sahidchettair

[sahidchettair]

bashianofonte​:

―

          “It can be with the right motivation,” he mused carefully with a thoughtful pause when he considered the countless endeavors that he had taken on over the years. It was not always the right choice for him or anything more than a way to escape from the rest of his thoughts, by throwing himself into a new project ― but they were only ever meant to be temporary. A lasting home and time where he belonged did not exist. He had been painted into moments of the past, where he could see them hung up in galleries with no one remembering what had been there with him. Only him.

And the few that he met over the years that were still around as he glanced back at the other with a gentle smile. “You call me a model. Yet you have not seen any of my work. They are merely paintings of a time when I was far better at sitting still,” he teased with a light chuckle. “I have had my hand at traveling the world in search of a place to call home and while there, I have found that farming and ranching were better suited for someone other than myself.” Not to mention the times spent in various places in hopes to lose himself.

The right motivation, and enough money probably. Though motivation did a lot as well. Sahid had learned sign in a matter of months, solely because they felt like they had no choice. They still lacked vocabulary, but even if most people didn’t sign with them, they still learned new words daily. When they were without a job or stable income, they had been quick to learn mechanics and electronics, just to help out around the trailer park. Motivation was everything, but a little push of necessity was very important too. 

Sahid grinned in return. “Exactly, a model,” they said. “If you want to share though, I would be very interested in seeing your work.” They nodded. Farming and ranching didn’t sound like such interesting things, and Bash didn’t say they were, but he had tried them nonetheless. “But you did have a passion for it?” they asked. “Or you really wanted to try the quiet life?” 

[sahidchettair]

laurelgavaris​:

▬ 

“I was drunk but I still have a good memory,” she replied, a grin shared with them before she continued to make her path close to the establishment, the waves crashing more often than usual due to the wind, which also invited plenty of surfers to enjoy being out there. Something she couldn’t quite understand because, well, it was really cold and the idea of being in the water caused her skin to shiver. For a moment the ocean and everyone passing by had her attention, her eyes following their every move while her ears were still listening to the words Sahid were exchanging.

Then, her attention shifted back at them. Raising an eyebrow she questioned, “do you mean a sex on the beach?” It was the only one she reminded of that would fall into that category. “It’s been a long time since I got one of those drinks, I think I was still in Mexico when I tried it out,” she chuckled, perhaps one of the few memories that were kinder than the others. “I prefer mojitos or something with tequila. But, it’s not a bad drink… at all.” It was just sweeter than she was now used to. “Here we are! And how well are you adjusting to Astoria? Are you enjoying here so far?” She opened the door, motioning herself inside of the establishment only to head to the glass-covered deck that would give them the chance of enjoying the view without feeling the temperature the day outside was offering. 

“At least one of us has,” they said as final comment, watching her move towards the beach hut. She seemed aware of her surroundings, aware of them in a sense that the feel of the ocean pulled at her, pulled at her gaze, her motions. They could only watch, because for them it was easy to forget the world sometimes. They could lay in bed at night and think the whole world had ended, yet there was some sense of calm in the silence as well. Now there was just longing. Longing and an awareness that they really should’ve watched more movies with beaches. 

They nodded and rose one hand in agreement. “I was very much thinking in the rock department. Like, rocks on the beach, but yes, sex on the beach, never had that, and never had that drink either,” they said, a smile in jest. 

Sahid followed her in, glad for the lack of wind behind the heavy glasses, immediately aware of how much warmer it was inside. Their eyes fell back to her lips, shoulders almost falling back into a shrugging motion, but they managed to stop themselves just in time. “Yeah, I am,” they said, smiling still. “It’s been quiet recently, no strange... occurrences. I heard Leon and the others were found. Is he doing okay? Are you doing okay?” 

[sahidchettair]

issa-hassan​:

Status: Open @astoriastarter​

Where: Donut Hole

When: Sometime in the morning

Issa had been craving something sweet, so he went to one of the only places in Ashville he’d heard of so far, Donut Hole. Upon stepping inside the bakery, he was greeted by the sight of swarming crowds, all trying to get their hands on the delicious sweets. He noticed that some of the donuts on display where holiday themed, some with Santa, others with reindeer or snowflakes on them. Issa had known that since it’s morning it would be busy, but somehow the place seemed even busier than he expected.

When he finally gets his hands on one of the donuts, Issa tries to find a place to sit inside the bakery so he can eat it, to little avail. The people from when he was in line haven’t quite dissipated yet and he’s not one for crowds, so he steps outside in the cold air. Since it’s December, he’s thankful that he chose to wear a winter coat today, because he can stand and eat in his donut without being too cold. He takes a bite of his donut before he speaks, mostly to himself.

“So, I know that a lot of people celebrate Christmas, but I’ve never really understood the appeal. It seems like it’s mostly about capitalism and giving people things. Am I missing something?” 

Christmas was supposed to be one of the best times of the year. It had been, still, even through the past few years. But Christmas now seemed to be the worst time of the year. Because now it just meant another year without Cassie, another year where they didn’t have the possibility to end up feeding her ice cream despite Nadia’s protest, or watch one of her favorite Christmas movies. They would be staying in Astoria for now, less focussed on finding Cassie, more focussed on staying away. Nadia had send them a Christmas card, they had already send theirs way earlier, one that they felt like Cassie would like, should she return before Christmas. 

They held the envelop in their hand as they entered the place to get a donut and a coffee. It was the only place that offered three different lactose free donuts and a vegan brownie, so who were they to not try those at least once a week. 

The card still in hand, they walk back out, donut hanging over the steaming cup, warming up the inside. They notice movement to their left, and catch a few words as the stranger speaks. He’s handsome, which was enough to confuse them out of trying to understand the full sentence. “Sorry? Were you talking to me?” they asked, smiling, sincerely hoping he was. 

