romance-with-a-liminal-space

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

I give you every reason not to love me

With the things I put you through

A rainstorm soaking you to the bone

I see you shiver

But the cold doesn’t seem to bother you

Sometimes it’s feels like you’re far away

I count the seconds between the brilliant light and the rolling growl that follows

I wonder, when the distance grows between them

If the lightning ever worries you

But you just smile, two feet planted on

the ground

And tell me that it just flows through you.

Sometimes I feel like the rain, falling, cold

But you hold me. You boil tea for two,

And your eyes, warm, tell me you love me.

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

You taste like peach and warm coffee

I sit beside you and listen to you play

The words I wrote for you.

I’ve waited a lifetime for someone to see me the way you do.

As if I’m something small and warm

You hold me to your heart and listen to me speak.

As the sun curls up behind the mountains, the last crack of light disappearing as I read to you

You want to listen.

You want to scream with me

the things we’re afraid of

Let them echo off the hills.

I lie awake, thinking of eucalyptus and cinnamon.

And that smile that feels like sunlight.

I’ve waited too long to feel like this, but now I do, it’s like I always have.

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

I hope you want me like I want you.

That those things you said mean what I hope them to.

I hope you’re thinking of me now dear.

With a fondness in your heart; bring

home a eucalyptus leaf for me.

And think kindly of me.

As I think kindly of you.

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

now every song I listen to is about her

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

I’m grinning and hoping you feel it too.

But the smile that spread across your face like sunlight when you saw me says all it needs to,

I don’t know if you lie awake like I do,

But the gentle fall of your hair, and the red across your face,

How could you ever sleep?

Under the layers of prickling nettle, lies a glittering heart,

You yearn to be warm, held between two hands.

I see the kindness in you, I see the mist,

Falling across your eyes. A gentle spin, inviting and cool.

I’ve watched that cold melt away. A soul full of light breaking through.

I hope you feel the way I do. But you seem as stupid as me about all this.

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

I want to laugh and love and spin and dance.

I want to watch the smile spread across your face, a moment of brightness.

I want to lie and listen to the rain fall among the gum trees, and smell the soft dirt and leaves.

I want to love again.

Let the lilting mists and hazy breeze return to my buzzing heart.

I want to curse my love as I lie awake,

Curse you as I write my soul into little

inadequate sentences

Let me fail to express my heart to you, the words

muddied on the page.

Weave my heart into my sleeves. Let it hurt again.

I’m tired of being protected. I’m weary of the small breaks.

I want to love you.

But I don’t know if I can.

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

Franz Kafka, Letters To Milena

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

coco mellors, cleopatra and frankenstein.

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

i think i must be hard to love

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

Violence,

a self defined by the distortion of who I think I am.

Who do you think I am?

An uncanny copy? A gentle fuzz?

We are all made from the same stuff in the end.

Just another construct of

Me, myself and I.

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

there is a love in which i will always know you, just incase you forget.

love elizabeth s.

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

Wavering, glossy, pale, shaking

You see your reflection in the water, a blue-grey copy of your face,

Warped by the droplets.

It seems to whisper to you the nature of your self.

In the mirror you look

like broken promises.

You wonder how the sun can pull it all away. Wander slowly through the leaves;

A summer breeze, murmuring, beckoning.

The warmth on your skin, it makes you yearn for water, the simple lull of the tides,

You feel at peace.

But the sun lapses, and the shade catches up.

The rain always returns

to remind you

That you said you’d stay.

But you didn’t.

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

I feel so small. Hundreds of eyes on me.

And how you all talk. At least I’m on your mind.

I want to hide. I want to run. But that’s exactly why I need to stay here. Now.

I feel hated and terribly loved. I feel like a piece of falling glass, suspended.

Trapped in a moment of beauty and horrible spectacle. As I fall, you fear.

But sometimes we have to let it fall. We can’t always make it in time.

You all watch, though. As the light refracts, colours dancing in your eyes as they grow ever closer to doom.

Write more. Think about it.

Make about it.

Any press is good press, and you have press.

Do you want to be kind? Or loved? Which one wins? And will you let them hold you?

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

Something wriggles up the inside of your sleeve. Prickling.

Does it have hundreds of legs; or none at all.

You catch a glimpse of yourself. You whole body writhes.

You don’t remember there being so many. Yesterday there were only three. Four. Five.

Or was it ten?

You thought it was concerning there was blood running from your eye.

But you didn’t go to the doctor. You wanted these little friends. They like you more than anyone else does.

[romance-with-a-liminal-space]

Tell me what you think about

in your

Nightmares,

and I’ll tell you what I think about in

my bedroom

when I’m alone.

I would call my thoughts a cool beige.

An unassuming. Upsetting.

cool beige.

Never all that interesting.

Never all that bad.

Never something significant.

So they rattle around. And roll in the sun.

I name the pretty ones and write them down like achievements.

Good for them.

And probably,

Good for me.