up the first draft in one window and dragging the second into the window right to it.

after making sure that the headphones aren’t set up to maximum sound, he pressed the start button and the music begins to cue. he let her listen to the first few seconds, until his producer drop is played, before pressing the pause button and switching over to the other draft. same procedure, just a other time stamp of said producer drop. it was just a tiny difference, but coming as a huge impact to him. frowning in cluelessness, he looked over to nayeon once again. “what do you think? is it strange, that i am hung up on that tiny detail?”

     even with them not being the closest, nayeon is glad she comes off as friendly enough for him to come to her for help, even if it was only because she was the only person around who could lend a hand. regardless, nayeon is happy ( even happier to help ), and as he leads the two of them back to the room he’d come out from, nayeon takes a second to send a quick text sia’s way to let her know what was going on, just in case she ended up staying even later at the company building than she’d initially planned.

     “the beginning of a song is definitely important,” she agrees, nodding along to visualize herself. she’s once heard somewhere that the first 5 seconds of listening to something were when people tended to make judgement, so making the opening few seconds of a songs appealing were very important. sitting beside him, securing the headphones he’d given her over her ears comfortably, nayeon allows herself to take in the computer screen in front of her, mind practically doing gymnastics as she looked at the program housing the older mans music. “i think i understand—”

     as the song begins to play, nayeon’s head immediately starts to bop along to the beat. she likes it, it’s easy for her to come to that conclusion, and to her, if this was the first iteration option, she could only imagine that the second option would be good too. once they both play out, she looks to gray, moving to take the headphones off. “...i think they’re both really good,” she starts, a laugh trailing after her words. “i don’t think it’s strange at all! i think about the same things when it comes to dancing— even small gestures can make a big difference, it’s the same for producing tracks.”

[rkiny]

rkyeri​:

♡ ₊˚ break the internet.

she looks at nayeon with a curious expression. “you know, i actually haven’t even thought of that.” when she posted the picture of them on her instagram, it hadn’t occurred to her that nayeon is still a private trainee, meant to be kept a secret from the general public until kt decided that it was time to reveal her. thankfully she didn’t reveal too much in her post — who’s to say that nayeon isn’t some random girl that yeri just happens to be close to? she doesn’t know a single normal girl who’s as pretty as nayeon is, but she supposes it’s not impossible.

“you’re right, i guess we can’t post these then.” she pouts at the missed opportunity of the selfies that they had taken and all the pictures she still has saved, but she supposes she can wait until nayeon becomes a public trainee. that would probably be a better idea anyways, because so many people commented on her post asking who her friend was, and it’s best not to feed into any rumors unless she wants her sns privileges taken away from her. “i’ll just save these in my camera roll then. maybe the world just isn’t ready for us.”

     despite still being a private trainee for the company, as far as nayeon was aware, yeri hadn’t been pulled aside and reprimanded for the photo, and it was still up on the younger girls account. in nayeons mind, especially since she also had yet to be scolded or punished for the photo being put up, she felt it was good to assume, technically, that they hadn’t really done anything wrong, so there wasn’t anything for the company to hold them accountable for. “i guess, since you didn’t really reveal anything other than that we’re friends, we haven’t broken any rules.”

     “that’s so sad, thought— we look really cute in them,” nayeon can’t help the little pout that grows on her lips, moving to lean over and look at the photos yeri was referencing. she knows it’s better not to, not until she’s at least been exposed by the company themselves as a trainee, but it’s still sad to know such good pictures will have to be kept in the dark for an unknown amount of time. “we already got a lot of attention the first time, i’m sure more pictures too fast would cause an uproar.” her tone is light now, joking as she continues. “lets just make one of those private finsta accounts and post them there while we wait.”

[rkiny]

jkookrk​:

♡ ₊˚ to lean on.

he knows she doesn’t mean to make his reasoning sound so little and whimsical but he has to chuckle bitterly at himself how stupid it makes him feel that really the only reason he signed was to be with the others. “not really, no,” he admits thus, looking at the ground below and admiring how tiny everything seemed from up here.

“I was a successful photographer. I had everything I could wish for. Money, fame, a stable career- the only reason I tried to go for this kind of career path was to venture into new territory and try to catch up the time I had lost so I could debut together with my friends,” jeongguk explains before inhaling another lungful of fruity smoke.

as he exhales he also exhales a long sigh and goes on. “I enjoy learning the arts of dancing, singing, rapping- performing in general but,” pursing his lips he shakes his head. “not like this. I don’t know how you all do it. the constant disapproval, basically feeling worthless and like no matter how hard you work, it’s all in vain because at best you just suck the least rather than actually ever receiving praise for something well done.”  

     his admission is one nayeon can’t help but feel both pity and admiration towards— jungkook is a good person, someone she sees as caring and hardworking and driven, and to know that his sole motivation was being driven by his friends...it shows his heart and nayeon is proud. but she knows how dangerous it can be do act solely based on those around you, rather than to act based on your own desires, and it does well to sadden her too. he’s kind, too kind for putting others before himself, and she knows that feeling well.