[sahidchettair]

shifter-samara​:

She hadn’t realized she’d stepped back, but Samara wasn’t exactly the ‘up-close and personal’ type – it seemed that hadn’t changed just because she was in another form. Why would it? But then the person spoke again, and Samara’s head tilted. Because he was actually posing questions she could answer — sort of. But both answers were sort of true. But not having an owner seemed like the more pressing point. Two barks. A strange feeling, really. 

That was odd. They cocked an eyebrow and wondered if they had heard that right. Okay, talking dogs weren’t such a far throw from Vampires right? Could be a Werewolf.... werehusky? “Alright. Are you a werewolf? One bark for no, two barks for yes.” That had to settle the score. Maybe. Though it could also be that the dog just enjoyed to bark twice. “Sit if yes, jump it no?”

[sahidchettair]

Maybe a date? || Tuah & Sahid

tuaharjuna​:

Tuah smiled apologetically. “You have a young face,” he reasoned. That and coupled with Sahid’s thin frame made them looked like they were no older than twenty by his estimation. “Do you not like being told that you look younger?” He arched his brows, “most people seem to like it when they’re told that they look younger. Makes them friendlier, even.” Tuah moved his shoulders in a shrug. He supposed Sahid didn’t take it as a compliment as some might, which made Tuah guess that they didn’t care much about their appearance. “That’s quite an accomplishment,” he commented, “very responsible too. It must’ve taken a lot from you to get everyone ready.” Tuah smiled at the image. “Did they protest whenever you try to make them attend the church?”

He scoffed. “Then you might have to wait for the rest of your life.” Tuah nudged Sahid’s side gently with his elbow, chuckling as he shook his head. “Someone once told me that I have a personality as bland as the colour beige. And if that didn’t allude you to how boring I am, I don’t know what is.” Of course, he didn’t agree with the statement, but it worked in this context. Perhaps people would be interested in his based on his looks, since he did take care of his appearance, but he was sure they would lose interest after five minutes talking to him. Or was that the point of the application, he wondered. Tuah narrowed his eyes and arched his brow at the off-hand comment, his lips curled into a half smile. “Ah, so your mother set you up with the nicest boys and girls in Wheeler, then?” He asked, a teasing lilt in his voice.

He nodded in understanding. “Talking about the things that hurt you is never easy.” He should know, since he had always avoided talking about his past with his sire. Centuries had passed and it was still a sore subject for him. Tuah could only imagine what it would be like for Sahid. “Talking about it may help ease the pain, however. You don’t have to talk to me about it if you don’t want to. But, perhaps with someone that you trust? Or with a professional?” Of course, he was willing to listen to them if Sahid wanted him to, but he’d still wanted them to realise that there were other options too for them to heal themselves, both physically and mentally.

Tuah tilted his head a little to the side, humming as he mulled Sahid’s question. “There’s nothing specific, but I do try to celebrate every festivity whenever I can. I fast during Ramadhan and celebrate Eid al-Fitr in the month of Syawal in respect of Islamic beliefs, and celebrate Christmas in respect of Christianity, for example.” There were other observation or celebration that he had participated, but those three were the ones he participated the most. They were both Abrahamic religions, and the ones that he was most familiar with. “If you’re talking about tradition, however, that’s a different story. I still follow old Malay traditions wherever I go. Some of them are a little outdated, but I always find myself reverting to my old ways.” Perhaps it was his way to reconnect to his past before everything spiralled uncontrollably out of his hands.

He nodded in understanding. It wasn’t the first time he heard someone trying to reconnect with their past through religion, through culture. From Sahid’s story, Tuah guessed that Sahid felt robbed of their own identity when their mother refused to talk about their past, so they were trying to find a way to reconnect with it again. To find their roots in their father’s religion, so to speak. “Do you start performing puja at home too? In Astoria, I mean.”

He nodded. “To your three months in Astoria, and to many more to come,” he raised his hand pretending to give a toast, before letting it fall to his thigh with a light slap. Tuah arched his brows, his lips painted a half smile when Sahid offered to celebrate his birthday. “A private birthday party with just the two of us?” he entertained the idea with a hum. It wasn’t what Sahid was offering, merely his own assumption of what the party would be. “So, it’ll be not so much of a party but, a hang out, yes? That doesn’t sound too bad.” He never liked being in a crowd, anyway, especially when he was the centre of the attention. “We can do that too for your birthday. Go around town to do anything you want to do. Just the two of us.”

Sahid shrugged with a grin. “When you’re young you want to be older, I guess,” they said. Older meant being able to live on your own, older meant making your own decisions. Sahid had only ever wanted to be older. “I feel like it is close to saying I look like a kid, I guess,” they said, but there was still a smile on their face. They wondered what made them look younger, they could sort of guess, they didn’t have a very bulky appearance, not at all.

“Not a whole lot, they were meek little sleep after too much booze. It was just the ‘presentable’ part that left a lot to be desired. You can dress up a cat in a suit, but it will still be a cat. You can dress up five hungover friends in suits, but they’ll still be hungover,” Sahid told with a smile. It was the one time in their life that they had felt most in control. 

They shook their head. “I didn’t make them, technically I saved them, because if they didn’t show up, society would’ve judged them harshly,” they said with a wink. Sahid scoffed in return, although they weren’t sure if Tuah had scoffed, but they had figured from the movement. “Just my life? Worth it if I get to say it,” they noted, cocking an eyebrow. “Who was that and who hurt them?” Sahid said, eyebrows knitted together, so far to them Tuah was the opposite of being as bland as the color beige. They’d had decent conversations so far and he seemed to have a lot to share that was all very much new information to Sahid. Also he was a Vampire, which had to count for something. There must be stories to tell if you lived over three centuries. And that really wasn’t the point of Grindr was it? Tuah would get the attention just for his looks. Sahid shrugged, surprised to hear Tuah say ‘boys and girls’ when it came to their mother. There hadn’t been many situations where they had been matched with some girl from town, but there had been instances where they received a pointed jab whenever they spent a little too long watching the boys play soccer without shirts on. For a moment Sahid wasn’t sure if they should make a comment on that. Because they wondered how it would sound. “Just the girls,’ they said, the words falling from their tongue, sounding defensive. Years of ignoring their own wishes trained into the simple act. Boys, no sir, men shouldn’t love other men. They awkwardly looked away, not sure how to be themselves. 

