roththeprimordial
roththeprimordial
RothThePrimordial
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roththeprimordial · 2 days ago
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Whisper: You know, Mimic, your not gonna get away with this. Duo/Mimic: You know, you really shouldn't be inside, Whisper. You're more of an OUTDOOR DOG. Whisper: What does that mean!? -Later- (Whisper stands outside tied to a pole) Whisper: Are you kidding me!? This is so humiliating... I'm an elite soldier, a member of the Diamond Cutters! And I'm tied out here like some kind of- (A chipmunk comes by as Whisper gets on all fours and chases it around the pole while barking) Whisper: RAA! RAA! RAA! RAA! RAA! RAA! RAA! RAA! RAA! (Whisper is pulled back after wrapping the leash around the pole) Whisper: What is this!? This rope was a lot longer a second ago and now it's much shorter! What kind of black magic is this!?
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roththeprimordial · 4 days ago
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Shadow: So, in essence, we’ll sneak in through the vents. Me and Omega will make a distraction and Rouge will snatch up the Chaos Emerald. Any questions?
Rouge: Uhh, yeah, why are we making the plan at your apartment and not at G.U.N. HQ?
Shadow: It’s a top secret mission and Eggman has been bugging G.U.N. We have to be super careful or else-
(The door opens as Lanolin walks in with a horse Sattle tucked under her arm)
Lanolin: Hey, Shadow. Are you ready for ‘Sattle Night’? Oh… hey Rouge, Omega… Didn’t realize you had visitors over, Shadow…
Shadow: Uhh… Lanolin, I texted you earlier.
Lanolin: Oh, well I’ve been having problems with my phone lately…
Shadow: I’m having an important debrief with Team Dark. We can have our… ‘Sattle Night’ next week.
Lanolin: Okay then… I guess I’ll see you later.
(Lanolin leaves as Rouge and Omega stare at Shadow)
Omega: WHY DOES THE SHEEP MOBIAN HAVE A KEY TO YOUR APARTMENT?
Shadow: … In case of emergencies…
Rouge: … And why did Lanolin have a horse’s Sattle with her-
Shadow: Any further questions involving Lanolin or the Sattle, and I swear to Chaos I’ll chaos control you both into the heart of the Sun…
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roththeprimordial · 4 days ago
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Lanolin: Hey, Shadow, I've been wondering... Do you ever wonder what our kids would look like? (Shadow chokes on his coffee) Shadow: Wha-What!? Lanolin: Calm down, I'm just saying hypothetically, what do you think our kids would look like? If we had any. Shadow: Oh, well, in that case, I think they would look either one of two ways; A sheep with a dark coat, or a hedgehog with a white coat. Plus they could have more features similar to us; Similar hair styles, chaos control, your white hair, maybe my chest fur, our love of coffee, maybe hate Sonic, you know, things like that. Lanolin: ... Wait... White hedgehog? Chest fur? Chaos control?... Shadow... You don't think that Silver is actually-.... Shadow: W-What? No, no... That's ridiculous. That's just a one out of a million chance that Silver could actually be our son. He doesn't act anything like us, plus he doesn't even like coffee. Lanolin: Yeah, I guess I was just overthinking things. (Silver suddenly teleports in) Shadow: Silver? What are you doing here? Silver: Just testing out the range of my Chaos Control abilities. (Silver drinks a cup of coffee) Lanolin: Since when did you start drinking coffee? Silver: I don't know, I had the sudden urge to start drinking coffee. Even started to eat the beans, I don't know why. I've also started to become more irritated with Sonic recently, he's just become so annoying. Anyway, I'll get out of your guys hair, see ya! (Silver teleports away as Shadow and Silver stand there in shock as they both have the same apophony) Shadow: So... Uhh... I guess we're thinking the same thing right now, correct? Lanolin: Correct... Shadow: So... Uhh... Do you want to see a movie? Lanolin: Nope, still processing this massive earthshattering realization. Shadow: Oh, same dude.