     “i hope it doesn’t sound like i’m stating the obvious because, believe me, that’s what i feel like i’m saying, but,” she begins, brows furrowing as she thinks. “i don’t think anyone should ever view themselves as being ready. especially in this setting, where everyone is constantly learning and trying to improve to receive praise, to think you’re ready can be so damaging once you don’t get the things you believe you’re owed.”

     “if i’m being honest...i don’t think very highly of myself, even when i think about what my strengths are.” the goals he’d set for himself upon becoming a trainee were ones that could’ve always blown up in his face, as they seemed to be doing now, and all she wants to do is help. “it’s harsh sometimes, but i feel like...if there’s something you can improve on, even if you’re already good at it, giving yourself small milestones to continue your growth is a good motivator. even if only for a little bit, while you sort out your next move.” whatever that may be.

[rkiny]

     it's not often nayeon allows herself to stay at the company so late. while she liked to think of herself as a hard worker, someone dedicated to her goals and who strives to do the very best she can, she was also well aware of how important it was to rest and relax whenever the chance was available, especially when she lived by a schedule that was as involved and taxing as trainee life was. tonight, however, she’d had some extra motivation— it was easy to convince sia to head back to their shared apartment before her as long as she promised not to stay too late, and so, some time later, nayeon was finally finishing up and slowly preparing to make her way home.

     she’d been roaming the halls, a freshly acquired water bottle in hand as she let herself wind down when he’d come up to her, his presence gaining her attention almost immediately. gray wasn’t someone she was too familiar with, even after being there for a year, but nayeon knew he was a nice person ( at least, that’s what she herself could garner about him from the very small and brief interactions they’d shared in passing ). so, when he voiced himself, she was sure to listen earnestly, a small smile on her lips.

     “ah, hello!” she faces him fully, her curiosity growing. “a song? well, i’m not much of a producer or song writer, but i can try to help as best as i can! have you been trying to decide for long?”

// producer drop

@rkiny

gray ruffled through his hair and leaned back in his seat. it was just a tiny detail that might seem meaningless for outsiders, but for someone as perfectionistic as him, it wasn’t at all. most of the time, he had no problem to come to a fast decision regarding that, but in some special cases, he would spend hours in polishing a small piece of his song. and in this case, there were just too many options to chose from. grumbling, he let his eyes wander from one window to the other, re-playing all pieces over and over again, before he came to the conclusion that he was in dire need of an objective opinion.

but, when he looked out of one of the recording rooms in the company building, and stared into the empty halls, he noticed how late it already was. most of his fellow trainees probably went back home already. with a sigh, he was about to get his stuff and return to his home studio to finish the song there, when he heard steps closeby. turning around he saw nayeon walking down the hallways. with a smile, he approached her quickly. she was a trainee he didn’t interacted with a lot yet, but she seemed like a nice and friendly girl. maybe she would agree to help him out.

“good evening, nayeon! uh, could i ask for your objective opinion quickly? it’s about a song i am working on right now… i can’t decide between the final drafts.”

[rkiny]

( 💌 ) IMRINNAS UPLOADED A NEW POST!

my son turned 3 years old today! i’m so proud of him, he’s growing up so fast 😢🎉 @/JKookTM ( @jkookrk )

[rkiny]

     ♡   ◞   𝐀𝐔𝐆𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟎 𝐄𝐕𝐀𝐋𝐔𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒.   ┋   location ⇢ pink pool cafe  !!

     the cafe is even cuter than she’d thought it might be.

     it’s easy for nayeon to distract herself, nerves playing in the pit of her stomach, heavy with breakfast and the ever growing pit she still can’t shake away. she lets her gaze wander the space, bright colors and cute props blinding  her from every direction, but she likes it━ it’s all distracting, the underside of her nose tickling from how the make-up artist getting her ready for her turn powders her face lightly. the sensation is also somewhat relaxing, her image reflecting back at her transparently from one of the cafes windows giving a slight preview of what she looks like, and nayeon is all soft pink blush, pretty glittering neutral shadows, and cherry lips. it all gets her into character, and as her hair is finished up as well, she’s finally able to take herself in fully, outfit and all.

