DEPTH OVER DISTANCE EVERY TIME, MY DEAR AND THIS TREE OF OURS MAY GROW TALL IN THE WOODS BUT IT'S THE ROOTS THAT WILL BIND US HERE TO THE GROUND DEPTH OVER DISTANCE WAS ALL I ASKED OF YOU AND I MAY BE FOOLISH TO FALL AS I DO STILL THERE'S STRENGTH IN THE BLINDNESS noah runcorn
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GREENGRASS, DAPHNE:
WHEN: January 20th, 1998 - 15:23 WHERE: The Slytherin Common Room WHO: @rvncorns
Quidditch wasn’t something that Daphne particularly cared about - but she could appreciate it when her house was the one who was victorious. The brightness in the common room, the excitement and cheer in the air - it could even make her crack the smallest trace of a smile. Daphne made a point to find Noah, wanting to congratulate him on his work as the Captain. She dropped down on the couch next to him, offering him a bottle of Butterbeer. “Cheers, Captain.” She hummed, watching him curiously. Noah was an interesting guy - the least easy to read of all the boys in Slytherin. The rest of them had obvious priorities and goals; Noah was the odd one out. And Daphne wanted to unravel him - discover where he stood. She had a feeling their ideals might align more closely than either expected. This was a perfect opportunity to begin doing so.
nothing mattered besides the fact that the slytherins won. they won the quidditch game, the first one since quidditch was re-allowed, and noah was fucking buoyant. it shouldn’t have mattered this much, a school quidditch game should have been insignificant in the scheme of things, but it was a good thing that happened to noah when so few things did. the entire house was happy, too. credit was being thrown at both him and tracey, and for once sharing it wasn’t a problem. he watched the chatter and buzz of the common room, quiet contentment radiating off of him.
he felt the sofa underneath him shift when someone sat down and he looked up with slight surprise to see daphne beside him. he took the bottle of butterbeer with a nod and smile. “ thanks, ” he said, opening and taking a large sip. he shifted where he sat, angling himself towards her. “ did you come to the game ? or did you just hear we won ? ”
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MACDOUGAL, MORAG
Her eyebrows furrowed, head shaking. Snape had never been the most reasonable of teachers, that much Morag knew, and maybe she should not be surprised, but she was. “That sucks.” She paused, eyed the paintings around them for a moment. “At least it’s not detention with the Carrows, though, hm?” What a depressing bright spot. She wanted to take back her words and stomp on them. They took the last good thing from me. Morag looked at Noah and for the first time saw something inside of him that she felt, too. On the pitch – and everywhere else, from her point of view – he was competition, but right now they were on the same side. “I know.” The thought of not being able to fly, of not being able to occupy herself with strategies and game plans — it was, in all honesty, a bit of a terrifying one. Quidditch kept her sane. “I need it. I need to be able to fucking fly.” She nodded, then. “And yeah. I agree with you. That the Gryffindor’s team got cut sucked for them, yeah, but that was on them, too. This was just completely unwarranted. We didn’t do shit.”
" it does, ” he agreed dully. his solemn expression didn’t shift when she offered idea of it not being with the carrow’s a consolation. it was better, he’ll certainly acknowledge that later when he’s serving the detention, but now it didn’t feel that way. he casted one last look down the hall towards snape’s office — he wished he could march in there and hex some sense in the man, or maybe just shoot a curse towards him for the fun of it, but he only sighed and let his gaze turn back towards morag. “ i know — when i fly, everything else disappears. the carrows, the fucking war — everything. ” maybe it wasn’t the best thing to so quickly forget about things that could hurt or harm with one tiny slip, but noah had always been able to easily lose himself completely in the few things that he loved ( that was how coping mechanisms works at their best, wasn’t it ? ). “ with the way hogwarts is going, it might as well just be renamed azkaban. ”
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NOTT, THEODORE
tell me this: what’s us ? i’m not a part of anything here.
