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rothpie · 3 months ago

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❝FIDELITY❞ |part17

MASTERLIST -`✮´- Rafe Cameron x Kook!Reader x JJ Maybank

Summary: Kook!Reader’s world is upended by betrayal, and her only way forward might lie with the most unlikely person—JJ Maybank. But as they build a new life together, old flames and past mistakes refuse to stay buried.

Warnings: nothing

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When Rafe parked his car in front of your house, his hands froze on the steering wheel. Thoughts were spiraling in his head, but he couldn’t seem to grab hold of any of them. He was tense. Anger, uncertainty, curiosity—and just a flicker of hope. All of it was screaming at him, like a chorus of emotions refusing to shut the hell up.

He’d been thinking about this day for weeks. He had gone over every possible move, replayed this moment in his mind a million times. He wanted to look better than his best. Even if he didn’t say the words out loud, he wanted to be someone worthy of Liliana.

Someone who deserved to be her father.

And when the door opened, it was you standing there. Just a plain grey T-shirt on, messy hair, eyes tired and unreadable. You leaned against the doorframe, looking straight at him sitting in the car.

For a second, Rafe felt like he was thrown into the past. He still wasn’t used to being near you. Hell, he had forgotten how to breathe when you texted him. And now—now you were right there, just a few steps away on the damn porch.

For a heartbeat, just one, Rafe imagined you running to him as soon as he got out of the car. Just like old times.

You’d plant a kiss on his cheek, jump into his arms, laugh and say how excited you were to see him again, making him laugh too.

But those days were gone. You weren’t going to run into his arms, and he wasn’t going to kiss you like before. This wasn’t five years ago. You were who you are now. And he—he was whatever was left of himself after you. Half of what he used to be.

Still, Rafe stepped out of the car, his daydream fading. Just walking toward you felt like the universe was cutting him some slack for once. He took a deep breath, trying—and failing—to shake the tension in his chest.

“Hey. You’re here,” you said, not taking your eyes off him.

“Yeah,” Rafe nodded slightly. “Sorry I’m a bit late.”

He didn’t mean to be. He had nearly lost it back at home, overwhelmed by nerves. He hadn't even realized how much time had passed.

“It’s fine,” you said automatically, brushing off your hand and giving a little shrug.

Rafe ran a hand through his hair, like he was trying to talk himself into believing this was real. “I had to stop by the gas station and—”

“Rafe.” Your voice was soft but firm. You were looking him right in the eyes. “It’s okay.”

Rafe used to be able to read you with just a glance. But now? Now he couldn’t read shit. And that scared him. A little panic crept in—what if you were already over this? What if you suddenly decided to call the whole thing off?

Not gonna lie—he’d drop to his knees and beg if that’s what it took. He would. He wouldn’t even hesitate. He wasn’t curious about the life he’d missed, because he already knew it would hurt. Hearing it, knowing he hadn’t been there—it would wreck him.

But this was about Liliana.

They didn’t even know each other yet, but Rafe already felt like she was part of him. And that was enough.

He couldn’t fix the past. God, how he wished he could. But time didn’t work like that. He couldn’t rewind. So he wanted the rest of it—the time still left.

He wanted that one shot to make up for everything he missed.

He didn’t know if things would ever be right between you two. As co-parents, or... anything else. But with Liliana? He knew he could get it right.

More than that—he wanted to.

“I’m glad you came,” you said finally. “I told Liliana a bit, but… I don’t know how she’ll react.” A small smile played on your lips.

And with those words, Rafe felt like he could breathe again. Knowing you hadn’t given up, knowing there was still space for him—it gave him something solid to hold on to.

Maybe, if the roles were reversed, he wouldn’t have been able to do the same. But you were doing it. And he knew—it wasn’t for him.

It was for Liliana.

“I get it,” Rafe said. Just two words, but they scraped out of his throat like they weighed a ton. His voice carried all the uncertainty in him. All he had left was hope.

“You look nervous,” you said, stepping back slightly until your back touched the door. You cleared your throat, eyes studying him. Rafe shifted when he felt your gaze sweep over him with something almost like concern.

“I am nervous. As fuck,” Rafe said, shaking his head slowly. His eyes dropped to the ground for a moment. He didn’t want to lie or play it cool. He didn’t want to lie to you. He was nervous. Scared. He didn’t even know what the hell he was doing. He couldn’t even control his damn breathing. But there was this tiny part of him that was... excited too.

While the anxiety was practically buzzing through his whole body, he heard your laugh. You licked your lips and looked slightly over your shoulder, as if checking for something even though there was nothing there.

“It’s gonna be okay,” you said in a calm, reassuring tone. Of course you didn’t want both sides to be on edge for this first meeting. That would be a disaster.

“I hope so,” Rafe replied, his voice lower now. Even though you were trying to comfort him, it wasn’t going to fix everything. Not today.

“Yeah. Trust me,” you added. Your voice was soft, but there was something underneath it. Something you were trying to hold back.

Rafe hesitated to meet your eyes. Really, he did. Because—because it felt like you were looking at him with pity. And he couldn’t handle that.

He couldn’t look at you and see the disappointment he’d caused staring back at him.

The way he had always felt about you—how deeply, how fucking clearly—was right there, in plain sight. And now?

Now it was hard to look at you without seeing what he’d broken.

He didn’t want to do this.

Didn’t want to look at you.

“Where is she now?” Rafe asked abruptly, trying to shake off his nerves. He wanted things to move quickly. He just wanted to get rid of the anxiety and meet his daughter.

“She’s inside.” You tilted your head, pointing behind the door.

Rafe hesitated. He almost didn’t ask, but his mouth betrayed him. “With him?”

You nodded. With a deep sigh, you looked away from him, turning your gaze toward the garden. “Yeah…”

Of course.

How the hell had this even started?

He held back from saying something he’d regret. You weren’t his, and he had no right to say anything, but—thinking of his daughter clinging to JJ’s legs and giggling with him stirred something ugly in his chest.

And also—seriously, what the hell? You and him? A kook and a pogue? Sure, that label had basically expired years ago, but still—how? You two were nothing alike. Different vibes, different scenes, different personalities. Everything. And now what—living in the same house? You, Liliana, and JJ?

It felt like a joke.

No, he wasn’t going to say any of that out loud. He couldn’t risk the chance you were giving him—but really? Out of everyone in the goddamn world, you picked him?

Rafe tilted his head slightly. His brows furrowed but he quickly recovered. He avoided any expression that would give away how he felt, and kept his tone flat—but his voice came out way too suggestive. “So—You and JJ, hmm?”

He cursed himself the second he heard his own tone. Clearing his throat, he adjusted his posture.

Your eyes flicked to him. You studied him for a beat, then pursed your lips. “Me and JJ what?”

No way your brain had turned to mush over the years. You were either playing dumb, or you were doing this on purpose—to mess with him.

