This account is old and so are my memes, minors DNI. (asks/requests: open!)
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nobody has been there for me like the ‘x reader’ tag has been there for me
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Me feeling like Bella every night chossing which man I want to read hard smut about.

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I can sense risk assessment questions a mile away
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tumblr is for putting your stuff somewhere that's not secret but also not for anyone particular to see so it's true neutral in a really nice way
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From the media that brought you "Millennials are killing [insert industry here]" articles for years and years and years, now we have....
"Hey, Gen Z, we're gonna relabel vacations into something else now and tell you how you really should be wary of taking vacation because it might impact your financial future."
This is a goddamn dystopia, we know this, right?
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something funny about watching streamers get into uma musume as if it were gambling on actual race horses
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🔊🔊 END STAGE DISCOURSE!! END STAGE DISCOURSE!! WE HAVE ARRIVED AT "FICTIONAL SEX IS COERCIVE BECAUSE CHARACTERS ARE BEING FORCED TO DO THINGS BY THE AUTHOR"!!!! 🔊🔊
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Saw this on twitter honestly loosing my mind over it.

https://x.com/mekklord/status/1778678608543752285
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NSFW HC'S— Dorian, Doug & Dunk x GN!Reader (MDNI)
A/N: Sometimes horniness from a tiktok edit over a dateable door makes you write so much smut that your fingers are aching. Sorry for any mistakes as English isn't my first language:-]
EDIT: a huge chunk of Dunk's part was missing that i didn't paste from the goodle doc i wrote this in... this is so embarrassing🥀
I've also decided to take requests, im working on finishing the game and im quite there! i dont mind writing just about anything so, go ahead! Mailbox is open!
WC: 2.3K
⋆.𐙚˚ ⋆.𐙚˚⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹⋆.𐙚˚ ⋆.𐙚˚ ⋆.𐙚˚⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹⋆.𐙚˚
Dorian
He’s most likely going to be the initiator, especially after you’re both in a relationship. He is still hesitant with his boundaries not really being respected in his previous relationships, but when he’s all in on you when the relationship starts, he will willingly give himself to you, fully trusting of you. No questions asked, he knows you’ll respect his decisions, and that means more than the world to him. Which, in turn, makes him more inclined to initiate sexual or romantic encounters.
Every time you brush up against Dorian when walking around the house, throwing him a wink when you do so… to say he’s turned on would be an understatement. He’s relatively easy to rile up when he feels secure in your relationship.
Once he realizes how much you squirm when he talks real close to your ear, it’s over. He won’t stop doing it, he’ll be hips flush against each other kinda deep inside of you, not moving, just teasing you by talking breathlessly into your ear, “You like that feeling, love? Want more?” when you whine out his name, too sensitive to speak properly, he just chuckles and that makes you shiver; much to his delight. Though, every time you do shiver, moan or whine you can feel his cock throb inside you, his breathing gets jagged, and his self-control gets that much closer to cracking.
Durable. Actually loves cock-warming but gets impatient when you won’t stop squirming on his lap so, he holds you by the waist and fucks into you with almost all the strength he can muster, you’re a delicate thing compared to him after all; whatever your size may be. He can hold off on an orgasm just fine, just so you can cum before him, it feeds his ego like you wouldn’t believe. Making you cum before him is a must, you’ll cum at least 2 times before he even thinks of letting that tight knot snap and fill you up in every way possible. He’s a patient man, he’ll wait for hours if it means you’ll be a crying mess under him.
This man loves getting his dick sucked. Whichever Dorian. Though front door Dorian seems to be exceptionally sensitive compared to others. You’ve never seen him so flushed as he is when his dick is in your mouth. You looking up at him with those pretty eyes has his dick harder than he ever thought possible. It’s sort of this rush of power too, like you’re his owner, practically his boss, and here you are, his dick in your mouth and moaning for him to cum down your throat- it makes him cum embarrassingly fast.
Whenever you’re naked in the shower or your room, he has to do everything to hide his very obvious boner from the other objects around. Especially if you, unknowingly so, accidentally brush up on him just as you’re out of the shower? God, he’d never think about neglecting his duty, but you’re wearing his patience thin.