“i’m not here for a pity party in your name,” theo says, after successfully not flinching at noah’s words. he’s not going to agree or disagree with him — the slytherin alliance unspoken between them all was shaky at best, always with a constant reminder that no one really truly knows everyone’s affiliations, and who’d betray whom. theo knows who he’s loyal to — tracey, first and foremost, blaise. daphne, to a slightly lesser extent. pansy, noah, millicent — theo’s not going to stick his neck out for them, but he can admit to himself that he doesn’t want them in any sort of trouble. he could throw draco in the last category, childhood best friends memories dying hard, and he has no secret love for crabbe and goyle.
“i don’t care who it means to that we’ll protect tracey, i’m still going to do it. it’s what she deserves.” he shifts uncomfortably at the admittance of affection for tracey, as if this whole conversation didn’t already prove the exact same fucking thing. his mind jumps to noah’s younger sister, and pulls a face. “i’m not going to threaten your sister, merlin. at least, unless i need to. just wanted to let you know that this thing with tracey wasn’t — it’s not okay.”
noah grimaced and shook his head. " i didn’t ask for one. ” maybe he should have worded that better, but the divide that had bloomed between him and the other slytherins this year was more noticeable than ever before. in years’ past, he would have been more reticent when it came to disagreements — small, large, whatever — for sake of maintaining image and some semblance of peace. now, though, now he felt there was no room for that, especially when his own silence was indication that maybe he didn’t disagree with the prevalent idea that most, if not all, of the slytherins would support the death eaters if it came to choosing a side. the fact was he felt no attachment to most of them, except millicent, for certain, and surely tracey.
“ if tracey needs help and i can do something, yeah, i’m not just going to ignore it and do nothing. tracey’s my friend, and i agree. it is what she deserves. ” he kept his gaze met with theo’s evenly. “ tracey’s the best out of all us, i’m sure you know that. ” noah shrugged his shoulders and pulled his gaze away from the other slytherin. “ the fact is i can’t change what my father did to her. i wish i could but i can’t. i don’t have a time turner, theo. i am sorry for what happened to tracey, but taking your anger about it on me isn’t going to fix it. ”
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PERKS, SALLY-ANNE
The sight of Noah wasn’t unwelcome, it wasn’t, and Sally-Anne was doing everything she could to get used to him now that he and Stephen were an item once again. She made a promise back in November that she’d support Stephen and his decisions no matter what, which was far easier than the promise to back off Noah, but both were things to which she’d held herself. So she tried not to think about how terrible it had been to see Stephen so brokenhearted last year because of Noah, she pushed her judgments down and reminded herself that people could change, that Noah had changed. Stephen wouldn’t be giving him a second chance if he hadn’t. “No, no, stay,” Sally-Anne gestured in front of her. “I think Stephen scheduled a last-minute Quidditch practice. You’re not bothering me, though. Or anyone.” She felt weird — friendly conversation with Noah Runcorn was not something to which she was accustomed. “How are you?”
“ okay, thanks. ” noah stopped moving his things, but he was still tense, his shoulders straight and the corners of his mouth tugged down into a smile. he’d stay until given a reason not to, he figured. “ are you going to sit ? ” he tilted his head to the spot open next to him. he wouldn’t be offended if she sat down, maybe slightly annoyed, but he certainly wouldn’t be upset if she chose to sit anywhere else open at the table. “ he just — didn’t tell me about that, i guess. ” he glanced over to his own table, his frown growing. if he had to, he’d go over there. or leave. “ i’m fine, sally-anne. happy about quidditch being back. i need to go to the library later to finish a transfiguration essay. ” he forced a smile. “ what about you ? how were your holidays ? ”
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CORNFOOT, STEPHEN
stephen didn’t push back when noah asked him not to pay him such compliments - even though every instinct wanted to remind him of how good he truly was, or how everything that stephen said was accurate. there was a flare of anger as stephen started to think about just why noah wasn’t able to see those things in himself, or how he consistently had such a low sense of self-worth. stephen realized that even though he was able to see it - was able to see all the good things about him - it might take longer for noah to be able to see it himself. which was fine, as stephen could work to gently remind him over time, all while trying to protect him from those who wanted to claim otherwise.