Rafe cleared his throat again. He took a step back, glancing at the other car parked in the yard—probably the one you both used. Then his eyes landed on the two surfboards propped by the door. The sight of JJ being that settled in made his stomach churn. His eyes met yours again, voice low. “I mean... I don’t get it. When did it happen? How or where…”

Even just outside, there were traces of JJ everywhere—he didn’t want to imagine what the inside of the house looked like. Then again, he’d seen it listed as an Airbnb before, so maybe there wasn’t much to see.

But what about your place in the city?

Were JJ’s things on the coffee table? His jackets hanging by the door? Were there pictures of you, Liliana, and him smiling on the walls?

His brain needed to just stop.

This wasn’t about you. Or JJ. It was about Liliana. And still—

Shit. Fuck this.

“Rafe,” you said with a light laugh, but your tone hinted at warning. You shook your head. “No—”

Rafe didn’t let you finish. He cut you off fast. Unlike you, he wasn’t laughing. He looked serious. “I mean if Liliana sees him as her dad, and—”

“We’re not together,” you interrupted. Your voice was calm, but that alone eased something in Rafe’s chest.

He blinked. “What?”

You shrugged like it was no big deal. “We’re not together. I don’t have time to explain every second of it, but he helped me with everything. Still does.”

Rafe’s brows pulled together. He clearly couldn’t wrap his head around it. Running a hand through his hair, he shut his eyes for a second. “I just... I’m having a hard time understanding.”

“We’re supporting each other, that’s all,” you said simply.

Rafe’s voice came out almost bitter. “Like... fuck buddies?”

He hated himself for saying it. He shouldn’t have said it. He wasn’t here for this. How many times did he have to remind himself?

But damn it—he is curious.

You scrunched your face. Your eyes darted away as you shifted your weight, moving away from the doorframe. “Oh my God, Rafe, no.”

“I don’t get it.” Rafe started, but couldn’t finish. He cut himself off.

If it was nothing—then why the hell is JJ still here?

You shook your head, your voice barely a whisper. “It’s not that complicated.”

“So you’re single?” Rafe asked, trying to sound neutral—but the unease in his voice gave him away. You looked at him. For a moment, Rafe was sure you were going to throw him out. That this was it. No more chance to meet Liliana. No second chance, period.

Nice going, Rafe Cameron. Can’t even handle a five-minute doorstep conversation without fucking it up.

“Rafe,” you warned.

Rafe quickly straightened up. His tone more explanatory now. “It was just a question. I was curious.”

“Don’t be.” You said it with tired finality.

“Okay.” Rafe nodded and stepped back slightly, taking a deep breath. “By the way—I talked to my dad.”

Your eyes locked on him. Your expression tightened. Brows rose. “You did?” Your tone sounded almost surprised, like you hadn’t really expected him to go through with it.

“I did. Didn’t go great,” Rafe said with a small laugh, though it barely masked the sting. Honestly, it had gone to shit. He wasn’t even planning to talk to his dad again for a while. “If—like, I don’t know if it’ll happen, but if he ever tries to contact you, can you let me know?”

“Of course,” you said without hesitation. Rafe didn’t push it, but he still wanted to say it.

He took a deep breath. Talking about this stuff had always been hard, but with you, it still felt… easy. Like when you used to talk back then. When you were younger. “I told him not to. Just once in his life, I hope he actually listens.”

You were just about to speak, your mouth half-open, when the inner door creaked open and JJ stepped out. Quietly, but with a kind of weight to his presence. His eyes quickly scanned the both of you, then locked onto Rafe’s face. There was something sharp in his expression—like he was approaching prey, calm but deadly. You could’ve sworn he almost hated him.

He moved toward you, planting himself at your side with a protective air. Something flickered in Rafe at the sight. You folded your arms over your chest as the two locked eyes—neither of them even blinked.

JJ placed a possessive hand on your back and nodded at Rafe, then offered a hand. “Hey.”

His voice was clipped, hard. Rafe hadn’t expected anything softer anyway. Rafe’s eyes dropped briefly to JJ’s hand on your back, then met yours.

Again—hadn’t you said there was nothing going on between you two?

Because this shit didn’t look like nothing.

The way you leaned into his touch—fuck, it was so you and Rafe. Like five years ago. And seeing that—Rafe didn’t even want to think about it.

Watching something he’d lost—something he thought was his once—now standing right in front of him made his stomach twist. He was already on edge, and the sight of you two like that? It was the goddamn cherry on top.

“Hi,” Rafe said shortly. He shook JJ’s hand, not flinching even when the grip came in tighter than necessary. They’d never liked each other, and clearly, five years hadn’t changed shit. Rafe still hated him.

Only now, he had a reason.

You.

You, standing too close to him. That was reason enough to hate the bastard.

“How is she?” Rafe asked, voice low, glancing briefly at the door.

“She’s waiting,” JJ said, eyes never leaving Rafe’s face. Like he was still evaluating if the guy could be trusted.

“Sorry about the beach,” Rafe muttered, eyes on JJ. He wasn’t really sorry about the attitude—just about the fact that it happened in front of Liliana. But seeing his daughter with *him*—

Yeah, he hadn’t expected that. He’d made assumptions. All his assumptions had included you alone.

Just you and Liliana.

Not a single one of those imagined JJ Fucking Maybank in the picture. Not even once.

“Same,” JJ replied, shrugging. Tone flat, uninterested.

They were clearly tolerating each other just for Liliana’s sake. That was all this was. Toleration. And even that felt like too much for them.

Rafe looked between the two of you. There was still something unspoken hanging in the air. A tension he couldn’t place, but desperately wanted to understand.

But not now.

Now wasn’t the time.

There was something more important at stake.

“Okay,” you finally said, breaking the tension. “If you’re both ready—”

“Of course,” JJ and Rafe said at the same time.

Rafe watched you nod and head toward the door. JJ stepped aside, like he was silently telling Rafe to go in first.

When Rafe stepped inside behind you, Liliana was standing by the window in the corner of the living room. She’d dropped the toy book in her hand and was now staring at the door. Rafe’s entrance felt like it sucked all the air out of the room.

Heavy. Thick. Silent.

He isn't just nervous. He is scared.

Completely fucking terrified.

You and Rafe walked a few steps ahead while JJ came in behind and closed the door.

You looked at Liliana, then turned to Rafe, giving him a small nod.

“Rafe, this is… Liliana.”

Rafe could hear the pounding of his own heart. The only other sound was the cartoon still playing faintly on the TV. He took a few steps in, but didn’t get too close. His face was unreadable, carefully composed.

Was it the usual mask he wore with strangers?

Or was it exhaustion—leftover from everything that had happened with you?

Hard to tell.

But one thing was clear: he was trying hard to keep the fear down.

Liliana didn’t flinch. Her eyes scanned Rafe’s face with sharp, almost adult-like attention.

He looked different than she expected.

Younger.

Maybe softer.

But there was something in his eyes… something guarded, watchful. Like yours.

And God—she looked just like you.

So much like you.

Just as beautiful.

“Hi,” Rafe said, voice cracking slightly but controlled. “You must be Liliana.”

He was about to fucking shit himself. She’s just a little girl. Calm the fuck down.

