sammiejd

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When you're an adult and you see advertisements for new episodes of "SpongeBob" and "The Fairly Odd Parents"

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make!! every!! bite!! count!!!

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Female, presenting nipples.

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21 Jump Street (2012) dir. Phil Lord, Chris Miller

BONUS:

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Steve Carell | Saturday Night Live | Nov. 17, 2018

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i hate it when u stop being friends w someone or u break up w someone cos uve got all this information about them like at the back of ur mind like their birthday or their favorite game or whatever, and even years later things will come up and you’ll think about that person and its like. oh. and it never really Stops

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when you’re watching a movie and u recognize one of the actors in it from somewhere but u haven’t watched any of the movies or shows listed on their imdb

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bassists more like baessists am i right ladies

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I’m truly the friend who will fight your ex who did you dirty even after you get over it. like I will see them 5 years later and be like “square fuck up you know exactly what this asswhoopin is for”

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edward: if only i could read bella’s mind and unravel its mysteries! does she like mike? tyler? eric? does she like… me? that cannot be true, for she could never see me as someone worthy of love!

meanwhile bella’s mind:

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me: *walking*

my cat: i am going to run in front of you. i am going to sprint in front of you so fast mid step and you are going to punt me into the sun

me: okay sir yes sir 

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I keep going back to watch this video it just captures my sense of humour perfectly

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Me…right now