“hey,” he said softly, reaching over and taking noah’s hand in his own, if only to try and stop him from further spiraling himself into worries. he laced their fingers together, gently squeezing. “if you’re not ready yet, it’s okay. you’ll get there. i mean - it’s a big jump, noah. no one’s expecting you to be able to throw caution to the wind and make this plunge without any hesitation.” stephen himself had had plenty of hesitations when it came to joining at the end of the previous school year - and he knew that he was lucky enough to not need to worry about painting a target on his back in doing so.
stephen knew that if noah did decide to join, he’d be severing ties completely with his family - and possibly what friends he had in slytherin. there’d be nothing left to avoid and hide. “i mean, it’s possible that there will be some people who will try to give you a hard time about it,” he responded, mentally flipping through the members of the group and who’d most likely be put off that there was a slytherin in the mix. “but i also think you made a pretty big statement when you made the decision to walk out of the halloween feast with the rest of us. people noticed, and i believe that it spoke volumes,” he pointed out.
he let out a sigh, knowing that as much as he could try to reassure noah that everything would work out in the way that it should’ve - it ultimately would be noah’s decision to make the jump. stephen was simply here to try and break the fall. “and remember - it’s not like you’re going to be there alone. i’ll be there with you the entire time. and if anyone has something to say, i’ll gladly tell them to go fuck themselves.” he let out a small laugh, smiling softly as he looked at noah. “i’m pretty sure that’s like, rule number one of being a good boyfriend, after all.”
there were more times than not that noah wished he could just take stephen’s hand and the two of them could just disappear. he never gave much thought to where they’d go or what they’d do, but if it were just the two of them together, without the threat of war looming, without the ghosts of his mistakes and his family haunting him, things would be so much better. he loved stephen, he did. some days that was the only thing he could be certain of. he squeezed stephen’s hand, too, comforted slightly.
he sat up, swinging his legs off of stephen and moving so they were now sat side-by-side. he let his head rest on his boyfriend’s shoulder. “ i’ve never been the sort to put so much thought into anything, ” he remarked glibly. “ maybe that’s what’s causing me pause. ” he let out a short but sharp exhale through his nose, a feeble laugh following. it wasn’t. they both knew that. “ i don’t — the longer it takes for me to do this, the longer people think i’m just death eater spawn too, you know ? i don’t want that either. ”
noah’s shoulders fell at that admission. maybe it was selfish to say that, that he cared about what and who people saw him as, but he knew that the rest of his reasons for wanting to join dumbledore’s army were solid and sound. he hated death eaters. he bristled seeing their pictures in the daily prophet, and his stomach turned with every mention of their atrocities. he didn’t agree with them. he hadn’t, not now and now ever, he thought. with this year, and even some of the most recent few past, he had become friends with those who weren’t pureblooded. the idea of losing them hit hard. he couldn’t think on that too long.
“ i had almost forgotten about that. ” he still remembered how he felt at the walk-out. there was a rush of emotions that day. fear, bravery, anxiety. it felt like forever ago. a part of him didn’t recognize the person he was then. he was still acting to piss off his parents, he was still trying to prove he wasn’t a monster to stephen. “ i didn’t regret it. ” at least, he didn’t after the night had passed, rest providing him the energy to quell the rush of regret he felt when it initially was over. “ i still don’t. ”
he let out a laugh and a smile finally pulled at his lips. he leaned over, pressing a kiss to stephen’s cheek before letting out a soft exhale. “ i don’t know what i’d do without you. ” this rang true, and noah found himself nodding to support his words. for as much as noah had to grow for himself, stephen was still an anchor in his life, keeping him rooted to something good and something strong. “ whatever rules you’re following to be a good boyfriend, ” noah couldn’t help but snort, “ keep following them. you’re doing a damn good job. ”
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BONES, SUSAN
RUNCORN, NOAH. when: january 21st, 1998; 03:30pm where: some hallway at hogwarts
@rvncorns
“we need a stronger pull with the slytherins, especially younger ones.” outside of context, susan’s words sounded more like those of a campaign manager for a politician, preaching for stronger voting appeal to a certain subset of society. it was easier (and practical, if you asked the girl) to approach the work of dumbledore’s army as a political endeavor, rather than a hail-mary militia, recruiting young soldiers for the danger of punishment or worse, and that was exactly what she did. more and more, DA meetings had susan bones moving at lightning speed in the background, taking energetic notes and pulling people away for quick individual chats, looking more like the manager than the soldier. talking with people about the rebellion against the carrows at hogwarts, even those outside of the DA, was no different at all. “look at the walk-out, it’s ridiculous. i haven’t done the maths yet, but i’m sure it was NOT 25 per cent, and we saw how that worked two years ago. you can’t organise actual change without a quarter of the school, or they’ll group up themselves.” her voice was low, fully aware of the dangers of speaking of such things out in the open, even if no one else was in that hallway. “you could reach to them better than i ever could.”