Liliana tilted her head slightly, eyes narrowing. “You’re Rafe.”

A flicker of a smile tugged at Rafe’s lips. His heart somehow picked up speed.

She knew him. She knew his name.

That alone nearly knocked the breath out of him.

He nodded quickly, a little too eagerly. “Yeah, I’m Rafe.”

“Mom told me about you,” Liliana said, her voice surprisingly calm. “Is it true you live in space? You fly from planet to planet?”

You cleared your throat, clearly trying to ease the tension. “Liliana, Rafe came here tonight to meet you. But if you don’t feel comfortable—”

“No,” Liliana said quickly. Her eyes stayed on Rafe. “I can meet him.”

Rafe didn’t know what to feel about the things you’d told her. Explaining why a father wasn’t around must’ve been hell.

He gave a small nod. “Thank you.”

He wanted to hug her. God, he wanted to. But it was too soon.

Liliana was silent for a moment. Then, with the unfiltered bluntness only a child could have, she asked:

“Are you my dad?”

Rafe looked at you, waiting for confirmation.

Then his eyes flicked to JJ, who was standing right beside you. JJ took a long breath and looked away.

You gave Rafe a small nod, then turned back to Liliana, watching closely for her reaction.

“Yes,” Rafe said simply.

It was short, but all those rehearsed lines he’d practiced in front of a mirror?

Gone.

All of it.

Just—gone.

Liliana shifted in place. Then she hopped forward and climbed onto the couch. Rafe’s mouth twitched at the corners as he watched her toss her baby hair back like it was nothing.

She really was his daughter.

"Okay..." Liliana spoke while swinging her legs off the edge of the couch. "Are you gonna go back to space again?"

Rafe shifted in his seat almost instantly. His throat went dry. His expression didn’t change, but his eyes flicked over to you. He wanted to answer—but he waited for your cue.

“Lily,” Bella said gently, but with a warning tone. “What happened to being kind?”

“I was just—” Liliana shrugged, then turned back to Rafe. “Are you a liar?”

Rafe held her gaze and replied, “Well—lying’s bad. And my mission in space is over. No more space.”

Liliana studied him for a moment in silence. Then she slid off the couch, picked her toy book off the floor, sat back on the edge of the cushion, and turned her face back to the window. “We’ll see,” she murmured. “What did you even go for in the first place?”

For the first time, Rafe swallowed hard. He felt like he was being put on trial for something long closed. But the kid was right… her eyes said more than her words ever could.

Why had he even left in the first place? Why the hell did he screw it all up?

“I don’t even know,” he said quietly.

“Thank God. Finally,” Cleo said with an exaggerated sigh.

There was nothing like seeing your best friend after days apart. You smiled wide, lifting your arms as you moved toward her.

Cleo’s eyes lit up. She pulled you into a hug, her hands rubbing your back supportively. Her arms were tight around you.

“Girl, do you even know how much I missed you?”

You pulled back and lowered your head slightly, smiling at her. Ever since Cleo and Pope got married, you hadn’t had many chances to see her. Sure, you could have made time, but with everything going on with JJ, it all kind of fell apart.

“I’m sorry… I know.”

Cleo stepped back. Her gaze flicked to JJ for a split second, but she sighed and spoke to you instead. “I thought you went into hiding or something. You were completely off the radar.”

“I know,” you said with a soft laugh. “The last few days… have been rough.”

Fighting was exhausting. Of course it was. You wished none of it had happened—but at the same time, maybe it was for the best. At least now, you both stopped pretending. You were actually talking to each other again.

“And thank God, because you look amazing right now,” Cleo said, touching your arm and winking. You rolled your eyes, about to respond, when Pope suddenly jumped in, practically speed-walking in with a plate that was clearly hot.

“Hey!” he called out with a grin. He nearly ran. He set the plate on the table, then quickly pulled his hands back and blew on his fingertips.

“Hi!,” you said, fighting a laugh at his expression.

Pope winked. Then he leaned down and kissed his wife on the cheek—and you couldn’t help the tiny pang of envy that fluttered in your chest. When you heard Cleo giggle, you smiled too. Marriage really did suit them. “Thanks for coming, both of you. We really missed you guys,” Pope said warmly, slipping an arm around Cleo’s waist.

You turned when you heard JJ chuckle. He was lounging comfortably on the couch, head turned toward your group, with a grin that wasn’t exactly friendly—more like smug.

JJ raised an eyebrow. “So what you’re saying is... you’re tired of spending time with your wife?”

You sighed. God, JJ…

“What—JJ! That’s not what I meant. Cleo—come on, no!” Pope stammered, clearly panicking.

JJ just shrugged and laughed. Sarcastic as hell—but also… familiar. You looked at him with a mix of amusement and disbelief.

Cleo rolled her eyes and leaned into Pope with a possessive smirk. As if to make a point, she kissed his cheek and said, “Stop talking shit about my husband. Maybe start by looking in the mirror, tough guy.”

“God, the two of you are unbearable now. You were way more tolerable when you were just dating,” JJ muttered as he pushed himself up from the couch and walked over.

You turned toward him, taking a deep breath as he stepped beside you. “Enough, JJ,” you said, smiling despite your warning tone.

JJ gave you an innocent smile. When his eyes locked with yours, he stepped a little closer. “What? I didn’t even say anything,” he said with a shrug.

You rolled your eyes at him and looked away. He always had to be like this—sarcastic, smug. But somehow… it was the exact kind of behavior you’d grown to love. “Anyway, did you turn on the channel Lily wanted?”

JJ nodded. “Even put her favorite snacks in front of her.”

“Thank you,” you said quickly. You hadn’t even asked—or thought to ask—but he’d already taken care of it. It warmed something in your chest. You didn’t know how he could read you so well. Not just you—Liliana too.

Because whenever you needed something, JJ was there. He always had been. And just like he’d always been there for you, now he was there for Liliana too.

You were grateful. You’d always be grateful. But even while you looked into his eyes, that gnawing guilt crept in. Because the way you felt about him… wasn’t the way a friend was supposed to feel.

You weren’t supposed to love your friend like this. You were supposed to love him like family, like someone you could count on—not like someone you wanted to spend the entire day wrapped up in.

You weren’t supposed to forget all your problems when he held you. You weren’t supposed to lose track of time, lose track of your own words, just watching him talk. You weren’t supposed to wait at the door hoping he’d come back after every fight. Or look into his eyes and drift away in your thoughts like you were doing now.

“Of course,” JJ said, barely above a whisper. Even with your eyes locked on him, he didn’t look away. You wondered what he was thinking. You wished you could read his mind. You wanted to talk about that night—what it meant to him, why he really did it…

The clatter of silverware hitting the table snapped you out of it like a jolt. You broke eye contact with JJ and turned forward, playing it off like nothing happened. After Pope placed the final fork, he and Cleo sat down across from you both. Soft smiles lingered on their faces.

The music playing in the background was light and lovely. You were all clearly happy—it wasn’t hard to tell. You were with your friends, and this moment… it was one of those you’d probably look back on someday. One of a thousand little memories.