Sahid really couldn’t shake the feeling, the idea of talking about it was scary, but not for the reasons of what had happened. It wasn’t that the consequences made them recoil, having become deaf was something that had just happened. The fact that their Stepfather had been so intent on believing his own lie to hurt them, that was what really bothered them. But they feared admitting to it, because of all the feelings it might unearth along with it. They took a sharp breath. “Yeah, maybe,” they said, the smallest twitch in the corner of their mouth. They didn’t want to talk about it, they didn’t want to make it real. They hadn’t cried in pain since the day they got stuck in the trampoline. They feared if they ever would cry again, they might never stop. 

They nodded along, finding themselves interested in hearing about it, finding some part of them resonate with the idea of celebrating religious beliefs as a sign of respect. They nodded at the traditions however, reverting back to old ways was something they found themselves doing as well. They gave them comfort. “Do you turn to certain religions for specific aspects?” they asked. “Do you believe in a life after death?” 

Sahid shook their head at the question. They had left most of their belongings in Astoria, which included the things they had collected for their little altar. They missed the tradition in their daily life however, the simple moment of recollection, of calmth, of setting their life in order. “I want to, I just haven’t found the time in day yet to actually… practice.” That was a lie, they just turned to a bottle of alcohol more often than they did to practice. 

There was a smile on their lips, but it didn’t last too long. They scratched the back of their head. “I’m- inclined to agree with you, but I hope not too many more. When Cassie is found I plan on returning home,” they said. They felt odd for admitting it, because they weren’t sure what would happen to them if they returned, but they wouldn’t leave Cassie. 

Sahid had to remind themselves that Tuah had shown no interest whatsoever in anything other than platonic friendship. Their heart was beating in their throat however at the suggestion of a private party, and they nodded mostly because most of their attention went into forcing a blush from appearing on their face. “Yeah sure,” they said, pretending to rub something out of their eyes to obscure the view of the darker shade on their cheeks.

[sahidchettair]

laurelgavaris​:

▬

“You’re an angel, I hope you know that,” Laurel didn’t mind being outside, it was a gift Sahid gave to her to let go of most of her worries during that particular month, when days seemed shorter than she needed them to be. Twenty-four hours weren’t enough, it didn’t seem like enough. But still, she had to take care of her health, make sure she’d be well enough for her presentation and every practice she had yet to go through. Laurel also knew that the lack of free time also caused some weight loss, which was mostly visible to herself instead of others. “And yes, we can have all of that.”

She finally started walking close to one of the establishments, one that didn’t seem too crowded and gave them a beautiful view of the beach in front of it. Her eyes even landed at one of the tables, choosing it prior to passing by the door, but still aiming with every step to get there. “And don’t think I forgot because I didn’t, I owe you a drink since you paid for mine at the club, so… just let me know what you want and I’ll get that for you. Consider this us practicing before travelling abroad together.”

Sahid just offered their own grin, not wanting to change much about the situation, glad just for the company. It had been years since Sahid had anyone they could call a friend - aside from Cassie, and maybe Brandon and Nadia. They had never counted on their friends for much. They had counted on them a lot however, to get them places, to make sure they looked presentable. But that was as far as their friendship had gone. None of them - except maybe Jimmy - had been certain of Sahid’s attraction to men. Yet here they were, getting drinks with someone who they didn’t know, yet who they felt far more comfortable with than with any of their former friends. 

They followed her along the beach, mostly paying attention to her, but sometimes taking a quick look at the ocean, as if to convince themselves that it was still there. “Really? I forgot all about that,” they admitted, but smiled nonetheless. They bought way too many drinks for other people, sometimes finding even that being rejected on account of the other person ‘not being gay’, which at least was an answer they could work with. “I know there is a cocktail that has beach in the name, but I can’t remember what it was. Something on the beach. Just, the first thing you see that has beach in the name, I want that,” Sahid told her, grinning.

[sahidchettair]

Maybe a date? || Tuah & Sahid

tuaharjuna​:

“That’s plenty enough. People don’t expect you to know everything that’s going on in the world, though I suppose it’s different now with the world wide web. Everything’s on your fingertips.” Tuah moved his shoulders in a shrug. Technological advances did have their advantages, but like everything else it did have its downsides. Sahid didn’t need him to tell them that, since the younger generations were more familiar with it than he was. “Would you like a list” Tuah teased, laughing quietly. He hummed, tilting his head slightly to the side as he pursed his lips as he considered Sahid’s question. “I’ve only mastered two languages: Malay and English. I can understand basic Arabic and Spanish, but I can’t speak it well. I learnt how to fix my car and motorbikes myself, only because it doesn’t have all that smart technologies that cars these days have. And I mastered all ballroom dances because my grandsire forced me to.” Tuah’s grimaced at the last sentence, having unpleasant memories resurfacing again. He avoided talking about the more violence side of his mastery for obvious reasons, turning his attention to Sahid. “What about you? Anything you’ve mastered in your,” he paused, eyes narrowing a little, “eighteen years of life? Twenty?” He couldn’t guess how old Sahid was, looking too young to be in their 20s but too old to still be in their teens. So, late teens perhaps?

