icarus | 21 | genderfluid butch | bi dyke | he/she/they | yo i’m sap and i say stuff here! 🎨art only acc: sapsolace🎨
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Fun Fact
Tumblr has been banned in Indonesia for providing people with access to pornographic content.
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#started writing this at 11:11. i'd never heard about the whole making a wish thing till a couple years ago#and i scrambled to think of something i really hoped for. and i came up with hoping for the love i put out into the world#to find its way back to me someday. and then my day made its way back into my head. and i remember holding a shy hand 10 times smaller than#my own. and i remembered smiles and laughs and jokes. and i remembered making a whole room of sad bored preteens crowd around me playfully#arguing over game results. and smiling and looking so alive even though we'd only known each other for a day or two.#and i remembered sitting and eating lunch with my friends/coworkers. being waited on and called for and thought about#and maybe i've been too busy to speak with my closest friends all week. maybe i've yearned a bit or overthought a little and sometimes#that gets to me around 11:11.#but then sometimes i spend 10 minutes thinking about all the wonderful lovely rhings that've happened to me. all of the ways love has found#me again. when i am shown care and trust. when my loved ones go out of their way to drive me. text and call me when they're exhausted#shoot me 15 bucks for a hot meal. bike an hour to see me. so many mountains big and small moved just for me#i am so so tired. and a little stressed and that's okay#but sometimes i crave a specific kind of love to a point where i forget it's already all around me#and i remember i've already got my wish :]#sap says
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I love messy femmes. Sleazy, gas station femmes. Chronically underdressed femmes who sleep far too much or too little, who answer my texts at odd hours. Femmes with ripped jeans and scuffed shoes. Irresponsible, impulsive femmes with long, unstyled hair. The messiness so hot to me I can’t explain it
#UGHHHHHHHH#ha. yeah#sorry my bad something primal happened there#i have a type and this is certainly one of them#txt#butchposting
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artist in denial of being depressed: omg this 2 month long art block has been crazy... sorry i haven't updated any of my fics in a long while! it's just been super difficult to daydream! so weird that i've lost a little bit of passion for my current comfort character and ocs... this couldn't possibly have any implications or alternative explanations
#this is the longest art block i've ever had#it's been like well over a year now#i've been very busy w. life. and i have found other creative mediums here and there/rekindled old hobbies like reading#but. it still makes me sad to have no energy/time or even drive to draw#i dunno#txt
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#y'know. there's being nosey. and then like Detective level nosey#but i don't think enough people talk about the way it feels to accidentally discover a lot about a person without them knowing#it feels so private like. hey i just stumbled into the library of your soul and you don't even know i'm here#and you carefully thumb through the books and pages and piece things together and they have no idea#and you didn't MEAN to be there but you are#anyways. all of this is a dramatic way of saying my friend accidentally linked me to her spotify and like#look#it's SPOTIFY. but if all ur playlists are public and i can look at them i will and tbh?#i feel like i could know everything i need to know about a person based off of that. like read to filth#hm. anyways#sap says#fun fact of the day ig
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being queer and seeing historical queer love is like a punch to the gut in a good way every time
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there’s absolutely nothing better than reading a 100k word fanfic, that is until you remember you have a body that is starving, thirsty and incredibly sleep deprived and hasn’t used the bathroom since the sun set 8 hours ago
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there is still time. there is still time. until your bones are in the fucking ground there is still time.
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#today i saw a couple parents walking their little kids down the street. dif families but it made me really happy#i was up really early today so it was like whenever i wake up early enough to see birds/snails#rn in the planned parenthood waiting room theres a lady w her kid and i just love when people actually like#idk. converse w their small kids like adults dhgkjgkd it makes me so so happy#like answering their questions#anyways#she's filling a page w lil rainbow drawings now#god i love kids i hope i'm a dad in another universe#c':#sap says
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One thing I appreciate about my cat son is that if he, who knows how it feels to be trapped in a room, so much as begins to suspect that I, his father, am trapped in a room, then he will immediately do everything in his meager power to rescue me
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I'm sorry my stupid gay tail started wagging when I saw you. I'll go .
#foot starts rapidly tapping around hot dykes. or if i am excited#which is basically the same thing#txt#mecore
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why do you like watching guy on guy porn if you're a lesbian? not to sound rude !
because i like to have guy on guy sex with other women sometimes
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extremely cool article you should read if you haven’t already
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they make me so unwell‼️
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my admiration for stone stems partially from
the dykes I encountered in my twenties who had such specific reactions to being told “no” or “not yet”, their overwhelming entitlement, their scorn towards those they saw as wasting their time, their inability to see other dykes as anything other than sex objects, and how fast they would turn on you the second you stopped living up to their fantasies surrounding convenient sex that was theirs by right.
#not stone but. yeah. wild how people treat you once you won't give what they thought was theirs#txt#butchposting
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I'VE PLAYED THESE GAMES BEFORE I'M TIRED OF THIS GRANDPA
having a crush at 21 is so stupid like what
#SOBBING AND WAILING#LORD HAVE MERCYYYYY#it's so weird cuz it's like. wow. yeah no thank you. but you're SOOO ridiculously pretty#like shut up stop it STOPP UGHHHHHH#*loud muffled screaming and howling*#being a dyke is the hardest job in the whole wide world#you're gorgeous stop fuckign looking at me w those big ol EYESSS#bullshit. buh. AND I KNOW BETTER SO I'M NOT ACTUALLT INTERESTED BGT THE ANCESTORS. AUGH DOWN DOWM BOY SHUT UPP#i am not doing anything abt this bc i love myself <3 but going a little quietly insane every day BLOWSS. the b in butch stands 4#bullshit i gotta put up w <3#siiiiiiiiigh#i needed to let that out dog bless#txt#sap says
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like i know we're not compatible can i stop finding you attractive now
having a crush at 21 is so stupid like what
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