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What will be, will be

Bi Buck. It finally happened.

I'm okay with Buck and Tommy as a starting pair. I just want Buck's arc to be meaningful, carefully written, and not later forgotten or explained away. A canon bisexual male character is important to be done right because its pretty much nonexistent outside of cartoons, manga, etc. They could make it all sunshine and pillow clowds, or they can bring up biphobia and/or bierasure. I just want Buck and everyone happy. Let Buck explore this new sense of self safely while being supported by the firefam, and Tommy seems like a good person for that.

If (and when because LFJ has a limited appearance) they do end things, I hope it's amicably. Someone has a habit of killing off characters, but I don't think he will risk it because that could lead to being accused of "burying." Maybe Tommy is offered a promotion, but he has to move for it. Buck encourages him to take it and waves him off with a smile. That's my best wish for a gentle split.

Maybe we'll get a comedic date between Buck and Josh where they both go, "No, we don't click, but let's have fun anyway." Then show them having a blast together. Josh points out cute guys and girls because Josh is gay not blind for Buck's opinion so he can get his type(s) to help set him up. And if it ends up pointing to Eddie, even better.

Do I want endgame Buddie? Yes. However, dropping this on Eddie out of nowhere would have been messy, clunky, and just not good storytelling. Narratively, Eddie isn't ready yet. He's still firmly on the "I need to find Chris a mother" train. If they decide to go with Marisol, I hope they flesh her out a little more to be on par with our knowledge of Karen and others. But, the actress really needs to go bye-bye for reasons and honestly so does Carla's, so have her retire.

If Buck's bisexuality finally starts the derailment when he comes out to him, in 7x5 apparently, we'll have to wait and see. Dropping Buddie in our laps now with a ✨️tadah✨️ wouldn’t feel right to me. Eddie would need his own journey of self first, which is being hinted at for the near future. But, considering his past, I don't think it'll be a fast painless one. He'll have a lot to work through, and maybe this is a place for Tommy to help because they are so similar. And if they land on demisexuality, that would make a lot of sense for Eddie. He needs that connection, as shown by the lack of it with Ana.

If Buddie happens, I'll take it, but only if it is earned from a well written script. If Buck is still considered to be with Tommy and invites him to the wedding as his plus one, but ends up kissing Eddie somehow, I'm probably going to vibrate out of my skin in anger. That would be a disservice to Eddie, Tommy, and again Buck. We don't need a Lucy repeat. It would also be a disservice to bisexual viewers everywhere because portraying them as "fickle" would not be a good.

(I think they're disheveled, btw, because they lose the rings somehow in whatever fight they have and then have to find them, which is a classic wedding trope I see 911 using. I don't think it's what a lot of people are hoping for honestly.)

Now, is strong male relationships needed on television, especially if one of them is under the rainbow umbrella? Yes. If they show Buck and Eddie in a supportive friendship for the rest of the series, that's okay. We need to be prepared for that.

So we'll have to see where the rest of the season goes and season 8. But remember, ratings make or break a show. Despite it already having representation through Hen and Karen, Josh, and now Buck, they do need to keep their general audience happy or risk cancelation down the line. So don't get your hopes too high because the opposition is out in droves. Numbers matter here. They'll need to take a long look when the season ends to take in the aftermath. To decide if they're course correcting or knuckling down with maybe Buddie or someone else for Buck.

So, ask people and allies to turn it on. If they don't want to watch it, run it on mute while doing something else. Run it on another television. Encourage new viewers. Get the word out. If you want good rep and the possibility of Buddie keep pushing on. Drown out the biphobia and other ugly voices. Get the numbers up for them to see. Don't wait to binge watch! Do it now so they can see results. Be loud and proud and show them all your love and support.

But remember, please don't attack the actors. They're just paid to follow the scripts to the best of their ability. Please don't attack the writers and producers if they don't give us Buddie. Then we might not have a show at all, or they might get angry and not do it out of sheer spite. Please don't attack multishippers, either.

I hate to say this, but if they're swayed by the naysayers, we may not get Buddie until the complete end of the series if they’re both single. Like final episode revelation ending fade to black kiss, and let the fandom take over from there. We need to be prepared for anything.

What will be, will be.

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I may not be the first to mention this, but...

If I'm reading Eddie's lips correctly during the promo clip, he's saying, "He's dead."

So, he's either breaking down about the sniper or the hostage situation. Maybe the latter because that would explain the bat? They did read his address off his license.

Or, it's a mix of both, but which is he talking about here because both men are dead? It's a toss up on which one and something else to speculate.

Or... Something happens to his father and he has the bat because of the memories?

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Prompt #1

Eddie has a tendency to haphazardly toss items in the freezer after grocery shopping. Buck follows behind to reorganize it. (My husband and I call it "Freezer Tetris," which I suck at.)

Occasionally Buck cleans the fridge out, too.

"Hey, I wonder if this one could cure anything?" Or, "How old even is this? Nope. I'm throwing out the whole container. I'm not releasing the zombie apocalypse."

---

"What did you do to my closet?"

"I was looking for my blanket. Remind me to show you how to fold a fitted sheet instead of just rolling it up like a yule log. Everything is still in the boxes. I just combined the half full ones to save room."

---

A 5+1 thing? Five times Buck rearranges/cleaned things for Eddie, and one time they rearrange things together when Buck finally moves in.

----------

Prompt #2

Buck and Eddie find things for each other like clockwork. It's exasperating at the start until it turns funny for them both. (Another thing from my husband and I. One of us can't find something and the other finds it with ease.)

"I've looked everywhere."

"Here."

"How did you... I swear I looked there. Twice!"

---

"Hey, Buck, have you seen..." Buck tosses it to him before Eddie even finishes his sentence.

"Oh, thanks."

Hen, "They're doing it again."

Buck, "What?"

---

"Okay. I need you to use our special ability and find my (item)."

"Sure. You probably overlooked it."

Chim, "Those two."

Hen, "One day they'll figure out they're meant for each other."

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Three Buddie unfinished stories below. I hope you enjoy anyway. I didn't scan through these, so please ignore any massive errors.

The third story has an ending inspired from the penguin pair and their new chick. I didn't plan for this to get so long. Whoops!

#1 - more a prompt really. Feel free to take it.

Eddie arrives at the 118 to talk to Bobby about returning to the 118. No one knows. Not even Buck, who supported Eddie through his and Chris's start/return to therapy.

They're talking again, but things aren't quite right between them yet. Occasional blowups and misunderstandings. Their relationship isn't the same as it was and Eddie's worried it never will be (though he now realizes he loves Buck and wants more, but thinks that's impossible). He can see where they both went wrong and Chris does too.

The bays are empty due to a callout minutes before where the trucks drove past Eddie at a red light and can only stare at it as it passes with Buck at the wheel, who is too focused on driving to notice Eddie.

He notices changes and starts feeling nauseous. It feels like he's been erased. His name has been replaced. Some possible missing things:

Pictures on the cork board

His favorite mug

The fridge magnet he bought as a joke at Chimney

The slightly melted, but still usable, spoonula from the one time Bobby asked him to help cook.

His favorite pool cue.

The squeegee/sponge he preferred because it was the perfect length for him to clean the windshield from top to bottom.

The cue ball that broke in half from a scratch caused by Buck somehow that sent the ball rolling through the hole for the fireman pole before anyone could stop it, memorialized by Chim on a little shelf on the wall by the pool table.

Random miscellaneous things that would go unnoticed if a person didn't know where to look.

The others come back. He knows about Lucy, but he didn't know Buck had formed that tight of a relationship with her so quickly. He tries not to panic but he's been replaced. He's too late. He slumps to the floor out of sight behind the pool table.

"Hey, where's Buck?"

"Looking for Eddie. His truck is in the lot."

---

"Open it, Eddie."

Eddie opens Buck's locker to find several of the missing items stacked inside, barely leaving enough room for Buck's personal items. More in Chim's locker and Hens. His turnout and helmet are in Bobby's office.

Buck hands Eddie a jewelry box. Inside is his nameplate, shined and waiting.

Ending somehow leads to Buddie endgame.

---------

#2 Warning! This one is possible hurt/no comfort.

Chris does the same to Buck as he did to Eddie at Christmas during a game/movie night. Buck understands Eddie's situation now. But, he still tells Chris no. It's the job he loves and fought to get back.

"Are you going to quit, Buck? You could die, too."

Buck and Eddie get into an argument where a lot of hurtful things are said on both sides, more from Eddie than Buck. Buck walks out the door. Eddie has a panic attack and Chris is screaming.

A few days later, Eddie is in front of his lawyer's office wondering where things went wrong. The future he thought he saw crumbles to ashes behind his eyelids. He and Buck went up in destructive flames. He realizes it's the day he refused to believe the universe screams. When he ran into Ana and began that doomed relationship. Where his with Buck began to fracture. Where he talked to a man that couldn't be a firefighter despite wanting to be. He could be a firefighter, but does he want to be now?

Either he opens the door for the hurt/no comfort ending,

or...

He turns around and goes back to the truck. Buck was right and he should have listened. He now sees he needs to get Chris help as soon as possible. And maybe himself, but he doesn't matter right now. Only Chris.

And in turn the therapist tricks Eddie into his own talking at the same time, until Eddie catches on and finally agrees to his own therapy.

"46% of children with CP in a study reported anxiety, Eddie. It's more common than you think. Compound that with his inability to express his emotions and it's a dangerous cocktail. We can try him on a medication to see if this helps and continue his sessions."

"I didn't want him like me. He learned it from me. I don't... My dad."

"Toxic masculinity and Latin machismo. If I had a dollar for every... I'd be able to splurge on at least a Rolex."

---

"Eddie, nurture is one of the biggest ways a child learns. They mimic, emulate, and mirror. Especially their parents."

"He saw Shannon breaking things when she was upset. Now he's doing it, too."