“By the way—the food looks amazing. I seriously can’t wait to dig in,” you said, picking up your fork. And you meant it—it really did look incredible.

Cleo let out a small squeal and covered part of her face with one hand. “Stop! You’re embarrassing me. I worked so hard on this.”

But then, you caught the look Pope gave her from beside her—one brow raised, his head turning slowly with a very smug grin. “I literally made everything. Cleo was watching reality show whole time.”

“What?! What a lie!” Cleo burst out laughing. She pouted and stabbed at her food with her fork, refusing to look at him.

Pope just shook his head with a chuckle, clearly accepting his fate.

I was actually enjoying being here—at this time, in this place, with these people. Even if I tried not to look at the guy standing next to me, something inside me kept screaming look at him. Everything was because of him, wasn’t it?

He gave you a life you couldn’t have fought for, a friendship you didn’t know you needed. You could’ve never imagined feeling this kind of peace. Even if you had tried, you wouldn’t have found it. But still—if they gave you the choice, you’d pick this again.

Sure, you had your share of shitty days. But still—yeah, you wouldn’t trade it.

"Whoever made this—seriously, it tastes amazing. I’m definitely finishing every plate," JJ said with a small smile. It was the first time since he walked into this house that he dropped his usual sarcasm and gave a real compliment.

Cleo narrowed her eyes at me. “You couldn’t’ve missed it that much. You literally just ate.”

I turned my head toward JJ after Cleo’s comment—he suddenly couldn’t swallow the bite in his mouth. He locked eyes with Cleo, forced himself to swallow, then took a sip of water. “Wait, what do you mean?” I asked, turning to him.

Before JJ could even say a word, Cleo jumped in fast. She leaned forward. “What do you mean what do you mean? He stayed here. I cooked, so... duh.” She rolled her eyes at JJ for a second before turning her gaze back to me.

So... he’d been here. Here. For three days. At Cleo and Pope’s house.

Our friends house.

I turned fully to JJ. He had gotten comfortable, leaning in like he belonged there. You listened closely to his breathing.

“You were here?” you asked him, disbelief in your voice.

You didn’t know what to think. You— you thought he was staying at someone else’s house. Someone else, like— maybe a woman’s. You didn’t know, and—

Fuck. Just stop.

JJ held his head high. “Yeah.” His voice was steady. Not a trace of his usual smirk. In fact, he looked you straight in the eye like he wanted to prove something. Like, for a second, he forgot Cleo and Pope were even there.

“Three days?” The shock in your voice was obvious. He wasn’t giving you what you wanted. You were hinting, subtly asking where he’d been, but he just casually answered. Didn’t even try to meet you halfway. And all you really wanted was for him to say it out loud.

“Yes,” JJ said again.

Before you even fully realized it, something inside you felt lighter. Like a cold rush washed over your body. Like— you felt relieved.

“Oh… okay.” That’s all you said. Your eyebrows lifted, and you stared at the napkin in front of you. What you were feeling was definitely relief. He didn’t owe you anything. He didn’t have to tell you anything—and he hadn’t. But you had still wondered. God, you had wondered so damn much.

Just the thought of him touching someone else, sleeping in the same bed as another woman for three whole days— it ate you alive. You couldn’t even exist inside your own home. Your thoughts were screaming to get out of your head.

You had even thought about cornering him and forcing the truth out of him. You were that angry. So pissed off at the idea that he could just come home from someone else’s bed and kiss you like nothing happened— like it was no big deal.

Of course, you didn’t say anything to him. Who were you, really? There was no you and him. You couldn’t ask questions—but you couldn’t silence your thoughts either.

And now, after all the days you spent seething with jealousy, the truth being the complete opposite left you feeling like a brand new fucking baby. Like your nerves had been surgically removed.

“What did you think?” JJ’s voice was teasing. You blinked out of your thoughts and looked up at him. He was leaning on the chair with one arm, watching you with that half-smirk.

You hesitated for a second. You were about to shrug and change the subject, but suddenly you realized how stupid that would be. “When I said you might be staying at someone else’s house… you didn’t say no.” Your tone was sharper than you meant it to be. It almost sounded like you were accusing him. And JJ’s lips curved into an even bigger smirk.

He reached up to scratch his cheek, trying to hide that dumb grin. As if he could. It was so obvious. So infuriating. JJ parted his lips and spoke clearly: “When you implied I was at another woman’s place. Let’s get that straight.” He reached for his water and took another sip.

You tried to ignore Cleo and Pope watching from across the table with wide, curious eyes. Especially Cleo’s. She looked like she was watching a rom-com play out live. You swallowed hard. Shook your head and shrugged. “What difference does it make? I asked, and you didn’t say anything. So… I just assumed.”

You were almost stammering. Your voice sounded unsure, weak.

You felt cornered. Like this asshole was playing with you the way a cat plays with a mouse. Drawing it out on purpose, watching you squirm. And he was winning. You weren’t ever going to say you were jealous. Even if he asked, you already knew the royal answer: Deny, deny, deny.

JJ leaned in closer. The smugness disappeared from his lips, replaced with something quieter, something more serious. “I wasn’t focused on that at the time. It wasn’t my priority.” His voice was calm now. He looked me right in the eyes. I couldn’t look away. I didn’t want to.

“Huh? What was your priority?”

The moment between you was shattered by Cleo’s excited voice. Her eyebrows were raised high. She was still eating from her plate like she was watching the best scene in a movie.

JJ’s eyes lingered on you a moment longer before he finally turned to Cleo. He straightened up and leaned back into the chair again. Thank God. Because the second he got too close, you totally lost your balance.

“I wanted to fix things between us and—”

Cleo cut him off, fast. Her voice was protective, almost fierce.

“And hopefully to beg for forgiveness. Because when I kicked you out, I clearly told you that’s exactly what you should do.”

You knew she loved both of you, but you liked that she was more protective of you when it came to JJ. Even after all these years, she kept reminding you—probably for the millionth time—that your friendship wasn’t just based on JJ.

“Cleo,” Pope warned gently, nudging his wife’s arm.

Cleo shrugged. “What? If you had pulled that shit, it’d take me years to forgive you. Honestly, the fact that they’re even sitting next to each other right now? That’s a damn miracle.”

Sure, it wouldn’t be fair to erase everything that happened over the years just like that. But still—you both knew who had really messed up. And because you understood why it happened, you weren't going to drag it out. If it were you, if you had to lose both JJ and Liliana at once? You’d lose your mind too.

“But they’re not us,” Pope said softly.

Cleo rolled her eyes. “What’s the difference, really?” she replied, stubborn but affectionate.

“We’re married. And they’re like... roommates. Or best friends. Or whatever,” Pope said.

Wow. That was your definition of it? Just—wow. Your lips curved despite yourself. Roommates or best friends. That was so you and JJ. Nailed it. And yet, hearing it said out loud…

“Sure,” Cleo said with a smile—but there was something else underneath her voice. Then she added, lowering her tone but keeping the sarcasm,

“I don’t remember us ever making out when we were just friends—”

Pope panicked. His voice jumped an octave. “Cake! There’s cake in the oven!”