Tuah laughed at the idea of him being a celebrity on the application, shaking his head slightly. “I appreciate the vote of confidence, but I don’t think I’ll be that popular,” he said, shaking his head again, “And I don’t have a hoard of people flocking to me. If that’s true, I’d change my name to Erotus or something similar.” He wasn’t the most astute when it comes to other’s flirtation towards him, though he figured he didn’t need to worry about that since not many ever did. People were friendly to him, sometimes a little too friendly than he was comfortable with, but that was it. “Have you tried using that application before? Or any similar application?”

There were more questions that he’d like to ask. What happened was at the top of his list, then when did that happened. Tuah didn’t push further, however, noting the shift in Sahid’s behaviour from his prodding. He didn’t want to cause them anymore discomfort than he already had, so he dropped the subject for now. Talking about one’s trauma was never easy, especially when one was constantly reminded what they had lost because of it. “I’m sorry for bringing it up. It must’ve been unpleasant for you to remember the incident.” He reached out and squeezed Sahid’s shoulder, hoping to comfort them without trespassing their boundary.

“That’s a difficult question,” Tuah remarked, pulling his hand and resting his head on it while his arm resting on the back of the bench. “I believe that there is a higher being that pulled the string of fate and watches over us, and I believe that all religions contain truths, but that no one religion offers all that is truth. It is why I use the term ‘the Gods’ rather than ‘a God’ when referring to the higher power.” Tuah raked his fingers through his hair when the cold salty breeze messed covered part of his face. “Technically, my belief isn’t considered a theology. Not in a traditional sense, anyway, since it neither espouses nor opposes particular beliefs about God.”

Tuah’s brows furrowed deeply, lips pressed into a thin line as he listened to Sahid. “Do you still follow the two beliefs, or just one now?” he asked after a moment. If their parents were as devout as Sahid had mentioned, then he understood why they were adamant for them to choose Christianity than letting them follow two religion. “What made you want to follow those two religions, by the way? They aren’t exactly similar to one another, from what I understand.”

His shoulders sagged a little when he learnt that Sahid’s birthday had passed, though he did take out his phone to make a note so he wouldn’t forget. “Then we’ll just have to pick a date to celebrate something else for now. Perhaps to celebrate your two months being here?” Tuah pocketed his phone and smiled at Sahid. It took him awhile to before he could answer them, however. “March 20th, though I don’t really celebrate my birthday. Sometimes I forget the date of my own birthday.” Tuah shrugged. He much preferred celebrating other people’s birthday than his own, anyway.

They nodded, not really remembering a time before the internet, yet also not really having used it to its full potential unless if they were in the library, or on their phone. Things at home were much more… difficult. Privacy wasn’t something that was a given. And for what it was worth they were always careful enough to avoid the whole “porno on the computer” situation, if only for Theo’s many attempts and many failures. Nobody in Wheeler was a computer genius, at least not the people they hung out with. 

Sahid grinned and shrugged, smiling at the list, perhaps they wouldn’t mind a list, and Tuah didn’t seem to mind giving them one. Sharing one by one the many skills he had picked up on, the languages, though only two, the dancing and fixing. They wondered if that was all, but they figured there might be more, just not things he would consider skills, or mastery. They were a little surprised to have the question thrown back at them. They hadn’t figured a way to answer it, when a laugh rose from their throat. “Eighteen??” they scoffed. “Do I look that young? Twenty-six,” they said. “And I don’t know whether to take your guess as a compliment or not,” they added, shaking their head a moment. “The only thing I mastered was getting all of my friends in church on time on Sunday morning, presentable, after a night of drinking and smoking weed.” 

Sahid cocked an eyebrow at the wod that was unfamiliar to them, but they didn’t ask what it might mean. Instead they shook their head as soon as Tuah was done talking. “Hmm, I think you may be wrong,” they said in return, smirk still there. “But I won’t fight you over it, I’ll wait for the day when I can say ‘I told you so’,” they offered. Grindr would probably not leave their conversation any time soon, and they wondered for a moment if that meant - since Grindr was mostly for men - if the other thought they were into men. Tinder was more… casual in that regard, didn’t make too many distinctions. But they hadn’t used either. “I had my mom,” they said, meant as a joke. “Didn’t need any apps.” 

A knot settled in their stomach at Tuah’s word, wishing they could talk about it, that it didn’t bring up such memories, that it didn’t render them motionless. They nodded, Sahid was glad that their body language was enough to get Tuah to stop asking about it. They were glad because they hadn’t told a soul about what Phil had done to them, and they wouldn’t be surprised if he hadn’t told anyone either. Maybe their mother. Maybe everyone knew, nobody just… had to have been told. And they didn’t want to talk about it. Talking about it made it real, talking about it probably made other people ask why they hadn’t gone to the police. And bringing that up meant… other memories. “It’s okay, I don’t like talking about it, that is all.” 

The conversation moved to religion, and Sahid couldn’t pretend they weren’t giddy at that. They had gotten used to talking about religion as if there was only one. Only one God, one truth, one reality, but that had never been something they believed in. they weren’t sure where that belief had started, or if it had been in them since the very beginning, but they felt eager to discuss it because it wasn’t cut and dry. Even within Christianity people believed different things. And they found their own thoughts voiced back to them - though much better worded. They nodded along, hoping their nodding would spur Tuah into talking further. “Do you… follow certain traditions?” they asked. “Or festivals or something?”

“I-” they rolled their shoulders, their heart hurt at the thought. Even now, even after everything that had happened, Sahid still didn’t think they had made a wrong choice. If they could go back, they would do it all over again, no matter the consequences. “I don’t… follow either in a sense, but I believe in both,” they said. “Reason why you met me at the church. I haven’t prayed to god or performed Puja since Cassie disappeared.” But the conversation was still on religion, and as much as it was the reason for their stepfather throwing them out of the house and making them into a pariah, it wasn’t because of religion. Or they didn’t want it to be. “My real father died when I was four, he and my mother followed Hinduism then. But she remarried after his death, and she never talked about him. I didn’t have anything of his either, so I hoped it would bring me closer,” they said. Realising that they had never said those words out loud before.