---

"Eddie, you can't let every decision or choice you make be because of Chris."

"I get it. I begged my father to quit smoking, but he did until the week before we buried him for lung cancer despite having to use an electrolarynx."

"Imagine a teenager who hates her stepfather because he doesn't put up with the crap she tries to pull. There's no physical or mental abuse. He helps provide for the family. The mother understands because his actions are to discipline her. As a couple, they're happy and in love. But, the daughter keeps demanding she divorce him because he's "mean." He's ruining her life. Her friends make fun of her he took her phone. Should she divorce him? That's her kid that's unhappy. Or, should she sit the kid down and talk to her?"

"My kid tried to hide a kitten despite my many explanations that I'm highly allergic. I knew as soon as I started wheezing. Children sometimes don't get their way, especially if it's hurting another family member."

"If you understand Buck could die, too, why didn't you ask him to quit?"

"Your wife wasn't a firefighter."

"When is the last time you did something for yourself? Bought something for yourself? What do you like to do? No Chris. No Buck. Just you. If you had a completely free, no obligations day, what would you do?"

"I was shot! Not in a warzone, but in the middle of the street! Why me?! Why the fuck was it me?"

"Dragging him... Okay, let's talk about that comment right now."

"I screwed up. I overcorrected so badly, I'm in the ditch."

---

"Ed - Whoa!"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You were right. I should have. You were right. I'm sorry."

"Eddie, shhh. I got you. Alright? Come here."

---

"How are you so forgiving? Of the things I said? I knew where to hurt you the worst. I took your insecurities and turned them into weaponized words."

"I knew you were hurting and confused, Eddie."

"Still."

"Sometimes you have to let the bird try to fly while it's wing is still broken so it realizes it's still in pain. That it needs to heal more. You were that bird in my mind, Eddie."

---

"You don't have to apologize. I understand because he blindsided me, too, but... I didn't realize it was the warning sign it should have been. What Chris asked of you... I didn't know he was going to do that, Buck.

---

"Can we try again? To fix...us? To go back to the way we were?"

"We can't, Eddie."

"What?"

"What we had... I don't think we can go back to that. Like Maddie and Chim weren't the same after Doug. They just started something else. Like a new beginning, I guess. Or Japanese kintsugi would be a better description, maybe?"

"Kint-what?"

--------

#3

Eddie runs into the man from Jinxed. He finally succeeded and is now a probationary firefighter after a bit of jail time and therapy. He's excited and doesn't let Eddie get a word in edgewise.

He starts to remember his own excitement from his beginning days. The rush. The fulfilment of successfully saving someone. He misses it more than he ever has.

It's the jumpstart he needed to finally start getting the therapy Chris and he needs.

Buck has an amicable split from Taylor because she's moving to an affiliate news station for an anchor position and she knows he's not going to leave LA. His sister and Jee-Yun are there. And she hinted at Eddie, but it goes over his head.

Eddie goes with Chris to therapy where he starts asking questions about Shannon after she is brought up by the therapist. Eddie feels like an idiot and starts answering them.

"I don't remember her much."

"And I don't tell you about her. Mijo, I'm sorry."

"She loved Christmas. I remember that."

"And when she was done decorating, she always said "Perfect." with that little happy twirl of hers. Her mom teased her by telling me she did it every year since she was little. Her own Christmas magic."

"She didn't the year before she died. With the tree."

"No, she didn't. I get it now. Chris, I'm sorry."

"Chris, let's talk a little. Do you think of Christmas and your mom's death together?"

"Is that bad?"

Eddie can only meet the therapist eyes in understanding.

He starts his own therapy and slowly realizes he's quite fucked up in the head for many reasons. The therapist asks if he wants to start from the past to the present or go backwards through events. He chooses the past because he's further removed from it in his opinion.

The therapist goes a little further back and surprisingly asks about his childhood.

"Why?"

"Humor me."

Eddie rambles for a few sessions with guided questions from the therapist who only sighs at the end.

"What?"

"I really hope Latin machismo eventually fades one day just like the idea that not bathing was considered healthy. And no, I'm not being racist here, I can see you brewing for an argument. Let me explain. We also call it toxic masculinity.

Men having to provide for the women. Shannon stayed home to watch Chris while you provided for the family instead of her helping you. Your father insisted your mother stay at home despite being a registered nurse."

"She picked up a job after my sister started school at a nursing home. I think they argued when he came home. She hasn't had a job since."

"Controlling your choices or trying to force you to make one with his approval. Baseball instead of the science club. Soccer instead of theater with your sisters.

Applying for Texas A&M because that's where he went instead of University of Texas where you wanted to go. You even said yourself you think he threw away their acceptance letter. You wanted to be a nurse like your mother, but he "encouraged" you to go for a being a doctor. You burned out because it was too much, but you could have succeeded if you had stayed on track for nursing because it's what you really wanted at the time. If your son said he wanted to be a gardener, would you instead tell him to be a botanist?"

"No."

I...let my parents ruin my life and didn't fight back.

"Would you have married Shannon if they hadn't pushed?"

"We had already split up twice before. Our relationship...ran hot if you know what I mean. The one time we weren't careful enough, Chris happened. We were already halfway to split up again when she realized she was pregnant. We were always arguing. I don't ever remember even looking at rings before then. Maybe in passing, but it never solidified. Until Chris."

"No. Think again."

"Until my parents stepped in. Shannon didn't even want to get married until her mom encouraged her to because they just found out she was sick."

I let my parents control my life and didn't fight back.

"Do you regret it?"

"Chris? Never!"

"Marrying Shannon. Would you have still joined the military if you hadn't?"

"I had dropped out of my last year at A&M and was working at a garage. Shannon wanted an Aunt Annie pretzel from the mall because of cravings and while getting it, I walked passed a recruitment office. I signed up. I didn't even talk to her about it. I just did what I thought I could do to support her at the time."

I let my parents ruin Shannon's life and didn't fight back.

"Do you regret marrying Shannon?"

"She asked me for a divorce. Right before she died. She was leaving again and then she was gone forever. I was... confused and angry because I thought our family was going to be whole again. She told me she was pregnant! And then it all got ripped away. The baby and then her."

"Eddie, answer the question."

"Yes! Damn it! Yes! I wouldn't have gone to Afghanistan and avoided all of what happened to me! Shannon would have went to her mom instead of being around my controlling parents who made her feel like a worthless mother! We still would have had Chris. She could have found a man who loved her better than I could and been happy! I could have gone back to school for something. I could have found someone else, too, but I was stuck and couldn't even look at someone else without my father reminding me of my pointless vows! She'd probably still be alive and Chris would still have his mom!"

"Take a deep breath, Eddie."

---

"I... I've never admitted that out loud before."

"Last time we started talking about toxic masculinity. I have a few more things if you don't mind."

"I looked it up. I get what you're saying now. My friend, Buck. I told you about him. He helped me walk through all of it. He joked that all the website needed was a picture of my dad as an example."

"Your father always demanded respect from you and your sisters and if you didn't you were torn down until you did. Even when he's doing something that you don't agree with. Like harassing your neighbors just because they were lesbians. Your older sister tried to gently chide him and he basically went "This is my house, my rules. You will not tell me what to do.""

"In my defense, I didn't realize they were together until a few years later."

Thank you, Scott. I wonder where you are now? Did you succeed?

"The whole concept that men aren't supposed to show emotions. Your grandfather died when you were twelve. Why shouldn't you have cried? You watched your dog get hit by a car. A dog you'd had since you were seven, and you weren't supposed to cry. To be frank, and briefly unprofessional, that's bullshit and you know it. Do you expect the same from your son?"

"No! Well, he doesn't cry much anyway. He didn't even cry at... Shannon's funeral. Oh my god. Buck said he didn't cry when I was shot. Instead he comforted Buck."

I let my parents ruin me and didn't fight back until they tried to do the same to Chris.

"Children learn more from their parents even if they're not speaking."

"This ends. With me. I swear it ends."

"Then let's get started."

---

"If I may... When we were discussing Shannon you said something, twice in fact, that I'm not even sure you noticed because of what you were admitting."

"What?"

"For Shannon, you said she could have found a man. You, instead, for yourself said someone."

"Did I?"

"You did."

"I meant woman."

"Eddie."

"I'm... I'm... I was married and had a girlfriend!"

"So? There's your father again, right? The lesbians next door. He probably cussed or threw offensive words at Elton John. Maybe Catholic guilt mixed in?

"I..."

"High school. Look, Buck went on a research binge because a woman at a scene was asexual and the man hitting on her wasn't getting the hint. He tried to drug her drink, but ended up grabbing the wrong glass and dosed himself."

"How long, Eddie? How long have you denied yourself?"

"I'm not. Not... really, no. I just..."

"Eddie, how long have you known?"

"Karmic justice. Sorry. Continue."

"Shannon and I started out as friends. Her locker was always next to mine and seating charts almost always had us together because her name was alphabetically behind mine. Shannon Dickenson. I never had problems with sex with her... for the most part. Sometimes I just wasn't in the mood no matter what she did. That... was one of our first arguments actually."

"Buck started reading all of these sexualities to me because he thought there were only gay, bisexual, and straight. Gray ace made sense if you know what I mean."

"I'm aware of all the terminology."

"But once you started that fighting..."

"Poof, it got worse. I think I was forcing or tricking myself after she came back because I wanted that connection back. I thought it was back so it became easier. With Ana, it just...never clicked. I thought I could kiss her until I was driving home from... a bizarre date turned math lesson."

"Math?"

"She was a teacher. But on the drive home, I was relieved it didn't happen. She kept insinuating she wanted to have sex, taking my clothes off, but we never did. I kept hoping, but nothing. That solidified the gray ace in my head.

"Anything else?"

"No."

"Eddie, I told you on our first meeting that all lying must stop at the door for this to work. You said high school."