this was hard to listen to. noah wanted to be as optimistic and sure as susan, but the more she said, the more uncertain he grew. a pull with the slytherins ? besides tracey, he couldn’t come up with the name of a single person besides him who would even consider joining the da in the slightest. on the contrary, he knew more than a few who were going to follow in the footsteps of their parents, their lives destined and decided because of the blood in their veins. “ they won’t — it’s not going to be that easy. ” his arms were folded across his chest and he shifted his weight from foot to foot. he didn’t want to flat-out tell her no, that he couldn’t do what he was asking, but the word yes weighed like lead on his tongue.
joining the da was just step one. it had taken a lot from noah for him to finally join, and he wanted to be involved — susan’s ideas, though, they seemed like he would be diving straight into the deep end. it scared him more than he cared to admit. “ i get that, susan, i do, but the lot of them will be harder to convince than any of the other houses. ” he was trying to sound as diplomatic as she did. he was most certainly failing. “ it’s just — pardon my phrasing — they’re snakes. they’ll strike out at sudden change. they’ll strike out at weakness. they don’t want to make waves. ” it struck him suddenly — maybe more-so than any time before ( more than when he talked to tracey, more than his confrontation with theo ) — of the separation he had put up between himself and the rest of his house. “ half of them would hex me before i even got a word out, and i don’t think i could blame them. they’re loyal, nearly as much so as your lot of hufflepuffs. ” he lowered his voice. “ if they caught word of me even thinking of joining the da, i’d bet i’d be dead in my bed come morning. ” he wasn’t sure how much of an exaggeration that was.
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JONES, MEGAN
megan turned at the sound of her name, the small ( polite ) smile across her lips wiped away as soon as her eyes landed on the slim frame in the snake’s hand. shooting up from her place seated beside lily, megan all but leapt across the couch to snatch her picture back from the boys hands. ❛ what the hell is wrong with you? ❜ she shrieked, hugging the frame tightly to her chest so that the smiling faces of herself and morag didn’t have to witness such hysteria. ❛ this is a party, not a night to prove how much you can piss me off! ❜ glancing down at the bottle in his hands, she reached out and snatched that too. ❛ you don’t deserve this. ❜
noah regards her with widened eyes and he can’t help but flinch at her shriek. “ just — sorry, jones, sorry. it was a dare. ” there’s a moment of silence where he’s taken aback, but in an instant his demeanor switches, and he straightens up his shoulders and purses his lips. he raises his now-empty hands in a gesture of mock surrender, but his face twists quickly, mocking. “ i wanted to make sure you got it back. next time i’ll just let someone break it, i guess. will that be better for you ? ” his eyes pull away from her and glance around. he sees an unopened drink on a table and he reaches for it ( in his scan of the room, he notices morag, and a part of him thinks he should remember to apologize to her, too, for this ). he opens the bottle and raises it in a mock toast. he pulls a swig of it before asking, “ do i not deserve this one either ? ”
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ROPER, SOPHIE
Sophie stood there awkwardly while he read it - all of the words she could say seemed to be missing. How was she supposed to deal with this? There was the desire to comfort him, but Sophie didn’t know if it was her place to do something like that. When he spoke to her again, Sophie hesitated, glancing up and down the empty table before she took a careful seat next to him. Not right beside him, but enough to make the point that she wasn’t going to go anywhere. “I… I’m not going to tell anyone.” She told him quietly, feeling some sort of need to keep her voice hushed as though that would prove she wasn’t going to betray him. They weren’t friends, sure, and Sophie would only trust Noah as far as she could throw him. But she supposed he deserved a reason to trust her. “Stephen’s a really great guy.” She added, unsure of where she was really going with saying that. She bit her lip for a moment. “You can’t hurt him again, Noah.” She was far from accusatory - her voice still light and careful. “But… He’s a really good guy and… If he likes you, that’s gotta mean something about you.” Sophie tapped lightly on the table. “I’m sorry about your parents… You don’t deserve that.”