A lover at heart. Loves foreplay, but he’s just been so deprived of you all this time that he’s yearning heart and body just can’t help but pounce on you with every opportunity you present him with. Be open with him, even if your shyness kills you, tell him to fuck you ‘till you’re crying, tell him to fill you up so fucking full that it gushes out of you with every thrust— directness turns him on so much.
Loves seeing you all tied up and pathetically helpless— completely at his mercy. He’s been the one protecting you all this time without faltering for a second, so you willing to be the most vulnerable you can be consciously with him, he can’t help but feast on every breath, every shiver and every moan you let out.
The biggest freak is trap door Dorian though, without a doubt. He’s never seen you half naked, let alone fully naked. When you show yourself to him for the first time, all the blood rushed to his dick, and he has to keep his composure. Though, his flushed face and breathless tone of voice really don’t help to hide it. Worships your body like it’s an art piece, loves playing with your nipples the most, though. Just the way you squirm and your hold on his hair tightens makes him groan with that husky voice of his.
I think the en suite Dorian (bedroom bathroom Dorian), loves a handjob more than anything else. Loves watching the way your fingers play with and tease his dick to hardness, the same fingers that touch him every day without thought working to make him cum? Ultimate fantasy of his, actually.
The one that wants to fuck you ‘till you forget your own name is bedroom door Dorian. He has seen you in your most vulnerable states, every whimper that you let out when you’re masturbating just gets his whole body so hot he has to stop himself from replacing your fingers with his own or his mouth. When given the green light, he won’t let you go until you’re a crying, full-with-cum mess. His thrusts are deep, cock head brushing against your sweet spot non-stop, making your vision dance with stars as he grunts and nibbles on your ear. His hands will massage your ass and thighs as he’s fucking into you, too, a grounding touch helping you to not zone out and feel everything that he’s doing to you.
Aftercare? He will do his best, and he is amazing at it! He will hold you in his arms, his scent developing your senses as he peppers kisses along your back and nape, his hands massaging your hips and ass non-stop as he asks you if you want water or if you want him to clean you up right away. Very considerate of your needs, 10/10.
Doug
Do not be fooled by the way he talks and how he speaks, this man is all in on for being dominated. Though he prefers to say, “making him your bitch”, it’s the same thing anyway.
Horny for you 24/7, literally always ready if you are. When he sees that look in your eyes and how your tone changes when you speak to him, he already popped a boner.
Insatiable freak, loves going at it for round after round, for hours and hours. Tie him up and milk his cock with your mouth, hand or hole, make him a mess, and he’ll thank you for it, call him a good boy, and he’ll cum on the spot.
Tie him up and shove his cock down your throat, slap his thigh when he can’t help but thrust his hips up into the tight heat of your mouth- the way your tongue drags over that one vein on his dick makes him moan out your name and his thighs stiff up with self-control as he tries to just not fuck your face ‘till he paints your mouth white.
Loves picking you up and cornering you by pressing your back to the wall you keep looking at when you want to meet him, he just wants to fuck your brains out in the place you first met! Isn’t that romantic?
When you two first have sex, he’ll try to have this nonchalant attitude, but it crumbles easily when you moan his name so lovingly as he’s fingering you open to take his cock. Despite how he comes across at first he really is careful with you, he knows he is way stronger than you, so he tries to relax the hold he has on your hips as you’re riding him with that lovesick look on your face that has his cock throb and leak pre inside you.
His biggest fantasy is you being on your phone as he’s fucking you, maybe playing your favorite game, trying to win a match or trying to progress as every thrust just shakes or makes you shiver. He’d tell you to go on, you can’t cum if you don’t achieve your objective, he’ll fill you however times he wants, you can cry and beg however long you want, you aren’t cumming ‘till you complete that objective.
Loves taking you by the chin after he just came in your mouth, tells you to open up and feels his cock get full on hard again just at the sight of you with your tongue—covered in his cum— out, tugs you closer and bends down to kiss you, sucking on your tongue and tasting himself as he groans into your mouth. Your little shivers just spur him on more.