"One of the varsity pitchers, Elliot, my sophomore year took me under his wing. Before... before I really connected with Shannon. I didn't want to play baseball, but I was told I had a good fastball and he made it fun. We talked while goofing off as we tossed the ball back and forth. About anything we wanted to. Because of him, I was bumped to varsity mid season.

"Shannon and I were split up and my first year roommate, Scott, was openly gay. He was funny. Loved singing, although badly, and dancing around like nothing else mattered in the world. Flamboyant but not obnoxiously so. Brilliant. Like really brilliant. He was doing calculations that made my eyes cross with ease.

One game, I had to sit out because I had twisted my ankle and was benched for a week. Elliot was on the mound and for a few seconds a ray of sunlight hit him just right. Back straight, head up, ball tucked behind his back with his mitt down at his side. And it hit me. Then the shame quickly followed because he was a boy."

"Anyone else?"

He tinkered around with things people brought to him. He fixed the card reader for the building before the technician even got there. My computer was so advanced I could barely use it when he was done with it.

Spoke two languages besides English fluently. And he was so kind. Generous to a fault."

"Eddie."

"We ended up getting drunk one night on cheap beer another student had snuck in. I woke up naked in his bed. I didn't leave it before he woke up."

"How long were you together?"

"Until the end of the school term. He was offered a transfer to MIT because one of his professors had shown his designs to them. I wouldn't let him turn it down. It was MIT! I couldn't let him turn that down for me."

"I know. But you didn't want him to leave."

"No, I didn't."

"It was the right choice, Eddie. You didn't want to hold him back."

"I know. Once I arrived back home... It didn't feel wrong until I got home under their watchful eyes again."

"And then Shannon came back."

"During the summer between my third and fourth year. I dropped out right before Christmas break. I couldn't take it any more. Ha, Hen doesn't know why I help her so often with her studies. I forgot to tell her. Oops.

There was no one else in between Scott and Shannon. A few people tried, but I just wasn't interested in hooking up. I have only slept with two people my entire life. One woman and one man."

"There's no shame in that, Eddie. Not the number and not the genders. None."

"Isn't there?"

"Was Scott ashamed?"

"No."

"Is your friend Hen ashamed."

"No."

"Anyone else you know?"

"At first yes, but he isn't now. Oh."

"And I think he gets it."

"Shut up."

"Nope."

---

"So, Afghanistan."

"Been there, been shot, don't recommend."

"Nice try."

"So that didn't work?"

"Nope."

"Dammit."

---

"The ladder truck explosion."

"Why do we need to talk about that?"

"Keep humoring me."

---

"The well collapse."

"How do you even know that was me?"

"How about the several news cameras that recorded everything. All I have to do is Google and you're everywhere. You and Buck."

"Really?"

"Have you watched any of them?"

"No."

"I recommend you do."

"Why?"

"You'll see. Now tell me what happened from your perspective."

---

"How do you feel about talking about the sniper?"

"Nope. Not today."

"All right."

"Wait? What? No pushing this time?"

"No. How are you feeling in relation to Chris's therapy and talking about Shannon? I know we've talked about showing Chris how to healthily express emotions."

---

"I was shot. In broad daylight. In the middle of an LA street by someone with a vendetta against the fire department because the LAFD kept reviving his former partner! Then the wacko shot Bobby, too. I'm stuck in the hospital with Ana when all I wanted was my son and...

Then I almost drop out of a crashed medical helicopter, I don't even know how many stories to the ground, from the roof of a hospital.

Then I'm taken hostage with Buck by escaped prisoners because one of them had a dying son and demanded to be taken to him at the hospital! He killed himself, don't breathe a word of this to anyone or I'll sue, to save his son by giving him his heart. And, I somehow related to him because I would do anything for my son, too, and the thought makes me sick.

Then we almost lost two innocent children in the hospital fire because of a reflection!

My son, Shannon, my grandmother, Buck, Chim, Maddie, Athena, Bobby. Me. I hate hospitals! I hate hospitals!

And helicopters! If there's another helicopter involved, I'm walking the fuck away. I'll show someone else how to power them down and then I'm never going near one again. If there's ever a medivac, I'm going to the truck and staying there."

"Hospitals because you never know if they're going to come back out. Including yourself. Helicopters because it sounds like nothing good has ever happened to you while being in one. War and almost falling."

"Hen almost died in a crash and Taylor Kelly."

"The 118 responded to her helicopter accident a few years ago?"

"Yup. And I wish we hadn't."

"Why?"

"Nope."

"Your using a different tense, Eddie."

"What?"

"I'm going. I'm walking. You haven't noticed but you've been using present or future tense for a while when talking about the 118. When you first starting talking about it weeks ago, it was past tense. How do you feel about that? Then we'll back track to...all the rest.

---

"Taylor Kelly. News reporter and former girlfriend of one Evan "Buck" Buckley."

"Damn internet."

"So lets finally talk about Buck beyond the ladder truck and lawsuit."

"Do we have to?"

"If you can tell me right now why we need to talk about Buck, I'll let it go."

"I made his Christopher's guardian without asking him first?"

"You did what? That was your one chance to come clean, Eddie, before I poke and prod it out of you."

"Fuck."

---

During all of this, he has his own cheering squad in Buck and the 118, who he's still in contact with. He meets Lucy and isn't too enthused because she's encouraging Buck to do riskier and riskier rescues, and he's not there to stop him or have his back.

He meets back up with the man from Jinx for coffee where he learns he's had his first loss and is taking it hard. Their other station probie had made a major mistake and it cost him time he didn't have to get to the victim. Eddie walks him through his guilt and recommends seeing his therapist again, at least once.

Chris and Eddie both learn to deal with their traumas and their emotions. It's hard for Eddie, but he's trying for Chris. Especially about Shannon. He's been sharing one memory of her a night before bedtime.

Buck is Eddie's decompression after each session. Eddie can talk about it if he wants. If not, Buck just sits with him while reading a book, etc. in the silence.

"I have your back, Eddie. If you need to cry, then cry. If you need to punch something, we'll head to the gym. If you need to yell, I'll find the closest place to do it. And if you're happy... Show me that because it makes me happy, too."

Buck starts sharing funny and/or gross calls when Eddie asks.

---

"Evan Buckley, what the fuck were you thinking? Did you think I wouldn't see that all over the news?"

"I'm fine! I swear! Nothing happened."

"I don't care what she tells you, you are taking too many risks. This isn't a competition or a talent show. You're going to get hurt or worse. Or her. You want that on your conscience?"

"No. Ow!"

"Then quit it."

---

"So. I finally watched some footage from the well collapse."

"Um..."

"Care to explain?"

"Did Chris just call for me? I'll be right back."

---

A rescue to get a teenager out of a basement rec room at a youth center, under Bobby's order of, "Don't get caught, Eddie, or it's both our butts in the hot seat."

He tells Bobby when returns the spare turnout that he's ready to come back.

"After discussing it with Chris, of course. Do I need to recertify or reapply? Do you even have a spot for me?"

"Eddie, I've had you on extended unpaid medical leave with LAFD approval since the paperwork was filed after Christmas."

"That was months ago!"

"Yup."

"How did you..."

"I know my team. And I saw your face. You really don't like Lucy, do you?"

"Nope or that gear. It stinks."

"Agreed."

---

Chris surprises him by being really excited about the possibility of him going back.

"We were, uh, actually talking about it today when I picked him up from school. You tried to play it cool, but did you really think I wouldn't recognize you through that mask yesterday before you could run away? We were going to talk to you actually, but you brought it up first."

"Busted, I guess. That gear reeks, by the way. I don't think it's been used in years. Bobby is ordering a replacement."

"Why we're you there anyway?"

"I was at the bank. The atm closest to home chewed up my card. I had to go to a larger branch to replace it. Then the lot was blocked by you parking the 118 rig right in front of the exit."

"Oops?"

"So you're really okay with me going back?"

"Yeah, dad. Just be careful. And you have Buck."

"I will keep him as safe as I can, buddy, but..."

"There's no promises because anything can happen to anyone at any time. Whether their a firefighter or not. I know, Buck."

---

"Um, okay. So. Did you hear about the male penguins that have their own chick now?"

"Yea, I did."

"So... Random Eddie babble about penguins and how same sex pairings have adopted eggs for years and stuttering until " I hope I haven't been reading this wrong and if I ask you on a date, you'll say yes, and then Chris would be like our chick or whatever."

Buck busts out laughing, but quickly answers yes through his laughter when he sees Eddie start to get nervous and back up.

"Really?"

"Yes, really."

"Why are you still laughing?"

"The stuttering, blushing. Chris is a penguin chick now. I just saw a whole different side of you, Eddie Diaz. Were you like that with Shannon and Ana?"

"Shannon, yes. Scott, yes. Ana, no. Did I really call Chris a chick?"

"Yup."

[saltisnacks]

Prompt #2 is below - Chris's only clear memories of Shannon before she died are Christmas and their time at the beach. Another idea of what caused his outburst.

Rated T+ for language. Major character injury. Disassociation. Angst. Hurt/Comfort. Get Chris and Eddie (and Buck!) into therapy in 5b, istg!

Buddie prompt #1

During a call Buck is accidentally sprayed by blood. He starts yelling for Eddie. The patient starts coding and Buck goes catatonic before collapsing.

Unbeknownst to the crew someone in the crowd recorded the entire incident and is making fun of Buck for "losing it."

May finds the video while on shift at dispatch. She sits Eddie down, and shows him after warning him it's bad.

Bobby unexpectedly breaks and unleashes on Eddie as soon as he walks through the bay doors.

He knows Eddie hasn't responded to any of Buck's texts or calls. That Eddie knows about Buck's abandonment issues and still did the same thing. He brings up how Eddie has refused to deal with his (and Buck's) traumas.

He mentions how Harry is in therapy. How Chris was in therapy after the tsunami. He mentions Maddie's PPD. Hen's therapy after the ambulance accident.