You sighed. “Oh my God…”

So JJ had told them everything, huh? When your eyes flicked over to him, his brows were raised, mouth slightly open. Even he hadn’t seen that one coming. When he turned to you, maybe about to explain, you quickly looked away and took a deep breath.

“Lily met Rafe today,” you blurted out. No thought behind it. You hadn’t even talked about the kiss yourselves yet. And this was definitely not the time or the place. You could’ve told them, eventually. But maybe after talking it through with JJ first. Whatever—fuck it.

Cleo whipped around to you, totally caught off guard. She gave you her full attention, like she’d instantly forgotten whatever she'd just said.

“Sorry, what?”

You nodded, kind of grateful the tension had shifted elsewhere.

“Yeah. They met. It was a decision JJ and I made. And... it was fine.” You glanced over at him as you said it. You were thankful for this little detour in the conversation.

“Yeah. But she still loves me more,” JJ chimed in, wearing that familiar grin. He still looked a little tense—his body gave it away—as he hesitated, eyes on you.

“She’ll always love you more. You’ve been in her life for five years.”

You looked at him. The idea that Lily might love JJ less was absurd. His place in her heart was solid.

JJ tilted his head, a soft smile tugging at his lips. The tension that had been building between you seemed to melt away with that one innocent statement. No matter what happened, you never doubted JJ’s love for Liliana.

You nodded, a strange peace settling inside you.

“Of course.”

And once again, the moment between you was interrupted by Cleo.

“That’s so wifey and hubby thing—”

Your eyes widened. And clearly, you weren’t the only one reacting. Pope jumped up from his seat like a switch had been flipped. His voice was firm, almost like he wanted to physically cover her mouth.

“Cleo. Can you help me take the cake out?”

Cleo just shrugged. She still looked like she wanted to stay and watch whatever this was unfolding in front of her.

“You do know you can handle that on your own, babe—”

That was cute. But still, when she said stuff like that, you couldn’t help blushing.

Pope tried again, more politely.

“Please.”

Cleo sighed. “Okay.”

As the two of them left the room, a weird panic settled in your chest. You were alone at the table now. Part of you wanted to thank Pope, and the other part wanted to drag him back by the collar. You had no idea what to do. You were just... anxious. And he was still looking at you.

JJ was the first to speak, his eyes still on you.

“We didn’t really get to talk today.”

That was a lie. You’d talked a lot. Just… not about each other. But even so—what else was left to say?

About what? The fact that he’d been staying at Cleo and Pope’s for days? The kiss? Rafe?

You just nodded, silently agreeing. Was it always going to be this hard? You saw this man every day, and still the tension between you was unbearable.

JJ paused, then said, “Sorry about Cleo. You know how she is.”

You smiled and nodded quickly. After five years, you were more than used to her.

“Oh—I know.”

She was blunt, and you didn’t mind it. She was your best friend. And even if she said things a bit too directly sometimes, you loved her for it. She’d also brought one of your lingering doubts into the open today—and helped ease it.

Also—she wasn’t exactly subtle about her little hints about the two of you. Not that you hadn’t noticed.

JJ spoke hesitantly, his voice low.

“And I’m sorry for telling them about the kiss too. I was... at my lowest, and you know how every time I try to fix things, I just fuck everything up.”

His hand slipped through his hair, eyes falling to the floor.

“I couldn’t think straight. I asked them for advice instead.”

He wasn’t even looking at you.

You shook your head quickly. You didn’t want to stay mad at him anymore. You didn’t want to lose what you had.

So you acted fast.

“Okay.”

It really wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

JJ kept going like he hadn’t even heard you. His eyes stayed down, fingers fidgeting anxiously. He looked like he was barely holding it together.

“That’s why it all just spilled out. I didn’t mean to say anything. I swear, I wouldn’t have told anyone.”

“I know,” you said quietly.

You knew JJ.

If there was any malice in him, he would’ve shown it years ago.

Wasn’t he the one who drove two hours just to be there when you had a miscarriage scare?

The one who stayed with you so you wouldn’t be alone?

The one who cheered you up on the beach when Rafe didn’t want Liliana?

The one who reminded you your body is yours, and no one else gets to claim it?

Yeah.

That was JJ. He was always behind you. Beside you. Never against you. You couldn’t imagine him doing anything to intentionally hurt you. Just like you knew you couldn’t ever do that to him either. “It’s just… we haven’t even talked about what happened and—”

JJ cut you off before you could finish. His hands went up like he was surrendering, eyes shutting tight like he couldn’t handle the weight of it. “I know… We can talk when we get home, or whenever you’re ready. I’m sorry.”

He dipped his head. One hand rubbed at his forehead, still not looking at you—just sitting there, fully accepting he’d messed up.

Your gaze flicked toward the hallway where Cleo and Pope had disappeared. It was quiet. From the look of the empty room, you could tell no one was around.

Honestly, you were glad they left you two alone for a bit. And Pope trying to awkwardly save the moment was kind of funny.

Still… it was a little embarrassing how all this was playing out right in front of them.

You whipped your head toward JJ like lightning. Your lips moved before you could even think. A small, crooked smile tugged at the corner. “They won’t be back for a while… you know.”

There was no one around, but you still kept your voice low, like it was meant just for him.JJ dropped his hand from his forehead and slowly raised his head. His eyes widened.

He glanced at the door Cleo and Pope had walked through, mouth opening, closing, then opening again.

He sat up straighter, staring at you like what you’d just said was the weirdest thing in the world.

“Now—you wanna talk about it now?”

JJ nearly stammered, but reeled it in last second, clearing his throat. You shrugged. You were fighting not to look at his lips, not to let your brain wander. But they looked… distracting.

Your mind drifted—briefly—back to that kiss, and you caught yourself. Your eyes were already halfway there.

“I mean… only if you want to.” You turned your head to the side. Looking at him was getting harder by the second.

JJ nodded, barely breathing. “Yeah. Sure.”

An awkward silence settled between you. Neither of you knew who should start. You didn’t have much to explain, really. He kissed you.

But… you kissed him back.

If you didn’t want it, you could’ve pushed him away, slapped him even. But all you wanted was to pull him closer and kiss him again.Still, a part of you was terrified he regretted it.

Knowing he might feel that way—it scared the hell out of you. But even more than that, the idea that it could ruin what you had—that it could wreck your friendship—was worse.

Even if you were the only one feeling this way, there was still a little girl to think about. If JJ left… how the hell would you explain it to her?

How would you survive missing him?The words were stuck in your throat, fighting each other like a storm. You wanted to talk. You really did.

But right now, right in this moment, the idea of being with him was both the thing you wanted most… and the thing you feared the most.

Because if he didn’t want you back, It would be the end of a years-long friendship.

Maybe you’d never fix it again. Feelings always had a way of screwing everything up.