despite everything, despite knowing his parents were horrible, awful people, noah was still ashamed of himself. he still thought he was to blame for how his parents treated him. it didn’t matter that he saw how parents were supposed to love and treat their children in the cornfoots, it didn’t matter that he was trying to see himself as something more than how most people viewed him, as just another kid of a death eater destined to become nothing but the same.
he shot her a look, peeling his eyes from the note to look at sophie. “ okay, thanks. ” it was a weak response, the words hardly audible. he wasn’t sure if he believed her, but even the lie was slightly reassuring to hear. noah folded up the note ( there were only so many times he could read it over, and if he were alone, he’d still be obsessing ), creasing the edges of the parchment obsessively. “ it wasn’t anything new either. they’re just wasting parchment repeating themselves. ”
he felt defensive, but a part of him didn’t think there was any way to make it sound better. there was no excusing what his parents wrote, but maybe if he brushed it off as being said before, or as not being a big deal, it would take some of embarrassment he felt away.
the conversation turned, and noah narrowed his eyes at sophie. “ you don’t think i know that stephen’s great ? " the incredulity in his voice had an edge to it. “ he’s the only good thing i have. not anything else in my life is worth more to me than him. ” never had he said how he really felt towards stephen to anyone but the boy himself. but here was sophie, and here was noah, already vulnerable because of the damned letter. he couldn’t help the small smile at her last remark.
“ but you don’t know anything about what i deserve, sophie. ” he dropped the letter to the table. “ this doesn’t mean anything anyways. they’ve basically disowned me already anyways. this is just — it’s just salt in the wound, i guess. ”
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☺️
Send ☺ for my muse to do a body shot off yours.
noah thinks he doesn’t like body shots. they’re a little ridiculous in theory.but when he looks at stephen, he realizes that he might love body shots.
he’s not sure how much he’s had to drink, but it must be a lot considering he agreed to this. that’s how it was last time, too — a wide grin splitting his face, his head light and whirling with wispy thoughts. laughs bubbled up through his lips at the suggestion of it, and nothing had felt quite this good in ages, so he said yes. of course, it was tracey doing a body shot off of him the last time, and stephen could hardly stand a conversation with him then, and this night is definitely, definitely a thousand times better than that one for at least a thousand-and-one reasons.
stephen’s laying on the table and noah presses the shot into his hand and slips the lime wedge in his mouth before glancing down with a grin. “ this night keeps getting better and better. ” his breath is warm on stephen’s neck when he licks a long stripe. he sprinkles the salt carelessly. most of it missed and —
“ missed a spot. ” he leans back down, one hand on the side of stephen’s face as he presses messy kisses to the other side of his jaw. he doesn’t bother adding more salt before he licks what’s there off.
he tips back the shot quickly, and pulls the lime from stephen’s mouth. he winces slightly at the burn of the alcohol in his throat but he doesn’t hesitate in offering him a sloppy smile.
he can still taste the salt and lime on his mouth as he leans in to kiss stephen again.
“ is it your turn now ? ”
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♪
Send ♪ for my muse to dance with yours.
