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“Species Dysphoria” (2021)

I’ve been waiting to post this one for a little while now! This comic was made for the Inky Paws Zine, a collaborative fiction zine created by nonhumans and alterhumans!

In hindsight, I should’ve probably leaned a little bit more into making this a fictional piece to better fit the zine’s theme…nevertheless, I’m still happy with it! This was something I created to try and articulate some of my personal feelings about my species dysphoria through the lens of someone who’s also trans, and maybe feels that those two identities are really the same.

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Leaves light on...

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Terrible phone doodle because when inspiration strikes you gotta do what you gotta do

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fun

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Some days it feels like this with mutuals

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Those 5 minutes is all they need from the player

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hospital

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The fact that animals that care for their young will sometimes adopt others' lost or orphaned young to raise along their own is just funny to me. I know that it's all hormonal and there's no conscious thought involved in it, but the internal logic of it is so funny.

"Baby = success. More baby = more success. I have one baby and I found four other baby. I have five baby. I am being so fucking successful right now."

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I am a brave and noble warrior trapped in the body of a miserable little wretch with popsicle stick bones and multiple health issues. Hitting you with my sword then going to sit down for a bit because I'm feeling lightheaded and my back hurts. My squire brings me a Powerade

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A couple weeks ago my HEMA instructor referred to inviting someone to attack you as a "pickup line" and the first thing that came to my mind was

"Hey baby," *performs a mediaeval longsword technique, killing you instantly*

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Once I had a fainting spell at HEMA and had to sit out, and my friends offered to go get me an energy drink from the gym vending machine, but I was embarrassed so I said I was ok. So then they ALL went and got energy drinks, and everyone took a break for a while. Bunch of knights sitting around drinking healing potions when only one of them really needs it. Chivalry isn't dead, just replenishing its electrolytes

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Pro tip from a person who just pulled this insane maneuver off: If you want a girl to like you, just ramble about swords until she kisses you. 60% of the time it works every time.

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in HEMA (aka historical european fencing), much of the sport is done with fencing masks on, so identifying your clubmates during sparring or tourneys is just based on gear. you know, what color their jacket and pants are, what patches they have on it, how is their mask painted. If someone borrows someone else's jacket it's legitimately jarring, like having someone with an entirely different body type and way of moving stealing your friend's face.

Once i read about historical fishermen in the north sea and how they each had a specific hat pattern that their buddies would use to identity them while they were bundled up. It was so much part of their identity that they were often buried wearing those hats. The gear is like your name, a visual identifier of YOU when you do not have a face.

anyway, back when I was buying gear i got my pants in ELECTRIC blue. I figured i was gonna get a black or grey jacket. but HEMA gear is kind of expensive because it's all custom- or handmade, so instead of spending $400 on a new jacket I picked up one secondhand for like 20. Except the only jacket that fit me was bright, SCARLET red. And I already had my expensive, new, custom, BLUE pants. I look like a damn rocket pop or like, a mixed Icee. I was like, shit! I should switch my jacket before i become the rocket pop guy!!!

Long story short, not only am I now the rocket pop guy, the color scheme has bled into my entire wardrobe. Every-fucking-thing I own is red and blue. I look like a french revolutionary. I look like a founding father in a school play. I have become a northern fisherman in my stripey hat. Now, even if I DO get a new jacket, I feel like I GOTTA buy it in red, yk? Otherwise they won't recognize me. Maybe I won't recognize me. I'm the rocket pop guy!!!