Finally, JJ broke the silence. He straightened up, like he’d decided to just say it. “I felt like that in the moment. I just wanted the fighting to stop, and I wouldn’t normally do something like that but… everything was a mess. We were both pissed, and I kissed you without thinking. And I’m sorry for that. It just—”

He didn’t think you regretted it, did he? Because you didn’t. Not even close. You’d do it again right now if you could.

You didn’t even know what happened. Your mouth opened and the words flew out before your brain could stop them. “I kissed you back.”

JJ froze. His mouth stopped moving. “What?”

“If I didn’t want to keep going… I would’ve pushed you away.” You would’ve. You wouldn’t have let him stay near you for another second. But those stupid, intense feelings got the better of you. You couldn’t even think straight around him.

Especially when he was close.

The shock was written all over JJ’s face. “What do you mean?”

This time, you spoke more gently. You couldn’t tell him the real reason you didn’t stop him. Not while he still saw you as just a friend.“We weren’t in a good place. Emotionally, I mean. We were both angry, and—look, you haven’t been with anyone in almost a year, and I haven’t… not since Liliana was born.”

JJ jumped in fast, nervous. “I haven’t touched anyone either. I mean—we’re in the same boat.”

The confession had been sitting on your chest the whole time. He always came back late from dates. So you just assumed—like, really, you just assumed.

You never actually asked, but still…

Had there really never been anyone? Why not?

Anyone else in his position would’ve slept with a dozen girls by now, maybe had a string of flings.

Especially with JJ—considering his status on the island—you figured once he went to the mainland, his options would multiply.

But hearing the opposite? That was… kind of flattering? Maybe. You weren’t sure. But God, it made you happy. How could it not?

Knowing there hadn’t been someone else—that was oddly satisfying.

Your lips tugged up for a second before you caught yourself and shook your head. “Oh—so it was like, a dry spell thing? I don’t know. Maybe it was just something we *both* needed in the moment and… it kinda just happened.”

You kept your voice low. You had no idea what you were even trying to say, especially after that confession. Honestly, all you wanted to do was pull him in and kiss him again.

JJ let out a crooked grin. “So basically, I helped... defuse the situation. That what you're saying?”

Your eyebrows lifted. A small chuckle slipped out as you leaned back. “So what—you’re saying we should do it every time we fight?”

You joked, watching the way his expression instantly panicked—pure delight lit up inside you.

JJ squirmed in his seat, throwing his hands up like he was ready to defend himself. “No—like—I mean—that’s not what I meant, but—”

You couldn’t help it. You burst into laughter. The way he freaked out—it was… adorable. Genuinely adorable. After a beat, you cut him off, pretending to be serious.“I’m messing with you.”You played with your tone—half teasing, half gentle.

He watched your reaction, relief spreading across his face with a hint of surprise. But you didn’t stop.

This time, your voice came out more serious. Or at least, trying to sound serious. Even you couldn’t tell anymore. “But I mean… if you’re offering—”

His surprise melted into something giddy. JJ caught your bluff immediately. He leaned in, eyes lighting up with excitement. “Yeah. Yeah, I mean—we could try it again sometime. Don’t know if we’ll fight again, but…”

You nodded, smiling. You liked this game you were playing with him. Especially watching him stumble over his words and avoid eye contact like that— “Yeah, maybe… if we do.” You gave him your approval with a grin that was hard to contain.

“Yeah… maybe.” JJ ran a hand through his hair, pausing for a second before locking eyes with you. “It was nice, by the way.”

You froze. You stared at him for a moment, trying to figure out if he’d actually said that. Once you realized he meant it, you spoke.

“Really?”

JJ nodded, dead serious. “Wouldn’t have guessed you hadn’t had any practice in five years. Felt pretty damn natural.”

You noticed the smile—subtle, almost too subtle—but it was there. Just like the way his gaze kept flicking to your lips… and then slightly lower. You noticed. Oh, you definitely noticed.

Because you were doing the exact same thing.You really wanted to see where this was going. Hell, you even wondered if he’d kiss you again tonight.

Even if it was just a thought—one you knew probably wouldn’t become real.

“Oh, stop.” You turned your head, trying to hide the shy smile spreading across your face.

JJ reached over and tapped your knee for attention, laughing. “I’m serious! I felt like a total amateur and you were like, a fucking pro.”

He exaggerated with his hands and expressions, and you had to fight the urge to roll your eyes.

He couldn’t say shit like that. He just—he shouldn’t.

You turned toward him, looking him dead in the face. “What a big liar.”

JJ raised his brows. “What? I swear, it’s true!”

Before you knew what was happening, your chair shifted. JJ had grabbed it from underneath and pulled you closer. He was nearer now. His eyes locked on yours, one arm casually resting over the back of your chair like he wasn’t doing the most right now.

But you could see it—the mischief in his eyes.

He seriously needed to calm down. Because you were starting to get the wrong idea.

The second he leaned in slightly, you snapped out of it. You caught how his eyes briefly dipped to your smile. It was quick, but you saw it.

You pressed your hand to his chest and turned your head away. “Stop.”

JJ shook his head, fidgeting like he was trying to get your attention again. “No. You’re just naturally talented.” Even though you thought he was just joking, something about his tone… made it hard to tell.

It was messing with your head. Actually—it was starting to make you question everything.

This time, your eyes dropped to the floor.Were you blushing? Maybe. But the way your stomach fluttered? That was the real giveaway. Thank God he couldn’t see that.

“I don’t believe you.” You still hadn’t looked back at him.

You shook your head, smiling to yourself. But his eyes—yeah, they were still on you. And he wasn’t done messing around.

“Want me to prove it?” JJ took the hand that was resting on his chest and wrapped his fingers around yours, gently pulling free.

Your eyes shot to him instantly. He grinned, clearly proud of himself.

Of course he was.

He was trying to get you to look at him.

Your mouth parted slightly—like you were about to say something—but you stopped yourself.

He was just playing. Just a game.

Fine.

If it’s a game, then let it be a game. If he thought you were gonna just sit there and melt, he had another thing coming.

You turned toward him fully, matching his energy. “Oh, you wanna prove it?” There was a smirk on your lips now—teasing, sharp.

He noticed. You saw that familiar spark in his eyes flicker alive again. He licked his lips. “Only if you want me to.” The softness in his words… the tone of his voice—

You couldn’t tell if he was still playing or if he’d just crossed some invisible line.

But for a moment, you were filled with anger. The way he was treating it like a game—it pissed you off. But you bit your tongue not to show it.

“You wanna kiss me?” The words came out teasing, but your eyes had narrowed. You didn’t regret it for a second. If he was gonna play games, then fine—you’d play harder. You wanted to push his limits. Still, your heart skipped a beat with every word.

JJ let out a soft laugh, part breath, part amusement. He leaned back a little and adjusted himself in the chair. “Always so straightforward, huh?” He shook his head, and you had to stop yourself from smiling at that damn grin of his. The moment you noticed his eyes sweeping over you, you straightened up.

He tilted his head and kept his eyes on you.