Ride him and tell him he isn’t allowed to cum ‘till you tell him to. When he inevitably fails to do so, he just can’t help it, the way you squeeze down on his dick like you’re trying to milk him out of every last drop is hard to resist for a being like him, overstimulate him and don’t get off of his dick ‘till he’s crying and begging you to stop and keep going at the same time.
He does jerk off, a lot. Especially to the photos of you, hell even when you’re just moving around the house, and he catches a glimpse of your armpits, inner thighs or your nipples? He’s stroking his dick and will take a video for you to show t to you later, he is shameless about anything to do with sex.
Aftercare? Well he doesn’t like to clean himself up right away, especially if it’s after a particularly long session, he’ll take a photo of his dick now covered in cum, he’ll take a photo of your sex and your whole body to jerk off to later and admire, then you’ll get to aftercare. He tries when he’s with you, but you’re going to be the one that ultimately takes acre of him, if you’re genuinely so tired out he will do his best, although stiff, he is trying his best.
Dunk
For the love of all things holy, be straightforward as you can with this man. He is great at sex, but he is bad at picking up innuendos and hints.
Will worship your body no matter how you look like or how you weigh, he is in love with you, in awe of you, he’ll kiss along your back, down your chest and your inner thighs all the while murmuring about how perfect you feel against him, how his skin on yours makes everything feel electric.
He feels the same rush he has when he’s trying out a new sport as he’s having sex with you, that makes you an addiction he’ll never want to put down.
The way you slam your hips against his when he’s being a little too gentle, and you just want him to fuck your brains out. Oh, he can do that, very well. His favorite position to turn you into a blabbering mess is full nelson, the way he can just fuck into you and feel your every moan and groan on his chest as his dick hits that sweet spot over and over again while you’re crying out his name is nothing short of an addicting adrenaline rush.
He also loves the mating press, just any position where he can use his weight and stamina to fuck into you, feel everything your body has to offer as you sing his praises with loud moans and cries of his name, fuck he can’t get enough. Maybe ask him about why he loves it when you use that fitness ball. It can’t be possibly because he can just feel every second of your crotch, ass, and thighs rubbing against him, sometimes even with your full weight? Of course not(!)
Loves giving oral pleasure the most, actually; take a fist full of his hair—what you presume that is, anyway—and thrust into his mouth/grind your sex down on his mouth. He loves being used for your pleasure, the fact that he is so durable that hours of sex won’t wear him down makes him the perfect toy to fuck yourself with.
He cums a lot, and I mean, a lot. He has to thrust at least six more times as he’s cumming inside you just to ride it out, even as it’s gushing out of you and making a mess. Will be licking your sex clean off of any cum, yes he will ask to make out, yes he wants you to suck on his tongue and taste both of you.
Loves a strip tease, too. Whether he does it or you, loves to watch you more actually, especially if you’re visibly aroused, his mouth always starts watering when your underwears finally off.
Dry humper. Loves to grind down on you, feel you squirm and beg for him to just touch you, loves to feel how your thighs tense as you cum just from humping him;
If you’re AMAB, he will purposefully grind down his hard-on on yours, just to feel it twitch and throb against his own. Will tease you if he sees the evidence of pre-cum already leaking, as if his dick isn’t wet already from his.
If you’re AFAB, he loves to just grind down ‘til he can feel the wetness through the fabric, rubbing against you just so that his boner presses down anywhere close to your clit to watch you shiver.
1000/10 aftercare, you will never catch this man lacking in that department. Big, secure, warm cuddles as he wraps all of his limbs around you, if you complain about the fluids he’ll tell you to give him 5 minutes, he just wants to bask in the afterglow. Definitely snuck some water into the room to give you some after or during sex, peppers kisses all over your face and affirms his love for you with words and gentle touches.
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it's almost summer do you guys want my stupid hyperoptimized lemonade recipe that takes half a day to make and whips absolute ass
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i hope luigi mangione is proven innocent & gets to sue a ton of companies for slander and win & i hope he gets enough money to rebuild his life and get any help for his chronic pain that he needs & i hope he’s able to disappear from the public eye entirely if that’s what he wants
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