“That also passed,” Sahid said with a laugh. “Three months then?” they asked, though the more time passed, the more worried they grew about if anyone still expected them to return. “I don’t either. At least… I never liked celebrating it much.” There always were a lot of expectations around it, nobody seemed to be much worried about making them feel comfortable for a day. And growing up without Cassie was weird. “Now I won’t, so I guess next year you’ll have to deal with a party then,” they offered with a grin.

[sahidchettair]

laurelgavaris​:

▬

“A quick tour indeed,” she was thankful that they were appreciative of her really awful joke, and the fact they followed along her words, caused a brief smile to be shaped over her lips while her eyes would look around. Despite the cold temperature, it was still a beautiful scenario, one that she could be easily mesmerized by, if it wasn’t for the fact that she had company that particular day.

Raising an eyebrow, she pondered. The idea of being indoors instead of feeling the cold wind against her tiny figure was actually a cozy point of view, still, she had to ask. “Are you sure? I’ll feel kind of bad if we end up staying inside an establishment instead of being out here. I won’t complain, because it’s freezing, but I’m okay with whatever you choose,” she was in a better mood than the last time they had seen each other; so offering her company was something she’d gladly do.

Sahid didn’t like how quickly the view of something became common. They had never seen the ocean in person until boarding a plane to Astoria, they had never felt the salt water until after two months there, they stepped onto the sand for the first time. And now several weeks later, they looked at the ocean and wished they could go back to that first feeling, to look upon the ocean again and think: shoot, that’s big. But all they did now was feel eager about wishing they could hear it. Hearing was such a big part of someone’s experience, and they would never have that. 

“No, I am good with just sitting near the beach, it feels like a beach experience of its own. Also cocktails, huge part of the beach experience, we can pretend it’s warmer,” they offered, not showing for a moment that they did want to go for a walk along the beach, they just didn’t want to end up having to explain for missing certain things in their conversation. They figured they could get away with this. “And it is freezing.”

[sahidchettair]

Maybe a date? || Tuah & Sahid

tuaharjuna​:

Tuah had expected Sahid to bombard him with questions, or at least had one question that they’d like an answer to. So when Sahid didn’t ask him anything, neither about his past or about his sexuality, well. To say that he was a little disappointed was an understatement, but Tuah merely nodded and didn’t push further. “Alright. You know how to reach me.” He had extended his hand to Sahid as far as he could, and it was up to them to accept it or not. They had only met twice, after all, so it stood with reasons that Sahid wouldn’t trust him to answer their questions, despite the instant connection that he felt whenever he talked to them. Perhaps if they had known each other better, longer perhaps, Sahid would eventually open up to him. Or at least Tuah hoped that would be the outcome.

He smiled when Sahid seemed to relax a little. “I hardly think that someone who’s able to remember a hundred years’ worth of history are shit at history, as you called yourself. Some people don’t even remember what happened yesterday, let alone something from a hundred years ago.” It was perhaps an exaggeration on his part, but the meaning behind it was true, nonetheless. Tuah arched his brows, his lips curled into a smirk. “That depends on the kind of experience that you’re asking,” he told them, taking the last drag of his cigarette before putting it out in his portable ashtray. “So, what sort of ‘wisdom’ are you looking for from me, hm?” He asked, a slight teasing lilt in his voice.

Tuah snorted. “I wouldn’t even know how,” he pointed out, shaking his head. “As I’ve said, I’m really bad with recent technology. Aside from the few important application on my phone, I don’t have much else. I don’t even have a social media account.” Someone had taught him how to set up his account before, but he soon gave up on the idea and deleted the application from his phone. Aside from the email account for work, he really didn’t need anything else.

His eyes followed Sahid’s movement to the hearing aid on their ear before turning his attention on their face. “Did you gradually lose it?” he asked, wondering if his theory was true. Tuah wondered if there was a way to restore Sahid’s hearing; if there was any possibility to restore their hearing at all. He made a mental note to look into it later.

“I have in the past,” Tuah admitted with a semblance of a smile, “I felt lost and angry and helpless, and I needed to blame someone for the things that happened to me. So, I blamed the Gods and turned my back on them.” A soft sigh escaped his lips. “It took me a long time to find my way back to the Gods, to stop blaming them for what happened in the past.” As much as he had blamed the Gods for making him go through the things that he had, there was no one that he blamed more than himself. He still believed in his sire’s words, deep down, having them drilled into his head for the first century of his unliving.

The conversation then turned towards Sahid and their parents, and it made Tuah furrowed his brows in confusion. If Sahid’s parents were devout believers of Christianity, they had no reason to fall out with their child, since Sahid believed in the same faith as well. “did you lose your faith a while back?” If that was the case, then surely they would forgive Sahid since they’ve started finding their way to their faith.

Tuah wasn’t really sure if the drinks served at those places were expensive as Sahid mentioned, so he refrained from commenting further. “perhaps we can go there to celebrate an occasion, hm. Like your birthday for example.” He thought that would give Sahid enough excuse to visit his friends’ places, and an excuse to allow Tuah to buy them a drink. “When is your birthday, by the way?”

While the hand surprised them and confused them, Sahid didn’t take more than half a second before reaching for it and shaking his hand. They were very used to shaking hands, the church on Sunday had been filled with it, and Sahid was always quick to offer their own firm handshake, not too firm, just enough to show their own spirit and strength. But most of all, in this case, to ensure the promise was made. Even if they still didn’t know what to ask. Probably never would, unless they got the courage they needed. 

“Solely the history of the United States though. Oh, and the World Wars, and cold war of course, but that’s about it.” They melted under the smirk, but quickly caught themselves again because the conversation continued and Sahid was intent on waiting to watch the other’s face, much too aware of it too. They scoffed. “Experience like… I don’t know, have you mastered any languages, or skills or something? If you’re three centuries old, I can’t imagine you not having mastered something,” they opted.