You leaned in slightly. “Would you have preferred I dragged it out and acted like an idiot instead?”

“Maybe.” He shrugged. That classic Maybank smirk on his face. The one that hadn’t changed in years. The one that usually got to you.

You laughed. “Are you flirting with me, Maybank?” The question was clear, but the subtext was even louder. And when you looked into his eyes—you could see it. He was having fun.

You leaned back, resting against your chair. “Would you want me to?” JJ asked. He reached behind you, his fingers playing with the ends of your hair. His eyes flicked from your face to your hair as he twirled a strand between his fingers.

“So I’m the only one on this island you haven’t flirted with yet, huh?” You pulled your hair forward, away from his hand. When you did, you caught that tired smile on his lips. He rubbed his eyes with his free hand.

He squinted, pretending to think. “You and maybe a couple others,” he said, like he was trying to get under your skin. His voice had a playful, taunting edge to it.

His hand—still behind you—slid to your shoulder. He started tracing small circles there, and a chill ran down your spine. The air wasn’t cold. It was actually a nice evening. But his touch? It messed with your head. It burned and tingled all at once.

You tried to act like it didn’t affect you, but your sharp inhale gave you away. You looked him in the eye. JJ was already looking at you.

“What’s all this about?” you asked, eyes narrowed. “Figured you’d check me off the list while you’re back on the island?”

JJ laughed. That stupid grin again—it was seriously getting on your nerves. You were getting more and more pissed and—

Wait.

You were jealous, weren’t you?

“If I’d wanted to, I would’ve done it five years ago,” he said. “Only one I see is you.”

His words—combined with that little realization—threw you off for a second. He was just playing. That’s all this was. His usual game. Nothing new.

You sighed and turned your head away. This boy was exhausting.

When you looked away, JJ let out a breath of his own. “Soo… a kiss?” His tone was playful, as always. But underneath it—there was something else. Hope.

You turned to him, that teasing smirk on your face. “In your dreams.” You leaned in slightly when you said it, laughing. You may have wanted it, deep down, but he was still just playing.

“Yeah— I hope so.” He nodded, and you could almost see him replaying that sentence a thousand times in his head.

You were about to say something else when a voice cut in.

“We’re back,” Cleo announced, holding a plate stacked with slices of cake.

The second JJ heard her, he shot up like he’d been caught. You, Pope, and Cleo stared at him, confused. “Nope. I think we should go home,” he said, his voice bouncing between a joke and actual intention.

You exhaled hard when it clicked what he was trying to do. You grabbed his arm. Met his eyes. “JJ. Sit down.”

JJ looked from Pope to you. There was a tiny pause. “Yes, ma’am,” he said, sitting back down immediately. That sly grin was back. You could’ve punched him.

Pope furrowed his brows, glancing between you and JJ, clearly lost. “What the hell just happened?”

JJ turned to you, about to explain. “Well, we were kinda—”

“Talking about nothing,” you cut in quickly. You knew damn well he was doing this on purpose.

JJ chuckled. His eyebrows raised, eyes scanning your face. “Is that what we were doing?”

“Shut up,” you snapped without missing a beat. You sighed, biting your lip. This boy was never gonna change.

“What the hell’s going on here?” Cleo asked, setting the plate on the table and plopping down in the chair across from you two.

You glanced at JJ. Took a quick second to assess him before speaking. “He’s getting cocky ‘cause we made up.”

“And she likes it,” JJ said, nodding proudly, like it was some kind of win.

You rolled your eyes, grinning despite yourself. “Yeah, sure I do.”

The house was almost holding its breath when you got back. A heavy silence settled over everything — a strange mix of calm and tension woven into the night. As you took off your shoes in the dim living room light, the only sounds were the faint, rhythmic breaths from somewhere deeper inside. Lily was already asleep.

You glanced over at JJ, who was slowly making his way down the stairs. You rested your elbow on the armrest, hand propped under your chin. His shirt was wrinkled, and his eyes were a little red from exhaustion.

“She asleep?” you asked in a low voice. No matter what, you didn’t want Liliana to wake up.

JJ tilted his head slightly, a soft, tired smile playing on his lips. When he reached the bottom step, he stretched slowly and nodded.

“Out like a light. Didn’t even need a bedtime story,” he murmured back, his voice just as quiet as yours.

Your eyebrows lifted a little, lips parting in a faint smile.

“John B and Sarah must’ve worn her out.”

JJ gave a lazy shrug, but his eyes still held that sleepy warmth.

“Probably.”

As he walked toward you, his eyes flicked briefly to the TV. You followed his gaze — the screen was still on, playing something low in the background. You’d turned it on when you got back, but you hadn’t really been paying attention. When you looked back, his gaze had returned to you — focused, closer now.

His eyes slowly scanned your face like he was trying to figure something out. Really looking. You could feel it — his eyes taking in every detail: your eyes, your hair, your lips.

“Did you do something?” he asked, tone slightly suspicious, like he was trying to catch something he couldn’t quite name.

Your brows lifted slowly. Your hand instinctively went to your hair, wondering if something was on your face.

“What do you mean?” you asked, brushing your cheek like you were checking for smudges or crumbs.

“You look really good.”

Your hand dropped, eyes widening. Your heartbeat picked up, thudding in your chest like it suddenly forgot how to keep a rhythm.

You tried to remember if he’d ever said things like that before. Compliments like this… Did he usually do that? You weren’t even sure if you had noticed. But now it felt like it was too much.

Not too much in a bad way. More like… it made you aware. And you knew you hadn’t felt this way before — at least, not like this. But lately, it was like every sentence out of his mouth made your heart skip.

You tilted your head down slightly, catching yourself before it turned into full-blown shyness. You squared your shoulders and tried to steady your face.

“No,” you said, voice soft but steady. “Actually… I’d say I’m just tired.”

JJ smirked faintly, his eyes still exploring your expression. For a second, he paused like he could see you were trying to hide something. Then his head tilted slightly, a familiar gleam in his eyes.

“You always look good,” he said. “I just said it weird.”

You looked away for a second, then let out a small, genuine smile.

“Thanks,” you murmured, a blush creeping up your cheeks. You could feel the heat spreading fast. Your eyes dropped to the floor, but no matter where you looked, your thoughts weren’t letting go. So you lifted your head again, lips parting with a quiet sigh.

“So… what’s your deal?”

JJ’s gaze met yours. His brows lifted with curiosity.

“What do you mean?”

“This whole flirting thing…” you said, drawing vague circles in the air with your hands. The sentence carried all your confusion with it. JJ’s eyes sparkled slightly, and yours drifted from his lips to his eyes.

“Flirting?” he echoed, the corner of his mouth curling into a smirk. “This is just me being me.”

You tilted your head, narrowing your eyes like you were trying to solve a puzzle. For a second, you wondered if you were the one overthinking it — but you shut that thought down fast.

“As far as I remember,” you said, voice half-teasing but sincere, “you haven’t offered to kiss me even once in the past five years.”

JJ let out a laugh, leaning slightly toward you with a playful glint in his eye.