     she always worries for no reason. she looks cute, pretty, just like sia said she always does. she feels silly now, wondering why she’d let her anxious thoughts override the confidence she’d felt whenever the younger complimented her. nayeon will blame it on her inexperience with modeling, this unknown and still unfamiliar territory more intimidating than she’d wanted it to be. at least the location is inviting, this whole experience less stressful with the props and less intense feel. she has to take a breathe and remind herself that this is just a cafe, not somewhere stiff and practical, but bright and fun. cute. pretty.

     and now, nayeon looks the part even more.

     she hears her name being called, and after thanking the staff who’d done her up as nicely as they had, she rushes past of staff members and trainees before she’s finally shown her stage for however long they’d have her. like she’d thought, there are drinks and small foods to use as props, menus seats to lounge. there’s more then enough for her to work with, to play around with and show her own take.

     it goes bay much faster than she’d thought it would, a blur of straws pressed against her lips, bright smiles and playful poses. it’s fun, now that she feels herself in the moment, the camera giving one final shutter of the lens before she’s given the boot for the next person. her shoulders aren’t stiff like they’d been that morning, her chest no longer tight, and the smiles she gives to the staff as she exists are genuine. “thank you for taking care of me!” yeah, that wasn’t so bad.

[rkiny]

♡ ₊˚ camera ready.

rksihyeon​:

she wouldn’t say she has a lot of experience in modeling, but sia would like to think that she isn’t exactly bad at it.  after all, working as a beauty guru for years in and of itself is similar to modeling, and .. well, she did make it as an extra in the superstar kt commercials.  it doesn’t exactly scream experience, not like some  -  especially not like eunbi, who had a chance to walk down the runway for seoul’s fashion week or johnny who has appeared in magazine spreads and  in so many other places.  but even still, sia thinks that maybe, for once, this may be an evaluation that she’ll be able to get through without being critiqued too harshly.

nayeon seems a little more nervous than she is, though.  her lips turn down in a frown, because truthfully she thinks her girlfriend is the most photogenic between the two of them and the prettier one, too.  she’d be perfect for modeling, but the fact that she’s nervous? it doesn’t sit right with her.  " well .. i’ve never really been there, but from what i’ve seen …“ she pauses, biting the inside of her cheek.  ” i think it suits you well.  just let yourself be natural and in the moment .. you’re naturally beautiful, but you don’t want to be stiff because you’re trying so hard.“  her fingers reach out to pinch nayeon’s shirt, tugging her gently to her.  ” it’s okay to have fun with it, too.“

     sia’s sweet words strike nayeon with fervor,  her goofy expression giving way to a sickly love struck smile and blushing cheeks. it’s an expression sia never fails to pull out of her, and while it’d been a little embarrassing at first, now, nayeon loves to let her emotions show as blatantly as she’s allowed ( and, thankfully, sia is never one to deny her the chance to express herself ). receiving praise from not only someone she loves so much, but from someone as breathtaking as sia, truly does help in raising her confidence level. for that sort of bust in moral, nayeon is always thankful.

     “i suppose you’re right, being too prepared can be just as bad as not trying to be prepared at all...” she trails off silently, her body yielding to the younger girls pull, falling into place naturally at sias side. it’s been a while since nayeon let herself feel this nervous over something, especially when evaluations weren’t anything new to her at this point, and while she’s always thought herself to be pretty, it’s always the unknown that seems to crawl its way under her skin. “i just wanna do well since this isn’t something they have us do very often, you know?” reaching a hand to grab one of sia’s one, it’s easy to let her mind wander as she gently tangles their fingers together. “i know you’ll do amazing, how couldn’t you when you’re you.” nayeon simply wants to match up.

[rkiny]

♡ ₊˚ sweet beginnings.

rklnaeun​:

she observes how charming the older female is ( naturally she was a trainee at kt ), she couldn’t help but wonder if she would one day have the same charm and confidence as nayeon has. when nayeon suggest they make thigns more comfortable and that naeun should call her unnie, she can’t help but smile a little– “a-alright…unnie,” a little hesitant but nevertheless she enjoys it and so far in kt, she feels fortunate to have met kind people. 

there was still the topic of her parents not knowing that she was a trainee but naeun hoped that they would be a little understanding, when they realized that she could balance everything and still do well in school ( she hopes ).

some might say that was a little too optimistic of her but she doesn’t care.

“no, i have never done this before– it’s all very new,” she nods her head slowly and smiles sheepishly at the older female for a moment, “hopefully i will get used to it sooner rather than later.” naun usually didn’t have trouble adjusting, this was just an odd feeling– to have auditioned and then to have been accepted based on her skills and not only her face.