Sahid snickered and shook their head. “You aren’t missing anything. And I meant that I can’t imagine you needing it. Because you must have hoards of people flocking to you,” they added, nervously hiding their face behind the cup again. They for one had flocked easily, they couldn’t imagine others not doing so, those damned curls. “Grindr would probably make you some kind of celebrity.”

They didn’t like talking about their deafness, but it was their fault that the subject had come up, so they would have to answer for something. “No,” they said. “There was an incident, I lost it in one go,” they shared, really hoping Tuah would be satisfied with that answer. The image had never been pretty and still made them freak out.

Sahid didn’t judge, as much as some part of them might one to. Some part that had been raised by a man whose love for god meant more than his love for his family. They didn’t understand it, but they accepted that some needed higher powers to be blamed. What struck them however was how Tuah used gods as plural. “Gods?” They asked eventually. “What religion did you follow?” There were a lot out there. Christianity - or Baptism in their case - was cut and dry clear to them, Hinduism was still very much a mystery but they still fell to it. Religion to them was interesting, vast, a part of reality that was different to everyone, which was why they took to it so easily. It gave sense to the world.

Sahid swallowed, wishing the conversation had never gone this direction. Yet at the same time some part of them wanted to talk, and was eager to share. They found themselves craving to share what was otherwise left between themselves and their parents. “I followed two religions,” they said. “Baptism and Hinduism. They wanted me to choose. To choose theirs.” This much they found they could say without shutting down. They knew however that talking about what had followed and what had come before would be much more difficult.

They cocked an eyebrow at the very obvious way to find out their birthday, an odd moment because so far Sahid had felt at the mercy of Tuah. They had been awkward and held back because the balance between the two of them was in Tuah’s favor. They grinned as it balanced a bit back again. “Uhuh,” they said, grin still there. “Not for a long time, sadly. September 27th. Yours? It doesn’t have to be a birthday.”

[sahidchettair]

laurelgavaris​:

▬

Despite not having plenty of free time the past few weeks, Laurel was unable to decline Sahid’s idea of heading to the beach, she could use a couple of minutes or even a few hours to relax and be able to enjoy the day out. That was the main reason why texting a ‘yes’ and a time for them to meet had been easy for the head priestess, before she found something to wear and grabbed her purse to leave.

A quick drive led her to where she should meet them, and all she offered Sahid the moment her gaze found them, was a smile. “Hey! I mean– you gave me one of the easiest tasks to go through. Here’s the sand” she pointed to where they were standing, “and there you can see the sea,” Laurel joked, her humor being remotely better now that the full moon had passed by and, for the first time, her coven had been safe. Despite the cold weather, there were plenty of people enjoying their day out, and it would help whenever the wind could try yo make her shiver even if she had a jacket covering her upper body.

“Would you like to take a walk or should we enjoy the view for awhile?” It was safer to ask, because they were the one who invited her, so she was up to whatever they wanted to do with their time that particular day.  

Seeing Laurel again, for the third time now, Sahid was once again reminded of her beauty. They figured she might have hordes of friends, all who wished for her attention and company, wanting to be near to her because she radiated not only beauty but warmth and kindness as well. And she seemed to have an interesting type of humor. “So it is, guess that concludes our tour then, see you at the club?” Sahid asked smugly. Her joke reminded them of Franks.

Noticing the shiver, and being able to read the question of her lips, they figured walking was the best idea. The only problem with walking was that they would not be able to keep their eyes on her lips. They also weren’t sure if they had the guts to explain to her that they were deaf. So they shrugged. “I’ve seen a few beach houses that sell cocktails and have outside heating? Not really the weather for a walk, unless if I want to freeze.”

[sahidchettair]

Location: Astoria’s Beach @laurelgavaris​

Albeit their main goal in Astoria was finding any word on Cassie, and their secondary goal was flirting with as many men as possible, Sahid felt like they could make time in their busy schedule to not be dealing with either of those, and instead talk with people who after one conversations didn’t give them the feeling like they were making a giant mistake. Somehow messaging Laurel had taken way more courage than walking up to a random person in a club. 

But once the question was out there, and the response was favorable, Sahid’s nerves had settled. They figured if anyone could show them around the beach, it would be her. Also at current - not counting all the men they had flirted with over the course of the last few months - Laurel was the only one who knew about their preference - aka Michael B Jordan. It was nice to have that, and to not be afraid of the consequences. 

They looked up with a smile when Laurel appeared, having scanned the crowd like crazy, knowing they still held up the facade of being not-deaf. Which was going to be a problem at some point, but they were still uncomfortable about it all. “Hey! Thank you for wanting to be my beach guide.”

[sahidchettair]

Suraj Sharma as Rakesh in God Friended Me

[sahidchettair]

shifter-samara​:

As soon as the other husky disappeared from sight, Samara let out a huff – though she wasn’t quite capable of making that sound, it coming out more like a chuff. She wasn’t exactly sure what she was supposed to do now – even if she went home, it wasn’t like she could unlock her front door or anything of the sort. When Samara heard the voice, eyes flicked up to the person standing there, blinking a few times. A step beck when they crouched down to talk to her, asking if she was lost. Samara debated what to do for a moment, faking the role of an actual dog, or trying to communicate that she was anything but. Finally, she attempted to shake her head, not sure if the other would understand or not. 

Sahid continued to smile at the dog. Of course it didn’t understand them, it was a dog, but they did like to think it had shaken its head in reply. “Is that a no to the owner or to the lost part?” They asked, not expecting an answer. But since the dog had taken a step back, Sahid didn’t get much closer, just kept in their place thinking that the dog would come close to them if the dog felt comfortable enough. “Bark once for not being lost, and bark twice for not having an owner,” they suggested to the dog. 