The shooting and well collapse were freak accidents that were beyond anyone's control.

"We know you faked your way through therapy with Frank after the shooting. He almost didn't let you come back! I had to talk Chief Alonzo into letting you. Maybe I shouldn't have!"

"We all saw you struggling. We thought you'd eventually talk to Buck about everything. You know, supposedly your best friend? Who had a front row seat to you being shot?! But you kept it in. And he didn't want to force you because he didn't want to, and I quote, "Make it about him and be exhausting!" Remember that?!"

"I told you to didn't have to lose everything before you allow yourself to feel something! Fat good that advice did. You still blame yourself for everything with Shannon. Don't say you don't. You think you failed your kid again. But who have you really failed the most? Yourself!"

"You don't blame Buck for the tsunami, so why are you blaming yourself for all of this?" You were a firefighter! You know people can be injured or die at any time. Shannon was hit by a car! Mudslides. Earthquakes. Stupid stunts. Car crashes."

"You were the final straw! You pulled Christopher and yourself away from Buck and he's been trying trying to understand why you left. At least Hen, Ravi, and I were trying to help him. Taylor tried before she washed her hands of it all and walked away, too! Hear that? She left him, too!"

"I didn't-I didn't know."

"And why is that, Eddie?! The person he needed most was you! He needed you! You! Buck would bend over backward and stand on his head for you or Chris. He'd give you his last heartbeat just to keep yours going! You let him flounder while you drowned instead of supporting each other. You think he wouldn't have been there for Chris after his outburst about you dying?"

"Did you know Chris called Buck? I'm surprised Carla hasn't snapped at you about it. He didn't want you to quit! He was in tears crying to Buck saying it was all his fault. That he misses Buck, and he caused all this. He blames himself because of what he said."

"That kid is old enough to understand death, and you should have talked to him about it. Instead, let me guess. You used Chris to escape. You both need help. All three of you do!"

"Sue called me. We talked. You're on paid leave starting today until you see a therapist and actually talk about everything. HIPPA safe limited information documented, signed off, proof. No exceptions. We can't have a compromised first responder. You have two weeks to find a solution before you're terminated. And while you're at it, maybe ask why you can't admit to yourself you're in love with Buck."

Hen barely catches Eddie after Bobby storms away.

---

"Where's Buck, Hen?"

"In the hospital."

"What?!"

"Everything... The memories after the blood hit him and you not being there. You weren't there to reassure him, Eddie. He couldn't see you. He couldn't find you. Everything... We thought maybe he was having a heart attack from another blood clot. He had all the symptoms, but he was just... Not there to talk to us. He went blank, Eddie. It was scary to see. So we thought maybe it was a panic attack with disassociation. But..."

"Hen."

"It was so bad, he slipped into arrhythmia. We thought we were going to have to shock him on the way to the hospital. They ran tests as soon as they could. His heart... Takotsubo syndrome."

"Bro-broken hearted syndrome?"

---

Eddie breaks down as soon as he sees Buck. "I'm a fool. I didn't listen to Bobby or Frank. I kept it all in again and ended up hurting everyone. Chris. You. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

---

Eddie doesn't expect Chris to starts struggling and flailing at him as soon as he gets home.

"Buck's heart broke! Because of us!"

"You know."

"They couldn't talk to you or Maddie so they called Carla! She gave them permission to make him sleep."

"I'm on Buck's emergency contact list ahead of Bobby in case he's on shift. You, Maddie, me, Bobby, Athena, then Hen are all on his paperwork in that order."

"I'm sorry, Chris. I need to fix this. I never meant for any of this to happen."

---

"I just missed mom. She died before another Christmas together."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't know how. Like after the tsunami. I'm scared you will, too. Not just from being a firefighter. Mom wasn't. My friend at school's dad died from cancer. Mrs. Phillips was out for a month because her husband died in a car wreck. You almost died after you were shot, but you didn't talk about it. You fell over at the store."

(conversation can blend from parts of prompt two about Chris's only real memories with Shannon are Christmas and the beach.)

Eddie talks to Chris about family and individual counseling. He finally talks to Chris about his will.

---

"I'm sorry, Eddie, I shouldn't have snapped like I did. On the other hand, I'm not."

"I know, Bobby. I needed the ass kick, and you delivered it. If you hadn't, Carla was about to if she saw Chris break down again. She chewed me out too last night. Chris is demanding to see Buck. If I... I miss it. Despite everything, I miss being out there."

"When the time comes, if you decide and get an official release, you're welcome to come back. For now, Sue says as long as you're getting therapy you can stay at dispatch."

"How? I quit."

"I've talked to Chief Alonzo. He understands. You will have to meet with him directly before returning to duty. Official orders straight from his mouth. Just to talk and make sure your head is on straight this time."

----------

Prompt #2

Chris tricks a classmate's mom into dropping him off at Buck's after a sleepover because he hasn't seen him since Eddie quit.

Buck tries to call Eddie, despite Chris begging him not to, but Eddie is asleep due to emotional and physical exhaustion from overthinking and stress.

His actions are starting to catch up with him in various ways. Chris's continued outbursts, now focused on his new job as a mechanic at a dealership.

"Career day is next week. You're dad's a firefighter. Do you think he can bring the big truck?"

"My dad quit. He's a mechanic now."

"Oh. My dad's cousin is a mechanic. He dropped out of doctor school. Dad calls him a loser." Chris remains silent and Eddie is crushed.

Missing Buck. Realizing why he misses Buck so much. Internalized phobia about being bi/demi/gay. Religious guilt. The thought of upsetting his family.

Compounding nightmares combining being shot, Shannon, Afghanistan, and/or being buried. Losing Chris or Buck. Overdue bills because the only job he could find for his experience came with a drastic cut in pay. His new insurance is limiting Chris's therapies. (True story - our insurance limited my child to 25 total therapy sessions a year, including both OT and speech under the cap. Any beyond that is out of pocket. Yea, I'm still mad about this.)

More panic attacks that are getting worse. Losing coverage to help pay Carla so her job reassigned her. His landlord trying to raise rent to help pay for future improvements to the properties. Helping a man having a heart attack while at the zoo with Chris using the yearly passes Buck bought.

"Heard you quit, Diaz. Move and let us still in the LAFD deal with it." Chris stormed off and refused to talk to Eddie for the rest of the day.

---

Buck and Chris talk about Chris being scared. The association with Christmas and his mom. How he really didn't want Eddie to quit. The risks of being a firefighter where Buck states the truth. The biggest risk is cancer from hazardous materials and smoke, but if they use their equipment correctly, the risk drops. He tells Chris he would try really hard to always make sure Eddie came home, but nothing is guaranteed.

"Without good doctors, Harry's dad could have died from something bad in his head. A tumor. Even eating food can be dangerous, Chris. See this scar? I choked on bread. A bite of baked dough. I almost died. Abby saved me and it gave me this tiny scar. Just like the doctors saving your dad's life led to his scars. Scars show that we survived. You've seen the scars on my leg. I almost died then to."

"I know you saw me throw up blood at Bobby and Athena's that night. I'm sorry you had to see that. It probably really scared you, and I should have talked to you about it. That's my mistake. Hen, Chim, Maddie, and your dad saved me."

"As long as there are good people, Good Samaritans from the Bible. I know you went to church, so you should know the story."

"He stopped and helped the man when no one else would."

"Yes, he did. As long as there are good Samaritans, many lives can be saved. Quick thinking and dialing 911 as soon as possible to get them in good hands and to the hospital to the doctors."

"Don't mistake me, if there aren't good people who can act and focus beyond their panic, sometimes it is too late. Like the bystanders who waited too long to call 911 last week when a man accidentally fell down a set of stairs."

"I know you don't want to hear it, but death, when it comes for us, is unavoidable. Old age. Massive heart attacks. My older brother, Daniel, died of leukemia. My parents had me for a stem cell transfusion(?), but it ultimately didn't work."

"You had a brother? "

"Yea, I did. Daniel Buckley. He died before I could remember him. The procedure didn't last, and he relapsed, or it was too late. I'm not sure really. Maddie has a picture. I kind of looked like him when I was younger."

"Dad told me you saved him. He doesn't remember a lot, but he knows you did. You were his good Samaritan."

"I drug your dad to safety and the others and Captain Mahta helped me get him to the hospital despite the sniper still firing at us. Good people under pressure."

"Your dad was one of those amazing good people who helped so many others. He helped me save a kid and his sister by figuring out the boy had the numbers backwards. Like a mirror. He said 318 instead of 81E. Your dad did that. He figured it out and we acted to save them."

"I didn't want him to quit! I was thinking about how mom was only here for one Christmas. That's all I remember. And the beach trip we took. That's it. And dad won't talk about her."

"Chris, holy... crud."

"What did she like? Did she like broccoli? Did she wear makeup like May? Do I have any uncles or aunts I don't know? What was her job? I don't know!"

"I don't know. Eddie, you idiot. You need... You need to talk to your dad about this."

The shooting. Ana. His dad yelling at someone over the phone about his insurance. How they may have to move because dad can't afford the rent anymore.

After listening to Buck's voicemail, Eddie goes to them and lets himself into the apartment. Chris is asleep upstairs after wearing himself out from crying. Buck drags Eddie out to the balcony and rips Eddie a new one.

"You thought you were doing right by Chris. What a good job you've done, Eddie! Is this even really about him, or is it something else? Talk to me! You're losing everything, Eddie! Carla! Chris's coverage! And now possibly your home! Why aren't you fighting harder, dammit?! What the fuck are you thinking?!"

"Did you even ask Chris what he wants or did you just fucking assume? Because he was only missing his mom. Like I told you. I told you it was Shannon! You didn't talk to him."

"He associates Christmas with her. That's the only Christmas he remembers with her. And it's not the tsunami keeping him from going to the beach. It's the memory of her! He doesn't remember much before with her than that because he was too young when she left! His only real memories of her! He associates Christmas and the beach with her death because that's all he has!" Eddie can only stare at Buck in shock.