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roththeprimordial · 5 days ago
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SpongeBob: Since we're all gonna die, there's one more thing I want to get off my chest... I did not care for Jaws. Jimmy: ... What? SpongeBob: Did NOT CARE for Jaws. Timmy: How can you even say that, SpongeBob? SpongeBob: Didn't like- Didn't like it. Jimmy: I-It's SO GOOD, it's the greatest movie ever made! SpongeBob: This is what everyone always says, whatever they say 'Oh, it's- Timmy: Richard Dreyfuss, Roy Scheider, I mean, you never- STEVEN SPIELBERG AS DIRECTOR! SpongeBob: Fine, FINE actors and director. Did not like the movie. Danny: Why didn't you like it? SpongeBob: Couldn't get into it. Jimmy: EXPLAIN yourself, why didn't you like it? SpongeBob: It INSISTS upon itself, Jimmy... Jimmy: ... What? SpongeBob: It INSISTS upon itself... Jimmy: What does that even mean? Timmy: BECAUSE IT HAS A VALID POINT TO MAKE, IT'S INSISTANT!!! SpongeBob: It takes so long getting in, and I could barely stay awake during the first shark attack. And then all the townspeople act like idiots and they find the wrong shark and-... You know, I didn't even see the climax of the movie. I never saw it. Timmy: YOU'VE NEVER SEEN THE CLIMAX OF JAWS!? Zim: How can you say you didn't like it if you haven't even given it a chance? Jimmy: I agree with Zim, it's unfair. SpongeBob: I have tried on three separate occasions to get through it. I get to the scene near the climax where they get on the fishing boat to find the shark- Jimmy: Yeah, it's a cool scene. It's a great scene. SpongeBob: No, it's not a great scene! It's so boring I can't even keep my eyes open. THAT'S where I loose interest. Timmy: BECAUSE IT'S SUSPENSEFUL! Jimmy: Timmy's right, you just don't understand the buildup of suspense in a scene. SpongeBob: ... I love Sharknado. That is my answer to that statement. Jimmy: Exactly. SpongeBob: Well, there you go. Jimmy: ... Whatever... Timmy: ... I liked Sharknado too...
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roththeprimordial · 5 days ago
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Ese we
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roththeprimordial · 7 days ago
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Lanolin: Alright new Restoration recruits, here is a little film meant to inform you on the basics of what you'll be doing here at the Restoration and what the Restoration is all about. Alright, Tangle, roll the film! (Lanolin steps aside as the lights turn off and the digital projector turned on) (The projector shows a video of Shadow sitting on a bed with an uncomfortable look as Lanolin walks over and sits in his lap in her underwear) Shadow: I-... I don't know about this, Lanolin. Lanolin: Oh, come on, Shadow. You and me are the only ones who will ever see this film, I just wanna see what we look like. Shadow: Uhh... Well-... Okay, if you say so. (The crowd gasps as Lanolin, Tangle, and Whisper stand in the back of the room and watches. Lanolin watches in horrified shock as the film 'progresses') Tangle: I'm not sure, but I may have clicked on the wrong .mov file. Lanolin: Yeah, NO FUCKING SHIT, Tangle!
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roththeprimordial · 8 days ago
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Tangle: Hey, Lanolin, say it.
Lanolin: No.
Tangle: Please?
Lanolin: NO.
Tangle: Come on! I’ll be your best friend!
Lanolin: NO!
Tangle: I’ll give ya $40 if you say it!
Lanolin: … *Sigh*… ‘Who’s leg do you have to hump to get a pint of Guinness around here?’
Tangle: Haha! Worth it!
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roththeprimordial · 8 days ago
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Character redesign cоmm for BurnerPotato @ twitter
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roththeprimordial · 9 days ago
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a joke Sonic OC i whipped up a while back: Andre the Jackass. He certainly lives up to his name.
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roththeprimordial · 9 days ago
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For Whisper it’s bath time. For Lanolin it’s wrath time
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roththeprimordial · 9 days ago
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Shadolin Genderswap By Spidy
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Basically a genderswap Shadolin piece.
I call them Shade and Fleece, both very awkward and have never been in a relationship before.
Male Lanolin design inspired by Mutton Chop on X. Couldn't find the original artist behind the Fem Shadow design I found. Sorry.
Great art piece commission by Spidy on X.
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roththeprimordial · 9 days ago
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Timmy: I've been having this weird awkward thing going on between me and Jimmy. If you snapchat a picture of your THING to your boy and he screenshots it... Who's gay? Squidward: SIR, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE STOP COMING TO THIS FUCKING DRIVETHRU!
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roththeprimordial · 9 days ago
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Tangle: Opps! Got your mental illness!
Lanolin: … You give that back. It was a GIFT from my MOTHER!
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roththeprimordial · 9 days ago
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Shadolin Heart-Shaped Hand
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Commission by procyonsfw_star on X.
Art base by KureNaiZ1 on X.
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roththeprimordial · 10 days ago
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Eddy: Remember, Lumpy, make the sucker feel good. Then we reel ‘em in!
(Ed knocks at the door)
Rolf: Hello?
Ed: I love you.
(Rolf slams the door)
Double D: I think you laid it on a TINSY bit there, Ed.
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i live for eene/spongebob crossover parodies (pls ignore the poorly drawn bg)
i really need to draw ed more
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roththeprimordial · 10 days ago
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Cоmm for OriginComics98 @ twitter
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roththeprimordial · 10 days ago
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Jimmy: Oh, hey Timmy, SpongeBob. Where have you two been?
Timmy: Oh, I just had Cosmo and Wanda teleport me and SpongeBob into several books. Thought it would be something fun we could do together.
Jimmy: That sounds nice. What books did you explore?
Timmy: One of them was Huckleberry Finn.
Jimmy: … What?
Timmy: What’s the problem?
SpongeBob: Hey, Timmy, what does ‘N***** Jim’ mean?
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