“ a year–” the thoughts that float around in her head are more or less curiosities, wondering if she would be able to be a trainee for that long ( or if kt would not find her of enough value – ), “that is impressive though, maybe i’ll be here for a year as well,” she nods, now a little more excited then it hits her, maybe… just maybe she and nayeon would be able to debut in the same group if both of them manage to stick around for long enough.

     nayeon can’t help how happy it makes her to know the younger girl is already so comfortable with her presence— for as friendly and familiar she likes to become with new people, nayeon is aware not everyone views making new connections the same way that she does. maybe that’s why she feels an immediate kinship towards naeun, her openness being a wonderful pairing with nayeons love for getting close to others.

     “i’m sure you’ll get the hang of everything soon enough, it’s really great that so many of the trainees here are incredibly nice.” nayeon speaks fondly, reminiscing briefly back to when she’d first been brought into the company. everything had been brand new to her then as well, the idol life and all that it encompassed taking time to fully grasp and fall into, but with a year under her belt, nayeon felt she’s done well to earn her stay within the company so far. even if it never leads to anything, it’s an experience she’s glad to have. “you can always come to me, or really anyone you feel comfortable with, if you ever have questions or just want to talk. it can be a lot, but you’re not alone!”

     “sometimes it still feels like i just walked in the first time a few days ago, it’s hard to keep track of time when you become so busy with a new routine,” nayeon can only imagine the time to come and how long she’ll be able to call kt her home. “oh, who knows? i’m not sure how long it’ll be before we get the chance, what with the boys getting their attention right now, but...maybe we’ll be able to see the finish like together some day.” nayeon decides then that debuting with someone like naeun would make her happy.

[rkiny]

nayeon ♡ what is love [180412 m countdown]

[rkiny]

     ♡   ◞   𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐏 𝐌𝐂 𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍.   ┋   rktraineemc   !!

     it had been easy to let the first round of auditions slip past her, mind focused on other things, preventing her from really seeing the opportunities presented to her. in truth, the thought of being a host, becoming a mc for a show in any capacity, was daunting— what if she didn’t stand out enough? what if she wasn’t eye catching, or if the countless number of eyes potentially looking in her direction found her boring, someone easily forgettable, enough so to be turned off from the very thing she was trying to make memorable? while nayeon feels she’s made leaps and bounds in terms of developing her confidence, there are still days where she’s afraid to admit how small she can feel, the only person she’d ever let know of this being sia.

     nayeon found comfort in familiarity, in constants that rarely ever had the opportunity to change, so reality of hosting a show where the unknowns would be so great until it was time to record made her stomach do flips. on the other hand, she wasn’t blind to how it could also do her good.

     maybe breaking out of her comfort zone would help in strengthening her resolve. even if she didn’t make it, she would at least have the privilege of saying she tried, right? the worst that can happen is being turned down, and as she thinks back to the big choices she’s made in her life, that wasn’t really so bad, was it?

     no, not when one rejection wasn’t the end all be all. if that were the case, nayeon wouldn’t even be a trainee right now.

     so, as she finds herself sat next in a room of other trainees, some faces familiar, some she has half the mind to approach but decides against for the time being, nayeon does her best to keep calm and collected as she waits for her name to be called. when it finally is, along with the name of another trainee she’s not familiar with, she takes a finally deep breath, straightening out any wrinkles in her dress once she’s stood, and makes her way to the audition room, her partner following behind.

     they have a moment to exchange brief greetings— names, companies, wishes of good luck and assertions that they’ll do well despite the lack of familiarity, but that was okay. regardless of whether they were strangers or not, nayeon was sure that as long as they didn’t fumble the script too badly and kept themselves energetic, they’d do well together and individually.

     finally, stood before a camera with scripts in hand, they’re given their cues to begin as the camera begins to roll. it’s nayeon who begins, lips stretched into a wide, welcoming smile, cheeks flushed gently. “hi there, and welcome back!” her voice is clear, and though her shoulders feel a bit tense, heart racing, she can already slowly feel herself loosening up as she continues. “this is im nayeon and—” she cuts herself as she looks to her partner as they pick up from where she leaves off.

     recording continues on in a similar fashion, the script being traded off between the two of them as they go on, and by the end, nayeon hardly feels any of the anxiousness she’d been feeling when she first walked in, and for that, she’s glad. as they wrap up and are told to leave, she does so with a thank you and bow, smile no less warming than it had been at the start. she gives her partner a squeeze on the arm, making sure to let them know she thought they did well, and while she can’t say if either will be picked, the least she can say for herself is she had fun.