rocksaltpaperscissors
rocksaltpaperscissors
...possibly
9K posts
a pile of things that made me laugh and/or yell
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 9 hours ago
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Sometimes there's a fanfiction plotline of someone trying to forcibly separate Murderbot and Art but ngl I think if that were to happen in canon those two would conspire to hide Mb in the walls like an angry raccoon
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 11 hours ago
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 11 hours ago
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my Game Theory™ for space balls 2 is that mel brooks started it now like 40 years after the original and at 99 years old because he is fully aware of and counting on his own mortality halfway through production because it'll be funny. decades-later cash grab sequels where the original cast is visibly too old to be doing this like they used to in their prime has basically come to define the thing that space balls is parodying, and star wars too encountered problems involving a key actor dying in the middle of production because of it. mel brooks will play a pivotal role in space balls 2 as director, producer, and lead actor, and he will die during filming, and either he has specific contingency plans for that or he trusts the people he's working with to handle it but either way he knows it's the funniest possible way to go and now is the perfect time to make Space Balls 2: The Search for More Money
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 2 days ago
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whenever my siblings and i are fortunate enough to visit a museum, we pick our favorite statues and do our best to replicate the poses because life's too short to not be silly
anyway, I think Piranesi would have great fun having a go at these as well :D
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 2 days ago
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“For a moment I had an idea of what it would be like if instead of two people in the World there were thousands.”
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 4 days ago
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murderbot is the funniest thing in the world because it's constantly like "stupid fucking humans" and "oh theyre all gonna get killed and i dont even care, whatever". my sibling in The Company you killed yourself for these people
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 9 days ago
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I love a sentient spaceship with Absolutely Zero Chill
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 10 days ago
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Arthur in a situation
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 12 days ago
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 12 days ago
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Thinking about when I worked at a shitty restaurant + one night it was just me + 3 other women on closing shift, so some guy came in the back and waved a knife around, presumably for money but I’m not actually certain, bc he was met with the bartender holding a much bigger knife, a tiny teenager wielding a cast iron pan, an elderly woman holding up a crockpot of clearly boiling water, and me, turning on the meat slicer with eye contact for maximum effect. He left, but the moral of the story is not girl power or whatever, it’s just. Why the fuck would you threaten a room full of underpaid and sleep-deprived blue-collar workers surrounded by lethal weapons.
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 13 days ago
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Arthur with curls
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 13 days ago
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obligatory post today
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 14 days ago
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 15 days ago
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hello there~
may the 4th be with you doodle dump be apon ye
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 15 days ago
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really good thing about eartha kitt I wanna be evil is how easy it is to invent new verses. I wanna be evil. I wanna throw cats. I wanna be evil. I wanna wear hats
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 17 days ago
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Murderbot in Network Effect is so funny. It’s like “my friend is dead this is the WORST and LIFE IS PAIN” and then rescues ART and immediately pivots to “I can’t BELIEVE you kidnapped me and dragged me out here just to save your useless fucking life, I hate you.”
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rocksaltpaperscissors · 18 days ago
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TV!Bot: All humans are assholes. Disgusting, naive organic creatures that are only good at getting themselves killed. I hate being anywhere near them and couldn’t care less about their wants or needs. I should just let them all die. Or kill them myself because I’m an evil Murderbot. Yeah… yeah I think I will kill them. I will! …eventually. 
Book!Bot: My humans are the fucking best. No human clients are as awesome as my human clients. Did you know they drive the hopper safely? Don’t get into petty squabbles? Use the feeds so we can chat without them looking at me? Yeah, exactly. Phenomenal. If anything happened to my humans I’d kill everything on this planet and then myself. I want to kill things just for THINKING about hurting my humans… unless it’s Gurathin. It’s fine if he dies.
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