"For fuck's sake, do you even keep her memory alive? My parents didn't for Daniel and it destroyed them and in turn Maddie and me. They wiped him away entirely. Do you talk about her to him at all? Because from what I can guess from what he asked me, the answer is no! So you tell me, what the fuck is going on?"

"I didn't know... How? Oh my God. It's my fault. It's all my fault. I didn't... Buck. I refuse to be like your parents. Oh my god, Buck!"

---

Eddie finally breaks and it all comes flooding out.

"He said I didn't have to lose everything before I let myself feel. Is that what I'm trying to do? Am I that fatalistic? All I hear in my head is "Suck it up, Edmundo. Men are supposed to be strong." Blah blah ad nauseam."

"In all honesty, your dad can go suck a bag of lemons so his face matches his heart. Shriveled and sour. That is so toxic. Dr. Copeland told me the same damn thing."

"She did?"

"We all have emotions for a reason. We aren't unfeeling robots. Early man went "Ugh!" but there's evidence of emotion. They're mentioned in the Bible, I think. If they were unnecessary, don't you think evolution would have wiped their purpose like the appendix by now? How many serial killers have been emotionless psychopaths?"

"What about the opposite? Why is that allowed? Why is a man allowed to be happy and celebrate if emotions are bad?"

"My dad didn't even smile at Sophia's birth. Or Christopher's. Or at Sophia graduating summa cum laude. I think his face is frozen in stone unless he's angry."

"Oh, so anger is allowed, but nothing else is? If I had my way, he'd never speak another word to Chris until he's reached maturity. Chris doesn't need to be poisoned, Eddie. Thinking like your dad is so fucking toxic, men with this belief should come with a warning sign."

"Where's mine?"

"Tossed in the shredder waiting for you to hit the power button. You just need to find your version of a cure. Or anti-venom, I guess. Cut off the head of the snake sunk into you and yank out the fangs. Just no street fighting again, please."

"Ha ha. I learned my lesson there."

---

"With your permission, I'd like to restart Chris's therapy. I'd need a signed document from you and your lawyer. He needs to break the happy memories he has with her away from her death. To learn how to separate it from Christmas and the beach."

"I... Okay. Yes. I'll get it tomorrow. Wait. My insurance probably won't-"

"Eddie, I've got it. I'll pay out of pocket if I have to. I have enough. I'm a single man with a fully paid vehicle and surprisingly cheap rent and utilities for LA. Trust me."

"Single? But you have Taylor?"

"Um... Not as of two weeks ago when she accepted an anchor position in Chicago."

"What?"

"She wanted me to move with her. I told her no. My family is here. I'm not leaving. Period. She threw a fit. It didn't... end well."

---

"Dr. Copeland says her business partner at their office has an opening and is willing to take you as a client. She can give her a brief rundown, with your permission, so she can prepare. I've...uh...talked about you... quite a bit. No judgement. Just listening and advice. Guidance to learning how to heal and be better. Please. And before you say anything, I'm helping pay if you need it. Don't argue."

"Okay."

---

"Missed you, Buck. I'm an idiot. I should have talked to you sooner. I'm sorry."

[saltisnacks]

#technically 4 in you include the crossover

it all comes down to the helicopter crash we care about vs. the helicopter crash we do not care about

[saltisnacks]

Buddie prompt - heavy angst concerning Chris and Eddie in places, arguing, anger, emotional breaks, hurt Buck and Ravi, near death, possible major character death (mcd) if you want to take it that way, etc. This is long and gets, for lack of a better descriptive, dark, so I'm putting it under a cut.

Maybe this could be read as an incomplete story? There's enough to get a gist, I guess. But if someone has the writing chops to work the rest out, have at it.

If you do decide to add to this, please claim it in the comments to avoid any plagiarism finger pointing messes. If it helps, please refer to this prompt to show where you're getting it from and to show I'm giving free reign to whomever takes it.

Read with caution because it's not exactly nice to Chris and Eddie has to walk away from him several times, once by choice. This wouldn't leave my mind.

If you don't want to read the mcd, stop reading after the word Or... But it does have a little redemption for Eddie's father in it.

There's a bit of repetition in places, but Eddie isn't really in the right mind at the times to realize it. It's done on purpose. When my husband had his heart attack, I repeated myself, unknowingly, several times until someone told me later. I took my headspace at that time and made it Eddie's, kind of.

---

Eddie starts working at dispatch. With Maddie still away, Josh and Sue train him. After a few days, Josh asks why he switched while they're on a lunch break. As "outsiders" they start working Eddie through his issues and encourage him to try therapy again with one of Josh's ex-boyfriends.

He finally starts to work through everything. From Afghanistan to the hostage situation. The therapist is kind of floored at everything. Eddie can only shrug and snort a laugh at his initial response during their first session. He decides then and there he's going to like this guy and try to work with him.

"Professional opinion incoming, but unprofessional opinion is... Well, you are all sorts of fucked up, I see."

Josh notices how much Eddie talks about Buck and gently starts a discussion about sexuality. He brings that up in therapy and they work through that and his parental issues. He finally admits out loud,

"I think... I might be... probably in love with Buck."

"Think? Probably? Want to try again?"

"I know I'm definitely in love with Buck."

"There we go. And why bring up your parents before this?"

"I'm already a disappointment."

"Okay. No. Back up and let's focus on this for a second. Why would you think this?"

---

"Here's a good website about sexuality. It breaks it down into smaller easier to digest sections. I have an inkling about which one will stand out to you from our previous discussions, but let's see if you agree. This is your homework for next session. If you have any questions, we can talk then."

---

The therapist politely rips Eddie a new one about Chris after another bad argument, and getting him into therapy because his reaction isn't healthy. He points out Shannon and the possibility of Abuela passing as examples. The pandemic. He was a firefighter, so he should know death comes at any time.

"Should we all stop driving cars? Reinstitute prohibition? Outlaw knives so there are no accidents like that man tripping over his cat last week on the news? Destroy staircases to prevent broken necks? Forbid swimming in all water deeper than half an inch? All foods processed into smoothies to prevent choking? Fancy a chicken milkshake, Eddie?"

"No thank you, but I see your point."

"Your son needs professional help. Like today if possible. Wait. Here it is. This number is for Chad Riggins. He's the best child therapists I know in the city. We're calling him now."

---

It all snowballs after Eddie basically "blows up" during one of Chris's sessions. "I'm not happy, Chris!" The argument is so bad the therapist has to separate them.

Pepa picks up Chris and Eddie flees to Buck where he completely breaks down. They have a much needed talk. Eddie learns Taylor and him barely made it passed New Year before breaking up. Maybe she got a job offer in Chicago or New York , so they amicably split. Or, maybe they argued over Eddie and Chris and not so amicably split.

Eddie stays with Buck for a few days while Chris stays with Abuela.

"Who or what are you going to blame when I die, Chris? Hmm? My doctor? Tía Pepa? You can't keep your father straightjacketed in a locked cage."

His therapist recommends some further in-patient therapy so they can get a handle on why Chris is behaving like this.

Eddie kicks himself. Everyone did everything wrong thinking they were doing right by Chris. Buck tries to take blame for not pointing out Chris's "Everyone leaves." Eddie won't let him and blows up again at himself for holding everything in and it ended up hurting his son. Buck sits in on an emergency session with Eddie.

Through all of this, Eddie and Buck finally come together at some point.

Chris's therapy is brutal (yelling, throwing things) and Eddie tries to stop it several times, but they explain that Chris might only get worse and they start talking about possible medication. It breaks his heart to have to walk away every time from Chris screaming for him.

---

A few days later, a bad call comes in and Josh waves over at Sue with a stricken face before pointing at Eddie. She distracts Eddie so he doesn't realize something is wrong.

They sit him down and explain that Buck had been trapped during a call to construction site where an inexperienced crane operator had caused a collapse. The person he was trying to help freaked out and knocked against an unfinished support wall, bringing more of the building down.

"The foreman... had a broken hip and heavy bleeding from a compound fractured tibia. Buck was trying to carry him by himself because... He was heavy, Eddie. With his flailing, Ravi couldn't hold on. They were trying to get to them with a stretcher, but there was too much debris to get it through to them."

Buck's being rushed into surgery with a large piece of broken wood in his abdomen being the largest worry. Ravi is also heading into surgery with internal injuries, broken ribs and a collapsed lung, severe concussion, and lacerations everywhere. The foreman is doa from blunt force trauma to the torso.

Eddie rushes to the hospital. Everyone is grim and crying. No one will look at or talk to him, and he believes they're silently blaming him (not really, they just don't know what to say). He collapses into a chair and goes catatonic, losing several hours, despite Hen and Bobby trying to get his attention.

Maddie shows up (She's been in a facility outside of L.A. the entire time) after the employees told her about Buck's accident from the news. She slaps Eddie (She apologizes later) demanding to know where he was. He fumbles while trying to explain.

"You left because Chris said you could die!? Everyone dies, Eddie, and now it may be my baby brother! I already lost one, dammit! Now I may lose both! You weren't there because your son cried wolf!"

"I know I punched him. I was wrong in doing so and I might not get to apologize! I might have been mad and flipping out over Maddie, but I still had in the back of my mind that you would be there for him. Of all people, I didn't expect you to walk away!"

Eddie flees to the chapel where Bobby finds him and sits with him as he falls to pieces.

"Chris. Fuck! How do I tell him? How did Buck do this? I wasn't there, Bobby. He's already scared of death and people dying. I just got Buck back. I left... because of Chris. Because of Chris..."

"Eddie, stop. You shouldn't go. You might say something you'll regret."

"I'm going to swing by Buck's room first."

"Eddie."

"I already have regrets, Bobby. Chris needs to know."