[sahidchettair]

mateo-tellezmarin​:

―

“Ten minutes?” Mateo asked, quickly picking up on the joke. “Honestly, I wouldn’t have put it past me. If that was the case I’d have to buy your a coffee to make up for it. On the house, made by yours truly,” he said kindly, not quite putting Sahid’s words and intent together as was his usual nature. Despite being incredibly intelligent, he often missed out on things of the romantic nature. 

Mateo reached for his own coffee in front of him in a vain attempt to keep him alert, a humoured laugh bubbling to his lips at the young man’s observation. “I get that a lot actually.” There had been several occasions when someone had asked if he was a triplet or a twin, something his mother got goosebumps every time it was mentioned, “I promise I’m not that, so you can hold off on the restraining order. It was…Sahid, right?” 

“Suggest that and you might have me trying to get that free coffee next time,” they offered with a grin. “I am very good at standing completely still.” Were they though? Sahid had grown used to being on their own, so they figured they could pretty much spend time in their own company for days, if drinks were involved however. Also clearly their intentions didn’t come through because Mateo didn’t react as Sahid had hoped he would. Perhaps Sahid wasn’t their type? They wondered. 

They laughed. “Noted, I’ll get rid of the paperwork,” they joked in return. They nodded. “Yes, Sahid,” they said, surprised the other remembered their name, mostly happy that he did. Perhaps it meant something, maybe it didn’t mean anything. “You’re Mateo, but I know that because of the name tag, very helpful,” they added, grinning.

[sahidchettair]

Maybe a date? || Tuah & Sahid

tuaharjuna​:

Tuah watched Sahid quietly. Perhaps he had misread Sahid’s intention in their questions about his past. The way they seemed to retreat within themselves made him regret for doubting Sahid, for thinking that they had any ill intention when they were perhaps simply curious. “You know,” he said as gently as he could, lips curled into a soft smile, “if you have questions you want to ask, I don’t mind answering them. Though I must pre phase that I can only answer based on my own experience.” He hoped it was invitation enough for Sahid to be open with him, or at least to let them know that he was willing to help them with whatever they were going through. Even if he didn’t have all the answer to their question, he’d promised that he would help them find the answer together. They were young, so of course there would be questions that only experience could answer, and he hoped he could guide them as best as he could.

He watched as Sahid’s smile faltered at the revelation, imagining the wheel in their mind turning as they tried to make the little connection they had with his statement. Tuah offered his smile in return at the question, nodding as he took a drag from his cigarette. “Hardly believe it myself, either. Don’t ask me about which history is accurate and which is an exaggeration, though. I was too busy living my life than paying attention to what happened around the world.” It was framed as if he enjoyed living as long as he did, though he didn’t think it was inappropriate to do so. He wanted his secrets to stay buried with him for as long as he lived. No one had to know his past to know who he was now, after all.

Tuah furrowed his brows, trying to understand what was being said. Realisation slowly dawning on him as he watched Sahid awkwardly trying to explain the application to him. “Oh, OH.” He turned away from Sahid, grateful for his dark complexion that hid the flush on his cheeks. He took a long drag of his cigarette, the burnt nicotine in amber before turning to ash as he did so. How could he not connect the dots himself was beyond him, though he reasoned he needed to be familiar enough with recent dating applications to differentiate between them. He turned towards Sahid as they spoke once more. “Oh,” was all he could say, then added, “I see. I – I don’t either. Obviously.” He laughed awkwardly, running his fingers through his hair.

He huffed a chuckle, his cheeks still hurt from laughing that he had to massage them gently. He let his hand fall as he nodded his head. “Ah, it’s no wonder that song sounded familiar.” He tried to recall if there was subtitle provided when the show was aired, though he couldn’t recall. “How did you learn the song, by the way?” he finally gave in to his curiosity, wondering if Sahid was only partially deaf when they were a child before it grew worse over time. Tuah smiled softly at their remark, his heart warmed by their words. “Not everyone is as understanding as you,” he told them, “people are always quick to blame anything and anyone other than themselves when something didn’t go their way. I know I have done so a couple of times.” More so than he could admit, more than he could count. Tuah furrowed his brows as he mulled Sahid’s words further. “Why did you say that, Sahid? ‘It’s not His fault that my parents are the way they are’. Did… something happened?”

Sahid’s laughter was lovely to hear, and Tuah realised that he had never heard them laugh before. Granted, they had only met twice now. So he was determined to have them laugh whenever he could. “They sound like a riot,” he commented, glad that at least Sahid was enjoying their roommates’ company. He wanted to tell Sahid that he had been learning how to sign too, but he wanted to find a suitable time to surprise them. Perhaps during Christmas or their birthday, though he had to find out when that was first. “Hmmm, I don’t think I’ve visited those places before. I’ve only ever visited Pangean or Kaleidoscope, only because my friends are owners there. I don’t drink much.” He’d only drink when there was an occasion or festive season, never one to have such habit in the first place.

Questions. They had many, but they didn’t think Tuah was the one to ask, unless if drinking someone’s blood could maybe offer some insight into their own brain. Or if just by asking about the flowers and bees they might unlock some more sense to it all. Sahid didn’t think so, and they were unsure as to what else to offer Tuah, except for a loud swallow and an awkward smile. They wondered if Tuah understood their reaction, if he could grapple onto something that Sahid didn’t have the strength to say. Because if someone else figured it out, it would be easier to say. Instead they were left with an uneasy feeling, not because they didn’t think Tuah would think less of them because of it, but because they didn’t want to commit to anything just yet. “Yeah, when and if I have some questions, I will ask them,” they offered. 