" i had to take dance lessons when i was younger, ” noah says, his face wrinkling with distaste. “ my parents would put me in dress robes and some stuffy witch would try and get my sister to waltz or — i don’t know. it was not my cup of tea. ” he shrugs his shoulders before letting an easy smile slide onto his mouth. he glances around at their classmates, drunk and dancing ( his parents would be appalled to know he considered their writing movements and loose limbs dancing ) and places his drink down. “ c’mon, morag, let’s dance because we can. ” he reaches out, grabbing her hand gently. “ we need to show them all the two best quidditch captains at hogwarts can do something besides fly a broomstick. ”
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☠
Send ☠ for our muses to do shots together.
noah stares at seamus, his gaze appraising. two shots lay in front of them on the table, empty glasses around them. “ you and lisa made this ? really ? ” he doesn’t mean to sound doubtful ( or at least, not as much as he did ) but he glances down at the alcohol and shrugs his shoulders. “ it’s not bad. ” he isn’t sure how much he’s had to drink, so maybe not bad is an understatement. “ glad you’ve found something you’re good at besides setting things on fire. ” that might be the closest seamus will get to getting a compliment from noah. he picks up one of the shots, tilting it towards the gryffindor. “ cheers. ”
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❝ (hannah!)
Send ❝ for my muse to drunkenly reveal something to yours.
he isn’t sure why he’s talking to hannah of all people, but he started talking and then he couldn’t stop. maybe it’s because she’s got a nice face. she just looks like the type of person you could share things with. “ someone asked me once what i was scared of and the easy answer was fucking some stupid response. i think i said something like ‘ losing a quidditch match ‘, but really at the time it was maybe my father, but that’s not something i’d say to anyone, so definitely no one ever really knew — ” he glances at her when he realizes the error in what he just said “ — but now, i think i’m most afraid of myself. ” he smiles slightly, his gaze fixing on the ground. “ i’m not — ” he struggles looking for the word — “ i’m not good, you know. no matter what anyone says, especially not stephen. i’m mean and i’ve hurt people, and all the penance in the world can’t make up for it. ” he takes a breath, then he takes a drink. “ i’m so scared of myself and maybe hurting someone. i don’t care if it’s just accidental. i don’t want to hurt anyone. ”
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❝
Send ❝ for my muse to drunkenly reveal something to yours.
for the longest time, every time noah looked towards tracey, he felt ill. guilt coiled in his stomach and the urge to apologize bubbled up in his throat. but they moved past that. and now, tonight, he looks at her and grins from his seat across from her. they won the game a few days prior — an emphasis on they, he would fiercely denounce the rest of his team to anyone who hinted that anyone besides him or tracey played well — and now they’re just able to have fun and enjoy themselves. that’s what they’re meant to do tonight. the party’s wound down by this point, he thinks, most people having left to go sleep in their own beds or finding a place to crash and call their own for the evening.
“ tracey, could i tell you something ? ”
he’s still smiling, though his heart is thudding loudly and he can feel the blood rushing through his ears. he shouldn’t be saying this aloud, he thinks, at least, a small rational part of him unaffected by the alcohol thinks. and so instead of blurting it out, he pauses. his eyes scan the room, and he makes a shh gesture with his hand before moving to sit on the arm of her chair. he’ll hint at it. tracey’s smart, he’s sure of it. she’ll figure it out. he leans in, his mouth close to her ear as he whispers. “ i did something, trace, and it’s either the best or most stupid choice i’ve ever made. ” coming from him, that’s saying something, and he laughs. for a second, he feels buoyant. “ or maybe it could be both, i don’t know. but at least, i’m doing something and not just twiddling my thumbs while the world goes to shit, you know ? ” he fixes his gaze on her. his voice grows softer, sad, and he wraps his arms around himself. “ i’m the only slytherin. ”
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WHEN: january 25th, 1998 WHERE: hufflepuff common room WHO: @megjcnes
“ jones, hey, jones — megan. ” noah calls her name as he is walking over to her. in one hand, he’s holding a bottle of something ( he’s not sure at this point. he was too drunk to be picky about what he was drinking ) and the other is tightly clasped around a picture frame. it’s hers. from her bedside table. if anyone shouldn’t have it, it’s probably him. he holds it out to her awkwardly. “ i thought you’d want this back. there was a dare, you know, and i’m sure people might get rowdy, and if you don’t want it to get broken, you might want to take it back upstairs. ” he’s rambling. “ but if you want me to just leave it, i could put it on a table in a corner somewhere, if you want. just — here. ” he all but presses it into her hands.