---

"I would have been there! He died twice on the operating table! I would have been able to help carry that man. But I wasn't. I left because of you. I made a promise to have his back and I broke it. He told me he promised not to leave you, but he could die. Right this second as I'm talking he could die. I wasn't there when he needed me!

I watched him flatline. He died again while I was begging him to stay. I'm going to hear those alarms in my nightmares for years! The future together we talked about crumbled to dust before my eyes until they got him back!"

"Death comes for everyone, Chris. No matter what we do! We are not immortal. I love you so much Chris, but right now... I need to walk away. I don't want to blame you for this, Chris, but... I wasn't there for Buck. I made my decision because of what you said before I thought everything through. It was my issues, but you pulled the trigger. I would have been there! My head and heart are battling right now. I need to leave. I think it's best if you stay here and talk it out with Mr. Riggins. I'm going back to the hospital where my therapist is going to meet me."

"I want to come home! I want to see Buck! Daddy!"

"That house hasn't been a home since I let Buck walk out the door when he tried to talk to me after the party. You need help, Chris. Help I can't give you. I need it, too. But, right now we don't know how to support each other. I made a rash decision instead of getting us the help we needed. I can't... Chris... Please. Mr. Riggins will talk you through the possibility of Buck... dy-dying. I can't right now. I need to go seek my own support."

---

"Eddie! Josh called me in a frenzy telling me to get my ass to you. And then you called me, too, barely understandable. Eddie, look at me. Whoa!"

"Got him."

"I... I... Oh my god. Help me. I hate my son right now. I can't... Please. I'm blaming my son, damn it! I would have been there if he hadn't... Fuck!"

"Wow wow. Okay. I'm glad he called me. As far as we know, Buck's alive. Remember that. Right now, he's alive. Deep breaths, Eddie. Let's go find a quiet room for us to talk in. Come on."

"Bobby."

"I'm right here, Eddie. Do you want me in there with you?"

"Please."

"Okay."

---

"Thank you. For coming as fast as you could."

"I'm not charging him for this. Holy shit, this is all messed up. I'm not leaving. If ... He needs me here. And you, sir."

"Call me Bobby. Wild horses couldn't drag me out of this hospital right now."

---

Happy physical healing at Eddie's after Buck's discharge and Chris finally emotionally healing.

I've had a really bad day, so the angst ran strong and didn't let me add more to the good ending here.

Or...

If you decide on the mcd route, Eddie and Chris are going to have a tough time coming back together from it. Eddie possibly going back to El Paso after the funeral with video conferences with his therapist while Chris lives with Pepa/Abuela.

---

They heard Maddie's scream before they opened the door. Bobby could only watch in horror as Eddie slowly crumpled to his knees, and continued to pitch until his face was buried in his hands against the floor. His therapist beside him rapid-firing hushed words in his ear. The bellow of anguish had the entire room quieting, even Maddie freezing solid. Two. A third before Eddie's back arched with a fourth before blindly punching at the floor.

"I should have been there! I should have been there! Fuck! Fuck! Buck, come back. Buck, no. Nonononono. Don't leave me. Please. This can't be happening. I just got you back! I finally told you I love you! I was supposed to be there! Buck!"

---

"Have you read it yet?"

"No. I haven't been able to. I love... loved him, mom. So much."

"I know, Eddie. At least he knew. You were able to tell him before..."

"I left him. I was supposed to be his partner. I walked away thinking it was best. We were talking about the possibility of me going back to the 118 after Chris and I both got better. Now I feel like I've lost it all. I can't look in a mirror without flinching, and Chris... I couldn't even talk to him the other day. He kept saying I'm sorry over and over. But, it's that foreman's fault. If he hadn't freaked about bleeding out because Buck wasn't, and I quote, "moving your ass fast enough." he'd still be alive. He would be, too, the fool."

"Buck was there for us. Every. Time. After Shannon. After the tsunami. After the well. The sniper. When he wasn't at work, he was at my house taking care of us. Then... fucking Mitchell happened. It all started to fall apart. I wasn't there for him when he needed me. I kept it all in and sucked it up like papi always told me to."

"Eddie."

"No! He gets his tiny share of blame in this. What he taught me is toxic and I swore I wouldn't raise my kid the same way. Well, joke's on me, he learned it from watching me anyway! Buck tried, mom, to get me to talk. Several times and I kept pushing him away. I pushed him away and then I thought... I thought I had him ba-ck."

"Eddie."

"Papi, sorry. I didn't know you were standing there."

"No, Eddie, I'm the one who's sorry. I'm so sorry. The men in our family never learn. We're stubborn to a fault that we're always right. When your uncle Raul lost his wife, he became this... emotionless shell. We knew it wasn't healthy, but we did nothing because that was the way we were taught. Men don't cry. Men need to be strong."

"When your abuelo died, I never let you see my grief because that is what he taught me, too. I should have. I never thought something like this would happen. And, now I have to see the results in a brokenhearted son and distressed grandson. A personal nightmare of my own creation."

"You don't need my permission, Lord knows you don't, but don't hold it in any more. You think I don't see it. When you came back from Afghanistan, we saw it, how broken you were, but turned a blind eye. With Shannon we saw it. No more. We're here. Dammit, we should have been there for you sooner, but we are now. So grieve, son. Let it out. For Buck. For Chris. For Shannon. For yourself. Read it, Eddie. Whatever you need, son. We're here."

Edmundo,

Kidding. Hopefully I made you quickly smile or make one of your cute scowls. Yes, they're adorable. Don't try to argue with anyone. Now to the hard part...

Eddie,

If you're reading this, Eddie, I'm no longer here. I'm sorry. I would never leave you or Chris by choice. Never.

Whatever the reason, I tried to fight to come home to you both. I would never give up if there was a chance. I guess if you're reading this, there wasn't one. Again, I'm sorry.

I love you so much. Hopefully, by the time you read this, I'll have grown some nerve and told you this. But, it's more than that. If I haven't, I'm sorry you're learning about it here and now.

I don't just love you as a best friend. I don't just love you as the best father to one of the best kids I'll ever know. The second being Jee. I don't just love you as a partner where I had your back while you had mine.

I mean I'm in love with you. Marry you kind of love. Kiss you breathless kind of love. Hold you in my arms as you fall asleep kind of love. And if I didn't tell you, don't be angry. Please.

If I did, hopefully it was soon enough to love you for as long and as hard as I could. That's if you love me back, or there's a possibility that you might be able to. That's something we, as so now, haven't talked about. Surprise! I'm bisexual if you didn't know.

Sometimes this love feels so massive, I feel like I'm stuck to the ground, while at others like I could float through the sky.

Right now you're with Ana, so I'll keep all of this to myself. If you marry her, I'll take this love with me to the grave it seems I'm now in. Again, I'm sorry, and if I could I would have never left.

If I'm also married, know that I probably never stopped loving you, too. It may have dulled, but I know for certain it will never fade completely. But, as long as I was able to be at your side somehow, I was happy.

You gave me a home. My safe space to go to when I needed to warm my soul. You smile and sass. Chris's laugh and search for knowledge.

Wherever I am now, hopefully it is somewhere where I can watch over you. Maybe I'm shooting the shit with Shannon right now waiting on you and anyone else that comes along to join us in the hopefully distant future.

If there's another life after this instead, hopefully we meet again. And again after that one. And again until the end of time itself.

Please watch over Maddie for me. This is going to be hard for her. She will have lost both her siblings. Don't let her sink. Lean on each other with Chim's support of you both. The support of the 118.

If I'm married, to whomever that may be (hopefully this is a pointless request because it's you I'm married to), please keep an eye on my spouse, too. I know I'm asking a lot of you here, but I trust you to watch my back even when I'm gone by watching over those I love. Including yourself.

Hug Chris (and Jee) every day you can for me and remind him I love him always even from beyond the grave. Even if he has kids of his own, remind him for me. I asked Maddie to remind him, too, so on some days he may get two hugs. Would you remind Jee for me so she also gets two? I asked Chim to give all of his spare hugs to Maddie, but he may give a few extra to Jee and Chris occasionally as well.

Because I do love Chris. He may not be my blood, but he is the kid I'd move a mountain for with my bare hands, fistful by fistful, if he asks.

If I (we?) have more kids, I plan on rewriting all of these in the future to include them. If I haven't, let them know I love them. I love them so much. They get reminder hugs, too, by the way.

I know. I know you. Grieve, please. Let your love for me, however deep it is, shine through your tears. Drop by drop. Afterwards, keep smiling because wherever I am you're keeping me warm through each one while I wait for you. Be it in an afterlife or for our next one.

If we are together (and married?), please move on. Love. Live. Be happy again. I want you to. Don't become one of those cranky old codgers that yell at kids to stay off their lawn.

If you're young enough to swing it, find another partner to share the rest of your life with like Bobby and Athena did. If your older, still find someone to share the rest of it with, like my grandma did when she found grandpa Earl in the nursing home.

I love you. I love you. More than I can put in words here, but hopefully in life I was able to show you by actions as well as words.

Until I see you again. I love you.

Evan "Buck" Buckley (Diaz? Buckley-Diaz? Hopefully.)

"Drop. Drop by drop by dr-op."

"Eddie!"

"He wanted to ma-rry me and have more kids."

"Oh, Eddie, my baby, come here."

---

"Until we meet again, Evan, for whatever comes next."

[saltisnacks]

Question for therapists only in the fandom, please.

If 4x13, 4x14, and 5a happened in reality instead of fiction, and you were given Eddie and/or Chris as a patient, how would you approach all of this?

How would you try to get Eddie to open up instead of fighting against it like he did with Frank?

What do you think caused Chris to say what he did? How would you help him? What approaches would you use?

Eddie is obvious because it's literally everything he's been through and hasn't dealt with yet.

What would you hope would happen? Do or say?

I'm curious.