The comment made them scoff a little, it had been furthest from their mind, but the suggestion made them calm, because Tuah didn’t seem worried about what it meant to be a Vampire, just about because 300 years old, and thus having lived through things. “I am shit at history anyway,” they said. “Anything from the last hundred years is clear to me, the further back we go, the more vague my sense of understanding becomes.” They really should’ve asked Atlas the appropriate things to ask another Vampire. Instead they just awkwardly smiled and hoped they weren’t making a complete fool of themselves. “Guess you have a lot of... experience then,” they said, wanting to hit themselves on the head as the words rolled out. What even did that mean? 

Sahid laughed when Tuah turned away after the explanation, guessing it was just as awkward for them as it was for him, they couldn’t help the smirk when the other turned back. “Yeah? Guess you don’t really need it,” they said flirty. Friends, Sahid, just friends.

They were still smiling, despite the question, because it took a good minute before the meaning of the question came through. They blinked, then absentmindedly their hand felt the hearing piece. “I wasn’t always deaf,” they said in response, but left it there. There were few instances in their life that Sahid didn’t wish to talk about, or even to think about - unless if a lot of alcohol was involved - and the incident was first and foremost, somehow the worst of all the things they avoided. 

Sahid shrugged, as much as they wanted to take credit, as much as they wanted to be as understanding, blaming God simply didn’t make any sense to them. “Have you blamed God for things as well?” They asked, their voice curious most of all. The image of men pointing to God as their downfall had always shaken them to the core since their stepfather had shown it. God's love was expressed in many ways, if through hardship, it was not the fault of God, but the fault of sin. Humans made sin. It made sense. Even more if they connected it to their belief in Brahman: they were all part of one eternal soul, thus they all carried responsibly over actions. And Sahid realised at that point that their earlier words had been read more ominous than they had intended, fixing Tuah with a surprised stare. They swallowed, then looked away, then finally conceded. “We had a falling out about religion, I haven’t spoken to them in years,” they shared, couldn’t help another shrug, albeit lightly.

Sahid nodded with a smile. “They are.” Then stopped themselves from inviting Tuah over to meet them, too much there, too much confusing feelings of their own. “Oh, you are friends with Atlas!” And ‘the model’ they almost wanted to say. “And Bash,” they said instead. “I’ve been to both of those places… but they are a little expensive,” they said. 

[sahidchettair]

bashianofonte​:

―

Bash smiled gently at the other. “You do not have to pay for the company either. I have invited you as a friend or in hopes of such happening and neither does it cost anything to happen,” he told them as he knew that there were still others that worked there that would appreciate the tip. Or any tip, when Bash had been known to put more in there than was necessary to make up for some of his shortcomings. “It is much appreciated for those that need those tips though, so I will not tell you to take your money back. But remember that you are free to be here.” He hoped that the other could understand that as he chuckled with a shake of his head at the idea of having always wanted to own a bar.

             “I have not. You will come to learn that I have desire to feel passion and they often lead me to new experiences that I have yet to try. This bar is one of those desires. I know that one day I will grow tired and give it to someone else before I seek the next adventure that drives me forward.” His smile was soft but his tone was a bit more tired than he would have liked to let on as he considered that eventually he would run out of adventures and new experiences. It was up to him and time to tell which would happen first ― the world becoming empty or him. “Then you are already prepared.”

Sahid smiled and nodded, not against the other’s obvious need to state out loud that the company and the drinks were for free. Although they were less happy to learn they were invited as a friend, just the smallest pang of frustration hitting them before they brushed it away. Frustration did them no good. If they had learned anything from their stepfather it was that: if you can’t change anything about your situation, don’t let it get you down. They felt like they understood that. Powering through, ignoring pain because it wasn’t going to change. So they offered merely their smile, wondering on their own offer of flirting and whether they still wanted to. “I will remember,” they said, winking.

“That sounds kind of awesome,” Sahid said. “To have the time and money to do that as well,” they added solemnly. They didn’t mind the cleaning, but it was far from a passion. “What other passions have you tried so far?” They asked. “Aside from modeling and owning a bar.” Their smirk turned back to a smile, because obviously Bash had not read the flirt as a flirt. It was fine, this was fine, they were fine.

[sahidchettair]

shifter-samara​:

location: anywhere outdoors open: @astoriastarter​​

After this, Samara was never again doing anything nice. Nope, she was done. She’d thought the husky was lost, it seemed to just be wandering around. But she could see the glint and hear the tinkle of a tag attached to the collar on it’s neck. She bent down, but as fingers ruffled through the fur in an attempt to grab and read the tag, Samara felt the familiar shiver. “Really–?!” Words were cut off as hands became paws, and Samara shook her now fluffy neck, letting out a grunt. The stupid moon, and its influence over everything. Maybe others would have been able to shift into an animal so easily, but it was something Samara had practiced rather a lot. She liked herself, and really had no interest in shifting into other people, so she’d always practiced on animals, so it almost came to her even more naturally. She attempted to shift back, but to no avail. However, if she’d learned anything over the last few days, it was that the shift would wear off eventually on its own. Eyes opened to see the other –the real- husky disappearing down the street, no doubt spooked by the transformation. And Samara couldn’t blame it, honestly. Now she just had to keep out of sight until this wore off…however long that took. 

Sahid had never had a pet of their own, not that they had ever wanted to, it was just something that wasn’t done. The cats were for the crazy cat lady, dogs for the hunters. That was as much as was said at home about animals living in people’s houses. Farm land all the way round, any animal had to serve a purpose. So when Sahid saw the husky, they weren’t really sure where they stood on the matter. It was a dog, and it looked adorable, but they were trying to figure out why it looked so... odd. “Hello doggo,” they said, finding the eye contact weird. There was no one else around on the street, just them, several meters away from the husky. “Are you...” they felt weird about talking to a dog, so they sat down on their hunches, thinking it might come over to them if they did. “Are you lost? Do you have an owner somewhere?” Astoria didn’t have wild dogs, right?