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⚡ + steal a treasured item from a hufflepuff of ur choice
“ oh, fuck you, parkinson. couldn’t have given me something harder to do ? ”
noah scoffs and rolls his eyes, a slight smirk tugging upwards at the corners of his mouth, and stands up from where he sits. this isn’t a challenge. for starters, he isn’t hurting anyone, and he doesn’t have to kiss or touch anyone who isn’t his boyfriend. easy. eyes in the circle follow him, nearly burning a hole in his back. he bets they’re wondering what he’ll come back with. he pushes through the door that leads to the girls’ room ( he had seriously considered going into the boy’s dorm, grabbing something of stephen’s and coming back out. the problem with that, he thinks, is that pansy would call it a cop-out, an easy completion of the dare. the second is that he didn’t want to hurt stephen, not in the slightest bit. )
noah looks around the room and a part of him feels uncomfortable at the idea going through someone’s belongings. still, he walks past the beds, glancing at them and the night tables beside them. a photograph catches his eye. he walks towards it, picking up the frame gingerly. the smiling faces of megan jones and morag macdougal stare back at him. probably not the wisest thing for him to take. he does so anyway.
he leaves as quickly as he came in, walking back into common room.
he tosses the photo onto pansy’s lap. “ there you go. ”
he lets her stare at it for a moment before grabbing it back. he’ll give it back to megan now instead of waiting until the morning.
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"Hey, hey, Noah. Hey. I didn't know you were here!" But Sophie seemed to be pleasantly surprised about the news, as she gave him a peck on the cheek like everyone else. She had the sense, at least, to lower her voice to a whisper. "M'sorry about your parents, Noah. You like... You really deserve better. You're a really sweet guy I think and... I don't want you to be sad. You don't deserve to be sad."
“ why wouldn’t i be here ? ” he asked, shooting her a sidewards glance. there was little doubting that as of late noah had been found more often with the hufflepuffs than his own house. if he were being specific, more often with stephen. still, it was only semantics, and it probably only mattered to noah. his brows drew together at her gesture of affection and he didn’t necessarily know how to respond to it. gentle touches and other shows of affection weren’t what he was used to. not with his close friends, not sue or millie — he didn’t dislike it but noah still couldn’t wrap his head around the slight kindness. he wasn’t given the chance to, not when she kept talking. his lips parted as if he were to say something, but he shook his head, his cheeks flushing. he lifted his bottle of firewhiskey to his mouth and took a long sip of it. he wasn’t sure if it was to distract himself from her words or to see if he could finish it before she stopped talking. “ you don’t know a thing about what i deserve. ” he didn’t either. “ and i’m not sad. not right now — at least, not if you don’t give me reasons to be sad. ” he shot her a hard look before shaking his head. her words had struck him and now his chest felt heavy. he turned his head ‘til his gaze landed on stephen, and his expression softened. “ i’m not sad because i’ve got stephen and we’re having fun. this is a good night, sophie — please just don’t remind me of things i’m trying to forget. ”
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☠
Send ☠ for our muses to do shots together.
“ coming through. ” noah moved through the crowd of people without much care, a shot in each hand, and he laughed when some of the alcohol spilt over the rim of the glass and onto his hand. it didn’t matter — nothing matter4r right then. at least, nothing but having fun and just enjoying the damned night. he was doing his best to do just that. “ fay, ” he stopped by gryffindor, holding out the second shot to her. “ here’s a free shot — and not one to my face this time. ” he raised his up slightly, a wobbly toast supported by a wobbly smile and a very wobbly noah. “ here’s to fight club and to not being the actual worst. ”
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