[saltisnacks]

Chris is almost a perfect combination of Eddie and Buck mentally and emotionally. Buck's abandonment issues and hiding his real emotions, and Eddie's snark and struggle to give voice to anything concerning himself.

Let me give a scenario, plus a few asides, to demonstrate this and bring 5a to a close. I seriously doubt something like this will happen in the show. I just hope they handle it with care and correctly. If someone wants to use this in a work, please let me know.

For starters, at some point during the time skip, Carla gave Eddie a firm kick in the butt to get Chris into therapy.

One thing they could do, and could extend over several episodes, is have Eddie and Chris involved in an accident where Chris comes out of it with bumps and bruises, but Eddie... not so well.

And Chris sees the firefighters (maybe Mehta), who recognizes Eddie, working relentlessly to get Eddie and him free. It would help Chris see that accidents happen at any time anywhere.

Adding a cut to save dashes because this is long.

Comparison scene between safe correct usage of car seats with another not so lucky child (who still survives!) in another accident. Show an ending screen listing websites for where to find certified car seat technicians "in your area" and a notice that not all fire stations can check child seats anymore which is still the assumption by many.

Again, Buck comes to stay with him where he assumes Chris and Carla knew about the will. He drops that bomb on all three of them. TayKay doesn't understand why he would agree to this when Eddie has family that could take in Chris. Chris sasses, "Buck is family."

So there's another "wrench." The idea of suddenly being responsible for another man's child if she stays with Buck. She does eventually want kids, but by her timing and decision - not a preteen with CP out of tragedy.

I really want someone to work through his "Everyone leaves." This isn't healthy and shame on them not having Buck tell Eddie to get Chris back into therapy asap. That should have rang alarm bells with his own abandonment issues. While the "everyone" isn't true, life progresses. People move. People drift apart for a lot of reasons. People die. That's life. The similarity between Buck and Chris here...

"Can I ask what you talked about in therapy today? You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. Or, you could wait for your dad to wake up from his nap."

"Everyone leaves."

"You know, I used to think the same thing. I know what getting left behind is like. I'd never willingly do that to you. Not by choice."

"Really? People left you?"

"Well, you see..." Audio fades out first then fade to black while Buck is still talking to Chris.

Eddie now has no income coming due to the accident because of realistic post-concussion symptoms (Let's put Ryan's acting skills to a different test) - headache, nausea, vomiting, etc. The 118 rotates checking in on Eddie. Chris overhears Bobby giving Eddie donated money (which he tries to refuse) to help keep them afloat because they're (still) a part of their found family.

"I miss you guys. I miss..."

"I know, Eddie."

Chris after hearing his dad sound so sad finally talks about the dangers of Eddie working as a firefighter and how unhappy Eddie has been after leaving. "Chris, your mom didn't want to be hit by a car. She was just crossing the street. Your dad didn't want to be shot. He was helping someone who was in a bad situation. Just like you didn't ask to be swept up in the tsunami. You were lucky, Chris. Not many were as strong as you to survive a natural disaster. Bad things happen sometimes. Like the accident. But good things do, too. Your dad has helped save a lot of lives."

"I know."

"Do you blame your dad's truck for the accident?"

"No. That's silly. The other guy hit us." A pause. "Oh. I think I get it now. It wasn't dad's fault he got shot."

"It could have been any of the firefighters on scene that day. He was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. The guy that shot your dad is the one who was wrong."

The therapist asks if he/she can bring in Eddie and they finally talk. "Eddie, you can't lie. Not now. Not here. Not to Chris. Are you happy not being a firefighter? Because if you're not happy, Chris isn't going to be happy. If you give up what you love, you may end up resenting your own son in the future." Or, some version of this. I'm not a therapist and I hope 9-1-1 talks to some real therapists on how to handle this.

The accident wasn't Eddie's fault. Between the other driver's insurance and his own, he ends up with a fully paid for nice used truck in replacement. Buck, who is on Eddie's insurance, took care of everything after a research spiral that nailed both companies to the wall to get it done. He drops off the truck with a "Tadah!" as he tossed the keys to Eddie.

"I picked up a booster seat, so as soon as you're cleared to drive, you're both good to go."

Buck and Eddie get in an "argument" again about him not being there for Eddie and Chris. "No! You don't get to take the blame for this. It's my fault! I refused to talk to anyone. About any of this. Not to Chris. Not to you. Not to Bobby or Hen. No one!"

"Eddie, I could have pushed harder."

"And I would have shoved right back. Probably so hard it would have made things even worse. Don't think I don't remember the grocery store. I said some stupid hurtful things because I was holding it all in. Again. I knew how to strike where it hurts just like I did while fighting."

"Eddie."

"No, you tried over and over, but I was... stupidly listening to my father in my head. Suck it up, Eddie. Men don't cry. Push through. Therapy is for the weak. No wonder they call it toxic masculinity."

”I never learn from my past mistakes. I let it all bottle up again. I showed my kid it was okay to do the same, and he did until it finally exploded! I've hurt him, Ana, you because I hid what I was feeling. I used my kid to hide!"

"I ended up hurting him because I couldn't open my mouth and let everything out. I failed him again as a father. I don't want him to grow up like I did. I have to try to make this right. Learn to open up when I need to. I didn't talk after we were taken hostage. I just went home and cuddled my kid with a "He's fine." and then shoved that down, too. I didn't tell anyone I almost fell out of that helicopter at the hospital!"

"What?! Eddie?!"

"One more item on the trauma pile. Nothing good has ever come out of me being in one."

And unlike dropping the bomb about leaving the 118 on everyone... "Chris and I talked during his last session. I'm... going to start going to a therapist he/she recommended. I need to stop fighting the idea that therapy is showing weakness. That thinking I have to struggle on my own is bad coping. Ha! She was right. It does sound like repression."

"Who? Ana?"

"No, the cardiologist."

"Oh."

"Is Chris weak? No. But, Chris's therapist gave me a warning. I could start to resent this at Chris, and I don't want that. It was my loaded issues, but he was the pulled trigger for my rash decision. When Chris and I finally... start to feel stronger, I'd like to come back. To the 118, I mean."

"Really?"

"If Bobby lets me and there's a spot available."

Something here about Buck being the "backup plan." If they still insist on pushing B&T, have Eddie restate that Buck is the right choice, and that he's family. If B&T are kaput, maybe Buddie begins here when Eddie finally pushs through his barrier to tell Buck how he feels.

"Eddie, this isn't a no. It's just a pause. Until you feel like yourself again."

"It... might take a while."

"That's okay. I can wait."

"I need to do this. For Chris, but mostly for myself."

"Every step of the way, whatever you need, I've got your back and Chris's."

"And we've got yours."

Season 6 starts off with Eddie still separate from the 118, but healing and happier. Video only showing the back of Eddie's head talking with his therapist, and clips of Eddie talking between him and Chris with and without Buck present. Ramped up covert flirting and pushing buttons.

Until the mid season finale where Eddie surprises everyone, except Bobby, when he pops over the loft in full uniform with a "Surprise!" Or, maybe Bobby says additional help is coming during a fire and Eddie pulls up in a station vehicle in his turnout gear.

The back half is them fighting to stay together because two firefighters in the same house aren't supposed to date. Normally they're either put on opposing shifts or one is transferred.

They could pull a Flashpoint where they don't realize they're being observed, and show their ability to walk away with a patient while the other is also in trouble. Better for Buck to walk away from Eddie because he would be the biggest one they'd worry about honestly after they saw him digging in the mud after the well collapse.

"This can't become the norm. There are regulations for a reason. I'll have people all over the city trying to date. One mess up and I want them separated, Nash. Period. Understood?"

"Yes, sir."

[saltisnacks]

Chapters: 17/19 Fandom: Finder no Hyouteki | Finder Series Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Kou (Finder Series)/Original Character(s), Asami Ryuichi/Takaba Akihito, Takato (Finder Series)/Original Character(s) Characters: Kou (Finder Series), Takaba Akihito, Asami Ryuichi, Takato (Finder Series), Finder no Hyouteki | Finder Series - Character, Kirishima Kei, Suoh Kazumi, Original Characters Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, POV Alternating, Sexuality Crisis, Sparring, Cussing, Major Character Injury, Varying Length Chapters, Angst, Comfort, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Pining Kou, Mutual Pining, Naïve Kou, Target Practice, Cohabitation, Explosions, Parkour, Poor Housekeeping, Dialogue Heavy, Past, Q & A in Author's Notes, Monologue, Inner Dialogue, Almost Kiss, Scrabble, Movie Night, Domestic, bed stealing, Light Angst, Paintball, Clubbing, Dancing, Alcohol, Porn Watching, Masturbation in Shower, Flashbacks, Human Trafficking, Gun Violence, Sexual Content, Safe Sane and Consensual, Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, First Time Blow Jobs, Boys Kissing, Past Child Abuse, Xenophobia, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Torture, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Crass language, Implied Sexual Content, ooc Asami, Arson, Other Additional Tags to Be Added Series: Part 16 of Bakeneko Summary:

“Oh no. Now you have to tell us.” Minako poked him in the arm.

“My wife is a fujoshi.”

“Oh hush, you.” She swatted at Takato, making all but Kou laugh.

“How did you two get together anyway?”

“I first noticed him when…”

[saltisnacks]

I’ve gotten more than one anon ask from a teenager, paranoid that they’re a pedophile or a predator for crushing on a peer 2-3 years younger than them. Because anti-shippers/fandom purity police constantly use the term “pedophile” for ships between teens 2-3 years apart, it’s no wonder why real teens are confused and terrified. So I wanted to make a post with proper definitions of these terminologies and link to some sources, so that maybe it’ll reassure some other poor teen out there that it’s perfectly fine for them to crush on their schoolmate.