“Did I not?” he said, clearly entertained. “Damn shame.”

“JJ…” you said, his name coming out like a warning — soft, but full of meaning.

You hated that a part of you felt hopeful when he acted like this. Hated it.

He sighed, raising his hands like he was defending himself.

“Look— I’m just trying to keep the peace, alright? Maybe I’m being a little shit about it, but that’s all it is. If it’s not working for you—”

“No!” you said quickly, cutting him off without even thinking. “I didn’t say that.”

Your words came out rushed, breath uneven. You regretted it instantly, but it was too late — that smirk was already creeping onto JJ’s face.

He locked eyes with you, balancing on that line between serious and teasing.

“So you do like it?”

You opened your mouth, but no words came out. Your lips moved, but your voice got caught somewhere in your throat. And then he moved — slowly circling the couch, eyes never leaving yours. His steps were steady, deliberate. When he sat down beside you, his knees brushed yours. He was close.

He grinned like he was swallowing a laugh.

“Didn’t know you were such a dirty girl, sweetheart.”

Your eyebrows shot up. That kind of comment definitely threw you off.

“Stop,” you said, frowning — but you couldn’t stop the smile tugging at your lips.

“What? I didn’t even do anything,” JJ said, shrugging. His expression, though, said otherwise.

“You’re just… so fucking annoying sometimes.”

Your voice was laced with sarcasm, but your heart was pounding like hell.

JJ narrowed his eyes, studying you. “Yeah? You look pissed,” he said, his voice softening, like he was trying to read you.

You leaned forward on the couch, closing the distance between you two until there was barely a breath between your faces. “Does that turn you on?” you asked, locking your eyes with his.

JJ’s eyes widened. His eyebrows shot up and he leaned back slightly. “What?”

“What do you mean ‘what’? Surprised now that I’m speaking your language?” you teased, letting out a laugh that was part amused, part nervous. Your heart was pounding, but this game—being this close to him—was both terrifying and addictive.

“I just… wasn’t expecting that,” JJ said, tossing his hair back. His hand slid through it as he tilted his head to the side.

You raised your brows and stepped in closer. “Yeah? So you prefer me pissed off all the time, or—”

JJ laughed, throwing his hands up. “Woah! Okay! Calm down.”

You giggled too, tilting your head and winking. “Or maybe you'd rather practice like you said before?”

Silence fell. The air between you buzzed with something heavy. JJ didn’t say a word. He just kept staring, studying your face like it held some answer. Whatever this was, it made you shift uncomfortably. He didn’t look away.

You spoke softly, your eyes scanning him. “Cat got your tongue now? You suddenly got real quiet.”

JJ pursed his lips and looked away with a slight scowl. “Stop playing.”

You shrugged with a faint smirk. You kind of liked getting under his skin. “Whatever you want.” Another beat of silence passed before you changed the subject, more gently this time. “Were you happy today? With the whole Rafe thing and, you know…”

JJ turned his head toward you slowly and took a deep breath, like your question was heavier than it sounded. He took his time before answering, eyes steady on yours. “Liliana welcomed me. That made me happy.” His voice dropped lower, almost to a whisper, and he looked down at his hands. “She still loves me more.” Just like he said at Pope’s house… but this time, it felt like he was saying it to himself, not to you.

“JJ…” you said softly, placing a hand on his chest to bring his attention back.

It worked. JJ looked up with a quiet “Hmm?” and when his eyes met yours, he looked… innocent. Like a kid.

“She’ll always love you first,” you said, without a hint of doubt in your voice. Maybe saying that would hurt Rafe if he ever heard it—but you weren’t going to lie. Not about this.

The hardness in JJ’s face slowly melted. His lips relaxed. “She will, won’t she?” he asked, voice barely holding steady. You knew he questioned it. But no matter what, JJ would always be in Liliana’s life—as long as he wanted to be.

You moved your hand from his chest to his cheek, brushing his skin gently with your thumb. “Of course. No one can change that.”

JJ leaned into your touch, shifting slightly closer. “I just… panicked, you know?”

You nodded. “I know,” you said, voice low and warm.

JJ parted his lips like he was about to say something, then stopped. He closed his eyes, pressing his cheek into your hand, and let the words spill out. “You and Liliana… you’re my family.”

Something fluttered in your chest. Those words hit deep. You couldn’t lose him. And just like you couldn’t lose him, you wouldn’t let him lose you two either. No way. “There’s no other way to see it. You are my family. And I know Liliana feels the same.”

JJ leaned in, guilt and longing flickering in his eyes. “I still feel like I owe you.”

You exhaled deeply. As much as this whole thing still hurt, knowing he was hurting more changed something in you. “It was just a misunderstanding,” you said, not letting him go further. It was done. You’d closed that chapter. You didn’t want to think about those days anymore.

But JJ wasn’t done. “I left Liliana. I left you and—”

You gripped his cheek firmly and lifted his lowered head. You hated seeing him like that, hunched over in regret. It was just a mistake. And that’s all it would ever be. You weren’t going to revisit it again. “JJ. It’s over. We talked about it. We understood each other. That’s enough. That’s what matters.”

JJ closed his eyes, then opened them again. “I’ll never do that again.” His gaze was heavy, like he was begging you to believe him. Almost desperate.

You smiled at him. You wanted to shift the mood, bring back some lightness. You couldn’t stand seeing him so down—and never would. No matter what darkness followed him, you’d fight it. “As if I’d let you,” you said, moving in a little closer.

JJ chuckled, lips curving. “God bless that kiss.”

You rolled your eyes. “Oh Jesus.” You were about to run your hand through his hair when JJ reached up and held your hand to his cheek, pressing a soft kiss into your palm. Your heart skipped a beat. A warm rush spread through your chest.

“What, am I wrong?” he murmured casually.

You stammered. “No. No… I’m thankful for that kiss too.”

Honestly? Your brain was fried. No, really. You weren’t okay—and you probably wouldn’t be for a while. You couldn’t even remember what you’d said a second ago.

“Right?”

“Yeah…” you breathed out, barely audible. You didn’t even know what you were agreeing to anymore. All you knew was—you were close. Too close. And this closeness… it was dizzying. Your breath caught as your eyes wandered over his face. God, you hated him. So much.

Then your eyes met again. Silence. Heavy and thick.

JJ’s voice came out like a whisper. “Are you thinking about kissing me?”

His voice snapped you out of it. You shook your head quickly, eyes wide. “Oh my god, JJ…” you said, yanking your hand away. You shifted awkwardly on the couch, leaning back like that would give you space. Your eyes were still wide.

JJ tilted his head, that smug smirk back on his lips. “What? You were staring at my mouth. Are you a perv?”

You had been. Without even realizing it. And now you hated yourself for letting him affect you that much. But you were still thinking about it. That moment he kissed your palm.

“I wasn’t— Fuck off…” you said, flustered. Your voice shook, but not from anger—because he caught you.

JJ grinned. “What? No—”

“I said go!” you snapped, shoving him back.

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