First I’m going to get this out of the way: I’m talking about crushing and dating and having a romantic relationship. Sex between a legal adult (18 and up) and a legal minor (17 and down) could be illegal depending on the age of consent where you live, and any Romeo and Juliet laws that may or may not be in place. That’s way more complicated, so I won’t be touching on teenage relationships where sex is involved. While I’m on this subject though, a quick PSA: if you’re under 18, do not take/send nudes at all. You could be charged with child pornography for “self-producing” your own nudes. As dumb as that sounds, it happens. I don’t agree with courts that do it, punishing hormonal teenagers for having hormones is dumb, but it still happens. It’s not worth it, don’t do it.

One more thing: I’m talking about relationships between peers in the same age group. Between two young adults, adolescents, or teenagers. Note that there is some overlap between these groups (i.e. 15 year old is a teenager and an adolescent but not an adult, while an 18 year old is all three, while a 20 year old is only a young adult). I’m not justifying age gaps that are obviously wrong and illegal, like a 30 year old and a 14 year old, so please do not put words in my mouth.

Moving on to the topic at hand…

—

If the only “concerning” thing about a relationship is a minimal age gap between two peers in the same age group, the relationship is probably okay.

The existence of an age gap alone does not make someone a pedophile or predator or child groomer. Intent needs to involved. Ill intent. Along with other abusive, predatory, manipulative behaviors.

—

Let’s break down some of these terms further:

A pedophile is attracted to prepubescent children. If the younger party in the relationship is not prepubescent, the older person is not a pedophile.

Here is the criteria for being a pedophile, as defined by the American Psychiatric Association.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/conditions/pedophilia

If there is less than a 5 year age gap between teens (i.e. a 15 year old and a 19 year old), there is probably not an issue.

If however, for example, an 18 year old is attracted to someone who’s 13 and still prepubescent, there may be an issue there and the older teen should seek help or talk to someone about it. This doesn’t mean they’re a bad person. If they haven’t hurt anyone, they’ve done nothing wrong. It may just be a disorder that they have no control over, so that’s why it’s a good idea to seek help for it.

—

Moving away from “pedophilia” now. What about people who prey on (i.e. are intentionally seeking to harm) teens who are post-pubescent? That person is not a pedophile, but they are a predator or a child groomer.

Which leads to the next point, what are some examples of “ill intent” when it comes to predatory relationships? What exactly is a predator or a child groomer?

This site lists the definition of grooming, along with some red flag behaviors.

https://www.d2l.org/child-grooming-signs-behavior-awareness/

First I want to point out the word “deliberate.” You can’t accidentally groom someone, like I’ve seen multiple fandom police claim. Posting properly tagged and flagged nsfw fanart on a public forum like tumblr or twitter that allows nsfw content is NOT grooming. Grooming is a deliberate act. It involves intent. If an adult is sending private DMs of nsfw sexual fanart to a minor that they KNOW to be a minor, that is completely inappropriate and grooming behavior. Same goes for any nsfw sexual talk, like an adult having a nsfw rp chat with a minor, that’s wrong too. But simply posting/liking/sharing nsfw fandom content on a public website is not grooming.

That link has a longer list of red flag behaviors, along with examples, but here are three I want to especially point out.

A lot of these sites seem to write their info with the focus on young children being groomed, going by the language they use (”child’s natural curiosity”). But teenagers can definitely be groomed also, in the same ways. If an older partner is taking advantage of a vulnerable teen due to an abusive home life, or trying to isolate them from their family and friends, or overstepping any emotional/physical/sexual boundaries, that teen is very likely in a dangerous situation and needs to confide in a trusted friend, and eventually in a trusted adult, about it.

—

I also wanted to share this source as well, just as a general example of other signs of abuse in a relationship. The National Domestic Violence Hotline has a chart that lists common behavior patterns of an abusive, manipulative partner.

https://www.thehotline.org/is-this-abuse/abuse-defined/

This chart uses the example of a male abuser and a female victim, but they have another page and chart for lgbt+ relationships.

As their site says, this can apply to anyone. Age, gender, sexual orientation, it doesn’t matter, anyone is capable of being an abuser or being a victim. Notice how this has similar tactics as the child predator/groomer red flag list too, such as isolation.

Also notice the different manipulative behaviors in this chart. This chart is just a good rule of thumb for red flags in any kind of relationship, be it sexual, romantic, platonic or familial.

Here is another source that lists more red flag behaviors, but more specifically for teenage relationships.

https://www.teendvmonth.org/resources/signs-teen-dating-violence/

—

With that in mind, here are some hypothetical scenarios. Let’s use a specific example of a 18 year old high school senior (12th grade) dating a 15 year old high school sophomore (10th grade).

This relationship could be bad if the senior is using the sophomore for their own personal gain. Taking advantage of the fact that the younger person is inexperienced when it comes to dating, and using that fact to manipulate them into a relationship. Maybe the senior isolates the sophomore from their family and friends, makes them feel guilty for wanting to hang out with friends, makes them quit their after-school sports activities or forces them to cancel plans with friends so that they can spend more time together. Maybe the older teen controls how they dress or what they do, or makes them do things that they’re uncomfortable with. All of those are signs of an abusive relationship. If the older teen doesn’t care about the younger teen or about their feelings and is just using them, obviously that is an unhealthy, abusive relationship. (*It’s important to note though, that this exact thing can happen between two people of the same age too. A partner who’s the same age as you can also be controlling and abusive. It can happen with friendships too, it doesn’t have to be limited to dating relationships.)

On the other hand, this senior/sophomore relationship very well could be a perfectly healthy one too. Maybe they are in the same after-school club and bonded through that. Maybe they’ve already known each other and have been friends for years, maybe their families are friends, etc. And they’ve recently started crushing on each other and decided to date. As long as they respect each other, it’s fine.

That’s why you need to know what is going on in a relationship before you judge. An age gap by itself is not proof enough that a relationship is bad or abusive or predatory. One of the partners needs to have ill-intent, and exhibit these abusive red flag behaviors.

—

So to sum up everything, if the ONLY thing in a relationship is that there is an age gap, but both people are otherwise peers and in the same age group/range, and none of the above red flags are present, your relationship is fine and you have nothing to worry about. You know you’re a good person, your partner is a good person, you have family and friends supporting the both of you, you care about and respect each other, then you’re fine.

You’re not a pedophile or a predator or any awful thing like that. Remember, those are deliberate acts and involve ill-intent. Please don’t let fandom police scare you. They’re internet strangers, they know NOTHING about you or your personal life or your relationships or your home life or your upbringing or your family and friends. They’re judging you based solely on the fact that there’s an age gap, and nothing else. They have nothing to go by. They’re not trying to educate others on healthy or unhealthy relationship dynamics. They’re just instilling fear in people to back up their own moral superiority or ship war or whatever tf is driving them to be like That and spread misinformation and make inaccurate generalizations. And they don’t seem to realize or care how dangerous it is that they’re telling teens that they’re predators when they’re not. They don’t care about victims. If they did, they’d be spreading helpful advice, but instead they’re just spreading fear and misinformation. Please stop listening to them. And please for all that is good, don’t take advice from them. Talk to adults in your personal life, if not a parent, then an older cousin or an aunt or uncle or teacher or counselor. Or Google it and find reputable sources for yourself. That is much more reliable than taking advice from people who throw around the word “pedophile” to describe a ship between two teenage anime characters. People need to use common sense and look at relationships on a case-by-case basis. And anti-shippers/fandom purity police are unable to do that.

To fandom police: stop telling teenagers that they’re a predator or pedophile for dating their schoolmate who’s two years younger than them. It’s none of your business, and don’t give me that “but if they’re hurting themselves or others, I need to say something” BS. You’re a stranger, you do not know their personal lives. You know nothing about what is going on except that an age gap is involved, that’s it, and that is not enough to jump to such a drastic conclusion and serious accusation. It’s not your place because you don’t know their life or their situation. Also frankly, it’s damn weird and highly inappropriate for you to be inserting yourselves into the personal lives of some random teenager on the internet that you don’t know (especially if you’re an adult). You think shippers are gross for “being invested in the love lives of fictional teens,” yet here you are trying to control the love lives of real life teens. Please get some perspective.

Edit: Another point I forgot to mention, so I’m tacking this onto the end.

Stop acting like all teens x-years-old are the exactly same as every other teen who is also x-years-old. “I’m 18 and I would NEVER date a 15 year old because they’re practically a baby and I’m such a mature adult already and-” Good for you, you want a cookie? Repeat after me: not everyone is the same as you. One 18 year old might be socially awkward but nice and with no dating experience at all, and would fair well with dating a 15 year old who also is in their first relationship. Another 18 year old might be really responsible for their age due to circumstances in their family life, and are fully capable of handling themselves and dating a 21 year old college classmate. Everyone is different. Two people of different ages may just “click” with each other, they’re on the same wavelength, or they have similar experiences, etc. Just because you personally wouldn’t date someone 2-3 years younger/older than yourself doesn’t mean 1) that it’s wrong, or 2) that others wouldn’t be okay with it for their own personal (and valid) reasons.

Again: it is not your business to interfere with an internet stranger’s personal life and relationships when the only thing you have to go off of is “there’s an age gap.” I’m begging y’all, please look at this with the nuance that it deserves. It is not black-and-white, and your black-and-white thinking is really messing up teenagers and making them feel bad about completely normal and healthy age-appropriate crushes or desires to date someone else.

[saltisnacks]

Happy birthday, Shiro! 🖤

[saltisnacks]

Y E A H

[saltisnacks]

[saltisnacks]

I just love this show a lot even tho season 8 was a mess and don’t want it to die out 😭😭❤️🧡🧡💙💙💜💜🧡💚💚🧡❤️🖤💜❤️💖💖💖💓💚❤️💙

[saltisnacks]

A MOOD or what?

made by @theseavoices as a gift because i was sad about #tumblrgeddon

also a reminder this is the best place to stay in contact with fandom creators - there’s 7 millions new invites being generated this month so lots of us will have them to give away

[saltisnacks]